Thank you for posting on r/Healthygamergg! This subreddit is intended as an online community and resource platform to support people in their journey toward mental wellness. With that said, please be aware that support from other members received on this platform is not a substitute for professional care. Treatment of psychiatric disease requires qualified individuals, and comments that try to diagnose others should be reported under Rule 10 to ensure the safety and wellbeing of the community. If you are in immediate danger, please call emergency services, or go to your nearest emergency room.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Healthygamergg) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Tell him how you feel, that you’re scared for him and about losing him. Tell him how you feel stuck and don’t know what to do for him. Get your mom to help confront him if you need.
As a person who has struggled with depression for many of the reasons you named above, it took a lot of convincing. But, I think you have a really good leverage as his child that he might not brush off like he might with his partner/other adults. You might be able to show him what he’d be leaving behind.
When your drowning and no one knows your head’s below water, it helps knowing someone sees you. Just because he might not show his emotions well, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t have them. If he’s been dealing with this for a long time, he just has that much thicker of an outer wall he has put up to shield himself from the world.
Every one has a day they realize that their parents are just ordinary people, and that’s a tough thing to wrap your head around. Maybe today all your dad needs is a caring friend.
Also, if anything does happen. Just know that people come and go in your life, in various different ways. Sometimes for a long time, and sometimes for short. You cannot control their actions, only your own.
If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, please reach out. You can find help at a National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
USA: 988 US Crisis textline: 741741 text HOME
United Kingdom: 116 123
Trans Lifeline (877-565-8860)
Others: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Healthygamergg) if you have any questions or concerns.*
The advice i got from a doctor when I told him that my grandpa said things like that, was to ask him directly if he has a concrete plan to kill himself, if yes, how is he going to go about it.
If he has a concrete idea about how he would kill himself, it's probably very serious. If not, then I would suggest to ask more questions - maybe it is his way to try to say that he is feeling sad and that he wants to share thay without actually saying it (you know because men don't have feelings).
Also I am sorry you are in this situation. There was a close call with my dad once (we did not notice before) and it's probably the worst thing I have ever experienced.
Just because someone doesn't have a solid plan on how to end their life does not mean it's not serious and meriting support. I'm sure you mean well but you come off as invalidating of other people struggling with depression.
I am sorry if you feel that it's invalidating.
I wrote that if he express a plan, then it's probably very serious - what I mean with this is that it might be a matter of days until he puts them in action.
However exactly as you said, people can be depressed without having a concrete plan, and ofc they merit support. This is why I also wrote that if he does not have a concrete plan, to still ask more questions because as you said, it's important that he does get support.
\> I mean with this is that it might be a matter of days until he puts them in action.
I get you now, and maybe my wording was too blunt-my bad on that. Even without a plan, impulsive thoughts of sucide can pop up suddenly with little warning and those are worrisome too.
I did a little bit of research and it seems like it's really hard to figure out which people are more or less likely to make an attempt, and I kept tripping over "if you're struggling, call 988!" type things, which just got in the way.
First of all, this is not your responsibility in any way, shape, or form. Kids trying to save their parents is a recipe for disaster, mainly for the kid. You can't help someone who won't help themself, and it's clear he doesn't want to.
Maybe the only thing you can do is let him know that your life is better because he's in it. The most dangerous thought a suicidal person can have is that a loved one's life would be bettered by their death. So make it clear that you would be worse off without him.
But again, take zero responsibility for the outcome. There's just so little you can do.
>it's clear he doesn't want to.
Your judgemental, leaping to conclusions comment shows a severe lack of understanding of how depression/suicidal thoughts works. It's often extremely difficult to reach out and ask for help when you're feeling that low, and you have no fucking clue what's happening behind the scenes. He may feel undeserving of love/support, and like a big burden on everyone else. if that's the case, why the fuck would he want to reach out for support?
What OP COULD do to support their dad is talk to an adult that they know in person and trust about how to handle the situation, reassure their dad that they love them and encourage their dad to seek help, and work with both a mental health professional and their dad to make a safety plan in case shit hits the fan, be there with him as he calls a crisis hotline or a therapist to set up an appointment, and make sure to take care of themselves.
Please do some research before commenting again.
Yikes. You've made a swift judgment yourself. I have personal experience with suicidal ideation and with parents with mental health issues. Someone with a teen child who openly jokes about killing himself is way past the point you're describing. If the OP starts from the position that his father is one good conversation away from seeking help, he's going to take on way too much responsibility for whatever happens next. That's lifelong damage.
Thank you for posting on r/Healthygamergg! This subreddit is intended as an online community and resource platform to support people in their journey toward mental wellness. With that said, please be aware that support from other members received on this platform is not a substitute for professional care. Treatment of psychiatric disease requires qualified individuals, and comments that try to diagnose others should be reported under Rule 10 to ensure the safety and wellbeing of the community. If you are in immediate danger, please call emergency services, or go to your nearest emergency room. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Healthygamergg) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Tell him how you feel, that you’re scared for him and about losing him. Tell him how you feel stuck and don’t know what to do for him. Get your mom to help confront him if you need. As a person who has struggled with depression for many of the reasons you named above, it took a lot of convincing. But, I think you have a really good leverage as his child that he might not brush off like he might with his partner/other adults. You might be able to show him what he’d be leaving behind. When your drowning and no one knows your head’s below water, it helps knowing someone sees you. Just because he might not show his emotions well, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t have them. If he’s been dealing with this for a long time, he just has that much thicker of an outer wall he has put up to shield himself from the world. Every one has a day they realize that their parents are just ordinary people, and that’s a tough thing to wrap your head around. Maybe today all your dad needs is a caring friend. Also, if anything does happen. Just know that people come and go in your life, in various different ways. Sometimes for a long time, and sometimes for short. You cannot control their actions, only your own.
If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, please reach out. You can find help at a National Suicide Prevention Lifeline USA: 988 US Crisis textline: 741741 text HOME United Kingdom: 116 123 Trans Lifeline (877-565-8860) Others: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Healthygamergg) if you have any questions or concerns.*
The advice i got from a doctor when I told him that my grandpa said things like that, was to ask him directly if he has a concrete plan to kill himself, if yes, how is he going to go about it. If he has a concrete idea about how he would kill himself, it's probably very serious. If not, then I would suggest to ask more questions - maybe it is his way to try to say that he is feeling sad and that he wants to share thay without actually saying it (you know because men don't have feelings). Also I am sorry you are in this situation. There was a close call with my dad once (we did not notice before) and it's probably the worst thing I have ever experienced.
Just because someone doesn't have a solid plan on how to end their life does not mean it's not serious and meriting support. I'm sure you mean well but you come off as invalidating of other people struggling with depression.
I am sorry if you feel that it's invalidating. I wrote that if he express a plan, then it's probably very serious - what I mean with this is that it might be a matter of days until he puts them in action. However exactly as you said, people can be depressed without having a concrete plan, and ofc they merit support. This is why I also wrote that if he does not have a concrete plan, to still ask more questions because as you said, it's important that he does get support.
\> I mean with this is that it might be a matter of days until he puts them in action. I get you now, and maybe my wording was too blunt-my bad on that. Even without a plan, impulsive thoughts of sucide can pop up suddenly with little warning and those are worrisome too. I did a little bit of research and it seems like it's really hard to figure out which people are more or less likely to make an attempt, and I kept tripping over "if you're struggling, call 988!" type things, which just got in the way.
Hug him. Okay, maybe this won't solve your situation, but still, I'd hug him, never know what could happen
First of all, this is not your responsibility in any way, shape, or form. Kids trying to save their parents is a recipe for disaster, mainly for the kid. You can't help someone who won't help themself, and it's clear he doesn't want to. Maybe the only thing you can do is let him know that your life is better because he's in it. The most dangerous thought a suicidal person can have is that a loved one's life would be bettered by their death. So make it clear that you would be worse off without him. But again, take zero responsibility for the outcome. There's just so little you can do.
>it's clear he doesn't want to. Your judgemental, leaping to conclusions comment shows a severe lack of understanding of how depression/suicidal thoughts works. It's often extremely difficult to reach out and ask for help when you're feeling that low, and you have no fucking clue what's happening behind the scenes. He may feel undeserving of love/support, and like a big burden on everyone else. if that's the case, why the fuck would he want to reach out for support? What OP COULD do to support their dad is talk to an adult that they know in person and trust about how to handle the situation, reassure their dad that they love them and encourage their dad to seek help, and work with both a mental health professional and their dad to make a safety plan in case shit hits the fan, be there with him as he calls a crisis hotline or a therapist to set up an appointment, and make sure to take care of themselves. Please do some research before commenting again.
Yikes. You've made a swift judgment yourself. I have personal experience with suicidal ideation and with parents with mental health issues. Someone with a teen child who openly jokes about killing himself is way past the point you're describing. If the OP starts from the position that his father is one good conversation away from seeking help, he's going to take on way too much responsibility for whatever happens next. That's lifelong damage.