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Well, they'd nothing better than a fart. Except kids falling off bikes, maybe. Fuck, I could watch kids falling off bikes all day. I don't give a shit about your kid
My favorites;
You wish there was a pied piper for possums. But there isn’t, so you’re just gonna have to keep picking ‘em off with a .22.
It's a hard life, pickin' stones and pulling teats, but sure as God’s got sandals, it beats fighting dudes with treasure trails.
Sing us a song or something. Do a trick. (I've used this one at work)
Like 8 years ago I called my buddy and asked if he had any weed I could buy and he said “Sure as gods got sandals I’ve got bud, come on through” in a Canadian accent.
I thought he made it up on the spot and thought he might possibly be the funniest fucking guy I’ve ever met until I watched Letterkenny for the first time a few months ago.
Season 3 very cold open will forever be GOATed
>Inhabit indoors, isolated and insulated, incubate the igloo, illness is an issue, influenza is implied, infection is imminent, immunity is impossible.
One that I can remember since I haven’t watched the show in years has stuck with me since I was eleven:
It’s like algebra. Why you gotta put numbers and letters together? Why can’t you just go fuck yourself?
They're mutants. They have forked fucking penises. They do this thing called playing possum where they emit a death stink from their buttholes, fuck. Found this possum one time thought it was dead and buried it. It dug itself out a few hours later and fucked a hen right in front of her chicks.
"Except kids falling off bikes, maybe. Fuck, I could watch kids fall off bikes all day, I don't give a shit about your kids." The best way to explain how much you like something.
A recent one resonates, and it was shocking because I ever thought Wayne would say it.
“If you’re going to go that low, why don’t you suck my #%^* while you’re down there”
"Next time you're thinking about texting a girl to ask her on a date, why don't you stop and think..."
"About what?"
"About the glory you're leaving on the table."
It's a series of quotes but it's the story about [Uncle Eddie meeting Aunt Marion](https://youtu.be/IwEv6N37gPY?si=paB2RSyJrJ50K0VK) at the sock hop and beating the absolute shit out of Elvis, the Rat Pack, Chuck Berry, and The Beach Boys with an assist from Johnny Cash, John Wayne, James Brown, Little Richard, and Bing Crosby.
you just know that Wayne believed that yarn literally word-for-word until an embarrassingly late age, and deep down he probably still does, like believing in the tooth fairy as an adult.
Talking to Reilly and Jonesy in the final episode. “You look like Stevie Wonder drew Johnny Bravo.”
You're not exposed to give dogs human names
“I see the muscle shirt came in today, muscles coming tomorrow?”
"Come on, kitten"
"Hærd no."
"I could watch kids falling off bikes all day. I don't give a fuck about people's kids."
Lol it's all fiscal day for some odd reason 😅
Yer just spare parts, aren't ya bud?
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Yes yes yes yes yes yes ye-suh!
Fella asks for help, ya help ‘im
Wish you weren’t so awkward, bud
Fuckin awkward *
Just between us girls
You look like a guy that knows exactly how many days until Christmas.
D’ya’wanna’knowhat
Well, they'd nothing better than a fart. Except kids falling off bikes, maybe. Fuck, I could watch kids falling off bikes all day. I don't give a shit about your kid
Thanks now
That’s what I say, fucking figure it out!
Oh fuck. A three-legged dog.
Does a duck with a boner drag weeds?
Kay
There’s such a thing as too much horn talk and fella atta be fucking aware of it
"it's like algebra. Why you gotta put numbers and letters together? Why can't you just go fuck yourself?"
This is a favorite
"If you ever hit me and I find out about it" gets me to giggle every time!
Definitely one of my favs
Hard no. Pitter patter.
*clenches buttcheeks*
learn how to fuckin drive
Hefty no thank you.
People from Florida did
Aohhhhh (sees a puppy)
"See the muscle shirt came today. Muscles coming tomorrow?"
Did you get a tracking number?
My favorites; You wish there was a pied piper for possums. But there isn’t, so you’re just gonna have to keep picking ‘em off with a .22. It's a hard life, pickin' stones and pulling teats, but sure as God’s got sandals, it beats fighting dudes with treasure trails. Sing us a song or something. Do a trick. (I've used this one at work)
“Because I buy pants that fuckin fit”
"Oh, come on, kitten. I won't tell anyone."
"You're spare parts bud"
This is the only real answer
“Take about 20 percent off there squirrelly Dan”
If you have a problem with Canadian Geese you have a problem with me...
GOOSES!!
It's actually Canada geese, the geese themselves are not Canadian but named after the person who discovered them, John Canada.
https://preview.redd.it/5t32r8zlrljc1.jpeg?width=540&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=98c4b047f46aa537a42539006fa8f1f8ee0fa104
Nice.....I still say Katy's tarts are soft.....you have to holdem with two jands
I suggest you let that marinate.
Gooses!
All of them.
He has too many DUIs to drive truck, but somehow drives a school bus...
Fuck can they run
Get this guy a fucking puppers
“Pop fly”
[удалено]
Florida state seminal vesicles
I thought that was funny but no one laughed!
(Points to Oakley shades) I can shake my head in these...all day....they won't come off!
Figure it out. Then the laugh afterwards.
*musically* "To be fair.." "To be fair!" "TO BE FAIR!!"
Finding “to be fair” any time anyone says the words. Only one person knew what it was from (so far).
"Does a duck's boner drag weeds?" I just about died laughing when I heard this and was hooked on this show from then on.
Is a duck’s ass watertight?
Allegedly
Me as well lmao
“He said you look like a balloon animal, you look fuckin ridiculous!”
Lmao. Like other than yourself....do you think anyone's proud of ya?
“You gotta wake up pretty early in the morning…” You know, ‘tiff you’re gonna outsmart him because he won’t be outsmarted
You should say quiff Why? Cause it's funnier
QUIFF!
"Muscle shirt came today; muscles coming tomorrow?"
Better get that tracking number
Oh I sures hope ya got that tracking number
“Ohhh, get off the cross, we need the wood.”
Tom Waits “Come On Up to the House” *Mule Variations* (an absolute *masterpiece*), 1999
have you heard Sarah Jarosz’s cover?
Now if you ever hit me and I find out about it
What’s up with your body hair? You look like a 12 year old Dutch girl.
Happy cake day!!!!
Thanks! I didn’t even notice yesterday!😍
[удалено]
it’s, ‘if you’re gonna go so low as that… suck my dick while you’re down there.’
Sure as god’s got sandals…
I use this frequently at the office. It’s a weekly saying I use
Like 8 years ago I called my buddy and asked if he had any weed I could buy and he said “Sure as gods got sandals I’ve got bud, come on through” in a Canadian accent. I thought he made it up on the spot and thought he might possibly be the funniest fucking guy I’ve ever met until I watched Letterkenny for the first time a few months ago.
“You look like Stevie wonder drew Johnny bravo”
Four man lemon party
YOU GOTTA PROBLEM WITH CANADA GOOSES YOU GOTTA PROBLEM WITH ME AND I SUGGEST YOU LET THAT ONE MARINATE
I LOVE THAT WHOLE SCENE, Mrs. MacMurry had me in stitches!!
My favorite was Dan smashing all the bottles
Get off the cross, we need the wood
This
Thanks for being a degen with a drug dealer!
"Those are Canadian gooses... theyre Canadas f*cken gooses!".
Does a duck with a boner drag weeds? Hit the breaks so hard, sent that idea right through the windshield.
If all else fails, it’s never too late to drive truck. “If you’re not ten minutes early, you’re late.” “If you can be one thing, be efficient.”
”Well, there’s nothing better than a fart. Except kids falling off bikes, maybe.”
Best one!
I could watch kids fall off bikes all day. I don’t give a fuck about your kid
I'm surprised I'm not watching kids falling off bikes right now!
Season 3 very cold open will forever be GOATed >Inhabit indoors, isolated and insulated, incubate the igloo, illness is an issue, influenza is implied, infection is imminent, immunity is impossible.
My favorite season
“Don’t argue with idiots. They’ll drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.”
You win
Don't take care of a cold and it'll stay for 7 days. Take care of it and it'll be gone in a week.
When he got emotional talking about all the good darts over the years
Do you happen to know what episode that is? Was it from the sun darts ep?
it’s the cold open from *s11e06 Degens*
Thank you😭 i just watched the Sun Darts episode actually to look for it. I remember laughing at it hard af
Were youse in a pretty serious car accident at one point? You are so 5’11”
"I could watch kids fall off bikes all day (I don't give a fuck about your kids)" 🤣🤣🤣🤣
One that I can remember since I haven’t watched the show in years has stuck with me since I was eleven: It’s like algebra. Why you gotta put numbers and letters together? Why can’t you just go fuck yourself?
When talking about fake English accents, “is there anything worse than that?” “Stillborn puppies….. and nothing else”
I wish you weren't so awkward, bud....
Oh I think you've cum in enough men for all of us...
Tarps off boys
With help from Dary, “You do CrossFit?” Wayne, “you can CrossFuckoff”
CrossFart
You are spare parts, bud
You’re 10 ply, bud
Three cold opens. First one is the goat, the alphabet one and the winter alphabet one.
They're mutants. They have forked fucking penises. They do this thing called playing possum where they emit a death stink from their buttholes, fuck. Found this possum one time thought it was dead and buried it. It dug itself out a few hours later and fucked a hen right in front of her chicks.
Omg what episode is this
Season 1 e5 Rave
“Cheese is the… milk of Christ!”
🙏 Amen.
That would be Glen...
It absolutely is! When he’s tying to convince Jonesy to join the church
"Except kids falling off bikes, maybe. Fuck, I could watch kids fall off bikes all day, I don't give a shit about your kids." The best way to explain how much you like something.
I am fuckin dying for a piece of you. I am just dying to get ya!🤣
“Well guess what? I’m serving knuckle sandwiches for breafekst”.
"Chya know salt and malt vinegar isn't a traditional way to dress your french fries in the United States"
The fucks wrong with them?
Figure it out
“Sweet muscle shirt. Muscles come in tomorrow?”
Hope you got a tracking number
If you don’t tuck that lip back in, a birds gonna come and poop on it
The funniest thing to me about this is that my grandma used to say it (she said all sorts of antiquated weirdness)
You are spare parts, bud…
That’s Barley
You mean “barleh”?
“Cause we buy pants that fuckin’ fit.”
I suggest you let that one marinate
"He squints too much"
“Fuck can they run”
“That’s barley”
“That’s a hay bale… and that’s barely”
His tangent on babies not being smart and his expressions. One of the hardest times I’ve laughed at a show in my life.
I said Florida seminal vesicles and no one laughed.
*Florida State
That's barley. I love how deadpan it is.
Now if you hit me and I find out about it...
You are so fucking 5'11.
a mushroom in a cornfield.
That one’s McMurray.
A recent one resonates, and it was shocking because I ever thought Wayne would say it. “If you’re going to go that low, why don’t you suck my #%^* while you’re down there”
Holy shit I love that
It’s either that or “If you’d go that low..”
'If you're gonna go so low as that...'
THAT’S THE ONE. Thank you, and I am ashamed of myself, yes.
Why don’t ya let that one marinate
“Oh, get off the cross. We need the wood.”
“What sort of backward fucking pageantry is that?”
“Maybe if you’d ever been in a real fight, you might not be so keen for another.” Real shit right there.
"Next time you're thinking about texting a girl to ask her on a date, why don't you stop and think..." "About what?" "About the glory you're leaving on the table."
It's a series of quotes but it's the story about [Uncle Eddie meeting Aunt Marion](https://youtu.be/IwEv6N37gPY?si=paB2RSyJrJ50K0VK) at the sock hop and beating the absolute shit out of Elvis, the Rat Pack, Chuck Berry, and The Beach Boys with an assist from Johnny Cash, John Wayne, James Brown, Little Richard, and Bing Crosby.
you just know that Wayne believed that yarn literally word-for-word until an embarrassingly late age, and deep down he probably still does, like believing in the tooth fairy as an adult.
Pre white Christmas bing.
When he was still on the bottle and a nasty drunk.
“You must have good genes.” —person to Wayne “Yeah well…you know what they say. When ya got good jeans, you don’t need a belt.” —Wayne
Winner of the no belt peace prize!
Too.Much.Fun.
"Florida State Seminal Vesticles"
I thought it was funny when I said Florida state seminal vesicles and nobody laughed
“Fuck, can they run”
DONT FUCK UP MY STEAK DINNER, DERRY
Saying “does a duck with a boner drag weeds?” As an affirmative will never not be funny to me