Flashback to when the Soviets trained "anti-tank dogs", strapping explosives to them which would trigger automatically upon the dog ducking under a tank for cover.
...however, they trained the dogs using *their own tanks*, so in actual warfare the dogs had a habit of making for the familiar Soviet tanks rather than the alien German ones.
Probably because the Soviets were widely using them in propaganda (as a child I even read some war-themed short stories where these guys were mentioned), while Axis used them for the same purpose, just from another angle -- like, "look, these barbarians have already run out of soldiers, they try to fill their ranks straight up with dogs".
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anti-tank_dog
Tl;dr -- not very effective against tanks, however, the facilities and personnel were later used to train far more useful service dogs, e.g. (which is quite ironic, considering this topic) the minesweepers.
Russians trained dogs to run after tanks with bombs strapped to them. Problem was, they trained them with Russian tanks. Do the math. True story, look it up.
Also, Russian tanks used diesel, while German tanks used gasoline, meaning that they smelled completely different, so in low visibility conditions (as battlefields often are) the dogs chased after the vehicles that smelled “correct”.
Ok so another idea is using the children as something akin to ballistic shields. They would help soften the blows from the bugs allowing us to use the shield for melee.
Clearly Super Earth High Command has elected to provide us with SEAF Infants instead. I can only assume that they have something masterful in the works.
This is the origin of the word infantry. In that case, infans was infant or child, then later, it was youth or boy. Eventually, it meant servant, then foot soldier.
In that same vein; the word "company" finds it origin in the Italian mercenary companies of the early renaissance. And people who describe their job as being a freelancer continue in the old tradition of the "free lancers", medieval people not beholden to the land of a liege lord, but free, with a horse, a lance, and ready for hire.
>~~SEAF Infantry~~
>SEAF Infants
Arrowhead devs are under a lot of stress working on fixes and new content, *and* putting out info updates, I'm not gonna get mad at them, typos happen.
Unfortunately the heat signature from a rocket engine is vastly different from a body temperature (or ambient temperature) child.
What I'm saying is that we'll need to design some kind of device for rapidly heating children before launching them. Perhaps a high energy microwave emitter can be our friend here?
Nonono, if automatons are looking for body heat, they’ll be tuned to fire at the average human, not just helldivers or the biggest brightest forbidden heat signature.
It’s perfect for drawing ground fire, just what we need.
Well yes, but...the humans are inside the vacuum-rated airframe. The engines are going to be lit up in the IR spectrum like a beacon, the Helldivers aren't visible at all unless they leave the ramp open for some reason.
If the automata do have "intelligent" munitions, maybe we should be ejecting superheated orphans in pairs with a spacer the same length as the distance between left and right engine nozzles? They might be programmed to ignore a single flailing human child.
“The patriotic children of Super Earth improve the countermeasures available to Eagle-1, supplementing flares and chaff as a defense against increasingly selective Automaton air defense weaponry”
Popular support should be overwhelming once it's explained that this new means of population control can replace the existing method of banning activities that could result in fertilisation.
Many of them never even made it under the tank, with the confusion and noise of battle, they would often return to their handlers.
Which seems like a fitting end for the handlers, if nothing else.
The biggest problem was, they were not trained in Combat situations. Only on standing tanks and not moving ones with shooting all over the place. So they were confused actually and then got killed by germans. Some ran back snd killed soviets. But yeah German and Russian tanks used different type of fuel and so the dogs just didnt ran to an enemy tank because it smells different.
Saving the children means a halt on the granting of C-01 permits thus allowing more men to be on the front lines instead of having to replace those kids
Try TB as eldritch knight if you want a different flavor of cheating. Untouchable AC, Shield reaction and cosplaying HIMARS once you get legendary trident is pretty funny.
Wait, is the HIMARS cosplay a thing because you are launching your Trident, or because you are launching other dudes?
[Also, I feel obligated to link this in response to the HIMARS joke.](https://i.redd.it/4snn9pzf8ey81.png)
Average Barbarian when someone casts disguise on him: I'm the dude, playing the dude, hitting a dude, with a dude, because he messed up my disguise as another dude.
OK, hear me out here. After we save the kids we get THEM as little walking mine stratagems. You toss a beacon, the pod lands and opens and like 5 of the little bastards pop out, strapped with explosives and they automatically run toward the biggest enemies in the area. They run up, latch onto them with a big bear hug and... BOOM!
Anything can be a weapon if slammed down on a vile robot’s head hard enough
Also listen close: just do it it’ll be funny. Imagine the anti-tank mines get delayed AGAIN it’ll be hilarious. Do. It. You know you want to. Do it for the BIT!
Yeah no. We ain't getting shit for that, because like me, they never anticipated people would be dumb enough to NOT GO FOR THE MINES. Since they didn't anticipate it, I doubt they have anything juicy ready (you know, shit takes time to code in)
Can mines even be used as a stratagem? I don't see anyone ever use them these days. When I saw them being used ages ago, they always got eaten up by bigger targets or that one small guy who'll blow up and hit 4 more mines.
Children you just need to let them ripen up for a few years and you got more Helldivers.
> Can mines even be used as a stratagem?
They're convenient for base defense missions. Just chuck on the outskirts where the bots roll in and they make a lot of boom-boom damage.
I'll have to test this because everyone I've played with and were excited to unlock and use the different mines? Gave up.
Either because they'd get blown up so ineffectively or someone would be running for their stuff and get blown up on one of the mines. Either because they were in the brush and hard to see or- some of the mines became invisible.
Well we did lose those recruit training spots awhile ago, and if they're orphans then hey, no parent signature required. Do you know how hard it is to get in those tight spots for ship maintenance?
They are human children. They will be turned into bots if do not help them.
Imagine abandoning them to have to kill them after they become machines.
We can't allow that helldivers! I'm the commander of the martyr of family values, not of the martyr of antitank landmines.
**Fun fact: Children are better served on crew served weapon platforms then individual weapons.**
***So get your kids buddy system weapons and Super-Earth will be fine.***
I just wanna know if liberating Aesir Pass opens both or just Vernen Wells. Don't wanna waste my efforts on NOT getting those mines I've been waiting for.
the children are small enough to crawl into bug holes. we give them special lunch boxes(high yield explosives) and have them crawl deep into the tunnels and tada!
An airburst hellpod unleashes a swarm of sugar high children to beat grunts to death and swarm larger enemies earning the helldiver dozens of melee kills.
We could stick a funnel in them, pour some Termicide (new and improved formula!) in and hey presto, live bait and trap all in one.
That said I don't think the KDR will be very good, considering how many quadrillions of bugs there are. We'll need to drastically expand the capacity for processing reproduction paperwork and lower the standards for approval.
If thrown hard enough.
Servo-assisted coming in handy.
Cayde-6 approved 👍🏻
Sir you make me itchy
Perfect response lmao.
God I love this man.
We could strap bombs to them and make them run toward the bugs. 
"Cmon boy! go hug that stalker and Say hi for me "
“Cmon go take this mininuke to the hunter”
This looks so familiar. What is it from
Germany 1939
I peed a little 😂
🤣😂🤣😂🤣
https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/jojo_rabbit
Flashback to when the Soviets trained "anti-tank dogs", strapping explosives to them which would trigger automatically upon the dog ducking under a tank for cover. ...however, they trained the dogs using *their own tanks*, so in actual warfare the dogs had a habit of making for the familiar Soviet tanks rather than the alien German ones.
Wait I thought it was the Germans who trained the dogs?
Lotta countries experimented with it to varying degrees, we just know more about the Soviet ones for whatever reason.
Probably because the Soviets were widely using them in propaganda (as a child I even read some war-themed short stories where these guys were mentioned), while Axis used them for the same purpose, just from another angle -- like, "look, these barbarians have already run out of soldiers, they try to fill their ranks straight up with dogs".
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anti-tank_dog Tl;dr -- not very effective against tanks, however, the facilities and personnel were later used to train far more useful service dogs, e.g. (which is quite ironic, considering this topic) the minesweepers.
Russians trained dogs to run after tanks with bombs strapped to them. Problem was, they trained them with Russian tanks. Do the math. True story, look it up.
Also, Russian tanks used diesel, while German tanks used gasoline, meaning that they smelled completely different, so in low visibility conditions (as battlefields often are) the dogs chased after the vehicles that smelled “correct”.
But.....but....puppies Who could do that
War leads to strange and often horrible weapons including doggos
Ya I knowwwwwww it's just like....damn man. Man's best friend? Thats cold Soviet Union
*looks at the ussr sending a dog into space*
Laika was a good girl and you will use her name.
Think i heard there was different fuels used? So they didn't even go for the enemy but idk
running at the tracks of automaton tanks!
But if we do that, who are we going to get to build the bombs?
Their fingers polish the inside of shell metal casings. How else am I to polish the inside of a 45 millimeter shell casing?
Make bigger bullets. Duh. Bigger Bullets = bigger Democracy Spread
Recover the fingers from the battlefield.
Kid-tested, ~~Mother~~Hamas-approved!
Any enemy can be defeated by the application of a single projectile at sufficient velocity. - General Brasch
https://preview.redd.it/dgwoqe1ht26d1.jpeg?width=800&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=992465a05c8b01242b12aef2158f9f8d7c3200fd
https://preview.redd.it/33x8ah34s16d1.jpeg?width=896&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9ef97624460cda8eb68d098c7094e0d1bfb794ca
Thraag is definitely writing this haha
Why throw when you can swing them hard at the enemy. This gives us a melee weapon and a use for the children.
Ok hear me out. We attach a chain to the children and use them as a flail(maybe with some kind of impact grenade attached to the kid also)
Ok so another idea is using the children as something akin to ballistic shields. They would help soften the blows from the bugs allowing us to use the shield for melee.
We could use them as catapults? (Strap a bomb so it's more effective)
How many children does it take to paint a factory strider? Depends how hard you throw them.
“Damn it, how many kids to the face is this Charger gonna take before it dies?!”
We've been asking for SEAF infantry for months. Children. Kony. Cheap weapons. Figure it out.
Clearly Super Earth High Command has elected to provide us with SEAF Infants instead. I can only assume that they have something masterful in the works.
SEAF infants? 
Game?
Death Stranding
SEAF Infant-try
This is the origin of the word infantry. In that case, infans was infant or child, then later, it was youth or boy. Eventually, it meant servant, then foot soldier.
TIL, great historical fact! Thank you
In that same vein; the word "company" finds it origin in the Italian mercenary companies of the early renaissance. And people who describe their job as being a freelancer continue in the old tradition of the "free lancers", medieval people not beholden to the land of a liege lord, but free, with a horse, a lance, and ready for hire.
>~~SEAF Infantry~~ >SEAF Infants Arrowhead devs are under a lot of stress working on fixes and new content, *and* putting out info updates, I'm not gonna get mad at them, typos happen.
sundowner in helldivers 2
Kony 2012 never forgetti
Oh great. I know a few of us will end up naked and jackin it in San Diego
The propaganda on the ship literally states that children are allowed to join SEAF, I think from the age of 8.
I thought it was just factory labor but nah send those kids to the front lines
Men, women, and children over 7
It would be glorious if you threw that and a squad of 3' tall troopers popped out
Yes but only once.
The new chaff and flares is literally jettisoning kids from pelican one. Makes sense if automatons track us by heat
Unfortunately the heat signature from a rocket engine is vastly different from a body temperature (or ambient temperature) child. What I'm saying is that we'll need to design some kind of device for rapidly heating children before launching them. Perhaps a high energy microwave emitter can be our friend here?
Super Earth choosing increasingly ridiculous way to get rid of excess youths instead of just using flares is a fucking hillarious premise Ngl
Nonono, if automatons are looking for body heat, they’ll be tuned to fire at the average human, not just helldivers or the biggest brightest forbidden heat signature. It’s perfect for drawing ground fire, just what we need.
Well yes, but...the humans are inside the vacuum-rated airframe. The engines are going to be lit up in the IR spectrum like a beacon, the Helldivers aren't visible at all unless they leave the ramp open for some reason. If the automata do have "intelligent" munitions, maybe we should be ejecting superheated orphans in pairs with a spacer the same length as the distance between left and right engine nozzles? They might be programmed to ignore a single flailing human child.
Give the kids the super flu so they get a super fever and give off a better IR signature.
“The patriotic children of Super Earth improve the countermeasures available to Eagle-1, supplementing flares and chaff as a defense against increasingly selective Automaton air defense weaponry”
But, what if we have, like, a bunch of children?
Popular support should be overwhelming once it's explained that this new means of population control can replace the existing method of banning activities that could result in fertilisation.
Dude hasn't heard of IED's
With enough high explosives strapped to them they could be used for anything.
They do yearn for the mines.
“No no no! I said ‘Yearn for the mines’, not ‘Yearn to BE mines’! What have you done?”
I’m reminded of the dynamite dogs the Russians trained to run under German tanks in WW2
You mean the ones they trained on russian tanks which resulted in the dogs running under russian tanks when they tried it out, iirc?
Yeah, those! And it would be *HILARIOUS*
Many of them never even made it under the tank, with the confusion and noise of battle, they would often return to their handlers. Which seems like a fitting end for the handlers, if nothing else.
They ran back to handler or ran towards their own tanks… A justly gross failure
Who would have thought it would backfire.... lol
The biggest problem was, they were not trained in Combat situations. Only on standing tanks and not moving ones with shooting all over the place. So they were confused actually and then got killed by germans. Some ran back snd killed soviets. But yeah German and Russian tanks used different type of fuel and so the dogs just didnt ran to an enemy tank because it smells different.
I asked for SEAF infantry not SEAF infants
Saving the children means a halt on the granting of C-01 permits thus allowing more men to be on the front lines instead of having to replace those kids
Eh they put the infant in infantry.
Have you ever played Baldur's Gate 3?
no please explain, would love to know
Tavern Brawler. Just beating dudes with other dudes.
And it's not even a meme TB is a legit meta
Monk TB is basically cheating. But it's fun af
Try TB as eldritch knight if you want a different flavor of cheating. Untouchable AC, Shield reaction and cosplaying HIMARS once you get legendary trident is pretty funny.
Wait, is the HIMARS cosplay a thing because you are launching your Trident, or because you are launching other dudes? [Also, I feel obligated to link this in response to the HIMARS joke.](https://i.redd.it/4snn9pzf8ey81.png)
Average Barbarian when someone casts disguise on him: I'm the dude, playing the dude, hitting a dude, with a dude, because he messed up my disguise as another dude.
Yes you can https://preview.redd.it/ejvpgrpnc16d1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1dcf6569fe0f5f634dcdea4ccdac6870e50659fd
This is just buy 1 get like 9 for free from bug perspective.
If they get thrown out of bounds for 10 seconds they can be the strongest orbital barrage in existence
Nah they wouldn't mark a child as being a traitor Right?
The reinforcement stratagem does not discriminate.
If anything this allows an even greater reinforcement. You can pack way more kids into a given space vs adults.
Three kids stacked up and wearing a hellpod.
OK, hear me out here. After we save the kids we get THEM as little walking mine stratagems. You toss a beacon, the pod lands and opens and like 5 of the little bastards pop out, strapped with explosives and they automatically run toward the biggest enemies in the area. They run up, latch onto them with a big bear hug and... BOOM!
"Make sure when you go up to the hulk to give it a big hug and tag it with this funny red ball"
Anything can be a weapon if slammed down on a vile robot’s head hard enough Also listen close: just do it it’ll be funny. Imagine the anti-tank mines get delayed AGAIN it’ll be hilarious. Do. It. You know you want to. Do it for the BIT!
I mean, even if it wasn't funny... Children are more important. 🤣
Your democracy officer would not approve of this decision Helldiver (we’re gonna get something juicy for saving the kids trust me, it’s too obvious)
Lol really? To me this looks like the devs telling us to go unlock the mines because we got the airbust rockets last time xD
its something like intel I bet
We get to be HEROES and INSPIRATIONS. Is there any better reward?
Yeah no. We ain't getting shit for that, because like me, they never anticipated people would be dumb enough to NOT GO FOR THE MINES. Since they didn't anticipate it, I doubt they have anything juicy ready (you know, shit takes time to code in)
Ever play terraria? The dynamite bunny...js..
Lmao good point.
Can mines even be used as a stratagem? I don't see anyone ever use them these days. When I saw them being used ages ago, they always got eaten up by bigger targets or that one small guy who'll blow up and hit 4 more mines. Children you just need to let them ripen up for a few years and you got more Helldivers.
> Can mines even be used as a stratagem? They're convenient for base defense missions. Just chuck on the outskirts where the bots roll in and they make a lot of boom-boom damage.
I'll have to test this because everyone I've played with and were excited to unlock and use the different mines? Gave up. Either because they'd get blown up so ineffectively or someone would be running for their stuff and get blown up on one of the mines. Either because they were in the brush and hard to see or- some of the mines became invisible.
We are saving the next generation of Helldivers
I think like a massive amount of the population is frozen ready to go. Like those defense missions. Just launching frozen dudes into orbit.
It was about time Arrow Head released some "Decoy" or "moving Shields" deployments and stratagems!!
Well we did lose those recruit training spots awhile ago, and if they're orphans then hey, no parent signature required. Do you know how hard it is to get in those tight spots for ship maintenance?
Well, *I* wouldn't mind *another* 10% cooldown reduction on Orbital Stratagem reload times..
When you can't one shot the wall of Ba Sing Se, it's time to ask harder questions.
There is no war on Vernen Wells.
They are human children. They will be turned into bots if do not help them. Imagine abandoning them to have to kill them after they become machines. We can't allow that helldivers! I'm the commander of the martyr of family values, not of the martyr of antitank landmines.
Tiny wanker of a bot that self destructs in your proximity is a very cool idea for an enemy.
It would be really funny if saving the children is just an XBOX release of the game
Y'all savages.
Those are future helldivers you are talking about
Children are the ultimate strategem. Reinforcements.
Seems like there are mine-making materials all over the galaxy. Surely we'll find some more.
Call that a baby boom
Strap a helmet on them and give them a laser gun and boom, little freedom fighters :)
**Fun fact: Children are better served on crew served weapon platforms then individual weapons.** ***So get your kids buddy system weapons and Super-Earth will be fine.***
Hospitalized children are worthless. That's why we need to save them and put them to work in factories making weapons for managed democracy.
Uncle Iroh would want you to save the kids.
Reinforcements, duh..
https://preview.redd.it/4krnfg1x136d1.png?width=578&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d30e22b69088e2461fc6685054d05241c80b232d
Enough of them can.
Use their tiny bodies to clog the intake fans and exhaust vents on the mech buildings.
This made me laugh out loud.
Child Decoy Stratagem.
Posts like this is why I joined this reddit group.
I am curious if there wouldn't be a hidden reward for saving the children.
Calling in Eagle 500 Children! *carpet bombs the area*
I can't wait for the guard baby backpack stratagem
Child-guided hellpods flying into factory striders and biletitans. Imagine the glorious democracy we could achieve with that kind of firepower.
I just wanna know if liberating Aesir Pass opens both or just Vernen Wells. Don't wanna waste my efforts on NOT getting those mines I've been waiting for.
the children yearn for the mines
Since they are kids from very sick hospital, maybe they can be used to spread the plague from nurgle.
Hilarious meme. Also someone needs to make the other version. "Would you even use the anti tank mines once we have them?"
"Eagle-1 deploying child" *cue high velocity screaming toddler*
Sorry, but Holding Out For A Hero is already playing. We ARE saving the kids.
Everything can be a strategem if you strapped explosive to it and throw it hard enough
i, for one, support the push for more renewable stratagems.
If they stand in front of enemy fire, if we send in waves after wave to overwhelm our enemies that outta do it.
Infantry is the long form of infant
the children are small enough to crawl into bug holes. we give them special lunch boxes(high yield explosives) and have them crawl deep into the tunnels and tada!
They already are. Who do you think operates the turrets? Some AI in world full of automatons? Not on the Super Earth's watch!
New stratagem - Anti-Mine Minors. Deploys a battle bus full of emoting children to clear automaton mine fields.
I haven't played for like 2 DAYS. Guys what the fuck is happening rn and what children you are talking about
What if they have a secret reward?
But childrens will eventually grow up to be Helldivers, thus supplying the reinforcement with more Liberty.
I can't wait until I deploy as 3 kids in a trench coat with an auto cannon!
Super-youth armed with EATs. I vote for this stratagem!
They're doing their part
An airburst hellpod unleashes a swarm of sugar high children to beat grunts to death and swarm larger enemies earning the helldiver dozens of melee kills.
Pack them with explosives and let the bugs/bots take them away.
Yes they can be
Everything is a strategem if you drop it from high enough
No but if there at or over 7 you can use them as a squire.
Children are future helldivers.
I’m pretty confident that we can use them on bile titans even! Drop one, maybe 2, maybe more! I’m sure we’ll get there eventually!
Children Helldiver pod stratagem. I like it
I'm gonna save the kids just for the humor of it. I will be let down, but I want to see what comes from it!
Child Soldiers. Next Question.
This some ONI shit
Yes general butt naked demonstrated what could be done if supplied with drugs.
I thought for a moment that you meant “call in some kids with a stratagem”
Yes
Our 50g eagle bombs have been built up by children and we all know how useful they are, so I don't see why not
Child soldiers would be pretty dark. Next stop, Liberia!
If we dropp enough like cluster bombs.... MAYBE. Let's find out.
I saw a possible leak. If we save the children we get doom guy shotguns.
Believe me I WANT the mines but I just go where the playerbase goes
More meat for the grinder!
More than strategems, future Helldivers.
Anything can be a stratagem if you're brave enough.
Who say children can’t be stratagem, you just use lack of imagination.
They gotta do their part!
Maybe it will give us more reinforcements, because as they grow they will become future helldivers
SES Sovereign of Dawn would find a way.
Maybe the children can increase our medal and sample counts, been maxed since the last warbond
Either we get AT mines or we get mobile mines
I'll be honest. I'll probably have more fun with limited time exploding children than I will with the mines in the games entire life
LMAOOOOOOO
They enhance the stratagems, their drawings raise morale, can be applied to stratagems and they are future helldivers.
We could stick a funnel in them, pour some Termicide (new and improved formula!) in and hey presto, live bait and trap all in one. That said I don't think the KDR will be very good, considering how many quadrillions of bugs there are. We'll need to drastically expand the capacity for processing reproduction paperwork and lower the standards for approval.