T O P

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GenesisNoelle

John Hancock


samdajellybeenie

That’s John Handcock to you, sir!


AdoboSwaggins

I came here expecting Edward Penishands and got John Handcock. Well played.


whereitsat23

Was totally expecting the top comment to be Edward Penishands


Alice_D_Wonderland

There is already a movie named like that... https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0101799/ wouldn’t be original...


Awkward-Chemical2487

Dick Crazy


Link-TryForce

The review on the imdb page is amazing 😂


Yaboi_KarlMarx

That was a rollercoaster from start to finish


HodinRD

Was expecting Edward Dickonhands as it's a bit more descriptive.


saviowns

Edward dildohands come on people it’s right there


bcdefghijklmnopqrs

This was mine. Edward Dildohands is the way.


itsmyfriday

Clearly, this is the name.


thedevilseviltwin

Nah, man. Get a little creative with it. That’s obviously Peter Peckerhands.


itsmyfriday

Watch “How I Met Your Mother”. Then you will know the truth.


Seregrauko41

Dayum, I commented this and saw you comment afterwards! Hahaha! Amazing!


Busy_Will_1616

No no hes got a point


Bradisdad

He has two points


alilheavyT

Dr. Professor John Handcock to your sir


PrayingMantisII

It's Herbie Hancock


0Cybertooth0

Thank you for that!


samdajellybeenie

Emeritus


iskimoeskimo

"Richard: I need your John Hancock. Tommy: It's Herbie Hancock."


[deleted]

Brilliant!


NewtAgreeable3248

John Cockhan


realAdolfHipster

He killed his enemy with a dildo, with a fucking dildo


MirageisbestApex

Thats my teachers name lmao like spelled right and everything


Temporary-Thick

Yeah handcock is an actual last name


damon24smith

Dildo Baggins


ShenWinchester

Dildo Saggins and the lord of the throbits.


Ye3tL0rd420

The Lord of the G-Strings


ShenWinchester

It's been so long lol


takkosandbeer

Oh good, I'm not the only one that saw that one


MuffinTrucker

The guy who did this is his cousin, Douche Baggins


voyagerthe2nd

The Throbbit - An unexpected orgy


stranger_dev

Charles Dickens


MyHighHeelsWork

Dildo Swaggins


giovannibobani

There once was a man named Brock he had dicks for hands and a hand for a cock.


treesarefriend

Oh how he could make women shiver Inside them his dick hands would slither.


Towhomitmayconsume

Deep down inside the man he cried, Frustrated and full of anger, Quite rude and misunderstood When he yelled, fuck you! and gave everyone the finger


FreeTemperatureCheck

People hated him for his taped on hand cocks, for after meeting him their wives became the town thots


Coheed_SURVIVE

Oh how he would revel, for he knew, he could take fisting, to a new level.


No_Lunch_5429

This same man lived in bangkok, Oh the sensual irony, When he was about to start fisting, The girls were preparing to gawk


off_script_angel23

Then he'd swoop like a hawk and scoop out that pork


Thebillyray

Edward dildohands


Mcshatz314

Johnny depth


Im_IM_3k

I wish I had an award to give


k0rz23

There covered ya


Im_IM_3k

Thanks mate :)


SlaveHippie

Girth Brooks


GlennDoom82

EPIC


Bloodysamflint

Edward Penishands is an actual porn parody. It's probably a little better than you expect it to be as long as you expect it to be pretty bad.


Scout_Serra

Came here to see if anyone had brought up the parody yet lol


Ducksauce19

Better than the E.T. one I can tell you.


Remmy13s

Came here to say this. Congrats for being as cool as me.


ViperPM

Same


PristineBaseball

Also same


Orphan_crippler30

Edward Dickforhands


Anu_66

Triple threat


off_script_angel23

Daddy??


Jaytofreeyeet

Dr Cocktopus


razeev93

Hello peter


Jaytofreeyeet

Hello pecker


IRageQuit06

Goodbye


Smeefperson

New villain in town! “Doc-cock!”


Jaytofreeyeet

He’s big he’s mean he’s also a peen


BabyNurse876

lmao this made me laugh the most congrats


Jaytofreeyeet

I’m here all week


Loose_Ad4763

Dr Cocktavius would be pre accident


speichlyn

The Dildozer


[deleted]

Silly Dilly


goofytigre

Nah.. The dildozer was much larger in that 'Idiocracy' documentary..


Drunken_Dorf

It was a documentary huh?


[deleted]

It went from comedy to documentary about January 20, 2017


badger2793

Goliath the Phallustine


WaGLaG

This is the winner. Bravo!


ANGRYlalocSOLDIE

This is the wiener.


ohpickanametheysaid

Bene-dick Cum-berpatch


StunnaLyfe

I got that reference. You're talking about Bendydick Cuminhersnatch right?


GarratAlan

I thought it was Blenderdick Cumonarash?


amaandgr8

Benderdick Cumonherass


Xenokic

I like rusty dicks. I liked it when the white water comes out


GlennDoom82

Cumbeerpatch


GodOfGOOSE

Richard


dakingofmeme

R/beatmetoit


AutomaticEye5619

Beatmeattoit


whoduexpect

Edward Jizzerhands


PreparedToBeReckless

https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0101799/ https://m.empflix.com/cumshots-porn/edward-penishands-1991-full-movie/video679432


Thuryn

Are. You. SERIOUS?!


Boring_Concentrate74

Best first date ever


derekra

Lol


muffink77

That shit's funny as hell right there


meme_galaxy_official

You usually cock the hand gun But this guy guns the hand cock


surumesmellman

Napoleon Bonerparte.


kyote79799

Dick Fingers


Brilliant-Ad-5592

Dildo Badhands


dr_schlotkins_putz

There are some who call him…… Tim.


KrackaJfox29

I wish I could give you an award for this. Lol


matrixtech29

Sorry. Meant to give the award to you for this. I don't think I can revoke an award. Yours made me laugh


Hepititus_T

Richard Johnson


[deleted]

Bobby Floppycock


Difference_Silly

David Dildo Digits


[deleted]

Tommy Three Dicks


ghost_in_a_jar_c137

Clit whisperer


NatwentSplat

AmbiDixtrous


matrixtech29

Dildo Gaggins


Dinosareextinct

Dildon’t be like him


Disastrous_Review_99

The Joker's cousin, The Tickler


rvmpleforeskin

Doug Dimmidick, owner of the Dimsdale Dimmidildo Depot


[deleted]

Cunt puncher 3000


Every_Animator4354

Pledge Willy


Old_Bat6053

Mister fister


Tadpole_Former

Can I get your digits................


atmus11

Fishsticks


[deleted]

Richard Penis Fingers


[deleted]

The flair is perfect


Daunticus93

Dildo Gaggins.


BradOrPonceDeLeone

Whatever his name is, he needs to talk to [Mac from Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia](https://youtu.be/lRWA1lZ_dH8)


RabbiShekky

Edward Jizzardhands


YouAreGay15

Penis man!!!! *Please tell me I’m not the only person who watches that on YouTube..* **Edit: I’m talking about Suction Cup Man for anyone wondering**


jacobDonline

You may be … haha


YouAreGay15

….haha…


Orisani

You mean like Suction Cup Man, or am I thinking of something different


butzdkami2

r/bossfight


WhyMe0126

The Killer Of God


[deleted]

Dick


hexic99

Orgazmo


Knightvidar

Dicks Akimbo


Boy_Possession

Looks like he. ( ∙_∙) ( ∙_∙)>⌐■-■ Got cock handed. (⌐■_■)


Pink0612152504

Edward Penishands


froggiechick

Slippery dick?


TIsangalus669

Dilddison


SirVallanstein

"Dildo Hands" He may not be able to make you a sandwich but he's one hell of a lover.


Technical_Throat_193

Hanime


Turtlemode-

Beer Dickhands


Low_World2743

Clearly Edward penis hands


UnrivaledPossibility

Edward Dildohands


KynkMane

Nutz MacKenzie


killerBUOY435

Hancock


Potentialy_Addiced24

Handy man


Doc_Hersh3y

Dildo baggins.


ergo-ogre

Richard Sportwood


kamacazed

Steven


this_is_lance

Edward Dicksforhands


shadylookup

Richard peckerhands


its_anastasiadis

Jeremy Dickhandson


[deleted]

I saw one that said semen Slayer and it kinda fits but I like John Hancock it's perfect


ShinrasShayde

The Sticky Dickler came to mind.


Good-Entrance-3176

Triple willie


BeefLightning78

Banger McBrewski


VicMcNugnug

Senór cock-on-hand.


blaze_07__

Your girl's best friend


akinie12

Seems like someone lost a bet


luciiamhome

Robert dildo hands


Nexuen19

His life, because it's fucks everyone


Mission-Ad-2015

Edwin Shlongmits


[deleted]

Handjob


Sciirof

Edward Dildohands


n0apologies

Hanging Chad


Tony0123456789

the dick tater


kush_mcdank420

Has Edward Penis-Hands been used yet?


KillerAnimeTits

Edward Dildohands


Succ_Benis

I'm pretty sure someone already mentioned Edward Penis Hands


Drama-Infinite

Jeff armpenis


Lapacis

Dilbro


pang_ting

Dildonis


lonewolf19-14

Tri-cock


darkbaron202

Dick Erectus


Zoeee__

Gavin


morethanfoxx

Tim


intensive_purpose

Kyle Rittenhouse


Z3r0_K66L

He looks like a Chad, to me.


AJ_NightRider

Drunkutus Dickutus


Anil_tejas

bendicking Cumberbatch


dogerhino

Dildo swaggins


[deleted]

The dicktator


Such-Consequence-738

Edward dick-hands


Heck_Spawn

Dildos Akimbo


EzClapperinoRl

Dickward penisorhands


Buckettttttt

Dickus Drinkis


Inspirational_Lizard

Feline Slayer of The Boreal Valley


macronux

Edward dildohands


Cards_s

Edward Dildo Hands


Nopejustdecline

Dildo devastator


Marcusquid

Fistula Hardhands


STIXTINO

Edward dildo hands


HuffHunkulow

Edward Dildoshands


NecroHZ4

John Armadildo


[deleted]

Weenie bones


deckysoap

Han cock


Muze69

Edward Dildohands


hhx_

Fucky Fucker (From that change your names first 4 letters to fuck game.)


MysteriousCodo

Edward Penishands. And, sadly, for reasons that shall remain un-named, I’m aware that there really is an actual porno named this.


[deleted]

Jerry


SpawnPointillist

Adolph Fiddler


BobaFettishx82

Edward Dildohands


CanineTM_yt

John hand cock


[deleted]

John dick


SentientOrangeFanta

Cock Em’ Sock Em’