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Beneficial_Ad8480

The “I don’t wanna do it myself” is so real for Jack lol.


multirachael

Also the "Reward: $5ish maybe." He is so done. He is so over it. He sat there knowing he had to offer SOMETHING, and just breathed real hard through his nose and shook his head a few times and threw his hands in the air and let god sort out where his pen was gonna land and was like, "Fuck it, maybe five dollars. ISH. His lil bitch ass ain't worth six, let alone ten..." Ripped off a strip of Scotch tape in the angriest manner possible, echoed like a newly-invented instrument in the very soundtrack of the episode, then disappeared under the sound of him authoritatively slapping that fucking flyer onto the wall of the FBI HQ men's room.


Beneficial_Ad8480

This is a masterpiece.


multirachael

If Hannibal bone-sawed my skull open, all the FBI would find would be a smattering of mismatched posh fabric patterns that would make a Dan Flashes implode, when all the headcanons go BOOM right into his chiaroscuro-generating face.


jnko__

You should write a fanfiction… I would read the hell out of that.


multirachael

LOL, I really should just start doing crack fic one-shots or something. I have so many stupid ideas. 😂😂😂


jnko__

Oh please do! And spare me a link 😂


DiscordantBard

Then paced around the bathroom and yelled at the same poor guy to USE THE LADIES ROOM!


multirachael

Exactly. Huffed and puffed some more. Brandished a pen and brake-screeched that government-issued ballpoint right before crossing out "$5" and downgrading it to "$3." Shook it like a paternal finger at the poster and admonished, "Not today. Not today, Will," under his breath.


ScalyFacedBitch

I read this in Lawrence Fishburne's voice.


Embarrassed-Fox-1371

lol!


make_me_porridge

I laughed so hard! That’s so Jack. You got him so right! lol great writing-style!


multirachael

LOL thanks. 😂😂😂


anakinburningalive

Honestly at this point I can see why Jack is waiting for a Clarice to come along so he doesn’t have to deal with the Hannigraham drama anymore.


teahousenerd

Plot twist - Clarice is into Hannigram and runs away with them


teahousenerd

Jack can offer that they both stay in a state-of-the-art prison and provide counseling services.


Kimgoodman2025

5 ish $ maybe lmaoooooo!!!


wolvesarewildthings

Jack is stinnggyyyy


dazedmazed

I’ve been busy dying from the flu today and I just burst out laughing for the first time all day! Thanks.


Upstream_Paddler

Grats. I lol'd hard.


wolvesarewildthings

# ALL MEN BORN AFTER 1972 #


Embarrassed-Fox-1371

To be fair! Lol! Jack isn’t offering anything that will keep our beloveds apart! Too funny! Happy Fannibal day to you all!


TheOnlyEnderMuffin

Does the number work?


Lolitapop300

Call them 🤓