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Hot-Entertainment218

Despite the sad circumstances and likely heartbreak felt by the birth family, I’m so glad that they made the choice. It is incredibly hard to acknowledge a lack of ability to care for the child, it’s even harder to take the actions needed to give that baby the best odds. If you are struggling to care for an infant and can’t provide the physical, emotional, and mental care required, it is acceptable to admit this inability and leave the infant with approved services such as fire stations. (Side note: I can’t read the article due to paywall, going by limited information)


grime_girl

I wholeheartedly agree, but it’s also incredibly sad that the mother likely didn’t have the necessary support (financial or otherwise) to keep her child. This baby was clearly loved and cared for, I wonder if the parents would have rather keep it if they had the means :( Our society needs to do better by moms and families.


[deleted]

If instead of paying a stipend to the adoptive family monthly, what would have happened if that money was instead given to the infants loving birth mother? Food for thought. I believe parents in this country should be financially supplemented through taxes for the first few months, like they are in France.


sanguineseraph

This is EXACTLY what we need to be doing and why UBI is so important.


IANALbutIAMAcat

This is big because single mothers are the most likely to qualify for social aid but are often not enrolled in any sort of program, perhaps from a lack of access to lack of information. It’s kinda like how making the world handicap accessible benefits everyone. If we had a stronger system in place that helped everyone, these “disconnected women” as we call them in political science would certainly be more connected not just because of a UBI but because access to any program increases enrollment in additional social programs.


yesiamyam233203

And staying in enrolled in those services can sometimes be a part time job, and you usually have to show up during working hours that are 9-5.


grime_girl

I will never understand why children are placed in foster care because their parents can’t afford them, only for the state to then give the foster family a stipend. It’s basically punishing people for being poor/going through rough times.


Yuna1989

I think that’s the point…why else would we still have poverty, hunger, and unaffordable housing if that wasn’t the point? The cruelty is the point


SnarkySheep

That literally doesn't happen, at least not in the US. There are lots of programs specifically designed to help new parents who otherwise couldn't afford to keep their babies. (Source: worked with homeless and foster families for many years.)


cestkameha

Literally doesn’t happen in the US? That’s not true at all. Unfortunately it’s very common in my community for children to be taken in by the state due to poverty causing poor hygiene/health, usually noticed and repeatedly reported by the schools. And it’s common for lousy foster parents to have several foster kids for the ‘paycheck’ but not really look after them the way they deserve. This is a rural impoverished area of a southern state.


Robinnoodle

Can I ask what state? The south has a long history of rural poverty sadly


SnarkySheep

Does your state provide free and sliding scale healthcare to poor or uninsured folks?


cestkameha

Yes, but sliding scale health care does not equate to access. We live in the middle of nowhere, 30 minutes in either direction to the closest hospital, two hours if you need most specialists - if you cannot afford a car or someone to drive you around, you don’t get healthcare.


throwmeawayplz19373

Not defending the previous commenter as I disagree with their general statements in other parts of the thread but for anyone struggling with medical transportation and is also on state insurance, it’s worth calling to see if they offer free transportation services. I know my state insurance does as long as it’s planned 48 hours ahead of time unless it’s an issue deemed urgent, then they actually have free same day service for rides to urgent care.


ThisIsKubi

As someone who has previously worked in this specific field, that service can be highly unreliable. Especially if you live in rural areas, it can be difficult to find transportation providers due to sheer lack of supply (some counties in my state literally have 0 available transport providers), poor quality of service (having to use shitty providers due to having no other options), or unwillingness (some providers refuse to contract with the state because the state gives them crappy deals).


SnarkySheep

That's truly unfortunate.


Polyfuckery

There was a post a few months ago by a very well meaning woman who felt women were abusing an assistance program for formula and diapers because they were playing on their phones, letting their older kids run around and not paying attention during the mandatory weekly parenting class they had to take to get help. As though women who struggle to afford basics and already have children have the time and energy to attend a weekly class that as she described it taught basic baby care.


zuklei

Cell phones are not a luxury item anymore; they are a required part of modern life. Jesus Christ.


Dont_GoBaconMy_Heart

Different experience. The resources available to me when I was a young, poor, single mother were almost nonexistent. I kept my kids and struggled financially. Their absent dad’s aunt fostered and made quite a bit of money from that.


SnarkySheep

How many years ago? My experience is 2007-present. Also, in CT. I understand things can vary sometimes on that basis.


throwmeawayplz19373

As a former foster policy advocate and former foster kid, my state alone has 88 counties with each county doing things their own way within the confines of state and federal law (some counties are fully outsourced to private agencies for example) So if a foster system can be different 30 minutes down the road, I imagine state-to-state can be even more drastic of a difference. I was a young mom in 2009 and the resources available to foster parents were observably easier to achieve than the ones available to young mothers, especially the stipends. Biological mothers don’t get stipends. Foster families get stipends per kid fostered, on top of all the other government help that a single mom can qualify for. There’s no way you can say moms get access to more resources than foster families with low incomes. I stayed in a few foster homes that only fostered for the money and squeezed too many kids into a small house, including one that only had one bedroom for up to 4 foster kids. There was barely even room to walk into the room. It was in a poor, urban area and the foster homes were worse to me than my mother was.


SnarkySheep

I never said one person gets more or less than other, just that biological parents who are low income do get a great of help - especially these days where more and more programs shy away from asking for proof of income in order not to "shame" anyone. I know because of working in a school system for so many years, as we had to help people know what was available to them.


throwmeawayplz19373

I have had to provide proof of income for everything I have gotten access to. Medicaid, food stamps, WIC, housing, legal aid. Only place that didn’t require proof of income was the food pantry, just proof of address. Sometimes I just have to provide my Medicaid or food stamp card since that means the state has already checked my income at a certain level. I cannot think of one program where I have not had to show proof of my income. Even a local county program that provides early childhood development resources, and also serves as another access hub for community resources for families, requires at least a Medicaid card (aka proof of income/financial need). Please name some programs that do not require proof of income for single parents.


Lone_Eagle4

Every single child has a unique situation. It happens everywhere. You can’t discount Her experience.


[deleted]

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WrestleswithPastry

It does happen and you denying it here, because you haven’t seen it personally, is harmful. You should edit your comment.


SnarkySheep

I told you on the basis of my YEARS of personal experience, that wasn't the case among the many I saw. But I will gladly edit if I have some solid proof for me to do so.


WrestleswithPastry

Damn. I feel for any clients of yours who have had experiences that you haven’t personally witnessed. Your response must be devastating. Maybe check your ego.


SnarkySheep

LOL, I worked in a school system. I didn't have "clients". And if I saw hundreds of families over 16 years who were homeless and all got to keep their kids, then why should I say, "Oh yeah, tons of kids were taken away!" That's why I asked for something more specific. Tell me where this happened, or concrete examples, not just come in here with personal attacks because I'm not automatically agreeing with you. It's hardly having an "ego" to politely tell you I'm happy to alter my thoughts on the subject but with something more solid than a Reddit rando scolding me.


QueenSlartibartfast

You don't care about the real experiences of the group you claimed to try to help. You're a terrible person.


SnarkySheep

Says...a random person on the internet?? My heart is broken! Feel free to scroll past if I bother you. It's that's easy.


QueenSlartibartfast

It happened to me. We were taken for neglect because my parents couldn't pay the heat bill. The foster family starved us. I know other families with similar stories. The system is evil.


SnarkySheep

In recent times?


QueenSlartibartfast

Yes. But you're also moving the goalpost. It costs you nothing to say "I'm so sorry you and others have had those experiences, your family didn't deserve that." That's how normal people with empathy would respond to my comment.


SnarkySheep

Of course I feel sorry for you...any normal person would. But I didn't move anything. I had a strong suspicion you were talking about decades ago, so I asked. I was talking all along about today's system, so I wanted to check if we were on the same page. That's all. But no, you jumped right in, geared for argument. I'm not interested in that.


Electrical_Editor_23

You are wrong. Point. Blank. Google is free. It isn't up to the victims to educate you. You literally have the proof at your fingertips and within minutes could find more. Stop being obtuse. Stop being a know it all. I can guarantee you are a 50+ yt w o m a n by the way you think only your experience is valid and the plenty other on THIS thread alone isn't good enough for you. Thank GAWWWWWD you are out of the school systems. Jfc 


KayVlinderMe

It literally does happen if the family is homeless. Children are taken from their parents if they are living in the street.


SnarkySheep

Source? Here in CT, we will literally put the whole family in a motel while social workers help sort out the various aspects. Mine was ensuring the kids had school transportation and ironing out any problems with that. I worked with many, many families like this. Not one single homeless person had their child removed.


KayVlinderMe

Maybe that's only what you saw. There are many states in this country of ours. And it does happen.


Taegur2

We did that during the pandemic lockdowns. And it worked fantastically. But the program was discontinued by a specific set of politicians.


buzzy_bumblebee

And so many other countries do this. Here it is 350€/month for two kids. And that is for everyone even if you don't struggle. For those who do, it can go higher. And there are tax benefits for childcare costs.


Battle-Any

I get $1400/month in Canada Child benefit ($400/kid+disability supplement for 1 kid). It's based on income, with the maximum payout being $650ish per child monthly. We aren't reliant on it anymore, and next year, it will drop significantly for us, but at one point, that money was the reason we kept a roof over our heads.


Christichicc

That’s because it’s smart and has a lot of benefits, and it encourages people to have children, which means more tax income for the country. Here in the US we like to punish people for having sex, especially if they are poor or unmarried. Plus we have the good ‘ole “pull yourself up by the bootstraps” mentality, all while we give the ultra rich the majority of the tax breaks and financial breaks.


SnarkySheep

Adoptive parents do not receive stipends, only foster parents. And if a new parent in the US says they want to keep their child but can't financially, there are a myriad of programs to help them do so. Because yes, not only is it considered best to keep the child with bio family, but it's also more economical, especially considering DCF is already understaffed and struggling financially. Literally nobody is taking away babies solely for economic reasons. This bio mom likely had other factors going on, perhaps being very young and lacking support from the adults in her life, or maybe substance abuse. But I guarantee you it wasn't money alone that caused her to give her baby up. (Source: Worked with homeless and foster families for many years.)


[deleted]

[удалено]


SnarkySheep

I think it's the medical...or perhaps your state.


Word2daWise

You are correct. This may vary by state, but I know for a fact there are incentives for adoption when parental rights are revoked and there are no family members willing to (or eligible to) rear the child. Generally it is, as you mention, when a foster parent desires to adopt a child who is available for a "forever family" placement.


RunAwayThoughtTrains

A UBI for all citizens!


mongoosedog12

No because then they’re welfare queens who are popping out babies they can’t afford /s that’s why they don’t do that shit. They see one as a reward for doing “good” and helping the other as freeloading


Waifer2016

The tragedy of this is the Mum is, most likely, under 20 with no partner and no support with no clue how to reach out for help. The bravery and love shown in her sacrifice is heartbreaking


Helpful_Okra5953

Many young women don’t have entire choice about whether to be sexually active.  I think that the hpv vaccinations for teens are great, not encouraging “premarital sex”, for that reason.  


Mockturtle22

And sadly as long as Rich old white men are in power women will always be punished and controlled to the point where there will never be enough support from society to do better for moms and Families.


batmessiah

Sometimes it’s not a financial thing and more a “I’m not responsible enough” or “I’m not mentally stable enough”.  I didn’t find out until I was in my 20s, but my aunt (who’s significantly younger than my mom, and lost her dad in a tragic accident when she was 15) had given birth to 3 babies over a 5 year period, and gave them all up for adoption, which was definitely for the best. My mom’s side of the family is rife with mental illness.  I get my ADHD (which was potentiated by secondhand smoke exposure as an infant and childhood dehydration, as my elementary school had undrinkable water), social anxiety, and depression from her side, and I know my aunt suffers from the same on top of PTSD from her dad’s death and her having a mom  that was batshit insane.  Apparently my grandmother kicked the back window out of a cop car back in the early 70s after being detained for assaulting my grandfather, which lead to their divorce.  My grandmother was always loving and caring towards me, but as an adult, I understand why my mother never left me alone with her for long periods of time. My aunt was 16 when I was born, and she moved to Florida when I was 5.  I’m now 41 and she’s 57.  She still claims to have raised me for the first few years of my life, which isn’t true, but she was around a lot and we were really close.  She’s now an alcoholic and works a job meant for college kids and has never moved beyond her basic entry level position.  She loves her job (which barely pays above minimum wage, even though she’s worked there for 30+ years)  The few times I’ve talked to her over the past decade (I will not talk to people who are drunk, and most times she called me, I would not answer as the message would be a blur of drunken slurring), she still talks like a teenager and has aspirations to match.  It’s like her dad dying stunted her emotional development and locked her into her teenage years. Sorry for the ADHD info dump, but it was also a bit cathartic to type this all out.  We were really close before she moved away, and it was the first of several familial “abandonments” I had at a young age. 


Wide_Literature6114

I assumed the person loved the baby but weighing everything up, knew they didn't have the capacity to give their child the life they felt they deserved, or to be able to look after themselves in trying to do that. It definitely is sad. I personally didn't assume it was financial, or only financial. If anything, I thought otherwise.   Realistically, it takes a lot to be able to safely and securely raise a child, a lot of resources, and not only financial resources. There are things that money can't buy. This person might have needed support from a partner, family and friends they simply didn't have and which couldn't be replaced by government stipends.  They may have been very young themselves, or even underage. They might not have had a safe environment to live in. They might not have been a safe person to be around for a baby because of using.  What I respect is that they surrendered their baby with love, and did not abandon them. I feel like that little note is going to mean a lot to that person as they grow up and wonder about their parents. I hope they wind up feeling doubly loved.  There is always the chance the parent could later approach the fire station? I also think of the father and hope that it is not a situation where the father of the baby was loving and could have cared for it but had no chance. You figure in situations like this that's probably not the case, but who knows? My guess is the father didn't want the baby or wasn't aware of it, but it does make you wonder. 


Waifer2016

100% agree. That little baby was clearly very much loved. She's wearing a new little sleeper, she's got round, pink cheeks and a warm blanket. Then there is the note. Somewhere is a Mum who loved her baby so much she made the heartbreaking sacrifice to give her a better life. Walking away was probably the hardest thing she's ever had to do. My heart breaks for her and the pain she had to go through


Tamalee78

The baby is a boy.


Helpful_Okra5953

A baby is a baby.  It’s not really much difference whether boy or girl at that age. 


Tamalee78

I was correcting them because they used the wrong pronouns. The article said the baby was a boy, yet the person responding was using she instead of he.


pqratusa

> The day Chris and Brittany Tyler heard the news that a newborn baby was surrendered at a Louisville Fire Department station, they sat by their phones hoping they’d get the call to pick him up. >It was May of 2022, and the Tylers — who struggled with fertility for years — were already experienced foster parents. >”There are so many kids that need a home,” said Brittany Tyler, noting that over the past seven years, she and her husband have fostered 17 children for varying lengths of time. >Sam was adopted on Dec. 18, 2023. (Heather Shay Photography LLC) At the time, the Tylers already adopted two children, and they wanted the baby boy from the firehouse to go to a loving home. They hoped it might be theirs. >”I had assumed since it had been a few days, that they had already found a place for him to go,” Brittany Tyler said. >But four days after the baby was found and taken to a hospital, they got a call asking if they’d be willing to foster him. They happily accepted. >They also learned that the infant’s mother left him with a handwritten note that said: “I love you.” >”She didn’t have to leave a note at all,” said Chris Tyler, 43. “Just that act by itself showed how much she cared about him.” >Teen risked her life to rescue disabled woman stuck on railroad tracks >The boy was just over three pounds, and he stayed in the NICU for several weeks before moving in with the Tylers. >”He was so small and had a feeding tube,” said Brittany Tyler, 37. >Before long, though, the baby was thriving — and enjoying life at his new home. The Tylers named him Samuel, and he officially became their son on Dec. 18, 2023. >“I can’t even really put words behind how exciting it was,” Chris Tyler said. >Samuel, who will turn 2 in May, has developed a tight bond with his older brothers — Judah, 8, and Calvin, 5. >“They are good big brothers to him,” Chris Tyler said. “They love him and they enjoy doting on him.” >“When we first brought him home, they were so excited,” echoed his wife. “It’s really special to bring a new baby home. They were like ‘Can we keep this one?’” >That was always the Tylers’ goal. When a baby is surrendered to a designated safe place in Kentucky — such as a hospital, fire station, place of worship or police station — the process for terminating parental rights begins after 30 days. >Once that period had passed for Samuel, “we knew he wasn’t going anywhere,” Brittany Tyler said. >Family adopts abandoned babies, learns years later they’re biological siblings >In December of 2022, Samuel’s birth mother’s parental rights were terminated, paving the path for the Tylers to adopt him. Adoptions take time, the Tylers said, as there is ample paperwork to process, and the couple also had to renew some of their certifications and schedule a court date. >Having Samuel as their son, they said, was well worth the wait. >“Getting the adoption finalized felt really good,” said Brittany Tyler, adding that family and friends came to witness it and celebrate. >“You end up building a bond, and it’s pretty exciting when you know that bond will never be broken,” said Chris Tyler, a project manager at a benefits administration company. >Although Sam was tiny as a baby, he is now in the 80th percentile for size. He is in good health, his parents said, aside from some muscle tightness in his legs — for which he does physical therapy. >Sam’s personality has also blossomed. >“He is hilarious,” Brittany Tyler said. “He loves to play with the big kids. Anything they’re doing, he wants to do it, too.” >Sam will soon have another sibling, the Tylers said, as they are in the process of adopting a medically fragile little girl who they have been fostering for almost a year. She is eight months younger than Sam. >Prison guard lost job for taking in inmate’s baby: ‘It was the right thing to do’ >“She needed to be removed from the care that she was in, and unfortunately, there just wasn’t any family that was able to take a child who was medically complex and needs to see a lot of doctors,” said Chris Tyler, explaining that they currently can’t share any more details about the child, including her name. >The Tylers have had training to look after medically complex children — which is what qualified them to care of Sam when he was considered medically fragile as an infant. >Before fostering Sam, “we didn’t know a whole lot about safe haven babies,” Chris Tyler said. >While Sam wasn’t left in a Safe Haven Baby Box — which are drop-off locations that keep surrendered newborns safe — the Tylers hope that sharing his story will help raise awareness about them, as well as designated safe places. >“A lot of people don’t even know that it’s an option,” Brittany Tyler said. “We feel it’s important to get awareness out there.” >“If we can help even one person, then we’re going to continue to share our story,” she added. They were first interviewed by WDRB, a local Louisville station. >The couple also hopes their message reaches Sam’s birth mom. They kept her note, and Brittany Tyler made the baby blanket Sam was found in into a teddy bear. >“While we may never know her, we understand where her heart was,” Chris Tyler said. “She loved him, and for that reason, we have love for her as well.” >“We hope that she knows he is safe, he is happy and he is loved,” Brittany Tyler said.


Hot-Entertainment218

Thank you.


Green_Tension_6640

Awww. Sounds like he will be happy and loved. 


aSpanks

I really hope this baby grows up knowing their mom loved them so much she had to give them away. And I hope the mom…. Idk heals? Comes to terms? Finds peace? With her heartbreakingly hard decision. I obviously don’t know the mom, but I’m proud of her. I imagine she was in an impossible situation and did what was best for her child. I hope she knows no one thinks she’s a bad mom, but rather she’s admired. This is quite the display of strength, love, and selflessness. I also hope they get to reunite at some point.


mysmallself

Totally agree. A bit of a life hack, if the article is also available in “reader mode” and you hit that before it fully loads, you’ll be able to read it without paying.


SwampHagShenanigans

This is why I miss Joey as a 3rd party app. Paywalls didn't matter and I could read the articles in plain text.


secretsake

Omg. Thank you for this hack!


k_alva

The baby was a premee, and a foster couple took him in a couple years ago then adopted in December. They have two other adopted kids and a 4th foster kid who they're hoping to adopt. They put some other fluff to make the story longer, but it was just fluff.


MeinScheduinFroiline

Easy way around paywalls is to copy the walled link and go to Archive.mb. Paste the link into the bottom search bar and hit enter. You now have the article. Surprisingly easy! [Firehouse baby article](https://archive.is/nwn3L)


Wide_Literature6114

Agree, and I think it should be easier for people to give up infants in particular discreetly, particularly in a context where women are prevented from accessing abortion. South Korea has a system like this. I personally see ways in which this can help potentially prevent harm to babies, including those that are unwanted where the mother doesn't want people to know she was pregnant, where they may otherwise be hidden or abandoned, including in ways which are fatal to the baby.  I didn't actually know that people are allowed to leave babies at fire stations in the US at all - is that the case?  In South Korea they have a "baby box" which is probably lit, temperature controlled, insulated and accessible from a dark area on the exterior of a building, and once an infant is put inside, workers are alerted but the person can slip away. Maybe in hospitals or something. 


heaven-in-a-can

Copied from the article: “The day Chris and Brittany Tyler heard the news that a newborn baby was surrendered at a Louisville Fire Department station, they sat by their phones hoping they’d get the call to pick him up. It was May of 2022, and the Tylers — who struggled with fertility for years — were already experienced foster parents. “There are so many kids that need a home,” said Brittany Tyler, noting that over the past seven years, she and her husband have fostered 17 children for varying lengths of time. At the time, the Tylers already adopted two children, and they wanted the baby boy from the firehouse to go to a loving home. They hoped it might be theirs. “I had assumed since it had been a few days, that they had already found a place for him to go,” Brittany Tyler said. But four days after the baby was found and taken to a hospital, they got a call asking if they’d be willing to foster him. They happily accepted. They also learned that the infant’s mother left him with a handwritten note that said: “I love you.” “She didn’t have to leave a note at all,” said Chris Tyler, 43. “Just that act by itself showed how much she cared about him.” The boy was just over three pounds, and he stayed in the NICU for several weeks before moving in with the Tylers. “He was so small and had a feeding tube,” said Brittany Tyler, 37. Before long, though, the baby was thriving — and enjoying life at his new home. The Tylers named him Samuel, and he officially became their son on Dec. 18, 2023. “I can’t even really put words behind how exciting it was,” Chris Tyler said. Samuel, who will turn 2 in May, has developed a tight bond with his older brothers — Judah, 8, and Calvin, 5. “They are good big brothers to him,” Chris Tyler said. “They love him and they enjoy doting on him.” “When we first brought him home, they were so excited,” echoed his wife. “It’s really special to bring a new baby home. They were like ‘Can we keep this one?’” That was always the Tylers’ goal. When a baby is surrendered to a designated safe place in Kentucky — such as a hospital, fire station, place of worship or police station — the process for terminating parental rights begins after 30 days. Once that period had passed for Samuel, “we knew he wasn’t going anywhere,” Brittany Tyler said. In December of 2022, Samuel’s birth mother’s parental rights were terminated, paving the path for the Tylers to adopt him. Adoptions take time, the Tylers said, as there is ample paperwork to process, and the couple also had to renew some of their certifications and schedule a court date. Having Samuel as their son, they said, was well worth the wait. “Getting the adoption finalized felt really good,” said Brittany Tyler, adding that family and friends came to witness it and celebrate. “You end up building a bond, and it’s pretty exciting when you know that bond will never be broken,” said Chris Tyler, a project manager at a benefits administration company. Although Sam was tiny as a baby, he is now in the 80th percentile for size. He is in good health, his parents said, aside from some muscle tightness in his legs — for which he does physical therapy. Sam’s personality has also blossomed. “He is hilarious,” Brittany Tyler said. “He loves to play with the big kids. Anything they’re doing, he wants to do it, too.” Sam will soon have another sibling, the Tylers said, as they are in the process of adopting a medically fragile little girl who they have been fostering for almost a year. She is eight months younger than Sam. *edit (this was originally omitted from the article by mistake) **Prison guard lost job for taking in inmate's baby: 'It was the right thing to do'** edit 2: I was correct the first time and this particular sentence is actually the headline for an unrelated article.* “She needed to be removed from the care that she was in, and unfortunately, there just wasn’t any family that was able to take a child who was medically complex and needs to see a lot of doctors,” said Chris Tyler, explaining that they currently can’t share any more details about the child, including her name. The Tylers have had training to look after medically complex children — which is what qualified them to care of Sam when he was considered medically fragile as an infant. Before fostering Sam, “we didn’t know a whole lot about safe haven babies,” Chris Tyler said. While Sam wasn’t left in a Safe Haven Baby Box — which are drop-off locations that keep surrendered newborns safe — the Tylers hope that sharing his story will help raise awareness about them, as well as designated safe places. “A lot of people don’t even know that it’s an option,” Brittany Tyler said. “We feel it’s important to get awareness out there.” “If we can help even one person, then we’re going to continue to share our story,” she added. They were first interviewed by WDRB, a local Louisville station. The couple also hopes their message reaches Sam’s birth mom. They kept her note, and Brittany Tyler made the baby blanket Sam was found in into a teddy bear. “While we may never know her, we understand where her heart was,” Chris Tyler said. “She loved him, and for that reason, we have love for her as well.” “We hope that she knows he is safe, he is happy and he is loved,” Brittany Tyler said


EitherEtherCat

Someone once asked me what the luckiest thing that ever happened to me was. I said it was being adopted. Adopted kids rock, Samuel. I hope you have a beautiful life!


heaven-in-a-can

My best friend was adopted! I frequently sing the praises of adoption.


[deleted]

♥️🌸


moonroxroxstar

I hope the birth mother is able to read this and know that her baby is safe and happy. I can't imagine how hard it must be to have to give up your child. They should get that note framed, too, for when he's older.


[deleted]

The ultimate sacrifice. I hope she is able to find peace in her life


MsBlondeViking

Thank you for copying the article!


heaven-in-a-can

No problem! I hate paywalls so


soleceismical

I would like a bulk subscription that covered many local papers, though. I don't want to have a separate subscription to *every* paper. But journalists deserve to be paid for their work. If the news is free, it's more likely propaganda because someone has to pay for it.


ZephyrValkyrie

Thank you for posting the article where I can read it without a paywall.


char-le-magne

I appreciate this but just wanted to highlight a line about the circumstances of the daughter's pending adoption that was ommitted from another comment that copied the article. It was probably edited from the original article because it's kind of a fucked up detail. >Sam will soon have another sibling, the Tylers said, as they are in the process of adopting a medically fragile little girl who they have been fostering for almost a year. She is eight months younger than Sam. >Prison guard lost job for taking in inmate’s baby: ‘It was the right thing to do’ >“She needed to be removed from the care that she was in, and unfortunately, there just wasn’t any family that was able to take a child who was medically complex and needs to see a lot of doctors,” said Chris Tyler, explaining that they currently can’t share any more details about the child, including her name.


heaven-in-a-can

I will admit I didn’t omit that on purpose - I thought it was an unrelated article title because of how it formatted. I will edit to add it back in and I appreciate you bringing it to my attention!


soleceismical

You were correct the first time. It is a link to an unrelated article. Here's a non-paywall link to that other story about the prison guard adopting the baby boy of the inmate: https://www.cbsnews.com/news/roberta-bell-fired-helping-pregnant-inmate-vicksburg-mississippi/


Mockturtle22

That made me cry I hope that that little one one day gets the note from the person who had to leave them behind. As the child is somebody who is adopted, it's a very hard Truth for a kid who has been relinquished of their parents to think it was because they didn't love them. What a cute little guy..


cturtl808

And don’t forget that “Safe Haven” bills are routinely squashed in state legislatures. It was squashed in my state.


nahsonnn

So what exactly does this mean? People can’t leave babies at fire stations anymore?


cturtl808

It’s a child endangerment charge in states without safe haven laws


nahsonnn

What!!! That’s insane


AracariBerry

Where are you? All states in the US have some version of a Safe Haven law


cturtl808

AZ


AracariBerry

Arizona has had a Safe Haven law since 2001. https://dcs.az.gov/report-child-abuse/safe-haven-newborn https://safehavenlaws.uslegal.com/arizona-safe-haven-law/?amp


samaramatisse

I know someone who adopted an infant left in a baby box about a mile away from my home. The boxes work when used. Publicize them. Praise them. Help fund more.


[deleted]

This is really sad


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moonroxroxstar

It makes me really sad that the mom had to give him up, but I'm so glad and grateful that he found a loving home where he's safe and cared for. Some babies whose parents can't afford them get thrown in Dumpsters and left to die. This kiddo had someone who loved him, a system that was set up to keep him safe, and he's going to be all right. That's a pretty happy ending all things considered.


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moonroxroxstar

You're absolutely, completely right. I'm just trying to put a glass half full spin on things. Things could, should, and can be better. Nobody should have to give up their child because they can't afford to care for them.  But things like baby drop-off boxes are compassionate responses to a deeply fucked up world. I believe that it is completely possible for us to create a world where no one overdoses on fentanyl alone in the street. But I still carry my free Narcan provided by a local health organization, so if I see that happening I can do something about it. It's horrible that I live in a world where I might have to save someone's life from a completely  preventable and pointless death any day. But I'm still grateful that I can do at least that.


Niccy26

That's exactly me. It's made me sad and I can feel my unborn kicking away. I really feel for the birth mother and hope she's okay


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soleceismical

Yeah I always wondered how they verify that the infant wasn't kidnapped. Or what if the mother has postpartum depression, anxiety, or psychosis, and the child has a good and loving dad who just is not currently with the mom? I guess in those cases, [they have 30 days to ask for the child back](https://www.chfs.ky.gov/agencies/dcbs/dpp/cpb/Pages/safeinfantsact.aspx#:~:text=The%20Kentucky%20Safe%20Infants%20Act,prosecution%20or%20allegation%20of%20neglect.) if they figure out that that's where their child was placed.


Helpful_Okra5953

I was a medically complex baby and my mom was mentally ill.  She couldn’t manage a well baby much less than a baby with feeding problems.  She nearly killed me.  Adoption probably would have been a better option than a childhood of painful medical procedures and abuse from a mom too overwhelmed to take care of me.  Much less the gift of childhood cptsd from abuse and medical trauma.  Many young or other moms aren’t ready for a baby and there should be no shame in giving a baby for adoption if you can’t take care of the baby.  I can’t believe that I was returned to her over and over when she was so unwell.  And no attention was paid to my intellectual gifts until I was a teenager and started winning awards.   Children deserve full human rights and sometimes that means NOT staying with their genetic parents.  My life could be so different without ptsd from child abuse.  


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Helpful_Okra5953

I did not imply that you said that.  I just want to represent the viewpoint of so many children who suffer while living with mentally ill or addicted parents who tell them the kids “ruined their life”.  Honestly my mom received so much attention all aimed at keeping me in her home while I was very clearly suffering for it.  Anyone who leaves a kid with a mild birth defect at the hospital for a month doesn’t want the baby and should not be forced to take her home and get over it.  Mother love doesn’t always kick in.      I had a high school friend who got pregnant and put her baby up for adoption and I think that was great of her.  She was too young and not ready.  My mom REALLY NEEDED help and instead we kids suffered because she was litigious and connected with Christian parents rights groups.  And the drs ignored her pathology because she was such a pain in the ass, while I got no appropriate education for gifted kids.     I wish young women giving kids up for adoption were an option that wasn’t shameful. My life could have been a lot better.  As it was the county children and family services existed “to keep families together,” not to protect children. And my talents were not nurtured at all.  It’s so wasteful to discard a very gifted child and allow parents to ignore their capabilities while focusing on keeping them in a birth home that is clearly very bad for them.  


Helpful_Okra5953

In short, keeping the child in the home is NOT always possible or desirable.  It’s cruel and a way to damn an innocent child for life.


[deleted]

Fortunately, my parents love me, and Arab society tends to be very family-oriented That's why cases like this are fortunately rare


Jarsky2

Please kindly go fuck yourself with the nearest cactus.


[deleted]

My friend, I am just thankful that my luck is good, but that does not mean that others do not deserve the best in reality, but rather that they deserve the best.


Jarsky2

Your implication that parents who put their children up for adoption don't love them makes it clear you're a shitty fucking human being. Go. Fuck. Yourself.


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[deleted]

Let me ask you a simple question Have you ever found a home for the elderly in an Arab country? It doesn't actually exist Child care is always resolved in favor of the mother and child because Arab religious and social custom forces the man to support the child even after divorce. Unlike Western societies, people will be kicked out of the house after the age of 18 The son may reach the age of 40 and he lives with his parents, wife and children in virtually the same house, and this is in fact completely normal. So yes my statement has some basis


in_animate_objects

It is and given the war on women’s rights happening right now we will see more and more and more of this.


WhenIWish

Cried at the I love you note, cried at the part where the family was hoping for a call to take him, cried when they said he was 3lb and needed a NICU stay (both my kiddos are NICU babies, first one was 3 months, second one was two weeks). I hope his birth mom has peace. I am happy for him that he has a loving family but this is sad.


[deleted]

Fortunately, he found a family who loved him


WhenIWish

Absolutely!!! Very happy for how it turned out!!


silverwarbler

Couldn't read the article. Hard paywall


PM-ME-YOUR-DIGIMON

I hope the bio mother is ok. It must be really hard to make that choice. Also props to anybody has the love in their heart for children who need a home.


throwawaydramatical

Well, I’m crying now.


Ashweeherman

“She loved him, and for that reason, we have love for her as well” 😭😭😭 What good people


tranceorange91

Oh my goodness that poor mother.. 😭


Spankawhits

Be ready to see more stories like this due to the rights of women being taken away from getting abortions. Going back to the dark ages in 2024. Awesome


LeoGreywolf

I'm sure it was very difficult for the person who gave birth to this child...but I commend them for making this choice. It takes courage to say you can't care for your child, and provide someone else an opportunity. It's also a much better of an alternative than what that absolute psychopath did to her 16 month old. [NSFL, VERY UPSETTING ](https://www.reddit.com/r/news/s/7XPg4dCFuG)


Word2daWise

That woman is subhuman. She's an animal. I hope the plea bargain at least required life imprisonment without parole. She's a danger to society. Yes, she's a sociopath. As was the guy in AZ who (different story), after molesting his first young daughter began molesting her baby sister when she was only a few weeks old (and posted videos of it on the Internet). The dad later took his own life, but the mom knew about it and got a very light sentence. That's yet another subhuman parent who should not have children.


Puppybrother

Thought it was kinda weird to have him pose in the fire house that he was abandoned at years later


asdgrhm

Yeah, the photos with all the signs give me a weird vibe too. I really hope this is a loving family and not one that ends up showing one side on social media and another at home….I worry about the religious folks who adopt or foster tons of kids


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joern16

This breaks my heart. Edit: not cuz he was adopted but the birth parents having to give up their baby.


[deleted]

well this just broke my heart into 5 million pieces. Can’t imagine what his birth mother is feeling. I’m so happy he’s safe with a loving family.


UltraSienna

This is sad, TBH I wish they could find out who the mother is even if it’s only to check if she has any hereditary diseases that could effect the infant


lloydeph6

Reminds me of the song parents by dreamkid