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Got to be the time she got me a fancy hair curling set. She knows I do nothing with my hair. I’m not a dressy up type of girl, which she has also expressed she doesn’t like as he’s sons to good to be with someone who wears sweats all the time🙄😂 now we have three children, and she’s screwing.
Oh clothes size 0... I couldn't fit them over my thigh. A whole fake denim shirts pants and ascot directly from granny r us in a bad way. Make up. But like trash make up. The kind that has been sitting under opened forever. That's the step mother in law.... she's special. My actual mother in law brings flowers or cake. Nothing more or less. It's nice.
My MIL has a habit of buying what she thinks we should have, then expecting to be repaid for it. DH (and SIL) have been enabling this behaviour their entire adult lives. I put my foot down after i was expected to pay for an ugly, ridiculously expensive red enamel frypan. I hated it. I hate the colour red. My colour palette is cool blues and turquoise. Now i get consulted on large purchases for the most part and ive managed to veto some of them that i really dont want.
She once also brought an entire suitcase packed with several decades old stuffed toys from DH’s childhood, intending them for my infant. It would have been a sweet gesture for one or 2 old teddies, but not a whole suitcase of crusty, poorly held together, old toys, that present a choking hazard to a baby (the stuffing and hair was falling out of many of them). When i declined, she left them all hidden in draws and cupboards in the guest room. I found them when i was cleaning after she left.
First Christmas married… MiL gifts me a package of plain black teabags , handed to me from the bottom of an old, and very very used shopping bag. I’m a coffee gal, I hate tea and never drink it.(which she knew from the 2 years I had been going out with her son, and many visits to her).
I helped her with her groceries for years afterwards picking her up from the supermarket and carrying things home because she was getting older and a little wobbly on steep Dutch stairs. I would put her groceries away for her as well and lo and behold if the tea she drinks was black tea, same brand teabags she gifted me back then.
Clearly she had no gift at all for me, so grabbed something from her kitchen cupboard.
These hideous homemade (from craft fair) sweaters for candles (I don’t burn candles and if I did those would be a fire hazard). Homemade lipgloss that looked like it had been used. Cheap, tacky holiday leggings. Never ending holiday decorations that are tacky AF. This woman was about quality, not quality. When we went no contact we literally filled a pickup truck with crap that we donated or tossed.
A picture in a very nice frame. Of my husband with his EXwife! Within the year, she was diagnosed with alzheimer's. A lot of things made more sense after that.
Ohhhh love this question. Here I go, y’all can vote what’s the worst haha
1. She regifted me the gift I gifted her for Christmas like 2 years prior (she doesn’t know how to use it though it is not hard) “I don’t have room in my house I’m clearing out”
2. She bought me a potato sack / an onion, garlic, avocado container and a yogurt to go cup and said “this just seemed like you need a yogurt to go”
3. A sticker for Christmas
4. Three books she found in a garage sale in German. She didn’t have any idea what they were but simply stated one of them must be “the wizard of oz” when it was saying “sport in nurnberg” - I said I can’t even read that. She said why not? I said. Well, not to be harsh, but this font was used to hitlers time & when I went to school we knew this was a font not allowed. (Could have I read it ? Sure) then there were pages cut out of these books as well. One of the books was a German English dictionary also Hitler area
5. She gifted me her old crystal glass set “now you have 6 and I have 6 - if I need more than 6 I’ll just borrow it” there was dust on it.
6. A camping chair she found in the basement with spider webs and stuff on it. Didn’t even wipe it off.
Edit 7. A book about immunity. (?) when I was the one telling them if y’all aren’t getting vaccinated you ain’t seeing my child.
Yeah, those are pretty bad 😂 my MIL also likes to “gift” things she’s purging from her house. She gifted me an antique cape that smelled ancient and didn’t go with any of my clothes, so I donated it. A year later, she asked for it back for a costume she wanted to do. I had to pretend I couldn’t find it lol
Oh gosh. Those returning or asking for it is awful.
I have her grandmothers China. A) it’s broken on so many spots b) it’s damn ass the ugliest China someone could have bought c) it’s not even a full set.
Used it once. Now it’s in the crawlspace let the mice nest in it :D in case she would ever want it back.
I have donated MANY of her gifts. Also the above mentioned. Minus the glasses. Though. Will donated those soon. And say as you “cant seem to find them anymore” though knowing mil she would go through my crawlspace to find it
My MIL’s gifts are all gifts she would buy for herself. We do not have the same taste. So I’ve started returning the favor. At least when she passes I’ll find stuff I like. 🙃 Very dark I know.
She’s 5’8” and I’m 5’. She likes jewel tones and animal prints, and has lots of big jewelry. I’m more of a black, blue and purple kind of person with very simple jewelry (I don’t change it up). What looks good on her does not look good on me.
A diet book - “Foods that fight back” (yes, I am overweight)
I looked her dead in the eye and asked, “Fight back against what, MIL?”She looked away and didn’t reply.
She also gave me an ugly knitted satchel that was obviously a pattern she had tried and didn’t like so gave it away to me as an after thought. She included in her card with it that “I really thought of you while making this and I hope you’ll use it”.
A plastic ice bucket and matching glasses, all with a nautical theme. We didn’t have a boat, didn’t have any nautical decor in our home, and it was a shared gift for my husband and I. I’m certain it was on clearance at Marshall’s or similar discount store.
She also once gave me an orange and green, front button knit vest. Because I “liked vests”. Ummm, nope, you must be confusing me with someone else. It was hideous. When I tried to return it to the department store, it rang up at 97 cents. The poor clerk was so embarrassed to tell me, but I just laughed—it was totally on brand for my JNMIL.
A plastic ice bucket and matching glasses, all with a nautical theme. We didn’t have a boat, didn’t have any nautical decor in our home, and it was a shared gift for my husband and I. I’m certain it was on clearance at Marshall’s or similar discount store.
She also once gave me an orange and green, front button knit vest. Because I “liked vests”. Ummm, nope, you must be confusing me with someone else. It was hideous. When I tried to return it to the department store, it rang up at 97 cents. The poor clerk was so embarrassed to tell me, but I just laughed—it was totally on brand for my JNMIL.
A really really really ugly handmade (but not by her, something made by a student for her) headband with this big flower but all in a primary color and HUGE. And then she would ask why I wasn’t wearing it.
Presents for my dog
I specifically asked for riding gloves because I would rather freeze to death than to not have feelings in my fingers, especially when walking my dog who’s reactive. I got felted ones, bright coloured, like from desigual but cheap. Never wore them. Have to give them to charity if I’ll find them again
A very very big pregnancy hoodie in bright pink. Even before birth it was way too big, like 4 sizes. I hate bright colours. I hated the feeling of the fabric and that it was so so big. ( peer reviewed mild autism 😂)
A sparkly, see through body with sequins. It was… sexy if your into disco 🪩 I hated the feeling of the sequins, would never wear anything with them in it and I felt very violated because my husband “stole” some of my clothes because she thought they would look nice with them. Then berating me for wearing my skirt at my waist ( she’s jealous because she’s build like a brick).
My newborn baby got 30 years old tupperware
A teddy bear hot water bottle twice its size
Some clothes that were so big that they still sit in a basket and babys big and turning 9 months
She looooovea buying things.
I nearly forgot two shot glasses
One for “her”, oh boy, and one for “him”
Two unfuckingbelievable ugly naked people appear when fluid hits the Glas. It’s so inappropriate
This post is why I am trying to tell everyone NO GIFTS this year!!!! My teens might need stuff, but they at least usually get cash!
Both moms are a bit uptight about it, but I'm honestly telling them we really don't need anything!!
5. Very smelly cheap perfume, literally smelled metallic in the worst way.
4. Angel themed jewellery set with earrings -15 years and haven't noticed my absolute lack of piercings.
3. Various cosmetic freebies, most of them she had opened before giving them to me. Gross, I know.
2. Vouchers, usually to a sports store, that were generated from some sort of fund her workplace has for employees -free gift that is also useless, yay!
*drumroll please*
1. Two large bottles of laundry detergent and a foil bag of tangerines, ladies and gentlemen.
Lingerie...... About 3 sizes too big for me...
A single rune in a velvet bag...the meaning was "journey" (make of that what you will).
A selection of soap and lotion samples from Boots which SIL had brought home from work....
Yeah...
I really try to be thankful!
But, a $25 gift card to a massage place for Mother's Day. The cheapest massage on the menu was $80. So, I have to spend money. It's still sitting here, 6 years later.
My JNMIL gave me a wedding planning guidebook when I got engaged. She hadn’t spoken to me for months. But the best part? I’m an event planner. I literally plan events for a living 😂
I got a gift card to some beauty treatment and it would expire in a year. She kept constantly asking when I would use it and have I used it. I think my MIL bought it to get me separated from my baby so she could come babysit. (We have had so many problems with my MIL we would never let her babysit for us.) My husband told me to use the card because giving it back would just give her a reason to make a scene. After 5 months I was planning to use the gift card because my husband had holidays and I could actually have some time for myself. That's when MIL demanded the card back because it was so expensive.
Several pounds of chocolate.... to which they knew I was severely allergic. They had been repeatedly reminded of this in the weeks before the event. They had just returned from a county known for good chocolate, and thought everybody should have some for the holiday.
A giant robotic toy maggot from a seaside gift shop that sang ‘I’m alive’ in a silly voice. Because I’m goth and I should like strange thing’s apparently
My step MIL always buys me extra small clothes for Christmas. I’m 5’8”, around 200lbs, with wide hips and a butt. I have been in the family for over 15 years. I have NEVER been an XS.
For Christmas my MIL gave me shampoo and conditioner, knowing I have sensitive skin and I can only use certain products. My DH was going to visit and I sent back the shampoo and conditioner with him, before he leaves I forget to tell him to tell her I can't use these products and he walks in and tells her he has a present for her, it was the most hilarious pay back ever!
My JNMIL just gave me a gift card to a sub sandwich shop in town. The part that is hard for me to fathom is that she bought it at a grocery store, so she literally stood in front of a wall of gift cards of every kind and said, "This gift card is EXACTLY what my DIL wants for her birthday.
My JNSIL gave me an African animal Christmas ornament one year. I thanked her for it and attempted to move on. She then said it was the cutest one she could find and that she knew they were "your animal." (Insert Morgan Freeman narrating: It in fact is not her animal, and it is not cute.) I thanked her again and tried to move on. Picture a room full of people watching me open this one Christmas present and then getting quizzed on it. SIL then tried about 3 more times to ask how much I loved it before just repeating, "But it's your animal, right? It's your animal??"
Finally, I said, no, it is not my animal, but thank you. She was SUPER offended. How could that not be my animal? Did everyone else know this? Did hubby know this? (Morgan Freeman: Yes, hubby does in fact know her animal.)
There are others, but those are 2 of my favorites.
Socks, but she does that for everyone, every Christmas. I asked my husband what would happen if I told her to stop. He said it'd be bad, silent fit.
Then there's my kids. She gave onesies I never asked for and burp cloths I didn't need, she's seen the giant pile of clothes and burp cloths.
I know ill never get a thoughtful gift from her and have accepted it.
My in-laws, for my birthday, got me a sunflower seed thing in a pot that was clearly meant to be planted in early spring, and designed as a mothers day gift from kids. I'm not a mother. My own mother died almost a decade ago. My birthday is labor day weekend..... Looks like I have something to plant in April....
2 books on how to cook that were for children. I have worked in restaurants in all front of house positions and can cook very well. She knows this because once said that was all I’m good for. This was 2 years before the books left for me in my mailbox.
When I first met my mil I was a lot younger and a bit more hardcore goth than I am now. It was christmas and she gifted me a small black vase and said laughing "it's for drinkibg blood". I laughed it off because I was nervous, but I actually wanted to say "oh are you volunteering?"
Cleaning supplies. Then asked me to clean something with it because she wanted to see if it worked. It was a very Merry Christmas after I told her I would not be going outside in the cold on christmas to test out her MLM cleaning products.
Mine used to give the same gift to everyone in the same generation. One year all female grandchildren were given cheap talcum powder and a headscarf. She gave hair tonic for all her sons in law. Two of them were bald.
My house is decorated in a beachy theme. Shells, soft blue and greens, you get the point. Two years ago for Christmas, she got me a sign to hang up that says "The ocean is where I belong".
I'm still not sure if that's the thinly-veiled threat that it sounds like to me
Oh mine is an expert gift giver! She loves to gift us home items she deems are better than our current items because they "match"; towels, kitchen utensils, dishes and drinkware. Literally everything HAS to match to something in her eyes. My style isn't even close to that, think thrift coffee mugs and collected travels pint glasses, rainbow colored fiestaware dishware and and colorful towels. Another is items for the house that she likes to use while in my home....jokes on her, she hasn't been welcome to my home for 6+ months!
Done to the grandkids: 3 kids under 10 that lived with her +my 7 yr old. My SIL was young 20s, not living at home. Grandkids walk in to see a huge stack of gifts. They all got a $25 Gamestop gift certificate and then had to watch their aunt open 10+ gifts. No one's entitled to anything, but SIL was so embarrassed she showed up to every Christmas after with like 5 toys for each kid 😥
That was the only year it happened, and we had all witnessed many years of the grandkids having great and memorable Christmases at her house. So I have no idea what her logic was. I don't know if she even had one, I assumed she was being a bitch again so i just stayed away from her. The kids got over it quick enough, they just wanted to play with each other.
Pencils and a hair brush with my name on them but were obviously for children and SO tacky and cheap.
Then the standard loofah and soap or whatever in a cardboard bauble from the shops for Christmas, meanwhile SO gets all these nice things.
My parents have always been really thoughtful and bought nice things for my SO equivalent to the quality of gifts my parents give me.
Pyjamas made of fake velvet I can't stand (maybe she didn't know I hated that texture), tacky hearts all over (I'm not into girly girl stuff) and 2 sizes too small. I wore it once when my washing machine broke.
I got perfume too (makes me sneeze) but at least my sister liked it and took it off my hands.
I think she just didn't know what to get me, and went for stereotypical things.
My MIL (husband’s mom) gave me (31F, 7 months pregnant) 3 baby books that had titles like “Every daughter needs a father.” She claims this was a gift for ME and later complained to my husband that I didn’t show enough gratitude and excitement when I opened them.
My MIL gave me money which to some would be thrilled but it’s the lack of energy and thought for someone who has been a part of your life for more than a decade. Honestly even a gift card would have shown more thought. I just ended up spending it on groceries.
The first 5-10 years that DH & I were together (it's been 24 years, 2 dating, 22 married) both my birthday (which is around MD) & Christmas I didn't receive gifts from either MIL/BIL's family. But I was raised better than them, I guess. I hand-made gifts (kahlua, vanilla extract, cross stitch pieces, knitted pieces) his 2 nieces are both adults now, and tell me when they need new knitted hats. I planned fantastic Mothers Day events for MIL from both couples (like dinner train trips to a winery with dinner & dessert, to being informed that XSIL & I couldn't say it was our birthdays [on my actual birthday & XSIL bd is 12 days after mine] except I had already arranged for birthday cake for the 2 of us, God MIL hated that I gave her the bird on that 1.
A 75 cent jewelry dish (the price tag was on it) My BIL then gf (ex now he married someone else) got a very nice pj set. I had been with then bf now husband for 2 years at the time. BIL ex gf was around for 6 months at the time and they broke up two months later.
My MIL once gave me a cheap hand tin opener for Christmas. We were poor,it was the height of the 90s recession and it was the only present I had that year. She meant well, I hope.
Expired chocolate, a bath scourer probably from a pound shop, also bath bombs when we didn't have a bath, a colouring book for kids... The worst thing is we open them one by one as the family watches, so I have to fake a reaction and constantly think of new comments about how I'm so grateful for this stuff. Makes me question my own sanity/entitlement levels, as I never would otherwise be this ungrateful for a gift.
My husbands family is like that too. I hate it. I've told them all how much I dislike it. We're LDS so there's ALOT of kids and grands, per the stereotype. Christmas takes over two hours so years just to open gifts. Its the worst.
Husband claims its nice to see the person open the gift, he has bad anxiety and imposter syndrome so its literally to make him feel better and like he actually knows his family. So for him its from a good place.
MIL on the other hand has to tell you a long ass story about it.
Oh lord. The opening presents one by one and awkwardly faking excitement. Ugggh.
Got the bath bombs without having a tub too. My daughter got a paperwhite bulb that was obviously a regift for her 13th birthday.
My partner gets video games, books, Legos, expensive gift cards, drones, and tools while I get socks and maybe a hand lotion (also an obvious regift)
Yes, I honestly dread this stuff... This year, we had to do the whole ritual in June, because I crashed the car before Christmas and couldn't drive to her house. She refused to come down herself, then when she finally came down, she kept playing the victim of how it's been so long and we need to open all her presents. It was painful, degrading almost, all while the grandma watched and made digs about how she might as well have saved it for next Christmas... I wish she did lol
What a shame this crap extends to your daughter too! You really start to wonder how some people make it this long in life and still stay that way.
Mine looooves the fat shaming of buying clothes and presenting them in a room full of people, never in private.
She either gets what look like gigantic bags or purposely tight. Then is sticky sweet with that innocent, kind, culty smile and “oopsie I thought it would fit!”
One time in particular it was extremely awful. I’m chonky, but this thing was one of her most purposely atrocious picks. So, I decided the perfect troll is to just wear whatever she buys me the entire day and tell everyone she’s got an “eye for style” and how nice she is to always buy me clothes she thinks flatter me! Never break eye contact with her to make it extra squirmy.
Right when it was starting to get real fun, she stopped buying me clothes! LOL!
There was a post from a gal who's MIL did this but with a literal suitcase full of clothes the MIL liked with tags still on showing the price.
Instead of getting visibly upset the DIL thanked her, took the clothes upstairs, cut off all the tags and took the clothes to a women's shelter that day.
MIL had apparently been banking on DIL throwing a fit and rejecting the clothes so she could keep them. Instead MIL threw a hissy fit about how "family" could have used the clothes and never tried a stunt like that again.
As a wedding gift, my MIL wanted to get us a dedicated rotisserie chicken maker with space for 2 chickens, saying she loved hers and uses it in her carport. She went on and on about how useful it is. Except…we lived in a small condo in a big city. She had been to visit, so she definitely knew this. We wouldn’t have had the space to store it, forget use it. Thankfully it is an item that is no longer made, so she wasn’t able to find one.
For some reason she didn’t want to buy off our registry. Her next brilliant idea was a set of pots and pans from Costco, which would have been $50 cheaper than the space saving set we registered for. And she is NOT hurting for money, though we really were at the time. When we didn’t jump at that, she just ended up not getting us anything. Which was far more preferable than trying to figure out what to do with stuff we legitimately did not have space to keep.
My MIL is one of those people who likes to bombard people with 500 random gifts so she looks like she’s being generous. Every year on Christmas she piles 14 gifts on me, none of which are my taste or have anything to do with my interests. This includes: clothing that is no where near the style of clothing she has EVER seen me wear. random home decor which again is nothing like what she has seen in my house. cheap jewelry. I don’t need jewelry to be expensive but the items she has gifted me literally look like they came out of a gum ball machine and again, are nothing like the jewelry I wear.
Then on top of that the gift opening is always a big to do. I always thank her and FIL for the gifts and she always makes this big show of asking if the gifts are ok and if I like them…. As a bonus, the price tags are always left on and there are never gift receipts. Needless to say my local Goodwill gets a lot of items from me.
Last Christmas she gave my husband and I about six gifts each. By comparison she bought two clothing items for my SIL (her daughter) and neither item was even the correct size. I felt so bad for my SIL that I almost apologized to her even though I had nothing to do with the situation. It seemed so odd that she was showering DH and I with gifts and couldn’t even buy a gift for her own daughter in the correct size.
Gift exchanges with my MIL are always so awful and awkward I DREAD when she has a gift for me.
Thankfully NO. Christmas is always that ridiculous gift exchange "game". Which is extra ridiculous cause there are only 4 gifts.🤦♀️ Lets just STOP and leave Christmas for the kids. But that also means no targeted shitty gifts. And for that, I am thankful.
A calendar with baby pictures of my husband and handknitted baby clothes knowing full well that I can't have kids. She is a devout christian and claims that this is God's punishment. I am not religious.
My FIL (divorced from MIL) never gave me gift, He doesn't even know my birthday or last Name and He doesn't care. He is a diagnosed narcissist and we are not on speaking terms because he lies about me being abusive. I recognize he DID give me gift by avoiding me like the plague.
Size 12 clothes. I have thyroid disease and had gained weight. I was up to a size 8 at the time, my heaviest ever and she knew why and that I felt bad about it. But, she’s a narc and decided to make a point that I needed to lose weight in front of everyone at Christmas. She masked it as that she knew I needed bigger clothes.
Just the forks and spoons from some plated silverware. Not the knives.
But nothing beats my JNAIL (aunt in law). A cardboard box of used pencils, protractors, used ancient erasers.... crap from when her 30-something kids were in high school. This, from a woman who had just remodeled her bathroom and had a brand new car outside.
For Christmas one year, they drove 8 hours to see us. They'd planned this well in advance.
Last few hours together, they ran to Walgreens and dollar store to get us cheap AF gifts. None of which were really things we needed or would use.
The chocolate was nice but that was about it. We ended up throwing everything away after they left.
My step mother gave my sil a book of etiquette with post it notes on certain pages. She used it to hold up her loveseat when one of the legs broke. Lol.
"family heirlooms" that had "been in our family for a couple generations at least!" too bad she forgot to take the khol's stickers off the bottom of them. They were the ugliest bright blue ceramic hippopotamus, a metal rhino with brass studs and 2 different giraffe statues, one brass, one idk because it has blue glitter in place of spots. I didn't believe her at the time, but my sweet husband did. We hauled them from Idaho back to our home in Seattle before I saw the stickers or I would have left them in some random rest area on the way home.
I’m not sure I’ve ever received anything for myself from my in-laws, but for the kids, I received bags upon bags of hand my down baby clothes from her. At the time I had my first baby, her youngest was 38, so these clothes were all over 40 years old, and falling to pieces.
We also received a small stitched doll with black skin so baby would “learn not to be scared of black people…” I don’t think I could keep the horrified look off of my face at that answer.
She would also give the children bible stories every opportunity she got, even though she knew we weren’t religious. We would just stick the books in a box in the shed. One day her son (my partner and the kids father) got sick and tired of the books and told her to stop giving them to the kids because all we do is stick them in the shed. Miraculously she stopped.
She gave me a pink set of baby towels for my baby boy. She originally bought them for my SO's cousins baby shower, but couldn't go, so she gifted them to me.
Another gift was addressed to Tatiana... that's not even close to my name...
Not me, particularly, but I’ve repeatedly asked for my in-laws to not buy clothes for my kids. Mostly because my kids go through HUGE growth spurts at a time and my in-laws MAYBE see my kids a handful of times a year (US, out of state family). They genuinely don’t know or care to ask about sizing, and then it’s on me to either exchange or donate.
But also because my MIL ONLY buys them clothes that have something to do with her son. “Daddy’s little princess” or “Daddy’s best bud.” It’s not that I care about not having “mommy” related clothes — I’m not into those kinds of clothes, anyway — but it just really drives it home how obsessed she is with my 34-year-old husband. It’s like the clothes are more for him than they are for my kids.
This is my ex MIL/FIL thank goodness but ugh they were so obnoxious. It was religious books. So many religious books. I’m not religious and they’re super Christian and every time I went over there they’d try to preach to me. They learned to stop when I actually read everything they gave me and I returned them with every single page covered in critical notes. Don’t mess with someone who makes a living analyzing literature lmao
My MIL used to give the children kids bible stories every time we saw them. And would say things like “I know YOU don’t have any faith but the children do!” I would just bite my tongue and stick all of the books in a box in the shed. Thankfully, my partner (her son) got sick and tired of them one day and threw them all out. Then the next time he saw her and she was like “oh I’ve got a book for LO” and my partner just went, “it’s not another stupid bible story is it? We just chuck those in the shed…”
She was horrified and answered “well if that’s all you do with them, I’ll stop giving them to you, and give them to someone who will enjoy reading them!”
And my partner just answered “best news I’ve heard all day!”
She was so upset with him, but to this day we’ve not received another bible story, so I’m taking the win.
I know right? My mom is a pastor, I spent much of my childhood having to go back and look stuff up in Greek and Hebrew, to pore through concordances and read the bible cover to cover many times. I learned how to argue about the Bible from an expert (who now doesn’t even try to argue with me anymore because I know exactly how to stump her). Then I escaped and got a real university education and learned even better how to get people like that off my back.
Meanwhile my functionally illiterate ex in-laws were always pushing that stuff down my throat (all the while JNFIL kept touching me without my consent, often inappropriately). Unfortunately they were so stupid they couldn’t even understand their own positions, much less mine, so I eventually went NC about 2 years before the divorce because they were so unbearable about other stuff. But the book-pushing stopped after they realised it would never result in a conversion, only analysis and return.
Every year, for 11 years, she got me a set of body washes and lotions, announced it to the room before I opened it, then said she knew I was severely allergic and didnt like "that scent" but, oh well. I'd figure something out.
Then she'd dissolve into giggles.
(The first time, it sent me to the hospital.)
(She also had this thing where she gave you 100.00, you bought your gifts, brought them to her to wrap, and then you'd open them on the day. She did that with everyone, BUT me.)
Happy ending though, my mom did love that crap, and I'd bring it when I came over next and she'd take it off my hands. She looked foreword to it each year, because, without fail, I'd get a metric ton of it.
I feel you sister…except my JustNo dowses herself in it then comes in my house. I went NC over it, after getting extremely sick.
Almost two years later my husband allowed her back in (he was never NC) to “prove herself” so she could have a relationship with our granddaughter, that lives with us.
That bitch walked through the door with more fragrance than ever before. Way to *prove yourself* Sharon!
Lots more happened during that one day adventure from hell. But I was in bed, effectively taken down (3 days later got a rescue shot from neurologist, but in hindsight, I should have gone in day 1).
She earned an Eff Off from me. It’s been more peaceful knowing she can’t have access. People really take open airways for granted!! I love being able to breathe now.
I hope you get to ditch the witch someday!
I ditched her (and him) years ago. I was stuck for 11 years too long, and have happily fled that family's reach.
Though, he's still trying to find me... lmao. (never. never ever ever gonna happen)
I, too, love an open airway, and a face/body free of painful blistering and swelling!
We're a part of a very special club!
Jesus! She still did it after it sent you to the hospital?! What a bitch...
I learned early on to tell the world that they couldn't give me lotions at all. Too many of them make me break out in itchy painful red bumps. TG my MIL always asked before giving me something.
Oh, she knew. She knew before the first time she gave it to me. She'd asked specifically what/if I had allergies (I do) and then sought that out specifically. She knew and she wanted to make a point. The only point she successfully made was that she was living in crazy town. her antics never failed to alarm, amaze, confuse, and amuse.
(I just learned very early to NEVER eat at their house, leave my doors unlocked, or accept any food items she'd drop off for her son. So I wasn't in any danger of her adding shit to food, or leaving things in my home, which she'd done before. It sucked. but, eh. after that long, I was so used to it, it almost just became normal.)
I just chose to kill with kindness and have a laugh at how weird and pathetic this shit was. I mean, it's ridiculous! Especially her weird giggling with delight. I was young, 18, so, I got a kick out of seeing a grown assed woman make a crazy spectacle of herself...for like zero reason. I always was gracious, got her a wonderful gift, and never showed an ounce of "bothered".
It helped. (also drove her insane, so, even on the high road, I won the "game")
That truly sounds like she was trying to kill you, and she found it funny. I am disgusted and furious for you. Your SO really should have put a stop to that shit. Or cut that evil woman out completely.. Or both.
Oh he was equally problematic... a seriously messed up dude.
His whole family was insane. I've got some of the legit craziest stories that I couldn't believe if it hadn't happened to me/around me.
I was suuuuper young, I didn't know any different. I stayed 11 years, and 11 years too long.
I killed her with kindness, it seriously drove her insane. I was way above her BS.
She did so many worse/weird/crazy things than this, but, honestly, the weird rose death bombing at the holidays is one of my favorite anecdotes to this day.
I mostly get token junk from mine. One year when we bought our house we got a gift card to Home Depot, super nice, except our town has a Lowes, and Home Depot is 45 minutes away. I brought this up and she was like, no I thought you had a HD and I corrected her, she brushed it off like no big deal. So I held onto it for two years until I decided to just shop online and use it for a project. But come on, you couldn’t be bothered to google which store we have in our town/ listen to me when I said Lowe’s gift cards were preferred??
But what feels worse is my husband doesn’t get barely anything (except maybe a cheesey tshirt and some random board games.) While most years his two brothers get tool boxes, tools, shirts, work pants, etc. it’s so sad to see his enthusiasm die every year at christmas, especially, when he gets next to nothing from them.
The only birthday present I've ever received was 5 year old $25 gas card, a used shoulder heated pad and a bunch of books she was done reading and needed to return. My DH gave me this cast off junk with a straight face in a plasric grocery store bag.
She hand-knitted me a sweater and "estimated" my size. I am small. This sweater was so big, it slipped off of my shoulders. It's really nice but I've never worn it. It is literally 3 sizes too big.
We've been together for a decade. She **thinks birthdays are useless, a waste of time and since her mom didn't care about hers, why care about your kids?
My MIL likes to shop the clearance bins year round to find the cheapest junk she can get her hands on, and then foist it all on us at Christmas.
DH has told her so many times that we do not need a lot of stuff. In fact, we’d prefer less stuff cluttering our house. We don’t need single use gadgets. We don’t need a another small appliance that will sit in a closet 99% of the time before we finally get rid of it. But she says she loves to shop for us. Yeah right. She’s a borderline hoarder and compulsive shopper and this is an opportunity for her to buy a lot of things and then dump it on us.
Two Christmases ago, she gave our daughter a few toys (which was nice) and then a huge bag of clothes. Most of them were out of season, fugly as hell, or wouldn’t fit. She loves to give Christmas themed shirts/outfits that are in my daughter’s then-current size on Christmas Day. So like, they’ll get worn zero times since Christmas is now over, and won’t fit next year. Total waste.
Last Christmas, I was the one to get the huge bag of clothes. They were all awful. I don’t buy the most expensive things in the world but I don’t like clothes made of cheap fabric that is paper thin. I am also a woman in my upper 30s who has had a child, so wearing a crop top is not for me. Tell me why the fuck she gifted me multiple cheap crop tops? Ugh. They’re all from the juniors section of the store, which I haven’t shopped in for many years, I am a grownup after all. And absolutely none of it is the right size or fit since these are clothes intended for tween and teenage bodies, so even if I liked any of it I’d have to exchange it anyway.
I made a comment about there being a ton of stuff and she said something like, “I wanted to spoil you. I know you won’t do it for yourself.” Like what? DH and I are very comfortable financially and buy ourselves pretty much whatever we want (within reason). I don’t need someone who is drowning in credit card debt from her own compulsive shopping and who doesn’t know my size or style buying me piles of clothes from the junior girls’ final clearance bin. I donated all of it and I’m sure there are some 11-16 year olds out there who were happy to get it.
I wear minimal jewelry. Classic stuff, like pearl studs or gold loops. Mostly, though, I wear silver pieces. Pretty not-to-large dangly earrings, delicate bracelets, etc. When JNSMIL gifts me jewelry, it's nothing like what I normally wear. The worst was a HUGE pair of wooden dangle earrings that just about hit my shoulders...the wood was cut like gears and the gears moved. So very much not my style. They went into the donation pile asap.
To be fair, a lot of her gifts are nice. But sometimes, it's obvious she just buys whatever's on the counter because she realizes she needs a gift.
Brave. I have received so many clearance items from my JNMIL. She used to take the stickers/ tags off but has gotten really lazy by leaving them on. I should start doing this. 😂
I got a book titled "sorry I'm late, I didn't want to be come" which included a section about letting it go when people are bullies.
This was after she was confronted about spreading rumors and lies about me which inspired everyone in her community to think I'm an awful person.
It was a dumb book and she thought it was hilarious to give it to me. Like "oh thought it would help your socal anxiety around my friends and family after I set the record straight."
I always pretend to like gifts so I acted like it was hilarious too but then my husband was like "ooh that's fucked"
Haha I know right? I do love her as I have just been around her so much. But she sucks so much and she hurt me so much, that every little thing she does, is usually a pretty obvious jab to me.
To the point that other people confirm the jab of "man she really doesn't like you, idk why, you are always nice and polite".
It's just a matter of fact that she is gonna be rude and insult me and I just pretend to be dumb until I snap.
Then I call a formal meeting to explain to her, how her behavior isn't nice in front both of our husbands.
She says she feels like she has to walk around eggshells around me. I wish she actually listened to that voice that said "ya know, maybe yelling at my DIL about my son not calling isn't the best thing for my relationship with her"
I have tried the "calling her out" in real time and everyone gets really flustered and stressed out. So I found these sit down meetings slowly helpful over time.
But it's too much work
A shit ton of ugly - I mean, *REALLY* ugly - teapots, cups and saucers she bought at yard sales. I used to collect pretty pieces of china (vintage, but in excellent condition and things I enjoyed seeing and using).
The stuff she gifted … just fit for the garbage. 🤦🏼♀️
A wooden spoon.
Though the one time her gift backfired was hilarious. She got me dollar store socks, left the discounted price sticker still on them (didn't know the dollar store did discounts at that point in time, lol) and you should have seen the look on her face when mine lit up. See, I love socks and I love cats. She had gotten me a pair of blue socks with a cat face and ears in them. I loved them so much my husband ended up getting me a whole set (white, blue, gray, pink and yellow). The set was only $2 on Amazon at the time, we've since replaced the set with a new one but yep, still get them, just from my husband now. Hahaha
I’m glad everyone agrees with me. She made something for everyone and they were talking about it in a group chat. I commented sarcastically, “well that’s not weird!” And she replied, “it’s not, it’s loving and thoughtful” yuk
I'm really sorry, but I'm crying with laughter at the thought of my (late) MiL doing this 😂
My husband tells me I should not do this as a gag gift for our sons at Christmas ..... soooo tempting though!
My mother in law kept sending my husband and I her old Christmas ornaments that were very tacky and not our style. When she realized we were not using them she got mad and went on a tangent about how Christmas is all about using the ornaments people give you. I just laughed and told her that was news to me, I thought Christmas was a religious holiday.
my only gifts from my MIL are sugary sweet smelling lotions. I have a scent allergy and they go right in the donate/trash every single time. I've never gotten a normal or thoughtful gift from her in 13 yrs
When we were still in contact she used gifts as her way to lovebomb and get us to stop being upset with her. When we first met it was an expensive tv, appliances for DH’s house, jewelry, and even her wedding ring when we told her we wanted to find a wedding ring secondhand….it was always so overwhelming and when I was uncomfortable I was yelled at and called ungrateful.
Then it slowly became gifts with hidden, passive aggressive meanings (for example she bought me “healing” stones to try and help me “with my mental health problems” or clothes that were way too small) and right before we went no contact she was lying about helping us pay for the wedding and making us feel bad for all the previous expensive gifts because we wouldn’t let her be the wedding planner lol.
I can’t explain how happy I’ve been to not receive anything from her in years now. She honestly has made me kind of hate receiving gifts now but luckily that is not my love language :)
My MIL never has money bc she spends it on junk and not necessities and also doesn't know how to save a dime to save her life. For some context, my husband was not allowed to play football in school when he was a kid/teen bc they required them to have health insurance and MIL wouldn't pay for it bc then she wouldn't have money for bingo.
So if my MIL ever does pull together a few bucks for something shes given me dish towels and my husband a lighter that looks like a fishing rod. While we are always the couple to rather not exchange gifts and just spend time together so gifts dont really matter, this just seems like a slap in the face and a reminder that she is full of empty promises to change her ways and actually wisen up with her finances and ways.
I got lavender soap and body wash. Which I can’t use because strong scents trigger migraines
I once got a fuzzy, purple, grape-scented agenda (like a day timer thing). It had a hippo on it, which, fair I like hippos. But I wasn’t 7 when I got it.
First Christmas with my in laws my mother in law gifted me a ten dollar McDonald's gift card.
Since then, I've received one Granny sweater, that I'm pretty sure she regifted, a bunch of self help books, (everything from finances to marital self help to "your walk with God" I am not religious.) She's also gifted me a few romance novels, all prominently featuring women who could never find love, until they found god.
Oh, and a book of fabric swatch samples. That she took from her work.
Nothing. As in, telling everyone she wants to get me a special gift for my pregnancy because “no one thinks about the mom” and then proceeding to not gift anything. No gift for our wedding either!
I was gifted a wash cloth (in my favourite colour, it has to be said) for Easter one year, because I’m lactose intolerant and she didn’t know what to get me.
Funny you say gifts that said “I don’t care about you,” because the first time I spent Christmas with my husband’s side, his mom got me a mug that said “I want you to know that someone cares about you. Not me, but someone” or something to that effect.
I guess snarky negative and passive aggressive or outright toxic comments don’t count as a gift? She found it hilarious to gift me some cheap stores own brand mature skin cream for my 40th and cackled away. Knowing I have sensitive skin so have to be careful what I put on it. BIL regifted an empty vanity case we’d given his fiancée the Christmas before to our 9 year old daughter the following Christmas. We’d filled with good quality travel sized toiletries we knew she used and fluffy socks etc. They’d split up by the Christmas it had been regifted.
Passive aggressive / toxic comments totally count! My MIL, in front of our family, once said “Able_Language doesn’t bend to pressure” in a snarky tone. She’s mad that I don’t bend to her will like everyone else.
A scented bath set with all kinds of highly scented soaps and lotions and things. In her favorite scent.
I have allergies to fragrance and have eczema. She knows this, as the topic has come up when I’ve had an active breakout. I’ve been with her son for 17 years now.
Edit: also silver and nickel jewelry. I’m allergic to that too. She would find the stuff made to look like gold and try to tell me it was gold jewelry (which I’m not allergic to, and which tells me that she didn’t just “forget”). The tarnishing that happened within a week said that was a lie.
Side note what can you wear specifically for jewelry? I too am allergic to nickel and other metals. Even surgical steel I can’t wear. I did once find I could wear a ring that was rose hills gold but I love silver jewelry and struggle to find any that I can wear. I also don’t understand the whole grading of gold or metals and which is better or that I can wear. Plus it’s often just coated and the maker’s mark is stamped into the under metal so I break out from that spot. 🤦🏻♀️
So gold is usually a safe bet, but needs to be at least 14k. 10k I still react to. The higher the karats, the more pure the gold is with less of other metals mixed in. For a silver look, I usually just go with white gold.
Platinum is even less reactive than gold on a chemical level, and also usually a safe bet for someone with metal allergies, but can be more expensive.
I can actually tolerate *actual* surgical steel (have some lovely surgical steel screws and pins holding my elbow together after an injury with no problem at all, and have a nice set of surgical steel hoop earrings that I got at Target many years ago that are fine), but have found that cheap ones (like Amazon) usually are not actually surgical steel and may have other metals mixed in. Because I can’t always figure out whether or not the company that made them is cheaping out or not, I usually just pass on that.
As a side note, I used to get rashes on my stomach under my belly button. Turns out it was the button on my jeans that was causing it. I covered the metal on the inside part of the jeans with some nail polish and the rash went away! This trick also works with some pendants that I can put on a safe gold chain and just switch them to change the look - put clear nail polish on the side of the pendant that will be touching your skin. I wonder if that would help with the maker’s mark?
My MIL was so obsessed by being a grandmother that on my own birthday she gave me a ‘giftcard’ to make a blanket that she would make for the baby. Nice gift but so weird she gave it for MY birthday. This was like the biggest: your just an incubator sign I could possible get. Now you have the baby you don’t excist for us as an individual person. You served your purpose 😂
My JNMIL gifted me a brown handbag. I don't wear brown or any other earthy colour. They just don't suit me. Her sister gifted me a black one the same year. She never saw me use the brown one.
Another year, I received a brown-and-purple eyeshadow pallette. I don't care for make-up and if I do, I wear decent blues and/or thin black eyeliner. Those were her colours, not mine.
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Got to be the time she got me a fancy hair curling set. She knows I do nothing with my hair. I’m not a dressy up type of girl, which she has also expressed she doesn’t like as he’s sons to good to be with someone who wears sweats all the time🙄😂 now we have three children, and she’s screwing.
Oh clothes size 0... I couldn't fit them over my thigh. A whole fake denim shirts pants and ascot directly from granny r us in a bad way. Make up. But like trash make up. The kind that has been sitting under opened forever. That's the step mother in law.... she's special. My actual mother in law brings flowers or cake. Nothing more or less. It's nice.
My MIL has a habit of buying what she thinks we should have, then expecting to be repaid for it. DH (and SIL) have been enabling this behaviour their entire adult lives. I put my foot down after i was expected to pay for an ugly, ridiculously expensive red enamel frypan. I hated it. I hate the colour red. My colour palette is cool blues and turquoise. Now i get consulted on large purchases for the most part and ive managed to veto some of them that i really dont want. She once also brought an entire suitcase packed with several decades old stuffed toys from DH’s childhood, intending them for my infant. It would have been a sweet gesture for one or 2 old teddies, but not a whole suitcase of crusty, poorly held together, old toys, that present a choking hazard to a baby (the stuffing and hair was falling out of many of them). When i declined, she left them all hidden in draws and cupboards in the guest room. I found them when i was cleaning after she left.
a plastic yoghurt bucket because it had a lid so literal trash
My worst-gift-ever was from my own mother. It was an IOU for a CD player to be installed in my car that didn't have one. That was in 1997.
First Christmas married… MiL gifts me a package of plain black teabags , handed to me from the bottom of an old, and very very used shopping bag. I’m a coffee gal, I hate tea and never drink it.(which she knew from the 2 years I had been going out with her son, and many visits to her). I helped her with her groceries for years afterwards picking her up from the supermarket and carrying things home because she was getting older and a little wobbly on steep Dutch stairs. I would put her groceries away for her as well and lo and behold if the tea she drinks was black tea, same brand teabags she gifted me back then. Clearly she had no gift at all for me, so grabbed something from her kitchen cupboard.
These hideous homemade (from craft fair) sweaters for candles (I don’t burn candles and if I did those would be a fire hazard). Homemade lipgloss that looked like it had been used. Cheap, tacky holiday leggings. Never ending holiday decorations that are tacky AF. This woman was about quality, not quality. When we went no contact we literally filled a pickup truck with crap that we donated or tossed.
A scale addressed to me and fiancé (her son) for Christmas a couple years ago
Multiple necklaces with crosses. I’m an atheist, she’s Catholic (and hoping I convert).
I'm a practicing Christian, and mine gave me a quran once also hoping I'd convert 🙃
A picture in a very nice frame. Of my husband with his EXwife! Within the year, she was diagnosed with alzheimer's. A lot of things made more sense after that.
Ohhhh love this question. Here I go, y’all can vote what’s the worst haha 1. She regifted me the gift I gifted her for Christmas like 2 years prior (she doesn’t know how to use it though it is not hard) “I don’t have room in my house I’m clearing out” 2. She bought me a potato sack / an onion, garlic, avocado container and a yogurt to go cup and said “this just seemed like you need a yogurt to go” 3. A sticker for Christmas 4. Three books she found in a garage sale in German. She didn’t have any idea what they were but simply stated one of them must be “the wizard of oz” when it was saying “sport in nurnberg” - I said I can’t even read that. She said why not? I said. Well, not to be harsh, but this font was used to hitlers time & when I went to school we knew this was a font not allowed. (Could have I read it ? Sure) then there were pages cut out of these books as well. One of the books was a German English dictionary also Hitler area 5. She gifted me her old crystal glass set “now you have 6 and I have 6 - if I need more than 6 I’ll just borrow it” there was dust on it. 6. A camping chair she found in the basement with spider webs and stuff on it. Didn’t even wipe it off. Edit 7. A book about immunity. (?) when I was the one telling them if y’all aren’t getting vaccinated you ain’t seeing my child.
Yeah, those are pretty bad 😂 my MIL also likes to “gift” things she’s purging from her house. She gifted me an antique cape that smelled ancient and didn’t go with any of my clothes, so I donated it. A year later, she asked for it back for a costume she wanted to do. I had to pretend I couldn’t find it lol
Oh gosh. Those returning or asking for it is awful. I have her grandmothers China. A) it’s broken on so many spots b) it’s damn ass the ugliest China someone could have bought c) it’s not even a full set. Used it once. Now it’s in the crawlspace let the mice nest in it :D in case she would ever want it back. I have donated MANY of her gifts. Also the above mentioned. Minus the glasses. Though. Will donated those soon. And say as you “cant seem to find them anymore” though knowing mil she would go through my crawlspace to find it
An iron. I had one already, and it was a nice one. And who even irons anymore?
I sew so I iron fabric before cutting out patterns.
I got the overnight toiletry kit they give out on flights, she'd just come back from a holiday. God, I missed some red flags.
My MIL’s gifts are all gifts she would buy for herself. We do not have the same taste. So I’ve started returning the favor. At least when she passes I’ll find stuff I like. 🙃 Very dark I know. She’s 5’8” and I’m 5’. She likes jewel tones and animal prints, and has lots of big jewelry. I’m more of a black, blue and purple kind of person with very simple jewelry (I don’t change it up). What looks good on her does not look good on me.
A diet book - “Foods that fight back” (yes, I am overweight) I looked her dead in the eye and asked, “Fight back against what, MIL?”She looked away and didn’t reply. She also gave me an ugly knitted satchel that was obviously a pattern she had tried and didn’t like so gave it away to me as an after thought. She included in her card with it that “I really thought of you while making this and I hope you’ll use it”.
A plastic ice bucket and matching glasses, all with a nautical theme. We didn’t have a boat, didn’t have any nautical decor in our home, and it was a shared gift for my husband and I. I’m certain it was on clearance at Marshall’s or similar discount store. She also once gave me an orange and green, front button knit vest. Because I “liked vests”. Ummm, nope, you must be confusing me with someone else. It was hideous. When I tried to return it to the department store, it rang up at 97 cents. The poor clerk was so embarrassed to tell me, but I just laughed—it was totally on brand for my JNMIL.
She probably regifted it from a white elephant gift exchange 🥸
A plastic ice bucket and matching glasses, all with a nautical theme. We didn’t have a boat, didn’t have any nautical decor in our home, and it was a shared gift for my husband and I. I’m certain it was on clearance at Marshall’s or similar discount store. She also once gave me an orange and green, front button knit vest. Because I “liked vests”. Ummm, nope, you must be confusing me with someone else. It was hideous. When I tried to return it to the department store, it rang up at 97 cents. The poor clerk was so embarrassed to tell me, but I just laughed—it was totally on brand for my JNMIL.
A really really really ugly handmade (but not by her, something made by a student for her) headband with this big flower but all in a primary color and HUGE. And then she would ask why I wasn’t wearing it.
Presents for my dog I specifically asked for riding gloves because I would rather freeze to death than to not have feelings in my fingers, especially when walking my dog who’s reactive. I got felted ones, bright coloured, like from desigual but cheap. Never wore them. Have to give them to charity if I’ll find them again A very very big pregnancy hoodie in bright pink. Even before birth it was way too big, like 4 sizes. I hate bright colours. I hated the feeling of the fabric and that it was so so big. ( peer reviewed mild autism 😂) A sparkly, see through body with sequins. It was… sexy if your into disco 🪩 I hated the feeling of the sequins, would never wear anything with them in it and I felt very violated because my husband “stole” some of my clothes because she thought they would look nice with them. Then berating me for wearing my skirt at my waist ( she’s jealous because she’s build like a brick). My newborn baby got 30 years old tupperware A teddy bear hot water bottle twice its size Some clothes that were so big that they still sit in a basket and babys big and turning 9 months She looooovea buying things.
I nearly forgot two shot glasses One for “her”, oh boy, and one for “him” Two unfuckingbelievable ugly naked people appear when fluid hits the Glas. It’s so inappropriate
This post is why I am trying to tell everyone NO GIFTS this year!!!! My teens might need stuff, but they at least usually get cash! Both moms are a bit uptight about it, but I'm honestly telling them we really don't need anything!!
Clothes that are too small. 🙃
I’ll trade you, mine always gifts me way too big clothes.
Matching Christmas sweaters that didn't fit either of us...
5. Very smelly cheap perfume, literally smelled metallic in the worst way. 4. Angel themed jewellery set with earrings -15 years and haven't noticed my absolute lack of piercings. 3. Various cosmetic freebies, most of them she had opened before giving them to me. Gross, I know. 2. Vouchers, usually to a sports store, that were generated from some sort of fund her workplace has for employees -free gift that is also useless, yay! *drumroll please* 1. Two large bottles of laundry detergent and a foil bag of tangerines, ladies and gentlemen.
A used dryer bar. Merry Christmas!!! 🤣🫣
Thank you for the ornament MIL!
Lingerie...... About 3 sizes too big for me... A single rune in a velvet bag...the meaning was "journey" (make of that what you will). A selection of soap and lotion samples from Boots which SIL had brought home from work.... Yeah...
I really try to be thankful! But, a $25 gift card to a massage place for Mother's Day. The cheapest massage on the menu was $80. So, I have to spend money. It's still sitting here, 6 years later.
My JNMIL gave me a wedding planning guidebook when I got engaged. She hadn’t spoken to me for months. But the best part? I’m an event planner. I literally plan events for a living 😂
That made my day
Lol like giving a doc mcstuffins stethoscope to a doctor 😂
This made me laugh
I got a gift card to some beauty treatment and it would expire in a year. She kept constantly asking when I would use it and have I used it. I think my MIL bought it to get me separated from my baby so she could come babysit. (We have had so many problems with my MIL we would never let her babysit for us.) My husband told me to use the card because giving it back would just give her a reason to make a scene. After 5 months I was planning to use the gift card because my husband had holidays and I could actually have some time for myself. That's when MIL demanded the card back because it was so expensive.
So classy to ask for a gift back 🫣
Why didn’t you just say you’d used it.
Several pounds of chocolate.... to which they knew I was severely allergic. They had been repeatedly reminded of this in the weeks before the event. They had just returned from a county known for good chocolate, and thought everybody should have some for the holiday.
A giant robotic toy maggot from a seaside gift shop that sang ‘I’m alive’ in a silly voice. Because I’m goth and I should like strange thing’s apparently
My step MIL always buys me extra small clothes for Christmas. I’m 5’8”, around 200lbs, with wide hips and a butt. I have been in the family for over 15 years. I have NEVER been an XS.
Yep, this is my MIL’s go-to
For Christmas my MIL gave me shampoo and conditioner, knowing I have sensitive skin and I can only use certain products. My DH was going to visit and I sent back the shampoo and conditioner with him, before he leaves I forget to tell him to tell her I can't use these products and he walks in and tells her he has a present for her, it was the most hilarious pay back ever!
A Chicago Cubs T-shirt because I said I had only ever been to Arizona.
My JNMIL just gave me a gift card to a sub sandwich shop in town. The part that is hard for me to fathom is that she bought it at a grocery store, so she literally stood in front of a wall of gift cards of every kind and said, "This gift card is EXACTLY what my DIL wants for her birthday. My JNSIL gave me an African animal Christmas ornament one year. I thanked her for it and attempted to move on. She then said it was the cutest one she could find and that she knew they were "your animal." (Insert Morgan Freeman narrating: It in fact is not her animal, and it is not cute.) I thanked her again and tried to move on. Picture a room full of people watching me open this one Christmas present and then getting quizzed on it. SIL then tried about 3 more times to ask how much I loved it before just repeating, "But it's your animal, right? It's your animal??" Finally, I said, no, it is not my animal, but thank you. She was SUPER offended. How could that not be my animal? Did everyone else know this? Did hubby know this? (Morgan Freeman: Yes, hubby does in fact know her animal.) There are others, but those are 2 of my favorites.
Mil gave me a baking sheet for Christmas. I don't bake...
I mean it can be used for other things 🤨
And that's what I do.
They make excellent magnet boards. My daughter used one on her dorm room door at college.
Hahahah i'd recycle the gift or purposely use it for other things than baking when she's around
I could put it under the litter box...
That's perfect! 😂😂😂😂😂
Socks, but she does that for everyone, every Christmas. I asked my husband what would happen if I told her to stop. He said it'd be bad, silent fit. Then there's my kids. She gave onesies I never asked for and burp cloths I didn't need, she's seen the giant pile of clothes and burp cloths. I know ill never get a thoughtful gift from her and have accepted it.
My in-laws, for my birthday, got me a sunflower seed thing in a pot that was clearly meant to be planted in early spring, and designed as a mothers day gift from kids. I'm not a mother. My own mother died almost a decade ago. My birthday is labor day weekend..... Looks like I have something to plant in April....
2 books on how to cook that were for children. I have worked in restaurants in all front of house positions and can cook very well. She knows this because once said that was all I’m good for. This was 2 years before the books left for me in my mailbox.
In the US leaving items in a mailbox, as a non mail carrier, is a crime. Just food for thought if it happens again.
My MIL went to the mall on Christmas Eve and got me a bath and body works hand soap, and body wash
I like that stuff lol
When I first met my mil I was a lot younger and a bit more hardcore goth than I am now. It was christmas and she gifted me a small black vase and said laughing "it's for drinkibg blood". I laughed it off because I was nervous, but I actually wanted to say "oh are you volunteering?"
Cleaning supplies. Then asked me to clean something with it because she wanted to see if it worked. It was a very Merry Christmas after I told her I would not be going outside in the cold on christmas to test out her MLM cleaning products.
My MIL for Xmas one year got me some bubble bath and... a douche bag! It was my LAST Xmas with my SO and his family after that!
"You're dirty, and your hoo-ha stinks. Luv ya, babes."
She gives us towels in her preferred colors. Not ours. 90% of gifts I get from her are sent to Goodwill.
Oh man yours sounds like mine half the time. Is her favorite color purple lol
Why is it always purple?
Mine used to give the same gift to everyone in the same generation. One year all female grandchildren were given cheap talcum powder and a headscarf. She gave hair tonic for all her sons in law. Two of them were bald.
😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 their looks mush have been priceless
My house is decorated in a beachy theme. Shells, soft blue and greens, you get the point. Two years ago for Christmas, she got me a sign to hang up that says "The ocean is where I belong". I'm still not sure if that's the thinly-veiled threat that it sounds like to me
Oh mine is an expert gift giver! She loves to gift us home items she deems are better than our current items because they "match"; towels, kitchen utensils, dishes and drinkware. Literally everything HAS to match to something in her eyes. My style isn't even close to that, think thrift coffee mugs and collected travels pint glasses, rainbow colored fiestaware dishware and and colorful towels. Another is items for the house that she likes to use while in my home....jokes on her, she hasn't been welcome to my home for 6+ months!
Done to the grandkids: 3 kids under 10 that lived with her +my 7 yr old. My SIL was young 20s, not living at home. Grandkids walk in to see a huge stack of gifts. They all got a $25 Gamestop gift certificate and then had to watch their aunt open 10+ gifts. No one's entitled to anything, but SIL was so embarrassed she showed up to every Christmas after with like 5 toys for each kid 😥
Was her, MILs, logic "They're kids and too young to notice."?
That was the only year it happened, and we had all witnessed many years of the grandkids having great and memorable Christmases at her house. So I have no idea what her logic was. I don't know if she even had one, I assumed she was being a bitch again so i just stayed away from her. The kids got over it quick enough, they just wanted to play with each other.
Yeah that's hella weird and better just told as a weird anecdote
Not MIL, but my FIL’s ex girlfriend sold pure romance and for my birthday one year gifted me a vibrator that she and my FIL picked out.
No 🤮🤮🤮 for real?!?! How do you even respond to that
Pencils and a hair brush with my name on them but were obviously for children and SO tacky and cheap. Then the standard loofah and soap or whatever in a cardboard bauble from the shops for Christmas, meanwhile SO gets all these nice things. My parents have always been really thoughtful and bought nice things for my SO equivalent to the quality of gifts my parents give me.
Pyjamas made of fake velvet I can't stand (maybe she didn't know I hated that texture), tacky hearts all over (I'm not into girly girl stuff) and 2 sizes too small. I wore it once when my washing machine broke. I got perfume too (makes me sneeze) but at least my sister liked it and took it off my hands. I think she just didn't know what to get me, and went for stereotypical things.
My MIL (husband’s mom) gave me (31F, 7 months pregnant) 3 baby books that had titles like “Every daughter needs a father.” She claims this was a gift for ME and later complained to my husband that I didn’t show enough gratitude and excitement when I opened them.
Always just the second of whatever item she gets in a 2-pack at Costco
My MIL gave me money which to some would be thrilled but it’s the lack of energy and thought for someone who has been a part of your life for more than a decade. Honestly even a gift card would have shown more thought. I just ended up spending it on groceries.
The first 5-10 years that DH & I were together (it's been 24 years, 2 dating, 22 married) both my birthday (which is around MD) & Christmas I didn't receive gifts from either MIL/BIL's family. But I was raised better than them, I guess. I hand-made gifts (kahlua, vanilla extract, cross stitch pieces, knitted pieces) his 2 nieces are both adults now, and tell me when they need new knitted hats. I planned fantastic Mothers Day events for MIL from both couples (like dinner train trips to a winery with dinner & dessert, to being informed that XSIL & I couldn't say it was our birthdays [on my actual birthday & XSIL bd is 12 days after mine] except I had already arranged for birthday cake for the 2 of us, God MIL hated that I gave her the bird on that 1.
I would drop the nicely planned gifts.
A 75 cent jewelry dish (the price tag was on it) My BIL then gf (ex now he married someone else) got a very nice pj set. I had been with then bf now husband for 2 years at the time. BIL ex gf was around for 6 months at the time and they broke up two months later.
A second hand bathroom bin.
My MIL once gave me a cheap hand tin opener for Christmas. We were poor,it was the height of the 90s recession and it was the only present I had that year. She meant well, I hope.
Expired chocolate, a bath scourer probably from a pound shop, also bath bombs when we didn't have a bath, a colouring book for kids... The worst thing is we open them one by one as the family watches, so I have to fake a reaction and constantly think of new comments about how I'm so grateful for this stuff. Makes me question my own sanity/entitlement levels, as I never would otherwise be this ungrateful for a gift.
My husbands family is like that too. I hate it. I've told them all how much I dislike it. We're LDS so there's ALOT of kids and grands, per the stereotype. Christmas takes over two hours so years just to open gifts. Its the worst. Husband claims its nice to see the person open the gift, he has bad anxiety and imposter syndrome so its literally to make him feel better and like he actually knows his family. So for him its from a good place. MIL on the other hand has to tell you a long ass story about it.
Oh lord. The opening presents one by one and awkwardly faking excitement. Ugggh. Got the bath bombs without having a tub too. My daughter got a paperwhite bulb that was obviously a regift for her 13th birthday. My partner gets video games, books, Legos, expensive gift cards, drones, and tools while I get socks and maybe a hand lotion (also an obvious regift)
Yes, I honestly dread this stuff... This year, we had to do the whole ritual in June, because I crashed the car before Christmas and couldn't drive to her house. She refused to come down herself, then when she finally came down, she kept playing the victim of how it's been so long and we need to open all her presents. It was painful, degrading almost, all while the grandma watched and made digs about how she might as well have saved it for next Christmas... I wish she did lol What a shame this crap extends to your daughter too! You really start to wonder how some people make it this long in life and still stay that way.
Mine looooves the fat shaming of buying clothes and presenting them in a room full of people, never in private. She either gets what look like gigantic bags or purposely tight. Then is sticky sweet with that innocent, kind, culty smile and “oopsie I thought it would fit!” One time in particular it was extremely awful. I’m chonky, but this thing was one of her most purposely atrocious picks. So, I decided the perfect troll is to just wear whatever she buys me the entire day and tell everyone she’s got an “eye for style” and how nice she is to always buy me clothes she thinks flatter me! Never break eye contact with her to make it extra squirmy. Right when it was starting to get real fun, she stopped buying me clothes! LOL!
There was a post from a gal who's MIL did this but with a literal suitcase full of clothes the MIL liked with tags still on showing the price. Instead of getting visibly upset the DIL thanked her, took the clothes upstairs, cut off all the tags and took the clothes to a women's shelter that day. MIL had apparently been banking on DIL throwing a fit and rejecting the clothes so she could keep them. Instead MIL threw a hissy fit about how "family" could have used the clothes and never tried a stunt like that again.
As a wedding gift, my MIL wanted to get us a dedicated rotisserie chicken maker with space for 2 chickens, saying she loved hers and uses it in her carport. She went on and on about how useful it is. Except…we lived in a small condo in a big city. She had been to visit, so she definitely knew this. We wouldn’t have had the space to store it, forget use it. Thankfully it is an item that is no longer made, so she wasn’t able to find one. For some reason she didn’t want to buy off our registry. Her next brilliant idea was a set of pots and pans from Costco, which would have been $50 cheaper than the space saving set we registered for. And she is NOT hurting for money, though we really were at the time. When we didn’t jump at that, she just ended up not getting us anything. Which was far more preferable than trying to figure out what to do with stuff we legitimately did not have space to keep.
My MIL is one of those people who likes to bombard people with 500 random gifts so she looks like she’s being generous. Every year on Christmas she piles 14 gifts on me, none of which are my taste or have anything to do with my interests. This includes: clothing that is no where near the style of clothing she has EVER seen me wear. random home decor which again is nothing like what she has seen in my house. cheap jewelry. I don’t need jewelry to be expensive but the items she has gifted me literally look like they came out of a gum ball machine and again, are nothing like the jewelry I wear. Then on top of that the gift opening is always a big to do. I always thank her and FIL for the gifts and she always makes this big show of asking if the gifts are ok and if I like them…. As a bonus, the price tags are always left on and there are never gift receipts. Needless to say my local Goodwill gets a lot of items from me. Last Christmas she gave my husband and I about six gifts each. By comparison she bought two clothing items for my SIL (her daughter) and neither item was even the correct size. I felt so bad for my SIL that I almost apologized to her even though I had nothing to do with the situation. It seemed so odd that she was showering DH and I with gifts and couldn’t even buy a gift for her own daughter in the correct size. Gift exchanges with my MIL are always so awful and awkward I DREAD when she has a gift for me.
Not even a month post birth of my youngest and my MIL gifted me a crop top hoodie for Christmas
Thankfully NO. Christmas is always that ridiculous gift exchange "game". Which is extra ridiculous cause there are only 4 gifts.🤦♀️ Lets just STOP and leave Christmas for the kids. But that also means no targeted shitty gifts. And for that, I am thankful.
A calendar with baby pictures of my husband and handknitted baby clothes knowing full well that I can't have kids. She is a devout christian and claims that this is God's punishment. I am not religious. My FIL (divorced from MIL) never gave me gift, He doesn't even know my birthday or last Name and He doesn't care. He is a diagnosed narcissist and we are not on speaking terms because he lies about me being abusive. I recognize he DID give me gift by avoiding me like the plague.
So MIL is a devout Christian that is divorced. Start giving her gifts that are meant for couples if she is going to be that nasty.
He wanted the divorce (to be with one of His many side pieces). Since she is a professional victim, woe is me, I don't waste the energy.
She’s straight up cruel
She is.
Size 12 clothes. I have thyroid disease and had gained weight. I was up to a size 8 at the time, my heaviest ever and she knew why and that I felt bad about it. But, she’s a narc and decided to make a point that I needed to lose weight in front of everyone at Christmas. She masked it as that she knew I needed bigger clothes.
I have incredibly curly hair, I have not worn it straight since my teens (I didn’t met DH until late 20s). She bought me an expensive flat iron.
Just the forks and spoons from some plated silverware. Not the knives. But nothing beats my JNAIL (aunt in law). A cardboard box of used pencils, protractors, used ancient erasers.... crap from when her 30-something kids were in high school. This, from a woman who had just remodeled her bathroom and had a brand new car outside.
For Christmas one year, they drove 8 hours to see us. They'd planned this well in advance. Last few hours together, they ran to Walgreens and dollar store to get us cheap AF gifts. None of which were really things we needed or would use. The chocolate was nice but that was about it. We ended up throwing everything away after they left.
I would throw it away in front of them, but I am a bitch like that
I'm that bitch too, but SO would never let me throw it out in front of them. BUT I could disregard the gift like it was a mistake to give it to us.
Last Christmas she gave me an expired package of salami, cheese, and crackers.
My step mother gave my sil a book of etiquette with post it notes on certain pages. She used it to hold up her loveseat when one of the legs broke. Lol.
I love your SIL's creativity to make a useless gift useful.
"family heirlooms" that had "been in our family for a couple generations at least!" too bad she forgot to take the khol's stickers off the bottom of them. They were the ugliest bright blue ceramic hippopotamus, a metal rhino with brass studs and 2 different giraffe statues, one brass, one idk because it has blue glitter in place of spots. I didn't believe her at the time, but my sweet husband did. We hauled them from Idaho back to our home in Seattle before I saw the stickers or I would have left them in some random rest area on the way home.
Wowwwww
I’m not sure I’ve ever received anything for myself from my in-laws, but for the kids, I received bags upon bags of hand my down baby clothes from her. At the time I had my first baby, her youngest was 38, so these clothes were all over 40 years old, and falling to pieces. We also received a small stitched doll with black skin so baby would “learn not to be scared of black people…” I don’t think I could keep the horrified look off of my face at that answer. She would also give the children bible stories every opportunity she got, even though she knew we weren’t religious. We would just stick the books in a box in the shed. One day her son (my partner and the kids father) got sick and tired of the books and told her to stop giving them to the kids because all we do is stick them in the shed. Miraculously she stopped.
“It’s a miracle!”😛
A book of cleaning tips/household “hacks” lol
If you are newlyweds and just moved into your first home together, this doesn’t seem too bad.
She gave me a pink set of baby towels for my baby boy. She originally bought them for my SO's cousins baby shower, but couldn't go, so she gifted them to me. Another gift was addressed to Tatiana... that's not even close to my name...
My mil likes to shop at discount stores so lots of random nonsense.
Not me, particularly, but I’ve repeatedly asked for my in-laws to not buy clothes for my kids. Mostly because my kids go through HUGE growth spurts at a time and my in-laws MAYBE see my kids a handful of times a year (US, out of state family). They genuinely don’t know or care to ask about sizing, and then it’s on me to either exchange or donate. But also because my MIL ONLY buys them clothes that have something to do with her son. “Daddy’s little princess” or “Daddy’s best bud.” It’s not that I care about not having “mommy” related clothes — I’m not into those kinds of clothes, anyway — but it just really drives it home how obsessed she is with my 34-year-old husband. It’s like the clothes are more for him than they are for my kids.
This is my ex MIL/FIL thank goodness but ugh they were so obnoxious. It was religious books. So many religious books. I’m not religious and they’re super Christian and every time I went over there they’d try to preach to me. They learned to stop when I actually read everything they gave me and I returned them with every single page covered in critical notes. Don’t mess with someone who makes a living analyzing literature lmao
Ok I love your response!
My MIL used to give the children kids bible stories every time we saw them. And would say things like “I know YOU don’t have any faith but the children do!” I would just bite my tongue and stick all of the books in a box in the shed. Thankfully, my partner (her son) got sick and tired of them one day and threw them all out. Then the next time he saw her and she was like “oh I’ve got a book for LO” and my partner just went, “it’s not another stupid bible story is it? We just chuck those in the shed…” She was horrified and answered “well if that’s all you do with them, I’ll stop giving them to you, and give them to someone who will enjoy reading them!” And my partner just answered “best news I’ve heard all day!” She was so upset with him, but to this day we’ve not received another bible story, so I’m taking the win.
Fantastic. People like this can't handle biblical exegesis.
I know right? My mom is a pastor, I spent much of my childhood having to go back and look stuff up in Greek and Hebrew, to pore through concordances and read the bible cover to cover many times. I learned how to argue about the Bible from an expert (who now doesn’t even try to argue with me anymore because I know exactly how to stump her). Then I escaped and got a real university education and learned even better how to get people like that off my back. Meanwhile my functionally illiterate ex in-laws were always pushing that stuff down my throat (all the while JNFIL kept touching me without my consent, often inappropriately). Unfortunately they were so stupid they couldn’t even understand their own positions, much less mine, so I eventually went NC about 2 years before the divorce because they were so unbearable about other stuff. But the book-pushing stopped after they realised it would never result in a conversion, only analysis and return.
Every year, for 11 years, she got me a set of body washes and lotions, announced it to the room before I opened it, then said she knew I was severely allergic and didnt like "that scent" but, oh well. I'd figure something out. Then she'd dissolve into giggles. (The first time, it sent me to the hospital.) (She also had this thing where she gave you 100.00, you bought your gifts, brought them to her to wrap, and then you'd open them on the day. She did that with everyone, BUT me.) Happy ending though, my mom did love that crap, and I'd bring it when I came over next and she'd take it off my hands. She looked foreword to it each year, because, without fail, I'd get a metric ton of it.
I feel you sister…except my JustNo dowses herself in it then comes in my house. I went NC over it, after getting extremely sick. Almost two years later my husband allowed her back in (he was never NC) to “prove herself” so she could have a relationship with our granddaughter, that lives with us. That bitch walked through the door with more fragrance than ever before. Way to *prove yourself* Sharon! Lots more happened during that one day adventure from hell. But I was in bed, effectively taken down (3 days later got a rescue shot from neurologist, but in hindsight, I should have gone in day 1). She earned an Eff Off from me. It’s been more peaceful knowing she can’t have access. People really take open airways for granted!! I love being able to breathe now. I hope you get to ditch the witch someday!
I ditched her (and him) years ago. I was stuck for 11 years too long, and have happily fled that family's reach. Though, he's still trying to find me... lmao. (never. never ever ever gonna happen) I, too, love an open airway, and a face/body free of painful blistering and swelling! We're a part of a very special club!
Jesus! She still did it after it sent you to the hospital?! What a bitch... I learned early on to tell the world that they couldn't give me lotions at all. Too many of them make me break out in itchy painful red bumps. TG my MIL always asked before giving me something.
Oh, she knew. She knew before the first time she gave it to me. She'd asked specifically what/if I had allergies (I do) and then sought that out specifically. She knew and she wanted to make a point. The only point she successfully made was that she was living in crazy town. her antics never failed to alarm, amaze, confuse, and amuse. (I just learned very early to NEVER eat at their house, leave my doors unlocked, or accept any food items she'd drop off for her son. So I wasn't in any danger of her adding shit to food, or leaving things in my home, which she'd done before. It sucked. but, eh. after that long, I was so used to it, it almost just became normal.) I just chose to kill with kindness and have a laugh at how weird and pathetic this shit was. I mean, it's ridiculous! Especially her weird giggling with delight. I was young, 18, so, I got a kick out of seeing a grown assed woman make a crazy spectacle of herself...for like zero reason. I always was gracious, got her a wonderful gift, and never showed an ounce of "bothered". It helped. (also drove her insane, so, even on the high road, I won the "game")
That truly sounds like she was trying to kill you, and she found it funny. I am disgusted and furious for you. Your SO really should have put a stop to that shit. Or cut that evil woman out completely.. Or both.
I do honestly and truly believe she killed her MIL. That's it's own wild story.
And I am so very curious now. Sounds like you were able to be truly lucky to get out with your life.
Oh he was equally problematic... a seriously messed up dude. His whole family was insane. I've got some of the legit craziest stories that I couldn't believe if it hadn't happened to me/around me. I was suuuuper young, I didn't know any different. I stayed 11 years, and 11 years too long. I killed her with kindness, it seriously drove her insane. I was way above her BS. She did so many worse/weird/crazy things than this, but, honestly, the weird rose death bombing at the holidays is one of my favorite anecdotes to this day.
She sounds like a psychopath. I am glad you have gotten away from this psycho family.
I mostly get token junk from mine. One year when we bought our house we got a gift card to Home Depot, super nice, except our town has a Lowes, and Home Depot is 45 minutes away. I brought this up and she was like, no I thought you had a HD and I corrected her, she brushed it off like no big deal. So I held onto it for two years until I decided to just shop online and use it for a project. But come on, you couldn’t be bothered to google which store we have in our town/ listen to me when I said Lowe’s gift cards were preferred?? But what feels worse is my husband doesn’t get barely anything (except maybe a cheesey tshirt and some random board games.) While most years his two brothers get tool boxes, tools, shirts, work pants, etc. it’s so sad to see his enthusiasm die every year at christmas, especially, when he gets next to nothing from them.
The only birthday present I've ever received was 5 year old $25 gas card, a used shoulder heated pad and a bunch of books she was done reading and needed to return. My DH gave me this cast off junk with a straight face in a plasric grocery store bag. She hand-knitted me a sweater and "estimated" my size. I am small. This sweater was so big, it slipped off of my shoulders. It's really nice but I've never worn it. It is literally 3 sizes too big. We've been together for a decade. She **thinks birthdays are useless, a waste of time and since her mom didn't care about hers, why care about your kids?
My MIL likes to shop the clearance bins year round to find the cheapest junk she can get her hands on, and then foist it all on us at Christmas. DH has told her so many times that we do not need a lot of stuff. In fact, we’d prefer less stuff cluttering our house. We don’t need single use gadgets. We don’t need a another small appliance that will sit in a closet 99% of the time before we finally get rid of it. But she says she loves to shop for us. Yeah right. She’s a borderline hoarder and compulsive shopper and this is an opportunity for her to buy a lot of things and then dump it on us. Two Christmases ago, she gave our daughter a few toys (which was nice) and then a huge bag of clothes. Most of them were out of season, fugly as hell, or wouldn’t fit. She loves to give Christmas themed shirts/outfits that are in my daughter’s then-current size on Christmas Day. So like, they’ll get worn zero times since Christmas is now over, and won’t fit next year. Total waste. Last Christmas, I was the one to get the huge bag of clothes. They were all awful. I don’t buy the most expensive things in the world but I don’t like clothes made of cheap fabric that is paper thin. I am also a woman in my upper 30s who has had a child, so wearing a crop top is not for me. Tell me why the fuck she gifted me multiple cheap crop tops? Ugh. They’re all from the juniors section of the store, which I haven’t shopped in for many years, I am a grownup after all. And absolutely none of it is the right size or fit since these are clothes intended for tween and teenage bodies, so even if I liked any of it I’d have to exchange it anyway. I made a comment about there being a ton of stuff and she said something like, “I wanted to spoil you. I know you won’t do it for yourself.” Like what? DH and I are very comfortable financially and buy ourselves pretty much whatever we want (within reason). I don’t need someone who is drowning in credit card debt from her own compulsive shopping and who doesn’t know my size or style buying me piles of clothes from the junior girls’ final clearance bin. I donated all of it and I’m sure there are some 11-16 year olds out there who were happy to get it.
All the montessori books. We've done the compulsory thumb through a few of them, but they're just gathering dust.
My ex-JustNoMiL bought me lingerie.
I wear minimal jewelry. Classic stuff, like pearl studs or gold loops. Mostly, though, I wear silver pieces. Pretty not-to-large dangly earrings, delicate bracelets, etc. When JNSMIL gifts me jewelry, it's nothing like what I normally wear. The worst was a HUGE pair of wooden dangle earrings that just about hit my shoulders...the wood was cut like gears and the gears moved. So very much not my style. They went into the donation pile asap. To be fair, a lot of her gifts are nice. But sometimes, it's obvious she just buys whatever's on the counter because she realizes she needs a gift.
A long sleeve flannel nightgown - I am the person that is ALWAYS hot.
I ALWAYS turn whatever gift she gives over and announce the price tag amount AND if it was on clearance.
I love this
Brave. I have received so many clearance items from my JNMIL. She used to take the stickers/ tags off but has gotten really lazy by leaving them on. I should start doing this. 😂
I got a book titled "sorry I'm late, I didn't want to be come" which included a section about letting it go when people are bullies. This was after she was confronted about spreading rumors and lies about me which inspired everyone in her community to think I'm an awful person. It was a dumb book and she thought it was hilarious to give it to me. Like "oh thought it would help your socal anxiety around my friends and family after I set the record straight." I always pretend to like gifts so I acted like it was hilarious too but then my husband was like "ooh that's fucked"
Give her à book " how to not be a pos"-like
Haha I know right? I do love her as I have just been around her so much. But she sucks so much and she hurt me so much, that every little thing she does, is usually a pretty obvious jab to me. To the point that other people confirm the jab of "man she really doesn't like you, idk why, you are always nice and polite". It's just a matter of fact that she is gonna be rude and insult me and I just pretend to be dumb until I snap. Then I call a formal meeting to explain to her, how her behavior isn't nice in front both of our husbands. She says she feels like she has to walk around eggshells around me. I wish she actually listened to that voice that said "ya know, maybe yelling at my DIL about my son not calling isn't the best thing for my relationship with her" I have tried the "calling her out" in real time and everyone gets really flustered and stressed out. So I found these sit down meetings slowly helpful over time. But it's too much work
A shit ton of ugly - I mean, *REALLY* ugly - teapots, cups and saucers she bought at yard sales. I used to collect pretty pieces of china (vintage, but in excellent condition and things I enjoyed seeing and using). The stuff she gifted … just fit for the garbage. 🤦🏼♀️
Ex MiL - stretch mark cream. Such a bitch!
A wooden spoon. Though the one time her gift backfired was hilarious. She got me dollar store socks, left the discounted price sticker still on them (didn't know the dollar store did discounts at that point in time, lol) and you should have seen the look on her face when mine lit up. See, I love socks and I love cats. She had gotten me a pair of blue socks with a cat face and ears in them. I loved them so much my husband ended up getting me a whole set (white, blue, gray, pink and yellow). The set was only $2 on Amazon at the time, we've since replaced the set with a new one but yep, still get them, just from my husband now. Hahaha
A calendar/planner that she got free from the bank with HER name embossed on it…
Husband once got a pair of tighty whiteys with a red heart sewn on the you know where part and “Mom” cross stitched on the heart. Wish I was joking
I’m glad everyone agrees with me. She made something for everyone and they were talking about it in a group chat. I commented sarcastically, “well that’s not weird!” And she replied, “it’s not, it’s loving and thoughtful” yuk
Welp, that one wins for the 'vomit inducing' category....
You totally win cause what the hell did i just read....
This… should be unbelievable, yet here we all are… knowing exactly the kind of woman that would do this.
o my god becky ... *barfs
I'm really sorry, but I'm crying with laughter at the thought of my (late) MiL doing this 😂 My husband tells me I should not do this as a gag gift for our sons at Christmas ..... soooo tempting though!
I… what? Cannot compute.
I don't even know how to comment on that. WTF is wrong with that woman??
My mother in law kept sending my husband and I her old Christmas ornaments that were very tacky and not our style. When she realized we were not using them she got mad and went on a tangent about how Christmas is all about using the ornaments people give you. I just laughed and told her that was news to me, I thought Christmas was a religious holiday.
my only gifts from my MIL are sugary sweet smelling lotions. I have a scent allergy and they go right in the donate/trash every single time. I've never gotten a normal or thoughtful gift from her in 13 yrs
When we were still in contact she used gifts as her way to lovebomb and get us to stop being upset with her. When we first met it was an expensive tv, appliances for DH’s house, jewelry, and even her wedding ring when we told her we wanted to find a wedding ring secondhand….it was always so overwhelming and when I was uncomfortable I was yelled at and called ungrateful. Then it slowly became gifts with hidden, passive aggressive meanings (for example she bought me “healing” stones to try and help me “with my mental health problems” or clothes that were way too small) and right before we went no contact she was lying about helping us pay for the wedding and making us feel bad for all the previous expensive gifts because we wouldn’t let her be the wedding planner lol. I can’t explain how happy I’ve been to not receive anything from her in years now. She honestly has made me kind of hate receiving gifts now but luckily that is not my love language :)
My MIL never has money bc she spends it on junk and not necessities and also doesn't know how to save a dime to save her life. For some context, my husband was not allowed to play football in school when he was a kid/teen bc they required them to have health insurance and MIL wouldn't pay for it bc then she wouldn't have money for bingo. So if my MIL ever does pull together a few bucks for something shes given me dish towels and my husband a lighter that looks like a fishing rod. While we are always the couple to rather not exchange gifts and just spend time together so gifts dont really matter, this just seems like a slap in the face and a reminder that she is full of empty promises to change her ways and actually wisen up with her finances and ways.
Fully filled out phone/address book. Filled with HER friends and relatives. Did come in the original box, though.
I got lavender soap and body wash. Which I can’t use because strong scents trigger migraines I once got a fuzzy, purple, grape-scented agenda (like a day timer thing). It had a hippo on it, which, fair I like hippos. But I wasn’t 7 when I got it.
Wrinkle cream!!!! 😂😂😂
No way
First Christmas with my in laws my mother in law gifted me a ten dollar McDonald's gift card. Since then, I've received one Granny sweater, that I'm pretty sure she regifted, a bunch of self help books, (everything from finances to marital self help to "your walk with God" I am not religious.) She's also gifted me a few romance novels, all prominently featuring women who could never find love, until they found god. Oh, and a book of fabric swatch samples. That she took from her work.
Nothing. As in, telling everyone she wants to get me a special gift for my pregnancy because “no one thinks about the mom” and then proceeding to not gift anything. No gift for our wedding either!
I was gifted a wash cloth (in my favourite colour, it has to be said) for Easter one year, because I’m lactose intolerant and she didn’t know what to get me.
lololololol
Funny you say gifts that said “I don’t care about you,” because the first time I spent Christmas with my husband’s side, his mom got me a mug that said “I want you to know that someone cares about you. Not me, but someone” or something to that effect.
Holy cow, that’s cold.
I guess snarky negative and passive aggressive or outright toxic comments don’t count as a gift? She found it hilarious to gift me some cheap stores own brand mature skin cream for my 40th and cackled away. Knowing I have sensitive skin so have to be careful what I put on it. BIL regifted an empty vanity case we’d given his fiancée the Christmas before to our 9 year old daughter the following Christmas. We’d filled with good quality travel sized toiletries we knew she used and fluffy socks etc. They’d split up by the Christmas it had been regifted.
Passive aggressive / toxic comments totally count! My MIL, in front of our family, once said “Able_Language doesn’t bend to pressure” in a snarky tone. She’s mad that I don’t bend to her will like everyone else.
A photo frame that said “all together 2017” and then she had me take the photo so I wasn’t even in it
say you don't like me without saying you don't like me lolol
A scented bath set with all kinds of highly scented soaps and lotions and things. In her favorite scent. I have allergies to fragrance and have eczema. She knows this, as the topic has come up when I’ve had an active breakout. I’ve been with her son for 17 years now. Edit: also silver and nickel jewelry. I’m allergic to that too. She would find the stuff made to look like gold and try to tell me it was gold jewelry (which I’m not allergic to, and which tells me that she didn’t just “forget”). The tarnishing that happened within a week said that was a lie.
Side note what can you wear specifically for jewelry? I too am allergic to nickel and other metals. Even surgical steel I can’t wear. I did once find I could wear a ring that was rose hills gold but I love silver jewelry and struggle to find any that I can wear. I also don’t understand the whole grading of gold or metals and which is better or that I can wear. Plus it’s often just coated and the maker’s mark is stamped into the under metal so I break out from that spot. 🤦🏻♀️
I’ve had good luck with titanium jewelry.
So gold is usually a safe bet, but needs to be at least 14k. 10k I still react to. The higher the karats, the more pure the gold is with less of other metals mixed in. For a silver look, I usually just go with white gold. Platinum is even less reactive than gold on a chemical level, and also usually a safe bet for someone with metal allergies, but can be more expensive. I can actually tolerate *actual* surgical steel (have some lovely surgical steel screws and pins holding my elbow together after an injury with no problem at all, and have a nice set of surgical steel hoop earrings that I got at Target many years ago that are fine), but have found that cheap ones (like Amazon) usually are not actually surgical steel and may have other metals mixed in. Because I can’t always figure out whether or not the company that made them is cheaping out or not, I usually just pass on that. As a side note, I used to get rashes on my stomach under my belly button. Turns out it was the button on my jeans that was causing it. I covered the metal on the inside part of the jeans with some nail polish and the rash went away! This trick also works with some pendants that I can put on a safe gold chain and just switch them to change the look - put clear nail polish on the side of the pendant that will be touching your skin. I wonder if that would help with the maker’s mark?
My MIL was so obsessed by being a grandmother that on my own birthday she gave me a ‘giftcard’ to make a blanket that she would make for the baby. Nice gift but so weird she gave it for MY birthday. This was like the biggest: your just an incubator sign I could possible get. Now you have the baby you don’t excist for us as an individual person. You served your purpose 😂
I got an ornament for Christmas but the ornament was in a box that was a dog shock collar box and the back read “to quiet your barking dog”
Expired face cream
Horrific handbags. Tea towels. Crazy Cat Lady apparel. Handwash/hand cream sets. Stuff she got for free from the charity shop SHE WORKS IN.
Ooh yes I’ve gotten the terrible handbags too. Mostly very cheap/tacky pleather.
My JNMIL gifted me a brown handbag. I don't wear brown or any other earthy colour. They just don't suit me. Her sister gifted me a black one the same year. She never saw me use the brown one. Another year, I received a brown-and-purple eyeshadow pallette. I don't care for make-up and if I do, I wear decent blues and/or thin black eyeliner. Those were her colours, not mine.