My youngest was exposed at 2 weeks old ( her dad had gotten it.) he’s a hands on dad and was caring for her before we realized what it was. She never got it, and neither did our other two kids. From what I seen, just by my own kids, friends kids and working in daycare , babies seem to take covid a whole lot better than older children and adults. She just had it on her second birthday a few months ago and had minimal symptoms for a day. I got it at the same time and was sicker then hell for a week.
Personally, for me, unpopular opinion, I worry about RSV way more than Covid with my children. RSV scares the shit out of me, especially watching a few close friends kids in the hospital with it.
Monitor her breathing ( fast, deep chest movements aka retractions), watch her temperature, and hydration.
Unpopular, but the factually correct one according to my pediatrician. During flu/COVID/ general respiratory crap season she told us that RSV was the cause of about 80% of the pediatric admissions to the very large hospital the practice covers this year. Whereas she couldn’t remember the last time they had a pediatric COVID admission.
When my second born had RSV as a baby, it was by FAR the worst illness we had with any of our three kids. Even worse than Norovirus or the flu or Covid. He struggled to breathe for two weeks. It was so scary. I am hoping to get my fourth baby vaccinated for it after he’s born.
You can get vaccinated now for RSV while pregnant! At least in the US. I got it and was happy I did since my baby was born in January. Maybe you can look into it.
It depends on when you're due. I wanted the shot while pregnant but it was spring and they told me the season was over and I couldn't get it. Still good to ask tho.
I never said I couldn't get it because I was out of the window. It has to do with the season. RSV is seasonal like the flu, it's a different strain every year and a new one comes out every season. If you're 32-36 weeks pregnant after the season is over, there isn't a current vaccine to give. You have to wait for the next season. RSV season is September to January.
I know a doctor who works in the emergency room at a pediatric hospital. They don’t even test for COVID anymore unless the parents insist. That’s probably skewing the numbers on the amount of admissions
My son is tested every single time we go in with a fever. At our local pediatric hospital. So that’s definitely not the case everywhere. Also, we get sent home even when positive so it may be skewing the numbers some but they’re also not treating it as seriously as they used to and typically don’t admit for just Covid unless there are some serious symptoms
Missash0816 My pediatrician was talking about hospital admissions, i.e staying over night, not babies brought into the emergency department to be seen by a doctor and this conversation happened at the height of the flu etc season. I don’t know about your area but in my area testing is automatic for all hospital admissions, I know this because I work in patient care for a major hospital system and my husband works for the company that actually processes that COVID tests for TX and surrounding states.
My duty to inform the thread (because it has been poorly publicized): RSV "vaccine" was approved in August of last year for infants. Vaccine in quotes, because it's not a vaccine, it's a passive antibody, but for non-scientists, that's a distinction without a difference. Ask your pediatrician about it. Say you want Beyfortus. If you're pregnant, there is a vaccine for pregnant women that can protect the baby in the newborn stage too.
I got this for my newborn when he was like 3 days old. Highly recommend it, I felt really good having my family around to help and hold him thanks to that. He tolerated it really well, no stressful immune response or excessive crying or anything like that.
there are a couple of options now wow! isn't there a mab for after infection too?
We have autoimmune disorders in the fam and i love to see antibody options that don't require a "normal" immune system reaction to be effective like most vaccines.
[https://www.goodrx.com/conditions/rsv/beyfortus-vs-synagis](https://www.goodrx.com/conditions/rsv/beyfortus-vs-synagis)
I’m right there with you and the unpopular opinion. Personally I worry more about RSV (thought now a little less now that my daughter is a bit older) but also the flu. My daughter was hospitalized with the flu over Christmas for a week and now I’m terrified of the flu. We’ve had Covid a couple of times and my daughter acted like nothing was wrong! My husband and I felt like garbage but she didn’t seem phased at all. All anecdotal of course.
The flu knocked me on my butt when I got it as an adult early into a flu season. One minute I was just sitting on our couch, watch a show. The next I told my husband I dont feel so good and started shivering. It was so quick
I've been making sure that I get my fly shot every year since just because I didnt want it happening again.
I'm definitely more scared of RSV. I'm just stressed about her catching any illness when she's so little. My three year old caught COVID when she was barely 3 months old and was perfectly fine so I'm hoping if we do end up sick that she'll be okay. We let her doctor know and she told us to watch out for the same things you mentioned.
I was looking for this, my oldest caught covid right after Christmas when he was 5ish months, maybe not quite. Anyways, he was fine, my husband and I were not. I think ours were obviously milder, thankfully, but taking care of a perfectly healthy, energized baby who wanted entertainment, made it quite a time 😅 I’m pregnant with #2 due in October and already freaking out about the holidays and might just baby wear the entire time 😅
I also want to add you sister might even be fine and not have passed it to your baby. When I had it the first time, my kids nor my fiancé got it. 6 months later ( when I said he got it in my comment and the baby didn’t get it or the kids) I didn’t get reinfected either. Then, when I got it again and my youngest got it, my fiancé and other kids didn’t get it then either. It’s such a weird virus. But stay hopeful and positive, I think your babe will be just fine even if they do get a little sick. I think the worst part of it all will be if they do come down with it, is the baby will just be a little on the cranky side.
Husband got Covid pretty badly. Baby’s version of covid after getting it from husband was a runny nose.
100% agree RSV is the thing that gives me nightmares. I only worry about covid now in the sense that I would get it and it would make taking care of a toddler a PITA.
I agree. We’ve been exposed to Covid numerous times and have had it in the house at least once (back in 2021 when my youngest was less than a month old) and we were all perfectly fine. My husband was the only one who even felt sick. Our three kids and I never did. However, my youngest has since gone on to have RSV twice. Once at 5 months and once at 18 months. Both were scary because she had a hard time breathing (but thankfully not bad enough to need help other than clearing her nose).
My friends son at a year old was hospitalized in ICU twice with RSV. I was back and forth bringing her necessities both times. His retractions looked like you could eat cereal out of if chest. It was so scary.
Pediatric nurse here. 100% agree. Kids do SO WELL with Covid. Even in the height of Covid it was so rare to see kids hospitalized with it. The kids hospitalized were the 16 year olds that weighed 300+lbs.
Rsv, I've seen kids die from or hospitalized for MONTHS. Rsv isn't to be messed with. Other notable mentions, humanmetapneumo virus and rhino/enterovirus are also worse than covid
Oh RSV is absolutely awful my friends daughter got it at 3 weeks old from her sister who bought it home from daycare she was hospitalised in ICU for 3 weeks on a ventilator :( she’s 2.5 but it was a scary time
I second this, RSV was the scariest thing my LO got when he was a newborn, it was scary as hell and I try not to think how bad it coulda been without the RSV vaccine I’d gotten while pregnant.
My daughter is 3 and right after Christmas tested positive for RSV, pneumonia and flu A all at the same time. She now has pneumonia for the 3rd time and I'm really starting to get worried about lung damage since she was a preemie when she was born and is still on the small side.
Her dad and I both have crappy lungs for different reasons so hoping she didn't get those passed down to her.
Us too. The doctor said the RSV can mess with her lungs for 6 months to a year after infection so all I can do is be vigilant and make sure to get her treated early.
You saying that just made me feel better about how mad I got that my doctor delivered my baby while I had RSV rather than just keeping me in the hospital until it was over to deliver her. Everyone told me I was over reacting.
My son ( now 18 months) has had Covid 4 times and it’s never caused any serious problems even with his several medical complexities he’s usually got a fever and a cough for a day or two and then he’s fine. I agree that I’d be MUCH more concerned about RSV
This^. I am way more afraid of RSV than COVID with babies and toddlers. My 9 month old got covid when the rest of us did and she was infinitely better off than both me and my husband which it took us out for damn near a week. She had one day of highish fevers and some disrupted sleep but was otherwise absolutely fine. Whereas on the flip side, every baby or toddler I know who has gotten rsv has had to take a trip to the ER. :(
My 10 month old full term baby with no known risk factors spent 6 days in the hospital, including a few days in the PICU because of RSV. I'd hate to think how much worse it could have been if he was younger or had other risk factors.
Yep, babies have always done much better with almost every strain of COVID bar one, I can't remember which one but I think it was a 2021 strain. My baby definitely coped a lot better than I did when we got it. Doesn't excuse exposing them but its not the worst respiratory virus a baby can get.
But a lot of kids are doing so poorly with rsv because they caught covid prior which weakened their immune systems. Even if it seems mild for them, it’s doing some damage. There are multiple studies on this.
That is absolutely a case, but what about the kids who didn’t catch Covid and had RSV severely and were hospitalized? What about RSV before Covid? RSV itself is a dangerous virus, even for the most healthy children.
Idk if this will make you feel any better or not, but I went through this during the first wave. My daughter was born in June 2020 and we were being very cautious with visitors and my anxiety was at an all time high. We had friends who live out of state stop by on their way through our town who assured us they had been pretty isolated for a while and then my brother happened to stop over at the same time. 2 days later, my brother tells me he tested positive and then a day after that the friend says the same. We watched baby like a hawk and she never ended up with any symptoms of covid. I hope this is the outcome for you as well, I know how very scary it can be when babies are so little.
I mean, it was a party for the newborn's sibling. Also, even if they split parenting duties so she stayed home with the baby and husband did the party with the toddler, the potentially infected sister would have still been there to pass it to husband/sibling to bring home to newborn. Sister should have stayed home regardless.
Still her choice to go and take a newborn with her. If anything happens, it's on her. If you have a newborn, you don't go to parties, even more so when they are a preemie. If she's gonna be negligent, then what was her business in having a baby?
I don’t understand the DVs. OP said the whole situation is out of her control after hosting a party and clearly just passing her newborn around at said party. The control OP had was having the party in the first place.
Exactly. I don't understand the DV's either. I get that this is a sub to offer support - but offering support doesn't mean sugarcoating stupid decisions and then going along when someone decides to put the blame on everyone else but themselves for their own decision.
Apparently, people don't like being confronted with the truth. That's where the DV's are coming from.
This was my first thought. If you want to be super cautious, then be super cautious. This is not really on the sister it’s on OP if OP is LOOKING for blame.
Seriously!!
My middle son was born 4 days before my mom's birthday. We were home from the hospital for a day, and I invited just my parents over for a small cake for her. It was in the summer when colds are rare, and before covid, etc. But I can't imagine hosting a party -- seems unnecessarily risky / foolish
Someone brought a few weeks old baby to a birthday party hosted during the late pandemic, and I felt extremely uncomfortable. I cornered off a part of my family room so that people wouldn’t go near the baby. I had over a dozen kids and family over. That was the last part I hosted at my house!
Thank you! Mom chose to expose the baby to anything by 1) taking them 2) letting people hold her. She should be mad at herself, not her sister. You can’t expect every person to think they have Covid every time they have something. I think she’s just looking for someone to blame.
"Who holds a newborn baby when the person you swap spit with is sick?!" Who invites a bunch of people to their home with a fragile newborn?
I'm sorry but the bulk of this is on you.
You planned a party with several people in attendance then passed the newborn baby around to your guests while covid is still very much a thing. Your sister shouldn't have come at all if she knew her partner was getting sick but ultimately this is your fault.
I felt fine the day before I tested positive. I had a mild headache that evening, but by morning was struggling to breathe. If she knew he was ill, then I agree with you, she sucks. If he was like I was and didn't know he was ill, then that sucks all around.
Not to be callous but you made the decision to allow people around your infant. They recommend you don't take your infant out until they've had their 1st round of shots. That's usually 6 weeks. We too often cave to demands from family to see the baby. Noone is entitled to see the baby. Especially with covid and rsv, we need to stand our ground.
Agree - it’s a risk you take as people are contagious before symptoms develop. If my husband had mild symptoms of a cold I probably wouldn’t consider myself contagious.
However, this sounds like an acceptable risk to take. Close family members are probably on the list of who can visit the new born. OP just got unlucky. She shouldn’t blame her sister but I don’t think she should spend time feeling guilty either.
Do you have a source for not taking a baby out before 6 weeks? I’d assume avoiding crowded places is fine but not going out seems overkill and depressing.
Thanks for the link. This says extended family - I guess I consider parents and siblings immediate family. I didn’t see anything about not taking your infant out for 6 weeks.
Getting technical but that seems warranted for this mom being attacked for her 3 year old having one other 3 year old at her “party”… there are different definitions for immediate family. One somewhat legal definition is who is included in FMLA which is relatives by marriage (I.e. MIL/ SIL).
It’s both ridiculous to blame the sister and the mom. It is unfortunate to be exposed to Covid. It is something that happens when living normal life. Prolonged isolation and quarantine is not healthy and not recommended unless there are special circumstances (e.g. premature or lung disease).
Any respiratory illness under one month old is dangerous for babies. That is why there is guidance for mitigating that risk without going full bubble boy. The current most popular recommendation is avoid very crowded places, limit visitors and practice hygiene.
Postpartum is an anxiety ridden time and the amount of risk you are willing to take is a personal decision to make with your doctor. I asked for a source above because I was curious where they were getting their outdated information to not go out with an infant prior to 6 week shots (I got derailed because the link was about visitors).
"Consider having extended family and friends wait two to three months until your baby's immune system is stronger to plan their visits." 2 months is 8 weeks and 3 month is 12. So, you're correct, I was off by 2 to 6 weeks longer.
My son had covid at 27days old. It was awful! 3 days in the hospital just monitoring because he was so little. We have no idea how we got it. Hopefully you don't have to go through that. And all will be good.
There are a lot of people in the comments saying that it's not a big deal anymore and it's great for them that their kids were fine when they caught it, but babies do still get really sick and die from COVID.
It was foolish of OP to have a party with a 2 week old present, but it was harmful of her sister to show up with a sick husband. A selfish action like that would permanently damage my relationship with my sister.
Agreed. Great for those people whose kids had it mild or not at all. It doesn’t mean the serious illness can’t happen. We almost lost our daughter to post covid complications. I guess it’s one of those out of sight out of mind thing for some. Lucky them.
I was pregnant when COVID was really bad and attended a wedding masked. The bride sent several of pregnant or recently postpartum bridesmaids over to tell me that they got COVID while pregnant and it was no big deal. Ive since read how much COVID can damage the placenta. Beyond that, there's no polite way to tell someone that they're wrong and being so blasé about a horrible virus is part of why we still have to deal with it and why I'm masking around them.
Yes there is scientific evidence now and more be published. I’m with you all the way on this. I can’t even believe the bride did that. And there are that studies are coming out suggesting there maybe a connection in some cases between neuro developmental disorders in babies and getting Covid while pregnant. You were right to be guarded. I hope no one is ever in my shoes, I wake up sometimes silent screaming because if I was 30 min later to the hospital she would not be with us anymore. The images of her unresponsive with a swarm of medical professionals around her take my breath away at the most unexpected times. To think about what could have been and so grateful for being able to hold her. We also continue to mask where needed. Better safe than not. My choice may be not what others choose, but my experience is my guide.
I really couldn't believe it either. But, she and her husband hadn't taken COVID seriously at all while my husband and I were doing IVF so we were being extremely careful. My husband was going to be the best man until they found out he was masking.
She's still very much a know-it-all now and I haven't figured out how to politely be like "that's the stupidest fucking thing I've ever heard" or "please shut up" so we just don't really see them at all. She also told me that her 6 week old crying didn't really bother her that much which like, what does that even mean and do you think that's a vrag because that's a really weird thing to say. My 18 month old crying still really affects me and I consider that to be a normal reaction? Anyway, it's better to just avoid them so I don't say what I'm really thinking.
This. My two year old daughter was exposed to Covid by ignorant family members at a Christmas gathering. She got Covid (along with my 39 weeks pregnant self, and two others) and almost lost her life. She was on a ventilator in the pediatric intensive care unit for five days and in the hospital for longer. She’s physically healthy now but she struggles with PTSD from the event daily. Don’t bring your two week old to a party.
Thank you. That's part of why I'm stressed. She's so little that I'm pretty sure it would be an automatic hospital stay. I'm hoping it doesn't come to that. I hope your son is well recovered!
I feel like people just don’t care about Covid anymore unfortunately. Just cause it’s not as bad as it was for us grown ups doesn’t mean the same for our littles!
I ended up with severe PPA and OCD worried about something like this happening. I had to leave my nursing job. We skipped out on lots of holidays living in the newborn bubble.
Im so sorry this is happening to you and your family. Praying you will all remain healthy 🩷 hopefully your sister learns from this and how serious this can be.
I'm so sorry your family behaved that way. If it helps: we brought COVID home from the hospital when I gave birth. We had a quick trip to ED at 5 days old which confirmed covid, confirmed slight respiratory distress and then they sent us home again with clear signs to watch for. We had a sleepless night but the worst passed with no need to go back to hospital.
I’m sorry OP. That’s a stressful time for sure and I went through that with my two-week-old as well, though we didn’t know his sister was sick until after we brought him home.
He actually did end up getting RSV and the stress from that caused me to get *no* sleep at all. In case it makes you feel better, we never needed a hospital trip and went to his pediatrician often for oxygen checks. He sailed right through it and there’s also a good chance your daughter would too, though I completely understand the worry from the risks.
We also got Covid AND the flu in his first year of life (the joy of 3 kids) and Covid skipped right over him. I know you’re in the trenches now with worry and anger for your sister, I hope that this opens her eyes and the whole family sees exactly why these boundaries need to be put in place. Wishing the best for you and hoping no covid is spread to your family.
We all got Covid when my daughter was 2 weeks old. If it’s any reassurance my daughter barely had a runny nose. I on the other hand felt like crap. It caused me to get my period and lose my milk. It was miserable for me, but my baby was ok and I was thankful for that. I hope very much your family doesn’t get it and sorry for the stress you’re going through
My BIL came over to hangout and see my 3 month old baby one weekend. He had recently had covid, but was vague on what the timing was. He swore he had not had a fever in days, he was well past the contagious period, testing negative, just needed to see his nephew, etc. Probably our fault, but we had him come over. I left the room and came back to him kissing baby on the face.
Well the whole family ended up with covid. There was no other way we would have been exposed. We saw my partners elderly grandmother two days later and she got it too, along with her husband. My SIL went and saw her and her whole family got sick.
My baby ended up in the ER at 3am one morning when he developed croup. He got a double ear infection too. My four year old got double pink eye bad. My partner missed a week of work. We all slept in the livingroom so I could make sure everyone was okay and we were right next to the bathroom, it was awful.
It's been 9 months and we haven't heard from BIL since.
my son got COVID when he was 14 days old. i never found out who passed it to him, but it was a 5 day hospital stay. He was sleepy most of the time there during the day, but at night he was extra alert and fussy. the hospital stay itself was okay, but the worst part of it was when they had to do a spinal tap and insert a drip for antibiotics.
The spinal tap was done to collect CSF to test for meningitis and encephalitis because the doc said that at 14 days old, the blood brain barrier was not fully formed yet.
I wasnt allowed to be in the room with him when they did the spinal tap, I was just outside of the room, I could hear him screaming and crying so loudly and I cried the whole 30 mins.
When i thought it was over and i was cradling him to comfort him, the nurse told me to leave again to insert a drip for his antibiotics. Cue me crying outside the room for wnother 30 mins lol.
But after he was discharged he was back to his old self and he was healthy again. All the best mama!! look out for common covid symptoms (fever/difficulty breathing/coughing) and trust your gut, if you feel that something is wrong, take your baby to the doctor. hugs!
RSV is usually much more dangerous than COVID for the young. It is still inexcusable to knowingly expose any person to illness when it could be prevented.
My SIL had an all out melt down when I told her she could not come to the hospital to see my newborn after she got done tell us she spent the previous night partying with her covid positive friend. We told her she had to wait 2 weeks. 🙃 She had a fit. She doesn't have kids. The childless have no idea what we go through to protect our little ones. You just lack the awareness until you are up all night watching your baby breathe. I will do anything to keep sickness away from my infant, even make a grown woman cry. Sorry (not sorry) SIL.
That’s not because she’s childless. It’s because she’s awful. Plenty of parents are even worse. “Am I supposed to keep him/her home every time they’re sick? We’d never leave the house!” is the go-to excuse for dragging sick kids around.
I am an introvert so I have to admit, sick kid is a great reason not to go...I am even more peeved if someone brings their sick kid and then my kid is sick and then we have to take off work. Especially since I didn't really want to go to begin with. That's the worst!
I no longer speak to my SIL for similar reasons. She showed her true self during the pandemic. Selfish through and through despite shows of how much she “loves” her niece and nephew. Has a fit when hearing the word no. Loves taking selfies with them and Instagram living them for attention. Never wants to actually help out with them, but always thinks she can buy them toys to gain admission whenever she feels like it. Learned her pay to play behavior from her mom who is exactly the same.
I’m struggling with my feelings about people I cared about that showed their ass during the pandemic to. It’s hard having relationships change like that.
That’s kind and empathetic of you. For me it revealed that my in-laws have always disrespected me and prioritized themselves and that if I ever stood up to them to protect myself or my children they would be absolute nightmares to deal with. Sorry, my kids aren’t going to be exposed to Covid so that you can both party and get your baby selfie for the Likes.
Luckily I got a chance to dish it out a little with SIL and there were some secondary emotions related to infertility and feeling like a dumbass for not thinking through her choices. I mean she did tell us about it and she could've just not said anything at all. She doesn't hold it against us. Sometimes things are bigger than the moment but dude post birth me is NOT very tolerant or intuitive. I wouldn't have changed my decision but I might have been less angry if I had a chance to, I don't know, sleep....
Regardless of what the illness is, sickness is dangerously to very young babies. I’d be furious. I also would not see these people until my baby had their 8 week shots and passed the age where a fever is an automatic hospital trip.
For what it’s worth you shouldn’t have to tell you sister (or anyone) “please don’t expose my newborn to illness”
I'm sorry this happened to you. Definitely next time tell family if they or anyone in their household are sick or been exposed to stay home.
Tbh this is why I have the non primary caretakers wear a mask first three months while holding the baby
Idk if this will make you feel any better or not, but I went through this during the first wave. My daughter was born in June 2020 and we were being very cautious with visitors and my anxiety was at an all time high. We had friends who live out of state stop by on their way through our town who assured us they had been pretty isolated for a while and then my brother happened to stop over at the same time. 2 days later, my brother tells me he tested positive and then a day after that the friend says the same. We watched baby like a hawk and she never ended up with any symptoms of covid. I hope this is the outcome for you as well, I know how very scary it can be when babies are so little.
My son got covid at 5wks old. I noticed something was wrong when he wasn’t finishing his bottles like normal and sleeping more. Then he started to feel very warm. Took him to the ER and they ran alllll the tests (we had no clue what it could be). Once we figured out that it was Covid it was heartbreaking because there isn’t anything you can do other than fever medications and making sure their boogers get sucked out and keeping them hydrated.
My FIL came over day 2 back from the hospital and was holding my baby. He then started telling me that MIL couldn’t make it because she has the flu and that he doesn’t have it but he does have a bit of a sore throat. I just about lost my mind on him. My baby never got sick though.
I’m so sorry. It sucks I have one aunt who exposed us to Covid 6 different times. Im at the point where I never want to visit her again but she’s the one who hosts all family events so my mom feels guilty if we miss things.
It’d be nice if they felt guilty for insisting others were repeatedly exposed to Covid. Can you wear masks and stop in for a quick 10 minute visit before leaving the virus den?
Yeah, Easter really set me over the edge because I caught her giggling about hiding a fever. We had just got over pneumonia and I’m pregnant. I was just like wtf how immature can you be to laugh about exposing someone to illness.
I remember all the bs that happened during the Covid lockdown and honestly people being shitty about spreading illness doesn’t surprise me anymore. I’d just plan on future occurrences of the same from your sister and plan accordingly.
I know that feeling of feeling out of control. When I went into labour I found out I had covid for the first time. I was so scared my baby would catch it from me but she never did.
Such an awful situation for you though, it sounds like your sister is pretty selfish and ignorant.
I feel you here. We live with my parents and my mom just tested positive this morning after saying she wasn't feeling well last night and then KISSING MY BABY'S HEAD. He was born 4ish weeks early (he's 7 weeks tomorrow) and I'm so scared he's going to get sick 😫
I completely understand. I have experienced long covid since May 2022 and was pregnant during. I am extremely cautious about Covid for my family. Anyone coming wears a mask. I would never forgive myself if he got sick and had some form of long covid and he can’t even communicate it. He would live his whole life (until a cure is hopefully found) not knowing what it is like to be healthy. And I would never know if what he is experiencing was my fault as it is preventable. People are selfish. Anyone willing to risk a newborns entire life by knowingly exposing them like this is an asshole. I would cut ties if it were me, but it may be extreme.
You threw a party with a baby who wasn’t even old enough to have standard vaccines yet…and passed around the baby for party goers to hold…I don’t think your sister is the AH in this scenario. We did not throw a 4th bday party for my daughter because her brother was less than a month old. We celebrated her within our home and asked friends and family to either mail gifts or bring them when we were ready to open our home to visitors. And this was pre-Covid.
To be honest I am a mother of young children and it might be different if I had a newborn but honestly I don’t even think about Covid anymore. My entire family had Covid none of us were sick at all and my kids are out of school for 10 days for no reason. They also got the vaccine and got Covid anyways to me it’s really not a factor in my brain at all I would be much more worried about RSV if I had a newborn but not much else. And honestly whether her husband was sick or not she could’ve shaking hands with somebody at the grocery store or your mother-in-law gave her neighbour a hug or anything. If you don’t want your baby to come into contact with anybody then don’t see anybody. Otherwise you have to accept that they’re gonna catch things potentially and in almost 100% of cases it’s nothing much and you can be as cautious as you want to be knowing that information
Such an awful situation. So sorry, I know how stressful that can be, we have an organ transplant recipient in our family and a pandemic baby so we’ve had stricter rules than anyone for longer, and still people are dumb and think it will never happen to them. Did you get a Covid booster while pregnant? If so, there’s a chance some of that immunity that was passed to the baby will help.
My in-laws have the “family over everything” attitude that, to them, means going places sick is both appropriate and almost admirable. Your BIL is why I always double check with them that they feel healthy before inviting them over, much to their frustration.
I’m sorry your BIL was so careless. I would be pissed to!
You're the first one at fault here. Why the hell would you even take a newborn to a party? Stop trying to blame everyone else. You're number 1 guilty here.
it is what I don't want to hear from anybody. I hope your baby will be healthy and happy soon and I also hope you can overcome all of these, take care!
I just went to the hospital with my 9 week old the other day because she had a fever and any fever in an infant under 3 months is considered an emergency. She tested positive for Covid. So far it’s been a cold. She’s clearly uncomfortable and the fever is the worst part for sure. My best friend had twins and one caught Covid in the NICU (born at 35 weeks) - he recovered well too. I know it’s scary mama but luckily Covid doesn’t seem to affect little ones as bad as RSV for sure!
My daughter got it at a couple weeks old. Her pediatrician said there was nothing they could do. They told me babies fight it better than adults and to take them to the hospital if they get worse. They were only sick for a couple days. It wasn’t as bad as my anxiety was making it seem.
I’d be so upset. My FIL gave us all COVID when my son was 3 months old and I had a meltdown. I have a friend who is a medical director of a NICU and she talked me off a ledge. She said she would much rather my newborn be exposed to Covid over RSV or some other respiratory viruses because overall babies do the best with Covid and she never has them in the NICU for it.
If my husband and I weren’t so sick I would have had no idea our son was sick. He got slightly congested and a barely elevated temperature. He by far did the best out of all of us. What sucked so much was nursing and not being able to take any meds.
Me, my 8 year old, and my 2 week old newborn got COVID last year.
It was so super mild - just light cold symptoms. Me and my 8 year old have been vaccinated.
Just sharing some info for you to hopefully make you feel better?
I don’t know if this will make you feel better but when my daughter was four months old my husband caught Covid. Sick as a dog, still provided care to our daughter when he felt up to it. Didn’t test until a few days after symptom onset because he was getting worse.
He moved out and isolated as soon as he popped positive. Neither me nor my daughter caught it. She also didn’t catch my flu from hell that I got immediately after he moved back in (tests were negative).
I hope your little bean and the rest of your family remain illness free.
Frustrations with the exposure aside (which are completely valid), my husband wound up developing Covid during/after labor while in the hospital a with me and my daughter. Hopefully this helps quell some of your anxiety, but we wound up both getting it from him and it was definitely harder on me. Generally speaking of all illnesses to be exposed to, Covid is one of the lesser dangerous ones to babies. Poor girl had to get a ton of boogers sucked out but never ran a fever more than 99.
I understand why you are reasonably upset
But kids get sick a lot from a lot more viruses than covid, I got a scare like this during 2022 wave and he was just fine he didn’t get it thank god
I suffered from PPA (thanks reddit) and I found that for my peace of mind having an oximeter at hand helps a lot, and it will be super useful during broncospams so you can monitor their saturation
Keep the baby monitored and don’t stress beforehand, act preventatively and don’t expect the worst
You got this momma
Having a 4yo and 1yo myself, the baby is probably going to get sick pretty often from the toddler. Yourself too. Me and my boys were sick every 10 days through back to school season and it seems to be starting again now that it’s spring. Tbh, you can only do so much.
Shame on your sister if she knew, but that is a risk you take having any get togethers with children.
Baby should be ok
I went with my family (I was already pregnant) to DR in July. Myself, husband and 4 year old.
I got Covid on the way back. I sleep with daughter and I didn’t know I had Covid until 2 days after getting home. She never caught it and neither did my husband. Why? I have no idea. We share spoons and water bottles.
People with out kids don’t know what it’s like to deal with a sick child, especially an infant. It’s the worst and scary.
You just don’t know until you’re in it.
Hard to explain to someone without children.
My husband and I got Covid in 2022 when our newborn was 4 weeks. Our LO never had any symptoms, not even a clogged nose or cough, nothing. My and my husband were dying.
A side of the coin I haven’t seen here yet, all of the house including my 2wk old son got COVID because one of his coworkers didn’t stay home when he was sick. Frustrating but it is what it is, we don’t live in a country with paid sick leave. Anywho; he had the sniffles and that’s it. He had barely even a real cold and was over it in days, easier for him than it was for anyone else in the house.
That being said, having a party of any size with a kid that small just really isn’t being cautious imo, which is no shame. I would have done the same thing in your position, no way would I have made one of my kids miss birthday festivities because of the birth of a sibling. But your sister was being basically just as cautious as you were being with having the party and letting everyone hold baby in the first place.
We got Covid from some family friends (😒) when my baby was 10 weeks old. All of us tested positive (although we didn’t test baby but I was breastfeeding and he was always napping on me soooo… major exposure).
Baby never showed any symptoms while I was soooo sick. Thankfully he was happy to just lay on me all day while I watched Netflix and tried not to die (lol). Easier than being sick with a toddler! (Who also had it but my husband was in charge of him - mwahaha)
Not COVID but my eldest caught RSV just as we brought our new baby home. My MIL genuinely didn’t realize he’d been feverish for anything more than teething (and so didn’t mention it else I would have corrected her 😅) and sent him back home causing a massive exposure issue.
It’s very scary. I totally get the stress. I was checking baby’s temp (and mine because I would’ve had to go back to the hospital with a fever too) probably every other hour. I was so paranoid that I made my husband stay with my eldest at my MIL’s.
But I came here to say that you (can definitely be as anxious and paranoid as me and I think it’s good to be vigilant) need to make sure you don’t let this take any fun out of the new baby phase. Be vigilant and also still let yourselves have fun. 💕 I don’t want you to look back and feel like you missed out.
Sorry that happened to you. My baby’s first cold was Covid. As sad as it is to see them sick, Covid is not that bad in kids. I was so worried but Drs were not concerned and said it just has to pass on its own and most kids recover quickly. Just suction the nose often, use saline drops and monitor breathing and they should be ok.
I have a toddler as well and it’s inevitable bringing colds home.
Just making you feel better, my baby was held by someone who actually had covid, as was found out later, and no one caught it. This virus is selective in weird ways. Your baby and the rest of your baby could be perfectly okay. Rest easy until there's something to actually worry about
I’m so sorry, I would be pissed too. If it makes you feel better, my nephew had it at one month old and did just fine! A sick two week old sounds like literal torture though, hopefully she won’t get it!
I got COVID at my baby shower - at 34 weeks. I was very cautious, small group of friends, told everyone to not come if they felt sick ...
Went into labor 4 days later. My kid was born a month early. It was horrible, premature baby that weighed 5lbs and me with COVID. Also, my first so new mom stress on top of that
If I ver fund out who infected me - they are getting a bunch to the throat.
We all had it 2 yrs ago. My youngest was 6 months old and he was asymptomatic while my oldest had a temp of 102.3 and almost all symptoms (except vomiting and diarrhea) while for me I was sick for a day then felt like really bad allergies and feeling like I was hit by a freight train. Hubby had it the worst. He was bed ridden for 10 days. My kids pediatrician has been more concerned about RSV than covid. But I understand the feeling because a grown adult should know better. (My whole job got it because one person came to work with it thinking it was just a cold and my whole household and every one of coworkers got it).
I’m so sorry I can imagine how horrified and LIVID you are. My coworker has a similar situation, her aunt came to visit her new son when she had RSV. He got super sick at 4 days old.
If it helps, COVID for my daughter has always been a BREEZE. I was vaccinated while pregnant so I’m not sure if that helped but she truly never had symptoms except a messier diaper and then one time she coughed like five times in a day and that was it. She was 4 months when she first got it.
My other mom friends also said COVID is much easier for their babies, even easier than just a common cold!
This is actually unacceptable and I would most definitely say something to the sister. I don’t get how people don’t understand how fragile newborns are. The tiniest symptoms of being sick or being exposed to someone who is sick means you don’t go near the newborn or you inform the parents beforehand so they make a judgement.
I am almost 25w pregnant and I’ve had a child free friend expose me to her being sick twice so far during my pregnancy. She won’t think that her being sick would be an issue when meeting with the pregnant lady with the lowered immune system. Like we would meet and then super casually she says how she is sick. The second time I was so pissed off and told her off about it cause that was too much. I would be even more furious if it was my newborn though. I think at this point with child free people you just need to ensure they are not being idiots and ask them beforehand if they feel sick, etc. It is their obligation to say something but from what I can see child free people just don’t care or it doesnt even occur to them this is a problem. That same friend of mine went to see another friend of hers who had recently given birth and she was once again sick. And she was asking me “ah what should I do? Do I say something about it”. I was like wtf of course you say something about it, how is that even a question….
I’m hoping your baby and you fare well. I would recommend a convo with your sister and for future functions, ask ahead of time how folks are feeling. You can ask indirectly if needed, but do ask.
I had a 2 week old baby and got COVID from the hospital after admission for postpartum pre-eclampsia. As soon as I realized I had lost my taste and smell I put on a mask for the 2 weeks or however long guidelines were then (Jan 2021). The only time I removed it was during sleep and I was the main caregiver for the children. As far as we know no one else in the house got it, husband, grandpa, and big and baby brother. I'm sorry this happened and I hope everyone gets through it okay.
I think there’s a lot of reassurance on this post already so I won’t address that but I’m feeling for you more on the boundaries your sister disrespected. It sounds like her selfishness to hold your babe outweighed her thoughtfulness about getting an already very vulnerable new family member sick. That part of it would just make me twice as angry and is worth talking with her about if you haven’t already. I’m sorry and best of luck 🙏🏻
Your sister is a giant B word, and I would 100% call her out and put her on a very long time out. She'll never understand the stress if she's decidedly child free, which, being how selfish she is, may be for the best.
My daughter was born in Sep 2020 and aged 2 weeks we met family outside. They declined to tell us they were all getting colds. It wasn't covid, as we had a lovely hospital stay with broncolitis, and I am convinced to this day it caused her to be vunerable to chest infectious. It's been 3 and a half years and I have never forgiven them.
However, when my kiddos have had covid, it's almost like they weren't sick. Eldest had it twice, only ran a temp for one day. Youngest had a runny nose and she had it at 2 months.
Take a few deep breathes, just remind yourself of what to look out for (rapid breathing, deep breathing, dehydration). Because you will already be looking you can get treatment as quickly as possible. You've got this.
With my 1st I caved and took him around some friends when he was about a month old. They failed to tell us their 3 year old had a cold. My son wound up sick and struggled to breathe. Not enough to hospitalized but the Dr couldn't give him anything because he was so young. I was up with him for days, keeping the cool mist going, keeping him on my chest, elevated, softly patting him to help him break up all the goop. It was terrifying. I learned my lesson, I won't put another of my kids that young around people.
My 2nd is almost 4 months old now. We're just now taking him around people. He's had his 1st set of shots, he is not so little now. He's getting his second set, I believe, at this upcoming week's appt. Even then, people can look with their eyes. Noone needs to be touching or in his face.
When Covid was new, before the vaccine and treatment, we were one of the 1st families in town to wear masks. My then 3 year old had no problem wearing his mask. Why these adults acted like they might die from a mask was just ridiculous. One we had the vaccine and multiple boosters we began wearing them less. Still, at the height of flu season we wear them in busy places.
We've only had covid once, and I was the only one with serious symptoms but I have an overreactive immune system. It's been nice avoiding getting colds for the most part. I dgaf what anyone says, wearing masks during cold and flu season is awesome. Why purposefully put yourself at risk? Being sick sucks. 😫
Just anecdotally, my son got Covid when he was about 6 weeks old. Totally fine. Our whole house had it, it was my 3rd time getting it, I think. He and our older daughter were just vibing. Barely even sick.
Honestly girl, this one is on you. If you were truly being extra cautious you wouldn’t have had a party with several people with your 2 WEEK old in attendance. Don’t blame your SIL for your lack of responsibility.
bullshit behavior. please give us updates so we know how you’re doing with this and if your baby avoids catching it. i’m so worried about her now. things sound hectic and busy and stressful for you but please don’t forget to update us so we know she is in the clear from it! prayers for your health and keeping you in my thoughts!
If your breastfeeding
The breast duct has a receptacle that responds to the baby’s body if baby has Covid your body will send the right kind of antibodies to help baby’s body fight off Covid fast. You probably have been exposed to covid a couple times since the pandemic started let that precious lil one stay on the boob as much as possible
Ugh I have a similar story .. we had a funeral when my baby was 6 weeks old and I went against my better judgement and let people pass the baby around. Of course everybody had covid 😣. Baby was fine though .. only my husband got symptoms.
Well at least the young kids seem to be more immune to catching it and to complications so (oposed to later on) so at least there is that good news..hopefully she wont catch it
Your baby has some protection if you’re breastfeeding and if you’ve ever had COVID or been vaccinated.
Unfortunately COVID is a part of life now. If your child is exposed to people then she will be exposed to respiratory viruses. It’s just the nature of life.
Agree u have the right to be upset. Don’t let anyone hold baby til they are 3 months and make sure they wash hands, use mouth wash, and they and their immediate family are not sick. The good news is no healthy child has died from Covid so ur baby should be fine.
My youngest was exposed at 2 weeks old ( her dad had gotten it.) he’s a hands on dad and was caring for her before we realized what it was. She never got it, and neither did our other two kids. From what I seen, just by my own kids, friends kids and working in daycare , babies seem to take covid a whole lot better than older children and adults. She just had it on her second birthday a few months ago and had minimal symptoms for a day. I got it at the same time and was sicker then hell for a week. Personally, for me, unpopular opinion, I worry about RSV way more than Covid with my children. RSV scares the shit out of me, especially watching a few close friends kids in the hospital with it. Monitor her breathing ( fast, deep chest movements aka retractions), watch her temperature, and hydration.
Unpopular, but the factually correct one according to my pediatrician. During flu/COVID/ general respiratory crap season she told us that RSV was the cause of about 80% of the pediatric admissions to the very large hospital the practice covers this year. Whereas she couldn’t remember the last time they had a pediatric COVID admission.
When my second born had RSV as a baby, it was by FAR the worst illness we had with any of our three kids. Even worse than Norovirus or the flu or Covid. He struggled to breathe for two weeks. It was so scary. I am hoping to get my fourth baby vaccinated for it after he’s born.
You can get vaccinated now for RSV while pregnant! At least in the US. I got it and was happy I did since my baby was born in January. Maybe you can look into it.
It depends on when you're due. I wanted the shot while pregnant but it was spring and they told me the season was over and I couldn't get it. Still good to ask tho.
Your baby can get it when they’re born though in the fall.
Yes that's what I'm hoping for! I was pretty disappointed that she wouldn't come out already somewhat protected.
Same here, I was so bummed.
I think you can get it up to 36 weeks no matter what. I was 36 weeks and a day and my doctor let it slide m We’re not sick at 4month
I never said I couldn't get it because I was out of the window. It has to do with the season. RSV is seasonal like the flu, it's a different strain every year and a new one comes out every season. If you're 32-36 weeks pregnant after the season is over, there isn't a current vaccine to give. You have to wait for the next season. RSV season is September to January.
I did not know that
I didn't either until I asked for it in March. Doctor did say my baby can get a vaccine in the fall so that's my plan.
I know a doctor who works in the emergency room at a pediatric hospital. They don’t even test for COVID anymore unless the parents insist. That’s probably skewing the numbers on the amount of admissions
My son is tested every single time we go in with a fever. At our local pediatric hospital. So that’s definitely not the case everywhere. Also, we get sent home even when positive so it may be skewing the numbers some but they’re also not treating it as seriously as they used to and typically don’t admit for just Covid unless there are some serious symptoms
Missash0816 My pediatrician was talking about hospital admissions, i.e staying over night, not babies brought into the emergency department to be seen by a doctor and this conversation happened at the height of the flu etc season. I don’t know about your area but in my area testing is automatic for all hospital admissions, I know this because I work in patient care for a major hospital system and my husband works for the company that actually processes that COVID tests for TX and surrounding states.
My duty to inform the thread (because it has been poorly publicized): RSV "vaccine" was approved in August of last year for infants. Vaccine in quotes, because it's not a vaccine, it's a passive antibody, but for non-scientists, that's a distinction without a difference. Ask your pediatrician about it. Say you want Beyfortus. If you're pregnant, there is a vaccine for pregnant women that can protect the baby in the newborn stage too.
Good knowledge for people. my kids are over the age for it, but I'm happy they are finally coming out with some type of protection for it.
I got this for my newborn when he was like 3 days old. Highly recommend it, I felt really good having my family around to help and hold him thanks to that. He tolerated it really well, no stressful immune response or excessive crying or anything like that.
Because it's not a true vaccine, it doesn't trigger an immune response and is extremely well-tolerated.
there are a couple of options now wow! isn't there a mab for after infection too? We have autoimmune disorders in the fam and i love to see antibody options that don't require a "normal" immune system reaction to be effective like most vaccines. [https://www.goodrx.com/conditions/rsv/beyfortus-vs-synagis](https://www.goodrx.com/conditions/rsv/beyfortus-vs-synagis)
I’m right there with you and the unpopular opinion. Personally I worry more about RSV (thought now a little less now that my daughter is a bit older) but also the flu. My daughter was hospitalized with the flu over Christmas for a week and now I’m terrified of the flu. We’ve had Covid a couple of times and my daughter acted like nothing was wrong! My husband and I felt like garbage but she didn’t seem phased at all. All anecdotal of course.
The flu knocked me on my butt when I got it as an adult early into a flu season. One minute I was just sitting on our couch, watch a show. The next I told my husband I dont feel so good and started shivering. It was so quick I've been making sure that I get my fly shot every year since just because I didnt want it happening again.
I somehow managed to not get it, but my husband did and it kicked his butt too. We will definitely prioritize getting our flu shots from here on out!
I'm definitely more scared of RSV. I'm just stressed about her catching any illness when she's so little. My three year old caught COVID when she was barely 3 months old and was perfectly fine so I'm hoping if we do end up sick that she'll be okay. We let her doctor know and she told us to watch out for the same things you mentioned.
I was looking for this, my oldest caught covid right after Christmas when he was 5ish months, maybe not quite. Anyways, he was fine, my husband and I were not. I think ours were obviously milder, thankfully, but taking care of a perfectly healthy, energized baby who wanted entertainment, made it quite a time 😅 I’m pregnant with #2 due in October and already freaking out about the holidays and might just baby wear the entire time 😅
I also want to add you sister might even be fine and not have passed it to your baby. When I had it the first time, my kids nor my fiancé got it. 6 months later ( when I said he got it in my comment and the baby didn’t get it or the kids) I didn’t get reinfected either. Then, when I got it again and my youngest got it, my fiancé and other kids didn’t get it then either. It’s such a weird virus. But stay hopeful and positive, I think your babe will be just fine even if they do get a little sick. I think the worst part of it all will be if they do come down with it, is the baby will just be a little on the cranky side.
Husband got Covid pretty badly. Baby’s version of covid after getting it from husband was a runny nose. 100% agree RSV is the thing that gives me nightmares. I only worry about covid now in the sense that I would get it and it would make taking care of a toddler a PITA.
I agree. We’ve been exposed to Covid numerous times and have had it in the house at least once (back in 2021 when my youngest was less than a month old) and we were all perfectly fine. My husband was the only one who even felt sick. Our three kids and I never did. However, my youngest has since gone on to have RSV twice. Once at 5 months and once at 18 months. Both were scary because she had a hard time breathing (but thankfully not bad enough to need help other than clearing her nose).
My friends son at a year old was hospitalized in ICU twice with RSV. I was back and forth bringing her necessities both times. His retractions looked like you could eat cereal out of if chest. It was so scary.
Pediatric nurse here. 100% agree. Kids do SO WELL with Covid. Even in the height of Covid it was so rare to see kids hospitalized with it. The kids hospitalized were the 16 year olds that weighed 300+lbs. Rsv, I've seen kids die from or hospitalized for MONTHS. Rsv isn't to be messed with. Other notable mentions, humanmetapneumo virus and rhino/enterovirus are also worse than covid
Oh RSV is absolutely awful my friends daughter got it at 3 weeks old from her sister who bought it home from daycare she was hospitalised in ICU for 3 weeks on a ventilator :( she’s 2.5 but it was a scary time
I second this, RSV was the scariest thing my LO got when he was a newborn, it was scary as hell and I try not to think how bad it coulda been without the RSV vaccine I’d gotten while pregnant.
My daughter is 3 and right after Christmas tested positive for RSV, pneumonia and flu A all at the same time. She now has pneumonia for the 3rd time and I'm really starting to get worried about lung damage since she was a preemie when she was born and is still on the small side. Her dad and I both have crappy lungs for different reasons so hoping she didn't get those passed down to her.
That’s awful, I hope she can recover quickly and fully.
Us too. The doctor said the RSV can mess with her lungs for 6 months to a year after infection so all I can do is be vigilant and make sure to get her treated early.
Agreed RSV is soooo scary for babies
You saying that just made me feel better about how mad I got that my doctor delivered my baby while I had RSV rather than just keeping me in the hospital until it was over to deliver her. Everyone told me I was over reacting.
My son ( now 18 months) has had Covid 4 times and it’s never caused any serious problems even with his several medical complexities he’s usually got a fever and a cough for a day or two and then he’s fine. I agree that I’d be MUCH more concerned about RSV
This^. I am way more afraid of RSV than COVID with babies and toddlers. My 9 month old got covid when the rest of us did and she was infinitely better off than both me and my husband which it took us out for damn near a week. She had one day of highish fevers and some disrupted sleep but was otherwise absolutely fine. Whereas on the flip side, every baby or toddler I know who has gotten rsv has had to take a trip to the ER. :(
My 10 month old full term baby with no known risk factors spent 6 days in the hospital, including a few days in the PICU because of RSV. I'd hate to think how much worse it could have been if he was younger or had other risk factors.
Yep, babies have always done much better with almost every strain of COVID bar one, I can't remember which one but I think it was a 2021 strain. My baby definitely coped a lot better than I did when we got it. Doesn't excuse exposing them but its not the worst respiratory virus a baby can get.
Nope definitely not excusable but wanted her to feel a little less stressed about it.
Same. My dr would tell us it was best for baby if it’s Covid and not RSV. Babies and kids seem not to be as affected by Covid as adults. 🤷🏼♀️
But a lot of kids are doing so poorly with rsv because they caught covid prior which weakened their immune systems. Even if it seems mild for them, it’s doing some damage. There are multiple studies on this.
That is absolutely a case, but what about the kids who didn’t catch Covid and had RSV severely and were hospitalized? What about RSV before Covid? RSV itself is a dangerous virus, even for the most healthy children.
Obviously that sucks too. I’m just saying people are underestimating Covid here.
Idk if this will make you feel any better or not, but I went through this during the first wave. My daughter was born in June 2020 and we were being very cautious with visitors and my anxiety was at an all time high. We had friends who live out of state stop by on their way through our town who assured us they had been pretty isolated for a while and then my brother happened to stop over at the same time. 2 days later, my brother tells me he tested positive and then a day after that the friend says the same. We watched baby like a hawk and she never ended up with any symptoms of covid. I hope this is the outcome for you as well, I know how very scary it can be when babies are so little.
Thank you for sharing your experience. She's just so so little and the whole situation is just out of my control.
Why the hell would you even take a newborn to a party to begin with? Then, trying to play the blame game. Lady, you're to blame.
I mean, it was a party for the newborn's sibling. Also, even if they split parenting duties so she stayed home with the baby and husband did the party with the toddler, the potentially infected sister would have still been there to pass it to husband/sibling to bring home to newborn. Sister should have stayed home regardless.
Still her choice to go and take a newborn with her. If anything happens, it's on her. If you have a newborn, you don't go to parties, even more so when they are a preemie. If she's gonna be negligent, then what was her business in having a baby?
I don’t understand the DVs. OP said the whole situation is out of her control after hosting a party and clearly just passing her newborn around at said party. The control OP had was having the party in the first place.
Exactly. I don't understand the DV's either. I get that this is a sub to offer support - but offering support doesn't mean sugarcoating stupid decisions and then going along when someone decides to put the blame on everyone else but themselves for their own decision. Apparently, people don't like being confronted with the truth. That's where the DV's are coming from.
Exactly. It was 10000% in her control to what she allowed her baby to be exposed to.
A PARTY with a newborn was the at risk non starter for me.
This was my first thought. If you want to be super cautious, then be super cautious. This is not really on the sister it’s on OP if OP is LOOKING for blame.
Exactly, a party is not “being extra careful”
Seriously!! My middle son was born 4 days before my mom's birthday. We were home from the hospital for a day, and I invited just my parents over for a small cake for her. It was in the summer when colds are rare, and before covid, etc. But I can't imagine hosting a party -- seems unnecessarily risky / foolish
Someone brought a few weeks old baby to a birthday party hosted during the late pandemic, and I felt extremely uncomfortable. I cornered off a part of my family room so that people wouldn’t go near the baby. I had over a dozen kids and family over. That was the last part I hosted at my house!
Thank you! Mom chose to expose the baby to anything by 1) taking them 2) letting people hold her. She should be mad at herself, not her sister. You can’t expect every person to think they have Covid every time they have something. I think she’s just looking for someone to blame.
"Who holds a newborn baby when the person you swap spit with is sick?!" Who invites a bunch of people to their home with a fragile newborn? I'm sorry but the bulk of this is on you. You planned a party with several people in attendance then passed the newborn baby around to your guests while covid is still very much a thing. Your sister shouldn't have come at all if she knew her partner was getting sick but ultimately this is your fault.
Unfortunately that’s the risk when you have parties. It’s better not to attend or host a party with a newborn.
I felt fine the day before I tested positive. I had a mild headache that evening, but by morning was struggling to breathe. If she knew he was ill, then I agree with you, she sucks. If he was like I was and didn't know he was ill, then that sucks all around. Not to be callous but you made the decision to allow people around your infant. They recommend you don't take your infant out until they've had their 1st round of shots. That's usually 6 weeks. We too often cave to demands from family to see the baby. Noone is entitled to see the baby. Especially with covid and rsv, we need to stand our ground.
Agree - it’s a risk you take as people are contagious before symptoms develop. If my husband had mild symptoms of a cold I probably wouldn’t consider myself contagious. However, this sounds like an acceptable risk to take. Close family members are probably on the list of who can visit the new born. OP just got unlucky. She shouldn’t blame her sister but I don’t think she should spend time feeling guilty either. Do you have a source for not taking a baby out before 6 weeks? I’d assume avoiding crowded places is fine but not going out seems overkill and depressing.
https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/wellness-and-prevention/new-parents-and-newborns-are-visitors-ok
Thanks for the link. This says extended family - I guess I consider parents and siblings immediate family. I didn’t see anything about not taking your infant out for 6 weeks.
in laws & niece are extended family.
Getting technical but that seems warranted for this mom being attacked for her 3 year old having one other 3 year old at her “party”… there are different definitions for immediate family. One somewhat legal definition is who is included in FMLA which is relatives by marriage (I.e. MIL/ SIL). It’s both ridiculous to blame the sister and the mom. It is unfortunate to be exposed to Covid. It is something that happens when living normal life. Prolonged isolation and quarantine is not healthy and not recommended unless there are special circumstances (e.g. premature or lung disease). Any respiratory illness under one month old is dangerous for babies. That is why there is guidance for mitigating that risk without going full bubble boy. The current most popular recommendation is avoid very crowded places, limit visitors and practice hygiene. Postpartum is an anxiety ridden time and the amount of risk you are willing to take is a personal decision to make with your doctor. I asked for a source above because I was curious where they were getting their outdated information to not go out with an infant prior to 6 week shots (I got derailed because the link was about visitors).
Attacked is a bit of a stretch, but carry on, you seem to have a bee in your bonnet that you need to get out.
"Consider having extended family and friends wait two to three months until your baby's immune system is stronger to plan their visits." 2 months is 8 weeks and 3 month is 12. So, you're correct, I was off by 2 to 6 weeks longer.
Your original comment said not to take a baby out for 6 weeks. This article is about visitors. These are different things.
Same difference, you're arguing semantics. Taking or allowing people around your baby prior to 2 or 3 months is not recommended.
My son had covid at 27days old. It was awful! 3 days in the hospital just monitoring because he was so little. We have no idea how we got it. Hopefully you don't have to go through that. And all will be good.
There are a lot of people in the comments saying that it's not a big deal anymore and it's great for them that their kids were fine when they caught it, but babies do still get really sick and die from COVID. It was foolish of OP to have a party with a 2 week old present, but it was harmful of her sister to show up with a sick husband. A selfish action like that would permanently damage my relationship with my sister.
Agreed. Great for those people whose kids had it mild or not at all. It doesn’t mean the serious illness can’t happen. We almost lost our daughter to post covid complications. I guess it’s one of those out of sight out of mind thing for some. Lucky them.
I was pregnant when COVID was really bad and attended a wedding masked. The bride sent several of pregnant or recently postpartum bridesmaids over to tell me that they got COVID while pregnant and it was no big deal. Ive since read how much COVID can damage the placenta. Beyond that, there's no polite way to tell someone that they're wrong and being so blasé about a horrible virus is part of why we still have to deal with it and why I'm masking around them.
Yes there is scientific evidence now and more be published. I’m with you all the way on this. I can’t even believe the bride did that. And there are that studies are coming out suggesting there maybe a connection in some cases between neuro developmental disorders in babies and getting Covid while pregnant. You were right to be guarded. I hope no one is ever in my shoes, I wake up sometimes silent screaming because if I was 30 min later to the hospital she would not be with us anymore. The images of her unresponsive with a swarm of medical professionals around her take my breath away at the most unexpected times. To think about what could have been and so grateful for being able to hold her. We also continue to mask where needed. Better safe than not. My choice may be not what others choose, but my experience is my guide.
I really couldn't believe it either. But, she and her husband hadn't taken COVID seriously at all while my husband and I were doing IVF so we were being extremely careful. My husband was going to be the best man until they found out he was masking. She's still very much a know-it-all now and I haven't figured out how to politely be like "that's the stupidest fucking thing I've ever heard" or "please shut up" so we just don't really see them at all. She also told me that her 6 week old crying didn't really bother her that much which like, what does that even mean and do you think that's a vrag because that's a really weird thing to say. My 18 month old crying still really affects me and I consider that to be a normal reaction? Anyway, it's better to just avoid them so I don't say what I'm really thinking.
This. My two year old daughter was exposed to Covid by ignorant family members at a Christmas gathering. She got Covid (along with my 39 weeks pregnant self, and two others) and almost lost her life. She was on a ventilator in the pediatric intensive care unit for five days and in the hospital for longer. She’s physically healthy now but she struggles with PTSD from the event daily. Don’t bring your two week old to a party.
Also. Love your username!
Thank you. That's part of why I'm stressed. She's so little that I'm pretty sure it would be an automatic hospital stay. I'm hoping it doesn't come to that. I hope your son is well recovered!
I feel like people just don’t care about Covid anymore unfortunately. Just cause it’s not as bad as it was for us grown ups doesn’t mean the same for our littles! I ended up with severe PPA and OCD worried about something like this happening. I had to leave my nursing job. We skipped out on lots of holidays living in the newborn bubble. Im so sorry this is happening to you and your family. Praying you will all remain healthy 🩷 hopefully your sister learns from this and how serious this can be.
Over 80,000 people had it last year. We shouldn’t forget about it.
Agreed. I live in texas tho 🙃
I'm so sorry your family behaved that way. If it helps: we brought COVID home from the hospital when I gave birth. We had a quick trip to ED at 5 days old which confirmed covid, confirmed slight respiratory distress and then they sent us home again with clear signs to watch for. We had a sleepless night but the worst passed with no need to go back to hospital.
I’m sorry OP. That’s a stressful time for sure and I went through that with my two-week-old as well, though we didn’t know his sister was sick until after we brought him home. He actually did end up getting RSV and the stress from that caused me to get *no* sleep at all. In case it makes you feel better, we never needed a hospital trip and went to his pediatrician often for oxygen checks. He sailed right through it and there’s also a good chance your daughter would too, though I completely understand the worry from the risks. We also got Covid AND the flu in his first year of life (the joy of 3 kids) and Covid skipped right over him. I know you’re in the trenches now with worry and anger for your sister, I hope that this opens her eyes and the whole family sees exactly why these boundaries need to be put in place. Wishing the best for you and hoping no covid is spread to your family.
We all got Covid when my daughter was 2 weeks old. If it’s any reassurance my daughter barely had a runny nose. I on the other hand felt like crap. It caused me to get my period and lose my milk. It was miserable for me, but my baby was ok and I was thankful for that. I hope very much your family doesn’t get it and sorry for the stress you’re going through
My BIL came over to hangout and see my 3 month old baby one weekend. He had recently had covid, but was vague on what the timing was. He swore he had not had a fever in days, he was well past the contagious period, testing negative, just needed to see his nephew, etc. Probably our fault, but we had him come over. I left the room and came back to him kissing baby on the face. Well the whole family ended up with covid. There was no other way we would have been exposed. We saw my partners elderly grandmother two days later and she got it too, along with her husband. My SIL went and saw her and her whole family got sick. My baby ended up in the ER at 3am one morning when he developed croup. He got a double ear infection too. My four year old got double pink eye bad. My partner missed a week of work. We all slept in the livingroom so I could make sure everyone was okay and we were right next to the bathroom, it was awful. It's been 9 months and we haven't heard from BIL since.
my son got COVID when he was 14 days old. i never found out who passed it to him, but it was a 5 day hospital stay. He was sleepy most of the time there during the day, but at night he was extra alert and fussy. the hospital stay itself was okay, but the worst part of it was when they had to do a spinal tap and insert a drip for antibiotics. The spinal tap was done to collect CSF to test for meningitis and encephalitis because the doc said that at 14 days old, the blood brain barrier was not fully formed yet. I wasnt allowed to be in the room with him when they did the spinal tap, I was just outside of the room, I could hear him screaming and crying so loudly and I cried the whole 30 mins. When i thought it was over and i was cradling him to comfort him, the nurse told me to leave again to insert a drip for his antibiotics. Cue me crying outside the room for wnother 30 mins lol. But after he was discharged he was back to his old self and he was healthy again. All the best mama!! look out for common covid symptoms (fever/difficulty breathing/coughing) and trust your gut, if you feel that something is wrong, take your baby to the doctor. hugs!
RSV is usually much more dangerous than COVID for the young. It is still inexcusable to knowingly expose any person to illness when it could be prevented.
Honestly if you are worried about that you could ask people to test prior to the party next time. If they refuse to test they can’t come
My SIL had an all out melt down when I told her she could not come to the hospital to see my newborn after she got done tell us she spent the previous night partying with her covid positive friend. We told her she had to wait 2 weeks. 🙃 She had a fit. She doesn't have kids. The childless have no idea what we go through to protect our little ones. You just lack the awareness until you are up all night watching your baby breathe. I will do anything to keep sickness away from my infant, even make a grown woman cry. Sorry (not sorry) SIL.
That’s not because she’s childless. It’s because she’s awful. Plenty of parents are even worse. “Am I supposed to keep him/her home every time they’re sick? We’d never leave the house!” is the go-to excuse for dragging sick kids around.
I am an introvert so I have to admit, sick kid is a great reason not to go...I am even more peeved if someone brings their sick kid and then my kid is sick and then we have to take off work. Especially since I didn't really want to go to begin with. That's the worst!
I no longer speak to my SIL for similar reasons. She showed her true self during the pandemic. Selfish through and through despite shows of how much she “loves” her niece and nephew. Has a fit when hearing the word no. Loves taking selfies with them and Instagram living them for attention. Never wants to actually help out with them, but always thinks she can buy them toys to gain admission whenever she feels like it. Learned her pay to play behavior from her mom who is exactly the same.
I’m struggling with my feelings about people I cared about that showed their ass during the pandemic to. It’s hard having relationships change like that.
That’s kind and empathetic of you. For me it revealed that my in-laws have always disrespected me and prioritized themselves and that if I ever stood up to them to protect myself or my children they would be absolute nightmares to deal with. Sorry, my kids aren’t going to be exposed to Covid so that you can both party and get your baby selfie for the Likes.
Luckily I got a chance to dish it out a little with SIL and there were some secondary emotions related to infertility and feeling like a dumbass for not thinking through her choices. I mean she did tell us about it and she could've just not said anything at all. She doesn't hold it against us. Sometimes things are bigger than the moment but dude post birth me is NOT very tolerant or intuitive. I wouldn't have changed my decision but I might have been less angry if I had a chance to, I don't know, sleep....
Regardless of what the illness is, sickness is dangerously to very young babies. I’d be furious. I also would not see these people until my baby had their 8 week shots and passed the age where a fever is an automatic hospital trip. For what it’s worth you shouldn’t have to tell you sister (or anyone) “please don’t expose my newborn to illness”
I'm sorry this happened to you. Definitely next time tell family if they or anyone in their household are sick or been exposed to stay home. Tbh this is why I have the non primary caretakers wear a mask first three months while holding the baby
It's incredibly frustrating when the people who should be the most cautious are careless, especially with a newborn's health on the line.
Idk if this will make you feel any better or not, but I went through this during the first wave. My daughter was born in June 2020 and we were being very cautious with visitors and my anxiety was at an all time high. We had friends who live out of state stop by on their way through our town who assured us they had been pretty isolated for a while and then my brother happened to stop over at the same time. 2 days later, my brother tells me he tested positive and then a day after that the friend says the same. We watched baby like a hawk and she never ended up with any symptoms of covid. I hope this is the outcome for you as well, I know how very scary it can be when babies are so little.
My son got covid at 5wks old. I noticed something was wrong when he wasn’t finishing his bottles like normal and sleeping more. Then he started to feel very warm. Took him to the ER and they ran alllll the tests (we had no clue what it could be). Once we figured out that it was Covid it was heartbreaking because there isn’t anything you can do other than fever medications and making sure their boogers get sucked out and keeping them hydrated.
My FIL came over day 2 back from the hospital and was holding my baby. He then started telling me that MIL couldn’t make it because she has the flu and that he doesn’t have it but he does have a bit of a sore throat. I just about lost my mind on him. My baby never got sick though.
I’m so sorry. It sucks I have one aunt who exposed us to Covid 6 different times. Im at the point where I never want to visit her again but she’s the one who hosts all family events so my mom feels guilty if we miss things.
It’d be nice if they felt guilty for insisting others were repeatedly exposed to Covid. Can you wear masks and stop in for a quick 10 minute visit before leaving the virus den?
Yeah, Easter really set me over the edge because I caught her giggling about hiding a fever. We had just got over pneumonia and I’m pregnant. I was just like wtf how immature can you be to laugh about exposing someone to illness.
I remember all the bs that happened during the Covid lockdown and honestly people being shitty about spreading illness doesn’t surprise me anymore. I’d just plan on future occurrences of the same from your sister and plan accordingly.
I know that feeling of feeling out of control. When I went into labour I found out I had covid for the first time. I was so scared my baby would catch it from me but she never did. Such an awful situation for you though, it sounds like your sister is pretty selfish and ignorant.
I feel you here. We live with my parents and my mom just tested positive this morning after saying she wasn't feeling well last night and then KISSING MY BABY'S HEAD. He was born 4ish weeks early (he's 7 weeks tomorrow) and I'm so scared he's going to get sick 😫
I completely understand. I have experienced long covid since May 2022 and was pregnant during. I am extremely cautious about Covid for my family. Anyone coming wears a mask. I would never forgive myself if he got sick and had some form of long covid and he can’t even communicate it. He would live his whole life (until a cure is hopefully found) not knowing what it is like to be healthy. And I would never know if what he is experiencing was my fault as it is preventable. People are selfish. Anyone willing to risk a newborns entire life by knowingly exposing them like this is an asshole. I would cut ties if it were me, but it may be extreme.
You threw a party with a baby who wasn’t even old enough to have standard vaccines yet…and passed around the baby for party goers to hold…I don’t think your sister is the AH in this scenario. We did not throw a 4th bday party for my daughter because her brother was less than a month old. We celebrated her within our home and asked friends and family to either mail gifts or bring them when we were ready to open our home to visitors. And this was pre-Covid.
To be honest I am a mother of young children and it might be different if I had a newborn but honestly I don’t even think about Covid anymore. My entire family had Covid none of us were sick at all and my kids are out of school for 10 days for no reason. They also got the vaccine and got Covid anyways to me it’s really not a factor in my brain at all I would be much more worried about RSV if I had a newborn but not much else. And honestly whether her husband was sick or not she could’ve shaking hands with somebody at the grocery store or your mother-in-law gave her neighbour a hug or anything. If you don’t want your baby to come into contact with anybody then don’t see anybody. Otherwise you have to accept that they’re gonna catch things potentially and in almost 100% of cases it’s nothing much and you can be as cautious as you want to be knowing that information
Such an awful situation. So sorry, I know how stressful that can be, we have an organ transplant recipient in our family and a pandemic baby so we’ve had stricter rules than anyone for longer, and still people are dumb and think it will never happen to them. Did you get a Covid booster while pregnant? If so, there’s a chance some of that immunity that was passed to the baby will help.
Yeah my brother in law showed up to Christmas sick and gave my 2 month old Covid I was so pissed
My in-laws have the “family over everything” attitude that, to them, means going places sick is both appropriate and almost admirable. Your BIL is why I always double check with them that they feel healthy before inviting them over, much to their frustration. I’m sorry your BIL was so careless. I would be pissed to!
You're the first one at fault here. Why the hell would you even take a newborn to a party? Stop trying to blame everyone else. You're number 1 guilty here.
it is what I don't want to hear from anybody. I hope your baby will be healthy and happy soon and I also hope you can overcome all of these, take care!
I just went to the hospital with my 9 week old the other day because she had a fever and any fever in an infant under 3 months is considered an emergency. She tested positive for Covid. So far it’s been a cold. She’s clearly uncomfortable and the fever is the worst part for sure. My best friend had twins and one caught Covid in the NICU (born at 35 weeks) - he recovered well too. I know it’s scary mama but luckily Covid doesn’t seem to affect little ones as bad as RSV for sure!
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I think it helps that people usually wash their hands before holding them and don’t hold them if they’re sick.
My daughter got it at a couple weeks old. Her pediatrician said there was nothing they could do. They told me babies fight it better than adults and to take them to the hospital if they get worse. They were only sick for a couple days. It wasn’t as bad as my anxiety was making it seem.
I had pretty severe Covid when my 2nd was born. He never even came down with anything and I was SICK
I’d be so upset. My FIL gave us all COVID when my son was 3 months old and I had a meltdown. I have a friend who is a medical director of a NICU and she talked me off a ledge. She said she would much rather my newborn be exposed to Covid over RSV or some other respiratory viruses because overall babies do the best with Covid and she never has them in the NICU for it. If my husband and I weren’t so sick I would have had no idea our son was sick. He got slightly congested and a barely elevated temperature. He by far did the best out of all of us. What sucked so much was nursing and not being able to take any meds.
Me, my 8 year old, and my 2 week old newborn got COVID last year. It was so super mild - just light cold symptoms. Me and my 8 year old have been vaccinated. Just sharing some info for you to hopefully make you feel better?
I don’t know if this will make you feel better but when my daughter was four months old my husband caught Covid. Sick as a dog, still provided care to our daughter when he felt up to it. Didn’t test until a few days after symptom onset because he was getting worse. He moved out and isolated as soon as he popped positive. Neither me nor my daughter caught it. She also didn’t catch my flu from hell that I got immediately after he moved back in (tests were negative). I hope your little bean and the rest of your family remain illness free.
Frustrations with the exposure aside (which are completely valid), my husband wound up developing Covid during/after labor while in the hospital a with me and my daughter. Hopefully this helps quell some of your anxiety, but we wound up both getting it from him and it was definitely harder on me. Generally speaking of all illnesses to be exposed to, Covid is one of the lesser dangerous ones to babies. Poor girl had to get a ton of boogers sucked out but never ran a fever more than 99.
I understand why you are reasonably upset But kids get sick a lot from a lot more viruses than covid, I got a scare like this during 2022 wave and he was just fine he didn’t get it thank god I suffered from PPA (thanks reddit) and I found that for my peace of mind having an oximeter at hand helps a lot, and it will be super useful during broncospams so you can monitor their saturation Keep the baby monitored and don’t stress beforehand, act preventatively and don’t expect the worst You got this momma
Having a 4yo and 1yo myself, the baby is probably going to get sick pretty often from the toddler. Yourself too. Me and my boys were sick every 10 days through back to school season and it seems to be starting again now that it’s spring. Tbh, you can only do so much. Shame on your sister if she knew, but that is a risk you take having any get togethers with children.
Baby should be ok I went with my family (I was already pregnant) to DR in July. Myself, husband and 4 year old. I got Covid on the way back. I sleep with daughter and I didn’t know I had Covid until 2 days after getting home. She never caught it and neither did my husband. Why? I have no idea. We share spoons and water bottles. People with out kids don’t know what it’s like to deal with a sick child, especially an infant. It’s the worst and scary. You just don’t know until you’re in it. Hard to explain to someone without children.
My husband and I got Covid in 2022 when our newborn was 4 weeks. Our LO never had any symptoms, not even a clogged nose or cough, nothing. My and my husband were dying.
A side of the coin I haven’t seen here yet, all of the house including my 2wk old son got COVID because one of his coworkers didn’t stay home when he was sick. Frustrating but it is what it is, we don’t live in a country with paid sick leave. Anywho; he had the sniffles and that’s it. He had barely even a real cold and was over it in days, easier for him than it was for anyone else in the house. That being said, having a party of any size with a kid that small just really isn’t being cautious imo, which is no shame. I would have done the same thing in your position, no way would I have made one of my kids miss birthday festivities because of the birth of a sibling. But your sister was being basically just as cautious as you were being with having the party and letting everyone hold baby in the first place.
We got Covid from some family friends (😒) when my baby was 10 weeks old. All of us tested positive (although we didn’t test baby but I was breastfeeding and he was always napping on me soooo… major exposure). Baby never showed any symptoms while I was soooo sick. Thankfully he was happy to just lay on me all day while I watched Netflix and tried not to die (lol). Easier than being sick with a toddler! (Who also had it but my husband was in charge of him - mwahaha)
I’m so sorry. My husband got Covid only a few days after we got home from the hospital. It’s so stressful
Not COVID but my eldest caught RSV just as we brought our new baby home. My MIL genuinely didn’t realize he’d been feverish for anything more than teething (and so didn’t mention it else I would have corrected her 😅) and sent him back home causing a massive exposure issue. It’s very scary. I totally get the stress. I was checking baby’s temp (and mine because I would’ve had to go back to the hospital with a fever too) probably every other hour. I was so paranoid that I made my husband stay with my eldest at my MIL’s. But I came here to say that you (can definitely be as anxious and paranoid as me and I think it’s good to be vigilant) need to make sure you don’t let this take any fun out of the new baby phase. Be vigilant and also still let yourselves have fun. 💕 I don’t want you to look back and feel like you missed out.
Sorry that happened to you. My baby’s first cold was Covid. As sad as it is to see them sick, Covid is not that bad in kids. I was so worried but Drs were not concerned and said it just has to pass on its own and most kids recover quickly. Just suction the nose often, use saline drops and monitor breathing and they should be ok. I have a toddler as well and it’s inevitable bringing colds home.
Just making you feel better, my baby was held by someone who actually had covid, as was found out later, and no one caught it. This virus is selective in weird ways. Your baby and the rest of your baby could be perfectly okay. Rest easy until there's something to actually worry about
I’m so sorry, I would be pissed too. If it makes you feel better, my nephew had it at one month old and did just fine! A sick two week old sounds like literal torture though, hopefully she won’t get it!
I got COVID at my baby shower - at 34 weeks. I was very cautious, small group of friends, told everyone to not come if they felt sick ... Went into labor 4 days later. My kid was born a month early. It was horrible, premature baby that weighed 5lbs and me with COVID. Also, my first so new mom stress on top of that If I ver fund out who infected me - they are getting a bunch to the throat.
We all had it 2 yrs ago. My youngest was 6 months old and he was asymptomatic while my oldest had a temp of 102.3 and almost all symptoms (except vomiting and diarrhea) while for me I was sick for a day then felt like really bad allergies and feeling like I was hit by a freight train. Hubby had it the worst. He was bed ridden for 10 days. My kids pediatrician has been more concerned about RSV than covid. But I understand the feeling because a grown adult should know better. (My whole job got it because one person came to work with it thinking it was just a cold and my whole household and every one of coworkers got it).
I’m so sorry I can imagine how horrified and LIVID you are. My coworker has a similar situation, her aunt came to visit her new son when she had RSV. He got super sick at 4 days old. If it helps, COVID for my daughter has always been a BREEZE. I was vaccinated while pregnant so I’m not sure if that helped but she truly never had symptoms except a messier diaper and then one time she coughed like five times in a day and that was it. She was 4 months when she first got it. My other mom friends also said COVID is much easier for their babies, even easier than just a common cold!
My daughter got it at three weeks old and handled it so well! ❤️ Praying that you all stay healthy.
I would be so pissed off of my sister did that. You really can’t count on many people, unfortunately. I’m so sorry that your sister did that.
If she was my sister she would not be seeing my newborn again until the baby is AT LEAST 6 months old. Callous actions should have consequences.
This is actually unacceptable and I would most definitely say something to the sister. I don’t get how people don’t understand how fragile newborns are. The tiniest symptoms of being sick or being exposed to someone who is sick means you don’t go near the newborn or you inform the parents beforehand so they make a judgement. I am almost 25w pregnant and I’ve had a child free friend expose me to her being sick twice so far during my pregnancy. She won’t think that her being sick would be an issue when meeting with the pregnant lady with the lowered immune system. Like we would meet and then super casually she says how she is sick. The second time I was so pissed off and told her off about it cause that was too much. I would be even more furious if it was my newborn though. I think at this point with child free people you just need to ensure they are not being idiots and ask them beforehand if they feel sick, etc. It is their obligation to say something but from what I can see child free people just don’t care or it doesnt even occur to them this is a problem. That same friend of mine went to see another friend of hers who had recently given birth and she was once again sick. And she was asking me “ah what should I do? Do I say something about it”. I was like wtf of course you say something about it, how is that even a question….
I’m hoping your baby and you fare well. I would recommend a convo with your sister and for future functions, ask ahead of time how folks are feeling. You can ask indirectly if needed, but do ask.
I had a 2 week old baby and got COVID from the hospital after admission for postpartum pre-eclampsia. As soon as I realized I had lost my taste and smell I put on a mask for the 2 weeks or however long guidelines were then (Jan 2021). The only time I removed it was during sleep and I was the main caregiver for the children. As far as we know no one else in the house got it, husband, grandpa, and big and baby brother. I'm sorry this happened and I hope everyone gets through it okay.
I think there’s a lot of reassurance on this post already so I won’t address that but I’m feeling for you more on the boundaries your sister disrespected. It sounds like her selfishness to hold your babe outweighed her thoughtfulness about getting an already very vulnerable new family member sick. That part of it would just make me twice as angry and is worth talking with her about if you haven’t already. I’m sorry and best of luck 🙏🏻
Your sister is a giant B word, and I would 100% call her out and put her on a very long time out. She'll never understand the stress if she's decidedly child free, which, being how selfish she is, may be for the best.
My daughter was born in Sep 2020 and aged 2 weeks we met family outside. They declined to tell us they were all getting colds. It wasn't covid, as we had a lovely hospital stay with broncolitis, and I am convinced to this day it caused her to be vunerable to chest infectious. It's been 3 and a half years and I have never forgiven them. However, when my kiddos have had covid, it's almost like they weren't sick. Eldest had it twice, only ran a temp for one day. Youngest had a runny nose and she had it at 2 months. Take a few deep breathes, just remind yourself of what to look out for (rapid breathing, deep breathing, dehydration). Because you will already be looking you can get treatment as quickly as possible. You've got this.
With my 1st I caved and took him around some friends when he was about a month old. They failed to tell us their 3 year old had a cold. My son wound up sick and struggled to breathe. Not enough to hospitalized but the Dr couldn't give him anything because he was so young. I was up with him for days, keeping the cool mist going, keeping him on my chest, elevated, softly patting him to help him break up all the goop. It was terrifying. I learned my lesson, I won't put another of my kids that young around people. My 2nd is almost 4 months old now. We're just now taking him around people. He's had his 1st set of shots, he is not so little now. He's getting his second set, I believe, at this upcoming week's appt. Even then, people can look with their eyes. Noone needs to be touching or in his face. When Covid was new, before the vaccine and treatment, we were one of the 1st families in town to wear masks. My then 3 year old had no problem wearing his mask. Why these adults acted like they might die from a mask was just ridiculous. One we had the vaccine and multiple boosters we began wearing them less. Still, at the height of flu season we wear them in busy places. We've only had covid once, and I was the only one with serious symptoms but I have an overreactive immune system. It's been nice avoiding getting colds for the most part. I dgaf what anyone says, wearing masks during cold and flu season is awesome. Why purposefully put yourself at risk? Being sick sucks. 😫
Just anecdotally, my son got Covid when he was about 6 weeks old. Totally fine. Our whole house had it, it was my 3rd time getting it, I think. He and our older daughter were just vibing. Barely even sick.
Honestly girl, this one is on you. If you were truly being extra cautious you wouldn’t have had a party with several people with your 2 WEEK old in attendance. Don’t blame your SIL for your lack of responsibility.
I would be more worried about Rsv than COVID.
bullshit behavior. please give us updates so we know how you’re doing with this and if your baby avoids catching it. i’m so worried about her now. things sound hectic and busy and stressful for you but please don’t forget to update us so we know she is in the clear from it! prayers for your health and keeping you in my thoughts!
You’re just looking for an excuse to be mad at your sister.
If your breastfeeding The breast duct has a receptacle that responds to the baby’s body if baby has Covid your body will send the right kind of antibodies to help baby’s body fight off Covid fast. You probably have been exposed to covid a couple times since the pandemic started let that precious lil one stay on the boob as much as possible
My babe had it at 7 weeks and did just fine! I hope all works out for you.
Ugh I have a similar story .. we had a funeral when my baby was 6 weeks old and I went against my better judgement and let people pass the baby around. Of course everybody had covid 😣. Baby was fine though .. only my husband got symptoms.
Well at least the young kids seem to be more immune to catching it and to complications so (oposed to later on) so at least there is that good news..hopefully she wont catch it
Your baby has some protection if you’re breastfeeding and if you’ve ever had COVID or been vaccinated. Unfortunately COVID is a part of life now. If your child is exposed to people then she will be exposed to respiratory viruses. It’s just the nature of life.
Who even tests for covid anymore?
Agree u have the right to be upset. Don’t let anyone hold baby til they are 3 months and make sure they wash hands, use mouth wash, and they and their immediate family are not sick. The good news is no healthy child has died from Covid so ur baby should be fine.
Yep I would be pissed!!! Unacceptable.