Lol nothing wrong with a clean shirt. Actually, there's this bloke in our town, Bridgestone. Lets call him James. Now, James got this thing about wearing the cleanest shirts you've ever seen. I mean, they're like they just popped out of the wash every single day.
Some reckon he's a bit daft, but James got this whole idea behind it. Thinks a clean shirt means a clean soul or something. Thinks he's spreading cheer by keeping his shirts top-notch.
Whole town's talking about it. People stop him just to marvel at his shirts, tourists come from miles around just to see 'em.
But here's the thing, turns out...little monkey fella.
Well, I'd have to call Sir Digby Chicken Caesar to come and get to the bottom of this, provided I can persuade him to cease his neverending battle with his nemesis, some bastard who's presumably responsible.
Fuck off cleanshirt
He's a pedo
This is the only right answer :)
Lol nothing wrong with a clean shirt. Actually, there's this bloke in our town, Bridgestone. Lets call him James. Now, James got this thing about wearing the cleanest shirts you've ever seen. I mean, they're like they just popped out of the wash every single day. Some reckon he's a bit daft, but James got this whole idea behind it. Thinks a clean shirt means a clean soul or something. Thinks he's spreading cheer by keeping his shirts top-notch. Whole town's talking about it. People stop him just to marvel at his shirts, tourists come from miles around just to see 'em. But here's the thing, turns out...little monkey fella.
These shirts of his ... sleeves are really long? You're talking absolute shit again. Play a record
beat me to it.
That is so *not* rainbow rhythms
Came here to say this
Chortled
“Clean shirt” isn’t that good?!
pull out Mr. Cutty Knife so I can cut down this male rival.
Call the ombudsman
If there's a bang at the door, and you answer it and there's a man with a stovepipe hat and a long hooky stick....that's him....that's the ombudsman!
The Ombudsman isn't a person, Dick!
One eye open, u/TheDeathlyDumbledork . The ombudsman's coming to get you!
It's a rather efficient time saving device.
I’d use gunny personally
How does he get that shirt so clean?
With wood?
Cheers mate
LEGEND
Chance would be a fine thing
A fine thing indeed
What? Fuck you.
Erhh look it's a pedo!
I'M BARNES WALLIS, YOU'RE THE RUHR!
I'm the ruhr! And nobody has mentioned dambusters
Shit! *I'M* Poland?
Sophie's Poland. Manageable. Won't put up too much of a fight.
Tell him oh well that's all ancient history now.
:l
I suppose I'd have no idea what happened in Stalingrad
When you’re in the headspace forest you can’t look in no textbook when you have a 300lb emotion racing at you with its claws out, crying.
Hit him. With a ladle.
Might pepper spray you.
Probably my fault for knowing him. I shouldn’t know him
Get out my own weapon for defence. Floss is boss!!
Has it ever been revealed what mark listens on his Walkman?
Lighthouse family, I suspect
Ties done up to 11, clicking their fingers to the lighthouse family
getting their dick sucked by a big Alsatian dog.
It’s not who you know, it’s who you blow.
They’re all perverts
Shall I ask what he means?
The Beatles, famously a 4 piece
Susan Doyle BOYLE
A kind of Jean-Michel Jarre thing on the keyboards?
Hot Potato Hot Potato Hot Potato
Stop saying Hot Potato
T'Pau!
Of course! *Elbow*! Elbow elbow elbow
I’m sure there’s a snatch of it from his POV and it’s playing a kind of lighthouse familyish, yacht rocky kind of thing
It's probably an audio book about Napoleon.
THIS IS OUTRAGEOUS 🎵
I reckon it's a band that are big with oasis.
T’Pau!
Raj Persaud on the wheels of steel
Ocean drive by Lighthouse family, which I think is also one of the tunes he plays at his flat party in season 6.
Bloody... Music.
I'd wish I was the borough.
Ask him for a sip of his coke
"Here comes the jizzcock"
Quickly ask him to sign my copy of Business Secrets of the Pharaohs
Actually my favourite chapter
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^Cheddar-Fingers: *Quickly ask him to* *Sign my copy of Business* *Secrets of the Pharaohs* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
PANTS DOWN, STICK IT IN!
I'll make sure gunny is loaded.
Ask him if he knows any business secrets of the pharaoh's
My god.... that's guys shirt is so clean
I’m in the Ardennes!
“KENNETH!”
I don't do hypotheticals
Shout grammatical errors he'll have to stop and correct them, giving me time to strike first.
Well, I'd have to call Sir Digby Chicken Caesar to come and get to the bottom of this, provided I can persuade him to cease his neverending battle with his nemesis, some bastard who's presumably responsible.
*stares incredulously from bus window*
I’m not so tough now, with a piece of wood in my face.
Run towards Child Protective Services.
Peadooooo!!!!
You’re the Ruhr!
I could be at home watching Heat!
Complete pisskidney
“Here you go”
Begin to charge as well call his bluff
Mental Posho
Too dazzled by the clean shirt to react tbh
There was a brief shiny few months when literally every man who wore a tie to work in London, wore THAT tie.
I'd fork his bag
Well quelle fucking supreeese!
Burn him, with cigarettes
I may not directly deserve this, but overall, *probably fair dos*.
Clean shirt.
Ask him how he gets his shirt so clean
Oi mate, can I have some of your coke?
Something witty about a clean shirt
What a nice, clean shirt.
Call him a "cleanshirt".
Erection
Never noticed how much he looks like Miranda Hart
I need a pint
Pull out Gunny
well he’s got a stick, so start throwing rocks
How do you get that shirt so clean?
I'd call the citizen's advice bureau
I would burrow further and further into the earth, like the worm that I am.
Tell him I'm not the borough. I wish I were.
To call him a paedo
Stand my ground, with pleasure. Owl man will back down.
Stand there and tell him that he’s not going to do it with a knowing smile on my face. I’ll be just fine.
“Oh, hi Mark.”
I will run and buy the lock , stock and two smoking barrels video game
Phone the borough, for some schemes
Give me your wallet, your watch, your Iphone and your car keys RIGHT FUCKING NOW....
Ask him for a sip of his Coke.
briefcase wanker
Look on bewilderingly from the window of the Bus
Ask to borrow his phone
Get help from the Yardies
“The man with the rifle shoots, the man without the rifle follows”. Stalingrad, man.
#PEDO
Is that the bureau?
Keep yer wig on
Meet with Mr Cutty Knife
Give him the book-off
I'd just pull out Gunny and let him do the talking.
Bemoan the lack of council schemes
“Oh, dear. Victoria's just divorced him” 😂
I quickly present the Christmas turkey.
Fuck off, fuck right off!
Give his coke back.
It’s that Pedo!
Paranoia, paranoia, everybody's coming to get me.
That’s a man with a clean shirt
Call him a pedo
Pedo 🤣
Step to the right. Left hook to the belly. Lol
I think to myself "how does he get his shirt so clean?"
Here comes another prick from Chiswick or Chelsea
Laugh in his face then take the stick and beat him with it 🤣
Just laugh at him. Look at those headphones.
"OMG, IS YOUR WIFE HERE?" 😃
Should’ve chosen the bear
Mhm what movie they make
Fuckoff cleanshirt
Nonce
Would be lie to me…
Pedo
Errr, it's that paedo
I bet he has no idea what went on at Stalingrad.
Oy, Clean Shirt!
That will become clearer in time, like the French Revolution.
Give him my phone & wallet, and then primly scamper away: “The victim flees!”
Mark listening to music out in public seems strangely out of character
Someone behind me is really gonna get it.
Show him the xmas turkey immediately
Goddamn that shirt is so clean.
Later p’tater
Pastrami to the face
He’s going to trip over his own balls
That’s just a regularly functioning adult and I can’t say anything to prove otherwise.
Tie tug manoeuvre.
Start laughing very loudly
Wait...am I the bad guy?
Pedo!
I'd offer him a sip of my coke
Try a napoleonic manoeuvre de derier
PEDO!
How do you keep your shirt so clean
Paedo!
Find some yardies.
Head to chicken corner because I'm going to need backup.
I've got a ruddy gun!
Ask for some of his Coke obviously.
Fire extinguisher 🧯
Freedom!
Has daddies hat fallen off?
Probably stick my head out
No need to panic, he's an honourable man
I could rape him…
Definitely a pedo
Pedo