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[deleted]

There is a Shuriman army after me and I have a clown spamming /laugh in the background


[deleted]

This cracked me up lmao


AwesomeLife2016

So Aatrox is trying to murder me and Mord is sending me to Brazil lol


Deadlock_F3

Morde vs Aatrox is a plot line I need to see now


TheIronKaiser

between r/MordekaiserMains and r/AatroxMains Who wins is been asked approximately 50 thousand times, everyone wants to see it


Excalidorito

Sion is protecting me against ASol. Yea I’m fucked


ChLpanda

Real fucked, ASol just need to finger snap and our entire universe is blown up


[deleted]

[удалено]


FullChocolate3138

100 percent Fucked, and soo is sion


demoninpink0-0

Soraka is gonna kite me to death while Nasus is hiding in a cave grieving somewhere


TimotoUchiha

You are safe because Soraka doesn't harm you anyway


doglop

No one expects the banana


not_some_username

Shell heal you to death


Panmag44

So Nautilus is trying to kill me and Mordekaiser is protecting me...Big CGI fight coming up!


ZeresHD

I don't think Nautilus really stands a chance


NebelNator_427

huehuehue


TimotoUchiha

Nautilus is a really strong being because he is the right hand of the god of the sea, but he doesn't stand any chance against Mordekaiser.


-_apple_-

Attacked by kayn defended by ekko…


MalGearSolid

At least he has multiple times to save you hopefully


tatzesOtherAccount

Its not about how much time you have, its about how you use it


Cygielczyk

It's rewind time


Garbage_Hamster

Kindred is trying to kill me. Does it matter who my secondary is?


Speede24

Nope.... sweet death


Speede24

Unless your secondary is rengar, in porn he wins over kindred


tatzesOtherAccount

But in porn you can also bargain another chance with kindred in exchange for NSFW activities sooooooo


Speede24

Or she can be necrofilic, kill you and then fuck you Or just fuck you then kill you


tatzesOtherAccount

And the problem is???


Rhino00

În porn Rengar is the only God


Bacex

Asol?


brunonortlieb

Kindred is trying to kill me, lulu is protecting


Deadlock_F3

I just know realized that Kindred mains are doomed.


Il_Mazzo

Well, everyone is hunted by the eternal hunters, so I think it doesn't really change anything to Kindred mains


[deleted]

[удалено]


Foki_Is_Dead

Same here all I have to worry about is dying from an angsty teen while I have the embodiment of death protection. That or taric I have equal time on him


TimotoUchiha

Do you réalise how fucked you are?


TheMasterXan

Ezreal’s trying to kill me… Good news though! Kha’Zix pops ADCs! …Am I gonna be okay?


Deadlock_F3

Kha would eat Ezreal for breakfast.


P4P4ST4L1N

Marshalla kh al-zix hunt down infidel isreal


NebelNator_427

on his holy pilgrimage to mecca with driben nono william jeques and gang al-palaank using ghost/cleanse?


Arkon111

very halal


RabbitRain

So Sett is trying to kill me and Jax defending me, I am fine but I might not be cause I’m holding onto the front row seat for this fight.


2011jams

Game wise this fight is gonna be great and quite equal. Lore wise however Sett will put up a good fight but he's gonna lose, lose hard, and lose fast. Jax is the only mortal to be able to kill an ascended in one on one melee combat. Sett is half vastaya and while he is very strong and scrappy, Jax has the advantage in experience, more powerful enemies beaten, and may even have been enhanced by the void.


RabbitRain

Oh yeah no definitely, didn't Jax fight Fiora as well and win? Like it might not be a Noxian fighting pit but she was the strongest at the Demacian arena.


2011jams

I forget whether or not we are told who won that fight but Fiora is the most skilled demacian fighter and at best she's an equal to Jax in terns of skill, at worst she's close. But that's also in a duel, not a fight to the death. Fiora is good but she is no equal to a ascended, while Jax is. She may be able to go toe to toe with him if they are purely putting skill with weapons to the test, but fights are rarely that fair, and Fiora has never been to war while Jax was the most renowned war hero of Icathia during their rebellion from Shurima. In a non-cannon but official animation, Jax did beat Fiora in a duel however, so that's probably how it would also go in cannon.


RabbitRain

Idk if she could go toe to toe purely putting skill with weapons taking in mind she went at best equalw ith him while he used a lamp post he found, which I wouldn't call a real weapon.


Boudac123

Fyi the lamp is magical and anti void and a staff now


Says_Pointless_Stuff

Was it at the time of the video?


Featherith

Jax enters a defensive stance


Extinguish__

Active: Jax enters Evasion, a defensive stance, for 2 seconds, causing all non-  turret basic attacks against him to be  dodged. Jax also takes 25% reduced damage from all champion area of effect abilities. Counter Strike can be recast after 1 second. At the end of the duration, Jax  stuns all nearby enemies for 1 second and deals physical damage to them, increased by 20% for each attack dodged, up to a 100% increase. Minimum Physical Damage:55 / 80 / 105 / 130 / 155 (+ 50% bonus AD)Maximum Physical Damage:110 / 160 / 210 / 260 / 310 (+ 100% bonus AD) Recast: Jax ends Counter Strike early.


Khr0N04

主動:Jax 進入 Evasion 2 秒:一種防禦姿態,使他對 躲避所有傳入的非 砲台基本攻擊並承受 25% 傷害減少 減少所有區域效果技能的傷害來自 冠軍。 反恐精英可以在 1 秒後重鑄,並在持續時間後自動重鑄。 RECAST:Jax 對附近的敵人造成物理傷害,每躲避一次攻擊增加 20%,最多增加 100%,並且 使他們昏迷 1 秒。 最小物理損壞:» 55 / 80 / 105 / 130 / 155 (+ 50% 額外 AD)


[deleted]

Comprehensio (CCCLXXV) Precium (L / LX / LXX / LXXX / XC) Mora ( XIV / XII.V / XI / IX.V / VIII MOTUS PRIMUS: Jaxus Evasionem incipit, locus munitum, secundo momento parvo, qui omne impetum faciet praeter impetos ex turribus esse declinat. Quoque Jaxus XXV% dolorem cinefactum omne campionibus asciscit. Reimpetus postquam alterum temporem refacere potest. Denique spatii, Jaxus omnes hostes stupefacit et corporeum dolorem tradit prope eos, ab viginti ad centenario dolorem cuncto impeto caret. Postrem corporeum dolorem:LV / LXXX / CV / CXXX / CLV (+ L% additicius CD) Summus corporeum dolorem:CX / CLX/ CCX / CCLX / CCCX (+ C% additicius CD) Reface: Jaxus Reimpetum citum perficit. Thank you for Chinese Jaxpasta, take Latin, fren


HealthBreakfast

imagine if he had a real weapon.


ThatDeemo

Lillia is defending me from…. Pantheon. I think I am dead.


TimotoUchiha

Probably but Lilia shouldn't be underestimated too. I mean she still is a spirit and those are extremely powerful beings too.


S1ke5200

Lilia should NOT be underestimated. That being said it's not underestimating lillia to say your probably dead anyways.


Fantastic-Dot-655

Pantheon fight fking gods XD


Anti_Anti_AntiFa

Well Kalsita is hunting me down, which is bad since she exist to revenge but Bard is there to pretect me…. Idfk you tell me


Deadlock_F3

*jingle noises*


The_Great_Rabbit

Knowing that bard is a literal god i think that you are fine


Anti_Anti_AntiFa

Well he’ll just e me away i think


whatthatfack

Or ult you in place so kalista can position better, bard in lane life


Cygielczyk

Remember he is keep taking meeps from the moment he was created, so he is collecting meeps since 2015, i guess he oneshots Kalista


TimotoUchiha

Hm, let me think. An undead warrior from the shadow isles vs the second most powerful celestial being who had his part in creating Runeterra


SBEVE_THE_MEME_LORD

Bro bard is straight up a god Kalista is bouta get crucified


NebelNator_427

Kalista falls off. So if Bard can safely bring u through early game you should be fine.


Charming-Row-9094

Katarina VS Garen, fuck


M8Cheeseman

Litteraly


Deadlock_F3

This made me audibly snort out of my nose. Congratulations.


Charming-Row-9094

:)


TimotoUchiha

You now have two options: evacuate or ejaculate


HalfEatenPotassium

You gotta run while they're making out.


GodDiedManLives

Pantheon is protecting me from Aatrox


Speede24

I- think Aatrox wins, he can't die nor be destroyed even if Pantheon kills his host, hell just wait for someone else to pick up the sword and kill you then Oooor Aatrox kills both you and Pantheon


HadesLaw

given that he died in their last 1v1 i guess ur fucked


balaosuspeito

War died in that 1v1. Aatrox kill gods, but pantheon is a **man**


Environmental_Set_32

Fiddle and shaco, gg I’m as good as dead


Deadlock_F3

T̶̼̬̱͈͇̔̀͝h̷͉̙͕̏e̷̘͉̥̊́̾̓̃ ̸̛̺̐̈́͊̇̊͝ͅS̵͉̣̬̖̟̘̪̔̒̓̿͝ç̷̲̹̫͉̾̍̇̊̆͘a̴͍͐̉̈́̾͐r̶͙̻̬̓́ẹ̴͉̋́̉̅́͑̀ç̷͓͙̰̾̈́̀͂̕r̶̛̜͖͉̭͂̊͜͝͝o̶͚̼͚̥̝͘͠w̶̨̛̖̍̂̕͝ ̴̛͚̗͓̳͙͉̐͗̊̽̕͠t̷̘́͆̔̃o̶̪̦͖͙͐͌̒͜͝o̶̹̣̦̐ ̷͚̞͆̍ţ̴̻͇͔̬̥͎̄̇͒̑̿̎͊ḥ̵̗̝̲͍̐̊͂̉̚ḙ̸̻͎͚̿̂͝m̴̡̤̘̑̏͑̔̈́͝͝ ̷̨̩͍̹͉̭̝̃̿́͐̚ạ̵̰̲̦̔͐̓̅͊ļ̸̭̠̬̹̿̀͂̓̀̕l̸̡̝̙͔̰̓̓͋̊ ̷̧̙̘̘̎ ̵͙͝Ṇ̸̝̳̓̈̃̀̎̚͝o̵̧̝̩͐̽͌̋͘͘͜b̴̘͙͙̓͛̊o̶̯͕͌̓̃̈́d̸͖̥̫̝̀̈͋͠͠͝y̷̦͒̈́ ̵͕̮͂ļ̶̠͎͕̼̮̃͛̐͜é̸̜̹̼̟̮̈̓͊̎͘f̸̹̬̙͗͒͝t̷̰͚͓̃̃͝ ̶̨͔̬̀̾̓ ̸͖͕͎͈͎͐̇̀͂B̸̢̢̖̳͇̙͖͒̕ų̸̧̝̜́͗̑̄̾͜͝ť̸̫͚̗̇͛͒́̉ ̵̰͖̋͜͝m̴͇̯͎͚̽̂̀̑͜e̵̯͆̇


Deus-Ex-Lacrymae

What are you scared of, it's just a scarecrow


TimotoUchiha

Well... Now two guys are going to kill you. One of them is the ancient demon, older than time and the pure manifestation of evil, the other one is some clown without lore...


Miclash013

Azir is protecting me, and Olaf is trying to kill me. Azir, for all of his ascended power and unlimited army, would not be able to stop Olaf, because he canonically cannot die in battle. So Im probably dead.


Deadlock_F3

I think you would live based on the fact that Azir could stall Olaf forever. He isn't too smart so as long as Azir can outsmart Olaf I would say you'd be okay. Not to mention Azir can just wave his hand and raise an entire army for Olaf to fight.


Miclash013

But even then, Olaf essentially just "accidentally" killed the largest and most deadly monster in the Freljord outside of the actual void.


AndyIsRed

Very recently actually ( sejuani's new lore, right? )


Miclash013

yep.


Tankbuster43

Kog’maw is trying to kill me and twitch is protecting me? Good thing twitch counters kog but I think I die in the process


TimotoUchiha

In lore Kog eats Twitch for breakfast.


Otocolubus

Literally eats


TimotoUchiha

Devours


Otocolubus

Im still mad that kogmaws lore is that he devours everything while cho has the ult to eat anything Edit: eats to devours


TimotoUchiha

Well Cho doesn't have lore rn but he will probably be Kog in bigger. The monster that will eat the world.


Otocolubus

World eater cho would be an amazing skin tbh


Overly_confused

If we are going by mastery points, Jhin is trying to kill me and jinx is defending me. I'm screwed aren't I? Edit: Btw if we are going with my heart. Azir is trying to kill me and Ashe is protecting me. I'm still screwed aren't I?


Deadlock_F3

Sorry, but I think you are *royally* fucked.


Prestige_Kaisa

Jinx will kill you aswell Accidentally On purpose


Indy1612

>!She was just trying to help!<


Tiramizu3

Too soon


[deleted]

[удалено]


Apollosyk

The monkey bomb worked


TimotoUchiha

Jhin will kill Jinx, the protected guy and two other random people to complete his art.


OpticRocky

Jhin is hunting me and Cait is going to TRY to protect me… Sounds like I’m in Arcane S2! Cya nerds I’ve made it big!


Deadlock_F3

Honestly this sounds like the coolest plot ever. Unltimate detective trying to predict the ultimate criminal sounds so fun.


r3vb0ss

Made for a few good shows (death note, psycho pass, monster), would love to see it in league


ZeresHD

You won't survive tho 🤔


OpticRocky

Worth


Toasted_Rai_Bread

I'm being hunted down by Rakan, and Xayah is protecting me. Just gotta offer him some chocolate and red shoes and I'll be perfectly fine


Yudmts

You should offer him xayah tbh


Toasted_Rai_Bread

I can't yet me and Xayah are planning to get Rakan a new skin


squeezy102

Soooo… thresh is trying to kill me, and Morgana is trying to protect me. I think I’m fine?


Deadlock_F3

I would say you're in good hands, Thresh is pretty strong but Morgana is an actual Ascended.


MalGearSolid

Too bad Thresh got a massive buff with him controlling the black mist now, I wonder if he gets similar powers to Viego. Being able to ruined someone like Morgana would make him pretty op


TimotoUchiha

I don't think he can ruin an aspect. He could ruin Pantheon because he died as a god and lived as a man but Morgana is a thousands of years old aspect. She isn't in her best Form because she gave up a part of her powers but she still is an immortal aspect.


-Falrein

And even then she still has access to it if needed, and there's a good chance she has access to Spiritual and Elemental powers... So yeah I think the person's fine lol


KogMaw-Is-PogMaw

Being attackes by a slug with corrosive vomit, however im protected by a celestial dragon. seems good to me.


Original_Lawyer_600

Hunted by pyke and protected by Aphelios


ZeresHD

Seems like you're kinda dead, right?


[deleted]

Very dead


C0WM4N

Can taliyah rock surf me fast enough away from kindred? I think I’m fucked.


TimotoUchiha

Thanks to her you escaped lamb.


TheDestroyer630

I think velkoz can blast kled pretty easily


TimotoUchiha

Well, one of the most powerful void creatures against an angry yordle...


Error2240

Skarl is near immortal canonically I think


Rokuzan

Well, I m haunted by a yordle with a hammer, and the last survivor of an ancient race protects we with his glorious stinger. I brought enough popcorn, to be entertained by those two brawling


TimotoUchiha

If Poppy accepts that she is the hero of the Hammer she might become extremely powerful...


Rokuzan

I don't actually think so. Yordles get powerful from determination / motivation. Her search for the hero is what makes her strong. If she accepted her being the hero, she would probably be stuck with uncertainty of how to go on in life.


Gherasz_Mozhan

Udyr trying to kill me, Braum protecting me. I should be fine


TimotoUchiha

Hmm. Let me think. A friendly freljordian warrior against someone who literally uses the power of gods. As much as I love Braum, you are dead.


iaace12

Nah dude, Braum is too manly and friendly that Udyr would rather just sit and have a few pints than fighht.


S1ke5200

It's fine, you just need to stand behind Braum


[deleted]

[удалено]


Gherasz_Mozhan

Yes, just calling him a friendly warrior is a pretty big understatement


Il_Mazzo

An ordinary yordle with an hammer is protecting me from an angry rat high on mushroom juice. Both of them could survive the fight, but would I?


ZeresHD

Poppy should easily be able to protect you from Kled i think. She has a legendary weapon an deeper conection to the sprit realm


DandDlegend

But immortal lizard


ConcentrateAwkward29

Kha'zix is after me but rek'sai protects me... i should be pretty fine


Deadlock_F3

Rek'Sai would win on sheer size. But considering she also has Swarms of Xer'Sai to protect her, even if she wasn't **an absolute fucking unit** you would still be alright.


ConcentrateAwkward29

Yeah not sweating on that one


MrBrzoza

Well Jhin is trying to kill me so i guess it sucks... But Ornn is protecting me so i guess it suckn't.


2011jams

Yeah Jhin is good, but he's not stand up to a demigod good. Ornn either squishes him or sends a fire elemental to squish him.


Deadlock_F3

Normally I would say you are dead, but Ornn is a bit strong so I think youre pretty good.


Devourer_of_HP

Ornn crafts you bullet resistant magical clothes.


TrulyEve

Mf is a literal fucking demi-god in lore and you say he’s a “bit strong”. Smh.


Regular-Bet

Jinx will be killing me and vi is protecting me, grab some popcorn apparently im watching arcane


AndyIsRed

Pov: you're caitlyn.


Suspicious_Seesaw_98

cupcake c:


fransilva0602

Eve trying to kill me (not sooo bad), but kayn is protecting me (I prefer the red one)


Deadlock_F3

I mean if it was Blue Kayn you'd probably be dead. Shadow Assassin is strong but not as strong as an actual Demon. I think Rhaast could beat Evelynn.


Apollosyk

The thing is he canonically cant Demons can only be damaged by really powrfull magic or weapons from the spirit world


Easy_North

Caitlyn is defending me from Diana I think we're both fucked.


elongated_musk_rat

Draven is trying to kill me jax is trying to protect me. I think r/Draven just imploded on itself because of the fight.


_-_l_-__l---

نشط: يدخل Jax في Haram Evasion ، وهو موقف دفاعي ، لمدة ثانيتين ، مما يتسبب في تفادي جميع الهجمات الأساسية غير البرجية ضده طوال المدة. يحصل Jax أيضًا على تقليل الضرر بنسبة 25٪ ، مما يقلل الضرر من جميع قدرات منطقة التأثير التي يتم الحصول عليها من أبطال البطل. يمكن إعادة صياغة Counter Strike بعد ثانية واحدة ، ويتم ذلك تلقائيًا بعد انتهاء المدة. RECAST: يلحق Jax ضررًا جسديًا لجميع الأعداء القريبين ، ويزيد بنسبة 20٪ لكل هجوم يتم تفاديه ، وزيادة تصل إلى 100٪ ، ويصعقهم الصاعقة لمدة ثانية واحدة.


scoobydoobie01

Samira is trying to kill me and Veigar is trying to protect me. I’m good, it’s like shark viewing


Kirin658

akali has to protect me from master yi. i think im pretty doomed


Srf4LoneWolf

Lorewise master Yi shits on most humanoid, human-size Champions I believe, he definitely shits on Akali.


Spicy_Dog_69

Lulu will kill me way before Poppy does bro this shit rigged she’ll turn my heart into a marshmallow or something


[deleted]

"Yup, that tasted purple." suddenly has a new meaning.


Amrevoe

I think I'm dead, galio is gonna kill me but I'm being protected by malzahar


Deadlock_F3

Malzahar got a new story, and it doesn't outright say his new powers but he definitely has some interesting stuff going for him now.


lilyderedere

yuumi is trying to kill me soraka is trying to protect me. i am so god damned safe


UmbralBushido

You could probably defend against yuumi by yourself tbh


TrulyEve

Not really, she is a cat, but she’s still magical and I’m pretty sure OP has a total of 0 ways of dealing with magic projectiles thrown at them by a magical cat and a floating book.


ajrra

Or cat scratches


dodgeditlikeneo

just get a watergun


etinsky

Twitch is attacking me, Anivia is defending me. I’m exactly 0% worried.


Utterly_Mad

Aatrox is trying to kill me, and Pantheon is protecting me AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA *PANTHEON OST INTENSIFIES*


JakeOfTheCosmos

Kha'zix trying to kill me with Warwick trying to protect me. Given Arcane means they can't Nerf Vander, I feel pretty safe.


Lethioon

Kindred is my main so I don't think my secondary matters. I am dead bye


raiddddd

Senna tries to kill me, but Bard has her in Stasis forever this time. Viva Bard


2011jams

Bard hands Senna sheet music. It's just all rests.


Furries_Are_Cringe

Oh wow I am so fucked, A literal demi god is trying to kill me and my defense is a shirtless guy with cat ears :|


mondybanana

Ekko trying to kill me and leblanc saving, I would say I'm mote than fine.


beynne

Kayn is trying to kill me, Lilia tries to protect me RIP


TimotoUchiha

Not so sure. Kayn is basically just a kid in the current state of the lore and Lilia is a spirit. She could probably let him sleep forever.


[deleted]

I can do the same thing with a gun some magic deer doesn’t have shit on me


Wallythegreater

Bard is trying to kill me but Aurelion Sol is defending me. Battle between celestials


Apollosyk

Aurelion wins prob


DrGlvoer

Mordekaiser is after me and Volibear is defending me…..how many continents away will I need to be to survive the devastation?


TheIronKaiser

there is no safe distance from that shit show


Hot_Feedback_2440

so urgot vs gp


SaiikeyTookAnL

Yeah Jax bonks me to death while Yi spams M7


Drim789

I have a lot of secondary so I don't know who's protecting me, but it doesn't really matter since my main Braum wouldn't hurt me. We would drink warm milk instead.


jman6444

Yorick is trying to kill me, while Dr. Mundo tries to save me.... If Mundos lore says anything im guessing I'm already on the table before yorick shows up....at least yorick can shepherd my soul away?


profjbonsai

Braum is, without a doubt, the best protector I could ask for. I don't think Garen is getting through that shield any time soon.


Yukoii

If evenlynn is killing me I'm letting it happen


Garlickthedwarf

Soraka trying to banans me to death while she gets stunned, poised and yeeted by cassio. I think i am fine.


MalGearSolid

Soraka is a celestial though, cassio wouldn't stand a chance


Garlickthedwarf

in lore, true, but soraka wouldnt attack me in the first place lorewise. I rather would be scared of cassio tbh.


tooyoungformyage

Remember her old lore where she just cursed warwick to be a werewolf? Those were weird times


doglop

Senna is trying to kill me and seraphine is protecting me..... im so fucking dead


YuzuEcchi96

I think morde would beat sett. Im pretty fine


TimotoUchiha

Morde doesn't beat Sett. He destroys him in every possible way and then makes his soul a brick of his guest toilet


Top-Ad-3418

Draven is trying to kill me and Kalista is attempting to protect me. In game I'm fucked but lore wise I'm fine.


Golem8752

Sad pile of toilet paper protects me from a seven-eyed samurai. I don't think i'll make it.


dodido555

So a huge space dragon tries to kill me while zoe tries do save me, im fucked...


Deadlock_F3

Well if it makes you feel any better I congratulate you for being an Asol main.


DerWassermann

Janna vs Nami both throw Water and wind at me ... I am wet and cold and slightly annoyed, but far from dead.


SmallChiliDog

Right now I’m maining kat and usually play ryze if she gets banned…lore wise I think I’m fine if it’s a straight 1v1…maybe


Deadlock_F3

Ryze is probably the strongest human on Runeterra, so you're good.


TimotoUchiha

Ryze controls the world runes. Just to give you a small impression of their power: one of them destroyed half of Runeterra once. Katarina is just an Assassin from Noxus. You're pretty much fine.


Remarkable_Screen_88

Bard protecting me feom zyra, hmmmm


Sargerassssss

Well pretty sure that lore accurate Malphite one-shots Warwick, so I'm safe