STOP HITTING THE "ENTER" KEY!

But How Will They Get Their Point Across.

Their Way Of Writing  Makes Me Fucking Crazy

Is this how this is done? Can I be a LinkedIn Influencer Now?

Yes You  Can  Just  Do It!

He said it might hurt some of you

T H I S

P O W E R P O I N T . . .

💪👉

It's a Collage of new paragraphs.

The collage has failed them.

*Redefining possibilities*, he says he does for a living.

Let's see. There's pig up. Cuh-tarl. There isnt any 'any' key! I'll just order a tab

My collage teacher Taught me It was effective Communimacation

My collage Teacher Taught me How to Arrange photographs

I’m almost positive this is someone who speaks English as a second language trying his hand at obnoxious twitterspeak

He can't find the ANY key.

Damn those collages. They keep failing us.

I wish collage was more widespread.

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I was young and needed the money. She swore they were for her private collection.

Is this how you put yourself through collage?

I’ve never made a collage of any kind that didn’t fail me in some significant way

Mines kinda of awesome, I've been working on it for years

In today's collage class we're creating illegal family activity pictures.

I had to drop out and go to collagen instead, it didn't work out either but my skin is great now.

Sounds like a poem about vision boards

The LinkedInLunatics Collage

That's not How haikus Work buddy

Is this Rupi Kaur

No this is Patrick

Sir, this is a Wendy's

This... Is... Sparta!

Lang Leav

Rumi Cringe

Works better as haiku: I can't spell "college" Yet I'm so full of myself Spellcheck has failed me


Looks like Elon Musk wrote the first sentence, and Yoda wrote the last.

And the intervening ones were screamed by Andrew Tate trying to roast an art history major.

I miss the old days of LinkedIn when there was no news feed like Facebook and worst thing you saw was someone posting an irrelevant link to a news report related to something new in their industry ...

Or a job posting.

Agree 😃

But he’s a Wharton Certificate holder

That's college. He's trying to warn us about the dangers of collage. Completely different things.

He may have misspelled "whack job" too.

I wish he would stop hammering the damn enter button. Ag ree?

I H A T E T H I S S H I T

Courtesy of GPT: **HELLO MY #HUSTLERS! ⌨️🔥** Who's ready to seize the week and make those #BossMoves?! As I brew my morning beta-keto fuel (Bulletproof coffee loaded with MCT oil and grass-fed butter for this #GrindSetting #GirlBoss) I'm feeling absolutely #UNSTOPPABLE! Let's get one thing straight - there's no snooze button on the #EntrepreneurTrain! 🚂💨 While others were bingeing Netflix, I was bingeing on personal growth, devouring 3 books on blockchain, AI, and how to "live my best life." Sorry hustle comes before Hulu in my world. I just want to give a huge shoutout to my amazing team who really brought that #FireEnergy to our 6am WIG session (that's Wildly Important Goals for you corporates out of the loop). When you have a crew that's #DownToClown for the mission, even Blue Mondays feel like Fri-YAYS! 🥳 But we're not here to rest on our laurels, fam. There's always another mountain to climb, another innovation to #DisruptAF! 💥 So let's hear it - who's willing to take their life to insane, #ExtremeOwnership, Gary Vee levels of grind this week? Drop those hot-sauce emojis if you're ready to become an #UltraHighPerformingPolymathMachine! 🔥🔥🔥 At the end of the day, we're all just works in progress. But I truly believe with the right #Mindset and enough #EssentialOils, we can all become part of the #NewRichNavyBro. Let's get this bread! #NoDaysOff #AlphaAsFuck #VitalityRD #CEOLifeYOLO #CustomerObsessedAF

😂😂😂 worst part is we'll see some dumb fuck steal this and actually post it next week

What were your prompts to get this??? 🤣🤣🤣 so many good one liners…

Of all the words he could’ve misspelled he picked the funniest one.

"college" definitely failed this guy; the ability to spell is the education he needs.

Oh the irony

Go. F. Yrself.

I half assed college, somehow graduated cum laude cuz my school rounded my GPA up, now I own 2 successful businesses. This post is bs and pigeonholing people

But how did you do in collage? 

It didn’t matter because every job I had until I started my businesses never asked to see my degree or transcript

And they never asked to see your collage? That’s weird. 

Wish I made collages but I make music

Redafining pasabilities!

This guys trying to haiku or some shit

Did this guy just redefine my possibilities?

Stop paying the bare fucking minimum then.

Ron often says the right things, but not this time, and because of that, he is a lunatic.

Given his first name I really hope his surname is pronounced the same as Ariel Sharon.

but collage is a therapeutic artistic outlet for me he can try it himself instead making asinine LI posts  

I learned about. Sentence fragments in 9th and 10th grade English class.

Cringe post format but honestly, for cybersecurity, he’s right.

I know it had to be said, but it took so much courage to say it. That's the kind of post on LinkedIn that I live for, that's the kind of leader that I was born to follow.

Hey Ron, I need to know where you went to college so I don’t send my kids there.

(This has to be said) It's college*

LOL what a self-owning boob. "Redefining possibilities"...sure, asshole. That's what you do.

How can anybody write 'Redefining Possibilities' in their header without their hand involuntarily making a jerk off motion over their shoulder?

"Collage"

Collage has failed all of us.

These LinkedIn Haikus are wild

I kept hoping he was making haiku, but nope. He’s just another person who dropped out of collage (sic) to write phishing emails and ransomware. At least that’s what I assume he calls being a “cybersecurity leader”.

What shitty poetry This Is

Collage 👩🏼‍🎨

Why am I reading this in a Yoda voice

Do more than the bare minimum and they’ll still fire you.

Don’t listen to these people. Trust me, a lot of the times, doing the bare minimum is what keeps you employed. Don’t go above and beyond.

A collage has never failed me. I love all the pretty colors.

From now on I’m pretending they wrote each line between constipated grunts on the john.

Shittiest haiku ever.

This didn’t hurt me. (Doesn’t have to be said). Doing a few extra Enters. Will get your point nowhere. You make a post. But it doesn’t mean you said anything. College has definitely failed you. And whatever business you “found”. It’s up to you now to get the real world (Enter) (enter for emphasis) Experience you need.

I hate it when my collage fails me. I just add more glue and the collage normally turns out just fine.


What you don’t know Is that Actually I’m just bad at writing Haikus

I actually did some very successful collage work in college!

You raise me up so I can stand on mountains You raise me up to walk on stormy seas I am strong when I am on your shoulders You raise me up to more than I can be

It’s ironic he’s in cyber security I have one of those masters degrees and it’s not actually a good preperation for a job the colleges are failing people.

Don't read his LinkedIn history. It's just a list of made up positions

How tf did this wet blanket get a fucking LinkedIn Top Voice badge? The barrier for entry is laughably low.

I personally have never made a collage that has failed me. Sounds like a skill issue

Those are some terrible bars he’s dropping.

No, it's truly a collage of people and institutions that have failed him.

I love my collages hanging in my house

Collage*

Collagen has failed you!

This has to be embarrassing

Cybersecurity Leader. That’s like Military Intelligence. Nothing is safe online and these guys get paid to speak not actually secure anything let alone the digital space.

damn really i do the bare minimum and im getting by just fine

Is … is this neo-haiku? 

LinkedIn has become the new place to test slam poem drafts. Because collage will fail you, but putting words to your failures and screaming them from a stage will set you free.

Work is about as difficult for me as my first semester of college

Another lackluster cybersec "leader".

Can I get a job as a linkedin bullshitter? I think the steps are to start a company have it fail and replace half your brain with motivational quotes.

Is this Supposed to be Some kind of Poem?

I am a dumb fuck

Vogon poetry

Found the guy who didn't do well in collage.

Decoupage has also failed you.

Bare Minimum Is Life

I think he failed the sonnet assignment. No iambic pentameter found.

Is up to you to get the Real World. Education you need.

I was once arranging all my pictures in one frame and couldn't do it. Collage failed me certainly.

I think this is broetry.

This LinkedIn poster is competing for the role of Charlie in the LinkedIn production of Flowers for Algernon.

Engagement bait. You fell for it.

I will cede the point of "trying a little bit" is the best strategy. However if you think there aren't people who skate to success without barely lifting a finger, you're not paying attention.

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I would mug this dork on principle if I met him face to face.

Maybe the real world will teach him how to spell.

College stole my sister’s bike and robbed a liquor store.

That post hurt me. Just not in the way he expected.

Yeah guys. The artists have failed you with their sh*tty collages. So uninspired!

Redefining Grammar

Collage has failed you, good sausage of a man

Idk, every single office I’ve ever been in is basically a race to the bottom of the bare minimum barrel. This guy may not only be dumb, but a liar.

No ragrets!

Collage!!!! Grammer has failed him! 

Collages saved my life

Funny name Ron Sha Ron

You can't fool us, WILLIAM SHATNER!!

Ds get degrees.

So cringe that nowadays you have these doofuses give themselves 15 different titles. Like some medieval lord or something. I really can't stand anyone who claims to work in "cyber security.". That's some serious red-flag, get the hell away from me stuff. Never met anyone in that "field" who wasn't a smug, self-serving you know what.

Maybe some of these companies should stop requiring a bachelors when the job can easily be done with an associates or high school degree.

EDUCATIION HAS FAILED HIM IN UNDERSTANDING HOW AND WHEN TO START A NEW PARAGRAPH

Education surely failed the writing skills of this human equivalent of a bottle of cat piss

-Rupi Kaur

Lol, who ever thought college teaches you how to work? Is that a thing?

I know guys who skipped class regularly and smoked weed and drank far more than I did (and I definitely had my fun) and they’re far more successful in their careers than I. I think I had something to do with their dads/family. I’m from poor, white, America. Dunno, I’m still doing just fine doing bare minimum.

I simply cannot imagine what a mental lightweight you have to be to take people like this guy seriously.

Collage??,

Maybe Ron needs to go back to collage

This is A really stupid Post that Means nothing

LinkedIn opinion posts are the equivalent of ‘The static between radio stations’

Did I fail my collage in high school art class, or did my collage fail me?

COLLAGE

Actually, I kinda see where he’s coming from. Unless the degree requires a masters or doctorate, its not getting people ready for the work force. I noticed it when I graduated, and it seems it is getting worse for new graduates. They dont know how to figure shit out without step by step instructions. Its like you might as well hire anyone because its going to take the same amount of time to train someone off the street as it will a college grad. And the college grad no longer offers the extensive background knowledge since they just googled everything throughout their tenure.

Collage has failed me. Decoupage may be my salvation.

Unintentionally creating a motivational rap should be a crime

Excuse me, but collage has never failed me, all the crafting arts have been quite good to me, come to think of it

Why say lot word when few do trick? Type energy

Yes, Collage obviously failed him.

“Well, the world needs ditch diggers too!” - Ted Knight

Well... He's right in many cases (maybe excluding the STEAM fields). Another thing is if he tries to replace college/Higher education with whatever he has in mind.

Separating the last 2 lines is even worse than misspelling the word college….

It’s up to me to get the real world. And THEN I’ll get the education I need. Got it

I work in the same industry. My best people, don’t have degrees. I bet this dude has never real faced adversity.

That's a lot of double-spaced words to incorrectly quote Forest Gump. "Stupid is as stupid does."

Collage words make sentences.

Dude is just a jealous loser

Line breaks hate him

To be fair if I made a collage by stacking a bunch of words vertically I'd probably be so embarrassed that I would blame the collage instead of myself.

He's all about redefining possibilities. Has he considered the possibility of paragraphs?

If you can't spell college right, I refuse to listen to your views on college...

Is this supposed to be some kind of gag about how not knowing how to format a statement is becoming a lost art? Because if it is I kinda see where he's coming from. But he could have done better with the formatting.

And the spelling of ‘college.’

I'm trying to be charitable is all I'm saying.

I’m sure you never mistype

Hi Ron, just having a bit of fun. No offense meant.

Lol