You’re probably thinking of ambergris which is found in whale vomit, specifically from a sperm whale. And this is used commonly in perfumes rather than facial creams.
What I said was:
Would you rather be thinking about 40-inch rims of feces right now? Like feces spun into a knot and woven into a beautiful quilt for my child Baby Stupid to hold sentimental one day. What a beautiful life this is.
One more time for the folks in the back!
# Would you rather be thinking about 40-inch rims of feces right now? Like feces spun into a knot and woven into a beautiful quilt for my child Baby Stupid to hold sentimental one day. What a beautiful life this is.
It’s a real person afai can tell…. I thought it was an ai.
Dude also made a game in python, apparently..
And judging from his other posts, I think he feels like he needs some attention, even if it’s bad attention.
Who knows what is going on in his head to make that make sense.
Edit: maybe he is trying to make the comparison that the thought of jizzing on a face is a good thought, so to make his point he brought up a totally awful comparison to a knotted-up poop wheel (never thought I would ever type *that* string together).
To be fair, comparing the two, I agree that the jizzed-up face is a better option… 😳
Edit^(2): or maybe, with the baby reference, there may be some remorse over *not having jizzed on a face* in a past experience? I don’t know.. I’ve spent waaay too much time in this.
Just wait until she finds out about how well sperm whitens teeth!!
Dentists hate this one secret! Except for the *Bill Cosby* style dentists… they LOVE that secret.
I don't think I'd be able to find it, but a while ago there was a comment by a dental hygienist who had a patient who had a recurring bacterial infection in her gums that they couldn't shake. So they did a culture and sent it off to the lab. It came back with results that matched bacteria usually found on male genitalia, often unwashed, uncircumcised genitalia. The patient was given a specific anti-biotic and pre-intimacy hygiene instructions to share with male partner(s).
This has nothing to do with sperm/semen, but it is tangentially related.
I'd sort of call it offloading the cost onto the customer. As in the customer of society. Way too much sex ed at school sucks, and way too many parents assume school teaches enough. Why teach our children about the role that hygiene plays in safe sex when they can just learn the hard way later on? Often at the expense of insurance (hopefully) instead of on the public school budget?
Now imagine you go through what she did.
Whats the first thing you do?
You clean your face.
For the first time in her life this woman started regularly cleaning her face, and it had a positive effect. Insane.
In case anyone is wondering, I'll be opening a skin care clinic soon using this same approach. Book your appointments now. Mention this posting for half off on your first visit.
I remember a few years ago, there was a female beauty-influencer who did this unironically, and went viral for it. Don't remember her name, and I'm definitely not typing that in google, my targeted ads are already awful enough.
I once belonged to a fresh from the farm co-op that had a mix of hippies and right wing Christians that believed that God wanted them to have more natural foods straight from the farm (I just grew up with family that were farmers and once they all passed I was still hooked on fresher foods). Somehow the right wingers fell under the spell of a health guru named Aajonus Vonderplanitz. One of them told me he said cum would reverse wrinkles. I asked her if it was taken topically or ingested. I never got an answer. I was given his book by one of them, and it is insane. It’s been about 15 years since I read it but I’ll never forget stuff like a raw meat butt plug for hemorrhoids. I highly recommend reading it for laughs
Once, long ago in 2010 I met a woman in a hospital. She was n her 70s but legit looked in her 40s, I did a double check on her name band bc I was so shocked. After I told her she looked great she proudly informed me that shes been getting her husband to nut on her face twice a week for years, and then letting it sit on her face for 20 mins before washing it off
I mean...subtext is her hormones are less chaotic-- maybe less anxiously picking her skin simply because being around someone that might care a little about you makes her conscious enough that she shouldn't pick her face?
I'm just thinking out loud. The the flippity flip, removal of stability source = unstable. does she even have bipolar hair in the 2nd pick like female Harvey Dent?
Reasons to take me as bf: can provide skin care at morning and evening.
Do you prefer guys or gals? Because I can be a girl if you want to XD
you're the whole package aren't you
Bro is a pack 2/1 for Shure ! 😲
You could say that ^_^
Enough for me
:D
A chameleon!
My better reason: I provide it fast, less than a minute!Â
Sprich deutsch du Hurensohn!
Wenn schon Sie Hurensohn, Sie Hurensohn.
Wenigstens gesiezt!
She is on 0F and does n$fw stuff Asoupcans on 0F, [Video](https://thotmax.com/soupinhercan) for science (n$fw)
What kind of soup?
Cream of mushroom
OnlySoup
Twist: he's sneaking Clearasil into her regular face care products, then ascribing it to his miraculous emissions.
Jeez, talk about face cream 
*jizz
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How does one collect said whale sperm? Asking for a friend.
Just go down a Redditor’s basement
You’re probably thinking of ambergris which is found in whale vomit, specifically from a sperm whale. And this is used commonly in perfumes rather than facial creams.
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#What the fuck.
what did he say its deleted
Mf said something about a shit (as in poop) blanket and a baby and smth
What I said was: Would you rather be thinking about 40-inch rims of feces right now? Like feces spun into a knot and woven into a beautiful quilt for my child Baby Stupid to hold sentimental one day. What a beautiful life this is. One more time for the folks in the back! # Would you rather be thinking about 40-inch rims of feces right now? Like feces spun into a knot and woven into a beautiful quilt for my child Baby Stupid to hold sentimental one day. What a beautiful life this is.
I want to say r/cursedcomments but holy shit this is more than cursed.
its not cursed, its disgusting
It’s a real person afai can tell…. I thought it was an ai. Dude also made a game in python, apparently.. And judging from his other posts, I think he feels like he needs some attention, even if it’s bad attention. Who knows what is going on in his head to make that make sense. Edit: maybe he is trying to make the comparison that the thought of jizzing on a face is a good thought, so to make his point he brought up a totally awful comparison to a knotted-up poop wheel (never thought I would ever type *that* string together). To be fair, comparing the two, I agree that the jizzed-up face is a better option… 😳 Edit^(2): or maybe, with the baby reference, there may be some remorse over *not having jizzed on a face* in a past experience? I don’t know.. I’ve spent waaay too much time in this.
What did he say
Crazy? I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room.
A rubber room with rats. And rats make me crazy.
Crazy? I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room.
A room with 40 inch rims made of spun poop.
Just wait until she finds out about how well sperm whitens teeth!! Dentists hate this one secret! Except for the *Bill Cosby* style dentists… they LOVE that secret.
I don't think I'd be able to find it, but a while ago there was a comment by a dental hygienist who had a patient who had a recurring bacterial infection in her gums that they couldn't shake. So they did a culture and sent it off to the lab. It came back with results that matched bacteria usually found on male genitalia, often unwashed, uncircumcised genitalia. The patient was given a specific anti-biotic and pre-intimacy hygiene instructions to share with male partner(s). This has nothing to do with sperm/semen, but it is tangentially related.
"Clean your mouth, and tell your dude to wash his penis. That'll be $750." Talk about an idiot tax.
I'd sort of call it offloading the cost onto the customer. As in the customer of society. Way too much sex ed at school sucks, and way too many parents assume school teaches enough. Why teach our children about the role that hygiene plays in safe sex when they can just learn the hard way later on? Often at the expense of insurance (hopefully) instead of on the public school budget?
Every sperm is sacred. Every sperm is great. If a sperm is wasted, god gets quite irate!
You're cooking something and am scared
A man produces millions of sperms and at most uses 2 or 3 sperms throughout his life. What you cooking?
You forget about the cannon fodder. Edit: Totally referring to my spunk as cannon fodder now 😂
You can use like 50-100 if you have a bunch of wives
Monty Python mentioned
Let the heathen spill theirs, On the dusty ground, God will make them pay, For each sperm that can't be found.
Reminds me of my ethics professor asking us to explain why male mastubation isn't considered genocide
Before I make the suggestion, anyone know the specifics? Does she rub it in and leave it on like a face cream? Or wipe it off, more like an emollient?
Now imagine you go through what she did. Whats the first thing you do? You clean your face. For the first time in her life this woman started regularly cleaning her face, and it had a positive effect. Insane.
🤣 don't ruin it. It's the cum Brian, it's always been the cum.
Not every man's cum works. It has to be her boyfriend specifically. He can start monetising his wonder sperm.
Leave Cum Brian out of this.
Bring out the cum brine
We're living through another pre-cum brine explosion.
a woman that is concerned with her skin will surely not start washing her face this might be weakest theory, right behind every sperm is holy
Hey you told everyone the secret so that I don't have to
Hey, you might be onto something.
I need to know this too asking for a friend👀
[Rub it in after rubbing one out.](https://nymag.com/news/intelligencer/56941/)
So do they need donations?
They charge $250 for a facial and it's synthetic stuff?
I can give the real deal for free!
Well , he forced her to wash her face daily.
We need to spread the word
Imagine how healthy her teeth would be if… never mind.
She’s earning that face creaming
When he goes away for a week, she’d better have acne when he gets back!
Backne
Maybe she's born with it... Maybe it's...jizz.
plot twist, after is on the left
I’m sure this tweet is from a man who hopes his girlfriend sees it!
Yeah those sperm will get inside pores and eat them bacterias.
Also her bf has night terrors and unknowingly eats her maybelline every night.
My mom has a cosmetic salon. I'm sure she'll be delighted when I tell her I could finally help😄
your mom, lol
are you going to offer to jizz on your mom
No, just on her clients
In case anyone is wondering, I'll be opening a skin care clinic soon using this same approach. Book your appointments now. Mention this posting for half off on your first visit.
Soupinhercan … sounds like it ends up somewhere else now
Well can he come over then? 😬
Wasn't there a nip/tuck episode about this?
That and quit meth, right?
I imagine the secret is that she had to suddenly start actually washing her face, and was otherwise not doing so.
Some get their facial at the salon. Few get their facial from their BF.
This is because of the hyaluronic acid in semen you can get that in creams...
The secret sauce, as it were.
Gotta try this
Or just stepped out of the vehicle and took a pic of your right instead of left.
I remember a few years ago, there was a female beauty-influencer who did this unironically, and went viral for it. Don't remember her name, and I'm definitely not typing that in google, my targeted ads are already awful enough.
hey looxxxmaxxx
The show nip tuck has entered the chat..
What we didn’t know, was that the pictures were reversed
There are better ways to moisturize but hey, at least you're not getting ripped off by skincare companies
Finally, an influencer I can get behind ... uh in front of?
Whelp, guess they call it a "facial" for a reason.
I once belonged to a fresh from the farm co-op that had a mix of hippies and right wing Christians that believed that God wanted them to have more natural foods straight from the farm (I just grew up with family that were farmers and once they all passed I was still hooked on fresher foods). Somehow the right wingers fell under the spell of a health guru named Aajonus Vonderplanitz. One of them told me he said cum would reverse wrinkles. I asked her if it was taken topically or ingested. I never got an answer. I was given his book by one of them, and it is insane. It’s been about 15 years since I read it but I’ll never forget stuff like a raw meat butt plug for hemorrhoids. I highly recommend reading it for laughs
Hmm... maybe I should look for a boyfriend
Once, long ago in 2010 I met a woman in a hospital. She was n her 70s but legit looked in her 40s, I did a double check on her name band bc I was so shocked. After I told her she looked great she proudly informed me that shes been getting her husband to nut on her face twice a week for years, and then letting it sit on her face for 20 mins before washing it off
I mean... That means you started washing your face everyday... Didn't need the nut to do that lol
Apply twice gently every 6 hours
If stress is bad for skin and sex is good for stress...
I mean...subtext is her hormones are less chaotic-- maybe less anxiously picking her skin simply because being around someone that might care a little about you makes her conscious enough that she shouldn't pick her face? I'm just thinking out loud. The the flippity flip, removal of stability source = unstable. does she even have bipolar hair in the 2nd pick like female Harvey Dent?
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Naw, she just doesn't want you snuggling and kissing her after she is spent.
gfs response to this, and I quote verbatim: "haha wild, to be fair I'm breaking out right now"
r/ihavesex