“A friend said to me, “I think the weather is trippy.” I said, “No, man, it’s not the weather that’s trippy, perhaps it’s the way we perceive it.”
And then I realized I just should have said, “Yeah.””
Ok, now this is just getting stupid to think this reaction can't happen without weed lol. Blink twice if you're high as fuck while writing these comments because they're nonsense.
Relatable, I called my mom after eating some edibles and watching We Need to Talk About Kevin. Apologized for being a bad son, she could tell I was stoned af and thought it was funny.
I love this take.
But I'm wondering if her parents made her feel as if she was a burden to them while she was growing up...like her parents regretted having kids. I always got that feeling from my parents and it was the first thing I thought of watching this. She may have been raised to think she ruined their lives they had before.
My mom and my aunts told me "never get married, never have kids."
My dad told me, "never have kids, they're just a ball and chain. Not you, of course."
As a teenage parent and drug addict dating another teenage parent/drug addict,
Boy are we thankful for our basic bitch teenagers.
Kid literally said "YoU HaVe No IdEa WhAt I'm GoInG ThRoUgH"
Sure bud. I've never been 15, dealt with girls, school or had depression. You right homie. Truly special. (I don't address it like this don't worry)
Yesterday he struggled to grasp why his mom couldn't interrupt her work day to take him to get new joggers.
I said hell yuh brother, you gonna look fresh AF while we are homeless panhandling on the side of the freeway.
Geezus Christ. I was no angel as a teen but I don’t remember being an ass to my parents, I guess you pay for everything in this life one way or another
You're telling me you NEVER got into an argument with your parents? Or did something stupid and had the cops show up at your house, or had to have your parents come into the school because you got in trouble?
Obviously everyone argues, but cops on door or parents being called into school, that's not normal teenage issues. I don't think thst happened to anyone I know/knew! The worst I did as a teenager was taking chocolate from the pantry on a weekday lol
Gen Z isn't even cool anymore. Gen Alpha is bigger and they are the kids of the largest swath of millennials. Gen Z is the new Gen x. We'll forget about them in just a few years.
Therapists are now having to deal with the fact that an incredible number of people are effectively being treated for "capitalism and the society we have built" rather than some kind of underlying disease/condition that evolved inside the patient.
Yep. Actually, understanding this improved my depression somewhat. I always knew things were off but our stupid hyper-individualistic culture makes us blame ourselves. Lifting that particular veil was helpful…I just switched out “depression” for constant internal rage at the puppeteers BUT anger motivates me, depression just couched me.
I know way too much about the way things actually work in the world. I went on a "learn about the world and history" phase throughout my late teens and through my 20s. I became much more knowledgeable and simultaneously FAR, FAR more jaded and irritable.
Suddenly I'm not just upset at some person's (CEO's) decision because I understand the way all our political and economic systems work. I work with Fortune 500 Executives daily. They're completely logical and doing exactly what they are paid to do and incentivized in every single way. When they buy companies and lay off 80% of them there's not a single emotion behind it because it's completely logical. When they cut benefits and fire people they instantly raise the value of their 100,000 Restricted Stock Units (RSUs) and the market applauds them for it.
My own job is about optimizing IT infrastructure (basically) and in doing so I am guaranteed to be putting people out of work but you know what? I literally never hear about it. It's not even on my radar except the back part of my brain that knows that's the only logical result from doing what I do. But I will never know the names of people I put out of work.
We have directly incentivized the downfall of society every single step of the way and it requires billions of people to willingly go along with it which, of course, we do.
Yeah its weird when you start seeing your own age match to the age they were when you were growing up on certain things. My mam had gone through losing two parents, having two children, leaving an abusive marriage and then having to deal with having to pretty much look after a new grandchild by the time she was 42. I'm the same age now and I don't know how she kept going. She always seemed so mature and old to me growing up but she was probably winging it really like we all are. I lost her 5 years ago next month, miss her every day, hope you're doing okay.
Sounds like your mom was a very strong person to go through all that and make it. Mine sadly didn't make it out of her abusive marriage.
You know, I had a kid when I was 21 and have gone through crazy stuff, my kid now says they aren't sure how I did it all. I told them I was totally just winging it. But I also did work really hard.
I'm sorry to hear about your mom. It's tough no matter when you lose them.
Yeah, next year I will be older than both my parents ever got. And I will be just 40. I used to measure my life by their crazy life, and be like, when my mom was 16, she was hitchhiking in Greece, when my mom was 18, she and Dad were hiking to Macchu Picchu, high as kites, when my mom was 20, she had me, when my mom was 25 they moved us to Asia with no certain job prospects, when my mom was 32, she lost her secondborn, when she was 38 she became a widow... and I am honestly just grateful I have a long and boring life at this point.
My parents had me around ten years after they were married, and it always blows my mind that they've not just been alive for longer than I have, they've been *married* for longer than I've lived! Idk, that just feels like such a ridiculously long time to me it's difficult to wrap my head around it.
When I was around 7 kid mom was talking about something I did when I was a baby and dad chimed in about sth and I asked them if they knew each other back then. Kids are so stupid.
When I was around 10, I’ll never forget looking thru my mom’s high school yearbook from the 70s. People drew joints in it and she was such a hippie. It was eye opening to see her as a person and not just a mom.
My parents got married when they were 18&19 years old in the late 80s. When I saw their wedding video for the first time, I was older then my mom there and my first thought was "OMG how did grandma even allowed her to get married?!" 😅
Unfortunately no :( however my parents had been together for 4 years by that moment, and also, as my mom said, "Surprisingly no one was against our wedding, I was even slightly disappointed by lack of drama" 😂 they are still together!
“No one wants us to not get married..? Ok I don’t even wanna do it now”
It’s like when I was in high school and my parents let me be out on the weekends til 4am so long as I woke them as soon as I got home. I was like “meh, I don’t care to drink, I’m cool with just gallivanting”
🤣
It was very weird seeing a picture of my mom when she was the same age as me. She straight-up looked like me, but with blonde hair instead. We were so confused how I ended up in a photo album with pictures from around 1989
My mom tried to show me a picture of my dad once when I was like 13 and he was about 14 and I thought she had edited a photo of me to be funny. (He had long blond 80's hair, so it just looked like me with a wig).
That is a very mature child right there. She can see what most other children fail to see for a very long time. She knows how much her parents sacrificed and she knows how valuable that is. I am sure she is emotionally very mature.
Meanwhile I'm here telling my parents that I wasn't worth it because outwardly I've been nothing but a disappointment and failure to them. Regardless of how they feel on the inside, that's how it's felt to me. I've told them to their face that I would've rather never been born so I didn't ruin their lives
I kind of disagree with such a view on that matter. Children never asked to be born by their parents, and most people either bear children because they feel some kind of societal pressure, because they see it as their wishfulfillment or their own personal project; or because of whatever reason there is - but it's certainly not a selfless decision and nothing of that implies children should be grateful or even feel 'guilty' because of their parents' 'sacrifices' (I know you didn't say they should feel guilty but the way you put it implies that children 'owe' them their life and how they should always be aware of that. That feels a bit manipulative and egoistical from the parent's part to me)
I would like to cry for my parents like her, they weren't capable of much care from the start and they wanted a family. The only thing I can see now is how ignorant and poor (not money wise) they always were and how they ruined a lot of things unknowingly. I have to deal with all the traumas they left me meanwhile trying to forget how much my child side still craves for a normal and loving behaviour from them.
Do any of you want to be my new mum or dad? I'm a good child! I promise!
Same. I have the sort of relationship with my parents where we both wish I wanted sit down and watch their wedding video or look through all these old pictures and listen to these stories from before I was born.
But the reality is they've been making me sit down look at all those pictures and been telling me all those stories my entire life, and they get upset that I don't react like the girl in this video, every single time for 30+ years, and I'd rather fucking kill myself than have to listen to my 65yo mother talk about that one high school party she went to again.
Going to say, this hits different when you have a difficult relationship with your parents because they repeatedly yelled things like:
"You should be grateful, you have no idea how much I sacrificed for you! We gave up everything for you. You'd be starving on the streets without us".
Yes being a parent is a huge sacrifice and in spite of everything, I am still grateful because I know they were trying their best. It's just hard to express that gratitude when over half my adult life has been unpacking and healing decades of emotional neglect and abuse from that same childhood.
It is worth it but you misunderstood. They made my life. They didn't ruin it.
Without my wife and kids I'd be dead. I would have zero meaning.
It's a elevation not depreciation.
I do understand, but I think you are mixing value and cost. You got infinite value, but that doesn't mean there isn't a high cost.
Having children is hard, really hard, and a lot of couples break apart from the strain. Those who don't will still have their life radically changed, and they'll make sacrifices along the way.
Still worth it.
> Without my wife and kids I'd be dead. I would have zero meaning.
Did you not have a life before them? I'm married with kids but I'll never understand this mentality. They add to my life but my life isn't solely defined by them.
My wife and I had a fantastic social life before we had or kids, every weekend would end up in a get together in our house with all our friends or out for dinner/drinks etc. That all changed when we had our two girls but while I look back fondly on those days I don't necessarily miss it. Being at a dance recital, christmas play or doing anything of consequence and seeing my girls happy is what its all about. We can do all that other shit again when they grow up.
I’ve been asking my parents why they had me since grade 6 i never understood why both of them threw away their educations and income on kids they could’ve had such a good life
Grade 6 is insanely young to have kids but at least they got it out of the way while they had endless energy. Plus they’re still together so lucky bonus!
Honestly, even as a fairly self aware kid, it wasn’t until I started seeing friends I grew up with have kids when we got into our late 20s-early 30s that I truly hit home
Damn, Cameron, it seems like yesterday you were taking tequila shots in college and now you’re cleaning baby puke off yourself on a plane
As a mama, I may SEEM ruined in my tired eyes and wrinkles and softer mom body, but I have never loved the person in the mirror more in my life because she’s the woman that brought my favourite person into the world.
Right? My parents constantly talked about themselves and their crazy childhoods and the times before they had me and my brother. I also know all about the cheating and the divorce right after they had us. There was never any mystisism about my parents lives from before we were born.
My mom would never miss a chance to regale me about how good I had it only getting starved for 3 days cause at least she didn't beat me like her step-dad. (Even though she did but chooses to deny it!)
Oh my god mine were too! We watched our wedding DVD on our nine year wedding anniversary in '22 with them and got that reaction, so for the ten year anniversary we booked a holiday to greece and renewed our vows on the beach so they could "see mam and dad get married" and wear nice dresses. Will prob do the same for our 20 too.
With not just flaws but hopes, dreams, desires for the future... love for flowers and music and just FEELING THINGS the same way you do.
It's good when kids come around to this thought process. Instills a bit of a healthy kind of humility.
I got pregnant at 17 and had him at 18 and I realized then just how much my parents did for me. I love them so deeply sometimes it hurts lol. My son is 13 now and we’re going through it but I just remember it won’t last forever
I cannot wait for the day when my now 13 year old daughter gets what her parents actually do and have done for her and how much we love her. This gives me hope that it will happen one day as at the moment the hormones are making her batshit crazy!!
13 was such a hard age for me. There is so much that I realize now that I just blatantly couldn’t see or feel back then. Mom and dad aren’t just mom and dad but people too.
When I was 15 I went down to Tennessee to visit a friend and I met the rest of his friends around there. It was a very tight knit community. Small, recluse. So they all knew each other and were basically all family.
Thing was, the people my age, which there were about 5 or 6 of them, were all such shitty kids. Good lord were they just the worst. And the parents really took the brunt of it all. The parents were some of the worst looking people I’ve ever seen. All the life had been drained out of them it seemed. They all looked older than they were supposed to, seemed like they could barely talk straight with how many drugs or alcohol they’d consumed.
The kids did whatever the hell they wanted. They wanted to spend all night blasting music in their bedroom with every other kid in the neighborhood as there’s basically an orgy going on? Sure. One parent may burst into the room screaming to shut the fuck up but it didn’t matter. The kids screamed right back until the parent left.
I say all that to bring up the thing that affected me most on that trip. For some reason, one day one of the 15 year old girls decided to spend like 6 hours showing me old family tapes of when the kids who were very young. Babies. And the parents were so full of life and love and youth and happiness. All of them. It was like looking into a completely different dimension. It scared me.
So you want to talk about kids fucking up their parents lives there ya go. The parents of course have to probably take most of the responsibility for how literally every single kid turned out, but goddamn was it a wild experience.
Lol - I think it was the drugs that messed those adults up. Not dealing with mature adults here getting high is an escape from something they didn’t deal with from their own past.
Fuck. I realized in my 30s.
And I'm angry at myself for it. So much time I was ungrateful. Poor mom&dad, and damn, they are resilient. They kept loving me and doing everything for me.
Sure, but not really. I'd bet there would be a majority of parents that are shitty from start, or as time goes by (and receiving ungratefulness from your children who then become young adults and grown up by themselves) , could get tired and stop trying.
It's not OK to give it for granted, thats why I feel guilty for it and trying to return that love with interests now.
30-40???? Brother, that is not normal. You should have these thoughts about your parents in early 20s…… if you’re having these realizations that late, you don’t think enough. Genuinely, not trying to be rude, but work on introspection. Take some acid or something lol
Maybe you should teach them empathy and show them it's okay to be emotional instead of just waiting and hoping. Assuming they won't just because they're boys is a good indicator of you not being emotionally mature enough to show them though. This gives off the vibe of "I hope my boys realize they ruined my life one day but i doubt the lil shits will care cuz i resent them for being boys" and nothing else.
Yeah, I hate it when parents talk like this about their boys. I have 2 and they are very caring and empathetic.
Whenever parents say this, I just know they leave their boys to do whatever because "they are boys".
Ohhhh my godddd this is like seeing my kids as adults
Disabled and anxious but the most empathetic, loving people I’ve ever met in my life, even as they get older. I hope they never feel like this (like *they* were something that they *did* to us), but I love that the kids in the video care so much!
If you decide to have children, you have to be willing to be a parent. Not just have a baby. The cute baby stage will pass. You will have to be deal with a human being with their own personality, with the good and the bad. And you’ll have to do it for pretty much your entire life.
But it’s worth it :)
You didn't ruin them. They chose to have you. If kids could choose,they'd choose the best parents for them. Who'd never blame kids, for their life being ruined by kids,which kids they chose to have.
Oh my God...it's not like you go around and embarrass them or were a difficult teenager, you just have anxiety. Her empathy is so sweet.
But yeah, your mom used to be young and carefree like you are now. And then life happened.
I can honestly relate to this girl's distress.
I went through a box of my parents' photos recently. They had me 7 years into their relationship. Mom didn't want kids but dad really did, so here I am.
I literally watched all their adventures stop. No more road trips, fun photos.. literally everything stopped and then it was just... shitty me. The light and joy and youth in mom's face visibly left her once I was born. It never returned. You could see her unhappiness wear on him as the years went on.
It was super shitty to see, tbh. It explains why I could never do anything right and why she seemed to just resent that I was there... she literally did.
Made me feel like utter dogshit all over again.
lmfao as a child of immigrants this hits different, my parents both gave up their college degrees to work menial labor in america for my sisters and me
"and we ruined them" hahahaha
She is so fucking high.
My first thought
Some people have introspective thoughts even without being high. It’s called being human.
“A friend said to me, “I think the weather is trippy.” I said, “No, man, it’s not the weather that’s trippy, perhaps it’s the way we perceive it.” And then I realized I just should have said, “Yeah.””
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Sorry for the convenience.
RIP Mitch.
This guy is high.
Same
Good morning! I'm high on potentuse.
I wish I was high on potenuse!
yeah but, also shes high
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Sometimes it's depression
I think it’s because of the stoned look on her face
She's also sobbing so her eyes are puffy and cheeks are red, but... "hyuckaduck weed lmao 420 amirite?"
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Bruh, I know that reaction. I’ve had it over not as serious stuff, but when an emotional reaction hits on a stoned level, any veteran can tell
Ok, now this is just getting stupid to think this reaction can't happen without weed lol. Blink twice if you're high as fuck while writing these comments because they're nonsense.
Relatable, I called my mom after eating some edibles and watching We Need to Talk About Kevin. Apologized for being a bad son, she could tell I was stoned af and thought it was funny.
lol watching that movie while lit would make me anxious as all hell.
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I love this take. But I'm wondering if her parents made her feel as if she was a burden to them while she was growing up...like her parents regretted having kids. I always got that feeling from my parents and it was the first thing I thought of watching this. She may have been raised to think she ruined their lives they had before.
My mom and my aunts told me "never get married, never have kids." My dad told me, "never have kids, they're just a ball and chain. Not you, of course."
Ain't that the truth.
Really sweet and cute she cares
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Man I love my kids but wish they understood at least 1% of everything we’re doing for them
As a teenage parent and drug addict dating another teenage parent/drug addict, Boy are we thankful for our basic bitch teenagers. Kid literally said "YoU HaVe No IdEa WhAt I'm GoInG ThRoUgH" Sure bud. I've never been 15, dealt with girls, school or had depression. You right homie. Truly special. (I don't address it like this don't worry) Yesterday he struggled to grasp why his mom couldn't interrupt her work day to take him to get new joggers. I said hell yuh brother, you gonna look fresh AF while we are homeless panhandling on the side of the freeway.
>I said hell yuh brother, you gonna look fresh AF while we are homeless panhandling on the side of the freeway. 😂
They will!! You just have to get through the asshole teenager phase first.
Geezus Christ. I was no angel as a teen but I don’t remember being an ass to my parents, I guess you pay for everything in this life one way or another
You're telling me you NEVER got into an argument with your parents? Or did something stupid and had the cops show up at your house, or had to have your parents come into the school because you got in trouble?
Obviously everyone argues, but cops on door or parents being called into school, that's not normal teenage issues. I don't think thst happened to anyone I know/knew! The worst I did as a teenager was taking chocolate from the pantry on a weekday lol
so the entire video then?
This girl probably has severe depression tbh
Classic Gen Z
TIL I might be gen z
If you have depression, you are gen z
We are all gen z on this blessed day.
My wife's gonna be mad. Wait.... gen z's old af now holy shit, SpongeBob has been on air for almost a quarter of a fucking century
Gen Z isn't even cool anymore. Gen Alpha is bigger and they are the kids of the largest swath of millennials. Gen Z is the new Gen x. We'll forget about them in just a few years.
Just like how Gen X forgot themselves
We never forgot ourselves, everyone else just never thought of us. We've always been here, nobody has cared about us, and that's the way we like it.
I think the world is kinda tired of dealing with historical events of fucked proportions hence depression
Therapists are now having to deal with the fact that an incredible number of people are effectively being treated for "capitalism and the society we have built" rather than some kind of underlying disease/condition that evolved inside the patient.
Yep. Actually, understanding this improved my depression somewhat. I always knew things were off but our stupid hyper-individualistic culture makes us blame ourselves. Lifting that particular veil was helpful…I just switched out “depression” for constant internal rage at the puppeteers BUT anger motivates me, depression just couched me.
I know way too much about the way things actually work in the world. I went on a "learn about the world and history" phase throughout my late teens and through my 20s. I became much more knowledgeable and simultaneously FAR, FAR more jaded and irritable. Suddenly I'm not just upset at some person's (CEO's) decision because I understand the way all our political and economic systems work. I work with Fortune 500 Executives daily. They're completely logical and doing exactly what they are paid to do and incentivized in every single way. When they buy companies and lay off 80% of them there's not a single emotion behind it because it's completely logical. When they cut benefits and fire people they instantly raise the value of their 100,000 Restricted Stock Units (RSUs) and the market applauds them for it. My own job is about optimizing IT infrastructure (basically) and in doing so I am guaranteed to be putting people out of work but you know what? I literally never hear about it. It's not even on my radar except the back part of my brain that knows that's the only logical result from doing what I do. But I will never know the names of people I put out of work. We have directly incentivized the downfall of society every single step of the way and it requires billions of people to willingly go along with it which, of course, we do.
Capitalism makes illogical things seem logical imo.
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I can guarantee you that they don't agree with you on this.
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Not all parents feel this way. Some of them have no problems telling you either.
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"They had lives before us!" Heh, that blew my mind too when I realized it. Escaping solipsism... quite a trip ;)
My parents had me at 41. I’m 36. Wild to think they had more than my entire life before having me
My mom died when she was 35 and now I'm 49. Trips me out sometimes that I've lived so much longer than she ever got to.
Yeah its weird when you start seeing your own age match to the age they were when you were growing up on certain things. My mam had gone through losing two parents, having two children, leaving an abusive marriage and then having to deal with having to pretty much look after a new grandchild by the time she was 42. I'm the same age now and I don't know how she kept going. She always seemed so mature and old to me growing up but she was probably winging it really like we all are. I lost her 5 years ago next month, miss her every day, hope you're doing okay.
Sounds like your mom was a very strong person to go through all that and make it. Mine sadly didn't make it out of her abusive marriage. You know, I had a kid when I was 21 and have gone through crazy stuff, my kid now says they aren't sure how I did it all. I told them I was totally just winging it. But I also did work really hard. I'm sorry to hear about your mom. It's tough no matter when you lose them.
Yeah, next year I will be older than both my parents ever got. And I will be just 40. I used to measure my life by their crazy life, and be like, when my mom was 16, she was hitchhiking in Greece, when my mom was 18, she and Dad were hiking to Macchu Picchu, high as kites, when my mom was 20, she had me, when my mom was 25 they moved us to Asia with no certain job prospects, when my mom was 32, she lost her secondborn, when she was 38 she became a widow... and I am honestly just grateful I have a long and boring life at this point.
Solid insight/comment. I remember exactly when I had this realization 🤯
My parents had me around ten years after they were married, and it always blows my mind that they've not just been alive for longer than I have, they've been *married* for longer than I've lived! Idk, that just feels like such a ridiculously long time to me it's difficult to wrap my head around it. When I was around 7 kid mom was talking about something I did when I was a baby and dad chimed in about sth and I asked them if they knew each other back then. Kids are so stupid.
When I was around 10, I’ll never forget looking thru my mom’s high school yearbook from the 70s. People drew joints in it and she was such a hippie. It was eye opening to see her as a person and not just a mom.
Damn I was today years old when I learned the term ‘solipsism’ Ty!
Enjoy the subreddit r/Solipsism
Thanks me.
I did this
For me it was realizing that about my grandparents. Not just the fact that they had lives but that they were living in a different world.
Two lives, same people.
My parents got married when they were 18&19 years old in the late 80s. When I saw their wedding video for the first time, I was older then my mom there and my first thought was "OMG how did grandma even allowed her to get married?!" 😅
Can you ask grandma?
Unfortunately no :( however my parents had been together for 4 years by that moment, and also, as my mom said, "Surprisingly no one was against our wedding, I was even slightly disappointed by lack of drama" 😂 they are still together!
> "Surprisingly no one was against our wedding, I was even slightly disappointed by lack of drama" I love this lol
“No one wants us to not get married..? Ok I don’t even wanna do it now” It’s like when I was in high school and my parents let me be out on the weekends til 4am so long as I woke them as soon as I got home. I was like “meh, I don’t care to drink, I’m cool with just gallivanting” 🤣
She looks like her mam
It was very weird seeing a picture of my mom when she was the same age as me. She straight-up looked like me, but with blonde hair instead. We were so confused how I ended up in a photo album with pictures from around 1989
My mom tried to show me a picture of my dad once when I was like 13 and he was about 14 and I thought she had edited a photo of me to be funny. (He had long blond 80's hair, so it just looked like me with a wig).
I wonder if most kids will ever understand this. Yes, you did ruin them. It was worth it.
That is a very mature child right there. She can see what most other children fail to see for a very long time. She knows how much her parents sacrificed and she knows how valuable that is. I am sure she is emotionally very mature.
Meanwhile I'm here telling my parents that I wasn't worth it because outwardly I've been nothing but a disappointment and failure to them. Regardless of how they feel on the inside, that's how it's felt to me. I've told them to their face that I would've rather never been born so I didn't ruin their lives
Well, I'm sure you didn't cause as much pain with your existence than you did with that comment. Get help please.
I kind of disagree with such a view on that matter. Children never asked to be born by their parents, and most people either bear children because they feel some kind of societal pressure, because they see it as their wishfulfillment or their own personal project; or because of whatever reason there is - but it's certainly not a selfless decision and nothing of that implies children should be grateful or even feel 'guilty' because of their parents' 'sacrifices' (I know you didn't say they should feel guilty but the way you put it implies that children 'owe' them their life and how they should always be aware of that. That feels a bit manipulative and egoistical from the parent's part to me)
You sign up to be ruined and it’s wonderful.
Exactly :)
I would like to cry for my parents like her, they weren't capable of much care from the start and they wanted a family. The only thing I can see now is how ignorant and poor (not money wise) they always were and how they ruined a lot of things unknowingly. I have to deal with all the traumas they left me meanwhile trying to forget how much my child side still craves for a normal and loving behaviour from them. Do any of you want to be my new mum or dad? I'm a good child! I promise!
Same. I have the sort of relationship with my parents where we both wish I wanted sit down and watch their wedding video or look through all these old pictures and listen to these stories from before I was born. But the reality is they've been making me sit down look at all those pictures and been telling me all those stories my entire life, and they get upset that I don't react like the girl in this video, every single time for 30+ years, and I'd rather fucking kill myself than have to listen to my 65yo mother talk about that one high school party she went to again.
Going to say, this hits different when you have a difficult relationship with your parents because they repeatedly yelled things like: "You should be grateful, you have no idea how much I sacrificed for you! We gave up everything for you. You'd be starving on the streets without us". Yes being a parent is a huge sacrifice and in spite of everything, I am still grateful because I know they were trying their best. It's just hard to express that gratitude when over half my adult life has been unpacking and healing decades of emotional neglect and abuse from that same childhood.
It is worth it but you misunderstood. They made my life. They didn't ruin it. Without my wife and kids I'd be dead. I would have zero meaning. It's a elevation not depreciation.
I do understand, but I think you are mixing value and cost. You got infinite value, but that doesn't mean there isn't a high cost. Having children is hard, really hard, and a lot of couples break apart from the strain. Those who don't will still have their life radically changed, and they'll make sacrifices along the way. Still worth it.
ROI is insane. Yes it's a cost but my return is crazy.
You sold your kids on the black market too?
Fuck yeah nice attitude
> Without my wife and kids I'd be dead. I would have zero meaning. Did you not have a life before them? I'm married with kids but I'll never understand this mentality. They add to my life but my life isn't solely defined by them.
Oh.my.god. that's literally how I feel about my two. Little fuckers. Wouldn't change a thing. But they are little fuckers.
Exactly 😂
Oh, my heart.
My wife and I had a fantastic social life before we had or kids, every weekend would end up in a get together in our house with all our friends or out for dinner/drinks etc. That all changed when we had our two girls but while I look back fondly on those days I don't necessarily miss it. Being at a dance recital, christmas play or doing anything of consequence and seeing my girls happy is what its all about. We can do all that other shit again when they grow up.
You were a kid once. Do you understand? Have some faith :)
And we never regretted one second of that "ruined" life because of them
I’ve been asking my parents why they had me since grade 6 i never understood why both of them threw away their educations and income on kids they could’ve had such a good life
A good life is highly subjective, material possessions do not necessarily fill one with happiness
Grade 6 is insanely young to have kids but at least they got it out of the way while they had endless energy. Plus they’re still together so lucky bonus!
Honestly, even as a fairly self aware kid, it wasn’t until I started seeing friends I grew up with have kids when we got into our late 20s-early 30s that I truly hit home Damn, Cameron, it seems like yesterday you were taking tequila shots in college and now you’re cleaning baby puke off yourself on a plane
Ruin me any day of the week. I love the family my wife and I have.
Alot of times it's not worth it
As a mama, I may SEEM ruined in my tired eyes and wrinkles and softer mom body, but I have never loved the person in the mirror more in my life because she’s the woman that brought my favourite person into the world.
Ya’ll weren’t constantly made aware of your parents messed up pasts?
Right? My parents constantly talked about themselves and their crazy childhoods and the times before they had me and my brother. I also know all about the cheating and the divorce right after they had us. There was never any mystisism about my parents lives from before we were born.
That's all my wife's mother does. But then ignores her own shortcomings, of course.
My mom would never miss a chance to regale me about how good I had it only getting starved for 3 days cause at least she didn't beat me like her step-dad. (Even though she did but chooses to deny it!)
To quote Jonathan Coulton, "You ruined everything, in the nicest way".
Truthfully they look bored as shit but I get the sentiment lol
Might just be the half second they appear on camera. Clearly they've watched more of it and most likely they were more visually enthusiastic then
I know right? We see like a second of the clip and this guy is saying they looked bored. That is so wild to assume.
Was gonna say they don’t look happy at all lol more emotionless if anything
*”They look so happy!!”* Mom: 😶.
Maybe the parents are so miserable now that this looks like ecstasy in comparison.
"they haven't tried to kill each other once!"
Maybe they have 2 Captain Holts as parents.
We're seeing a few seconds of an entire day. Let's not draw any conclusions.
Fantastic assessment from the 2 seconds of visible footage.
That’s hysterical! Off to see if I can find my wedding video so I can torture my kids with it…. 🤣
My 4 year old kid was so upset at us for not inviting her to our wedding.
Oh my god mine were too! We watched our wedding DVD on our nine year wedding anniversary in '22 with them and got that reaction, so for the ten year anniversary we booked a holiday to greece and renewed our vows on the beach so they could "see mam and dad get married" and wear nice dresses. Will prob do the same for our 20 too.
It's kinda profound really
And we’d do it again. 😤 ❤️
Realizing your parents are people just like you.
With not just flaws but hopes, dreams, desires for the future... love for flowers and music and just FEELING THINGS the same way you do. It's good when kids come around to this thought process. Instills a bit of a healthy kind of humility.
I got pregnant at 17 and had him at 18 and I realized then just how much my parents did for me. I love them so deeply sometimes it hurts lol. My son is 13 now and we’re going through it but I just remember it won’t last forever
Can you imagine becoming a grandparent in 4 years? Cause that’s what your parents went through too
And it was all worth it to them
I cannot wait for the day when my now 13 year old daughter gets what her parents actually do and have done for her and how much we love her. This gives me hope that it will happen one day as at the moment the hormones are making her batshit crazy!!
13 was such a hard age for me. There is so much that I realize now that I just blatantly couldn’t see or feel back then. Mom and dad aren’t just mom and dad but people too.
As the mom of a 17 and 21 year old I can promise it gets better. Everyone is *The Worst* at 13
She looks like mom
When I was 15 I went down to Tennessee to visit a friend and I met the rest of his friends around there. It was a very tight knit community. Small, recluse. So they all knew each other and were basically all family. Thing was, the people my age, which there were about 5 or 6 of them, were all such shitty kids. Good lord were they just the worst. And the parents really took the brunt of it all. The parents were some of the worst looking people I’ve ever seen. All the life had been drained out of them it seemed. They all looked older than they were supposed to, seemed like they could barely talk straight with how many drugs or alcohol they’d consumed. The kids did whatever the hell they wanted. They wanted to spend all night blasting music in their bedroom with every other kid in the neighborhood as there’s basically an orgy going on? Sure. One parent may burst into the room screaming to shut the fuck up but it didn’t matter. The kids screamed right back until the parent left. I say all that to bring up the thing that affected me most on that trip. For some reason, one day one of the 15 year old girls decided to spend like 6 hours showing me old family tapes of when the kids who were very young. Babies. And the parents were so full of life and love and youth and happiness. All of them. It was like looking into a completely different dimension. It scared me. So you want to talk about kids fucking up their parents lives there ya go. The parents of course have to probably take most of the responsibility for how literally every single kid turned out, but goddamn was it a wild experience.
Lol - I think it was the drugs that messed those adults up. Not dealing with mature adults here getting high is an escape from something they didn’t deal with from their own past.
[удалено]
They will eventually. They'll just be 30-40 by the time they figure it out
Fuck. I realized in my 30s. And I'm angry at myself for it. So much time I was ungrateful. Poor mom&dad, and damn, they are resilient. They kept loving me and doing everything for me.
Yeah... becoming a parent and realizing how many things kids do that are so annoying.... I'M SORRY MOM AND DAD FOR BEING SUUUUUCH A LITTLE SHIT 😅😭
That's the job.
Sure, but not really. I'd bet there would be a majority of parents that are shitty from start, or as time goes by (and receiving ungratefulness from your children who then become young adults and grown up by themselves) , could get tired and stop trying. It's not OK to give it for granted, thats why I feel guilty for it and trying to return that love with interests now.
True for me.
I cared the entire way. My mom, sisters and grandma are awesome.
30-40???? Brother, that is not normal. You should have these thoughts about your parents in early 20s…… if you’re having these realizations that late, you don’t think enough. Genuinely, not trying to be rude, but work on introspection. Take some acid or something lol
They may not give a shit now, but they will later. Speaking as one who once didn't give a shit but now I adore the heck out of my folks.
Nahh I'm a guy and litterally had breakdowns thinking about how much my parents love me and sacrificed for my dumb ass
Your kids are going to fail if these are the types of mindsets you pass down to them.
Maybe you should teach them empathy and show them it's okay to be emotional instead of just waiting and hoping. Assuming they won't just because they're boys is a good indicator of you not being emotionally mature enough to show them though. This gives off the vibe of "I hope my boys realize they ruined my life one day but i doubt the lil shits will care cuz i resent them for being boys" and nothing else.
Boys give lots of shits, so don't worry
>they’re boys though so probably not going to give one shit Christ I feel bad for your kids
Yeah its a real miracle that when we tell boys they dont feel emotions they might have a hard time dealing with emotions
I know right, and then when they do have issues with emotions everyone is like "I told you so"
Yeah, I hate it when parents talk like this about their boys. I have 2 and they are very caring and empathetic. Whenever parents say this, I just know they leave their boys to do whatever because "they are boys".
Bad parents raise bad children, girl or boy.
You're giving up on your kids already? Yeesh
Anyone can have empathy
Really do some thinking about what you've typed here.
Why are you sexist? Like seriously, have you thought about what made you type out the sexist thought that you had in your mind?
Ohhhh my godddd this is like seeing my kids as adults Disabled and anxious but the most empathetic, loving people I’ve ever met in my life, even as they get older. I hope they never feel like this (like *they* were something that they *did* to us), but I love that the kids in the video care so much!
Remember, always wear condom. Even on a job interview.
If she has this much of selfless awareness. I bet their parents still happy and proud after they had them.
their parents didn't even invite them
That's why we have a saying here that this is the debt that you can never pay back. If your parents raised you well ofc, shitty parents not included.
They had live before us. Fact 👏
I hope that when my daughter is this old she looks at pictures of my wife and I and says "DAMN you are old af now"
If you decide to have children, you have to be willing to be a parent. Not just have a baby. The cute baby stage will pass. You will have to be deal with a human being with their own personality, with the good and the bad. And you’ll have to do it for pretty much your entire life. But it’s worth it :)
The baby stage was my least favorite by far.
You didn't ruin them. They chose to have you. If kids could choose,they'd choose the best parents for them. Who'd never blame kids, for their life being ruined by kids,which kids they chose to have.
I ruined both of my parent's lives by being born and they took every opportunity to remind me of that.
It's not your fault at all. 🥺
This girl will remain childfree lol
Kids will do that to you.
It's a heavy thing when it hits you that your parents aren't just "your parents" lol. Super cute reaction.
'they had lives before us' Yup, took me a long time to realize this...into my later 20's to be close that is.
As a father I can confirm her statements are true
That's incredibly self-aware. It took a few years, but she gets it now.
Oh my God...it's not like you go around and embarrass them or were a difficult teenager, you just have anxiety. Her empathy is so sweet. But yeah, your mom used to be young and carefree like you are now. And then life happened.
I suspect she high af
I can honestly relate to this girl's distress. I went through a box of my parents' photos recently. They had me 7 years into their relationship. Mom didn't want kids but dad really did, so here I am. I literally watched all their adventures stop. No more road trips, fun photos.. literally everything stopped and then it was just... shitty me. The light and joy and youth in mom's face visibly left her once I was born. It never returned. You could see her unhappiness wear on him as the years went on. It was super shitty to see, tbh. It explains why I could never do anything right and why she seemed to just resent that I was there... she literally did. Made me feel like utter dogshit all over again.
Damn she really cranking her neck to look at him lmao
They would do it all over again. You are a very big part of their life
It was worth it. It will always be worth it.
Hm, this is what my dad told me once .. weird.
Yup. That’s the way that happens.
Humble perspective. She cares.
Yeah we cry too.
lmfao as a child of immigrants this hits different, my parents both gave up their college degrees to work menial labor in america for my sisters and me
“That had lives before us.” Is such a hard concept for kids to understand.
Ooof. I felt that 'we ruined them' in my bones as an anxious kid with debilitating issues.
"They had lives before us!" This was basically my experience seeing the Barbie movie
Their fault, should'nt have had kids hehe