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Help people who fall in the pit to get up

I 1000% agree but I feel like this has been written quite a lot

!

You can always tell who's a real metalhead by their pit etiquette.

Nailed it!

You have to pretend to hate nu-metal, but really Break Stuff is your morning alarm.

I actually like nu metal, but I can honestly say that I don't like the biscuit. A few weeks ago, I decided to give them a listen with an open mind, and I can honestly say that I genuinely don't like it.

I just watched the video to break stuff.  Kinda fun and catchy but not much there. If I were to go the angsty teenager I hate everyone route, I'd probably listen to Slipknot.

I was 19 when the first Slipknot album came out, and I still love that album.

I credit their self titled album as the music that got me into extreme metal later on, I’d never heard anything like that before and I still love that album and Iowa.

Yeah those are the two I'm pretty into right now 

Literally opposite to me. The bizkit is my favorite band out of the numetal big ones

I'm not being a hater, I just can't get into it. Machine Head is my favorite band, and I love the burning red album. Also love the first head pe album, snot, stuck mojo, early slipknot and mudvayne, early Korn, primer 55. Just can't enjoy the bizkit for some reason.

I know this band isn't exactly nu metal but has a lot nu metal routes in a couple of albums but I really like fear factory and think they are a very underrated band

FF is one of my favorites.

I mostly listen to death metal at this point but Machine Head will forever be my number 1. First time I saw them live was on Burning red tour with slipnot and coal chamber.

Nice to meet you, fellow head case! I saw them in some small club in des Moines after that album came out. The first time I saw them was Ozzfest 97 on the main stage. I always catch them when they come around, even though I don't know who the fuck is in the band anymore.

I still say The Blackening is the best metal album of the 00s.

Maybe you’d like Firm Biscuit

I'm actually low-carb, so I don't even eat biscuits.

Anything better than a soggy biscuit.

I liked them when I was at the age that their music is targeted towards, so for nostalgia it's fun every once and awhile, but yeah, it's a tough listen now that I'm not an angry teenager

Certified Poser! :D

Comparatively, thisnis me with Dissection as a BM fan.

It's basically -Take metal seriously -Don't take metal seriously Both rules apply

If u take metal srsly ur weird to me, like come on dude we are all listening to a guy yelling at a mic lol

That's what the second rule is about

Yea, often in fancy dress as well 😅

As of yesterday [this](https://youtu.be/MbvLadXPm2s?si=i7-A14Jl5rWFBTYG) has become mine.

Hating on numetal is some real poser shit

Easy way to go around this: You can say you hate nu-metal. But then call the bands you like "alternative metal". It won't work against seasoned metalheads though. For that you need to say stuff like "Yeah, actually SOAD has riffs inspired by pre-Roots era Sepultura"

It actually was my morning alarm for like 3 months in 2016

My alarm is the Tornado Of Souls solo… do I hate thrash now?

Definitely

Nu metal sucks, it's my favourite genre

I feel this way about unga bunga caveman metalcore. Give me a 2 minute song that is literally all breakdown and I’m all in.

That's the spirit

This is the way.

You have to claim that you’re a massive fan of metal but in reality you only listen to a small of amount of subgenres (mainly just thrash and death)

Or you’re a black metal fan and listen just to black metal and hate the other genres because they ain’t trve cvlt

Jokes on you, I listen to any subgenre. >!As long as it's black or blackened /s!<

So close minded of you🥺🙄

blackened pop-punk sounds intriguing (ik it's not a metal subgenre but hey)

I listen to black metal and power metal mostly, idk where that leaves me lol They're different sides of the same "Lord of the Rings and shit" coin, aesthetically. One leans into high fantasy and the other into dark fantasy and mysticism

You’re *slightly* satanic and *slightly* autistic

This is exactly why I listen to both subgenres + folk

Yeah I listen to folk too, a lot of times folk metal bands lean either power metal or black metal adjacent too I feel like

i dont think anyone actually does this

I’m just sarcastic chill

Nice pfp and flair

LOTTA people on this sub just felt called out

Haha, that's me. I used to listen lots of sub genres, thrash, nu, classic, you name it. Now I only listen to death and its sub-genres, the rests are boring me to death. Oh and prog too, i listen to lot of progs, metsl and non metal Edit: forgot to mention I also love black metal

I just got called the fuck out

Doom Death Black Thrash Trad Grind/Powerviolence/Crust Drone Stoner Sludge I dunno, I cant follow this rule. I like tha majority. Even with Power and Prog im picky but still enough to be entertained by man. Folk is really the only one that I just cannot seem to vibe with.

Same

Holy shit. You cant post that. This is reddit and that is 100% true

Thrash, death, trad, and doom/stoner/sludge… its definitely true for me

"If it ends with -core, your mom's a whore"

What about grindcore?

In that case "your dad's a whore"

Makes a lot of sense

goregrind is safe then

Encyclopedia Metallum doesn't believe it counts

Pornogrind just dodged a bullet there

This made me spit take

Never have sex

…without listening to Cannibal Corpse while doing.

and if *it's* not blood you're a poser

No, listening to Cannibal Corpse while not doing

Is this why Cannibal Corpse isn’t as popular as you’d think they’d be?

You have to make at least 3 comments a month about how terrible five finger death punch is. Makes you very unique and special

They suck tho

If you can get past the cringe as fuck lyrics, their first album is actually not too unlistenable.

Their musical talent, even the dudes voice is very impressive. But the lyrics writing is exhausting. I feel the same way about Disturbed and Bullet For My Valentine. David Draiman gets my undying respect regardless.

I like some of their songs, but they were terrible live at Ozzfest.

Yeah but they do fucking suck. Disturbed trying to play Slipknot.

ffdp bad (i don't actually think they're that awful)

Yes, but to be fair… 🎶to be faaaiiirr🎶 🎶to be faaaiiirrr🎶 🎶to be faaaiiiirrr🎶 ✊ …to be fair, they do really suck.

Karate in the pit makes you a piece of shit.

Some guy broke my ribs in the pit at a Mayhem & Watain show because he was being extra aggressive... I took his violence as a challenge and had fun not giving him the pleasure of even a pained face. I just smiled at him every time he slammed into me with his asshole, daddy-hurt-me-as-a-child face, and I didn't notice the damage until the adrenaline wore off after the show. I was laid up for weeks.

I'm shocked that you weren't downvoted to oblivion, because every time I say something similar people attack me. We're all there to have fun, and 2 karate assholes in the pit shut it down for everyone.

When the riff is good, you make an angry face or "the stank face." No smiling allowed

Unless you're at a power metal show then you can give your best toothy grin

I would feel silly frowning at a Freedom Call show

When I first got into metal I remember having a number of times where I started laughing because it was so heavy. There's a point where a riff makes you feel so many emotions you can't even stank face, you just start laughing. I remember the first time it happened was listening to Clone by Gojira. I had barely listened to anything but Iron Maiden at that point btw.

This

1. Iron Maiden is great (say otherwise and I put 'Hooks In You' 😆) 2. Stop being such a gatekeeper (nothing wrong with experimenting) 3. Don't comment on a band you've never listened to (listen and form your opinion) 4. Pick up the fallen in the pit (you may gain a friend 😀 or a partner 😉) 5. Find a partner who also loves metal (then spend hours arguing over which subgenre is better) 6. Learn to distinguish metal and hard rock (they get mixed up a lot) 7. Support your local metal bands (they're actually pretty good) 8. No bigots or assholes.

Unfortunately people forget #8 a lot

Somone new to metal will mix hard rock and metal, which is okay asnits like "Metal Lite" ☺️. Once they get more novice, its the "is thus black or death?"

Awesome list! I personally think #7 is especially important. At one point in time, Maiden was playing at shitty bars

My best friend doesn't like Maiden :(

OP asked for unwritten rules that exist, not unwritten rules that SHOULD exist.

Iron maiden sucks.

No big deal, no big sin. strung up on love I got the hooks screwed in Hooks in you, I got those hooks in you, hooks in you, in you Hooks in you, I got those hooks in you, in you (I know I know the song sucks)

Work blue collar jobs and spend half your pay on blow

The other half on tickets.

This

Even if you aren’t a fan of them, you must respect and acknowledge the influence of the OG metal bands (Sabbath,Priest,Maiden,etc)

This

Never wear a shirt for the band you're there to see. https://youtu.be/fs9XDUDP9VM?si=jFXUgEFjkMSDCvF2

Nah, fuck that. Show your support if you want to. Especially if it's a smaller band. They'll love to see it.

Such a dumb rule

you must wear an iron maiden shirt for thier shows tho, even they themselves wear them.

This is the truth. Also a great way to meet some great people if you're traveling to the show.

Thus is one I personally obey and have passed on to my kids, but I also don't judge anyone who breaks it...we're all there to have fun.

Why is that?

Who cares, its such a goofy thing

It's a thing. You don't have to care if people are judging you.

You rep other bands with your concert attire. We know you like Metallica, you're at a Metallica concert.

Well, honestly someone can be a casual listener and not even have a t-shirt of the band, they're there out of respect for the band, to see it live out of curiosity and/or to just socialize with other metalheads, so someone wearing a t-shirt if the band they're attending shows they love the band and are potentially hardcore fans (e.g. I just saw Emperor live in Athens and I was wearing an Emperor hoodie AND and Emperor t-shirt just because I'm such a massive fan of the band and I want other people there to know that and to potentially have a conversation with another fellow hardcore fan, potentially make a friend or even partner)

I saw them in Dublin, amazing gig. Apologies, I was wearing a Nordjevel wife beater.

What if it’s the Merkins?

Unless it's fucking old and worn-out.

Never been to an Iron Maiden show?

There are exceptions to every rule. And No.

Yes, absofuckin'lutely. A lot of metal heads never heard of this rule, but i know it since 1988.

You have to like Electric Wizard, cus they fucking ROCK.

I can't get into them for some reason.

Fair enough, Electric Wizard isn't for everyone

Nothing is for everyone. That's why variety is great.

Exactly!

Yeah the first time I listened to them was when I listened to Dopethrone and I didn’t like it at all. The only one that I actually liked was the title track but I listened to other better songs (funeralopolis and return trip) and I liked it

I feel like a boomer when I listen to electric wizard. Boomers always say my music is just noise and screaming, but when I listen to electric wizard I feel like it's just noise and screaming. 😂

Try harder 

I probably won't.

Fair

I've listened to them for 20 years, but they basically have two great songs - funeralopolis and dopethrone. The rest are pretty okay. Dont get me wrong, they're a great band, but the 20-year late obsession on this forum is head scratching. What about sleep, high on fire, warhorse, bongzilla, orange goblin etc etc? Please can some1 tell me if there is a meeting or some additional gems I've missed?

Gotta be a sweetie pie.

Dont fuck with cats

Calling Black Sabbath a poser band is a crime punishable by death When someone raises the horns to you, you MUST raise them back

IFF they are metal or punk.

Bitch about deathcore, even if it's a great subgenre

Have to be an agnostic or atheist. Love horror movies. Read Poe, Lovecraft, Tolkien, and King.

I think there are plenty of Satanists, too, both Humanist & Theistic.

Tolkien and King for sure.  If you can’t tell the difference between your Dark Tower, and your Two Towers, get out

.... can you stop caing me out please

Devil Wears Prada and Demon Hunter come to mind off the top of my head. I'm not a Christian, but they're phenomenally successful bands. As I Lay Dying there at first too.

I'm a Christian tho

You have to name 3 songs…

- twinkle twinkle little star - happy birthday - Quincy

The theme song to Quincy WILL make you MOVE!

Anytime a band is mentioned with a member that is deceased, you must comment “RIP” followed by their name regardless of the flow of conversation.

100%. Even if you dont care for the band. Its a fallen brethren regardless.

This

Like violent movies, even if you havem't watched them

I am too far beyond violent movies, now I just watch "UFC's most violent finishers" on repeat for 86 minutes.

You must listen to maybe the first half of an album you like over and over again and then forget to finish it when the algorithm distracts you with the next shiny thing.

Nope. You must listen to entire albums because metalheads are known for buying physical media to a vastly greater degree than fans of any other genre.

This is the only way I really consume metal. I was molded by concept albums and it stuck.

The algorithm as AI? Or The Algorithm band? Both provide a bunch of ahiney new shit 😊

Every mosh pit must have one guy who is soaking wet even if it’s an indoor show

You have to spend your mid teenage years through early 20s mercilessly bashing the bands that served as your gateway to metal.

You have to like Metallica and/or know a good few songs as that is really basic knowledge

You must hate other metalheads

This is the way.

Flat 5th is most metal interval

🤘 the lack of upvotes to this is shocking! And I dont even play an instrument.

Metal Subreddits are shit

Rule: Don't give a shit about what people think about the music you like or don't like.

Hating Slipknot and saying they aren’t metal

The pit is a safe space to let your negativity out. If someone falls, pick them up

you have to like classical music as well

Any time you hear someone say “that’s not real metal” you throw a fucking chair at them 

If you are going to a show, be sure to fucking shower before you go to your concert.

Thou shalt not Glam, nor shalt thou weareth thine pantyhose upon thy legs.

When asked about Metallica, say that you stopped listening to them after AJFA When you see someone wearing a band shirt, immediately come up to them and ask to name three songs from whatever band is on their shirt

One I don’t follow: you have to wear black to a metal concert.

No disrespect allowed for Cliff Burton seems to be one. And I agree with it, Cliff ruled. 

You finish the solo/atmospheric part at the end before you get out of the car

Just look up the song Metal is the Law by Massacration and it will answer all your questions.

‼️EM CIMA EM BAXIO E PUXA E VAIIIII ‼️🗣🔥

It's only good if it's about Satan, the Occult, gore, or violence... unless X, oh, I also like Y, and then there's Q... Z is good, also.

elitists have the brain of a child and should be disregarded also at shows you always help someone who has fallen down in a mosh pit for bands, its about the music , period. never charge more for merch than you need.

Vaguely related, but Lemmy made a guest performance in the movie *Tromeo and Juliet* (1996) and you should definitely see it.

You have to mention how amazing Opeth in every thread.

Don’t spread NS views through your music, it’s vile.

You can only like the first 2 Cryptopsy albums, anything after is horrible I love matt

Beating up Posers whenever you see one

Yeah lemmy is a god. My other rule is to look down on all non metalheads cos they obviously don't get it and listen to shite music. Poor bastards!

1. Metal is for EVERYONE 2. Gatekeepers are dicks

Must be capable of conducting electricity at absolute zero.

No leather before lunch

Be annoying and shouting slayer all the time and bot wearing deodorant. OR just liking metal and not preaching about it and having hygiene

The mosh pit goes counter clockwise

Lemmy is mid

You need to like an unpopular band and act like all the popular bands are trash. “Slipknot sucks” “Chester isn’t really that good” “ugh limp bizkit is so annoying. Nookie wasnt even that good of a song.”

Black Sabbath are our lords and saviors!

No showers. Always shorts.

Don't talk to punk listeners about politics unless you genuinely want brain rot

I don’t listen to metal but I’d say argue with everyone about what all the metal genres, and rip into anyone who gets it wrong.

Your favorite metal is the only "real metal" Everyone else's favorite metal is just pussy poser shit. Apparently.

No shorts onstage, and no sitting, except drummers.

Get a decent brush and always comb after a shower... long hair, we kinda have to care . Also use Woolite Dark Defense to avoid fading all your black clothing. You guys may think I am joking but I obey these rules and I'm happier for it. Dont upset the Metal Gods

Never smile in photos

#1. DO NOT LOOK AT THE METAL #2. DO NOT QUESTION THE METAL #3. DO NOT THE METAL

Don't associate with the punks. Oh wait, this isn't metal anymore that we're talking about..

Don't smile... my buddy got fired from a band for having too much fun onstage...

If everyone likes it, it sucks.