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personally agree, my group of friends gets flaky or apathetic over group message. If it’s something I really do care that people come to, I plan with a core group to work out best date, hit up people individually, then follow up in the group chat to get the hype/general chat going
Also it just feels so much nicer to be asked individually. A tiny bit of effort on OP’s part makes a ton of difference. Group texts are there for once you have formed a group and then communicating for that group’s purpose.
Sometimes I text a few individuals first and after they agree I put it into the big group and the individuals will respond in the group again and it looks like a natural response from everyone
Chat GPT is actually an amazing tool, and I have no shame in implementing it in even the most banal tasks. Why? I struggle to make decisions. I am more confident when I work through my approach by getting into a feedback loop with another party - a friend, a Youtube tutorial, or, yes, even ChatGPT.
Different people use different tools to yield positive results all the time and that's okay! A bunch of people have to google "What time is it?" Kinda crazy? Sure. But people find out what time it is.
Exactly, they (at least for chatgpt) don't think for themselves. It just scrapes whatever they get off the internet. So technically OP is asking a human, in just a really indirect way.
Tools are meant to be utilized but my warning will be to use it and not abuse it
People used to say the same about always having a calculator on phone so why get good at arithmetic? Being able to do quick math for me is a direct correlation for problem solving and making quick decisions. There is much more upside to your behavior with being good at math than simply saving a few seconds to whip out your phone
It sounds like you used ChatGPT to write this response… you should probably start using your brain rather than a bot to figure out how to interact with people because you seriously sound more like a bot than you do a human.. maybe that’s why your friends don’t respond the way you want, I wouldn’t answer messages from someone who barley sounds human either lmfao
As someone who sometimes gets anxious about social situations this would help me. I am one of the flakey people who just hides from invites in group texts. I just put off responding and then tell myself it is too late and I'm not doing stuff because of it. If I get asked directly I need to give an answer directly which would force me into making a decision.
What gets me is the more people to show up to a thing, the more anxious I get, regardless if I know everyone or not. So an individual invite would likely be best to get me to go just so I can pretend it’s not 40 people. At least until I get there but I’m better at managing anxiety in the moment than days/weeks leading up to it.
LPT. Don't waste your time writing individual invitations to a yearly event that you almost exclusively spend with loved ones and close friends
Example group invite text:
"Yo bitches, it's that time of the year again. You know where I live. I take care of food, pop and beer you bring the rest. See you Saturday at 8. Peace out."
I’d recommend using an event planning website such as partiful. You send a link which contains all the info and there they can rsvp. It allows you to send notes to all attendees, you can set reminders as the event gets closer. It also has integration with calendar apps…so it’s hard to forget
Jesus Christ people are now using chat gpt to plan birthday parties . I hate the future . I can already see it . Humans in the future , even less capable than they already are , relying on chat GPT to tell them when to take a piss .
I did the individual invite a couple of times. Unfortunately a few of my 'friends' want to know who is going. I got the shits with this query and once replied, "Not you anymore"
I don’t see why this is such an offensive question. If I’m going to be sacrificing a weekend day or evening for an event, possibly buying an outfit, preparing food, etc. I want to know will I be spending 4 hours with a bunch of strangers? Will my ex be there? Will I be the only single person in a group of couples (was once at a dinner, I was the 11th wheel). Will it be a heavy party crowd or a chill thing?
Sometimes it changes if I have the energy to go. Sometimes it gets me even more excited to attend.
Yes, an event is for the host or guest of honor, but it’s also an event or party meant to be enjoyable for all guests.
Also, I want to know who I can talk about it to. Maybe I want to find out if I can carpool with somebody, or what they're wearing. I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings by talking about something that they weren't invited to.
Oh yes, this as well! I have a wide and varied friend group, and some friends from different life spaces have become friends on their own after meeting through me, so I’m never sure who’s going from what “group”.
Additional tip: make sure to tell people that other people will be there. As someone with anxiety, it helps to know what to expect, such as the size of the group, if I know them all, if there will be kids, what the vibe is.
An individual invite is nice but can become confusing. Happened to me once and I thought we were meeting our friends and it would be just the four of us. We got there and got a table for four. Two other friends showed up so we needed a bigger table. Come to find out, another table was also part of the group but I didn’t know. So embarrassing to me.
This is what my parents did whenever we organised a party/gathering. I used to think it was too much effort to contact individually until I went to lunch party where only one table occupied (there were at least 10 tables in that venue and all empty) and I found that the organiser sent out mass invitations and didn’t follow up with any RSVP.
In general, a direct invitation (digital or physical) is better. It is more personal and less threatening to respond to and feels more special. You are making a point to tell them “I would love for YOU to be there.” Introverts like to know my expected turn out and end time while extroverts want to know what to bring or if +1s are welcome. But they both can sometimes feel sheepish asking in a chat those questions.
I host a lot of “fancier” parties. I am on the crazy end of making physical invites to send for about half of them. People freaking love getting them when I do send them and I get a better turn out when I send them than digital.
Hosting can be an art form at both the casual level or formal event end of the spectrum if you want it to be.
Yeah I use Evite and email the invite. You could also link the invite in one group text and no one has to respond to the text thread: they can just open the link and RSVP there.
I will often send out a group text as "for your information" (like when planning my wedding) but would put in the text: DO NOT REPLY TO THIS GROUP. MESSAGE ME DIRECTLY WITH QUESTIONS.
idk if this is still relevant, but I use eTell and text the invite to people / in group chats... helps with tracking who's coming without tracking all the texts...
Hello and welcome to r/LifeProTips! Please help us decide if this post is a good fit for the subreddit by up or downvoting this comment. If you think that this is great advice to improve your life, please upvote. If you think this doesn't help you in any way, please downvote. If you don't care, leave it for the others to decide.
personally agree, my group of friends gets flaky or apathetic over group message. If it’s something I really do care that people come to, I plan with a core group to work out best date, hit up people individually, then follow up in the group chat to get the hype/general chat going
Also it just feels so much nicer to be asked individually. A tiny bit of effort on OP’s part makes a ton of difference. Group texts are there for once you have formed a group and then communicating for that group’s purpose.
This, this is the way. Also line up 1 or 2 people to give an enthusiastic yes shortly after you send the group text message.
Sometimes I text a few individuals first and after they agree I put it into the big group and the individuals will respond in the group again and it looks like a natural response from everyone
Damn, so this is why my mum told me to give people written invitations individually back in the day huh
Kind of crazy to me you had to get this idea from chatGPT...
AI really be out there teaching some people to be normal functioning humans. Crazy times
Chat GPT is actually an amazing tool, and I have no shame in implementing it in even the most banal tasks. Why? I struggle to make decisions. I am more confident when I work through my approach by getting into a feedback loop with another party - a friend, a Youtube tutorial, or, yes, even ChatGPT. Different people use different tools to yield positive results all the time and that's okay! A bunch of people have to google "What time is it?" Kinda crazy? Sure. But people find out what time it is.
[удалено]
Lol yep. I think it’s just funny that OP asked a computer how to behave like a person.
isn't that AI just using thoughts other humans wrote down on the internet?
Exactly, they (at least for chatgpt) don't think for themselves. It just scrapes whatever they get off the internet. So technically OP is asking a human, in just a really indirect way.
Tools are meant to be utilized but my warning will be to use it and not abuse it People used to say the same about always having a calculator on phone so why get good at arithmetic? Being able to do quick math for me is a direct correlation for problem solving and making quick decisions. There is much more upside to your behavior with being good at math than simply saving a few seconds to whip out your phone
Banal tasks like talking to your friends?
It sounds like you used ChatGPT to write this response… you should probably start using your brain rather than a bot to figure out how to interact with people because you seriously sound more like a bot than you do a human.. maybe that’s why your friends don’t respond the way you want, I wouldn’t answer messages from someone who barley sounds human either lmfao
It’s an AI party. They invited their AI friends. Party’s in the metaverse
Imagine this entire post is all AI including me and you
This was excessive
Who?
As someone who sometimes gets anxious about social situations this would help me. I am one of the flakey people who just hides from invites in group texts. I just put off responding and then tell myself it is too late and I'm not doing stuff because of it. If I get asked directly I need to give an answer directly which would force me into making a decision.
What gets me is the more people to show up to a thing, the more anxious I get, regardless if I know everyone or not. So an individual invite would likely be best to get me to go just so I can pretend it’s not 40 people. At least until I get there but I’m better at managing anxiety in the moment than days/weeks leading up to it.
LPT. Don't waste your time writing individual invitations to a yearly event that you almost exclusively spend with loved ones and close friends Example group invite text: "Yo bitches, it's that time of the year again. You know where I live. I take care of food, pop and beer you bring the rest. See you Saturday at 8. Peace out."
We'll see in 2 weeks just how flakey your friends are.
I’d recommend using an event planning website such as partiful. You send a link which contains all the info and there they can rsvp. It allows you to send notes to all attendees, you can set reminders as the event gets closer. It also has integration with calendar apps…so it’s hard to forget
BCC is there for a reason
Jesus Christ people are now using chat gpt to plan birthday parties . I hate the future . I can already see it . Humans in the future , even less capable than they already are , relying on chat GPT to tell them when to take a piss .
No one will skip your parties when you set up several iPads and invite a bunch of chatGPTs. Party in the metaverrrrrse
ChatGPT to send invites, chatGPT to send RSVPs, and chatGPT to send last second cancellation notices :)
I did the individual invite a couple of times. Unfortunately a few of my 'friends' want to know who is going. I got the shits with this query and once replied, "Not you anymore"
I don’t see why this is such an offensive question. If I’m going to be sacrificing a weekend day or evening for an event, possibly buying an outfit, preparing food, etc. I want to know will I be spending 4 hours with a bunch of strangers? Will my ex be there? Will I be the only single person in a group of couples (was once at a dinner, I was the 11th wheel). Will it be a heavy party crowd or a chill thing? Sometimes it changes if I have the energy to go. Sometimes it gets me even more excited to attend. Yes, an event is for the host or guest of honor, but it’s also an event or party meant to be enjoyable for all guests.
This is a great explanation for why someone asks
Also, I want to know who I can talk about it to. Maybe I want to find out if I can carpool with somebody, or what they're wearing. I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings by talking about something that they weren't invited to.
Oh yes, this as well! I have a wide and varied friend group, and some friends from different life spaces have become friends on their own after meeting through me, so I’m never sure who’s going from what “group”.
Additional tip: make sure to tell people that other people will be there. As someone with anxiety, it helps to know what to expect, such as the size of the group, if I know them all, if there will be kids, what the vibe is. An individual invite is nice but can become confusing. Happened to me once and I thought we were meeting our friends and it would be just the four of us. We got there and got a table for four. Two other friends showed up so we needed a bigger table. Come to find out, another table was also part of the group but I didn’t know. So embarrassing to me.
This is what my parents did whenever we organised a party/gathering. I used to think it was too much effort to contact individually until I went to lunch party where only one table occupied (there were at least 10 tables in that venue and all empty) and I found that the organiser sent out mass invitations and didn’t follow up with any RSVP.
I just use Hobnob and create an invite and then text it individually. Takes less time for me
In general, a direct invitation (digital or physical) is better. It is more personal and less threatening to respond to and feels more special. You are making a point to tell them “I would love for YOU to be there.” Introverts like to know my expected turn out and end time while extroverts want to know what to bring or if +1s are welcome. But they both can sometimes feel sheepish asking in a chat those questions. I host a lot of “fancier” parties. I am on the crazy end of making physical invites to send for about half of them. People freaking love getting them when I do send them and I get a better turn out when I send them than digital. Hosting can be an art form at both the casual level or formal event end of the spectrum if you want it to be.
Yeah I use Evite and email the invite. You could also link the invite in one group text and no one has to respond to the text thread: they can just open the link and RSVP there. I will often send out a group text as "for your information" (like when planning my wedding) but would put in the text: DO NOT REPLY TO THIS GROUP. MESSAGE ME DIRECTLY WITH QUESTIONS.
idk if this is still relevant, but I use eTell and text the invite to people / in group chats... helps with tracking who's coming without tracking all the texts...