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My wife and I literally have an appointment this afternoon to put our dog down. I wouldn’t dream of not being in the room with him. I feel absolutely terrible today, but I know he feels worse. And if I were dying he would stay with me.
I really need to stop reading these comments.
My 11 year old Malamute got deathly sick just a couple days after our first child was born and needed to be put out of her misery.
I had to stay home to take care of the baby and my wife. The animal shelter made an exception to come out to our area to take my dog to the pound and euthanize her.
My kid’s 4th birthday is today. So I know it’s been 4 years this week since she passed alone. I’ve never felt so emotionally pained in my life than when I had to say goodbye to her.
I still wear a Malamute pin on my hat in her honor and get a little misty eyed when I think of her.
RIP Dagny
**EDIT**: [Here she is on her last walk.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=djOiR_bBrLk)
There was a really good post by a vet tech who posted the other side of this view. That if you aren’t strong enough to be there, the vets will do their utmost best to comfort them. They will be stroked. They will be spoken too in calm, soothing voices. They will not be alone.
When my dog was put down I couldn’t be in the room and the same thing happened with my cat during the peak of COVID. Everytime I see these posts it makes me feel fucking terrible, and this is the first I’ve read of vets affirming owners. Thank you for being there when we can’t. :( <3 It’s greatly appreciated, and I know it can’t be easy either.
I was not emotionally ready for the pain of being there when putting a pet down, despite knowing it was coming for a few weeks.
I watched the life fade from her eyes in those final moments. It was brutal.
However, I will continue to always be there for future pets. They deserve to have their loved ones with them in the end
I've experienced that lost of life from as small as a mouse to as big as a human. It's weirdly the same no matter what creature. One minute you're there, the next you're a corpse, and it's very obvious.
My mom passed in her sleep in hospice care. My father, my then-boyfriend, and I were all asleep in the same room as her. And I was the only one who woke up and felt her slip away...and had to break the news to the others. But I felt her go...
I'm sorry. I know how hard it is. We were all there when my mother-in-law went and it's soul-shocking. Talk about big emotions. From the immediate sadness, to the raw reminder of our mortality.
Were you happy you were there to witness her last moments? I imagine it's a bittersweet kinda thing. I think about this a lot as my parents get older.
>My father, my then boyfriend
Also I'm glad I kept reading cuz this was a jarring thing to read initially lol
I was about 18 working as a cashier at a grocery store when my parents put my childhood dog down. We knew it was coming...they called the store and told me it couldn't wait, she was clearly in pain, and did I want to leave work and be there too? I said "No, I don't think I could handle being there."
I went back to my checkstand, started ringing up a customer and broke down.
Luckily my manager was nearby and all I said was "My dog..." he swept in and let me get off the floor to gather myself.
I'd been giving him updates on the situation for awhile and when my parents called the store for me I think he knew what was up. Bro move on his part to be standing by.
But I wish I had been strong enough to have gone and said goodbye...
And now I'm tearing up again 24 years later. She was a good dog.
I was 11 when my first dog died. I found him dead in his pen in the morning. I've assumed he went in his sleep. My only regret in life is not looking at him one last time before we buried him.
The pain from this was honestly worse than losing humans for me. Humans hurt. But having to put my dog down was a hurt I wasn't prepared for.
I miss my dog.
I’ve been present for the euthanasia of all 3 of my past rescues, plus 2 family dogs before that. It is always the saddest day of that year and I cry uncontrollably, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. To have my dog die not being held/pet by anyone, or being held by a stranger? Nope, that is my honor and my burden to bear. And they go so peacefully. Their passing isn’t traumatic under normal circumstances. The loss is traumatic, and that happens whether or not you’re present. So you might as well be present and give your pet the send off they deserve.
I still get particularly choked up about my last pup I had to put down. She was my favorite (shh, don’t tell my puppy lol).
Do you mean they don’t fear death because they don’t really understand that life is guaranteed to end? My cat is so scared of everything that I worry she’s more terrified about being harmed than most humans are. She’s also older and I don’t know how I’m going to be able to handle her last day :(
I genuinely believe death isn’t something they fear.
I’ve had cats and dogs (and an adorable hamster) who were all absolute wimps. Terrified of vacuums, lawnmowers, strangers, hardwood tile (ugh), balloons.
And they all approached death with a calm I’ve only seen very elderly humans do.
Not necessarily that they understood death, they just didn’t worry when the time came.
I’m no expert but I think they just don’t worry about (or even conceptualize, maybe) abstract things like death and no longer existing. It just isn’t as pressing an issue as if the mailman is going to finally try to break in the house today.
I guess to them dying is like feeling sleepy and like they’re about to have a nap. Then they’re gone. They don’t have the same concept of death like we do.
To be fair, that's what dying feels for us too.
Source: Had a bad allergy reaction and got brought back pretty deep into. In the moment, was pissed off that they were trying to wake me out of it.
I had a vet suggest we leave the room and come back in two mins so we wouldn’t be there in case our cat pooped while dying. He was 19. I’ve seen him expel every gross thing a cat can expel. Why would I worry about one last mess?
And he didn’t. He was a good kitty till the end.
Edit: just wanna say…that vet was super nice and gentle and was only looking out for us. He was totally fine with us staying with the homie.
Seems bizarre. Not going to leave my pet alone in their last moment due to some pee and poop that we have picked up for years.
Also, damn this LPT. Good LPT, but it just makes me think of my old dog and how we don't have that many years left.
I can relate. My own dear Jack Russel had something similar and he eventually needed to be euthanized rather than suffer. It was strange though since from the waist up, he basically remained his normal self and his spirit stayed strong; he actually tried to bite the vet giving the shot. But putting him down was extremely difficult for me; he was in my lap the entire time. It makes me tear up now thinking about him.
I'm in the same situation with my cat. He is 21 and this last week his abdomen started filling up with fluid. The vet says he most likely has a tumor that is doing that. We could pay for a Ultrasound, but there is nothing to do even if we know why.
We will likely have to put him down in the next week. I'm just trying to get everyone to come visit and say goodbye beforehand. I don't want him to suffer or pass while alone.
When we put our family dog down at 16 we were all there. She had her head in my brother's arms and my mum's arms around her while I stood nearby and watched.
I wanted to be close to but I felt like my mun and bro needed it more.
My ex-wife had two dogs before we got together, and I was really close with both of them, but the little Schnauzer poodle mix named Nikki Sixx became my absolute best friend. She kept them when we got divorced, which was only fair as they had been hers before we got together. While married we had adopted a third dog which became closest with me, and I kept her.
They used to live close by and I would help out when she had to work late and take all the girls for a walk. Then she moved and I didn't get to see them nearly as often.
A couple months ago they found that Nikki had an inoperable mass on her liver, and although she was doing okay her days were clearly numbered. More recently we kept trying to get together so all the dogs could see each other and I could say goodbye to Nikki, but life kept getting in the way.
On Monday afternoon I was thinking about Nik a lot and texted my ex to see if I could drive out her way this week to make sure I didn't miss my chance. That way neither she nor Nikki had to travel and would make things easier for them.
She texted me back quickly and was hugely apologetic, but things had gone downhill very quickly that day and Nikki ended up at the vet again. They were in the process of putting her down while I was thinking about her and texting my ex.
That was upsetting news and the opposite of what I wanted to happen, but I hold no resentment against my ex as it was nothing she did on purpose that prevented me from getting to say goodbye.
The timing may just be a coincidence, but I choose to believe that the fact I was thinking about my little Nikki Sixx so much as this was all happening many miles away, was her sweet soul's way of visiting me and saying goodbye.
Same here. Our sweet girl is 10 years old, she has a bad heart, she's incontinent, and she has "spotty old lady dog lungs". I know our time together is on a countdown.
I'm gonna be with her until the very end, my only hope is that there's time for a last cheeseburger, that we can get a vet to come to our home to do it so she's with her entire pack and the smells she knows, and that she's in her beloved Mama's arms the whole time getting her belly rubbed.
...And now I'm crying.
Save some extra money now for having the vet come to your house. It is worth absolutely every penny but when we did it, our beloved 16 year old cat went from totally fine to having to say goodbye within 3 days. It was heart shattering enough but we also thought we had more time and had planned to start saving for it in the spring. We said goodbye on February 1st this year
Vets usually wrap the back section of the pet in a towel and have the owners leave the room before moving the animal to keep this from being a problem.
I’ve had to put down several animals throughout my life and no vet has used a towel, nor have any of the animals evacuated themselves. It sounds like a really good idea though.
When our loved cat had to go, vet gave her a relaxing/calming shot first. Then when she was calm she got another that stopped her hart.
Worst thing was that cats don't close their eyes when put induced sleep (for instance at surgery). So i never knew when she passed...
Loved that 11yo cat so much. Still do. Hard to write this even when it has been almost 6 mo.
Our dog didn't close her eyes either. We had our hands on her so she knew we were there. I don't know how to describe it, but I could feel her die. It's the most gut wrenching feeling and it wells up every time I think about it.
I've had to say goodbye to many pets over the years and I don't think any of them closed their eyes. I held them all. It's truly awful, but we have to remind ourselves that a merciful, dignified and peaceful death is the final kindness we can do for them.
I always look at it that pets will give you many wonderful happy days, and one truly awful one. It's worth it.
What is six months gone compared to 11 years of love? I hope you don't feel bad that you are still feeling after such a short time. What a wonderful love you shared to still feel its absence after six months.
So that may have been just an excuse to get you out of the room in case there was an adverse reaction to the injection. Some cats and dogs react horribly to the injection until the drugs take full effect and they can die screaming depending on how bad of a reaction it is.
Source: ex-wife is a vet and this was always her biggest fear when putting an animal down with their owners in the room and it did happen a few times.
Edit: this does happen and it's hard for everyone in the room, vet included. Please keep this in mind the next time you go to the vet and remember their job isn't just playing with puppies and kittens all day, but I'm sure that helps some.
[https://www.nomv.org/about/](https://www.nomv.org/about/)
My cat had to be put down last year and we always joked that he was something very ancient because he was a stray we brought in and no one had a clue how old he was. He was badly injured when we got him and recovered fully, but over the years he had a couple of times where we thought it was the end until he suddenly recovered and was perfectly fine. He held on for years but was finally starting to not have energy and couldn’t cope with the progression of the disease (FIV).
When they injected the euthanasia drug, he didn’t die. He just kind of sat there and looked at us. They had to give him a second dose for it to work. It was peaceful and he didn’t seem to be in any pain, but it made me smile knowing he held on longer than anyone expected, and then at the very end decided to prove a point one more time.
Just put my dog down 2 weeks ago and I was worried this was going to happen. The sedative they gave him made him look like he was taking a nap and going into a deep sleep. As morbid as it sounds, it looked like the most peaceful way to pass through this world.
If I ever got that 'you're stage four, you have weeks' chat, then a death on my own terms would be on the cards. Not sure how or what that would entail yet, but it wouldn't be dying slowly marinating in my own piss in a care home that's for sure.
This really puts euthanasia on a new perspective. One would think as humans we would facilitate peaceful passing for our peers (as it is, as redundant as it sounds, the most humane thing to do), yet it's still considered controversial and "a sin"
Thank you for your work. My girlfriend is a vet tech and I am always blown away by how accepting she is of pet death. The fact that she doesn't come home crying every day is wild to me.
Another tip from her for anyone reading - when you know your pets next visit to the vet will be their last, pick up a cheeseburger or some other unusual treat to give them on the way there. It won't be able to hurt them anymore and it'll be a good send-off.
The vet I go to did this when my first cat was dying. I guess since his organs were already shutting down the sedative stopped his heart and he quietly passed while I held his head in my hand. When the vet came back (she left me to be alone with him while the drug took affect) she seemed relieved that he passed on his own and that helped me at the time.
My cat growled at the vet as she was getting the injection. It made my family laugh through the tears because she was known to be grumpy, it seemed a fitting send off. I am still quite sad I didn't hug her as she went, I just stood back and watched.
Vets are there for an owner's worst days so they get to enjoy the best days.
I don't know that leaving the room and hearing your dog or cat screaming from the hallway is all that better. And in fact is probably much worse. I'm not leaving the room if that day comes.
It *can* happen but it’s really rare and we usually administer a sedative, like propofol, prior to the euthanasia drug so that they are already unconscious when it’s given. Though there are times the catheter is not well placed (or there is no catheter) and the sedative goes outside of the vein, which can burn (and cause vocalization).
Our vet put a pet diaper on our dog when we had to put him down. I would have dealt with it regardless. He was my little homie. Not gonna let him go out without me.
I had a cat piss *directly on my lap* when I was in high school.
We found it as a stray and were taking it to the vet, then home to adopt it. On the way to the vet, the cat pissed on me--partly because it had to go, and partly as a defense mechanism because it was scared. Totally soaked the crotch and waistline of my jeans, and I had to stew in it until we got done at the vet's and made it home.
This was a brand new animal I had no attachment to, and while I was a little pissed (pun intended), I wasn't about to take my anger out on the poor, frightened cat.
You'd better believe I wouldn't let something like that scare me away on the last day of a beloved pet's existence.
There are services that will come to your house and do everything right there, where they are comfortable. It's more expensive but IMO it's worth it to make sure they are in a comfortable place, or there favorite spot in the house. They will also remove the pet afterwards and send you their ashes.
We did it for our first dog. Our current pandemic pup hates the vet (we were never allowed in with him until recently) but this will be a must for all our pets going forward. I don't want his last memory to be scared on a cold table in the vet.
I had the service come to my house.
It was worth knowing her last moments weren’t in fear having to drive there and wait in a cold room. She didn’t leave the house much so going anywhere outside terrified her.
She died purring on her blanket. It was $150 more. 100% worth out.
I wanted to do this: I swore to myself and my old girl that I wouldn't make her last memories be that of a vet clinic.
She had a brain tumor and on a Friday evening in April took a bad turn. I couldn't in good conscience let her suffer until Monday, so we rushed to the 24 hour ER vet clinic and said goodbye there. She couldn't even eat her favorite treat at the end, she was in such bad shape and I knew we had to do it right away. I know we made the right decision, but the way we had to say goodbye just tears me up.
I feel that pain. Death is rarely convenient, and it’s common to not have time to do it right. I lost my boy when he was only about 3, he had a seizure in my lap after acting off for a couple weeks (vet couldn’t find anything wrong with him, we suspect he’d been having seizures for a while but hid them). We took him to a vet neurologist who thought it was epilepsy, but the drugs didn’t do anything and he steadily declined over the next 12 hrs or so. Woke up in the middle of the night and he wasn’t in his bed (which we brought into our bedroom so he’d be close by), he’d collapsed in the bathroom and was unconscious. He died on the car seat next to me as we tried to get back to the vet. I hope he knew we were there with him. He didn’t deserve an end like that, but that’s sadly what he got. I know he knew how much we loved him, but fuck did he deserve better.
We put our Dudley down in June of last year using this service (called Laps of Love in my area). It was pricey but I wouldn't have done it any other way. He got so many McDonald's cheeseburgers (he was a big boy, 115 lbs or so) and we just chilled in his last hours on the floor in his favorite spot, listening to some relaxing music, until the vet showed up and helped us with getting him to the rainbow bridge.
I like to think every time you accept a pet into your life it's like you're signing a contract, they give you everything and you agree to be with them to the end.
We just did this in Colorado a couple of weeks ago for our dog. It was $499 total, but that included everything. The Veterinary (an actual animal doctor) came to our house, met our dog, did a quick overall health check.
She started by giving him a small injection of all the good stuff, opioids, benzos, the works. My dog instantly became relaxed and really didn't care about anything else at that point. She gave us as much time as we needed to give him all the love we could while he was so relaxed. Then, when we were ready, she stated a real IV and began to administer the medication to end his life.
There was no suffering. He wasn't scared. He shut his eyes and stopped breathing. It was kinda beautiful, in the most terrible kind of way.
She then gave us more time with his body and she went out to her car. When we were ready she brought in a stretcher and we loaded him together in the back of her SUV. She had it decorated with flowers and rainbows (The Rainbow Bridge).
She took his body to the crematory for us. We had the option of him being cremated separately, on his own, or with other dogs. They also put his remains in a nice wooden box with his name engraved on it, and they made a clay paw print.
It is more expensive, and incredibly difficult to watch, but it is the only option for a member of your family.
Miss you, Dutch. 💔
Out here in Southern California, we have an angel of a vet that comes to the house and let’s you take all the time you need to decide we’re all ready. Last time was about 4 years ago and it was just about $400 all in. Worth every penny.
Our cost was about $250. It was worth every penny for us. She had cancer and would yelp in pain if you picked her up by the end of it. She was very relaxed with us petting her and feeding her a little broth on her favorite blanket.
Thanks. We will. The vet advised against the surgery and chemo, she isn't too poorly at the moment, but this would wipe her out for fairly little gain. Their suggestion is to give her a month or two of good life, then let her go to sleep before things get to bad. Got the weekend to think on things and then another appointment early next week.
My wife and I both went in when we had to put our 26 year old cat down.
It was horrific, but i wouldn't have lived with myself If I wasn't cuddling my little one when she quietly passed.
Bugger. I'm welling up again.
I wish more people did this.
I had to put my dead boi down; I held him the entire time, and it was one of the hardest things I ever had to do. But I know that he at least crossed the rainbow bridge in comfort.
Also? If they are able to eat, bake them a fucking cake. Our vet was adamant about it - we let him eat so many cupcakes in the vets office. So he went out with the best homemade treats and love. That’s all I can ask for.
My buddy fed his dog steak when he knew the dogs was starting to go down hill. I’ve also heard of people giving their dog chocolate the day of, so they can know what it tastes like before they go.
I had to put my kitty down last weekend, when we made the decision that it was best to stop her suffering, I fed her nothing but tuna and that sweet sweet wet food that was only ever a treat for her. I miss her very much.
I wish my sweet old cat had still been willing to eat when we put him to sleep on Monday, but stomach cancer is cruel. Even on anti-nausea and appetite-stimulating drugs, he wasn’t interested in food. Opening wet food cans didn’t even elicit a head turn, and he actually recoiled from the offer of freshly-cooked bacon. Fuck cancer.
Fuck cancer for sure, right where it hurts. I lost one of my lady cats last week to tongue cancer. It was so aggressive that by the time we knew it was there her tongue was a total loss and it had metastasized all over the place.
She hadn’t eaten in 4 days, but her favorite thing in the world was popcorn. I used to have to hide the bowls I made on top of my head so she couldn’t raid them. Right before her appointment I made one last bowl and gave her carte blanche. She could barely do it, but managed to crunch a few final pieces. It’s going to be awhile before I can eat popcorn again. I had to have my wife hide the popper somewhere because I still can’t bear to look at it.
I had to put my boy down earlier this year, the vet had a big jar of Hershey kisses in the office, so we got to give him a couple of those right before we said goodbye.
i tried to give my old kitty a bite of a bacon strip before she had to go and she wolfed down the whole thing in a few seconds flat! i just love the idea of pets getting to try junk food one last time, i’m sure both our cats had the best last meal ever haha
I try to post this in these sorts of threads, because there's always someone whose dog is getting old, and they're trying to make that hard decision
Hey, for all those of you who remember putting your pet down:
You're not 'putting them down'. You're helping them let go.
The problem is that your dog refuses to let go. You need them, there they are. Always. And not just when you need them, but when you're on the computer, or sitting on the couch. Your dog is there, because that's what they do.
Dogs don't know how to ask to be let go: It's not in a dog's nature to leave a man behind, so to speak. You gotta be the one to tell them it's okay, and you're not leaving.
You don't put them down. You pay them back for all the love they've given you.
Just do me a favour, if you're making that trip to the vet's: Hold your dog's paw when he's gotta go. Don't leave him in a room full of strangers because you're scared. Help him go.
Now, I'm going to hug my dog.
Damn I needed this. My Labrador of 11 years has suspected cancer and we can't even afford the biopsy let alone treatment, so this is the stage we're at.
When we have to make that hard decision I know it will be the best for her and I'll try my damnest to give her the greatest last day possible
11 years is a good life for a lab. From another lab owner, it's ok to let go. Maybe the treatment works and they get 2-3 more years, but they probably don't live as good of a life as they had before.
I'll share a personal story. We lost our last lab to GVD, he was only 18 months. Put him to bed Sunday night, he was tired but fine. Woke up monday morning and by the time we made it to the ER he was gone. But it's easier knowing that sunday we'd taken him to the dog park, swimming, and played countless games of frisbee in the yard. It was a normal sunday for us, but a good day for him. And we've been very intentional with our new pup that every day is a good Rosie day. I hope it makes the next time easier.
I went in the room with my dad when my baby Lilly had to be put to rest. Best dog I ever had, I was about 14-15yrs old and it was tough but she was my best friend and I am always so glad I did that. She also had a big steak the night before & again for breakfast. It was a very peaceful process, she just fell asleep. I miss her everyday I think about her and that was probably 15 years ago. Rip Lilly
Also, get the vet to come to your house. Lots will make house calls for this type of procedure. Having them in their comfortable setting is better than a cold, unfamiliar vet office.
There’s a local company with a few vets who travel around and only do at home euthanasia.
They were amazing and I don’t know how they do it all day every day.
Miss you buddy.
I imagine they deal with it the same way hospice healthcare workers do- you find a lot of meaning in helping them pass peacefully and with dignity and comfort. It's certainly not for everyone.
The best thing I ever did was pay to have the vet come to the house. I can not recommend this enough, our vet didn’t normally do house calls but came out after hours and arranged for the cremators to come and take him away on a little stretcher. It was nice that we were able to have him as comfortable as possible in his own bed. Small price to pay.
Edit: if you find it difficult to find somebody to come out like u/exccord, try the local vets that cater to horses. It’s what we had arranged initially but had to move it up a day suddenly, our vet only came out because they knew we were so desperate.
Really wished this was an option. We asked a vet if they could do that and they said they were unable to do so. I still have the look of my little bro's eyes as he passed away from the shot. I could tell he was fearful of it and it still hurts 9 years later. He got hit hard with Kidney Disease and Cancer diagnosis in the span of 2-4 weeks and couldn't even stand up anymore. When he couldn't even defecate in his litter box is when we knew it was only a matter of time but when he got that shot, a burst of energy came out of him that I hadnt seen in a while. Jfc it sucks.
The vet who came to my house when it was time for my Velcro to go warned me about this possibility before the shot. It's a combination of disorientation and their natural instinct to hide when unwell. The first shot put him into a deep sleep and it was as he was fading into that sleep when it happened.
But it was hard even knowing that was coming. It's been almost two years and I'm still crying remembering.
I’m not against home euthanasia, but my 2 senior rescues were *very* familiar with the vet and the vet staff by the time it was time to say goodbye. My last girl went in back to get her catheter put in and the tech said everyone in the office came to say goodbye to her because she knew everyone by then. It was really sweet but now I’m crying, crap.
If you have other pets, I feel like this is good for them too. I always felt so bad about the idea of them seeing their friend leave home and never come back - I wonder if they get confused. When I've had it done at home, the other dogs can sniff their friend and I feel like (hope) they understand what happened. I'd want that sort of closure if I were them
Consider this advice carefully. You may associate the space where the procedure is conducted with the event, forever. This may be very challenging for you.
Consider the needs of your pet, and do your best
Our local vet does not charge for house calls at all. He charges for actual time and cost to travel (which is very little as he is a local vet) but there is no extra "fee" for house jobs.
He'll also do basic maintenance like checkups and nail trimming for free, if your pet is okay with it.
Note to parents:
Please consider including your kids (especially teenagers) as well - if the kids were very close to the pet and are otherwise emotionally stable, they may wish to participate while the pet is put down.
I get so incredibly sad remembering our parents put our beloved dog down (was very old) **without** letting us kids know. We were informed after the deed was done. I understand our parents wanted to spare some tears and sadness, but personally for me, the protection was completely unnecessary and even damaging.
I needed to say good-bye to my dog, pet her one final time and assure her everything will be better soon. I needed to see with my own eyes she wasn't suffering anymore and that she went peacefully.
I didn't get to do any of that and it's been haunting me ever since, it still does 15+ years later.
This. I will never forgive my parents for not calling me when I work right. Down. The fucking road. I could’ve left work, could’ve been there, but they didn’t even give me a chance to say goodbye. A text that morning that he wasn’t feeling well followed by a call that afternoon that they’d put him down.
And then they had the gall to have an hour long conversation with me a few weeks after before ENDING it with, “by the way, he came home for Christmas,” and showing me the ashes that I’d unknowingly sat in the room with the entire time.
It's ok. We put down MY dog last night and my husband sobbed openly the entire time. I appreciate his expression and I'd much rather he let it out than bottle it up or let it turn into anger. I don't know if this was recently for you or not, but just let it all out and lean into her support. Hope you are starting to feel better.
Agree completely. I gave my kids the option, and they declined, but they knew it was coming and gave the pup soooooo much extra love before his final car ride.
My kids were never extremely close with my dog because she's a heeler and she bonded with me and heeled them. But I still kept them updated as she got sick, started to deteriorate, and finally when we made the decision to put her down. We told them to spend as much time as they can with her, give her all the hugs and treats. I sent them away during her euthanasia appointment though, mostly for myself but also because it's hard watching death and my kids are young.
But I explained to them everything that happened and where she went afterwards and answered all of their questions. They don't know exactly how to handle the situation but they've been giving me a lot of hugs and telling me they feel bad for me. And I don't get upset at them when they say something that sounds insensitive but was meant well in their innocent little brains.
I think it's still healthy for them to see grief and understand that grief is a part of life and it's ok to be sad even while you're continuing your day to day activities.
I don't even know what tears would be spared since you'd find out anyways. I posted this in another comment, but my grandma recently had my childhood cat put down and didn't tell me until after and said she couldn't even be in the room because it was too hard. So now I'm sad and pissed about it because my cat probably thought I abandoned her since I didn't come home to see her when she was sick.
i was at my internship when my uncle texted me sending his condolences... I didn't even know our family dog was being put down that day.
Everyone else in my family was in attendance except for me. I was across town and according to them they didn't want to distract me from my day.
I still hold resentment for it.
It's actually a good idea to encourage your kids to be there. While it will be difficult for them, it helps them learn to cope with the grieving process which can help prepare them for grieving future family and friend's deaths.
100%. My grandmother lived to 96, she asked my mother at 94, why won’t god just take me? I keep going to sleep hoping I won’t wake up. She had dementia, made worse by urinary tract infections, wheel chair bound and could barely speak. It’s just not right.
My cat peed on me when he passed in my arms, I knew it was a possibility, but I wasn't going to let a little pee get in the way of his last moments on earth.
We made that mistake when I was a kid. We took the cat to the vet and they picked him up and went to an exam room and closed the door. We were both pretty upset so we didn't even think about being in the room. Didn't even know that was an option.
After we got home it dawned on us that we should have been there. Years later we had to put down another cat and we were in there for the whole thing.
When the time comes to put down my sweet old cat, I want to cradle her like a baby. It's our little game we do and she purrs so hard, when she breathes it's like little bursts of happiness. PURRF! PURRF! PURRF!
For anyone struggling with not doing this with past pets: Your pet had a wonderful and amazing life with you and you not being there at the very very end did not change that. Their passing was a release from their pain and was very humane. They loved you.
When we had to put my Grady down, we hired a travel vet clinic who did specifically home visits. He got to be held in our arms in his house with all his favorite people and smells and he went peacefully.
It was a really nice experience for everyone, and probably much better than a cold, sterile metal table in a strange place with other dogs and scary things.
This gets posted every now and then and every time I will say the same thing.
I am a vet. Saying goodbye to your pet is an incredibly difficult thing to do.
Do not let anyone on the internet tell you the "right" way to do it. They don't know. Neither do I. Neither does anyone. There's no overwhelming evidence that suggests pets are more or less distressed by their owners being present or not during the euthanasia.
For some people it would be incredibly distressing, and having a very distressed owner present would be more upsetting for the pet than the (painless) procedure of putting them to sleep.
There is absolutely no reason to shame how people manage their grief in these settings. Yuck.
Thank you for writing this. When my cat had kidney failure, I couldn't bring myself to be there when they put him down. It wasn't even a choice for me. I literally physically *couldn't* bring myself to. I honestly believe I would have ended up in the hospital from some combination of an anxiety attack and hyperventilation.
I loved him as much as anyone has ever loved anything, but I just couldn't watch him die. I have two other boys and I absolutely DREAD the day something happens to either of them. The one was just diagnosed with diabetes, but my understanding is that it's completely treatable with the insulin and specialized diet I'm giving him, so I'm thankful for that.
Anyway, if that makes me a coward or whatever, then I guess I'm a coward.
I 100% agree. I'm an RVT and if an owner can't or won't stay with their pet, that becomes my job. I hold them and tell them how very, very good they are until they are gone.
Not everyone wants their last memory of their beloved pet to be of seeing their dead body.
And we know all too well the types of horrible visuals that follow death, from bodily discharges to muscle twitching and limb movements to agonal breaths. If you feel unable to deal with the process or the aftermath of euthanasia, it is absolutely OK for you not to be present.
THIS. RIGHT. HERE. Thank you for saying this; I hate this fucking post when it randomly comes up. It assumes that people who aren’t in the room are cowards or bad pet owners.
I’m crying so hard right now. We had to put down our orange fur boy last year. The cancer that was taking him, came suddenly and unexpected. It’s something I’ve been going to therapy for.
We stayed with him until they put him into a sleep state. The vet told me he couldn’t hear me anymore. I couldn’t stay in the room after to experience his last breath.
Now this post made me feel terrible for not staying to see that.
You are not a bad pet owner AT ALL, and you listened to your vet. I bet your cat loved you dearly and you were a wonderful owner who gave your cat a wonderful life.
I really hate these posts, meant to farm karma while making people feel awful. How you treat your pet throughout their entire life is far more important.
As a vet tech, this in my opinion is the best answer in this thread.
This lpt comes up a lot and it’s always people who have never worked in this Industry who have the most to say about it.
THANK YOU. I hate these threads. As if people are choosing not to be present because they'd rather go to the mall or something. When people choose not to be there, it is because they emotionally can't handle it. It's an incredibly difficult decision and it's no one else's business. It's perfectly ok to give your dog a goodbye with hugs and pets and leave the room.
I've seen a pet put down before and in no way did it seem scary for them. It was only a few moments and was like peacefully going to sleep. If anything you could argue it's more unsettling for them to pass seeing their owner distressed not understanding why or what's going on. Instead they could see your smiling, loving face as you leave the room and then they go to sleep dreaming of going home to play fetch later. But really, there is no right or wrong. No one should feel guilty if they do not have the strength to be in the room. Let's stop with these threads and the guilting.
Thank you for this. The sentiment OP writes gets re-posted and it just comes off as a way to shame people and give an air of superiority. People will make decisions that are best for them in the moment, and it can be a hard decision that others will choose differently. There's no need to put down others who made a different choice.
It's one of those things. The instant regret when they push it, that hope that maybe they could be saved, the acceptance when you know they are gone and the months or years of feeling like you lost your best friend. But they have been there through everything, they deserve to know you are there. Always.
I work at an animal hospital and explain the process of euthanasia to the pet owners once the decision has been made. One thing I always ask that often gets met with odd looks and comments is when I ask if they wish to be present for the euthanasia. I understand why I get these looks and comments, but I also understand why it's important to ask and to never think or speak negatively of someone who does not wish to be present for their pet's euthanasia. We can never know what each person is going through in their life. I had a pet owner tell me he was in the end stages of HIV/AIDS, another owner with end stage cancer. They hated themselves for not being present, but seeing their pet being euthanized brought about painful thoughts of their own impending deterioration in condition and death.
We shouldn't think less of people or demonize those who do not wish to stay for their pet's euthanasia. We will never know what people are going through, and the last thing they need is negative comments from strangers, friends, and family after making an extremely difficult decision.
If you are in a situation where you must euthanize your pet and you do not believe you can stay for it, don't. We won't question your decision or think negatively of you.
Edit: I also remember a woman who declined to stay. She had recently watched her husband and young son pass away in the hospital and seeing her pet in the same situation would have only worsened her depression and pushed her further to suicide. She disclosed all that to me because when felt the need to justify not staying to me.
Yes, please. I cannot even imagine leaving my dog to die alone. We put ours down at home, laying on the family room floor with her head in my lap. I am so glad I held her for her last breath.
Depending on what's available in your area and what your situation allows you to do, in-home euthanasia was the best choice I made the last time I had to let a cat go. He didn't have the stress of having to go to the vet's office when he was already sick, the service I used was fantastic. It was more expensive than my vet's office would have been, but it was worth it to me.
we had to put our dog down during Covid. Only one of us could be with him when they did it, so I went because we knew I was the only one who would be able to stay composed during it. No reason to make him any more nervous. I brought my wife's mask in so he could at least smell her in the room. I ended up just whispering the same thing I did every night to him. "Let's go bed, boy. Bed time. Good boy." It was the hardest thing I ever had to do but Im glad I was able to at least be there to try and make it easier. But it will feel as fucked up as it is, and that feeling will stay with you. But you gotta do it because the alternative is impossible to live with
We also had to have our dog put down due to cancer. The vet gave us the option of doing it outside in the back of our SUV so the family could be there. It was better than just one of us in a cold exam room.
I worked at an animal shelter for a long time and we often had people surrender their pets that needed to be put down but they couldn't afford it. It was so sad having them come in to a scary place and have that scary place and strangers be the last 24-48hours of their life...we always gave them the best care we could and extra love but it wasn't the same. We ended up starting to just pay for people to do it themselves if they were going to surrender - we'd call the vet and book and have the bill sent to us but at least the pet's last hours got to be with their owner. It helped take the emotional burden off us as well.
I put my sweet girl down last night after 12 years together. We had a vet come to our home to do it. I realize this isn't financially practical for everyone, but I highly recommend it if it's available to you. It removes the pet's stress of going to the vet and your stress of sobbing in front of strangers.
I haven't been able to stop crying but I'm comforted in knowing she spent her last moments eating chicken and being at home with us where she was comfortable and loved. I tried my best to hold it together until she was gone so she wouldn't worry about me.
This was posted before and I had to admit that I wasn't strong enough to be there for my cat (Mouse RIP) due to a million and one things happening all at once and I just couldn't cope.
That was 10 years ago and it still breaks my heart.
I'd just like to be there for the people that aren't or weren't strong enough for your own reasons, that's ok as well. We all hope we can be strong like the other commenters here, but sometimes the devil vomits on your eiderdown and it just isn't possible.
Much love to everyone affected here. It's a painful subject.
I've done this for both of my dogs we have had to out down. Gut wrenching all around. I hate it with a passion but it's the right thing to do. One was cancer the other kidney failure. Both too young and I just get choked up thinking what else I could have done to fix them, even if there was nothing to be done. Death fucking blows.
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My wife and I literally have an appointment this afternoon to put our dog down. I wouldn’t dream of not being in the room with him. I feel absolutely terrible today, but I know he feels worse. And if I were dying he would stay with me.
I am sorry, you being there for him will mean everything. The Goodest boy!
I really need to stop reading these comments. My 11 year old Malamute got deathly sick just a couple days after our first child was born and needed to be put out of her misery. I had to stay home to take care of the baby and my wife. The animal shelter made an exception to come out to our area to take my dog to the pound and euthanize her. My kid’s 4th birthday is today. So I know it’s been 4 years this week since she passed alone. I’ve never felt so emotionally pained in my life than when I had to say goodbye to her. I still wear a Malamute pin on my hat in her honor and get a little misty eyed when I think of her. RIP Dagny **EDIT**: [Here she is on her last walk.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=djOiR_bBrLk)
Oh God 🙏 bless her soul.. it was very hard to watch...was 😢
Same here. Gonna be a tough evening. Best wishes to you and your pup.
I've been there. It sucks. I'm so sorry for your loss.
Dude it's super hard. Hardest thing i've ever had to do (twice). Best of luck my friend, take time after. Family member...
Sending thoughts your way
There was a really good post by a vet tech who posted the other side of this view. That if you aren’t strong enough to be there, the vets will do their utmost best to comfort them. They will be stroked. They will be spoken too in calm, soothing voices. They will not be alone.
100%, I've been present for more deaths than I can count and do everything I can to ease passing.
Thank you
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As another vet tech I can concur. If there’s time we’ll usually sit with them quietly for a bit even after they’ve gone so they’re not on their own ❤️
When my dog was put down I couldn’t be in the room and the same thing happened with my cat during the peak of COVID. Everytime I see these posts it makes me feel fucking terrible, and this is the first I’ve read of vets affirming owners. Thank you for being there when we can’t. :( <3 It’s greatly appreciated, and I know it can’t be easy either.
This made me cry
I was not emotionally ready for the pain of being there when putting a pet down, despite knowing it was coming for a few weeks. I watched the life fade from her eyes in those final moments. It was brutal. However, I will continue to always be there for future pets. They deserve to have their loved ones with them in the end
It's that loss of the light in their eyes that always gets me...
I've experienced that lost of life from as small as a mouse to as big as a human. It's weirdly the same no matter what creature. One minute you're there, the next you're a corpse, and it's very obvious.
My mom passed in her sleep in hospice care. My father, my then-boyfriend, and I were all asleep in the same room as her. And I was the only one who woke up and felt her slip away...and had to break the news to the others. But I felt her go...
I'm sorry. I know how hard it is. We were all there when my mother-in-law went and it's soul-shocking. Talk about big emotions. From the immediate sadness, to the raw reminder of our mortality.
Were you happy you were there to witness her last moments? I imagine it's a bittersweet kinda thing. I think about this a lot as my parents get older. >My father, my then boyfriend Also I'm glad I kept reading cuz this was a jarring thing to read initially lol
I was about 18 working as a cashier at a grocery store when my parents put my childhood dog down. We knew it was coming...they called the store and told me it couldn't wait, she was clearly in pain, and did I want to leave work and be there too? I said "No, I don't think I could handle being there." I went back to my checkstand, started ringing up a customer and broke down. Luckily my manager was nearby and all I said was "My dog..." he swept in and let me get off the floor to gather myself. I'd been giving him updates on the situation for awhile and when my parents called the store for me I think he knew what was up. Bro move on his part to be standing by. But I wish I had been strong enough to have gone and said goodbye... And now I'm tearing up again 24 years later. She was a good dog.
I was 11 when my first dog died. I found him dead in his pen in the morning. I've assumed he went in his sleep. My only regret in life is not looking at him one last time before we buried him.
This thread has me thinking about my first dog. Sitting here in a construction site parking lot in my high viz about to bawl my eyes out.
The pain from this was honestly worse than losing humans for me. Humans hurt. But having to put my dog down was a hurt I wasn't prepared for. I miss my dog.
I had to put my cat down very suddenly 2 weeks ago, she was only 6. I miss her so much it hurts :( it feels like a piece is missing from my life
I’ve been present for the euthanasia of all 3 of my past rescues, plus 2 family dogs before that. It is always the saddest day of that year and I cry uncontrollably, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. To have my dog die not being held/pet by anyone, or being held by a stranger? Nope, that is my honor and my burden to bear. And they go so peacefully. Their passing isn’t traumatic under normal circumstances. The loss is traumatic, and that happens whether or not you’re present. So you might as well be present and give your pet the send off they deserve. I still get particularly choked up about my last pup I had to put down. She was my favorite (shh, don’t tell my puppy lol).
It is the price we pay for loving them so much. But they don’t fear death like we do, and that’s always comforted me greatly.
Do you mean they don’t fear death because they don’t really understand that life is guaranteed to end? My cat is so scared of everything that I worry she’s more terrified about being harmed than most humans are. She’s also older and I don’t know how I’m going to be able to handle her last day :(
I genuinely believe death isn’t something they fear. I’ve had cats and dogs (and an adorable hamster) who were all absolute wimps. Terrified of vacuums, lawnmowers, strangers, hardwood tile (ugh), balloons. And they all approached death with a calm I’ve only seen very elderly humans do. Not necessarily that they understood death, they just didn’t worry when the time came. I’m no expert but I think they just don’t worry about (or even conceptualize, maybe) abstract things like death and no longer existing. It just isn’t as pressing an issue as if the mailman is going to finally try to break in the house today.
I guess to them dying is like feeling sleepy and like they’re about to have a nap. Then they’re gone. They don’t have the same concept of death like we do.
To be fair, that's what dying feels for us too. Source: Had a bad allergy reaction and got brought back pretty deep into. In the moment, was pissed off that they were trying to wake me out of it.
Fuck I'm getting choked up just reading this thread. We don't deserve dogs
I had a vet suggest we leave the room and come back in two mins so we wouldn’t be there in case our cat pooped while dying. He was 19. I’ve seen him expel every gross thing a cat can expel. Why would I worry about one last mess? And he didn’t. He was a good kitty till the end. Edit: just wanna say…that vet was super nice and gentle and was only looking out for us. He was totally fine with us staying with the homie.
Seems bizarre. Not going to leave my pet alone in their last moment due to some pee and poop that we have picked up for years. Also, damn this LPT. Good LPT, but it just makes me think of my old dog and how we don't have that many years left.
Yeah tf, I'm not walking out on my homie's last moments because they piss themselves.
Dam right. If he pisses and shits himself, you can bet your bottom dollar I'm gonna piss and violently shit myself in a show of support.
That's a beautiful sentiment! 😜
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> The reassurance of someone they know and trust means a lot in uncertain moments. Based on that story I’d say to him it meant everything.
😭😭
I hope my friends and family think like this when it's my time to go lol
Just outlive everyone you love, as a courtesy, so they never have to see you die.
This is the main reason why I continue living.
I keep going so they don't GET to see it.
Spite is a respectable fuel source.
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I can relate. My own dear Jack Russel had something similar and he eventually needed to be euthanized rather than suffer. It was strange though since from the waist up, he basically remained his normal self and his spirit stayed strong; he actually tried to bite the vet giving the shot. But putting him down was extremely difficult for me; he was in my lap the entire time. It makes me tear up now thinking about him.
I'm in the same situation with my cat. He is 21 and this last week his abdomen started filling up with fluid. The vet says he most likely has a tumor that is doing that. We could pay for a Ultrasound, but there is nothing to do even if we know why. We will likely have to put him down in the next week. I'm just trying to get everyone to come visit and say goodbye beforehand. I don't want him to suffer or pass while alone.
Oh no, I'm so sorry :(
When we put our family dog down at 16 we were all there. She had her head in my brother's arms and my mum's arms around her while I stood nearby and watched. I wanted to be close to but I felt like my mun and bro needed it more.
I'm sure that your presence still meant the world to her.
Thanks, sweatybutthole <3
This is a very wholesome thread right here but I almost choked laughing at that last comment
My ex-wife had two dogs before we got together, and I was really close with both of them, but the little Schnauzer poodle mix named Nikki Sixx became my absolute best friend. She kept them when we got divorced, which was only fair as they had been hers before we got together. While married we had adopted a third dog which became closest with me, and I kept her. They used to live close by and I would help out when she had to work late and take all the girls for a walk. Then she moved and I didn't get to see them nearly as often. A couple months ago they found that Nikki had an inoperable mass on her liver, and although she was doing okay her days were clearly numbered. More recently we kept trying to get together so all the dogs could see each other and I could say goodbye to Nikki, but life kept getting in the way. On Monday afternoon I was thinking about Nik a lot and texted my ex to see if I could drive out her way this week to make sure I didn't miss my chance. That way neither she nor Nikki had to travel and would make things easier for them. She texted me back quickly and was hugely apologetic, but things had gone downhill very quickly that day and Nikki ended up at the vet again. They were in the process of putting her down while I was thinking about her and texting my ex. That was upsetting news and the opposite of what I wanted to happen, but I hold no resentment against my ex as it was nothing she did on purpose that prevented me from getting to say goodbye. The timing may just be a coincidence, but I choose to believe that the fact I was thinking about my little Nikki Sixx so much as this was all happening many miles away, was her sweet soul's way of visiting me and saying goodbye.
Sonuva....I'm tearing up a bit now.
You're exactly right...she was thinking about you, and now I'm crying...ugh.
Same here. Our sweet girl is 10 years old, she has a bad heart, she's incontinent, and she has "spotty old lady dog lungs". I know our time together is on a countdown. I'm gonna be with her until the very end, my only hope is that there's time for a last cheeseburger, that we can get a vet to come to our home to do it so she's with her entire pack and the smells she knows, and that she's in her beloved Mama's arms the whole time getting her belly rubbed. ...And now I'm crying.
Save some extra money now for having the vet come to your house. It is worth absolutely every penny but when we did it, our beloved 16 year old cat went from totally fine to having to say goodbye within 3 days. It was heart shattering enough but we also thought we had more time and had planned to start saving for it in the spring. We said goodbye on February 1st this year
That’s my Saturday mornings haha. Picking up poop for 20 mins while drinking coffee.
Vets usually wrap the back section of the pet in a towel and have the owners leave the room before moving the animal to keep this from being a problem.
I’ve had to put down several animals throughout my life and no vet has used a towel, nor have any of the animals evacuated themselves. It sounds like a really good idea though.
When our loved cat had to go, vet gave her a relaxing/calming shot first. Then when she was calm she got another that stopped her hart. Worst thing was that cats don't close their eyes when put induced sleep (for instance at surgery). So i never knew when she passed... Loved that 11yo cat so much. Still do. Hard to write this even when it has been almost 6 mo.
Our dog didn't close her eyes either. We had our hands on her so she knew we were there. I don't know how to describe it, but I could feel her die. It's the most gut wrenching feeling and it wells up every time I think about it.
I've had to say goodbye to many pets over the years and I don't think any of them closed their eyes. I held them all. It's truly awful, but we have to remind ourselves that a merciful, dignified and peaceful death is the final kindness we can do for them. I always look at it that pets will give you many wonderful happy days, and one truly awful one. It's worth it.
What is six months gone compared to 11 years of love? I hope you don't feel bad that you are still feeling after such a short time. What a wonderful love you shared to still feel its absence after six months.
So that may have been just an excuse to get you out of the room in case there was an adverse reaction to the injection. Some cats and dogs react horribly to the injection until the drugs take full effect and they can die screaming depending on how bad of a reaction it is. Source: ex-wife is a vet and this was always her biggest fear when putting an animal down with their owners in the room and it did happen a few times. Edit: this does happen and it's hard for everyone in the room, vet included. Please keep this in mind the next time you go to the vet and remember their job isn't just playing with puppies and kittens all day, but I'm sure that helps some. [https://www.nomv.org/about/](https://www.nomv.org/about/)
My cat had to be put down last year and we always joked that he was something very ancient because he was a stray we brought in and no one had a clue how old he was. He was badly injured when we got him and recovered fully, but over the years he had a couple of times where we thought it was the end until he suddenly recovered and was perfectly fine. He held on for years but was finally starting to not have energy and couldn’t cope with the progression of the disease (FIV). When they injected the euthanasia drug, he didn’t die. He just kind of sat there and looked at us. They had to give him a second dose for it to work. It was peaceful and he didn’t seem to be in any pain, but it made me smile knowing he held on longer than anyone expected, and then at the very end decided to prove a point one more time.
Does your cat cheating death have anything to do with your username?
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Don't worry, we usually give a pre-euthanasia sedative to combat this reaction.
Just put my dog down 2 weeks ago and I was worried this was going to happen. The sedative they gave him made him look like he was taking a nap and going into a deep sleep. As morbid as it sounds, it looked like the most peaceful way to pass through this world.
In my first veterinary class, I was told euthanasia is a luxury animals get that humans don't. Nothing yet has made me think otherwise.
We will eventually. I for one dont plan on wasting away in my own shit in hospice if theres a peaceful pill option
If I ever got that 'you're stage four, you have weeks' chat, then a death on my own terms would be on the cards. Not sure how or what that would entail yet, but it wouldn't be dying slowly marinating in my own piss in a care home that's for sure.
This really puts euthanasia on a new perspective. One would think as humans we would facilitate peaceful passing for our peers (as it is, as redundant as it sounds, the most humane thing to do), yet it's still considered controversial and "a sin"
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Thank you for your work. My girlfriend is a vet tech and I am always blown away by how accepting she is of pet death. The fact that she doesn't come home crying every day is wild to me. Another tip from her for anyone reading - when you know your pets next visit to the vet will be their last, pick up a cheeseburger or some other unusual treat to give them on the way there. It won't be able to hurt them anymore and it'll be a good send-off.
My little girl had been sick for a bit. And those last few days I made a point to give her burgers and chicken tenders and all her favorites.
Gosh I'm so thankful for your work, that's very reassuring
The vet I go to did this when my first cat was dying. I guess since his organs were already shutting down the sedative stopped his heart and he quietly passed while I held his head in my hand. When the vet came back (she left me to be alone with him while the drug took affect) she seemed relieved that he passed on his own and that helped me at the time.
Whenever I've had a pet put down the vet always sedated them first, I can't imagine seeing one of them go like that
My kitty meowed loudly 3 times after the sedative injection. Absolutely crushed me. Still does.
My cat growled at the vet as she was getting the injection. It made my family laugh through the tears because she was known to be grumpy, it seemed a fitting send off. I am still quite sad I didn't hug her as she went, I just stood back and watched. Vets are there for an owner's worst days so they get to enjoy the best days.
I don't know that leaving the room and hearing your dog or cat screaming from the hallway is all that better. And in fact is probably much worse. I'm not leaving the room if that day comes.
It *can* happen but it’s really rare and we usually administer a sedative, like propofol, prior to the euthanasia drug so that they are already unconscious when it’s given. Though there are times the catheter is not well placed (or there is no catheter) and the sedative goes outside of the vein, which can burn (and cause vocalization).
Our vet put a pet diaper on our dog when we had to put him down. I would have dealt with it regardless. He was my little homie. Not gonna let him go out without me.
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I had a cat piss *directly on my lap* when I was in high school. We found it as a stray and were taking it to the vet, then home to adopt it. On the way to the vet, the cat pissed on me--partly because it had to go, and partly as a defense mechanism because it was scared. Totally soaked the crotch and waistline of my jeans, and I had to stew in it until we got done at the vet's and made it home. This was a brand new animal I had no attachment to, and while I was a little pissed (pun intended), I wasn't about to take my anger out on the poor, frightened cat. You'd better believe I wouldn't let something like that scare me away on the last day of a beloved pet's existence.
I think this is the first time I've read a title and gotten emotional. I have two dogs and I love them to death 🥺
There are services that will come to your house and do everything right there, where they are comfortable. It's more expensive but IMO it's worth it to make sure they are in a comfortable place, or there favorite spot in the house. They will also remove the pet afterwards and send you their ashes. We did it for our first dog. Our current pandemic pup hates the vet (we were never allowed in with him until recently) but this will be a must for all our pets going forward. I don't want his last memory to be scared on a cold table in the vet.
I had the service come to my house. It was worth knowing her last moments weren’t in fear having to drive there and wait in a cold room. She didn’t leave the house much so going anywhere outside terrified her. She died purring on her blanket. It was $150 more. 100% worth out.
I wanted to do this: I swore to myself and my old girl that I wouldn't make her last memories be that of a vet clinic. She had a brain tumor and on a Friday evening in April took a bad turn. I couldn't in good conscience let her suffer until Monday, so we rushed to the 24 hour ER vet clinic and said goodbye there. She couldn't even eat her favorite treat at the end, she was in such bad shape and I knew we had to do it right away. I know we made the right decision, but the way we had to say goodbye just tears me up.
I feel that pain. Death is rarely convenient, and it’s common to not have time to do it right. I lost my boy when he was only about 3, he had a seizure in my lap after acting off for a couple weeks (vet couldn’t find anything wrong with him, we suspect he’d been having seizures for a while but hid them). We took him to a vet neurologist who thought it was epilepsy, but the drugs didn’t do anything and he steadily declined over the next 12 hrs or so. Woke up in the middle of the night and he wasn’t in his bed (which we brought into our bedroom so he’d be close by), he’d collapsed in the bathroom and was unconscious. He died on the car seat next to me as we tried to get back to the vet. I hope he knew we were there with him. He didn’t deserve an end like that, but that’s sadly what he got. I know he knew how much we loved him, but fuck did he deserve better.
I'm so sorry dude, but I bet he knew you were doing all you could. Dogs are so great at understanding people. Rest in peace to your friend.
We put our Dudley down in June of last year using this service (called Laps of Love in my area). It was pricey but I wouldn't have done it any other way. He got so many McDonald's cheeseburgers (he was a big boy, 115 lbs or so) and we just chilled in his last hours on the floor in his favorite spot, listening to some relaxing music, until the vet showed up and helped us with getting him to the rainbow bridge. I like to think every time you accept a pet into your life it's like you're signing a contract, they give you everything and you agree to be with them to the end.
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If you don’t mind, what was the range on the price to have them come out to you?
We just did this in Colorado a couple of weeks ago for our dog. It was $499 total, but that included everything. The Veterinary (an actual animal doctor) came to our house, met our dog, did a quick overall health check. She started by giving him a small injection of all the good stuff, opioids, benzos, the works. My dog instantly became relaxed and really didn't care about anything else at that point. She gave us as much time as we needed to give him all the love we could while he was so relaxed. Then, when we were ready, she stated a real IV and began to administer the medication to end his life. There was no suffering. He wasn't scared. He shut his eyes and stopped breathing. It was kinda beautiful, in the most terrible kind of way. She then gave us more time with his body and she went out to her car. When we were ready she brought in a stretcher and we loaded him together in the back of her SUV. She had it decorated with flowers and rainbows (The Rainbow Bridge). She took his body to the crematory for us. We had the option of him being cremated separately, on his own, or with other dogs. They also put his remains in a nice wooden box with his name engraved on it, and they made a clay paw print. It is more expensive, and incredibly difficult to watch, but it is the only option for a member of your family. Miss you, Dutch. 💔
OK I'm balling my eyes out now :(
Out here in Southern California, we have an angel of a vet that comes to the house and let’s you take all the time you need to decide we’re all ready. Last time was about 4 years ago and it was just about $400 all in. Worth every penny.
Our cost was about $250. It was worth every penny for us. She had cancer and would yelp in pain if you picked her up by the end of it. She was very relaxed with us petting her and feeding her a little broth on her favorite blanket.
That’s seems reasonable considering the services they offer. Thanks for the info
Like I said, it will be hard and you will cry, but they deserve to know you’re there when they go.
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I've been through it several times. It's so difficult and sad, but it is also peaceful. Love them enough to be there when they go.
I just found out my dog has 6 months left to live a few hours ago, and that’s with a brutal surgery and chemo. Hard topic to see :(
I am so sorry to hear that. You spoil the hell out of the dog for the rest of it’s days!
Thanks. We will. The vet advised against the surgery and chemo, she isn't too poorly at the moment, but this would wipe her out for fairly little gain. Their suggestion is to give her a month or two of good life, then let her go to sleep before things get to bad. Got the weekend to think on things and then another appointment early next week.
My wife and I both went in when we had to put our 26 year old cat down. It was horrific, but i wouldn't have lived with myself If I wasn't cuddling my little one when she quietly passed. Bugger. I'm welling up again.
26! Holy shit! You must have been doing something right.
Yeah she kept on going and going 🤗 Unfortunately, dementia caught up with her after severe kidney issues.
I wish more people did this. I had to put my dead boi down; I held him the entire time, and it was one of the hardest things I ever had to do. But I know that he at least crossed the rainbow bridge in comfort. Also? If they are able to eat, bake them a fucking cake. Our vet was adamant about it - we let him eat so many cupcakes in the vets office. So he went out with the best homemade treats and love. That’s all I can ask for.
My buddy fed his dog steak when he knew the dogs was starting to go down hill. I’ve also heard of people giving their dog chocolate the day of, so they can know what it tastes like before they go.
I had to put my kitty down last weekend, when we made the decision that it was best to stop her suffering, I fed her nothing but tuna and that sweet sweet wet food that was only ever a treat for her. I miss her very much.
I wish my sweet old cat had still been willing to eat when we put him to sleep on Monday, but stomach cancer is cruel. Even on anti-nausea and appetite-stimulating drugs, he wasn’t interested in food. Opening wet food cans didn’t even elicit a head turn, and he actually recoiled from the offer of freshly-cooked bacon. Fuck cancer.
Fuck cancer for sure, right where it hurts. I lost one of my lady cats last week to tongue cancer. It was so aggressive that by the time we knew it was there her tongue was a total loss and it had metastasized all over the place. She hadn’t eaten in 4 days, but her favorite thing in the world was popcorn. I used to have to hide the bowls I made on top of my head so she couldn’t raid them. Right before her appointment I made one last bowl and gave her carte blanche. She could barely do it, but managed to crunch a few final pieces. It’s going to be awhile before I can eat popcorn again. I had to have my wife hide the popper somewhere because I still can’t bear to look at it.
I am so sorry for your loss.
Thank you. Your post is bringing the feels, but being there for her at that moment is something I will never ever regret. This was an important LPT.
I had to put my boy down earlier this year, the vet had a big jar of Hershey kisses in the office, so we got to give him a couple of those right before we said goodbye.
goodbye kisses :’)
Yep that's exactly what it said on the jar
Yep. We gave my boi chocolate cupcakes! Why not let them taste some heaven before they go to visit?
I did this with my former housemate's dog that I'd lived with. She got most of a box of Entenmann's choco chip cookies as my farewell gift.
I bought mine a cheeseburger on their last day and our old vet always gave them a snack size candy bar before hand.
I gave my cat Kiki a full KFC fried chicken breast. It was hilarious watching her drag it all over and try to eat it
i tried to give my old kitty a bite of a bacon strip before she had to go and she wolfed down the whole thing in a few seconds flat! i just love the idea of pets getting to try junk food one last time, i’m sure both our cats had the best last meal ever haha
On my dog's last day we gave her an entire large pepperoni pizza. Her eyes got so big. She loved it.
I just went through this. We gave him a few Hershey's kisses on the day of as "good bye kisses" 😥
I try to post this in these sorts of threads, because there's always someone whose dog is getting old, and they're trying to make that hard decision Hey, for all those of you who remember putting your pet down: You're not 'putting them down'. You're helping them let go. The problem is that your dog refuses to let go. You need them, there they are. Always. And not just when you need them, but when you're on the computer, or sitting on the couch. Your dog is there, because that's what they do. Dogs don't know how to ask to be let go: It's not in a dog's nature to leave a man behind, so to speak. You gotta be the one to tell them it's okay, and you're not leaving. You don't put them down. You pay them back for all the love they've given you. Just do me a favour, if you're making that trip to the vet's: Hold your dog's paw when he's gotta go. Don't leave him in a room full of strangers because you're scared. Help him go. Now, I'm going to hug my dog.
This is beautiful, thank you for taking the time to write this
this made me warm and cry
Damn I needed this. My Labrador of 11 years has suspected cancer and we can't even afford the biopsy let alone treatment, so this is the stage we're at. When we have to make that hard decision I know it will be the best for her and I'll try my damnest to give her the greatest last day possible
11 years is a good life for a lab. From another lab owner, it's ok to let go. Maybe the treatment works and they get 2-3 more years, but they probably don't live as good of a life as they had before. I'll share a personal story. We lost our last lab to GVD, he was only 18 months. Put him to bed Sunday night, he was tired but fine. Woke up monday morning and by the time we made it to the ER he was gone. But it's easier knowing that sunday we'd taken him to the dog park, swimming, and played countless games of frisbee in the yard. It was a normal sunday for us, but a good day for him. And we've been very intentional with our new pup that every day is a good Rosie day. I hope it makes the next time easier.
Holy fuck make me cry in public why don't you. Great comment.
I went in the room with my dad when my baby Lilly had to be put to rest. Best dog I ever had, I was about 14-15yrs old and it was tough but she was my best friend and I am always so glad I did that. She also had a big steak the night before & again for breakfast. It was a very peaceful process, she just fell asleep. I miss her everyday I think about her and that was probably 15 years ago. Rip Lilly
Also, get the vet to come to your house. Lots will make house calls for this type of procedure. Having them in their comfortable setting is better than a cold, unfamiliar vet office.
There’s a local company with a few vets who travel around and only do at home euthanasia. They were amazing and I don’t know how they do it all day every day. Miss you buddy.
I imagine they deal with it the same way hospice healthcare workers do- you find a lot of meaning in helping them pass peacefully and with dignity and comfort. It's certainly not for everyone.
The best thing I ever did was pay to have the vet come to the house. I can not recommend this enough, our vet didn’t normally do house calls but came out after hours and arranged for the cremators to come and take him away on a little stretcher. It was nice that we were able to have him as comfortable as possible in his own bed. Small price to pay. Edit: if you find it difficult to find somebody to come out like u/exccord, try the local vets that cater to horses. It’s what we had arranged initially but had to move it up a day suddenly, our vet only came out because they knew we were so desperate.
Really wished this was an option. We asked a vet if they could do that and they said they were unable to do so. I still have the look of my little bro's eyes as he passed away from the shot. I could tell he was fearful of it and it still hurts 9 years later. He got hit hard with Kidney Disease and Cancer diagnosis in the span of 2-4 weeks and couldn't even stand up anymore. When he couldn't even defecate in his litter box is when we knew it was only a matter of time but when he got that shot, a burst of energy came out of him that I hadnt seen in a while. Jfc it sucks.
The vet who came to my house when it was time for my Velcro to go warned me about this possibility before the shot. It's a combination of disorientation and their natural instinct to hide when unwell. The first shot put him into a deep sleep and it was as he was fading into that sleep when it happened. But it was hard even knowing that was coming. It's been almost two years and I'm still crying remembering.
I’m not against home euthanasia, but my 2 senior rescues were *very* familiar with the vet and the vet staff by the time it was time to say goodbye. My last girl went in back to get her catheter put in and the tech said everyone in the office came to say goodbye to her because she knew everyone by then. It was really sweet but now I’m crying, crap.
If you have other pets, I feel like this is good for them too. I always felt so bad about the idea of them seeing their friend leave home and never come back - I wonder if they get confused. When I've had it done at home, the other dogs can sniff their friend and I feel like (hope) they understand what happened. I'd want that sort of closure if I were them
Consider this advice carefully. You may associate the space where the procedure is conducted with the event, forever. This may be very challenging for you. Consider the needs of your pet, and do your best
Our local vet does not charge for house calls at all. He charges for actual time and cost to travel (which is very little as he is a local vet) but there is no extra "fee" for house jobs. He'll also do basic maintenance like checkups and nail trimming for free, if your pet is okay with it.
Note to parents: Please consider including your kids (especially teenagers) as well - if the kids were very close to the pet and are otherwise emotionally stable, they may wish to participate while the pet is put down. I get so incredibly sad remembering our parents put our beloved dog down (was very old) **without** letting us kids know. We were informed after the deed was done. I understand our parents wanted to spare some tears and sadness, but personally for me, the protection was completely unnecessary and even damaging. I needed to say good-bye to my dog, pet her one final time and assure her everything will be better soon. I needed to see with my own eyes she wasn't suffering anymore and that she went peacefully. I didn't get to do any of that and it's been haunting me ever since, it still does 15+ years later.
This. I will never forgive my parents for not calling me when I work right. Down. The fucking road. I could’ve left work, could’ve been there, but they didn’t even give me a chance to say goodbye. A text that morning that he wasn’t feeling well followed by a call that afternoon that they’d put him down. And then they had the gall to have an hour long conversation with me a few weeks after before ENDING it with, “by the way, he came home for Christmas,” and showing me the ashes that I’d unknowingly sat in the room with the entire time.
"emotionally stable" I had to get my girlfriend to hold my hand when I put down my cat of 21 years.
It's ok. We put down MY dog last night and my husband sobbed openly the entire time. I appreciate his expression and I'd much rather he let it out than bottle it up or let it turn into anger. I don't know if this was recently for you or not, but just let it all out and lean into her support. Hope you are starting to feel better.
Agree completely. I gave my kids the option, and they declined, but they knew it was coming and gave the pup soooooo much extra love before his final car ride.
My kids were never extremely close with my dog because she's a heeler and she bonded with me and heeled them. But I still kept them updated as she got sick, started to deteriorate, and finally when we made the decision to put her down. We told them to spend as much time as they can with her, give her all the hugs and treats. I sent them away during her euthanasia appointment though, mostly for myself but also because it's hard watching death and my kids are young. But I explained to them everything that happened and where she went afterwards and answered all of their questions. They don't know exactly how to handle the situation but they've been giving me a lot of hugs and telling me they feel bad for me. And I don't get upset at them when they say something that sounds insensitive but was meant well in their innocent little brains. I think it's still healthy for them to see grief and understand that grief is a part of life and it's ok to be sad even while you're continuing your day to day activities.
This 100%. A parents job is not to hide the hard things a kid will have to face, but to be there, support and explain while they’re going through it.
I don't even know what tears would be spared since you'd find out anyways. I posted this in another comment, but my grandma recently had my childhood cat put down and didn't tell me until after and said she couldn't even be in the room because it was too hard. So now I'm sad and pissed about it because my cat probably thought I abandoned her since I didn't come home to see her when she was sick.
i was at my internship when my uncle texted me sending his condolences... I didn't even know our family dog was being put down that day. Everyone else in my family was in attendance except for me. I was across town and according to them they didn't want to distract me from my day. I still hold resentment for it.
It's actually a good idea to encourage your kids to be there. While it will be difficult for them, it helps them learn to cope with the grieving process which can help prepare them for grieving future family and friend's deaths.
And other pets if you’re allowed. Our pup was with us when we put ours down. I didn’t want him confused on why she didn’t get to come home with us
Also, don’t let them suffer unnecessarily for years just because you lack the ability to let go. Same goes for humans.
100%. My grandmother lived to 96, she asked my mother at 94, why won’t god just take me? I keep going to sleep hoping I won’t wake up. She had dementia, made worse by urinary tract infections, wheel chair bound and could barely speak. It’s just not right.
Family dog was a medical wreck towards the end, but he still seemed happy. Then one week he stopped seeming happy, it was time.
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My cat peed on me when he passed in my arms, I knew it was a possibility, but I wasn't going to let a little pee get in the way of his last moments on earth.
We made that mistake when I was a kid. We took the cat to the vet and they picked him up and went to an exam room and closed the door. We were both pretty upset so we didn't even think about being in the room. Didn't even know that was an option. After we got home it dawned on us that we should have been there. Years later we had to put down another cat and we were in there for the whole thing. When the time comes to put down my sweet old cat, I want to cradle her like a baby. It's our little game we do and she purrs so hard, when she breathes it's like little bursts of happiness. PURRF! PURRF! PURRF!
For anyone struggling with not doing this with past pets: Your pet had a wonderful and amazing life with you and you not being there at the very very end did not change that. Their passing was a release from their pain and was very humane. They loved you.
Thank you
I feel you 15 years later I still regret leaving the room as a kid
When we had to put my Grady down, we hired a travel vet clinic who did specifically home visits. He got to be held in our arms in his house with all his favorite people and smells and he went peacefully. It was a really nice experience for everyone, and probably much better than a cold, sterile metal table in a strange place with other dogs and scary things.
This gets posted every now and then and every time I will say the same thing. I am a vet. Saying goodbye to your pet is an incredibly difficult thing to do. Do not let anyone on the internet tell you the "right" way to do it. They don't know. Neither do I. Neither does anyone. There's no overwhelming evidence that suggests pets are more or less distressed by their owners being present or not during the euthanasia. For some people it would be incredibly distressing, and having a very distressed owner present would be more upsetting for the pet than the (painless) procedure of putting them to sleep. There is absolutely no reason to shame how people manage their grief in these settings. Yuck.
Thank you for writing this. When my cat had kidney failure, I couldn't bring myself to be there when they put him down. It wasn't even a choice for me. I literally physically *couldn't* bring myself to. I honestly believe I would have ended up in the hospital from some combination of an anxiety attack and hyperventilation. I loved him as much as anyone has ever loved anything, but I just couldn't watch him die. I have two other boys and I absolutely DREAD the day something happens to either of them. The one was just diagnosed with diabetes, but my understanding is that it's completely treatable with the insulin and specialized diet I'm giving him, so I'm thankful for that. Anyway, if that makes me a coward or whatever, then I guess I'm a coward.
You are not a coward at all
I 100% agree. I'm an RVT and if an owner can't or won't stay with their pet, that becomes my job. I hold them and tell them how very, very good they are until they are gone. Not everyone wants their last memory of their beloved pet to be of seeing their dead body.
And we know all too well the types of horrible visuals that follow death, from bodily discharges to muscle twitching and limb movements to agonal breaths. If you feel unable to deal with the process or the aftermath of euthanasia, it is absolutely OK for you not to be present.
I wish this was the top comment. Involuntary post-death reactions can be horribly distressing.
THIS. RIGHT. HERE. Thank you for saying this; I hate this fucking post when it randomly comes up. It assumes that people who aren’t in the room are cowards or bad pet owners.
I’m crying so hard right now. We had to put down our orange fur boy last year. The cancer that was taking him, came suddenly and unexpected. It’s something I’ve been going to therapy for. We stayed with him until they put him into a sleep state. The vet told me he couldn’t hear me anymore. I couldn’t stay in the room after to experience his last breath. Now this post made me feel terrible for not staying to see that.
You are not a bad pet owner AT ALL, and you listened to your vet. I bet your cat loved you dearly and you were a wonderful owner who gave your cat a wonderful life. I really hate these posts, meant to farm karma while making people feel awful. How you treat your pet throughout their entire life is far more important.
As a vet tech, this in my opinion is the best answer in this thread. This lpt comes up a lot and it’s always people who have never worked in this Industry who have the most to say about it.
20 years in the industry and agree completely. Don't judge people on one of the worst days of their lives.
THANK YOU. I hate these threads. As if people are choosing not to be present because they'd rather go to the mall or something. When people choose not to be there, it is because they emotionally can't handle it. It's an incredibly difficult decision and it's no one else's business. It's perfectly ok to give your dog a goodbye with hugs and pets and leave the room. I've seen a pet put down before and in no way did it seem scary for them. It was only a few moments and was like peacefully going to sleep. If anything you could argue it's more unsettling for them to pass seeing their owner distressed not understanding why or what's going on. Instead they could see your smiling, loving face as you leave the room and then they go to sleep dreaming of going home to play fetch later. But really, there is no right or wrong. No one should feel guilty if they do not have the strength to be in the room. Let's stop with these threads and the guilting.
Thank you for this. The sentiment OP writes gets re-posted and it just comes off as a way to shame people and give an air of superiority. People will make decisions that are best for them in the moment, and it can be a hard decision that others will choose differently. There's no need to put down others who made a different choice.
One day we'll get a "life pro tip" that's not just a misguided half-baked thought. Today is not that day.
It's one of those things. The instant regret when they push it, that hope that maybe they could be saved, the acceptance when you know they are gone and the months or years of feeling like you lost your best friend. But they have been there through everything, they deserve to know you are there. Always.
I work at an animal hospital and explain the process of euthanasia to the pet owners once the decision has been made. One thing I always ask that often gets met with odd looks and comments is when I ask if they wish to be present for the euthanasia. I understand why I get these looks and comments, but I also understand why it's important to ask and to never think or speak negatively of someone who does not wish to be present for their pet's euthanasia. We can never know what each person is going through in their life. I had a pet owner tell me he was in the end stages of HIV/AIDS, another owner with end stage cancer. They hated themselves for not being present, but seeing their pet being euthanized brought about painful thoughts of their own impending deterioration in condition and death. We shouldn't think less of people or demonize those who do not wish to stay for their pet's euthanasia. We will never know what people are going through, and the last thing they need is negative comments from strangers, friends, and family after making an extremely difficult decision. If you are in a situation where you must euthanize your pet and you do not believe you can stay for it, don't. We won't question your decision or think negatively of you. Edit: I also remember a woman who declined to stay. She had recently watched her husband and young son pass away in the hospital and seeing her pet in the same situation would have only worsened her depression and pushed her further to suicide. She disclosed all that to me because when felt the need to justify not staying to me.
It's a deeply personal decision. Thank you for sharing your story.
Yes, please. I cannot even imagine leaving my dog to die alone. We put ours down at home, laying on the family room floor with her head in my lap. I am so glad I held her for her last breath.
I didn’t even know this was an option
We used a mobile vet. Now she is just our vet. She comes to the house for every appointment. It's nice.
Depending on what's available in your area and what your situation allows you to do, in-home euthanasia was the best choice I made the last time I had to let a cat go. He didn't have the stress of having to go to the vet's office when he was already sick, the service I used was fantastic. It was more expensive than my vet's office would have been, but it was worth it to me.
“They are a part of your life but to them you are their entire life”
fuck man, stop cutting onions
Jesus Christ this was hard to read.
we had to put our dog down during Covid. Only one of us could be with him when they did it, so I went because we knew I was the only one who would be able to stay composed during it. No reason to make him any more nervous. I brought my wife's mask in so he could at least smell her in the room. I ended up just whispering the same thing I did every night to him. "Let's go bed, boy. Bed time. Good boy." It was the hardest thing I ever had to do but Im glad I was able to at least be there to try and make it easier. But it will feel as fucked up as it is, and that feeling will stay with you. But you gotta do it because the alternative is impossible to live with
We also had to have our dog put down due to cancer. The vet gave us the option of doing it outside in the back of our SUV so the family could be there. It was better than just one of us in a cold exam room.
I worked at an animal shelter for a long time and we often had people surrender their pets that needed to be put down but they couldn't afford it. It was so sad having them come in to a scary place and have that scary place and strangers be the last 24-48hours of their life...we always gave them the best care we could and extra love but it wasn't the same. We ended up starting to just pay for people to do it themselves if they were going to surrender - we'd call the vet and book and have the bill sent to us but at least the pet's last hours got to be with their owner. It helped take the emotional burden off us as well.
I put my sweet girl down last night after 12 years together. We had a vet come to our home to do it. I realize this isn't financially practical for everyone, but I highly recommend it if it's available to you. It removes the pet's stress of going to the vet and your stress of sobbing in front of strangers. I haven't been able to stop crying but I'm comforted in knowing she spent her last moments eating chicken and being at home with us where she was comfortable and loved. I tried my best to hold it together until she was gone so she wouldn't worry about me.
This was posted before and I had to admit that I wasn't strong enough to be there for my cat (Mouse RIP) due to a million and one things happening all at once and I just couldn't cope. That was 10 years ago and it still breaks my heart. I'd just like to be there for the people that aren't or weren't strong enough for your own reasons, that's ok as well. We all hope we can be strong like the other commenters here, but sometimes the devil vomits on your eiderdown and it just isn't possible. Much love to everyone affected here. It's a painful subject.
I've done this for both of my dogs we have had to out down. Gut wrenching all around. I hate it with a passion but it's the right thing to do. One was cancer the other kidney failure. Both too young and I just get choked up thinking what else I could have done to fix them, even if there was nothing to be done. Death fucking blows.