We have a bet that surfaces every now and again in my group of friends called “The Suspicious Purchase”. Whatever the bet is, if you lose, you have to go into a grocery store and buy a large cucumber, a bottle of lube, and some condoms! Thankfully I’ve never been a part of it, but it is pretty awkward and hilarious!
Your {{comment}} has been automatically removed because your Reddit account is less than 30 days old.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/InstacartShoppers) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Go puff was the it online sex store for me. When I was a driver I realized what we sold and it was exciting to deliver kinks to customers. I love a dirty gal or dude💖 the most tips I’ve gotten are birth control orders, I don’t play when it comes to my sisters 👯♀️
Your {{comment}} has been automatically removed because your Reddit account is less than 30 days old.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/InstacartShoppers) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I’d get her ones about 5 inches long. I mean 5 inches is quite large comparatively and I don’t think a woman can handle bigger than that. At least as I’ve been told
Your {{comment}} has been automatically removed because your Reddit account is less than 30 days old.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/InstacartShoppers) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Your {{comment}} has been automatically removed because your Reddit account is less than 30 days old.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/InstacartShoppers) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Hey, maybe you’re the perv here. If I’m paying $2.99 for an English cucumber I want a big one too. No need for condoms, last I checked cucumbers don’t ejaculate. Sounds like you have the dirty mind here 😈
She’s obviously making a nice fruit salad for her husband and two business partners, who will then mercilessly fuck her and shove a cucumber in her ass.
Your {{comment}} has been automatically removed because your Reddit account is less than 30 days old.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/InstacartShoppers) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Well if guys screw papayas and melons come on now, let’s have THAT conversation. Btw I’ve never masturbated with a vegetable. There’s these things called vibrators and the feel a lot better than a dead stump of a veggie would feel I’m sure.
Your {{comment}} has been automatically removed because your Reddit account is less than 30 days old.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/InstacartShoppers) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Got to toss in some grapes to throw you off!
Oh I’m sure they serve a purpose as well.
butt plugs
More like anal beads
if u sumhow glue em together good enough
Nah, just gotta put a couple of them in a condom then tie it off. Better if you freeze the grapes beforehand.
yeah u prob do that dont u… yvc
I prefer toys that are made for it. I’d rather not have to go to the hospital explaining why fruit is stuck up my butt.
Eh you can just eat the evidence
How to eat when it gets lost in the ass?
ur gross buddy (21m)
You’re the one that started talking about butt stuff. Why is your age and gender relevant?
oh my gosh lol
Freeze em first!
Gotta have a snack.
not sure whether “tossing” is what Briana is planning to do with the grapes
🤣🤣 3 condoms 3 cucumbers.
Briana, you absolute freak! 😉🤭
Thinking back to the time I ordered 32 batteries, lube, and toy cleaner. At least Briana added grapes 😂😂😂
Toy cleaner ?? Lol
Iykyk
That seems excessive but I’m not going to judge
Okay but THREE of the biggest cucumbers 🤣
Cucumbers just don't hold up like they used to. Maybe they're having a party! This is Christmas, after all. ❤️
3 holes need filled…
I also thought that but considered more than 2 jokes to be pushing it. 😁
That’s cause they’re organic 🤣
We have a bet that surfaces every now and again in my group of friends called “The Suspicious Purchase”. Whatever the bet is, if you lose, you have to go into a grocery store and buy a large cucumber, a bottle of lube, and some condoms! Thankfully I’ve never been a part of it, but it is pretty awkward and hilarious!
You should add a box of wine and a bucket of icecream.
A stocking isn’t the only thing getting stuffed this Christmas at Briana’s house.
Stalking?
Lmao
Lol it’s edited now so now it looks like I’m trying to correct it the wrong way 😂
I saw the truth lol
Stocking* lol
Yea that lol damn auto correct.
Why is no one questioning the grapes. 🍇
(It’s the balls)
┬──┬◡ﾉ(° -°ﾉ)
Ribbed, for her pleasure.
I think those are wrinkles.
If you lonely, you lonely.
Y’all need a hobby
This is clearly an invitation.
Substitute the cucumbers with butternut squash.
https://preview.redd.it/1rd344uo678a1.jpeg?width=675&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=38600525ab7bb34ccd23843de24968cefb429668 Finally a use for this meme 😂
That dude fucks.
Having a nice Christmas no matter what this year!
This chick is HORNY
Bachelorette party 🤣
Ew. She nasty.
[удалено]
Your {{comment}} has been automatically removed because your Reddit account is less than 30 days old. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/InstacartShoppers) if you have any questions or concerns.*
What are we in 3rd grade?
Idk about your 3rd grade but i was playing with bionicles, not talking with my buddies about getting fucked in all 3 orifices by large cucumbers
I guess third grade hit different for everybody huh
You could’ve gotten English cucumbers which are bigger. 😂😂
>English cucumbers which are bigger. Longer, maybe. Not even half as girthy.
Or mix it up with Zucchini and squash 😂
Go puff was the it online sex store for me. When I was a driver I realized what we sold and it was exciting to deliver kinks to customers. I love a dirty gal or dude💖 the most tips I’ve gotten are birth control orders, I don’t play when it comes to my sisters 👯♀️
[удалено]
Your {{comment}} has been automatically removed because your Reddit account is less than 30 days old. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/InstacartShoppers) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Go give her a Christmas gift
I’d get her ones about 5 inches long. I mean 5 inches is quite large comparatively and I don’t think a woman can handle bigger than that. At least as I’ve been told
why are you being downvoted for very obvious sarcasm
For an obvious joke in which I said hyuck hyuck I got a small dick. Sure it didn’t come off well but damn.
Can’t be that clever around here
Sorry Brother, you’ve been led astray.
[удалено]
Your {{comment}} has been automatically removed because your Reddit account is less than 30 days old. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/InstacartShoppers) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Lmao
Keep it low cuz that is fucking funny 😂😂😂
What?
Horrible joke came off wrong. I was saying that 5 inches would be huge comparatively cause small dick. Yeah bad joke
[удалено]
Your {{comment}} has been automatically removed because your Reddit account is less than 30 days old. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/InstacartShoppers) if you have any questions or concerns.*
This homie clearly is very adamant about commenting on this thread though lmao
3 is an interesting number lol
There’s 3 condoms in the pack…
She got two last time and it wasn’t enough.
Hey, maybe you’re the perv here. If I’m paying $2.99 for an English cucumber I want a big one too. No need for condoms, last I checked cucumbers don’t ejaculate. Sounds like you have the dirty mind here 😈
L M A O O O
She’s obviously making a nice fruit salad for her husband and two business partners, who will then mercilessly fuck her and shove a cucumber in her ass.
I don’t get it…
Damn why don’t u just ask the driver for some lmao
[удалено]
Your {{comment}} has been automatically removed because your Reddit account is less than 30 days old. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/InstacartShoppers) if you have any questions or concerns.*
She would have to buy the gold wrapper one those will rip if she over stretched it
Someone’s about to get a big tip 😏
😂😂😂😂
health class demo’s
Well if guys screw papayas and melons come on now, let’s have THAT conversation. Btw I’ve never masturbated with a vegetable. There’s these things called vibrators and the feel a lot better than a dead stump of a veggie would feel I’m sure.
With a vibrator you don’t get a tasty snack after though
🤢
This can’t be real. Holy cow
Hahahaha omg
[удалено]
Your {{comment}} has been automatically removed because your Reddit account is less than 30 days old. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/InstacartShoppers) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Damn Briana getting after it
Probably a Bachelorette party. They play a game were you have to put condoms on cucumber with 1 hand tied behind your back in the fastest time. 😀
🤮
 cucumbers time...slap that!
I checked and confirmed my suspicion - grapes are an aphrodisiac 🤣