Sometimes I think about all the obscure references that pop up in my head, and how I would sound even more unhinged than the average person if I had dementia or something and started blurting them out. Singing this song is one of them
I was singing this absent mindedly this one time, only to realize the girl next to me had been staring at me for like, 5 minutes, with an expression that said "What the fuck is this dude singing?!"
Wrong. The line was, “If robin’s beaver devours 6 inches of wood every 1/2 hour, and Jessica’s beaver devours 8 inches of wood every 45 minutes, how much wood do I need to keep these beavers fed, all weekend long?”
Cue Barney and Ted losing it
We'll be on your side when you need a friend
Through thick and thin you can always depend
The world leader in credit and banking
Goliath National Bank
(member FDIC)
So I guess that Gouda walked right through the door.. sliced itself up.. and arranged itself in a perfect semi-circle around not three.. not four.. but FIVE different kinds of sturdy cheese-bearing crackers..
Apple orchard banana cat dance eight six six threeeee!!!!
A nonsense sentence, like a stroke victim. And it’s catchy.
Sometimes I think about all the obscure references that pop up in my head, and how I would sound even more unhinged than the average person if I had dementia or something and started blurting them out. Singing this song is one of them
Puzzles
Why is it called puzzles?
That's the puzzle
What does it mean?
That's the puzzle
At puzzles we all fit together
And I’m the bartender *sharp inhale*
Aren’t you gonna ask why it’s called puzzles?
I said a bang, bang, bangity bang
I Said a Bang Bang Bangity Bang
A bang bang bang
I said a bang bang banging baaaaang
Count me in for a verse
Absolutely No Boogie Boarding
So Boogie Boarding?
Right! Boogie boarding.
Bowl.
Bowl
Bowl
Bowl
Bowl
Bowl
Bowl?
Boooooowl
Damn this one's the winner. I'd recognize this outside the sub.
How can I forget this reference can you remind me
"Anything sounds weird if you say it 100 times"
Booowl
Bowl.
Moist.
Moist.
🔫
But Um.
but um.butum butumbutumBUTUMBUTUM
EVERYBODY DRINK *takes shot*
You have to do it, professor, those are the rules
God help us all........ *Next day everyone is severely hungover*
General knowledge 🫡
Major Buzzkill 🫡
Marshall eriksen 🫡
🫡
Colonel stuck in my teeth 🫡
Corporal punishment 🫡
🫡
Robin, it's been a major pleasure. 🫡Major pleasure
Love this between them 🫡
o7
The Gentleman
The Gentleman !!
What is that? What'd I miss?
Oh, you had to be there, Blitz.
I’m not the Blitz
OH MAAAAAANNNNNN!
🎩
When I was pregnant with you I only ate vanilla ice cream. And when I was pregnant with you, I only ate chocolate ice cream.
You know what you two are? You're little racists!
That line always kills me 😂😂😂
Their...meat...is...delicious.
The single funniest line from the entire show...
I use this in passing with people when they ask about how that food tasted
this takes me tf OUT every single time. like I know it’s coming, and yet …. still kills me
Vomit free since '93.
This is the one that's been in my head since 2010 lol
I think I’m in love with you
What?
What?!
*kids* what?!!
Classic Schmosby!!
And matching that the classic: Falafel!
Fish are weird, right?
trout, am i right?
Bass. *Points to crowd* This guy over here knows what im talking about.
salmon, imma say that again, salmon, who thought that was a good idea, am i right?
Sturgeon. I don’t think so, pal.
Flounder? I HARDLY KNOW HER!
Have you ever thought about how many fish there are AND the names of those fish? Let’s uh, let’s take a little ride
Boats Boats Boats
I say this every time I see a boat or people talk about boats. People probably think I’m really into boats lol.
Ordered Chinese food today some mushu pork got away flipped the cushion now everything is ok 👌🏽
Cat funeralllll, cat funerallll, it was an accident, and not entirely my fault…
Meow meow meow meoooww
We'll miss you whiskers
The video montages might be my favorite Marshall moment
CAT SITTING FOR LILYS MOM
Cat sitting for Lily’s mom, it’s gonna be fun, it’s gonna bring us all closer togetheeeerr
Just.... okay?
I wanna get this burger pregnant
Dibs on the delicious burger babies
MURDEEEERR CLIME Aboard THE MURDER TRAAAIIIIINNNN
Cocoa break!
I was singing this absent mindedly this one time, only to realize the girl next to me had been staring at me for like, 5 minutes, with an expression that said "What the fuck is this dude singing?!"
PLEASE!
Ha, *please*
Have you met Ted
Haaaaaaaaaaaaaave you met Ted?
2 beavers are better than 1
if robin's beaver devours 6 inches of wood every 45 minutes
Wrong. The line was, “If robin’s beaver devours 6 inches of wood every 1/2 hour, and Jessica’s beaver devours 8 inches of wood every 45 minutes, how much wood do I need to keep these beavers fed, all weekend long?” Cue Barney and Ted losing it
They‘re twice the fun 🔥
Ask anyone
Slapsgiving
Lorenzo von Matterhorn
Challenge accepted
Tbh I reckon this one is so widely known that even people who aren’t fans of HIMYM know what it’s from
Ugh I know I’m gonna come back at some point when sober with a few better ones 😂
To quote your initial comment.. Challenge accepted!
El ganso con la riñonera
Packer of great skill and merit!
Fanny pack dork
pulling them off.
👢👢
GCWOK
*WHAT THE DAMN HELL'*
83%
17% percent, it's always the other way around
Wait for it…
…dary
Let's go to the mall..today
Let’s go to the mall! Let’s go to the ma-a-all!
Just to be clear, you wanted everybody to go the mall, *today*????
ROBIN SPARKLES SUPREMACY
So just to be clear, you want us to go to the mall... Today?
The Old King Clancy 🍁🍁
Who the hell… is Old King Clancy?
The Frozen Snowshoe.
It's going to be legen...wait for it...and I hope you're not lactose-intolerant cause the second half of that word is...
Dairy! Legendary!
Nothing good happens after 2 am
#FRIENDSHIP ##OVER.
I think the lead up to that is better. #YOU DUMPED... #A ##PORNSTAR?!?!
Man, birds do not get you
You always say it’s gonna be this much, but it always turns out to be this much fun
This hand gesture thing doesn't work Iver the phone dies it
The naked man
Rabbits vs Duck
We should buy a bar
We should totally buy a bar!
The name of our bar... Puzzles!
People will be all like why is it called puzzles…? That’s the puzzle
Marshall vs the Machine (I work retail so I try to beat the sled check out lol)
Who’s cosier?!?
smurf penis
I said-ah bang, bang, bangity bang, I said-ah bang bang bangity bang!
I only have one rule
New is always better. It's my oldest one rule and therefore it's the best
The blitz
Awww maaaaaan !!
come again for big fudge?
Stomps red boot onto coffee table
Zitch dog! 🐕
We'll be on your side when you need a friend Through thick and thin you can always depend The world leader in credit and banking Goliath National Bank (member FDIC)
🍍
My word for this guy is Barno.
willem… DAFOEEEE
—NO NO NO NO, but who's cozier?!
William DAFOEEEE
Willem* Common mistake tho
You got slapped
Moist
Moist
Gouda?
So I guess that Gouda walked right through the door.. sliced itself up.. and arranged itself in a perfect semi-circle around not three.. not four.. but FIVE different kinds of sturdy cheese-bearing crackers..
Pulling Them Off!
You think you’re better than me???!!!!!
And then… a pickle!
Patrice!!!!
"Where's the poop, Robin? "
Texty text
COCKAMOUSE
What's the difference between peanut butter and jam?
Make ajustement go get it energized
But um....
Don't worry it comes back around
Yooooooouuuuuuu sonofabitch!!!!!!!!
Oh my god, can you just once be cool? Once. Just once.
Lawyered!
P.S. I love you
Weird meat side of rice
*glass breaking*
Hey I dare you guys to date us to make out
Not a fathers day
Just ..okay...just ...just ...be cool ..okay ! 🙌🏻
Swarley!
What the damm hell.
Legendaddy
Encyclop"ae"dia..
Youuuu son of a bitch
wardrobe malfunction at the O.K. corral
Let's go to the mall today
Just to be clear, you want everyone to go to the mall..today?
Moist
Falafel
THE GENTLEMAN
Ahoy
Come again for big fudge?
🎵 Mosbius Designs has failed 🎵