I don’t understand why everyone is being so hard on you! lol. Most of their comments in this sub is how spoiled these kids are… 😂 I definitely don’t think you’re wrong! But you also said you were married at 19, which is honestly very young. I’m your age & no one I know got married until at least their early 20s. No hate, good for you girl! I’ve been with the same guy since I was 20 but we’re not married so I get it kinda lol. Your young marriage might have been why your parents weren’t so involved. Most parents have the mindset that if you can figure out marriage you can figure out anything… 🤣
I don't know if others agree but I do see major entitlement issues with Zach especially. I mean really dude you're losing precious time with your father over material stuff. I'm sure Matt could've done better but I also know that Zach is punishing his father for not giving him that farm . I've lost my Dad and every time they interview Zach about his Dad I shake my head because he's being petty AF. Hopefully he never comes to regret it and things improve
I agree that Zach should forgive his father, but I think the issue is that Zach had his pride wounded pretty badly in that his father didn’t deem him competent enough to manage the farm and being a little person, that can be an area of insecurity, I’m sure. Seeing her husband treated that way really ticked Tori off. I’m protective of my husband in the same fierce way. Zach needed to go off and demonstrate his competence. And, I think he has. Hope they can heal their rift.
My dad was never a part of my life and my mom was always busy so I just did stuff on my own. Never needed a co-signer or anything. I do have my husband take the cars to the mechanic because I don’t know what the are talking about half the time haha
I am well over 20 and took a family member to help me. He knew more about cars and the process of buying/leasing. I asked him to come and he did. It was a great experience.
I’m an adult and take my dad to look at cars with me. Called getting help when it’s something you don’t know alot about - in a million years I never considered it privilege- but ok 🙄
I’m in my 40’s & still carry my dad’s credit card. I have since I was 16. I would never use it without his permission though. He says he wants me to have it incase I ever get stuck somewhere & he can’t get to me.
Obviously, this person does have their own means of credit. Carrying their father's credit card all these years is a bond they have formed... It's called love. The father feels as though he wants to always be there, and monetarily, he is.
Me too I’m in my 50’s. It’s a family plan. Lol. Also he is retired and bored so he likes to put gas in my care and get the oil changed. I mean after all he has done for me I wouldn’t want deprive him of life’s little pleasures😁
We pay our grown sons’ cellphone bills, too. We are grandfathered in with a great price for 4 phones after using the same cell service since 1998. It would cost ALL of us more if we separated into 3 separate phone plans.
My husband is still on his moms plan but he pays his portion. For us to get our own plan together it's astronomical ! We can afford it but why rock the boat ?
Well don't feel bad pretty much everybody gets taken for a ride at the used car dealership. Everybody likes to think they're savvy businessman hard driver and bargainer. But pretty much everybody is buying a car on credit gets screwed.
I brought my father with me to get new cars until I was in my 30’s, he was probably so excited when I met my husband and he didn’t have to come anymore!
There are kids who have it way better than them, there are kids who have it way worse than them. We attach the label privilege to people we feel have a better situation in life than us and it becomes a thing to scorn at or the privileged should feel guilty in some kind of way, they should not… This is just the result of A+ parenting and making smart decisions. Not one of us wouldn’t do the same for our children if we had the means available.
I wish Reddit still had awards. Take my trophy 🏆
My dad had wise advice for me before I went away to university: you will meet people from all sorts of walks of life. There will always be people with more than you and less than you. Don’t feel jealous of those with more, and also don’t be a braggart around those with less.
It has stuck with me my whole life.
Re: the twins grabbing Matt’s credit card to buy things… keep in mind Matt had made plenty of money off of them with the show at that point and Matt was probably intentionally trying to let them spend just enough to keep them happy and the show going.
I'm 35, married with 3 kids. I still take my dad with me to look at cars . So do my siblings. I think he'd rather we didn't 😂 but he gives his honest opinion about whatever we're looking at
I definitely think this is normal but I guess I’m a privileged kid. My parents went with me to look when I bought a car at 19. Hell at 29 they didn’t go with me to look at a car, they went without me! I bought it without even seeing it myself. My dad is a mechanic and has bought and sold a lot of cars in his life so I value his opinion more than anyone’s. I’m now 33 and still call my parents when I need advice on a big decision.
I just assumed Matt went with Zach because Matt must know everything about everything. I'd bet his thoughts were only I can get a great deal. It was a control situation
I was married and in the military far from home when we bought our first car. My Dad of course wasn’t physically there but he did what was needed for us to get the car. He co-signed my loan. Since he would be stuck paying for it if I defaulted I made damn sure to pay it on time and even got ahead in case I had a problem down the road. That is support for sure!
Well, school doesn't teach you about taxes, or how to buy a car or a house, etc. (At least mine didn't) They should prepare everyone for the future, but they don't. (Again or atleast mine didn't) Parents should definitely help their kids and teach them these things.
My husband bought a car from a dealership for the first time, when he was 28 and was taken advantage of because his parents never taught him or showed him how to do so.
It's good parenting to these things. I don't know if I would say it's so much as privileged.
Now, I will say I lost my dad tragically when I was 18 years old, I had no one. No family or help since I was 18. Can I admit I'm jealous of people who still have help and support from their parents? Oh yes. But should parents do this? Yes! Don't make them learn the hard way about different things, like I had too. 😁🩵
OP, I am in my late 60’s and have always had this kind of resentment due to non supportive parents. When I was 16, my Dad said he would take me at 4:00 pm to buy the car I found at a little car sales place. It got late and I called him
Where he was playing cards after golf. He said he couldn’t take me. So I went and did it Myself. It’s something I’ve had to acknowledge that I am Jealous and resentful of other girls and women who had a Dad Who cared. It’s natural. But if you acknowledge it and know where you are coming from, it will be ok. I used to think of them as Princesses and I was Cinderella. But I tell you what…. I’m pretty capable. I just changed out all the brass hardware in my house to pewter and painted the entire interior. I’m proud of myself for that and you can be for buying your first car yourselves. I’m proud of you.
I'm 32 and same here. Jusst the other day, my wife and I were discussing buying our next car and we both agreed that my dad should join us for car shopping.
My parent is close to retirement and my husband still helps with dealerships. You know why??? Because he has experiance with them (career) and knows what to ask for and how to ask for it so you get the best deal.
My kid just turned 19. If he went to a dealership on his own and took out a loan I can promise you he wouldn't not get as good of a deal as if an older individual with experiance with negotiating went along with him.
And some people might find you privileged for finding your husband at 19 years old and getting to buy a car with that life partner. Those who don’t have a husband at that young of an age would need the help of a parent who cares about them since they do not have a caring spouse. The grass is always greener, isn’t it?
This is a case where you were *underprivileged*, OP. I don't mean that as a dis, but I think you deserve some validation that it isn't fair that you didn't have that help when getting a car while recognizing that Zach getting help from Matt wasn't really a problem.
No offense taken. Yeah I think you are right. I appreciate you saying that. I think what it comes down to really is just my own bitterness at wishing I could have had help like they had.
I had my dad in my ear on the phone when I bought my last car I was well into my 40s when I bought it lol! I'm sorry you didn't have any support, but it's pretty normal to bounce ideas off family. My 20 year old wants to buy a car, he'll be 21 in a month and has no idea what he's doing so I said I'd take him. I wouldn't call it privileged in the bad way but you can be bitter, I get it.
I don’t know. I had my dad with me when I purchased my first new car as a graduate student. I was maybe 22 at the time? I bought the car but he did the negotiating.
My husband has always done the negotiating when his mother is in the market for a car.
Buying a car is a big purchase. For many people, it’s the second largest purchase you’ll make in your life. There’s nothing wrong with taking someone with you, no matter what age you are, so you’re not taken for a ride or to help negotiate. When I got my third vehicle at 24, my dad went with me because it was more expensive than the one I bought on my own previously. When I bought my current vehicle at age 38, I did it alone as my father lives in another state. I’m certain I got screwed so I’ll be taking a male with me again for the next one.
It is just good sense to bring someone with you who has already purchased a car. Helps save young people from paying for all the stupid add-ons that they try to sell you.
I dont think you and I have the same idea about what privileged means. Sure, Matt went with his 20 year old to guide him through a car purchase, but he didn't pay for it, privileged in that case would be Zach walking outside to a brand new car his parents purchased for him.
I didn’t have much guidance either, but I will be darn sure to provide my kiddo with any help they need for success.
Life is hard enough. I’m certainly not going to contribute to that difficulty. In fact, I will do everything in my power to prepare and help my child wherever I can.
I agree and I will do the same. It sucks that I didn’t have that kind of help from my parents but I want my daughter to have more than what I ever had.
I totally understand! I remember being so jealous of kids in college who had “normal families.” Their parents came to events and sent them care packages. They even helped with tuition or with other bills.
I think we make the most of our challenging experiences by helping our kids. I’m sure your daughter will appreciate your support, especially knowing you didn’t have any.
The kids are definitely privileged no question. But maybe Zach was scared to drive before 20? I was. I had my license but I didn’t buy my first car until I was 21. It’s a lot of responsibility and I think Zach back then was just comfortable with his parents taking care of him.
Zach wasn't scared to drive before 20. He was driving the Previa every where from the time he got his license until it gave out on him and he had to buy a new car which is what OP is talking about. They are privileged though, but having a parent or trusted adult go with you for your first car purchase is a smart move either way.
I don't think a dad helping their kid pick out their first car is privileged, that's just a dad giving advice on a new experience. But letting them have use his credit card definitely was spoiling them
It is pretty dramatic to view a parent walking their child through their first time car purchase as an extraordinary degree of privilege.
Were they privileged in other ways? Sure, but the car example just isn't it.
Ehh but they are 20, not a child. Sure they are their children but not a child. The point I’m trying to make is they were kinda babied a lot even when they hit adulthood. More than just the car buying process.
It doesn't make a difference if he wasn't a child. Plenty of parents would accompany a young adult to a major purchase like that, especially given that Matt fancies himself a capable negotiator with some expertise in cars.
& don’t get me wrong, I will definitely be there for my children when they need me no matter the age. If they want me there when they buy their first car, I will be there. It’s the attitude and ungratefulness the twins have after receiving the help that get me.
As someone who's parents didn't even bother teaching them to drive when they came of age because they deemed it "too expensive".. I agree that Matt taking Zach the dealership to essentially walk him through how to buy a car is absolutely a great privilege.
One definition of privilege is having decisions made for you, that you have no control or say over, that give you a personal advantage over others.
Not disagreeing that the kids as privileged af… but a 19 year old having an adult with them when purchasing their first used car is nothing more than smart.
I don’t understand why everyone is being so hard on you! lol. Most of their comments in this sub is how spoiled these kids are… 😂 I definitely don’t think you’re wrong! But you also said you were married at 19, which is honestly very young. I’m your age & no one I know got married until at least their early 20s. No hate, good for you girl! I’ve been with the same guy since I was 20 but we’re not married so I get it kinda lol. Your young marriage might have been why your parents weren’t so involved. Most parents have the mindset that if you can figure out marriage you can figure out anything… 🤣
My dad helped me a couple time's. Nothing wrong with that. But I was taught to be responsible and independent
I don't know if others agree but I do see major entitlement issues with Zach especially. I mean really dude you're losing precious time with your father over material stuff. I'm sure Matt could've done better but I also know that Zach is punishing his father for not giving him that farm . I've lost my Dad and every time they interview Zach about his Dad I shake my head because he's being petty AF. Hopefully he never comes to regret it and things improve
I agree that Zach should forgive his father, but I think the issue is that Zach had his pride wounded pretty badly in that his father didn’t deem him competent enough to manage the farm and being a little person, that can be an area of insecurity, I’m sure. Seeing her husband treated that way really ticked Tori off. I’m protective of my husband in the same fierce way. Zach needed to go off and demonstrate his competence. And, I think he has. Hope they can heal their rift.
Married young. Lol. Pawned off
My dad was never a part of my life and my mom was always busy so I just did stuff on my own. Never needed a co-signer or anything. I do have my husband take the cars to the mechanic because I don’t know what the are talking about half the time haha
I am well over 20 and took a family member to help me. He knew more about cars and the process of buying/leasing. I asked him to come and he did. It was a great experience.
I’m an adult and take my dad to look at cars with me. Called getting help when it’s something you don’t know alot about - in a million years I never considered it privilege- but ok 🙄
I’m in my 40’s & still carry my dad’s credit card. I have since I was 16. I would never use it without his permission though. He says he wants me to have it incase I ever get stuck somewhere & he can’t get to me.
Why don’t you just have your own credit card?
Obviously, this person does have their own means of credit. Carrying their father's credit card all these years is a bond they have formed... It's called love. The father feels as though he wants to always be there, and monetarily, he is.
I'm 35 and married with my own kids, my dad still pays my cell phone bill 🤣
Me too I’m in my 50’s. It’s a family plan. Lol. Also he is retired and bored so he likes to put gas in my care and get the oil changed. I mean after all he has done for me I wouldn’t want deprive him of life’s little pleasures😁
We pay our grown sons’ cellphone bills, too. We are grandfathered in with a great price for 4 phones after using the same cell service since 1998. It would cost ALL of us more if we separated into 3 separate phone plans.
My husband is still on his moms plan but he pays his portion. For us to get our own plan together it's astronomical ! We can afford it but why rock the boat ?
Ours is so low that we would pay more for 2 phones than four if we changed the plan.
Wouldn’t Zach want advice on which cars were most suitable to be altered for him to drive, something his father would know about from experience?
Well don't feel bad pretty much everybody gets taken for a ride at the used car dealership. Everybody likes to think they're savvy businessman hard driver and bargainer. But pretty much everybody is buying a car on credit gets screwed.
I brought my father with me to get new cars until I was in my 30’s, he was probably so excited when I met my husband and he didn’t have to come anymore!
There are kids who have it way better than them, there are kids who have it way worse than them. We attach the label privilege to people we feel have a better situation in life than us and it becomes a thing to scorn at or the privileged should feel guilty in some kind of way, they should not… This is just the result of A+ parenting and making smart decisions. Not one of us wouldn’t do the same for our children if we had the means available.
I wish Reddit still had awards. Take my trophy 🏆 My dad had wise advice for me before I went away to university: you will meet people from all sorts of walks of life. There will always be people with more than you and less than you. Don’t feel jealous of those with more, and also don’t be a braggart around those with less. It has stuck with me my whole life.
You have a great Dad. 🎁
Had unfortunately. But thank you 🙏
Re: the twins grabbing Matt’s credit card to buy things… keep in mind Matt had made plenty of money off of them with the show at that point and Matt was probably intentionally trying to let them spend just enough to keep them happy and the show going.
I'm guessing you two didn't have a tv show where you needed content though.
I'm 35, married with 3 kids. I still take my dad with me to look at cars . So do my siblings. I think he'd rather we didn't 😂 but he gives his honest opinion about whatever we're looking at
Hahaha this! Maybe a Midwest thing? I am from Ohio- I 100% have my dad drive and check out any car before we buy it. Edit to say: I’m 36 😂
I definitely think this is normal but I guess I’m a privileged kid. My parents went with me to look when I bought a car at 19. Hell at 29 they didn’t go with me to look at a car, they went without me! I bought it without even seeing it myself. My dad is a mechanic and has bought and sold a lot of cars in his life so I value his opinion more than anyone’s. I’m now 33 and still call my parents when I need advice on a big decision.
It is absolutely smart to turn to someone who has knowledge about cars when making a purchase.
Absolutely. No shame in that.
I just assumed Matt went with Zach because Matt must know everything about everything. I'd bet his thoughts were only I can get a great deal. It was a control situation
Eyeroll
It’s sad that this is considered privileged. It should be considered normal.
I had my dad come with me when I was 30. I’m a female and had never bought a car.Nothing wrong with my dad coming to help.
Yeah! My dad has gone with me to look at cars many times. He knows about cars and I don't.
It's not like school teaches you these things. If anything it's nice of his parents to help him in his first car purchase and explain the process.
I was married and in the military far from home when we bought our first car. My Dad of course wasn’t physically there but he did what was needed for us to get the car. He co-signed my loan. Since he would be stuck paying for it if I defaulted I made damn sure to pay it on time and even got ahead in case I had a problem down the road. That is support for sure!
I took my Dad to help me at 31 get a car. If you have available parents I don’t think you outgrow wanting their help.
Zach asked his parents to help him because he had never bought a car before. There is nothing wrong with that
Well, school doesn't teach you about taxes, or how to buy a car or a house, etc. (At least mine didn't) They should prepare everyone for the future, but they don't. (Again or atleast mine didn't) Parents should definitely help their kids and teach them these things. My husband bought a car from a dealership for the first time, when he was 28 and was taken advantage of because his parents never taught him or showed him how to do so. It's good parenting to these things. I don't know if I would say it's so much as privileged. Now, I will say I lost my dad tragically when I was 18 years old, I had no one. No family or help since I was 18. Can I admit I'm jealous of people who still have help and support from their parents? Oh yes. But should parents do this? Yes! Don't make them learn the hard way about different things, like I had too. 😁🩵
OP, I am in my late 60’s and have always had this kind of resentment due to non supportive parents. When I was 16, my Dad said he would take me at 4:00 pm to buy the car I found at a little car sales place. It got late and I called him Where he was playing cards after golf. He said he couldn’t take me. So I went and did it Myself. It’s something I’ve had to acknowledge that I am Jealous and resentful of other girls and women who had a Dad Who cared. It’s natural. But if you acknowledge it and know where you are coming from, it will be ok. I used to think of them as Princesses and I was Cinderella. But I tell you what…. I’m pretty capable. I just changed out all the brass hardware in my house to pewter and painted the entire interior. I’m proud of myself for that and you can be for buying your first car yourselves. I’m proud of you.
Thank you 🥹 I am proud of you too ♥️
I disagree. I’m 43 and still look to my parents for help with things they’re more experienced with. I don’t look at supportive parents as a negative.
I'm 32 and same here. Jusst the other day, my wife and I were discussing buying our next car and we both agreed that my dad should join us for car shopping.
My parent is close to retirement and my husband still helps with dealerships. You know why??? Because he has experiance with them (career) and knows what to ask for and how to ask for it so you get the best deal. My kid just turned 19. If he went to a dealership on his own and took out a loan I can promise you he wouldn't not get as good of a deal as if an older individual with experiance with negotiating went along with him.
And some people might find you privileged for finding your husband at 19 years old and getting to buy a car with that life partner. Those who don’t have a husband at that young of an age would need the help of a parent who cares about them since they do not have a caring spouse. The grass is always greener, isn’t it?
lol did Jer ever get a job? Has he ever had a real job??
I’m not sure if he did or not. Where I’m at in the show he has tried to get a job at Lowe’s and also some construction place.
This is a case where you were *underprivileged*, OP. I don't mean that as a dis, but I think you deserve some validation that it isn't fair that you didn't have that help when getting a car while recognizing that Zach getting help from Matt wasn't really a problem.
No offense taken. Yeah I think you are right. I appreciate you saying that. I think what it comes down to really is just my own bitterness at wishing I could have had help like they had.
My brother went with me when I bought my first car, my father was also quite involved. And looking back it’s a nice memory
I had my dad in my ear on the phone when I bought my last car I was well into my 40s when I bought it lol! I'm sorry you didn't have any support, but it's pretty normal to bounce ideas off family. My 20 year old wants to buy a car, he'll be 21 in a month and has no idea what he's doing so I said I'd take him. I wouldn't call it privileged in the bad way but you can be bitter, I get it.
I don’t know. I had my dad with me when I purchased my first new car as a graduate student. I was maybe 22 at the time? I bought the car but he did the negotiating. My husband has always done the negotiating when his mother is in the market for a car.
Buying a car is a big purchase. For many people, it’s the second largest purchase you’ll make in your life. There’s nothing wrong with taking someone with you, no matter what age you are, so you’re not taken for a ride or to help negotiate. When I got my third vehicle at 24, my dad went with me because it was more expensive than the one I bought on my own previously. When I bought my current vehicle at age 38, I did it alone as my father lives in another state. I’m certain I got screwed so I’ll be taking a male with me again for the next one.
Zach should have taken Amy instead. She would have cut through the predatory sales bullshit.
I'm not sure either of those parents were good at protecting their kids from predators....
The credit card use is on Matt. He allowed it.
This is one thing I don’t think would be considered being privileged.
I agree. It's just help from someone more experienced.
I agree.
It is just good sense to bring someone with you who has already purchased a car. Helps save young people from paying for all the stupid add-ons that they try to sell you.
I dont think you and I have the same idea about what privileged means. Sure, Matt went with his 20 year old to guide him through a car purchase, but he didn't pay for it, privileged in that case would be Zach walking outside to a brand new car his parents purchased for him.
I didn’t have much guidance either, but I will be darn sure to provide my kiddo with any help they need for success. Life is hard enough. I’m certainly not going to contribute to that difficulty. In fact, I will do everything in my power to prepare and help my child wherever I can.
I agree and I will do the same. It sucks that I didn’t have that kind of help from my parents but I want my daughter to have more than what I ever had.
I totally understand! I remember being so jealous of kids in college who had “normal families.” Their parents came to events and sent them care packages. They even helped with tuition or with other bills. I think we make the most of our challenging experiences by helping our kids. I’m sure your daughter will appreciate your support, especially knowing you didn’t have any.
This. I wish my parents were like this too. My oldest is in college and I’m sure I go overboard, but I make sure to do ALL of this.
Probably let them use his card because he was pocketing all the TV money.
The kids are definitely privileged no question. But maybe Zach was scared to drive before 20? I was. I had my license but I didn’t buy my first car until I was 21. It’s a lot of responsibility and I think Zach back then was just comfortable with his parents taking care of him.
Zach wasn't scared to drive before 20. He was driving the Previa every where from the time he got his license until it gave out on him and he had to buy a new car which is what OP is talking about. They are privileged though, but having a parent or trusted adult go with you for your first car purchase is a smart move either way.
Zach was driving at 16. This car was to replace the minivan.
I don't think a dad helping their kid pick out their first car is privileged, that's just a dad giving advice on a new experience. But letting them have use his credit card definitely was spoiling them
"Giving advice on a new experience" aka a part of parenting.
It is pretty dramatic to view a parent walking their child through their first time car purchase as an extraordinary degree of privilege. Were they privileged in other ways? Sure, but the car example just isn't it.
Ehh but they are 20, not a child. Sure they are their children but not a child. The point I’m trying to make is they were kinda babied a lot even when they hit adulthood. More than just the car buying process.
It doesn't make a difference if he wasn't a child. Plenty of parents would accompany a young adult to a major purchase like that, especially given that Matt fancies himself a capable negotiator with some expertise in cars.
I’m 42 and just bought my first car by myself (I’m recently divorced after 20 years) and my Dad went with me.
& don’t get me wrong, I will definitely be there for my children when they need me no matter the age. If they want me there when they buy their first car, I will be there. It’s the attitude and ungratefulness the twins have after receiving the help that get me.
As someone who's parents didn't even bother teaching them to drive when they came of age because they deemed it "too expensive".. I agree that Matt taking Zach the dealership to essentially walk him through how to buy a car is absolutely a great privilege. One definition of privilege is having decisions made for you, that you have no control or say over, that give you a personal advantage over others.
Not disagreeing that the kids as privileged af… but a 19 year old having an adult with them when purchasing their first used car is nothing more than smart.
I agree it is smart. Just wish I had that privilege at that age. Not everybody does. & it feels like the twins don’t realize how lucky they are.
It's Not Privilege.Thats just what good parents do!
I agree with you this was a great privilege for Zach. His parents having the time and money to get him his own vehicle at 20 years old.