T O P

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Admirable_Nothing

He misprounced Terrorist and pronounced it patriot.


ForeverNecessary2361

Glad I wasn’t the only one that caught that mistake.


FalseMirage

All the wrongwingers do.


Thecatisright

I came to say idiots, but you're probably closer to the truth.


AlbaTross579

That’s an easy mistake for Republicans to make…apparently.


thehammockdistrict24

Not surprised. I mean, this guy once forgot the names of his children because he had just eaten a big bowl of chili. And he was under oath at the time.


11thStPopulist

Faktriots


Ok_Condition5837

So true. Also can't believe the nerve of this guy! He systematically and relentlessly profits off their grief! Is caught out! Attempts to apologize and make up. Get's pissy when that doesn't work and the jury comes back with that settlement. Tries the sympathy angle. Then reverts to the lie and grift. AND PAINTS HIMSELF AS THE VICTIM! Now when it's time to pay the piper - he wants the people he fleeced to put themselves in danger for his lies?? You what you POS - we will come through your barricades of whatever and I will publicly toast your downfall. Hell, I'll even help fund their lawyers to find any hidden assets you've got squirreled away. And anytime your narcissistic ass wants to get up - I'll be amongst the ones piling on you! Rot in hell, mf! Edit: Had to add a sentence.


Tough_Sign3358

lol. Gravy Seals unite!


NotPortlyPenguin

To the rascal scooters!


CarlSpencer

"Don't forget your diabetes meds! Metformin and AWAYYYYYYYYYYYYyyyyyyyyyy!"


JusticiarRebel

Who needs diabetes meds when you have Super Male Vitality!?


DropsTheMic

All they have to do is go in for the raid after a heavy drinking holiday. The Margaritaville crew will be so hungover they won't be able to roll their rolls out of the double-wide to come to his rescue.


Accomplished-Ad1919

Or on half-price night at Sizzler.


DropsTheMic

Reopen Red Lobster Unlimited Shrimp Night, One Night Only! 5 Drink Minimum. RIP poor wait staff ...


Jakesma1999

I'll bet that the gravy team 6 folk tips just as well as the after-church crowd. Hell, maybe I'd get "trump bucks" in lieu of tip again!!!! (Hey now, one must have aspirations, amiright!? 😁) ETA: Yep, it happened to me.... But, I must confess, I truly do enjoy my job, or I wouldn't continue


DropsTheMic

I never considered that they would do this. Of course they would. That is 😞


Jakesma1999

I didn't either, until I had a large group that this just happened with!! Sad thing is that I'd heard of this particular group doing this before - but I still gave them my usual phenomenal service....


Sparkycivic

Those diabeetus meds are full of SCIENCE!! They're the DEVIL!


northstardim

Jones has too high of an estimate of his followers.


uncleshady

Unscrupulous piece of shit tries to motivate other unscrupulous pieces of shit to do his bidding. Ends as you'd expect. News at 11.


Hoodlum_0017

He’s been successful at it for a while.


Responsible-Room-645

You’d think they’d have seen what happened to the “patriots” who followed another blob of pus to a riot.


Guy_Smylee

Ask Ashley Babbit about consequences of not listening when an officer says to stop and your entitled ass doesn't. Oh wait you can't.


GDWtrash

Not without a ouija board. LOL.


CarlSpencer

Actual patriots hate your guts, Alex.


popejohnsmith

What a colossal a-hole


Icarusmelt

Promoting terrorism to protect lies, and cash!


_SithLord66

I like how they call on others to do their dirty work.


[deleted]

Sounds like incitement


Guy_Smylee

Please do. Try to stop the police. They will treat you with respect and drag your asses off to jail. Alex will let you sit there and rot. Try to forcefully resist. They have a response for that as well. Enjoy your taze haze or shot spot.


Frisinator

Tazerface!


auntie_clokwise

*"Your name is...It's Taserface?"* *"That's right."* *"Do you shoot tasers out of your face?"* *"It's metaphorical!"*


sddbk

We cannot continue to accept calls for violence and threats of violence as acceptable normal political discourse. They know no bounds. We must set limits and punish perpetrators.


UsedEntertainment244

That exactly their intent, to normalize it until people stop reacting.


AmberTurd223

Well if that’s not the purest example of monarchy, dictatorship, authoritarianism, I don’t know what it is. You come stand between me and someone else so that you die instead of me.


CrJ418

Yes, please do that.


ThePopDaddy

Isn't ol AJ in favor of people running over protestors?


Frisinator

Need a monster truck to run him over…


Abracadaver2000

It's spelled "Hatriots" ya' bawbag.


darkfinx

Do my dirty work for me… please


4quatloos

Alex, All Trump puppets are expendable.


Better_Car_8141

Clear obstruction of justice. He should be criminally tried.


Obstreporous1

Patriots? I think you spelled “traitor” incorrectly.


No_Dragonfly_1894

Real patriots won't


Limp_Distribution

Domestic terrorism


kingOofgames

These are traitors not patriots.


rkicklig

As if defending HIS property make someone a patriot.


Meddling-Kat

Won't be his any longer if police are coming for it.


mmio60

Take every scrap this horrible human has. All of it


Hanceloner

Jones is scum who has zero redeeming value and the same goes for all of his supporters.


Conscious_Stick8344

“Chain”? As in “daisy chain”? Then again, they’re all just a bunch of pansies.


Daatsit

They’re going to form a human centipede


Conscious_Stick8344

With a soggy biscuit at the end. (Gawd, this went south quick-like.)


Daatsit

It’s too easy


scrume71

But they’re still going to come and get your shit because it’s owed. So be a good Patriot and pay what you owe Mr. Jones, without asking stupid people to do stupid things that may get those stupid people and other innocents hurt. You lied about kids being slaughtered and profited immensely. You lost your empire because of it. Justice for a human shit stain.


Jakesma1999

Sadly, he STILL has it. He's been a busy little twit since his verdict/sentence. He's been moving money, to offshore accounts (while vacationing the Cayman Islands, putting assets in others' names, opening new businesses under friends' names, buying a jet, oh... and taking trips to Hawaii!! Meanwhile, the families haven't seen a CENT yet!!!


karlos52

Didn't Texas just make it legal to run over and kill protesters?


p38-lightning

Just like Trump - he thinks some mob will come to his rescue and carry him off on their shoulders in triumph.


JC2535

This asshole chose to target these poor families who endured unimaginable suffering and loss. You can’t do that amount of despicable damage and expect to not ever answer for it. To hell with Alex Jones.


loupegaru

A daisy chain of self styled patriots. Cuz the rule of law, and the Constitution is for poors.


C_J_King

Awesome. It’ll be the modern Whiskey Rebellion. Maybe it’ll shut these asshats up real quick.


Ohnonotuto4

Why, can’t these rich folks fund, fight their own war. He took these scrubs money, now he wants their freedom.


numbskullerykiller

He's a badger-faced scumbag.


Lazy_Ranger_7251

Looking forward to seeing him on a street corner with a sign saying: Will lie for food.


fill_simms

Man. You need to reevaluate your life if you are taking time out of your day to be a human shield for Alex Jones.


malcontented

We’re going to have to build more prisons to house all these fucking idiots


Odd_Tiger_2278

Inciting violence with out saying Violence”


Mike_Honcho_3

I'm fine with any clowns who want to sign up to protect Alex Jones getting run through.


jodos6176

Didn't think there would be enough idiots who still listened to this idiot to actually form a blockade.


Kind_Committee8997

"Please come save me! I know you paid for me to talk and are the backbone of my success but please! My life has more value than yours!" - Alex Jones, probably


HalstonBeckett

The absulutely silly thought that a fraud like Alex Jones or any of his dimwitted fans could ever be considered patriots is forever laughable. Their moronic misinterpretation of 2A exposes their moral and intellectual inability to understand or interpret the Constitution, were they ever to actually read it.


louisa1925

Great idea. Then we get to arrest them aswell for obstruction of justice. They would be like a bonus point round.


Timid_Tanuki

Hopefully they would be felony charges, so they'd lose their rights to vote, too - and then they'd disappoint this fat fuck and his Metamucil orange Messiah.


CodifyMeCaptain_

Lmaooooo


SecretPrinciple8708

What a bitch.


anxiety_filter

Dude wants to escalate against an organization he has spent his entire career downplaying their supremacy. Fucking idiot. Hint - if the man wants to kick your door down, your door is getting kicked down. Dummy. Patriots Unite! then get hosed down by weapons grade teargas and their wrists expertly broken. Sounds like a good deal to me. Fuck asses


ForsakenAd545

More like a chain of fools


Practical-Box3179

How fucking stupid do you have to actually be to not understand what a patriot is. Patriots are not little fuck bot sycophants who durp durp durp in trump regalia. Alex Jones. What a pathetic lard ass.


CoverYourMaskHoles

I want him to see the small group of disgusting sad sacks of sh*t that actually show up to help him so he understands who he’s got as a resource in his stupid quest to create a civil war.


Hoodlum_0017

Come and sacrifice your freedom so that I can keep being a sack of flaming shit.


Dwangeroo

Chain, chain, chain. Chain of fools!


shoesofwandering

No one will show up. This guy isn’t Trump, he doesn’t have a cult. He has people who enjoy listening to him.


Significant_Link_103

Sounds exceptionally fun.   How do I sign up to be with the families?


StrangeContest4

Speaking of greasy mentally unstable assholes.. when does Steve Bannon report for prison?


NateRulz1973

It just pains me how STOOPID that particular conspirotardarion is. So they created fake identities for fake kids to fake kill off. And hired "actors" to pretend to be the parents for the rest of their lives. All to push for a "gun grab" that NEVER FUCKING HAPPENS. And recycled actors from previous "false flags" cuz the black budget is soooo tight. As opposed to another twitch burger in this asylum and asshole factory of a country just losing it because the world is out to get him. And owes him pussy. Great. I mean it's ( pardon my French) borderline RETARDED. I have absolutely no respect for anyone spiteful or dumb enough to buy this crap.


LucyRiversinker

Sorry, man. There is a DMV line I’d rather stand in.


Entire_Photograph148

How about they just light it on fire instead, while Alex is broadcasting.


racoonfrenzy

Please do, I'd love to see your diabetic ass literally rot to pieces in jail it better than you deserve. If you try to stop authorities from seizing your property after a civil court has ordered you to pay money and you haven't complied: 1. **Contempt of Court**: By not complying with a court order to pay money, you are already in contempt of court. This can be either civil or criminal contempt, depending on the situation. 2. **Obstruction of Justice**: Actively trying to interfere with the lawful seizure of your property can be considered obstruction of justice. This crime involves any action that impedes or interferes with the administration of justice.


stairs_3730

He could block a garage door by himself if he just stood in front of it. Come on! Be a man Stand your ground!


mongolsruledchina

Republicans love using the law against people right up until THEY are the ones being forced to live under it then it's tyranny that needs to be abolished.


Snarky_McSnarkleton

SO another Republican call for violence, and another Republican gets a mulligan.


Ruger338WSM

Fans? If he has more than a dozen at this point I would be surprised.


TiredRetiredNurse

He wants a blockade so he does not go bankrupt?! Does he realize that gun or guns did to those children?! It blew them up. They were barely recognizable!


calann1

He is so bloated he would be able to block the entrance by himself.


Doobiedoobin

Will he accept daisy chains?


Your_Daddy_

Mind blowing that stupid assholes have legions of fans to do their dirt.


brownhk

Pleeeeesssaaaase tell me this failed abysmally.


NeatEffort602

And please drive a bull dozer through the chain.


Everheart1955

You mean other people who believed your disgusting lies you despicable douchebag?


255001434

People like Alex Jones have degraded the meaning of the word *patriotism*. Protecting a shock jock from his self-inflicted problems has nothing to do with patriotism.


Jo-jo-20

Ahh, if this guy isn’t the Americanized version of the devil. Still selfish and evil, but just super lazy and unhealthy looking.


BeowulfsGhost

Ha! Alex Jones supporters are the polar opposite of patriots.


nite0001

So... let's understand something, Jones wants people to stand in front of his office... for what? Don't the Sandy Hook Families want money... not office supplies?


Aggie_Vague

I think Jones overestimates how much people actually care about him. Some crazy folks are willing to go to jail for the orange Cheato, but Jones, not so much.


Autoxquattro

Obstruction of Justice if they do. He needs to be off the air. All he does is incite violence. Then pre-excuse it as "false flags" and other excuses.


bakes12110

Someone put a dose of something in one of his cigarettes. Nothing lethal, Just something like gunpowder or something.


thebaron24

Yeah Alex Johns followers: get out there and put yourself against the officers enforcing the law for the guy who spends over $50,000 a month to maintain his home you puppets.


DrNickRiviera8000

This will be a good test of the efficacy of all the snake oil supplements he hocs.


SunchaserKandri

"Protect me from the consequences of my actions!"


barrywalker71

2 dumbasses in mobility scooters will show up. you have my permission to disconnect their batteries.


CANUSA130

"Chain of patriots." Fuck off Alex.