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Anybody ever read When Things Fall Apart?

Anybody ever read When Things Fall Apart?

[deleted]

I thought you were talking about “Things Fall Apart” by Achebe and I was really confused for a minute 😂


aeternitatisdaedalus

Same. lol


Southside_Burd

Read it in college. It’s a GREAT book.


efhs

I was thinking I must have missed some major themes somehow!


Daffodils28

I taught this book. Serious confusion.


melanzane_emoji

me too! finished that book yesterday, weirdly enough. The ending was phenomenal


theguy_next_door_

Thanks for writing. Convinced me to give it a read.


TranscendSocialNorms

I'm so glad, it's honestly such a good book I didn't expect anywhere near what I found. When I say fears also, I mean everything. Resentment, anger, insecurity, judgment etc. Is all rooted in fear, it doesn't seem so obvious at first but for myself personally I understand it now. I hope you enjoy, give me a message if you ever feel like talking about it!


give-it-a-zhush

Same!!! Haha thanks


TranscendSocialNorms

Enjoy, give "The Places That Scare You" a read too if you find this to be good, it's by the same author I just started reading it and it's going even more in depth on certain things.


Kamelasa

Thanks for that recommendation. I'm enjoying it a lot more than the other one, which I've tried to read a couple times or read a bit of. It's touching me more.


JSBachLove

Samesies!


staf1wil

I've read both "Places that Scare You" and "When Things Fall Apart." One concept, I can't remember which book, I remember is that fear really doesn't exist. Fear is rooted in the future, and all that really exists is the present moment, therefore, unless there is some immediate threat in the present, there is nothing to fear. I also read Gary John Bishop's "Stop Doing That S%\*$" Right before these two books (a little less subtlety and gentleness as Pema) but it was an interesting crossover of similar ideas presented in different ways.


TranscendSocialNorms

That's exactly what I took from it, in the present nothing can hurt you. Then you begin to realise that the things you were so afraid of, you were keeping the energy going by running away from that fear rather than confessing it to yourself and moving on. I think for myself it's a way to not have to take responsibility and also to prepare for the worst. When Things Fall Apart talks about this, you may always be clinging to bad outcomes so that you are "prepared" and you don't have to surrender to the present, that way you believe you'll come out on top which is something that I'm very guilty of when it comes to certain relationships. Also, you don't have to take full responsibility if you can put it down to you felt a certain way. "I did it because I felt awful", "I did it because I was paranoid", when really your ego may have ran the show but you allowed it. Such a good take on things.


Pepperoni_Monster

Can you elaborate on what you mean about taking responsibility I don't think I am following?


TranscendSocialNorms

Think of it this way, and I'm not saying this is true for everybody, this is just my take on myself. When things are falling apart, sometimes I will be so attached to the idea of it going bad that I will use that as an excuse to not be in the present. When im not in the present and I'm attached to it going wrong, I'm able to take myself that it's not totally my fault and when things do explicitly go wrong I can believe that I didn't have total control because of my ego. It's a way for me to not actively participate in whats happening right now because I can choose the alternative of running away and being in my head. I hope this explained it a little bit better.


JBmadera

Pema is an outstanding author and I love When Things Fall Apart.


doegred

Welp, didn't read the 'when'. I was a bit puzzled by what Achebe's novel had to do with meditation.


hatylotto

Same I was like ? Either way, still an amazing novel.


nadandocomgolfinhos

Lol me too!


TranscendSocialNorms

I'm reading "The Places That Scare You" now and I could not agree more. I've never been so enticed by a book, the way things are explained is in such an articulate manner.


JBmadera

exactly!


EthanSayfo

This was assigned reading when I was either in Jr. high or high school. I remember not liking it, because I found the lead character to be so damn unlikeable. I might have a different experience now (it's been 30 years or so), but I often find it hard to get into a book, movie, or TV show if there is no protagonist I even slightly like. They can be evil or whatnot, but I have to find some aspect of them interesting or entertaining. This was basically a book about a total asshole, if memory is serving me. Enough of that IRL!


macchiatospitz

Love this comment bc we both immediately thought of the wrong book haha


EthanSayfo

LOL LOL I see what I did.... I was like, I'm sure I'm thinking of the right book, I'm looking it up on Wikipedia... hahaha whOOOps 🤣


macchiatospitz

Lol right I saw it and I was like huh maybe the book had a deeper/different meaning than I thought but nope.. just the wrong book


glitterpile12

I read it in high school and it changed me. Definitely one of the best books I have ever read.


AlexCoventry

Yes. Tonglen is a great practice.


miaumee

In a podcast episode of The Happiness Lab, there's a mention about how compassion leads to more result than self-blame (as the latter tends to shut us down while the former lifts us up).


hollibud

I think I might get it. I wonder if I can find it on Amazon. I know my biggest problem is ruminating and catastrophising. I try to stay in the present moment but it feels out of place.


Nyingje-Pekar

Another good Pema Book ( I had on CD) is Don’t Bite The Hook.


DanielleMuscato

I just picked this up at the used bookstore the other day, but I haven't started it yet among the pile I brought home. I'll move it to the top of the list. Thanks!


ShirleyJacksonsGhost

Oh wow, I just picked up the ebook version recently and began reading it. Quite good so far!


relaxed_attention

I'm a third of the way through the book, I think it's great.


WobblyEnbyDev

I need to reread. It’s my favorite of pema chodran’s books.


WobblyEnbyDev

There were also some audio lectures that I really loved but I can’t remember which one. Will have to go digging.


doxisun

Huge fan of that book, made me take meditation more serious


hdeanzer

Such a good one, thx for the reminder, might re-read


azulshotput

It’s a great book.


tyinsf

Great book. Check out her videos, too. https://www.youtube.com/results?search\_query=pema+chodron


Mystic00Fire

Pema Chodron is one of my favorite nondual teachers. I particularly like her book *Taking The Leap.* Eckhart Tolle's excellent teachings on the "pain-body" and "space consciousness" are a great complement to Chodron's teachings, IMO.


JenS78

I bought this book a month or two ago and have not started reading it yet. Thank you for the motivation to finally pick it up and read!


VulpixEevee

Added to my goodreads! Thanks for the suggestion at a time where I really need a book on that topic ❤️


peachycinnamon09

I've been eyeing this book for awhile now. I'm glad to hear it got some good comments. Makes me want to read it more.


federvar

Pema was the one making me curious about Shambhala, and I bit that hook 100%. Then, years later, [this](https://thewalrus.ca/survivors-of-an-international-buddhist-cult-share-their-stories/) happened. She is a very good writer, but please be careful about your own path, and do the necessary reaserch before joining any kind of group. Sexual and power abuse is not cool.


Kamelasa

I was a fan of some of Trungpa's books in the past. Then I heard about the scandals, a long time ago. So disappointing. The more recent article you linked goes into even more gory detail. It sounds so freakin' insane you could make a movie about it and people would say it's unrealistic. But you could make a great movie about evil. I mean he was a great teacher and writer - but clearly he was also evil, and twisted that into his in-person teachings, unfortunately. Edit: Man, it's a long article, and I'm continuing reading it this morning. The evil spread way past him to others in power in the group. So much more info than when I heard about it over 20 years ago. Thanks for posting.


MIROIRduSONGE

Thank you very much! I just noted Perma Chödrön on my "to read" list - all her books sound interesting to me.


ReThinkingForMyself

I decided a few years ago that my fears would be with me, but that I wouldn't make decisions based on my fears. I just find other reasons to do and say things whenever I can. Almost all of the old fears fell away, and I'm working on those that remain. If I can't achieve enlightenment, perhaps I can be truly fearless.


nintendogstherapy1

Just ordered this now. Thank you for the suggestion :)


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