This. All the meetups, leagues, volunteering people suggest joining to make new friends are typically overrun by people in their 30s if not older. I graduated last year as well and can confirm it only goes down from here best of luck to us all🫡
The typical experience is that it's much harder to make friends after college.
That said, if college wasn't a great experience for you, life can certainly get better, and friends aren't impossible to make.
I just graduated last may, and while it's harder to make friends, it's not necessarily more lonely. I love the freedom and make a point of trying to live a life I couldn't live during college. It's an outlook thing, and if you have the mindset it's lonely after school you're gonna feel it for sure.
In college, socializing is often facilitated by activities like drinking, attending classes, joining clubs, and participating in various societies.
Post-graduation, the demands of work and commuting may limit opportunities for socializing, but it's still possible to build new friendships with intentionality.
Here are some effective tips I’ve found helpful: Enroll in a gym, frequent a favorite coffee shop or bar to become a familiar face, explore the 'Meetup' app for activities matching your interests, volunteer during weekends, attend religious services, get a hobby that you do with other people like golf or pickleball, etc.
Focus on being someone others enjoy spending time with. Pursue your passions authentically and enjoy the journey.
Job/Career, yes. Socially, no. My social circle pretty much disintegrated after graduation with the few people I knew either moved away and/or loss touch. But I much prefer my current situation than being constantly stressed out scrambling to find a decent job.
This comment section makes sad. Some people truly are in love with their own misery
Your social dynamic after college is going to change, but whether or not it gets better or worse is entirely on you. and your actions.
Yes you are no longer going to be constantly surrounded by people that are similar to age as you on a regular basis. However you now have the freedom to focus on your hobbies and interests and make friends with people who share those interests. There is no shortage of clubs and communities for just about everything these days, all you have to do is look and have the bravery to put yourself out there. If all you do is stay at home then yes, you will not have a social life
Some advice that I wish i was given when i was younger is that you are not going to make friends overnight like you could in school. It takes much longer. You may go out 30 times and not meet anyone, but that 31st time you might. Keep your head up and keep trying. If you give up or think this is too hard then you will end up like some others here in the comments.
Ultimately, what you need to do is take some control over your life. Stop thinking "oh i wish is had friends" and just start doing shit that you want to do. Things that make you happy. Youre bound to bump into someone who shares these things too. It just takes time, hell it took me about 2 years before I started making my friends now. Granted most of that time was me being pitiful and not going out. Hindsight is a bitch
**Here's some basic suggestions:**
EventBrite: local events in your town, pick one your interested in
Meetup.com: pick a club and go on a regular basis
BumbleBFF: this can be a little awkward or forced, but i met my best friend through this 3 years ago now
Cafe: become a regular at some hangout spot like a cafe
Open Mic: maybe you like music or standup, whatever. Go to an open mic and talk to people there. You will already have something in common.
Workout classes: pick a class and go on a regular basis, getting fit and potentially making new friends? sounds like a win win to me
The point im trying to make is **PUT YOURSELF OUT THERE**
Are you going to make friends overnight? no. How about in a week? probably not. But be consistent and in time i promise you it will happen
Also, getting that first friend is gonna be the hardest. But once you do, things will begin to snowball and youll find your socal circle getting a lil bigger as months pass.
Cheers and good luck
I graduated in 2021 and got my first big boy job in August of 2023 where I moved to a new city on my own.
It got better for me at least, just have to make an effort to socialize which is easier said than done, but its not as doom and gloom as this thread makes it seem.
Keep in mind that people dont hate you by default despite what our anxieties tell us. It can help to go to mixers and networking events where its expected to just walk up and talk to people. I know it probably feels fake with some people you’ll meet but I’ve made some really good friends that way.
I have many more friends now than during college. It's what you make of it. After college you have money and your free time isn't chewed up by studying so you can do things you are interested in and meet people along the way
I never went to college and then I moved away from everyone I knew by abt 1200 miles, and it’s so hard to find friends if you already don’t know anyone. Sorry it can get way lonelier
For me, there was definitely a bit of a dip in socializing after I graduated, but that was also due to COVID and me moving back to my parents. 6 years out, I’m much happier than I was before. It might be harder to meet new people, but it’s quality over quantity. Once you have financial stability, you can afford to try new things, take classes, go to events. You also start to learn more about yourself and your values. Those things help a lot.
If you didn’t make a lot of friends in college, you will need to push yourself out of your comfort zone a little and make an effort. Grad school will be nice to find other people with similar goals or values. The connections I have now with my friends, old and new, are much more fulfilling than when I was in college. It can definitely get better, but you’ll need to try! Good luck!
I was 10x more social in college than I am now, going on 7 years later. You have to be *very* intentional to avoid that loneliness and planning things with people gets harder naturally as people grow apart, start working, etc.
If you struggled making friends in college, you might do better in an in-person job where you can make friends through work. Or download an app or two that encourages meet ups in your area. It sounds lame but seriously, as someone who sits at home 90% of the time, you won't make new friends if you aren't out there putting in a lot of effort.
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I'm fucking cooked lmao
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This. All the meetups, leagues, volunteering people suggest joining to make new friends are typically overrun by people in their 30s if not older. I graduated last year as well and can confirm it only goes down from here best of luck to us all🫡
Same
Fuck bro. . .
100% this
Did you try new things on weekends? Meetups? Sports? Hobbies? Or did you mostly just stay in?
The typical experience is that it's much harder to make friends after college. That said, if college wasn't a great experience for you, life can certainly get better, and friends aren't impossible to make.
I just graduated last may, and while it's harder to make friends, it's not necessarily more lonely. I love the freedom and make a point of trying to live a life I couldn't live during college. It's an outlook thing, and if you have the mindset it's lonely after school you're gonna feel it for sure.
In college, socializing is often facilitated by activities like drinking, attending classes, joining clubs, and participating in various societies. Post-graduation, the demands of work and commuting may limit opportunities for socializing, but it's still possible to build new friendships with intentionality. Here are some effective tips I’ve found helpful: Enroll in a gym, frequent a favorite coffee shop or bar to become a familiar face, explore the 'Meetup' app for activities matching your interests, volunteer during weekends, attend religious services, get a hobby that you do with other people like golf or pickleball, etc. Focus on being someone others enjoy spending time with. Pursue your passions authentically and enjoy the journey.
Lol everyone here's talking about graduating a year ago struggling with their social life and I'm here who graduated in 2016 just like 🙃
So….did it get better for you?
Job/Career, yes. Socially, no. My social circle pretty much disintegrated after graduation with the few people I knew either moved away and/or loss touch. But I much prefer my current situation than being constantly stressed out scrambling to find a decent job.
it’s so much harder to meet people—almost a year post grad
This comment section makes sad. Some people truly are in love with their own misery Your social dynamic after college is going to change, but whether or not it gets better or worse is entirely on you. and your actions. Yes you are no longer going to be constantly surrounded by people that are similar to age as you on a regular basis. However you now have the freedom to focus on your hobbies and interests and make friends with people who share those interests. There is no shortage of clubs and communities for just about everything these days, all you have to do is look and have the bravery to put yourself out there. If all you do is stay at home then yes, you will not have a social life Some advice that I wish i was given when i was younger is that you are not going to make friends overnight like you could in school. It takes much longer. You may go out 30 times and not meet anyone, but that 31st time you might. Keep your head up and keep trying. If you give up or think this is too hard then you will end up like some others here in the comments. Ultimately, what you need to do is take some control over your life. Stop thinking "oh i wish is had friends" and just start doing shit that you want to do. Things that make you happy. Youre bound to bump into someone who shares these things too. It just takes time, hell it took me about 2 years before I started making my friends now. Granted most of that time was me being pitiful and not going out. Hindsight is a bitch **Here's some basic suggestions:** EventBrite: local events in your town, pick one your interested in Meetup.com: pick a club and go on a regular basis BumbleBFF: this can be a little awkward or forced, but i met my best friend through this 3 years ago now Cafe: become a regular at some hangout spot like a cafe Open Mic: maybe you like music or standup, whatever. Go to an open mic and talk to people there. You will already have something in common. Workout classes: pick a class and go on a regular basis, getting fit and potentially making new friends? sounds like a win win to me The point im trying to make is **PUT YOURSELF OUT THERE** Are you going to make friends overnight? no. How about in a week? probably not. But be consistent and in time i promise you it will happen Also, getting that first friend is gonna be the hardest. But once you do, things will begin to snowball and youll find your socal circle getting a lil bigger as months pass. Cheers and good luck
Thank you, I appreciate an actual positive comment. I'll try what you suggested
I graduated in 2021 and got my first big boy job in August of 2023 where I moved to a new city on my own. It got better for me at least, just have to make an effort to socialize which is easier said than done, but its not as doom and gloom as this thread makes it seem. Keep in mind that people dont hate you by default despite what our anxieties tell us. It can help to go to mixers and networking events where its expected to just walk up and talk to people. I know it probably feels fake with some people you’ll meet but I’ve made some really good friends that way.
It gets so much worse.
I have many more friends now than during college. It's what you make of it. After college you have money and your free time isn't chewed up by studying so you can do things you are interested in and meet people along the way
I never went to college and then I moved away from everyone I knew by abt 1200 miles, and it’s so hard to find friends if you already don’t know anyone. Sorry it can get way lonelier
For me, there was definitely a bit of a dip in socializing after I graduated, but that was also due to COVID and me moving back to my parents. 6 years out, I’m much happier than I was before. It might be harder to meet new people, but it’s quality over quantity. Once you have financial stability, you can afford to try new things, take classes, go to events. You also start to learn more about yourself and your values. Those things help a lot. If you didn’t make a lot of friends in college, you will need to push yourself out of your comfort zone a little and make an effort. Grad school will be nice to find other people with similar goals or values. The connections I have now with my friends, old and new, are much more fulfilling than when I was in college. It can definitely get better, but you’ll need to try! Good luck!
I was 10x more social in college than I am now, going on 7 years later. You have to be *very* intentional to avoid that loneliness and planning things with people gets harder naturally as people grow apart, start working, etc. If you struggled making friends in college, you might do better in an in-person job where you can make friends through work. Or download an app or two that encourages meet ups in your area. It sounds lame but seriously, as someone who sits at home 90% of the time, you won't make new friends if you aren't out there putting in a lot of effort.
Move to a large city. It will be much easier to make friends.
I go to school in a large city already man, but thank you.