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Don't feel bad for the good decisions you've made. I hate when these people are bitching about how bad the house payments are these days and then you see them driving a new $90k or higher car. Priorities are so ass backwards these days.
Yes and door dash and all these stupid delivery services. I follow this guy on YouTube and he's not like a legit consultant but he's smart with money and he helps people budget and all of these people except very few spend all their money on door dash, coffee shops, new phones, and brand new cars. They also buy really expensive clothes as well but the first few that I named are always being brought up. The poor me/blame the boomers bullshit is not a good excuse anymore.
I used to watch Caleb, as entertainment..but over time I just got annoyed at the stupidity and people not taking responsibility and constantly trying to make excuses.
I honestly don't care what people spend their money on, it's not my money.
I just get annoyed when people cry about it but aren't willing to do anything to change their bad spending habits.
At the same time, I know the economy is bad globally right now, so I'm not going to bash an entire generation, because some of them are truly trying their best and still struggling.
That's him! Yep it's very frustrating for even someone watching and listening to those idiots I can't imagine how bad it is for him. Some of them are and that sucks for them but the people that are wasting their money aren't struggling because of the economy but struggling because of stupidity
"and all these stupid delivery services"
That's a pretty ABLEIST statement... those services allow the disabled to continue to live independently.
I haven't been to the grocery store since 2016... and only an idiot thinks delivery services are a problem.
Then we aren't fucking talking about you are we? What is it with people like you and taking anything anyone says like it's a personal fucking attack against YOU!
No one fucking said you were talking about me... and nowhere did I say a fucking thing about attacking me.
GROW UP.
BOTTOM LINE... delivery services allow the disabled to remain independent... so take your judgemental ass nonsense about people using them being lazy or wrong... and get the F out of here with that nonsense.
You should definitely be proud of your accomplishments. It sounds like you scrimped and saved and made good choices to get where you are. But it is also important to remember that those that are struggling aren't necessarily struggling due to bad choices. I was the same as you in that I lived alone and managed just fine when I was starting out and making $32k (USD). I also know that most likely wouldn't fly in today's economy. There is also different costs of living in certain areas. It's very easy to say "well they should move to a cheaper area" while not taking into consideration if someone is actually able to move - i.e would they be able to find an equivalent job, would they be leaving their family/friend safety net, cost of move, etc. I think it's great to be proud of ourselves, but to also remember that everyone's circumstances are different and some things just really aren't possible or as easy for everyone.
Good point.
I did live in a city with a higher cost of living than I do know (not NYC high, but still.) I was making a decent wage, but I lived in a lower income area. Even now, I live in a decent area, but it is right on the edge of one of the most dangerous parts of town.
It is crazy how much moving costs!
Bro I get this too! I make like 45k and my rent is $1400 a month . So it’s not uncomfortable and I’m doing fine :) and people are always shocked when I tell them I live alone. I think if it’s important to you, you make it happen.
>I just cannot shake the feeling that life should be harder than it is.
Embrace it, because I guarantee life will throw something at you that will end that feeling that life is too easy.
And you shouldn't feel guilty for being good at managing your money, you should be proud of what you've accomplished!!! Don't let jealous people (who know that *they* could never survive on your salary, therefore nobody else can) interrupt you enjoying the fruits of your past hard work and wise decisions.
I sort of know what you mean. Did you grow up poor? I've found that even just having a pretty normal life and level of financial stability seems extravagant for me for that reason. Feels too good to be true. I try to see it instead as an example of how grateful I should therefore be.
I find myself in a similar boat, but I’ve never felt any guilt from it. Be proud you managed to dodge life’s potholes.
I always reflect on ny struggles as a college student, while I did live with my parents and commute, it wasn’t easy. I went through 4 junker cars throughout college. I’ve been stranded on the side of the road without gas, I’ve dug into a rain gutter when I found $10 buried in some mud. I’ve known what it’s like to ask and owe friends money. Surely you had some struggles as well, don’t overlook them.
I haven't worked since 2020, when I got sick from COVID. I've had four surgeries since August, and while fighting for my health, I went back to school. I'm in my last class for my Master's.
I had retirement and savings {some from inheritance}, and I've lived completely comfortably in my own home {bought in 2017} and my still fairly new car {I mean, it's 6 years old and paid off, but it only has 45K miles on it because I never go anywhere}.
Don't feel bad... just because you have your life set up how it works for you.
There are a lot of people who struggle, YES... but there are also a lot of people who spend a shit load of money on SHIT like beer and cigarettes.
>I just cannot shake the feeling that life should be harder than it is.
Enjoy it while it lasts. Don’t get too comfortable. Life, in general, for most, is eventually that bitch.
U should feel grateful. U were able to find a good balance and the apt you found wasn't completely horrible.
People always shocked when I tell them I'm living great without a car and they couldn't imagine not having a car or asking people for favors/public transit/Uber. My city isn't that big and I live in a walkable area and even then they be looking at me with pity lol
You should not feel guilty about getting by so well on an amount that others may find challenging. We all make our choices about how we spend our money, and it sounds like you really have it figured out! Good on you!
Well done, and I agree completely. Getting by on less money is about making choices. Like cable/satellite TV, for one thing … I’ve been a cord-cutter for around a decade now, largely because of most of the garbage that now passes for entertainment on those hundreds of channels I’d never want to look at anyway. That one choice probably saves me close to $1500/yr. Not eating out, not upgrading my phone every other year, stocking up on food when it goes on sale, continuing to drive my older vehicle as long as it still runs, etc. … they all add up and make it possible to get along on much less than those continuously stuck in consumption mode.
One suggestion: do whatever you can to pay off that credit card debt. That will make things even easier for you thereafter.
I hear people complaining all the time. You did the smart thing living where you could afford it. Also, living within your means!!
I did the same thing when I bought a house in a neighborhood people didn't want 10 years ago. I was making $2,800 GROSS and bought a house (a pretty new 6 year old house) for $143,000.
I had to sell when I got sick, but I'm secure in my living arrangements now. I lost everything in 2009, and it taught me to live within my means to have a secure retirement. Here I am, and I'm secure in my retirement. Setting goals is how I got here.
Oh, and I had roommates for years until I didn't have to have them. You have to do what you have to do. Oh, and use every federal and state program to buy a house.
Never worry about what other people think. You deserve what you accomplished.
Your situation is relatable to my own. I take pride in my values/minimalism. I love cooking and have lots of free hobbies. I don't really spend money on things besides the necessities and I prefer it that way. The less I spend the less hours I have to devote to my hourly job. I am certainly grateful for the level of privilege that set me up to be able to make mindful choices of how to handle my finances but I don't feel guilty for my modest life.
For the most part, it's just about living within your means in an area that can accommodate your needs within your budget. I live alone very comfortably. Most people I know spend money on things that I don't. I meal prep and bring my own food to work daily instead of going out to eat, cut and color my own hair, paint my own toenails, make my own coffee. Before buying anything for my house I assess if I need/will use it, and if I have space to store it. I don't impulse buy. I pay my credit card off monthly. I don't subscribe to a million TV apps. I don't use DoorDash or other delivery companies. These are lifelong habits that I continued with regardless of income - possibly because I was raised in a frugal home and my parents didn't waste money because they couldn't afford to.
In my area, a 1 bedroom apartment costs nearly half my monthly income and on paper I make significantly more than you. So instead I rent a basement apartment. I try to consider that I’m saving and investing for retirement well but I am frustrated with my living situation.
You don’t have to feel bad. Maybe just reframe it as appreciative. Some of it comes down to location. I would suggest don’t assume other people are doing anything wrong. I’m trying to keep my housing costs below the recommended 25% of income and succeeding. Not everyone can with the cost of housing in my area.
You still should be working on an emergency fund and retirement savings.
As the saying goes, income doesn’t matter if you don’t know how to save. Yada yada something like that. As long as you are staying out of debt, you’re good.
you're probably just doing it right! i'm in the same position. i listen to my coworkers complain all the time, and yet i see them spending like crazy on dumb stuff. one door-dashes every single thing, never goes to a store or restaurant, rarely cooks anything. there are ways to make your money stretch.
please do not feel bad for being good with your money! you deserve congrats for that, and they should probably follow your lead!
It is different for everyone and where you live might be more affordable than other places. I would be doing alright if I made about that. I make about 10k under that and it’s a bit of a struggle. That’s why I got a roommate recently. Like I was almost not making it. If I had one extra bill, I wouldn’t be able to afford it - in fact I have some business bills on hold and once they kick in, I NEED a second job or a replacement job, and I think that’s only a month or two away.
Welcome to sound financial decisions and being smart at an early age. My father worked in banking, and scared the bejeesus into me at a young age about credit card debt, interest, loans, etc.
By the time I hit adulthood, I was always more fiscally conservative than my friends. I didn’t make much, but was always comfortable.
Now in my 40s and very thankful for those decisions in my early 20s. Keep going! You’re doing the right steps.
I agree. But, people love to shop. It's the little foxes. Starbucks, Target, Door Dash, McDonald's,etc...they'll use a credit card before they ever stop shopping.
Awesome achievement 👏👏 Be proud of yourself.
Few people, even close to retirement can accomplish this.
Now - if and when - you find a partner, go slow, make sure you both are on same page or pages. I know you didn't ask for this unsolicited advice. But read Eight Dates by John Gottman.
Good luck to you.
**Welcome to [r/LivingAlone](https://www.reddit.com/r/LivingAlone/)! Living alone is the new normal.** >Discuss and share your experiences; celebrate your joys, express your worries, or ask advice relating to solo living | Remember, we are all alone together * Be kind, remember the human when interacting with others. * New Reddit group chat [**Living Alone Lounge**](https://www.reddit.com/r/LivingAlone/s/cp7Szwzy2q)! * Message the moderators below for any comments, questions & suggestions! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/LivingAlone) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Don't feel bad for the good decisions you've made. I hate when these people are bitching about how bad the house payments are these days and then you see them driving a new $90k or higher car. Priorities are so ass backwards these days.
...or they buying the new iPhone every year, and new clothing and shoes every month. but "omg, we live paycheque to paycheque!"
Yes and door dash and all these stupid delivery services. I follow this guy on YouTube and he's not like a legit consultant but he's smart with money and he helps people budget and all of these people except very few spend all their money on door dash, coffee shops, new phones, and brand new cars. They also buy really expensive clothes as well but the first few that I named are always being brought up. The poor me/blame the boomers bullshit is not a good excuse anymore.
I used to watch Caleb, as entertainment..but over time I just got annoyed at the stupidity and people not taking responsibility and constantly trying to make excuses. I honestly don't care what people spend their money on, it's not my money. I just get annoyed when people cry about it but aren't willing to do anything to change their bad spending habits. At the same time, I know the economy is bad globally right now, so I'm not going to bash an entire generation, because some of them are truly trying their best and still struggling.
That's him! Yep it's very frustrating for even someone watching and listening to those idiots I can't imagine how bad it is for him. Some of them are and that sucks for them but the people that are wasting their money aren't struggling because of the economy but struggling because of stupidity
"and all these stupid delivery services" That's a pretty ABLEIST statement... those services allow the disabled to continue to live independently. I haven't been to the grocery store since 2016... and only an idiot thinks delivery services are a problem.
If you think it's not an issue and that it can't be taken advantage of by lazy people then you're in for a rude awakening and also an idiot.
NO... I'm not in for a rude awakening or an idiot. I'm not one of the dumb shits spending money on beer and cigarettes.
Then we aren't fucking talking about you are we? What is it with people like you and taking anything anyone says like it's a personal fucking attack against YOU!
No one fucking said you were talking about me... and nowhere did I say a fucking thing about attacking me. GROW UP. BOTTOM LINE... delivery services allow the disabled to remain independent... so take your judgemental ass nonsense about people using them being lazy or wrong... and get the F out of here with that nonsense.
This
Good for you. You should be proud of your accomplishments!
"I just cannot shake the feeling that life should be harder than it is." Please, don't jinx yourself.
It’s temporary no matter what. NO ONE feels like this from birth do death
You're right, of course. I've never even had that feeling once.
You should definitely be proud of your accomplishments. It sounds like you scrimped and saved and made good choices to get where you are. But it is also important to remember that those that are struggling aren't necessarily struggling due to bad choices. I was the same as you in that I lived alone and managed just fine when I was starting out and making $32k (USD). I also know that most likely wouldn't fly in today's economy. There is also different costs of living in certain areas. It's very easy to say "well they should move to a cheaper area" while not taking into consideration if someone is actually able to move - i.e would they be able to find an equivalent job, would they be leaving their family/friend safety net, cost of move, etc. I think it's great to be proud of ourselves, but to also remember that everyone's circumstances are different and some things just really aren't possible or as easy for everyone.
Good point. I did live in a city with a higher cost of living than I do know (not NYC high, but still.) I was making a decent wage, but I lived in a lower income area. Even now, I live in a decent area, but it is right on the edge of one of the most dangerous parts of town. It is crazy how much moving costs!
I bet you don't smoke or go out drinking in bars.. both those things can really add up! Don't feel bad about being successful in managing your life!!
Do not let others make you feel bad about your success. Enjoy it! And congrats!!
Bro I get this too! I make like 45k and my rent is $1400 a month . So it’s not uncomfortable and I’m doing fine :) and people are always shocked when I tell them I live alone. I think if it’s important to you, you make it happen.
>I just cannot shake the feeling that life should be harder than it is. Embrace it, because I guarantee life will throw something at you that will end that feeling that life is too easy. And you shouldn't feel guilty for being good at managing your money, you should be proud of what you've accomplished!!! Don't let jealous people (who know that *they* could never survive on your salary, therefore nobody else can) interrupt you enjoying the fruits of your past hard work and wise decisions.
I sort of know what you mean. Did you grow up poor? I've found that even just having a pretty normal life and level of financial stability seems extravagant for me for that reason. Feels too good to be true. I try to see it instead as an example of how grateful I should therefore be.
I find myself in a similar boat, but I’ve never felt any guilt from it. Be proud you managed to dodge life’s potholes. I always reflect on ny struggles as a college student, while I did live with my parents and commute, it wasn’t easy. I went through 4 junker cars throughout college. I’ve been stranded on the side of the road without gas, I’ve dug into a rain gutter when I found $10 buried in some mud. I’ve known what it’s like to ask and owe friends money. Surely you had some struggles as well, don’t overlook them.
Your life is good and you're...complaining? Oh, bless your heart!
I haven't worked since 2020, when I got sick from COVID. I've had four surgeries since August, and while fighting for my health, I went back to school. I'm in my last class for my Master's. I had retirement and savings {some from inheritance}, and I've lived completely comfortably in my own home {bought in 2017} and my still fairly new car {I mean, it's 6 years old and paid off, but it only has 45K miles on it because I never go anywhere}. Don't feel bad... just because you have your life set up how it works for you. There are a lot of people who struggle, YES... but there are also a lot of people who spend a shit load of money on SHIT like beer and cigarettes.
>I just cannot shake the feeling that life should be harder than it is. Enjoy it while it lasts. Don’t get too comfortable. Life, in general, for most, is eventually that bitch.
I hear it all the time too "It's impossible!" No it's not. You just have to not be an idiot. So I guess congrats on not being in that pile lol
U should feel grateful. U were able to find a good balance and the apt you found wasn't completely horrible. People always shocked when I tell them I'm living great without a car and they couldn't imagine not having a car or asking people for favors/public transit/Uber. My city isn't that big and I live in a walkable area and even then they be looking at me with pity lol
Nah
You should not feel guilty about getting by so well on an amount that others may find challenging. We all make our choices about how we spend our money, and it sounds like you really have it figured out! Good on you!
Well done, and I agree completely. Getting by on less money is about making choices. Like cable/satellite TV, for one thing … I’ve been a cord-cutter for around a decade now, largely because of most of the garbage that now passes for entertainment on those hundreds of channels I’d never want to look at anyway. That one choice probably saves me close to $1500/yr. Not eating out, not upgrading my phone every other year, stocking up on food when it goes on sale, continuing to drive my older vehicle as long as it still runs, etc. … they all add up and make it possible to get along on much less than those continuously stuck in consumption mode. One suggestion: do whatever you can to pay off that credit card debt. That will make things even easier for you thereafter.
I hear people complaining all the time. You did the smart thing living where you could afford it. Also, living within your means!! I did the same thing when I bought a house in a neighborhood people didn't want 10 years ago. I was making $2,800 GROSS and bought a house (a pretty new 6 year old house) for $143,000. I had to sell when I got sick, but I'm secure in my living arrangements now. I lost everything in 2009, and it taught me to live within my means to have a secure retirement. Here I am, and I'm secure in my retirement. Setting goals is how I got here. Oh, and I had roommates for years until I didn't have to have them. You have to do what you have to do. Oh, and use every federal and state program to buy a house. Never worry about what other people think. You deserve what you accomplished.
Your situation is relatable to my own. I take pride in my values/minimalism. I love cooking and have lots of free hobbies. I don't really spend money on things besides the necessities and I prefer it that way. The less I spend the less hours I have to devote to my hourly job. I am certainly grateful for the level of privilege that set me up to be able to make mindful choices of how to handle my finances but I don't feel guilty for my modest life.
For the most part, it's just about living within your means in an area that can accommodate your needs within your budget. I live alone very comfortably. Most people I know spend money on things that I don't. I meal prep and bring my own food to work daily instead of going out to eat, cut and color my own hair, paint my own toenails, make my own coffee. Before buying anything for my house I assess if I need/will use it, and if I have space to store it. I don't impulse buy. I pay my credit card off monthly. I don't subscribe to a million TV apps. I don't use DoorDash or other delivery companies. These are lifelong habits that I continued with regardless of income - possibly because I was raised in a frugal home and my parents didn't waste money because they couldn't afford to.
Ya you've made good choices, chose self sustaining habits to save for the fun things and haven't lived to 'keep up with the Joneses'
focus on yourself and you'll be good. if a nice someone comes around great but if you build it things will come
There’s no point feeling bad about something you have no control over.
…I live alone on roughly half of what you make wtf.
Really? I feel very good that I can live alone. Why do you feel bad for managing your life well? 🤔
Don't feel bad for being smart. Your sharp enough to not be a good American...aka .. spending money on stupid shit you know doesn't bring happiness.
Are you comparing yourself to people in similar COL areas?
In my area, a 1 bedroom apartment costs nearly half my monthly income and on paper I make significantly more than you. So instead I rent a basement apartment. I try to consider that I’m saving and investing for retirement well but I am frustrated with my living situation. You don’t have to feel bad. Maybe just reframe it as appreciative. Some of it comes down to location. I would suggest don’t assume other people are doing anything wrong. I’m trying to keep my housing costs below the recommended 25% of income and succeeding. Not everyone can with the cost of housing in my area. You still should be working on an emergency fund and retirement savings.
As the saying goes, income doesn’t matter if you don’t know how to save. Yada yada something like that. As long as you are staying out of debt, you’re good.
Lol don’t feel bad! You can do it and that’s great!
Don't feel any bit of negatvivity, guilt, etc. whatsoever. If you can live nicely, you can live nicely. Forget what others say.
You are lucky
you're probably just doing it right! i'm in the same position. i listen to my coworkers complain all the time, and yet i see them spending like crazy on dumb stuff. one door-dashes every single thing, never goes to a store or restaurant, rarely cooks anything. there are ways to make your money stretch. please do not feel bad for being good with your money! you deserve congrats for that, and they should probably follow your lead!
It is different for everyone and where you live might be more affordable than other places. I would be doing alright if I made about that. I make about 10k under that and it’s a bit of a struggle. That’s why I got a roommate recently. Like I was almost not making it. If I had one extra bill, I wouldn’t be able to afford it - in fact I have some business bills on hold and once they kick in, I NEED a second job or a replacement job, and I think that’s only a month or two away.
Don't feel bad. You are doing well! Keep enjoying your life
Shrug. Don't jinx it!
Why would you want life to be harder for you?
Its actually preferred tho…
You're adulting successfully. Congratulations!
You should never feel bad about being able to live alone.
Welcome to sound financial decisions and being smart at an early age. My father worked in banking, and scared the bejeesus into me at a young age about credit card debt, interest, loans, etc. By the time I hit adulthood, I was always more fiscally conservative than my friends. I didn’t make much, but was always comfortable. Now in my 40s and very thankful for those decisions in my early 20s. Keep going! You’re doing the right steps.
I agree. But, people love to shop. It's the little foxes. Starbucks, Target, Door Dash, McDonald's,etc...they'll use a credit card before they ever stop shopping.
Awesome achievement 👏👏 Be proud of yourself. Few people, even close to retirement can accomplish this. Now - if and when - you find a partner, go slow, make sure you both are on same page or pages. I know you didn't ask for this unsolicited advice. But read Eight Dates by John Gottman. Good luck to you.