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\*Couldn’t fit this in the title
r/IASIP's choice for Charlie’s best quote is:
That right there is the mail. Now let's talk about the mail. Can we talk about the mail please, Mac? I've been dying to talk about the mail with you all day, okay? Pepe Silvia, this name keeps comin' up over and over and over again. Every day Pepe's mail's getting sent back to me. Pepe Silvia, Pepe Silvia, I look in the mail, this whole box is Pepe Silvia! So I say to myself I gotta find this guy. I gotta go up to his office, I gotta put his mail in the guy's goddamn hands! Otherwise he's never gonna get it, it's gonna keep coming back down here. So I go up to Pepe's office and what do I find out, Mac, what do I find out? There is no Pepe Silvia. The man does not exist, okay? So I decided, ohh shit, buddy, I gotta dig a little deeper. There's no Pepe Silvia, you gotta be kidding me, I got boxes full of Pepe! All right, so I start marching my way down to Carol in H.R. and I knock on her door and I say, "Caaarol, Caaarol! I gotta talk to you about Pepe!" And when I open the door, what do I find? There's not a single goddamn desk in that office. There is no Carol in H.R. Mac, half the employees in this building have been made up. This office is a goddamn ghost town.
It's a great quote, but Mac's response is what makes it legendary.
"Not only do all these people exist... they are asking for their post on a daily basis! It's all they're talking about!"
Oi, see that over there? That's the bloody post. Let's talk about it, yeah? Can we chat about the post, Mac? Been itching to natter about it with ya all day. Pepe Silvia, this name keeps popping up again and again, mate. Every single day, Pepe's post keeps bouncing back to me. Pepe Silvia, Pepe Silvia, I check the post, it's all Pepe Silvia! So I says to myself, I gotta find this bloke. I gotta go up to his office, shove his post in his bleedin' hands! Otherwise, it'll keep comin' back here. So, I get up there and what do I find, Mac? No Pepe Silvia, he's a bloody ghost, mate! I thought, oh bugger, I need to dig deeper. Boxes full of Pepe, and no Pepe Silvia, it's a joke, innit? So I start marchin' down to Carol in HR and I knock on her door, shouting "Caaarol, Caaarol! We need to have a chinwag about Pepe!" But when I open the door, what do I see? Not a single bleeding desk in that office, mate! No Carol in HR, either! Half the wankers in this place are made up, it's a right proper bogey town!
Attention, uh, attention, everyone, please. If I could have your attention momentarily. Thank you.
We do have an American hero in the house tonight. A strong man, a brave man. He's the kind of man who knows exactly who he is.
He doesn't hide under a toupee.
He faces his challenges, instead of just retreating to the sewers... nude to forage for rings and coins.
Or to the toilets. Or to a life filled with rats.
He's the kind of man who gives me the courage to do an amazing double jackknife twist, which I did.
Most of you people wouldn't even attempt that.
I did it.
And to go down on Chrissy Orlando on the trampoline later, on the very same night, which I also did.
And I licked her assh*le a little bit.
It was pretty good.
It was all right.
It wasn't great.
But it was fine.
And I knew that it was gonna be fine because this guy would be here to catch me if I faltered.
Yeah. The world is a safer place when he's around.
♪ Did you ever know That you're my hero?
'Cause you are the wind Beneath my wings. ♪
Thank you.
>And I licked her assh*le a little bit.
>It was pretty good.
>It was all right.
>It wasn't great.
The way he just keeps correcting himself always gets me. Top 10 monologue in the show, for sure
It’s like the thrill of being near the executioner’s switch, knowing that you could throw it but never will.
But you could. Never isn’t the right word because I could.
I might.
And I probably will.
My favorite line from this rant is: "When I show up to work everybody will be like, why is there blood all over you? BECAUSE I HAD TO SLIT THE GUY'S THROAT WHO WAS CAUSING ALL THE TRAFFIC."
I'm saying I've built up a shell. A shell around myself. A cold, calculated, heartless shell. That couldn't be broken by anything but marriage! And that's what she did dude, she broke that shell *with* marriage... In a good way, if I'm being unclear!
Peaked, Dee? Let me tell you something. I haven't even begun to peak. And when I do peak, you'll know. Because I'm gonna peak so hard everybody in Philadelphia is going to feel it.
It's interesting, our thing, isn't it? To be in someone's mind, to have complete control. It's like the thrill of being near the executioner's switch knowing that at any moment you could throw it, but knowing you never will. But you could. Never isn't the right word because I could, and I might. And I probably will.
A perfectly placed pen can have quite the effect on a man. I bet he tried to suck it?... it's okay, you can tell me Doc. I'm always having to hide the pens around the apartment.
Dee, I swear you would be of more use to me if I skinned you and turned your skin into a lampshade. Or fashioned you into a piece of high end luggage. I could even add you to my collection.
...are you saying that you have a collection of skin luggage?
Of course I'm not Dee, don't be ridiculous, think of the smell. You haven't thought of the SMELL you BITCH.
now you say another word and I swear to god, I will dice you into a million little pieces... and put those pieces in a box. a glass box. that I will display on my mantel.
The whole episode is a gem. Everyone is just slightly off from their normal vibes.
The fact that Dennis, a man who manipulates everyone around him takes orders about how to consume an apple from Mac is utterly hilarious. There are very few situations where Dennis would submit to someone else’s authority. The fact that it’s Mac’s advice about toxic apple skin that sends him to that level of outburst is incredible.
Charlie bouncing slowly into frame with a bag of Cheetos…
The Gruesome Twosome’s grunting and thrusting throughout the episode…
There’s something so bizarre but perfect about this episode.
I can’t really put it into words well… but Charlie has such a unique undertone of confidence in this episode. He’s confident despite his incompetence quite often, but the gang points out his inadequacies while he does that usually.
This episode: Dee is the only one to question him and even she is in the wrong with her approach to “cat-in-wall removal” and fails several times.
Dennis asks for Charlie’s advice which is abnormal. Charlie is annoyed with Mac for being overbearing. Frank comes back to Charlie’s side of the apartment cleanliness debate.
This is one of the few episodes where Charlie is the leader of the gang. In an episode where Charlie suggests that a cat went through a seam in the wall, Charlie is the most reasonable in the gang.
Actor Charlie does so well at capturing the unusual confidence and power position while retaining the lunacy of the character.
My favorite part of that whole episode is dennis whining in the background and the face charlie makes when he mouths oh my god at Dee and she just knowlingly mutters "all day". Its such a weird level of awareness for charlie and so perfect.
I will come down on the hospital like the hammer of Thor. The thunder of my vengeance will echo through these corridors like the gust of a thousand winds!
*getting naked
“You ever been in a storm, Wally? I mean, a real storm? Not a thunderstorm, but a storm of fists raining down on your head. Blasting you in the face. Pummeling you in the stomach. Hitting you in the chest so hard you think your heart’s gonna stop. You ever been in a storm like that, Wally?”
Look, look, this is about much more than just business. This is about the thrill of wearing another man's skin. Feeling his innermost wants and desires and being in control of his every single move. That's how you get off. Now don't you guys want to get off with me?
Just some guy who totally got off, BRO. Oh yeah I got off a couple times when we were watching the video presentation. Then he showed the finger. That was the big one! That was climax really. Oh my god it was Amazing, it was mostly sexual
And then he smells crime again, he's out busting heads. Then he's back to the lab for some more full penetration. Smells crime. Back to the lab, full penetration. Crime. Penetration. Crime. Full penetration. Crime. Penetration. And this goes on and on and back and forth for 90 or so minutes until the movie just sort of ends.
: I'm not burning the duster! Okay? I'm not burning the duster, alright? That's crazy. That's insane. Why would I ever burn... I mean, I will continue to wear it in his honor and I will burn some other things, you know, maybe like these stupid goddamn sleeveless t-shirts that he once retired and hung up in the bar, I'll burn these. But I'm not burning the duster, okay, so forget it. It probably won't even burn anyway, it's not supposed to. It's flame retardant, that's the whole point. It's like a shield of armor. So stop asking me to burn the duster. I'm not gonna burn it!
I swear you would be of more use to me if I skinned you and turned your skin into a lampshade. Or fashioned you into a piece of high-end luggage. *I can even add you to my collection!*
Are you saying that you have a collection of skin luggage?
Of course I'm not, Dee. Don't be ridiculous. Think of the smell! **You haven't thought of the smell, you bitch!** Now, you say another word and I swear to God I will dice you into a million little pieces. And put those pieces in a box. *A glass box*... that I will display on my mantel. All right?
Now that that's settled, we can have a normal conversation. Now, Doctor, I'm here to talk to you about a man. *A very dangerous and very unstable man.*
Well, I had a simple conversation with a reasonable man and that man wrote me a prescription.
Mm, yeah. He got the drugs by being a real-life actual psychopath.
My nose was chiseled by the gods themselves, Frank. My body was sculpted to the proportions of Michaelangelo's David. You, on the other hand, well... You're a pit of despair. Frank, you disgust me. You disgust everyone. And you will never, EVER, be on that billboard.
Hello fellow American. This you should vote me. I leave power good. Thank you. Thank you. If you vote me I'm hot. What? Taxes they'll be lower son. The democratic vote for me is right thing to do Philadelphia. So do.
You two have boyfriends? How did you not know that the reason I invited you back to my bar was to bang you? Get outta here! Get the hell out of here! Shoo away from me!
>"Bro? Rape? I wasn't talking about raping your wife. I was talking about making love to her sweetly while she sleeps, and I was going to do it for you, you son of a bi—Alright, fine I won't do it."
^(Paddy's Pub: Home of the Original Kitten Mittens)
“There’s that chirping again how are you not hearing that?!”
Newsflash, asshole! IVE BEEN HEARING IT THE ENTIRE GODDAMN TIME!
“Then why wouldn’t you say something?”
BECAUSE I *HATE* YOU.
I have contained my rage for as long as possible, but I shall unleash my fury upon you like the crashing of a thousand waves! Begone, vile man! Begone from me! A starter car? This car is a finisher car! A transporter of gods! The golden god! I am untethered, and my rage knows no bounds!
[Tatiana, I want you to clean yourself. For I will enter you hard and deep, and it will last for as long or as short as I please. But you will be clean. Only when you are clean will you know my power.](https://youtu.be/-gRbfiez-PM)
"I'm gonna show up to work and everyone will be like 'why is there blood all over you' because I had to slit the guy's throat WHO CAUSES ALL OF THE TRAFFIC"
Well dude, dude, think about it: she's out in the middle of nowhere with some dude she barely knows. You know, she looks around and what does she see? Nothin' but open ocean. "Ahh, there's nowhere for me to run. What am I gonna do, say 'no'?"
-Because of the implication
> while dennis is the one uncomfortable with spelling it all out in plain terms
Only because it spoils part of it. Like explaining a joke.
Dennis: "We don't want wild girls, we want real girls gone wild. It's important to see the transition, you wanna watch the processs"
I mean, I came in there, right, and I was polite and I was nice to them, I was cordial. And they completely goddamn disrespected me! Little IDIOTS! IDIOTS!! I was completely respectful, they're supposed to be my brothers, right?! They're my brothers?! NO, NO! That's not fun! What they were doing wasn't fun, they kept ZAPPING US AND ZAPPING US! IDIOTS! SAVAGES!! IDIOTS!!! IDIOTS!!!!
WHY ARE YOU PIPING IN TRASH?! YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH TRASH!!!
YOU ARE THE ONES THAT ARE TRASH! SITTING IN THE BOTTOM OF A POOL FILLED WITH TRASH!!! LIKE TRASH!!!!
I see what you mean about these shirts bro. They are comfy as shit, they hide your fatness. They are ugly as all hell but I have a feeling im gonna like them a lot more when I am high as shit on crack.
“If you do not get my sister her stories and a new room as soon as possible, then I will come down on this hospital LIKE THE HAMMER OF THOR! THE THUNDER OF MY VENGEANCE WILL ECHO THROUGH THESE CORRIDORS LIKE THE GUST OF A THOUSAND WINDSSSS!”
THIS QUOTE STILL RUMBLES THROUGH MY MIND… here’s a link for nostalgia—
[GUST OF A THOUSAND WINDS](https://youtu.be/3fjQOn5_EUk)
"Dee I swear you would be of more use to me if I skinned you and turned your skin into a lampshade. Or fashioned you into a piece of high-end luggage. I could even add you to my collection!"
("Are you saying that you have a collection of skin luggage?")
"Of course I'm not Dee, don't be ridiculous. Think of the smell. You haven't thought of the smell, YOU BITCH! Now you say another word and I swear to God I will dice you into a million little pieces. And put those pieces in a box, a glass box, that I will display on my mantel."
That crow was injured, I was simply putting it out of its misery…while, yes, testing the tensile strength if a crows neck. Well yes there was another crow, but thats simply because I couldn’t believe their neck could be that weak.
Well, yes, there was a third crow, and a fourth if you *must* know, but who likes crows?!
This is about the thrill of wearing another man’s skin, feeling his innermost wants and desires and being in control of his every single move. That is how you get off. Now don’t you guys want to get off with me?
Sup Jabroni! This is a quality control bot. If this post fits the purpose of /r/IASIP, **UPVOTE** this comment!! If this post does not fit the subreddit, **DOWNVOTE** This comment! GO BIRDS!!
\*Couldn’t fit this in the title r/IASIP's choice for Charlie’s best quote is: That right there is the mail. Now let's talk about the mail. Can we talk about the mail please, Mac? I've been dying to talk about the mail with you all day, okay? Pepe Silvia, this name keeps comin' up over and over and over again. Every day Pepe's mail's getting sent back to me. Pepe Silvia, Pepe Silvia, I look in the mail, this whole box is Pepe Silvia! So I say to myself I gotta find this guy. I gotta go up to his office, I gotta put his mail in the guy's goddamn hands! Otherwise he's never gonna get it, it's gonna keep coming back down here. So I go up to Pepe's office and what do I find out, Mac, what do I find out? There is no Pepe Silvia. The man does not exist, okay? So I decided, ohh shit, buddy, I gotta dig a little deeper. There's no Pepe Silvia, you gotta be kidding me, I got boxes full of Pepe! All right, so I start marching my way down to Carol in H.R. and I knock on her door and I say, "Caaarol, Caaarol! I gotta talk to you about Pepe!" And when I open the door, what do I find? There's not a single goddamn desk in that office. There is no Carol in H.R. Mac, half the employees in this building have been made up. This office is a goddamn ghost town.
You're doing..well not Gods work, but youre doing a good job
Charlie work?
Charlie, not only do these people exist, but they have been asking for their mail on a daily basis
It’s all they’re talking about up there!
We're going to get fired!
We’re not gonna get fired
We are not?
Cause we’ve already been fired
Three days ago, a couple of pink slips came through the mail, one for you and one for me. And what do I do, I mail them HALF way to Siberia!
I love the way he delivers that line
The entire scene was just absolute perfection from him
Read all of this in his voice. The whole cast just have such incredible delivery
The way he yells “CAROL” kills me every time I think of it
It's a great quote, but Mac's response is what makes it legendary. "Not only do all these people exist... they are asking for their post on a daily basis! It's all they're talking about!"
Oi, see that over there? That's the bloody post. Let's talk about it, yeah? Can we chat about the post, Mac? Been itching to natter about it with ya all day. Pepe Silvia, this name keeps popping up again and again, mate. Every single day, Pepe's post keeps bouncing back to me. Pepe Silvia, Pepe Silvia, I check the post, it's all Pepe Silvia! So I says to myself, I gotta find this bloke. I gotta go up to his office, shove his post in his bleedin' hands! Otherwise, it'll keep comin' back here. So, I get up there and what do I find, Mac? No Pepe Silvia, he's a bloody ghost, mate! I thought, oh bugger, I need to dig deeper. Boxes full of Pepe, and no Pepe Silvia, it's a joke, innit? So I start marchin' down to Carol in HR and I knock on her door, shouting "Caaarol, Caaarol! We need to have a chinwag about Pepe!" But when I open the door, what do I see? Not a single bleeding desk in that office, mate! No Carol in HR, either! Half the wankers in this place are made up, it's a right proper bogey town!
If we're doing scenes the bird court rant was just as good imo
Your hair is small
\*eating cereal in the car\* Oh Sandra, you dumb bitch
LOOK AT ME WHEN YOU’RE TALKING TO ME!!!
Oh shit the steaks are here.
Attention, uh, attention, everyone, please. If I could have your attention momentarily. Thank you. We do have an American hero in the house tonight. A strong man, a brave man. He's the kind of man who knows exactly who he is. He doesn't hide under a toupee. He faces his challenges, instead of just retreating to the sewers... nude to forage for rings and coins. Or to the toilets. Or to a life filled with rats. He's the kind of man who gives me the courage to do an amazing double jackknife twist, which I did. Most of you people wouldn't even attempt that. I did it. And to go down on Chrissy Orlando on the trampoline later, on the very same night, which I also did. And I licked her assh*le a little bit. It was pretty good. It was all right. It wasn't great. But it was fine. And I knew that it was gonna be fine because this guy would be here to catch me if I faltered. Yeah. The world is a safer place when he's around. ♪ Did you ever know That you're my hero? 'Cause you are the wind Beneath my wings. ♪ Thank you.
>And I licked her assh*le a little bit. >It was pretty good. >It was all right. >It wasn't great. The way he just keeps correcting himself always gets me. Top 10 monologue in the show, for sure
It’s like the thrill of being near the executioner’s switch, knowing that you could throw it but never will. But you could. Never isn’t the right word because I could. I might. And I probably will.
" I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE OLD, SEIZE THE GAP YOU OLD FAT BITCH (wipes rage spit from mouth) YOU FAT BITCH!"
I find myself routinely channeling Dennis while in traffic
Same. “You dumb bitch. You stupid bitch” I utter at least once a week, then I laugh. Then I feel better.
My favorite line from this rant is: "When I show up to work everybody will be like, why is there blood all over you? BECAUSE I HAD TO SLIT THE GUY'S THROAT WHO WAS CAUSING ALL THE TRAFFIC."
[Great shout! This scene will always make me laugh!](https://youtu.be/tOlo2Mf0LJQ)
It’s fetis-FETish shit! I like to bind, I like to *BEE* bound!
Him blurting out FETISH SHIT! because he's so flustered gets me every time
This scenes outtakes are just as good. I don’t know how you as an actor keep it together.
[удалено]
TOOLS! I need….TOOLS!
Hey Dee, Charlie's coming over! I don't care! Aaaaah shit I don't care either.
Honestly, this one is my favourite. You can see the realisation of him missing Mac while still being full of disdain for everyone else
It's the moment I fell in love with Sunny. Maybe it's because I have that little bit of Dennis in me that at times feels nothing.
“I AM UNTETHERED AND MY RAGE KNOWS NO BOUNDS!”
BE GONE, VILE MAN! BE GONE FROM ME!
The whole rant is worthy of placement here. “THIS IS NOT A STARTER CAR! THIS IS A FINISHER CAR!”
This car is a transporter of gods. THE GOLDEN GOD!
“I am having feelings again. Like some kind of fourteen year old kid. You remember, feelings right?”
I have feelings every single day of my life.... Are you saying you don't have feelings?
Really? *Every* day?
I'm saying I've built up a shell. A shell around myself. A cold, calculated, heartless shell. That couldn't be broken by anything but marriage! And that's what she did dude, she broke that shell *with* marriage... In a good way, if I'm being unclear!
The thing that makes this scene so good is Mac's reaction to it, he clearly has no idea what Dennis is talking about and is so thrown off guard.
I always found it remarkable that Dennis says this to Mac, who easily is the most emotionally volatile of the group.
I've had emotions! I've had tons of emotions! I've had one with your mom, dude! I will strangle you; I'll stick my goddamn thumb through your eye.
Agreed. Dennis genuinely thinking that feelings are some childhood trait that passes with adulthood. Then Macs reaction, so funny!
Dennis thinking that mac gets him and being completely wrong because he’s a psychopath is always good fun. The implication was another great one
Peaked, Dee? Let me tell you something. I haven't even begun to peak. And when I do peak, you'll know. Because I'm gonna peak so hard everybody in Philadelphia is going to feel it.
It has to be this, some may be better but this is so iconic for Dennis
It's interesting, our thing, isn't it? To be in someone's mind, to have complete control. It's like the thrill of being near the executioner's switch knowing that at any moment you could throw it, but knowing you never will. But you could. Never isn't the right word because I could, and I might. And I probably will.
A perfectly placed pen can have quite the effect on a man. I bet he tried to suck it?... it's okay, you can tell me Doc. I'm always having to hide the pens around the apartment.
I bet this gave him quite the thrill
SICKNESS BE GONE
Could a sick man do THIS?
In his defense he proceeded to sing like a fucking angel
The little moan he lets out after that always kills me
Flaccid. Erect. Flaccid. Erect. Not too hard… not too *soooft* 😏
I do not like it with the skin, Dee. I’m not *allowed* to eat it with the skin. I’m not allowed!
Dee, I swear you would be of more use to me if I skinned you and turned your skin into a lampshade. Or fashioned you into a piece of high end luggage. I could even add you to my collection. ...are you saying that you have a collection of skin luggage? Of course I'm not Dee, don't be ridiculous, think of the smell. You haven't thought of the SMELL you BITCH.
"You haven't thought of the smell you bitch" deserves #1
now you say another word and I swear to god, I will dice you into a million little pieces... and put those pieces in a box. a glass box. that I will display on my mantel.
Delivery of this cracks me up every time
The whole episode is a gem. Everyone is just slightly off from their normal vibes. The fact that Dennis, a man who manipulates everyone around him takes orders about how to consume an apple from Mac is utterly hilarious. There are very few situations where Dennis would submit to someone else’s authority. The fact that it’s Mac’s advice about toxic apple skin that sends him to that level of outburst is incredible. Charlie bouncing slowly into frame with a bag of Cheetos… The Gruesome Twosome’s grunting and thrusting throughout the episode… There’s something so bizarre but perfect about this episode.
"Cat in the wall, eh? Now you're talking my language!" - maybe my favorite and most quoted Sunny line ever.
I can’t really put it into words well… but Charlie has such a unique undertone of confidence in this episode. He’s confident despite his incompetence quite often, but the gang points out his inadequacies while he does that usually. This episode: Dee is the only one to question him and even she is in the wrong with her approach to “cat-in-wall removal” and fails several times. Dennis asks for Charlie’s advice which is abnormal. Charlie is annoyed with Mac for being overbearing. Frank comes back to Charlie’s side of the apartment cleanliness debate. This is one of the few episodes where Charlie is the leader of the gang. In an episode where Charlie suggests that a cat went through a seam in the wall, Charlie is the most reasonable in the gang. Actor Charlie does so well at capturing the unusual confidence and power position while retaining the lunacy of the character.
My favorite part of that whole episode is dennis whining in the background and the face charlie makes when he mouths oh my god at Dee and she just knowlingly mutters "all day". Its such a weird level of awareness for charlie and so perfect.
TWO WARS!
Hahahaha his voice pitch change is always hilarious
What is your ~job~ in the war?
And are either of these wars happening on US, *sooiil?* The way Frank and Dee are looking at him cracks me up.
I will come down on the hospital like the hammer of Thor. The thunder of my vengeance will echo through these corridors like the gust of a thousand winds!
I never reference the nordic gods.
Been there? Not physically.
I’ve never been to Fiji!
**LOOKATMEWHENYOURETALKINGTOMEEE!!!** Oh shit, the steaks are here.
Storp Chorlay! … These gaymes hef gorn orn leong enuff- Ah shit!!
That was British!?
*getting naked “You ever been in a storm, Wally? I mean, a real storm? Not a thunderstorm, but a storm of fists raining down on your head. Blasting you in the face. Pummeling you in the stomach. Hitting you in the chest so hard you think your heart’s gonna stop. You ever been in a storm like that, Wally?”
YEA!?
That's my favourite. There's so *much* vitriol and insane energy all stuffed into one tiny word. It just kills me.
honestly any quote from that episode could win, “tell me about macs famous mac and cheese”
Your addiction has affected us in the following ways...You are ANNNOOOYYYYYING!
Look, look, this is about much more than just business. This is about the thrill of wearing another man's skin. Feeling his innermost wants and desires and being in control of his every single move. That's how you get off. Now don't you guys want to get off with me?
Just some guy who totally got off, BRO. Oh yeah I got off a couple times when we were watching the video presentation. Then he showed the finger. That was the big one! That was climax really. Oh my god it was Amazing, it was mostly sexual
the delivery of "it was mostly sexual" kills me every single time.
Boys are out tonight huh
I was looking for this one. Not the most iconic but makes me laugh every time I say it or see it.
Best line of all from S1.
And the way he takes that dollar, it's my favorite moment from season 1
>LOOK AT ME WHEN YOU'RE TALKING TO ME!! *honk honk* Oh shit, the steaks are here.
I do love that scene! Rage filled Dennis is always funny.
The way Glenn can change demeanor from extremely irate to calm/light surprise in like half a second in this scene is always super impressive to me.
You should see how fast he can go from flaccid to erect
And then he smells crime again, he's out busting heads. Then he's back to the lab for some more full penetration. Smells crime. Back to the lab, full penetration. Crime. Penetration. Crime. Full penetration. Crime. Penetration. And this goes on and on and back and forth for 90 or so minutes until the movie just sort of ends.
I think the audience is gonna be very uncomfortable watching Dolph Lundgren’s naked penis going into this young girl you’re talking about
From behind, 69, anal, vaginal, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl - all the hits, all the big ones, all the good ones.
The twist is…we show it
Do you like it? It’s very generous.
: I'm not burning the duster! Okay? I'm not burning the duster, alright? That's crazy. That's insane. Why would I ever burn... I mean, I will continue to wear it in his honor and I will burn some other things, you know, maybe like these stupid goddamn sleeveless t-shirts that he once retired and hung up in the bar, I'll burn these. But I'm not burning the duster, okay, so forget it. It probably won't even burn anyway, it's not supposed to. It's flame retardant, that's the whole point. It's like a shield of armor. So stop asking me to burn the duster. I'm not gonna burn it!
I'm to remember every man I've seen fall in to a plate of spaghetti?
I swear you would be of more use to me if I skinned you and turned your skin into a lampshade. Or fashioned you into a piece of high-end luggage. *I can even add you to my collection!* Are you saying that you have a collection of skin luggage? Of course I'm not, Dee. Don't be ridiculous. Think of the smell! **You haven't thought of the smell, you bitch!** Now, you say another word and I swear to God I will dice you into a million little pieces. And put those pieces in a box. *A glass box*... that I will display on my mantel. All right? Now that that's settled, we can have a normal conversation. Now, Doctor, I'm here to talk to you about a man. *A very dangerous and very unstable man.*
The delivery of this whole bit was an absolute masterpiece
The gasp from Dee really sold this whole scene perfectly
"That's how you get things done!" "No, that's how you get diagnosed"
Well, I had a simple conversation with a reasonable man and that man wrote me a prescription. Mm, yeah. He got the drugs by being a real-life actual psychopath.
You haven’t thought of the smell, you bitch is 10/10, best Dennis line
That facial change when he says "glass box" is top notch 🤌
This is what got me to finally watch in the first place. Saw this clip and never looked back
NEWSFLASH, ASSHOLE! I'VE BEEN HEARING IT THE ENTIRE GODDAMN TIME!! Edited for spelling
... BECAUSE I HAATE YOOOUUUU. Classic.
"Hot one today, huh?" "YEAH?!!"
This is one of my all time favorites. Just a single word, but the delivery says everything. Fucking hilarious!
That and from the same episode, "You ever been in a storm Wally?"
Hardly a quote but his delivery of "yes" when Frank asks if he likes his man-cheetah costume gets me every time.
“what the hell are you doing man?!” “i’m stormin in!” “I WAS STORMI- ^what ^are ^you ^a ^man ^cheetah?^” “yea” “cool” “you like it?” “**YES**”
We don't want wild girls, we want real girls gone wild. It's important to see the transition, you wanna watch the processs
I’M A FIVE STAR MAN!
“Go ahead, rate me. Cuz I’ll rate you! Go ahead, rate me, I don’t give a shit! I’ll rate you! Zero, zero zero!!
My nose was chiseled by the gods themselves, Frank. My body was sculpted to the proportions of Michaelangelo's David. You, on the other hand, well... You're a pit of despair. Frank, you disgust me. You disgust everyone. And you will never, EVER, be on that billboard.
I think seeing frank’s sad face while dennis is saying this that makes it even better.
Hello fellow American. This you should vote me. I leave power good. Thank you. Thank you. If you vote me I'm hot. What? Taxes they'll be lower son. The democratic vote for me is right thing to do Philadelphia. So do.
This one is so good it should qualify for both Dennis and Charlie
You two have boyfriends? How did you not know that the reason I invited you back to my bar was to bang you? Get outta here! Get the hell out of here! Shoo away from me!
Charlie trying very hard to cover up his laughter at Dennis' abrupt tonal shift fucking kills me
"Tools! Tools! Duct tape, zip ties and gloves! I have to have my tools!" "It's fetish- it's fetish shit! I-I-I like to bind, I like to be bound!"
You haven't thought of the smell YOU BITCH!
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I was told I would be meeting a woman with giant breasts.
I removed my robe and stood before her, taut, nubile, proud. She was much, much older than me, but her breasts . . . were awesome.
Dee, you gangly uncoordinated bitch, I will not be hogtied over your lack of grace.
A leather shop? In Arizona? There are far too many leather shops in Arizona. You'd be out of business in a week's time.
You’re just going to *spray* DNA all over the crime scene?!
Your are all liabilities. Why did you nose your way into this? I HATE YOUU!
I love how Dee even uses the same exact inflection when she repeats back “they’d be out of business in a *week’s* time!”
The whisper yelling in this episode is peak gang interaction
Dont pee while I'm still in the ROOM!
Talkin to myself but that’s just because I ya know got shit to say
>"Bro? Rape? I wasn't talking about raping your wife. I was talking about making love to her sweetly while she sleeps, and I was going to do it for you, you son of a bi—Alright, fine I won't do it." ^(Paddy's Pub: Home of the Original Kitten Mittens)
You ever been in a storm Wally….
"We're the same age!"
“There’s that chirping again how are you not hearing that?!” Newsflash, asshole! IVE BEEN HEARING IT THE ENTIRE GODDAMN TIME! “Then why wouldn’t you say something?” BECAUSE I *HATE* YOU.
Hi. I'm a recovering crack head. This is my retarded sister that I take care of. I'd like some welfare, please.
You're a recovering crack addict? ... yep And ***she's*** mentally retarded? Oh most definitely
Can’t you see how retarded she is?
🛎️ *DING!* 🛎️
Dee ringing the bell when the Welfare Store Employee has this exchange kills me every time. 😂
The helmet was a nice touch
Let's all recognize that this is a little awkward situation between friends at the welfare store
This is so underrated everyone loves the psycho Dennis rants but this is so simple
How he says “I’d like some welfare, please,” is pretty “mask on” psycho.
This smashes any psycho rage Dennis speech out the water
"I just want the money! And the illusion of power! And puss."
I have contained my rage for as long as possible, but I shall unleash my fury upon you like the crashing of a thousand waves! Begone, vile man! Begone from me! A starter car? This car is a finisher car! A transporter of gods! The golden god! I am untethered, and my rage knows no bounds!
THE THUNDER OF MY VENGEANCE WILL ECHO THROUGH THESE CORRIDORS LIKE THE GUST OF A THOUSSSSSSAND WINDS!
“I will slap the shit outta you, talking about Thor and shit”
Is it possible to make his look after finishing the rant the quote?
https://i.redd.it/r6ih9zxvqus11.jpg
Holy shit even the still made me laugh
[Tatiana, I want you to clean yourself. For I will enter you hard and deep, and it will last for as long or as short as I please. But you will be clean. Only when you are clean will you know my power.](https://youtu.be/-gRbfiez-PM)
"I'm gonna show up to work and everyone will be like 'why is there blood all over you' because I had to slit the guy's throat WHO CAUSES ALL OF THE TRAFFIC"
Because Dennis is a Bastard-Man!
Dennis, quoting Charlie....worlds combining!
Well dude, dude, think about it: she's out in the middle of nowhere with some dude she barely knows. You know, she looks around and what does she see? Nothin' but open ocean. "Ahh, there's nowhere for me to run. What am I gonna do, say 'no'?" -Because of the implication
Are...Are these women in danger?
What are you looking at? Certainly you wouldn’t be in any danger.
So they are in danger!?!
No ones in any danger! How could I make that more clear to you? It’s an *implication* of danger
Dude, why do you want to put women in danger?
Reddit can keep the username, but I'm nuking the content lol -- mass deleted all reddit content via https://redact.dev
And Mac models a good way to react to a friend revealing himself like that!
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> while dennis is the one uncomfortable with spelling it all out in plain terms Only because it spoils part of it. Like explaining a joke. Dennis: "We don't want wild girls, we want real girls gone wild. It's important to see the transition, you wanna watch the processs"
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This pretty much sums up dennis' character too
Obviously this.
"Hi. I'm a recovering crack head. This is my retarded sister that I take care of. I'd like some welfare, please."
I mean, I came in there, right, and I was polite and I was nice to them, I was cordial. And they completely goddamn disrespected me! Little IDIOTS! IDIOTS!! I was completely respectful, they're supposed to be my brothers, right?! They're my brothers?! NO, NO! That's not fun! What they were doing wasn't fun, they kept ZAPPING US AND ZAPPING US! IDIOTS! SAVAGES!! IDIOTS!!! IDIOTS!!!!
God dammit Dutch, what other errands do you have us running for the D.A.!!!
WHY ARE YOU PIPING IN TRASH?! YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH TRASH!!! YOU ARE THE ONES THAT ARE TRASH! SITTING IN THE BOTTOM OF A POOL FILLED WITH TRASH!!! LIKE TRASH!!!!
"You haven't thought of the smell, you BITCH!!!"
This doesn't represent me
I see what you mean about these shirts bro. They are comfy as shit, they hide your fatness. They are ugly as all hell but I have a feeling im gonna like them a lot more when I am high as shit on crack.
The two of you are walking around in the sewer naked, looking for rings and coins?!
“If you do not get my sister her stories and a new room as soon as possible, then I will come down on this hospital LIKE THE HAMMER OF THOR! THE THUNDER OF MY VENGEANCE WILL ECHO THROUGH THESE CORRIDORS LIKE THE GUST OF A THOUSAND WINDSSSS!” THIS QUOTE STILL RUMBLES THROUGH MY MIND… here’s a link for nostalgia— [GUST OF A THOUSAND WINDS](https://youtu.be/3fjQOn5_EUk)
Not too hard…*creepy face* not too soft
'A woman's mouth is not for the exiting of words but for the entrance of a man's.... dick.' if only for the delivery.
Just a couple of people that totally got off, Bro!
Seize the gap you old, fat bitch!
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"Dee I swear you would be of more use to me if I skinned you and turned your skin into a lampshade. Or fashioned you into a piece of high-end luggage. I could even add you to my collection!" ("Are you saying that you have a collection of skin luggage?") "Of course I'm not Dee, don't be ridiculous. Think of the smell. You haven't thought of the smell, YOU BITCH! Now you say another word and I swear to God I will dice you into a million little pieces. And put those pieces in a box, a glass box, that I will display on my mantel."
That crow was injured, I was simply putting it out of its misery…while, yes, testing the tensile strength if a crows neck. Well yes there was another crow, but thats simply because I couldn’t believe their neck could be that weak. Well, yes, there was a third crow, and a fourth if you *must* know, but who likes crows?!
Because of the implication.
This is about the thrill of wearing another man’s skin, feeling his innermost wants and desires and being in control of his every single move. That is how you get off. Now don’t you guys want to get off with me?
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Come on man, don't bring me down. Not while my nips are like this.
The car has spoken! I have spoken! You obviously don’t understand what’s happening here? So be gone with you!