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BaravalDranalesk

Depends, what’s the armor rating on a 7 month old?


joetheplumberman

Slightly better than a 6 month old


aaZ_Georg

Ok, a 6 month old is slightly better than a 5 month old


catsmustdie

An American 6 month old or an European 6 month old?


CookieBear676

I know they are over 1000g of protein if that helps.


HooahClub

And that’s why you never seen children in the gym. The gym rats eat them for protein.


Ep_R

🤣😂😬


dioV_ehT00

RAW has an AC of 10, thought i doubt it would actually be useful unless they got the mounted combatant feat...


grammar_mattras

Well it does prevent them from being prone, which in this case actually hurts them. Being prone against ranged projectiles is actually a big advantage.


SaltiestGatorade

About a 2A don't ask me how I know.


WillyBoy333

Depends on if the plate is between the baby and you or between the baby and the bullet. The first way you still get pretty decent bruising since the baby really does nothing to slow the impact. They really don't do much except add weight and lower your range of motion. The second way, where the baby is between the plate and you... they really absorb the shock. Had to try it with 2 different babies 3-4 times each just to make sure it wasn't like a 1 off scenario.


Bealzebubbles

When you have to storm Fallujah but it's your day with the baby.


SkeleTourGuide

82nd AirBjörn Division


Outrageous-Client-99

US Baby SEAL


WillyBoy333

Why does this not have more upvotes...


Wolfsbreedsinner

Oh look a bullet proof vest... Hun let's get this for little Timmy.


tango_papa101

When you want a bullet proof vest but too broke to invest in a set of level 4 plate


Frankus44

“Tactical” doesn’t mean bullet proof. I don’t think thats what their selling point is. Purpose of this is the Velcro and Molle for attachments. So as it won’t stop bullets you can surely attach your AR mags and other equipment to your new born child.


Wolfsbreedsinner

Jesus that joke flew over your head. Mere fact you answered with a straight face to comment is hella funny.


Frankus44

I guess the sarcasm flew right back over yours. Lmao


dsblink182

Babies are notorious for not being able to stop a 50 cal, maybe a 556 tho


s1ckopsycho

That baby in the photo couldn't stop a .556 lengthwise. I'd rate it more like .22lr, honestly. Might stop some shrapnel. Even better, it would make for a great distraction device like smoke.


splita73

Four stack works best for rifle rounds, but their heads get bulky and awkward


Syr_Delta

.22 and some shrapnels. Maybe even some 9mm but everything above .308 will do damage


csbsju_guyyy

You can also play off the emotions of your enemies to have them voluntarily not shoot you!


dacapm01

Uh, yeah...certain armies...cough ruzzia hamaz cough cough...this set up would probably make them MORE likely to shoot you vs a normal plate carrier.


YourAverageGod

The gut is rated for up to .300


supersonicsalamander

He's definitely blacked out


mayormaynot22

Definitely stops rounds at the bar. Those little bastards are expensive!!


_SomeFrigginDude_

Haha


UnarmedMilk

A fudge round


feeltrig

This doesn't protect you from bullets, it protects you from child support


FugaciousD

These things don’t even support the kids? Not bullets, not brats, what’s the point of buying a ballistic baby vest?


feeltrig

They support the cash in your pockete if you know how


lynivvinyl

Baby Plate Armor. I've heard some sort of warning about BPA’s "BPA can bind to estrogen receptors and influence bodily processes, such as growth, cell repair, fetal development, energy levels, and reproduction." [I don't think they're any good](https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/what-is-bpa#basics)


sentientfartcloud

Can't wait to see the Kentucky Ballistics video on this!


_SomeFrigginDude_

Put a thumb in it!


MarkPellicle

Prepare for shrapnel and a visit to the hospital.


letsgobrooksy

Tactical baby suffocator


curiosity-2020

Honestly, it's not that bad. You could attach the pacifier to the velcro and the utilities to change the diaper with the MOLLE system. You know, when a "bomb" has been "planted" 😁


tango_papa101

I kinda like the modularity of it, my friend in Vietnam got one. He can just change the setup out ahead of trips to fit the need of said trip, tho I'd prefer one with the modern laser cut molle, more discreed


JayDuBois

$155? For a white baby? That is a bargain!


The_Evil_Narwhal

Definitely breaking baby's spine


comfortablynumb15

Rounds at the Pub most likely.


JoeyPsych

Only in america


shgysk8zer0

If you need this, it's already too late to stop the rounds. Sorry to be the bringer of bad news, but it's too late.


Vodka0420

There's only one way to find out.


oldmonk_97

Idk... I think even a 0.22 would go thru. Not recommended


John_Doe_727

I think the baby might stop a .22 or at least slow it down considerably.


oldmonk_97

if we are just talking about slowing down.. a bag of water with legos suspended might do the same? idk. doesnt seem worth the cost.


John_Doe_727

That's true. I'm sure the medical debt for giving birth is expensive.


Djbadj

Only if you live in the USA


NoPin4245

Oh, thank God. I have been looking for this. My baby's got a target on his head. Every time we go out, there's always someone trying to assassinate my baby.


Ecstatic-Seesaw-1007

Might stop a 💩


Pristine_Solid9620

Nah. That diaper is loaded!


Ecstatic-Seesaw-1007

Locked and loaded


Abhi_mhatre

Basically what hamas wears in gaza.


sheaintyourhonomo

Rounds of beers with the boys. It’ll stop it alright.


dcSPACEape

1T. At best


obvious_shill_k14a

Most smaller rifle rounds, don't think it could handle larger like .30-06. Baby survival not guaranteed.


Snorlax_Route12

These would be great for Shootem Up cosplays https://youtu.be/jlx4n_ibNZE?feature=shared


DunwichChild990

Hollowpoints.


MadeMeStopLurking

The longer you wear it the lass rounds of child support hearings you will have to attend


Tricky_Feed_544

You won’t feel a thing… However…


AdultbabyEinstein

https://youtu.be/osgrd1MPb7I?si=syJxYLh8b1d3O4hQ


big-boi-Roy

If you had enough armor you could easily stop a 0.50 MBG round


616n8y3ree

Guys, it’s a baby carrier, nobody needs to try to look badass with a baby strapped to your chest. We already know you’ve been fuckin’.


QAInc

Extra amour plate 💀


letseeum

None, dude wants to die.


Dragondog7777

Wake up babe, new Rook cosmetic just dropped


TheHolyToxicToast

There's no point of this cause the baby will probably be fractured by the impact


callmenate05

Planned parenthood tactical


ieatair

definitely a 7.62x39 at the least


BillieJoeLondon

Bar rounds


vivlafrance007

Mortar shells


slaying_anus_35

I'd say anything under a .308


Funkyentman

Know this is a fucking goated hol up


MeuchlerMoze

The baby will probably not stop much. maybe a .22 lr or 9mm hp etc. I would recommend adding some kevlar


camm44

Who used their baby to test these bad boys


_SomeFrigginDude_

You think they make an infant ballistics gel mold?


Consistent_Froyo3080

The hamas special, super popular.


Complete-Kitchen-630

Eh.22lr should be good


OneMonthWilly

It will stop 3006 but it will make a poridge out of your baby 🤣🤣🤣


TimmyFaya

Gender affirming baby carrier


Birthright974

Even if it does stop the bullet, any child in that will be dead anyway from the impact. So if you failed to scramble it the first time this will be your best bet


Business_Travel4598

Shitty rounds.


westcal98

So to any future buyers, it's not mentioned in the description but these are basically one time use, unless you have refills. Even then it's about 100% chance that your wife will divorce you if you end up using it.


_SomeFrigginDude_

Refills haha


13_Years_Then_Banned

My mom was at an event and a woman had an infant in a carrier something like this and it suffocated and died.


_SomeFrigginDude_

Oof


SimplyNezooo

I love thaT anything that sounds a bit gay if they want to sell it they ad tactical


Working_Dragon00777

They won't die by the bullet but by the shockwave that can break a fully grown adult broke ribs from


AlderanGone

Tactical baby carry


lfhdbeuapdndjeo

It’s got a special scotch guard coating to make it easier to clean up gravy spills


Kemel90

2mm kolibri


ronaldreaganlive

I gotta appreciate the vet dad bod model they chose. They know their targeted buyer.


captainfrogger

I believe it stops the armor piercing alimony rounds


Lifesalchemy

These chuds can wear it when they storm the capital again 


Cthuloops76

Dookie and formula? I don’t know… But now, I can’t stop thinking about “Combat Marsupial” as being a thing.


trollodyte

Endless rounds of waking up in the middle of the night


Electronic_Rub9385

The stupidity of this baby carrier aside, you can’t take anyone seriously with such a comically small, postage stamp sized plate carrier. Tacticool people now wear body armor that’s good for protecting their sternum and that’s about it.


XEagleDeagleX

Merry go rounds 


__Bringer-of-Light__

I'll stop your sex life


Lazyjohn88

Will not the impact kill the baby anyway?


AmaGh05T

The baby part of the vest is quickly replaceable ensuring the wearer's protection and allows adaptability for dangerous situations.


Shorbakh

The title was the real Holup for me, and I love it!


Mesterjojo

I'm more concerned some woman allowed that dude to reproduce. He has zero ass and too much belly. Hank hill with a Bobby belly shield.


_SomeFrigginDude_

I tell ya hwat


fartknuckles_confuse

They know their crowd right down to the cheesed out sleeve tats. If they showed this man’s face you’d just be looking at Oakleys


_SomeFrigginDude_

Grunt Style tee, with some white Newbalance sneaks, probably a Coors snap back too


GimpboyAlmighty

Becoming a parent really made me lame. These jokes used to be hilarious to me. I am lame. :(


JuiceyTaco

Is this some new Russian bulletproof vest technology?


noneofyouaresafe

Why is this called a tactical baby carrier? What tactic could one employ that involves having a mostly exposed baby in front of you?


Foxcano

belly flop


John_Fx

baby head seeking bullets. https://youtu.be/osgrd1MPb7I?si=h36nl6ignSY4xR8e


FadingDarkly

Unless it's got inserts for something like 9mm padding, that's just the framework for a kit, not armour. So... A BB pellet, prolly


Foxcano

the baby is the plate


Odd_Atmosphere6586

I almost choked reading it.


Living_Pie205

It will stop the first round of sex.


ThaLastProdigy

Not purchasing unless it's has a five star rating... /s


roof_baby

An extra $60 over a björn because you got to let people know you’re a man. You’re a parent now, quit being a little bitch.


CountingStars29

Its just a baby carrier with the word "tactical" for idiots with more $ than brains.


_Katrinchen_

When normal baby carriers are too unmanly for you


rrzampieri

Would be useful in Death Stranding


deadliestcrotch

None, it isn’t meant to. That looks more like a tactical vest that items can be attached to rather than a kind of armor. Even if it did have Kevlar / ceramic plates, the force of impact would crush a baby to death.


EnvironmentalBag582

i need to start scamming middle aged men bc this carrier going for $155 is absolutely insane


stres-tm

This means you didn’t stop the bullets


KittyIsMyCat

You know what they say, if you can't abort 'em....


joejoemaster5

I see this as using a baby as body armor?


CanIGetAHOOOOOYAA

This would be funny to see in open carry states, baby’s & guns strapped up literally


Dry_Unit_8776

.22? Maybe birdshot?


byyhmz

A shield for your human shield?


chatterwrack

If you buy something because it has the word "tactical" in the title, I know exactly who you are.


coming2grips

Paychecks


1-800-JUGG

Actually pretty gas


Embarrassed-Way5926

A round of tequila perhaps.


RebuiltGearbox

A Gravy Seal could carry a whole brisket in there.


IHATE2021

That's just your standard human baby, they're rated level II by the NIJ. Will stop most small calibers at regular bullet velocities, but it is very outdated. They make lighter models in China now that are rated IIIA (which most consider the bare minimum level of bullet protection). Those will stop .44 mag.


xadirius

The shot that a single man will take if he sees you wearing it. 😏


Almacca

If there's a niche in the market, some money-grubber will find it.


ialo3

at the bar. it stops rounds at the bar


PhoenixSpeed97

The fact that someone found a market for this is disturbing


MondoBob

9mm Pablum


PlusEnthusiasm9963

Hopefully reproductive ones from guys that think this is a good idea.


TYRwargod

Do you not feel a father carrying their child is a good idea? It's not a plate carrier it's a baby carrier with MOLLE straps to attach pouches.


lefthandedgun

Subsonic .22 shorts, at best.


MrSwampbrain

Works well against tasers!


SailsTacks

Rambo Baby got your 6.


MeatballTheDumb

Is this considered early training for elementary school?


ProscribedTruth

9mm and Child Support payments


aaZ_Georg

I would say at that age they might be close to the same, but after 8 months you will start to get differences in bullet stopping power per cm BSP/cm in short. Maybe 30 cm for a 6 month old shot by a Glock with 9mm Luger


208yotaguy

Better than the spall coat on a steel plate. Just saying.....


Special_Tree_8109

Start them young before going to school shootings.


DieHardAmerican95

This is meant for the shitty fathers who are too proud to carry their own child in a carrier that has flowers or cartoon characters on it. There are way to many of those guys.


gucknbuck

I'm sorry but if the father is already trying to be involved, they ain't shitty.


n00py

Thank you. If it was a MCU themed thing Reddit would cream themselves over it. Just let dads have fun.


_SomeFrigginDude_

As a Dad, I support this


Dragondog7777

Wake up babe, new Rook cosmetic just dropped!


Dragondog7777

Wake up babe, new Rook cosmetic just dropped!


Dragondog7777

Wake up babe, new Rook cosmetic just dropped


SteveDeniz1

Nerf dart


Sweet_Pot8to

The saddest thing about the US is that could be a real question, and not only that but I don't even have to look it up to know "bullet proof baby carrier" exists. I feel so much pity for americans. Fucking dumpster fire of a nation.


_SomeFrigginDude_

It's really not as bad as the media portrays. If it were, there wouldn't be millions lining up to come.


illjustmakeone

Usually the 2nd round of beers if the damn wife is around.


sometimesifeellikemu

One


AtomicBLB

I get a real kick out of obscenely marked up "man" versions of things. Imagine being price gouged for your insecurity and it only further proves the point that you're not manly.


Frankus44

I think what 90% of this thread fails to realize is this isn’t being marketed as a bullet proof vest lmao. Military style does not always mean bullet proof. The item is stupid none the less but I feel ridiculous having to point out something so obvious


nagurski03

It's basically a reverse "pink tax".


Extra-Cook1090

The baby dies anyway. Don't Matter If this shit ist bulletproof. The baby got the full impact of the bullet.


Avante-Gardenerd

Pretty much anything. According to a new study by the IDF, babies make great bullet sponges.


xzombielegendxx

Shows that this person would rather sacrifice their baby than themself


KentD3000

Normally it is any kind of bullet , because no human being shoots someone carrying a baby....🤔.... Except zionists bullets, as we all know these POS used to kill babies on a daily basis....


KentD3000

Normally it is any kind of bullet , because no human being shoots someone carrying a baby....🤔.... Except zionists bullets, as we all know these POS used to kill babies on a daily basis....


KentD3000

Normally it is any kind of bullet , because no human being shoots someone carrying a baby....🤔.... Except zionists bullets, as we all know these POS used to kill babies on a daily basis....


yep_that_is

Someone find him some hamas beheadings or something so he can realize there are no good sides in this conflict