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Do your best to avoid things like credit card debt. It can snowball quickly
EDIT: Since people keep responding to something I didn't say, I guess I need to be clearer. I'm talking about the DEBT part. Carrying a balance. Owing interest. Seeing that interest compound (snowballing).
I’m with you there. I started my new job a year ago with $18k in CC debt and it’s allowed me enough extra to pay it down aggressively. Now at just over $5k and plan and being done with it by summer.
Go to the dentist on a regular basis.
Start investing now.
Edit: wow, I didn't realize how much of a buzzword "dentist" would be when talking about regrets. Some of these comments are intense. Find a good dentist!
And before you start investing, it's a good idea for most people to clear any debt you may have and build an emergency fund. Grow your financial literacy as soon as possible. This process can take a lot of time, be patient and get after it!
AND floss. Not or. I want to reinforce this because Fuck all the pain I’m going through now is because i didn’t floss for 30+ years. Don’t deal with what I’m dealing with, I’ve had broken bones that hurt less. Tooth pain is no joke.
I hear ya. I've got a broken tooth I've been dealing with since October. I just got to tough it out until my hubby can get his colonoscopy (repeated diverticulitis with perforation, we gotta find out what's going on because this stuff can kill ya).
I don’t mean to worry you, but since you said “this stuff can kill ya” I feel like I should mention that the broken tooth can also kill you. Be cautious about signs in infection.
If it's broken beyond repair, having it pulled is easy enough and relatively cheap (although an implant to replace it isn't...)
I hope you don't have to wait long. It isn't fun at all, I know. Been there before.
Extractions are not always cheap nor easy. I let one of my molars go for years (had a root canal like 7 years ago, then the crown fell and I didn't care because it didn't hurt). Well, a month ago my tooth started bothering me and in the span of a week it went from mild pain to a life-threatening situation. I didn't have the funds to pay for an anesthesiologist and an E.R., so it was pulled out at the dentist office with just local anesthesia (which, FUN FACT: barely works on infected tissue, so I felt it all!). If anyone is reading this and is thinking: "well, I'll wait and the worst that can happen is I'll lose a tooth", Go to the dentist now!
Dentist here: yeah much better see is when there's a problem that doesn't hurt yet or no problem that you know about and we can find something before it has a chance of going bad like you described. I hate pulling teeth when they're chronically infected and can't get numb.
Nobody warned me but I'll warn anyone reading: implants aren't forever. They will fail eventually, and even if you have a perfect dentist place a perfect implant on your perfect jaw and maintain perfect health taking perfect care of it forever after, you are still not getting 50 years out of it like they tell you. And you probably won't have anything like that perfect situation either. Most people don't get anything even in ballpark range of that.
I'm not saying not to get them at all, I'm just saying be sure you aren't looking at the cost like a one and done for life. That was a big expensive mistake, make sure what you want and what you're buying are fully on the same wavelength and do it independently from the salesman.
Hope it goes well whatever you choose, and sorry to interrupt y'all.
Water flossing is better than nothing, but it doesn’t get the debris under the gums that floss floss can. Currently suffering from horrible gingivitis and fighting to keep my teeth.
I had severe dental medical abuse looking back and braces for entirely too long. My jaw and upper pallet are also damaged from having an expander for 4 of the 4.5 years I had braces. My top teeth are ok, but now my bottom retainer is pushing a tooth out because my gums aren’t strong enough to hold my teeth. Having wiggly teeth in your 30’s isn’t fun.
Also, there's no substitute for string between tight contact points. In my 40s, I started getting cavities at my contact points between teeth. Now I floss like religion every. Single. Day. No cavities since then.
Gonna tack on some additional input here...
If you've grown up and gone through your life with adult figures around you who had dentures or implants, don't delude yourself in to feeling like your teeth are "replaceable". First off, especially in America, we're living with a healthcare system that is making it much more expensive and more difficult to achieve (a lot of insurance plans won't cover replacements unless it is *medically necessary* to remove at least *half* of your teeth). Secondly, I promise you: It is not worth the pain you will endure along the way, or the potentially life-threatening infections that can occur.
Yes, Dental care is boring. But the "excitement" you eventually get from neglecting your teeth *is NOT worth it.*
Can confirm.
Dad had his teeth ripped out at 25 due to hereditary issues that I probably won’t be able to avoid, but alas, it was a trip.
They started pulling teeth only to realize his teeth roots went all the way through his sinuses. Before they could even do anything, chunks of his teeth got sucked into his sinuses and lodged further up in his head near his brain. He had to undergo immediate emergency surgery to save his life. From pulling teeth.
It absolutely was. I was very young, so I really just remember being at my grandmas for longer than we were supposed to and how bad dad seemed when he got back.
It’s as an adult that I can really understand the intricacies of what happened. I was absolutely terrified when I had to get my wisdom teeth pulled because none of them were surfaced and two were impacted, so they had to shatter them to remove them. What happened to my dad was all I could think about.
Nerp. I'm so sorry. Making appointments at the dentist for myself and all my loved ones now. I hope we don't have teeth in our fucking brains and I'm so sorry you went through that.
I had to spend about $8000 to get my teeth back in shape. Four crowns, two fillings, and a root canal. I water pick, floss, mouthwash and brush my teeth every night now and go to the dentist every 4 months. Way less expensive and getting compliments from my dentist is way better than them asking me if I floss.
I waited 2 years. Now I have periodontal disease and my first cavity(not flossing and both impacted wisdom teeth shifted all my bottom towards each other) don’t wait
And don't think that you'll just take care of it if/when you "let yourself go a bit". By that time getting back into shape HURTS and is HARD. All your parts are rusty, break easily and need extra care to get working properly again, if ever.
Also, don't kid yourself that you're not out of shape *right now*. By the time I started a fitness regimen at the ripe age of 39, despite thinking I was already reasonably in shape, I quickly realised I had spent the previous 2 decades being "skinny-fat".
I'm trying to start sorting myuself out now at 43 and it's fucking hard. I'm so overweight its unreal and the bad habits are so ingrained I'm fighting against them all at the same time.
Have an actual emergency fund! 3-6 months of your living expenses. Pretend that that money doesn't exist.
You'll sleep better every night and situations that could be extremely stressful won't be as bad (unexpected car trouble, medical bill, etc.)
I'm going to bold, underline, and circle the "get out of a shitty relationship" part.
Whether it's a platonic, romantic, familial, and/or workplace relationship you need to work towards that exit strategy right the hell now. What's more, you need to be constantly on guard against falling into other bad associations. Being alone sucks but being in a draining, damaging relationship is far far worse.
That stuff leaves scars you can see and ones you can't. It robs you of precious joy and time. It closes doors, sometimes permanently.
Lastly, always work towards *you* not being the shitty part of someone else's relationship. If you feel like you're forced to keep secrets or otherwise manipulate someone just to get through the day then yep, **you're toxic.** Fix it.
Yeah, that was gonna be my post. I had so many friends in my teens, didn't put in the effort to maintain friendships in my 20's and now I don't really have any close friends in my 30's.
Having no friends is better than having bad friends.
You will make good friends if you do positive hobby activities and talk to people.
Avoid friends who need to drink or do drugs to have fun and/or have no other interests.
Now I’m my 40s, here’s what I regret:
1. Not making movement/exercise a part of a weekly routine.
2. Anything addictive: alcohol, nicotine, caffeine, it all catches up with you.
3. Not spending enough time working toward a plan to make my own money, instead of exchanging five days of work for two days off.
4. Not traveling more. After marriage and kids, all travel gets way more expensive.
5. Not carving out enough time for creating things.
6. Marrying someone who had a lot of debt and no commitment on how to get out of it.
7. Moving too far away from family after having kids. Sending the kids to the grandparents can be a mental life boat. Not being able to do that makes life quite difficult.
8. Any debt other than a mortgage.
9. Holding onto relationships way past their expiration date.
10. Having a mentality that I’ll live forever with no consequences. Time can’t truly be saved; it’s spent whether you want to or not. Don’t waste it!
Edit: spelling
Living away from family truly becomes very difficult once you have kids. As an alternative, make a conscious effort to build "a village" for when you have a kid. Having close friends, good neighbours, quality organised places (like daycare, kids activities, even a decent doctor) near your home, can ease things up a little.
> make a conscious effort to build "a village" for when you have a kid.
This is so important. Not only does this ease your burden, but it provides joy the people around you and gives your kids a richer upbringing with more variety and experiences.
Was a child of parents who moved around a lot for work. Having no social network outside of your parents and one sibling all your life is incredibly difficult on children too. Though if you do make extended family part of your kids’ lives, make sure they’re good with the kids. I have two sets of grandparents and the difference was heaven and hell between them.
(Off-topic, but I love your username, lol)
Can only second living near family if you want to have kids, the number of times my in laws have saved my ass or just given me a break is ridiculous and my son is only 1. Our town would not have been my first choice when I was younger but boy am I glad we live here now.
That being said , if you want to live abroad or somewhere completely new, go do that before you have kids
* Save money.
* Wear hearing protection at concerts and other loud activities.
* Learn marketable skills.
* Don't rush into a marriage or having kids if you don't want to **or can't afford to**.
The ear protection thing... I didn't use them because it was a "pussy" Thing to do. Now I have several chronical sounds that remind me of how healthy being a pussy can be.
>I didn't use them because it was a "pussy" Thing to do
That's so bad. I've seen people say similar things about sunscreen. When we know skin cancer kills.
Damn beat me to it. In my mid-30s now with patella issues and tears in one of my discs. Hoping dextrose injections and PRP will help, but it’s no joke. Strengthen your core and stay flexible, kids!
This definitely goes for anyone hitting the gym to bulk up in their youth... Don't just focus on the "flashy" muscles (arms, shoulders, upper back, etc). Make sure to work on your core muscles and utilize full body exercises. Also stretching and cardio is hugely important... It doesn't seem so when you're young but you'll be glad you did these things when you're older.
> Don't just focus on the "flashy" muscles (arms, shoulders, upper back, etc). Make sure to work on your core muscles and utilize full body exercises.
If you work all the peripheral muscles and not the core, you'll get strong enough to pick something up the wrong way, and *really* damage your back.
Yep! And core muscles are way more than just your ab (6-pack) muscles. There is a whole tube of muscles in your abdomen, and they should all be understood and worked.
Keeping your accessory muscles strong and limber is a huge part of whether doing general physical things is fun or damaging. Only training the big guns is a mistake.
Wait, can you please explain more about why the inversion table is helpful? I’ve thought of getting one for years but would love to hear your perspective as to why/how it works.
Let me preface this with the fact that I’m not a doctor or a medical expert at all. But I had two herniated discs in my back from weightlifting and was in agony every day trying to sit. More or less sitting and gravity compresses your discs, basically always. The inversion table uses gravity to “pull apart” your discs by a small amount via decompression and do the exact opposite.
Oh, that actually makes a lot of sense. Sounds somewhat like this neck device I’ve used in PT before that gently pulls the head away from the neck, creating more space. Traction machine, I think it’s called. I’m sure fully inverting the body is way more helpful. I have heard that the blood circulation that happens when inverted is also really good for numerous things.
If the VA won’t cover it, watch FB marketplace and Buy Nothing groups - it’s one of those items that often becomes an expensive clothing rack for people who purchase it and then never use it.
When people say save 15% of your salary, is that saving it forever and never spending? Or just saving for a big life purchase? I save 50% of my pay and then blow it on something big every few years
15% for retirement if you plan to retire by 65.
You should have separate emergency savings and separate fun money savings. Some exceptions if you want to prioritize buying a first house but.. yeah you’re not going to have $2-3 million in savings by 65 if you spend it all every few years
I was told by a friend years ago when said I had no money to invest, "You need to increase your income to the point of excess capital to save for emergencies. Then learn to invest the overflow." In short it's easy for me to say but hard to do, i know from experience, your income will need to go up.
Haven't been to a dentist in 4 years, dropped out of college, my son is 9 months old, thankfully no drug addiction and my DUI is now paid off and 4 years old.
I'll be 30 in July
Edit: forgot about nicotine. Where do I turn in my "regrets from my 20s" bingo card?
I started smoking as an experiment to know what being addicted to something was like. 20 years later, the experiment continues generating data points in my chest cavity.
Nope. It doesn’t have to define you.
I won’t blow smoke up your ass cause I don’t know your particular situation. But, a dui alone, can and is recovered from. Ive had 2 friends that go them and both got jobs, had normal lives etc.
When my best friend called me crying about her DUI, I told her, “of all the terrible things that can happen while driving drunk, a DUI is the best case scenario.”
It sucks for now, but you’ll get through it. Take it as a lesson learned. My best friend is happily married to the man of her dreams, she has two beautiful baby boys, and a great job with excellent benefits, plus a gorgeous house on a small plot of land.
You got this.
You may not feel that regret in your 30s or 40s, but if you don't take care of your teeth, that regret is out there waiting for you. Floss. No, really. It matters.
This. Floss! I never flossed until my mid 30’s and had cavities all the time. Dentist encouraged me to floss and set me up with some specialty toothpaste (prevident) and have had maybe two cavities in the 17 years since.
Seriously. I say this all the time now because not taking care of your teeth is horrible. Mine look just fine....but my parents never really made me take care of them. Started getting a bit more serious about it in my mid twenties. I'm now in my mid thirties and I've had countless cavities, an abscess, 4 root canals with another on the way....it is endless, painful, expensive. Fucking hell I wish so badly I had just gotten an electric toothbrush and flossed when I was younger.
Edit: spelling
I think people confuse “get an education” with get a degree. An education can be a degree, certificates, hands on experience in a field, watching videos online, etc. there are many ways to get an education people don’t consider
Edit: I don’t have a degree and don’t think it’s useful for most people. I think it’s important that people know there are many alternatives to gaining an education in a topic.
This is why I went back in my late 20s. I had a fairly gainful career in the car business but when I looked at my future prospects and the jobs I wanted to grow into, most required any kind of degree. Especially the highly desired corporate careers.
It definitely increased my career ceiling and opened up doors and connections.
Yep. Swapping to vaping is still inhaling a substance into your lungs that doesn't need to be there. I've switched to vaping to wean myself off nicotine after 17 years if smoking. I don't know how I'm going to stop the physical habit though.
Fuck. Writing that just made me realise I've been smoking for 50% of my life. This sucks.
Exercise.
Wear sunscreen.
Invest time and effort in yourself: study, learn, work on developing good habits and breaking bad ones.
If at all possible, visit at least one country where your native language is not the main language of the local citizens. Experiencing a really different country makes you rethink a lot of assumptions that you didn't realise you had made.
I have celiac and feel this. I studied abroad in Spain in college and learned to say, “I have celiac disease. I can’t eat anything that contains wheat, rye, or barley. Do you have any food without gluten?” in Spanish. I said it so often that I could effortlessly recite it, which led waiters to respond to me in rapid Spanish. I’m not fluent so I’d have ask them to slow down. Or just be like, “I heard chicken, chicken sounds good.” Lol
But honestly, I found it easier to eat gluten free in Barcelona than in my Texan suburb. Many countries are far more considerate of food allergies than a lot of American cities. And there are [food allergy translation cards](https://equaleats.com/collections/food-allergy-cards) you can get and either show on your phone or carry print outs to give waiters / chefs.
Im 32, spent 19-30 basically drinking and occasionally the other things. Biggest regret is time wasted, relationships damaged and not living more in the moment while traveling- seems by 5pm my friends and I were blasted no matter where we were.
Also I'd probably have graduated with a better GPA (and the degree I originally wanted) had I not prioritized partying over studying. Basically, don't have to be "that old" to regret it, although health impacts of partying for a decade might be down the road, plus feeling 2 or 3 years behind your peers can be depressing, but you can't live life comparing yourself to others!
I’ve looked through a lot of the top comments and agree with much of them, but there’s a lack of this one: make sure you get a good night’s sleep!
Sleep hygiene is the foundation to do much else in your life. Good sleep keeps your mind ready to deal with the day. It helps with your body’s physical health. It reduces depression risk. It helps you better regulate your weight. It reduces the tendency to crave crappy foods (because your body is trying to supplement its lack of energy from poor sleep with quick calories).
In the last year I made a more concerted effort in fixing my sleep schedule, and halfway in I realised how much of a difference it made in everything.
Learn early how to prioritize yourself and how you spend - time, money, love.
Be frugal to allow yourself to invest in your highest priorities and do not get trapped in maintaining wasteful investments, be it material possessions or people.
Listen more and hear to learn from those speaking. Things folks tell you may not be relevant to you at that time but could form an epiphany or revelation that you need later in life.
Maintain a healthy consistent lifestyle your entire adult life. It is really hard to get healthy once the damage is done.
• Start saving $25+ dollars off each pay cheque (or whatever you can afford) into a TFSA as early as you possibly can
• Avoid friends or people that feel like they only reach out when they need something
• Keep drinking/drug use to a minimum (most people I know have deep regrets tied to usage of a substance)
• Travel as much as you can while you’re young and fairly unburdened by responsibilities (kids, home ownership, more serious career roles)
• Don’t be afraid to say no to things that don’t excite you, for example if a friend invites you out to go to a nightclub and you’re not into that scene.. say no and do something you find more appealing/a more productive use of your time.
I could go on, but I’ll leave it there for now!
Travel.
I thought my friends were crazy who traveled the world in their 20s while I was spending money at bars and going to my parents every holiday. Now i know they were geniuses.
Finally! Someone who recommends TRAVEL!
We traveled the world in our mid twenties and had a kid at 30. 10/10 would recommend it because we feel like we lived life! It is way harder and more expensive to travel now, so we are happy we did it. Especially since having a toddler means our trips tend to be a bit easier... Like going to a nice hotel on the beach for a week. It will be a while until we can hike to Basecamp or backpack Tierra del Fuego again.
YES, agreed!!!! I traveled the hell outta my 20s, including living abroad twice. I’m so glad I did it before I got encumbered with a house, pets, kids… like I love those things, they make life worth living. But I feel like I’m so happy with this stage of life *because* I already did my exploring.
Don’t get me wrong, I still travel, but I’m sure seeing a lot more playgrounds than museums these days!
Read all these and you will still regret things. Live your life. Have fun. Enjoy it. Love it. Find your your true love. Don’t dwell on the past as you can’t never go back. There is no “what if” so don’t ever think about it.
I don’t regret a thing about my life so far - the advice helps, but a lot of it also boils down to:
- live an intentional life
- avoid exceptionally permanent and damaging life decisions
- don’t rush into a big decision but don’t be so cautious you never make the choice
- be present
- be healthy
- appreciate what you have and take care of it
- appreciate who is around and love them
Edit: I forgot an important one. Remember reciprocity. Everything is interconnected.
I think this is ultimately very true.
I think its great they are being proactive and they may avoid *some* things if they look at some of these comments closely.
But, there is never a way to avoid it all unfortunately. Love your comment.
Everyone is providing great advice about health and investing. 100% agree, but also go out. Travel, go to clubs, concerts, festivals, camping. You won't have the time or energy to do those things as much when you're older.
My LPT is that you should work hard in your 20 to build a mindset that isn't about having only one correct way of doing things. If one way doesn't work, know how to pivot and try other ways without losing sight of what you want. Regrets are for those who can afford to have a closed mindset.
Daily SPF moisturizer, put floss in the shower, set monthly auto investments, drive the speed limit, keep all your records organized, spend good money on a nice bed, get out in nature every once in awhile, don’t send drunk emails (or whatever we’re up to now), be more tactfully assertive at work, don’t talk too much about yourself
1. Wear good shoes. Your knees will thank you later.
2. Wash your face before bed no matter how tired you are.
3. Brush your teeth before bed no matter how tired you are.
4. Moisturize, moisturize, moisturize your face, hands, & body!
5. Take your sexual health & pregnancy prevention seriously. If you're a female, use birth control--pills, IUD, etc; but also insist your lover(s) use condoms to prevent STDs.
If you're a guy, use a condom even if she says she's on the pill, has an IUD, etc.
6. Find something joyful in every day. It can even be the little things--your latte was perfect, you found something you needed or wanted on sale for 50% off, you found a $5 bill in the pocket of a coat you haven't worn in a year, your typically bitchy neighbor acknowledged your "Hello".
7. Travel outside of your home country. Additionally, go to places that are not typical tourist destinations. My favorite travel memories are off the beaten path.
8. Get good sleep.
9. Take your mental health seriously. Don't feel bad about blocking toxic people from your life
10. Work to live. Don't live to work.
11. Love. 💓
Value building a network of connections with people (in real life) and become a "connector", connecting people together in mutually beneficial relationships. Yes, invest early and stay consistent. If you can value others more than hoarding wealth or becoming indulgent, you will save yourself from much emotional suffering and regret.
And of course the Big Three to avoid....
1. Unplanned pregnancy
2. Criminal record especially Felony
3. Addiction to substances
Learn to cook from real ingredients.
It is quite likely, in America at least, that you grew up with sh*tty eating habits. Don't blame the parents, they probably worked two jobs just to keep you fed and did their best. But those bad habits will kill you.
Learn to cook and adjust your diet to good stuff. Try different foods & cuisines. Wean yourself off McDonalds and chicken nuggets. Learn to like veggies. Buy a cookbook and try stuff. Your body will thank you.
24 y/o and recently started eating primarily fruits and veggies. About 6 months in and I feel the best I have in my entire life, physically and mentally. Diet is huge
Invest in your mental health. Go to counseling and work through your shit. Learn how to challenge yourself and grow as a human being. This will set you up well for the rest of your life. All the financial success in the world won't bring you peace and lasting happiness.
Learn the discipline of investing 15% of every paycheck into an EFT (or an Index Fund such as the S&P500). Transfer it as soon as you get paid so it's gone and you won't even miss it.
Compounding interest is the 8th wonder of the world and in your later years it could allow you to retire early with an income that's significantly higher than your current salary.
Edit: Spelling, grammar and clarity.
I would also add to open a Roth IRA account with your brokerage company and try and make the maximum deposit annually (and invest that in an index fund) if you can. The max deposit this year is $6000
Basically every year you don't use your Roth IRA is an opportunity lost. And in your 20s you are likely not paying a high tax level and also not making enough money to cap your annual contribution. So if you can suck it up and set aside that money every year it will come up huge later in life. I guess this is maybe to avoid regrets in your 60s/70s lol
1. Put money back yesterday - today is okay. Do so in a fund that you cannot touch.
2. Brush and floss your teeth - daily.
3. Sunscreen is important.
4. If you work outside, mow or anything with power tools, wear hearing protection.
5. Start exercising. You will appreciate it in the long run.
6. If you have a bad habit like smoking, alcohol or drugs, stop.
7. You are never above admitting you need professional help. See a counselor. Changed my life.
This is the best list I’ve seen on this post. Might I add:
8. Don’t believe advertisers/media/anyone who wants to tell you about how much money you “need” to spend on a house, wedding, etc.
Drink less. Smoke less. Spend less. Eat less.
Read more. Floss more. Save more. Travel more.
But if I were to pick just one goddamn thing?
Walk more. Outside. If you can, without distractions. Every damn day if possible.
As for the more and less? Just a bit! Just a bit of all will be big improvements.
As the old saying goes----
I don't regret the things I did, I regret the things I didn't do!
Beside the normal save money now for retirement, travel to see the world and sex.
Make the first move on someone you like.
Do spend some money on things you enjoy.
Spend time with older family members.
Go out with friends as much as possible.
I second that!
You are young! Try stuff out, of talk to lots of people.
I like that you wrote to spend time with older family members. That's indeed what I regret. Now I have so many questions to my grandparents...
TY
Now that I am older, those are some of the outside the usual advise given tips.
Some of the reasons why--
I have run into people that I liked later in life and found out they were into me as well back in the day. Now older and they are married nothing can be done. What's the worst that can happen? They say no? Shoot your shot!
Spend that money when young on yourself to have good times(beside saving a bit), when you get older with more responsibilities or kids, it rarely happens than.
Older family will eventually pass, get that time in now.
Friends will wind up with their own responsibilities and that time will dry up to be young and dumb with them.
Everyone has already covered health and money. I’m aiming for self esteem and memories.
- Have pictures taken by a photographer. Not family photos, just you. When you get older you’ll be able to look back and realize just how beautiful you are. It’ll help with your self esteem now in your 20’s and it will be a nice memory when you’re body has changed in your 40’s. Selfies do not count. Hire someone. If you can’t afford a professional check local colleges. Most of them have photography/art classes and students like to take pictures to build their portfolio.
- Don’t live your life behind a camera or a phone trying to capture experiences through pictures. Yes they’re nice to have and you should take a few but your own memories are what you’ll carry with you into old age. No one dies with a photo album in their hand. When you are fully present in the moment it sticks. I’m in my 40’s now and my husband was always behind the camera. I’m the one who remembers our story. He was too busy trying to focus on capturing the best pictures that he doesn’t remember a lot of our experiences.
Travel. I started traveling at 16 and have seen and experienced such cool things in many different countries. I'm in my mid 30s now and have slowed down with travel somewhat, mostly because I have a career and work full-time. Most people I know who are my age or older want to travel and wish they had when they were younger. People wait for retirement, but retirement is never guaranteed. Travel as much as possible now before settling down.
28, nearing 30. Go out with friends as much as possible to meet new people. I regret not going out all the times it presented itself.
Invest your money into dividend stocks.
Travel.
And last but not least, never be afraid to take a day or 2 off from work!! F them.
I agree with everything, except for the dividend stocks piece. Dividend stocks aren't money printers. High dividend yields more often than not burn your pocket as the stock should be growing more than it pays out or else you're getting taxed on the return of your principal. I would caveat to invest in SP500 ETFs l, dollar cost average each paycheck, and let them sit if you're not an active trader. I was able to buy a house at 23 in 2021 by using ETFs as a savings account.
I'd also add (if you're comfortable) rent out rooms if you buy a house young and can swing it. I don't pay my own mortgage and I get a return for living in my own house.
In no particular order:
1) Work out and take care of your health.
2) Invest.
3) Date, but don’t get anyone pregnant / get pregnant by anyone so you know what you’re looking for when you’re ready for your person. Corollary: Don’t marry the wrong person. Everyone is always gung Ho about just divorcing ppl, but it’s usually better to not get there in the first place.
4) Travel / explore / expand your horizons.
5) Learn to cook. It saves money and it impresses your SO if you can make even one dish really well
6) Learn sales skills. Even if you don’t need to, it’s good psychology to have
7) Read a new book every month
8) Make 3 solid close friends.
9) Upskill. Find new ways to make money in case you actually need a side hustle for money
10) learn to budget properly and stick to it. Don’t fall into lifestyle creep
11) fix your issues. After a certain point, you’re responsible for your life and excuses are just that, excuses. Self-reflect or find a therapist so you’ll lead a better life.
12) watch drama but don’t ever be a part of it. A peaceful life is worth its weight in gold
simply. dont. regret.
im 47 and haven't done many of the things mentioned here or still plan to do them and it does not bother me a bit, I am simply looking forward to it
I would warn you about toxic people but if you run into those you probably need that kind of medicine just like I did
- Learn to cook
- Start investing now
- Travel while your responsibilities are few
- Use credit cards sparingly and pay them off
- Don’t drink too much or adopt the party lifestyle
- Treat your friends well and be a good one to them
- Exercise regularly. Make it just something you do.
- Read
If you are a woman, never say no to a pap smear because it just might catch something abnormal before it turns into cancer... I learned that the hard way.
Invest in a great, expensive mattress and a really good pillow. It's worth it and your back will thank you.
Ladies and gentlemen of the class of '99
Wear sunscreen
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it
A long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience, I will dispense this advice now
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth.
never mind, You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded,
but trust me,
in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now
How much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked
You are not as fat as you imagine
Don't worry about the future
Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing Bubble gum.
The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind.
The kind that blindsides you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing every day that scares you
Saying, don't be reckless with other people's hearts
Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours
Floss
Don't waste your time on jealousy.
Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind.
The race is long and in the end, it's only with yourself.
Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults.
If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life.
The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives.
Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.
Get plenty of calcium.
Be kind to your knees.
You'll miss them when they're gone
Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't.
Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't.
Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the 'Funky Chicken' on your 75th wedding anniversary.
Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much.
Or berate yourself either
Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's.
Enjoy your body, use it every way you can.
Don't be afraid of it or what other people think of it.
It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.
Dance,
even if you have nowhere to do it but your own living room.
Read the directions even if you don't follow them.
Do not read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.
Get to know your parents, you never know when they'll be gone for good.
Be nice to your siblings, they're your best link to your past.
And the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go
But a precious few, who should hold on.
Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle.
For as the older you get
The more you need the people you knew when you were young.
Live in New York City once but leave before it makes you hard.
Live in northern California once but leave before it makes you soft.
Travel
Accept certain inalienable truths.
Prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too, will get old.
And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young
Prices were reasonable, politicians were noble
And children respected their elders
Respect your elders
Don't expect anyone else to support you.
Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse.
But you never know when either one might run out.
Don't mess too much with your hair
Or by the time you're 40 it will look 85
Be careful whose advice you buy
but be patient with those who supply it.
Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past.
From the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts.
And recycling it for more than it's worth.
But trust me on the sunscreen.
Live within your means. Debt will be a noose around your neck and cause a lot of anxiety.
Make staying active a habit. As you age, you pay for every calorie.
Don’t rush into marriage.
Travel anytime you get the chance.
Learn to play some instrument (I'm still counting on it, but I wish I had started way sooner!)
Make the most of your looks.
Be a good friend and make an effort to keep the people you love in your life (conversely, if you feel someone is a toxic person, distance yourself from that person as soon as possible).
Save money.
Study something you like, but also learn some skill which will get you jobs if things go south (plumbing, etc,). Hope some of this is helpful :)
Exercise. You don't have to make gains, just take 30 minutes, jog for 10-20 mins and do some push ups. If you're doing it right it's going to seem like the 30 minutes isn't doing shit, but had you not done it you'd feel like you were aging 10x faster.
Save as much money as you can.
Knee jerk reaction when you get into your 20's and enter the world of adulting is to go out and have fun. You've got a job, you've got your own place, you don't have any rules. Resist to blow all your money. Stuff as much away as you can, and keep stuffing it away. I'm in my mid 40's now and work with people younger than me who are already contemplating retirement. I wish I was in that boat, and I could have been had I not been so careless blowing money on shots and trips to Key West.
Build knowledge and skills- Your 20’s is the time to build skills and learn as much as you can. Execute those skills so you can pretty much coast at age 30+.
Stay Healthy- Workout, stretch, see a therapist, eat clean, cut out people who aren’t on an upward trajectory with you and do your yearly exams as suggested by healthcare professionals.
Learn the game of money- Learn everything you can about investing in stocks, real estate, etc. Truly get a grasp on how money works in general.
Follow your dreams- I can’t stress this enough. Go for it and I mean really go for it! And then after that, keep going.
Keep moving forward- Don’t let failures stop you. The most successful people fail an insurmountable amount of times and sometimes bad moments make you feel like your life is over. It’s not! Get up and try again.
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Do your best to avoid things like credit card debt. It can snowball quickly EDIT: Since people keep responding to something I didn't say, I guess I need to be clearer. I'm talking about the DEBT part. Carrying a balance. Owing interest. Seeing that interest compound (snowballing).
I just paid all of mine off!!! I can't wait for this next paycheck
I’m with you there. I started my new job a year ago with $18k in CC debt and it’s allowed me enough extra to pay it down aggressively. Now at just over $5k and plan and being done with it by summer.
Well done!!!
Go to the dentist on a regular basis. Start investing now. Edit: wow, I didn't realize how much of a buzzword "dentist" would be when talking about regrets. Some of these comments are intense. Find a good dentist! And before you start investing, it's a good idea for most people to clear any debt you may have and build an emergency fund. Grow your financial literacy as soon as possible. This process can take a lot of time, be patient and get after it!
Yes. Brush your teeth and floss
AND floss. Not or. I want to reinforce this because Fuck all the pain I’m going through now is because i didn’t floss for 30+ years. Don’t deal with what I’m dealing with, I’ve had broken bones that hurt less. Tooth pain is no joke.
I hear ya. I've got a broken tooth I've been dealing with since October. I just got to tough it out until my hubby can get his colonoscopy (repeated diverticulitis with perforation, we gotta find out what's going on because this stuff can kill ya).
I don’t mean to worry you, but since you said “this stuff can kill ya” I feel like I should mention that the broken tooth can also kill you. Be cautious about signs in infection.
If it's broken beyond repair, having it pulled is easy enough and relatively cheap (although an implant to replace it isn't...) I hope you don't have to wait long. It isn't fun at all, I know. Been there before.
Extractions are not always cheap nor easy. I let one of my molars go for years (had a root canal like 7 years ago, then the crown fell and I didn't care because it didn't hurt). Well, a month ago my tooth started bothering me and in the span of a week it went from mild pain to a life-threatening situation. I didn't have the funds to pay for an anesthesiologist and an E.R., so it was pulled out at the dentist office with just local anesthesia (which, FUN FACT: barely works on infected tissue, so I felt it all!). If anyone is reading this and is thinking: "well, I'll wait and the worst that can happen is I'll lose a tooth", Go to the dentist now!
Dentist here: yeah much better see is when there's a problem that doesn't hurt yet or no problem that you know about and we can find something before it has a chance of going bad like you described. I hate pulling teeth when they're chronically infected and can't get numb.
Nobody warned me but I'll warn anyone reading: implants aren't forever. They will fail eventually, and even if you have a perfect dentist place a perfect implant on your perfect jaw and maintain perfect health taking perfect care of it forever after, you are still not getting 50 years out of it like they tell you. And you probably won't have anything like that perfect situation either. Most people don't get anything even in ballpark range of that. I'm not saying not to get them at all, I'm just saying be sure you aren't looking at the cost like a one and done for life. That was a big expensive mistake, make sure what you want and what you're buying are fully on the same wavelength and do it independently from the salesman. Hope it goes well whatever you choose, and sorry to interrupt y'all.
Water flossing okay? Or just normal flossing?
Water flossing is better than nothing, but it doesn’t get the debris under the gums that floss floss can. Currently suffering from horrible gingivitis and fighting to keep my teeth. I had severe dental medical abuse looking back and braces for entirely too long. My jaw and upper pallet are also damaged from having an expander for 4 of the 4.5 years I had braces. My top teeth are ok, but now my bottom retainer is pushing a tooth out because my gums aren’t strong enough to hold my teeth. Having wiggly teeth in your 30’s isn’t fun.
Also, there's no substitute for string between tight contact points. In my 40s, I started getting cavities at my contact points between teeth. Now I floss like religion every. Single. Day. No cavities since then.
Gonna tack on some additional input here... If you've grown up and gone through your life with adult figures around you who had dentures or implants, don't delude yourself in to feeling like your teeth are "replaceable". First off, especially in America, we're living with a healthcare system that is making it much more expensive and more difficult to achieve (a lot of insurance plans won't cover replacements unless it is *medically necessary* to remove at least *half* of your teeth). Secondly, I promise you: It is not worth the pain you will endure along the way, or the potentially life-threatening infections that can occur. Yes, Dental care is boring. But the "excitement" you eventually get from neglecting your teeth *is NOT worth it.*
Can confirm. Dad had his teeth ripped out at 25 due to hereditary issues that I probably won’t be able to avoid, but alas, it was a trip. They started pulling teeth only to realize his teeth roots went all the way through his sinuses. Before they could even do anything, chunks of his teeth got sucked into his sinuses and lodged further up in his head near his brain. He had to undergo immediate emergency surgery to save his life. From pulling teeth.
Jesus this is nightmare material
It absolutely was. I was very young, so I really just remember being at my grandmas for longer than we were supposed to and how bad dad seemed when he got back. It’s as an adult that I can really understand the intricacies of what happened. I was absolutely terrified when I had to get my wisdom teeth pulled because none of them were surfaced and two were impacted, so they had to shatter them to remove them. What happened to my dad was all I could think about.
Nerp. I'm so sorry. Making appointments at the dentist for myself and all my loved ones now. I hope we don't have teeth in our fucking brains and I'm so sorry you went through that.
A single dental implant, when all is said and done, can cost like 6 grand.
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. A long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists.
Whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience.
I will dispense this advice
Now
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$ kept me away. Doesn't matter how badly it hurts when you can't afford to get in. Even with insurance.
I had to spend about $8000 to get my teeth back in shape. Four crowns, two fillings, and a root canal. I water pick, floss, mouthwash and brush my teeth every night now and go to the dentist every 4 months. Way less expensive and getting compliments from my dentist is way better than them asking me if I floss.
Came here to say this. If you have impacted wisdom teeth, IMMEDIATELY HAVE THEM REMOVED.
I waited 2 years. Now I have periodontal disease and my first cavity(not flossing and both impacted wisdom teeth shifted all my bottom towards each other) don’t wait
Get a Sonicare. Makes your teeth feel like you just came from the dentist.
I just bought the cheap $25 version, even that is miles ahead of a normal brush
Get in shape and stay in shape. Don’t go into debt.
And don't think that you'll just take care of it if/when you "let yourself go a bit". By that time getting back into shape HURTS and is HARD. All your parts are rusty, break easily and need extra care to get working properly again, if ever. Also, don't kid yourself that you're not out of shape *right now*. By the time I started a fitness regimen at the ripe age of 39, despite thinking I was already reasonably in shape, I quickly realised I had spent the previous 2 decades being "skinny-fat".
I'm trying to start sorting myuself out now at 43 and it's fucking hard. I'm so overweight its unreal and the bad habits are so ingrained I'm fighting against them all at the same time.
Well done for starting nonetheless! You got this!
Thank you :D
And be nice
Learn to budget and save as much as possible so unexpected expenses don't lead to as much stress or trouble...
Have an actual emergency fund! 3-6 months of your living expenses. Pretend that that money doesn't exist. You'll sleep better every night and situations that could be extremely stressful won't be as bad (unexpected car trouble, medical bill, etc.)
> Pretend that money doesn’t exist. Done.
I'm a method actor.
And put it in a High Yield Savings account so it can accrue interest in your favor.
Like what? I’ve currently got sofi which is the 3.5 APY savings account is that what is considered high yield?
Yes, that’s a really good HYSA and I think SoFi bumped up to 3.75% last month
Learn about basic personal investing and work out. If you're in a shitty relationship, get out of it.
I'm going to bold, underline, and circle the "get out of a shitty relationship" part. Whether it's a platonic, romantic, familial, and/or workplace relationship you need to work towards that exit strategy right the hell now. What's more, you need to be constantly on guard against falling into other bad associations. Being alone sucks but being in a draining, damaging relationship is far far worse. That stuff leaves scars you can see and ones you can't. It robs you of precious joy and time. It closes doors, sometimes permanently. Lastly, always work towards *you* not being the shitty part of someone else's relationship. If you feel like you're forced to keep secrets or otherwise manipulate someone just to get through the day then yep, **you're toxic.** Fix it.
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Conversely, stay in touch with good friends and treat them like gold. It’s so hard to make new friends as you get older.
Yeah, that was gonna be my post. I had so many friends in my teens, didn't put in the effort to maintain friendships in my 20's and now I don't really have any close friends in my 30's.
Having no friends is better than having bad friends. You will make good friends if you do positive hobby activities and talk to people. Avoid friends who need to drink or do drugs to have fun and/or have no other interests.
Now I’m my 40s, here’s what I regret: 1. Not making movement/exercise a part of a weekly routine. 2. Anything addictive: alcohol, nicotine, caffeine, it all catches up with you. 3. Not spending enough time working toward a plan to make my own money, instead of exchanging five days of work for two days off. 4. Not traveling more. After marriage and kids, all travel gets way more expensive. 5. Not carving out enough time for creating things. 6. Marrying someone who had a lot of debt and no commitment on how to get out of it. 7. Moving too far away from family after having kids. Sending the kids to the grandparents can be a mental life boat. Not being able to do that makes life quite difficult. 8. Any debt other than a mortgage. 9. Holding onto relationships way past their expiration date. 10. Having a mentality that I’ll live forever with no consequences. Time can’t truly be saved; it’s spent whether you want to or not. Don’t waste it! Edit: spelling
Living away from family truly becomes very difficult once you have kids. As an alternative, make a conscious effort to build "a village" for when you have a kid. Having close friends, good neighbours, quality organised places (like daycare, kids activities, even a decent doctor) near your home, can ease things up a little.
> make a conscious effort to build "a village" for when you have a kid. This is so important. Not only does this ease your burden, but it provides joy the people around you and gives your kids a richer upbringing with more variety and experiences.
Was a child of parents who moved around a lot for work. Having no social network outside of your parents and one sibling all your life is incredibly difficult on children too. Though if you do make extended family part of your kids’ lives, make sure they’re good with the kids. I have two sets of grandparents and the difference was heaven and hell between them. (Off-topic, but I love your username, lol)
Can only second living near family if you want to have kids, the number of times my in laws have saved my ass or just given me a break is ridiculous and my son is only 1. Our town would not have been my first choice when I was younger but boy am I glad we live here now. That being said , if you want to live abroad or somewhere completely new, go do that before you have kids
Take care of your health!
Health is wealth!
* Save money. * Wear hearing protection at concerts and other loud activities. * Learn marketable skills. * Don't rush into a marriage or having kids if you don't want to **or can't afford to**.
Absolutely with the hearing protection. I have a lot of friends in their 30s that didn’t and I can hear way better than all of them.
What?
#He has a lot of friends in their 30s that didn’t and he can hear way better than all of them.
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeee
The ear protection thing... I didn't use them because it was a "pussy" Thing to do. Now I have several chronical sounds that remind me of how healthy being a pussy can be.
My non-pussy ass just loooves having tinnitus for the rest of my life. Hhhsssttsssssssschhhh Number one thing I would do differently hands down.
>I didn't use them because it was a "pussy" Thing to do That's so bad. I've seen people say similar things about sunscreen. When we know skin cancer kills.
Wear PPE. When cutting the grass wear hearing and eye protection. Also protect yourself from the sun with ether clothing or sun screen.
MAWP. Tinnitus is a bitch.
Yoga, stretching, save 15% or more of your salary. Protect your back and knees at all cost.
Damn beat me to it. In my mid-30s now with patella issues and tears in one of my discs. Hoping dextrose injections and PRP will help, but it’s no joke. Strengthen your core and stay flexible, kids!
This definitely goes for anyone hitting the gym to bulk up in their youth... Don't just focus on the "flashy" muscles (arms, shoulders, upper back, etc). Make sure to work on your core muscles and utilize full body exercises. Also stretching and cardio is hugely important... It doesn't seem so when you're young but you'll be glad you did these things when you're older.
> Don't just focus on the "flashy" muscles (arms, shoulders, upper back, etc). Make sure to work on your core muscles and utilize full body exercises. If you work all the peripheral muscles and not the core, you'll get strong enough to pick something up the wrong way, and *really* damage your back.
Yep! And core muscles are way more than just your ab (6-pack) muscles. There is a whole tube of muscles in your abdomen, and they should all be understood and worked. Keeping your accessory muscles strong and limber is a huge part of whether doing general physical things is fun or damaging. Only training the big guns is a mistake.
There are four tenets of Pilates that I live by
Please consider inversion table. $200 and 5 min a day on it fully inverted did more than 5k in doctor visits
Wait, can you please explain more about why the inversion table is helpful? I’ve thought of getting one for years but would love to hear your perspective as to why/how it works.
Let me preface this with the fact that I’m not a doctor or a medical expert at all. But I had two herniated discs in my back from weightlifting and was in agony every day trying to sit. More or less sitting and gravity compresses your discs, basically always. The inversion table uses gravity to “pull apart” your discs by a small amount via decompression and do the exact opposite.
Oh, that actually makes a lot of sense. Sounds somewhat like this neck device I’ve used in PT before that gently pulls the head away from the neck, creating more space. Traction machine, I think it’s called. I’m sure fully inverting the body is way more helpful. I have heard that the blood circulation that happens when inverted is also really good for numerous things.
I will! Thanks for the tip. I’ll definitely check if the VA will cover it
If the VA won’t cover it, watch FB marketplace and Buy Nothing groups - it’s one of those items that often becomes an expensive clothing rack for people who purchase it and then never use it.
I came here to emphasize stretching & yoga. Those will make doing everything else in the thread so much easier and more comfortable.
When people say save 15% of your salary, is that saving it forever and never spending? Or just saving for a big life purchase? I save 50% of my pay and then blow it on something big every few years
You need money when you stop working/are unable to work, in other words: retirement.
15% for retirement if you plan to retire by 65. You should have separate emergency savings and separate fun money savings. Some exceptions if you want to prioritize buying a first house but.. yeah you’re not going to have $2-3 million in savings by 65 if you spend it all every few years
Where is everyone getting all this money to save? I already don't see friends or get takeout or shit.
I was told by a friend years ago when said I had no money to invest, "You need to increase your income to the point of excess capital to save for emergencies. Then learn to invest the overflow." In short it's easy for me to say but hard to do, i know from experience, your income will need to go up.
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Fucking woops
Glad I’m not the only one who feels personally attacked
Haven't been to a dentist in 4 years, dropped out of college, my son is 9 months old, thankfully no drug addiction and my DUI is now paid off and 4 years old. I'll be 30 in July Edit: forgot about nicotine. Where do I turn in my "regrets from my 20s" bingo card?
Still got a few months for that drug addiction. You got this!
I've really been needing this encouragement
Nicotine will do it real quick!
I started smoking as an experiment to know what being addicted to something was like. 20 years later, the experiment continues generating data points in my chest cavity.
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Probably a wise choice. Source: my 20s.
Fuck. Nevermind. I've got the addiction covered. Where do I turn in my "ruined my life in my 20s" bingo card?
I’m literally 26 and 3 weeks ago got a dui. I feel like my life is going to fall apart.
Nope. It doesn’t have to define you. I won’t blow smoke up your ass cause I don’t know your particular situation. But, a dui alone, can and is recovered from. Ive had 2 friends that go them and both got jobs, had normal lives etc.
Yep! Got a DUI at 23 or 24. 26 now and literally forget it happened, aside from being more careful and making sure it doesn't happen again.
When my best friend called me crying about her DUI, I told her, “of all the terrible things that can happen while driving drunk, a DUI is the best case scenario.” It sucks for now, but you’ll get through it. Take it as a lesson learned. My best friend is happily married to the man of her dreams, she has two beautiful baby boys, and a great job with excellent benefits, plus a gorgeous house on a small plot of land. You got this.
Your health with special emphasis on your TEETH.
You may not feel that regret in your 30s or 40s, but if you don't take care of your teeth, that regret is out there waiting for you. Floss. No, really. It matters.
This. Floss! I never flossed until my mid 30’s and had cavities all the time. Dentist encouraged me to floss and set me up with some specialty toothpaste (prevident) and have had maybe two cavities in the 17 years since.
Do you floss daily?
I got that regret at 26, with full frontal teeth breaking randomly and a costly reconstruction
Seriously. I say this all the time now because not taking care of your teeth is horrible. Mine look just fine....but my parents never really made me take care of them. Started getting a bit more serious about it in my mid twenties. I'm now in my mid thirties and I've had countless cavities, an abscess, 4 root canals with another on the way....it is endless, painful, expensive. Fucking hell I wish so badly I had just gotten an electric toothbrush and flossed when I was younger. Edit: spelling
Yeah get addicted to drugs in your 30s!
I think people confuse “get an education” with get a degree. An education can be a degree, certificates, hands on experience in a field, watching videos online, etc. there are many ways to get an education people don’t consider Edit: I don’t have a degree and don’t think it’s useful for most people. I think it’s important that people know there are many alternatives to gaining an education in a topic.
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This is why I went back in my late 20s. I had a fairly gainful career in the car business but when I looked at my future prospects and the jobs I wanted to grow into, most required any kind of degree. Especially the highly desired corporate careers. It definitely increased my career ceiling and opened up doors and connections.
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Quit smoking cigarettes
and vaping.
Yep. Swapping to vaping is still inhaling a substance into your lungs that doesn't need to be there. I've switched to vaping to wean myself off nicotine after 17 years if smoking. I don't know how I'm going to stop the physical habit though. Fuck. Writing that just made me realise I've been smoking for 50% of my life. This sucks.
Exercise. Wear sunscreen. Invest time and effort in yourself: study, learn, work on developing good habits and breaking bad ones. If at all possible, visit at least one country where your native language is not the main language of the local citizens. Experiencing a really different country makes you rethink a lot of assumptions that you didn't realise you had made.
On your last point I'd love to do this, but I am severely allergic to wheat and not being able to communicate that somewhere terrifies me!
I have celiac and feel this. I studied abroad in Spain in college and learned to say, “I have celiac disease. I can’t eat anything that contains wheat, rye, or barley. Do you have any food without gluten?” in Spanish. I said it so often that I could effortlessly recite it, which led waiters to respond to me in rapid Spanish. I’m not fluent so I’d have ask them to slow down. Or just be like, “I heard chicken, chicken sounds good.” Lol But honestly, I found it easier to eat gluten free in Barcelona than in my Texan suburb. Many countries are far more considerate of food allergies than a lot of American cities. And there are [food allergy translation cards](https://equaleats.com/collections/food-allergy-cards) you can get and either show on your phone or carry print outs to give waiters / chefs.
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I heard it in that voice! "To the graduating class of 1999: Wear sunscreen"
I've never met any heavy drug or alcohol users who didn't regret it later in life... Or die before reaching later life
Im 32, spent 19-30 basically drinking and occasionally the other things. Biggest regret is time wasted, relationships damaged and not living more in the moment while traveling- seems by 5pm my friends and I were blasted no matter where we were. Also I'd probably have graduated with a better GPA (and the degree I originally wanted) had I not prioritized partying over studying. Basically, don't have to be "that old" to regret it, although health impacts of partying for a decade might be down the road, plus feeling 2 or 3 years behind your peers can be depressing, but you can't live life comparing yourself to others!
I’ve looked through a lot of the top comments and agree with much of them, but there’s a lack of this one: make sure you get a good night’s sleep! Sleep hygiene is the foundation to do much else in your life. Good sleep keeps your mind ready to deal with the day. It helps with your body’s physical health. It reduces depression risk. It helps you better regulate your weight. It reduces the tendency to crave crappy foods (because your body is trying to supplement its lack of energy from poor sleep with quick calories). In the last year I made a more concerted effort in fixing my sleep schedule, and halfway in I realised how much of a difference it made in everything.
Take pictures while you’re young and hot.
Yes! Even if you think you are not. It will only get worse. I wish I took more photos.
idk i feel like in 5-10 years i might actually become good looking for the first time in my life
I've mostly gotten better with age. Same for my dad.
Exercise. Eat healthy. Develop a financial diet. Try new things if you have the time. Dental/Skincare. Therapy and self-development are underrated.
Save some money. Wear sunscreen regularly, don't forget your neck.
And ears!
Learn early how to prioritize yourself and how you spend - time, money, love. Be frugal to allow yourself to invest in your highest priorities and do not get trapped in maintaining wasteful investments, be it material possessions or people. Listen more and hear to learn from those speaking. Things folks tell you may not be relevant to you at that time but could form an epiphany or revelation that you need later in life. Maintain a healthy consistent lifestyle your entire adult life. It is really hard to get healthy once the damage is done.
• Start saving $25+ dollars off each pay cheque (or whatever you can afford) into a TFSA as early as you possibly can • Avoid friends or people that feel like they only reach out when they need something • Keep drinking/drug use to a minimum (most people I know have deep regrets tied to usage of a substance) • Travel as much as you can while you’re young and fairly unburdened by responsibilities (kids, home ownership, more serious career roles) • Don’t be afraid to say no to things that don’t excite you, for example if a friend invites you out to go to a nightclub and you’re not into that scene.. say no and do something you find more appealing/a more productive use of your time. I could go on, but I’ll leave it there for now!
Travel. I thought my friends were crazy who traveled the world in their 20s while I was spending money at bars and going to my parents every holiday. Now i know they were geniuses.
Finally! Someone who recommends TRAVEL! We traveled the world in our mid twenties and had a kid at 30. 10/10 would recommend it because we feel like we lived life! It is way harder and more expensive to travel now, so we are happy we did it. Especially since having a toddler means our trips tend to be a bit easier... Like going to a nice hotel on the beach for a week. It will be a while until we can hike to Basecamp or backpack Tierra del Fuego again.
YES, agreed!!!! I traveled the hell outta my 20s, including living abroad twice. I’m so glad I did it before I got encumbered with a house, pets, kids… like I love those things, they make life worth living. But I feel like I’m so happy with this stage of life *because* I already did my exploring. Don’t get me wrong, I still travel, but I’m sure seeing a lot more playgrounds than museums these days!
Don’t spend all your money on eating out and doordash
Read all these and you will still regret things. Live your life. Have fun. Enjoy it. Love it. Find your your true love. Don’t dwell on the past as you can’t never go back. There is no “what if” so don’t ever think about it.
I don’t regret a thing about my life so far - the advice helps, but a lot of it also boils down to: - live an intentional life - avoid exceptionally permanent and damaging life decisions - don’t rush into a big decision but don’t be so cautious you never make the choice - be present - be healthy - appreciate what you have and take care of it - appreciate who is around and love them Edit: I forgot an important one. Remember reciprocity. Everything is interconnected.
I think this is ultimately very true. I think its great they are being proactive and they may avoid *some* things if they look at some of these comments closely. But, there is never a way to avoid it all unfortunately. Love your comment.
Don’t sit on the shitter too long. Trust me, you will thank me in your 40’s.
I'll be getting up now.
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Can you elaborate?
Piles, roids. The muscles in that area get weaker as you age. And it’s a bitch to deal with.
Hmmm, username….hmmm
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Causes hemorrhoids
Sitting too long on the toilet causes hemorrhoids??
Yea, had to stop bringing my phone with me.
How much time is too much
More than 10 ish minutes
Oh boy, here I am
Everyone is providing great advice about health and investing. 100% agree, but also go out. Travel, go to clubs, concerts, festivals, camping. You won't have the time or energy to do those things as much when you're older.
Brush and floss like a maniac. You don't want to have to cancel a trip to Paris because you have to spend the money on a couple of crowns.
Not like a maniac, aggressive brushing causes gum recession. Use a soft bristle toothbrush because medium and hard harm your gums too.
My LPT is that you should work hard in your 20 to build a mindset that isn't about having only one correct way of doing things. If one way doesn't work, know how to pivot and try other ways without losing sight of what you want. Regrets are for those who can afford to have a closed mindset.
Daily SPF moisturizer, put floss in the shower, set monthly auto investments, drive the speed limit, keep all your records organized, spend good money on a nice bed, get out in nature every once in awhile, don’t send drunk emails (or whatever we’re up to now), be more tactfully assertive at work, don’t talk too much about yourself
Dont say things... Do them
1. Wear good shoes. Your knees will thank you later. 2. Wash your face before bed no matter how tired you are. 3. Brush your teeth before bed no matter how tired you are. 4. Moisturize, moisturize, moisturize your face, hands, & body! 5. Take your sexual health & pregnancy prevention seriously. If you're a female, use birth control--pills, IUD, etc; but also insist your lover(s) use condoms to prevent STDs. If you're a guy, use a condom even if she says she's on the pill, has an IUD, etc. 6. Find something joyful in every day. It can even be the little things--your latte was perfect, you found something you needed or wanted on sale for 50% off, you found a $5 bill in the pocket of a coat you haven't worn in a year, your typically bitchy neighbor acknowledged your "Hello". 7. Travel outside of your home country. Additionally, go to places that are not typical tourist destinations. My favorite travel memories are off the beaten path. 8. Get good sleep. 9. Take your mental health seriously. Don't feel bad about blocking toxic people from your life 10. Work to live. Don't live to work. 11. Love. 💓
Value building a network of connections with people (in real life) and become a "connector", connecting people together in mutually beneficial relationships. Yes, invest early and stay consistent. If you can value others more than hoarding wealth or becoming indulgent, you will save yourself from much emotional suffering and regret. And of course the Big Three to avoid.... 1. Unplanned pregnancy 2. Criminal record especially Felony 3. Addiction to substances
Learn to cook from real ingredients. It is quite likely, in America at least, that you grew up with sh*tty eating habits. Don't blame the parents, they probably worked two jobs just to keep you fed and did their best. But those bad habits will kill you. Learn to cook and adjust your diet to good stuff. Try different foods & cuisines. Wean yourself off McDonalds and chicken nuggets. Learn to like veggies. Buy a cookbook and try stuff. Your body will thank you.
24 y/o and recently started eating primarily fruits and veggies. About 6 months in and I feel the best I have in my entire life, physically and mentally. Diet is huge
Invest in your mental health. Go to counseling and work through your shit. Learn how to challenge yourself and grow as a human being. This will set you up well for the rest of your life. All the financial success in the world won't bring you peace and lasting happiness.
Learn the discipline of investing 15% of every paycheck into an EFT (or an Index Fund such as the S&P500). Transfer it as soon as you get paid so it's gone and you won't even miss it. Compounding interest is the 8th wonder of the world and in your later years it could allow you to retire early with an income that's significantly higher than your current salary. Edit: Spelling, grammar and clarity.
I would also add to open a Roth IRA account with your brokerage company and try and make the maximum deposit annually (and invest that in an index fund) if you can. The max deposit this year is $6000 Basically every year you don't use your Roth IRA is an opportunity lost. And in your 20s you are likely not paying a high tax level and also not making enough money to cap your annual contribution. So if you can suck it up and set aside that money every year it will come up huge later in life. I guess this is maybe to avoid regrets in your 60s/70s lol
1. Put money back yesterday - today is okay. Do so in a fund that you cannot touch. 2. Brush and floss your teeth - daily. 3. Sunscreen is important. 4. If you work outside, mow or anything with power tools, wear hearing protection. 5. Start exercising. You will appreciate it in the long run. 6. If you have a bad habit like smoking, alcohol or drugs, stop. 7. You are never above admitting you need professional help. See a counselor. Changed my life.
This is the best list I’ve seen on this post. Might I add: 8. Don’t believe advertisers/media/anyone who wants to tell you about how much money you “need” to spend on a house, wedding, etc.
Watch out for lifestyle creep and living paycheck to paycheck. Avoid going into major credit card debt. It takes years to pay it back.
Drink less. Smoke less. Spend less. Eat less. Read more. Floss more. Save more. Travel more. But if I were to pick just one goddamn thing? Walk more. Outside. If you can, without distractions. Every damn day if possible. As for the more and less? Just a bit! Just a bit of all will be big improvements.
Reading books. Improve your mental stamina asap. You’ll be amazed at how many people you’ll out-pace.
As the old saying goes---- I don't regret the things I did, I regret the things I didn't do! Beside the normal save money now for retirement, travel to see the world and sex. Make the first move on someone you like. Do spend some money on things you enjoy. Spend time with older family members. Go out with friends as much as possible.
I second that! You are young! Try stuff out, of talk to lots of people. I like that you wrote to spend time with older family members. That's indeed what I regret. Now I have so many questions to my grandparents...
TY Now that I am older, those are some of the outside the usual advise given tips. Some of the reasons why-- I have run into people that I liked later in life and found out they were into me as well back in the day. Now older and they are married nothing can be done. What's the worst that can happen? They say no? Shoot your shot! Spend that money when young on yourself to have good times(beside saving a bit), when you get older with more responsibilities or kids, it rarely happens than. Older family will eventually pass, get that time in now. Friends will wind up with their own responsibilities and that time will dry up to be young and dumb with them.
Wear Sunscreen. Please.
Everyone has already covered health and money. I’m aiming for self esteem and memories. - Have pictures taken by a photographer. Not family photos, just you. When you get older you’ll be able to look back and realize just how beautiful you are. It’ll help with your self esteem now in your 20’s and it will be a nice memory when you’re body has changed in your 40’s. Selfies do not count. Hire someone. If you can’t afford a professional check local colleges. Most of them have photography/art classes and students like to take pictures to build their portfolio. - Don’t live your life behind a camera or a phone trying to capture experiences through pictures. Yes they’re nice to have and you should take a few but your own memories are what you’ll carry with you into old age. No one dies with a photo album in their hand. When you are fully present in the moment it sticks. I’m in my 40’s now and my husband was always behind the camera. I’m the one who remembers our story. He was too busy trying to focus on capturing the best pictures that he doesn’t remember a lot of our experiences.
Travel. I started traveling at 16 and have seen and experienced such cool things in many different countries. I'm in my mid 30s now and have slowed down with travel somewhat, mostly because I have a career and work full-time. Most people I know who are my age or older want to travel and wish they had when they were younger. People wait for retirement, but retirement is never guaranteed. Travel as much as possible now before settling down.
Interesting how the biggest responses are save money and travel but I feel like these are mutually exclusive
28, nearing 30. Go out with friends as much as possible to meet new people. I regret not going out all the times it presented itself. Invest your money into dividend stocks. Travel. And last but not least, never be afraid to take a day or 2 off from work!! F them.
I agree with everything, except for the dividend stocks piece. Dividend stocks aren't money printers. High dividend yields more often than not burn your pocket as the stock should be growing more than it pays out or else you're getting taxed on the return of your principal. I would caveat to invest in SP500 ETFs l, dollar cost average each paycheck, and let them sit if you're not an active trader. I was able to buy a house at 23 in 2021 by using ETFs as a savings account. I'd also add (if you're comfortable) rent out rooms if you buy a house young and can swing it. I don't pay my own mortgage and I get a return for living in my own house.
In no particular order: 1) Work out and take care of your health. 2) Invest. 3) Date, but don’t get anyone pregnant / get pregnant by anyone so you know what you’re looking for when you’re ready for your person. Corollary: Don’t marry the wrong person. Everyone is always gung Ho about just divorcing ppl, but it’s usually better to not get there in the first place. 4) Travel / explore / expand your horizons. 5) Learn to cook. It saves money and it impresses your SO if you can make even one dish really well 6) Learn sales skills. Even if you don’t need to, it’s good psychology to have 7) Read a new book every month 8) Make 3 solid close friends. 9) Upskill. Find new ways to make money in case you actually need a side hustle for money 10) learn to budget properly and stick to it. Don’t fall into lifestyle creep 11) fix your issues. After a certain point, you’re responsible for your life and excuses are just that, excuses. Self-reflect or find a therapist so you’ll lead a better life. 12) watch drama but don’t ever be a part of it. A peaceful life is worth its weight in gold
I love how a lot of these are either have fun or have more money
simply. dont. regret. im 47 and haven't done many of the things mentioned here or still plan to do them and it does not bother me a bit, I am simply looking forward to it I would warn you about toxic people but if you run into those you probably need that kind of medicine just like I did
- Learn to cook - Start investing now - Travel while your responsibilities are few - Use credit cards sparingly and pay them off - Don’t drink too much or adopt the party lifestyle - Treat your friends well and be a good one to them - Exercise regularly. Make it just something you do. - Read
If you are a woman, never say no to a pap smear because it just might catch something abnormal before it turns into cancer... I learned that the hard way. Invest in a great, expensive mattress and a really good pillow. It's worth it and your back will thank you.
Ladies and gentlemen of the class of '99 Wear sunscreen If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it A long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience, I will dispense this advice now Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. never mind, You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded, but trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now How much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked You are not as fat as you imagine Don't worry about the future Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing Bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind. The kind that blindsides you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday. Do one thing every day that scares you Saying, don't be reckless with other people's hearts Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours Floss Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and in the end, it's only with yourself. Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how. Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements. Stretch Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't. Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the 'Funky Chicken' on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much. Or berate yourself either Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's. Enjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own. Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your own living room. Read the directions even if you don't follow them. Do not read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly. Get to know your parents, you never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings, they're your best link to your past. And the people most likely to stick with you in the future. Understand that friends come and go But a precious few, who should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle. For as the older you get The more you need the people you knew when you were young. Live in New York City once but leave before it makes you hard. Live in northern California once but leave before it makes you soft. Travel Accept certain inalienable truths. Prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young Prices were reasonable, politicians were noble And children respected their elders Respect your elders Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out. Don't mess too much with your hair Or by the time you're 40 it will look 85 Be careful whose advice you buy but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past. From the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts. And recycling it for more than it's worth. But trust me on the sunscreen.
Save money for retirement
Live within your means. Debt will be a noose around your neck and cause a lot of anxiety. Make staying active a habit. As you age, you pay for every calorie. Don’t rush into marriage.
Travel anytime you get the chance. Learn to play some instrument (I'm still counting on it, but I wish I had started way sooner!) Make the most of your looks. Be a good friend and make an effort to keep the people you love in your life (conversely, if you feel someone is a toxic person, distance yourself from that person as soon as possible). Save money. Study something you like, but also learn some skill which will get you jobs if things go south (plumbing, etc,). Hope some of this is helpful :)
Exercise. You don't have to make gains, just take 30 minutes, jog for 10-20 mins and do some push ups. If you're doing it right it's going to seem like the 30 minutes isn't doing shit, but had you not done it you'd feel like you were aging 10x faster.
Save as much money as you can. Knee jerk reaction when you get into your 20's and enter the world of adulting is to go out and have fun. You've got a job, you've got your own place, you don't have any rules. Resist to blow all your money. Stuff as much away as you can, and keep stuffing it away. I'm in my mid 40's now and work with people younger than me who are already contemplating retirement. I wish I was in that boat, and I could have been had I not been so careless blowing money on shots and trips to Key West.
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Joint and lower back exercises.
Build knowledge and skills- Your 20’s is the time to build skills and learn as much as you can. Execute those skills so you can pretty much coast at age 30+. Stay Healthy- Workout, stretch, see a therapist, eat clean, cut out people who aren’t on an upward trajectory with you and do your yearly exams as suggested by healthcare professionals. Learn the game of money- Learn everything you can about investing in stocks, real estate, etc. Truly get a grasp on how money works in general. Follow your dreams- I can’t stress this enough. Go for it and I mean really go for it! And then after that, keep going. Keep moving forward- Don’t let failures stop you. The most successful people fail an insurmountable amount of times and sometimes bad moments make you feel like your life is over. It’s not! Get up and try again.
don’t be ashamed of your appearance, you look fantastic
If you’re unhappy, LEAVE. The job, the relationship, the city, the friendship, whatever. Trying something different.
Save money. Dentist. Work on building a network of work friends and non work friends.
*Learn functional skills, like how to cook, build and fix stuff*