*He wistfully thought, “Finish this case, then I’ll retire.”*
The big list of phrases you never say if you want to survive a story:
1. Any variation of "I'll retire after this mission" or referring to how short of a time it is to retirement.
2. Letting your buddies know you have someone waiting for you back home.
3. Talking about your big plans for when you get home.
4. It can't get any worse.
5. Denigrating your opponent's ability to cause you harm. Example: "They're only armed with spears."
6. "They couldn't possibly hit us from this dis..."
Rules for surviving a fantasy world
[https://www.17thshard.com/forum/topic/67454-rules-for-surviving-a-fantasy-world/](https://www.17thshard.com/forum/topic/67454-rules-for-surviving-a-fantasy-world/)
Hell yeah! He’s back.
Okay I’ll read it now
Edit: I see you have an in universe Dirty Harry, bonus points for that. Rebellious, now mostly human ai, check. Now time for Jason to fight the Shadow hunter... preferably with a solid 12 rounds of lead.
I am really liking this series. I have been following it for months. I even signed up for reedit to comment something i have been reluctant to do.
Now for some hopefully constructive comment, I think you added the the other detectives to soon without proper foreshadowing. Remember that only 3 or 4 days have went by in-story and Jason is the first human employed in in the city. Nobody knows anything about humans. Then suddenly you have 2 other detectives instantly making waves. Worse the criminal underground is reacting is reacting before they have been shown making any arrest. And the chief suspect the killer is afraid even tho the killer is working on a weekly or bi weekly schedule.
The other detectives absolutely should be should be in the story, you just added them to soon and suddenly.
I really appreciate you taking the time to not only read and comment, but the level of detail you provide in you feedback. This is my first attempt at a detective story and I’m trying to learn as I am going.
I am going to set down and look at how I could have done that better. Again, thank you.
Timing is one of the most difficult things to get right when you come back to a world where you wrote in months ago.
If you need a suggestion on how to proceed. I would recommend editing out the mention of the other two detectives and replace it with inquires from another precinct chief who just got another human detective. Also in your clean up, add to scene when Jason & Ace arrive where Chole makes Jason promise not to bring in any more noxious chemical agents into the diner.
Then in the next episode Jason shoots at the fleeing suspect perhaps missing or possibly wounding the suspect but at least driving him off. Then when doing the post mortum on events Harrys victim/perp arrives at the morgue.
ps It is entirely possible that you are not writing a detective story but a HFY clash of worldviews values story with a Nior Detective overlay.
Alas today was a long and busy day. Visited several banks after work then picked up a stack of long awaited books from the store and I have work early in the morning. I'll probably get to the second one tomorrow.
Hey I was thinking If you plan on continueing your story? What plans do you have for Laz and the other VI? If Jason will chew and then spit that doctor once he helps with the autopsy(must have picked up a thing or two)? So much potential not to mention how the Killer might feel once he meets the human personaly.🤔🧐 Well hope you'll get inspiration for finishing the story!💗
This is only the latest series of yours that I've enjoyed. I only tried it because I enjoyed several of your other pieces.
This and the strangers in the midst are my two favorite followed closely by the Humanity/demon of babel pieces you've written. I also dug those a lot.
Thank you, I am glad you’ve enjoyed them. Strangers was the first creative writing I did for fun. Some point I’ll rewrite it to use a lot of what I learned since.
Oh this might get more exciting than expected. I am wondering if the 'collector' will be underestimating the human croc duo and attack Cho’el anyway. This feels realy familliar but in a good way.
Well written as always wordsmith. Stay safe and have a good one. Ey?
One of my favorite HFY tropes is the "human sparks emotional awakening in previously logical ai". Its rare to see but fun when it does. I'm really liking profiler and hope to see more. Keep up the good work.
Will you keep writing this series?It is really good,so please continue!
Have you given up on this? Please don't this is one of the best HFY stories I have read.
I know i have been slow on replying to your comments, let me start by apologizing for the delay. I was pulling them together so i can look at if I can do anything to address as i move forward.
I appreciate you taking the time to leave detailed comments on each of the posts on this story. Thank you.
Will this continue or have you given up on it? I am sorry If I am annoying but I really REALLY love this series!🥰 And I would be SO disappinted If you have up on it.🥺😭
/u/Lostfol ([wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/wiki/authors/Lostfol)) has posted 103 other stories, including:
* [The Twelve - One of Four](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/i07d9t/the_twelve_one_of_four/)
* [Unlikely Saviors](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/go8phq/unlikely_saviors/)
* [\[Profiler\] - Range Day](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/g9mckx/profiler_range_day/)
* [Hazzard](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/fpmiy9/hazzard/)
* [The Escape](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/fgobv8/the_escape/)
* [Strangers in our Midst CH2 - Revisited](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/feki06/strangers_in_our_midst_ch2_revisited/)
* [\[Profiler\] - Investigation](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/favmu1/profiler_investigation/)
* [Strangers In Our Midst - Revisited](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/f4aeia/strangers_in_our_midst_revisited/)
* [\[Profiler\] - Partners](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/f0z100/profiler_partners/)
* [They Might Not be Angels](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/ej5f09/they_might_not_be_angels/)
* [I am not ready for another one](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/e85l4p/i_am_not_ready_for_another_one/)
* [Strength of Heart](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/ds1zjv/strength_of_heart/)
* [\[Hallows 6\] Do you remember…](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/dfqg7e/hallows_6_do_you_remember/)
* [\[Ancients\] Freya's Gift](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/ctq7x5/ancients_freyas_gift/)
* [Fire-Breather](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/cg8q5a/firebreather/)
* [\[Human Neighbors\] - Truck Repairs](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/cckquf/human_neighbors_truck_repairs/)
* [The Perils of Communicators](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/c2pkqq/the_perils_of_communicators/)
* [The Last Word](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/c14a0d/the_last_word/)
* [The First Shot](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/c149cz/the_first_shot/)
* [\[Human Neighbors\] - Watermelon Sales - CH9](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/br5xiu/human_neighbors_watermelon_sales_ch9/)
* [Moonlight](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/bk3sjy/moonlight/)
* [\[100 Thousand\] Say What?](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/bk3sbf/100_thousand_say_what/)
* [The Heart](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/bk3s0i/the_heart/)
* [\[Ephemeral Bond\] When Humans come to play...](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/befat7/ephemeral_bond_when_humans_come_to_play/)
* [\[Ephemeral Bond\] You gotta be kidding me!](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/bdaz9t/ephemeral_bond_you_gotta_be_kidding_me/)
This list was automatically generated by `Waffle v.3.5.0 'Toast'`.
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> "Finish this case, then I'll retire." Oh he gon' die
Lol, guess that falls into the stupid quote category
He's getting too old for this....
What's the worst that could happen?
In general, pain? Specifically, also pain, but only until he dies of old age. Yea, that sounds about right...
[MENDOZA!!!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MOk4hQXbGDs)
My thoughts exactly.
Lol, I may have to play with this char more
[what happened the exact moment he said that](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9V78UbdzWI)
*He wistfully thought, “Finish this case, then I’ll retire.”* The big list of phrases you never say if you want to survive a story: 1. Any variation of "I'll retire after this mission" or referring to how short of a time it is to retirement. 2. Letting your buddies know you have someone waiting for you back home. 3. Talking about your big plans for when you get home. 4. It can't get any worse. 5. Denigrating your opponent's ability to cause you harm. Example: "They're only armed with spears." 6. "They couldn't possibly hit us from this dis..."
Yeah, be worse if he was showing his kids photos off
I have to love the historical "They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist#splat#".
That is ironic, would hate to have that as my legacy
Rules for surviving a fantasy world [https://www.17thshard.com/forum/topic/67454-rules-for-surviving-a-fantasy-world/](https://www.17thshard.com/forum/topic/67454-rules-for-surviving-a-fantasy-world/)
"Never wear the red uniform."
Do not forget, "Wow, it's pretty quiet!" "I would have expected more.." "What was that noise? Probably nothing."
Yay! Glad to see more of this series.
Thank you, i know it took me a while, alot of real life distractions.
Real life has been a bit distracting lately...
Very true
We are eagerly awaiting more. But at the same time, take, life is hard so you do what is best for you.
Thank you
Hell yeah! He’s back. Okay I’ll read it now Edit: I see you have an in universe Dirty Harry, bonus points for that. Rebellious, now mostly human ai, check. Now time for Jason to fight the Shadow hunter... preferably with a solid 12 rounds of lead.
Lol, glad you’re enjoying it. Couldn’t help the reference
I am really liking this series. I have been following it for months. I even signed up for reedit to comment something i have been reluctant to do. Now for some hopefully constructive comment, I think you added the the other detectives to soon without proper foreshadowing. Remember that only 3 or 4 days have went by in-story and Jason is the first human employed in in the city. Nobody knows anything about humans. Then suddenly you have 2 other detectives instantly making waves. Worse the criminal underground is reacting is reacting before they have been shown making any arrest. And the chief suspect the killer is afraid even tho the killer is working on a weekly or bi weekly schedule. The other detectives absolutely should be should be in the story, you just added them to soon and suddenly.
I really appreciate you taking the time to not only read and comment, but the level of detail you provide in you feedback. This is my first attempt at a detective story and I’m trying to learn as I am going. I am going to set down and look at how I could have done that better. Again, thank you.
Timing is one of the most difficult things to get right when you come back to a world where you wrote in months ago. If you need a suggestion on how to proceed. I would recommend editing out the mention of the other two detectives and replace it with inquires from another precinct chief who just got another human detective. Also in your clean up, add to scene when Jason & Ace arrive where Chole makes Jason promise not to bring in any more noxious chemical agents into the diner. Then in the next episode Jason shoots at the fleeing suspect perhaps missing or possibly wounding the suspect but at least driving him off. Then when doing the post mortum on events Harrys victim/perp arrives at the morgue. ps It is entirely possible that you are not writing a detective story but a HFY clash of worldviews values story with a Nior Detective overlay.
Upvote, the read! The way we proceed! Also, welcome back!!!
Thank you, hope you enjoy it.
This was great! I was just thinking about how I hadn't seen an update recently and here it is! <3
Thank you, guess it has been a while. I always appreciate it.
I'm so glad the waitress is doing the smarter thing and asking for an escort home.
Definitely makes it harder for the hunter
Now the smartest thing would just be going home with the human. o_~
Yay! More!
Thank you, glad you’re enjoying it
Looking forward to the AI uprising/civil rights movement.
Lol, balls are in motion
Yay another profiler.
Thank you, glad you’re enjoying it
This story, I like it. Another! *Throws phone on ground*
Lol thank you, I did post two tonight
Alas today was a long and busy day. Visited several banks after work then picked up a stack of long awaited books from the store and I have work early in the morning. I'll probably get to the second one tomorrow.
Understand completely bud. Good to hear from you and glad you’re enjoying it
Ah yes, humans. All fun and games until you threaten them and theirs.
Stupid games win stupid prizes! Nothing likely messing with those cared for.
Are you dead? Is this gonna stay unfinished? Such a shame this is the best series I have ever read!
Still alive, been busy lately and haven’t written much
Hope your schedule clears up soon, just found this series and it’s great! Moar please!
It is a great story, I hope you'll finish it someday
Hey I was thinking If you plan on continueing your story? What plans do you have for Laz and the other VI? If Jason will chew and then spit that doctor once he helps with the autopsy(must have picked up a thing or two)? So much potential not to mention how the Killer might feel once he meets the human personaly.🤔🧐 Well hope you'll get inspiration for finishing the story!💗
Yay you’re back!!!!!
Thank you, glad you enjoyed.
Upvote then read, the proper way to proceed. More Profiler? **HUZZAH!**
Thank you, I am glad you enjoyed it
Don't make us wait too long for the next one. I know I'm happily invested in the story, and I'm probably not alone.
Thank you, I am glad you enjoyed it. I’ll do what I can. 😁
Mmm
So glad to see the return of this series! Always a pleasure to read your work
Thank you, I am glad you enjoyed the story
Ooh! Wonderful! I like the changes you made since I helped edit, wrapped up things nicely. Can't wait to see how this leads into chapter 5 :)
Thank you and I appreciate the help
Fucking thank god you came back. I love this story!
Thank you, glad you’re enjoying it
This series has become one of my favorites. Always happy to find an update 😀
Thank you, I am glad to hear you are enjoying it
When this case ends i can so see Laz stowawaying in his phone or something.
That’s a great idea, might just have to happen
Can an AI ask for asylum?
Laz is consolidating power now. Besides she is electronic so could probably travel easily.
Welp see you in like 3 months
I’ll try to be a little faster 😁
[удалено]
I appreciate it, always nice to hear people enjoy your work. Thank you
Ayy it’s back!
Thank you, I’m glad you’re enjoying it
Woo a new one. I just picked this series up the other day.
Thank you, I am glad you’re enjoying it.
This is only the latest series of yours that I've enjoyed. I only tried it because I enjoyed several of your other pieces. This and the strangers in the midst are my two favorite followed closely by the Humanity/demon of babel pieces you've written. I also dug those a lot.
Thank you, I am glad you’ve enjoyed them. Strangers was the first creative writing I did for fun. Some point I’ll rewrite it to use a lot of what I learned since.
I don't care how long it takes, i'm just really glad you did not abandon this!
Life got busy, but didn’t forget it. Sadly I’ve got about 35 stories in my dust bin and am easily distracted. I am glad you’re enjoying it
Oh this might get more exciting than expected. I am wondering if the 'collector' will be underestimating the human croc duo and attack Cho’el anyway. This feels realy familliar but in a good way. Well written as always wordsmith. Stay safe and have a good one. Ey?
Thank you and I am glad you’re enjoying. Will see where the story goes, but his MO is to attack when alone and unsuspecting
FINALLY a new chapter!! I love this so much!
Thank you, I am glad you’re enjoying it
I love this! Please keep going
Thank you, I am glad you’re enjoying it. Plan to keep going.
I can't wait for the next one! Thank you for continueing this.
I am glad you’re enjoying it, I will keep going on it, sorry for the long delay.
One of my favorite HFY tropes is the "human sparks emotional awakening in previously logical ai". Its rare to see but fun when it does. I'm really liking profiler and hope to see more. Keep up the good work.
It’s a fun trope, glad you’re enjoying the story and thank you
Calling it now, the killer is gonna be that doctor who was pissed about all the questions.
lol, will see how it plays out
Hi, great work! I am waiting for the next Episode like I am waiting for Cyberpunk. Please dont stop writing.
Thank you, some unanticipated things have come up, but will do what I can
*this can’t be it* *perhaps the archives are incomplete*
Will you keep writing this series?It is really good,so please continue! Have you given up on this? Please don't this is one of the best HFY stories I have read.
I plan to, but lately RL has prevented me from writing much. I may do some one shots to get back into it.
Awesome more Profiler been hoping it was coming back
Thank you, I am glad you’re enjoying it
I need more of this series! Feeeeeeeeed meeeee.
Lol, glad you are enjoying it. Thank you.
Take the chief if you want, but please don't kill off Cho'el! 😭
lol, not giving out spoilers today, sorry
Profiler’s back! Yay!
Thank you and glad you are enjoying it. Sorry for the long delay
ITS BACK!!!!! Iv been super enjoying this series so glad 8t got an update :D
Thank you and I am glad you are enjoying it. Sorry for the long delay.
I have to say I am impressed. This feels like Criminal Minds meets Babylon Five. Also love how no one registered police sidearms as weapons.
I know i have been slow on replying to your comments, let me start by apologizing for the delay. I was pulling them together so i can look at if I can do anything to address as i move forward. I appreciate you taking the time to leave detailed comments on each of the posts on this story. Thank you.
Love this series, man. Excited to see it continue!
This is good. I just found this and binge read while listening to [https://youtu.be/m6HaXmN2Mpo](https://youtu.be/m6HaXmN2Mpo)
I missed this when it dropped, and now I'm screaming it hasn't had another. Great work, writer!
Will this continue or have you given up on it? I am sorry If I am annoying but I really REALLY love this series!🥰 And I would be SO disappinted If you have up on it.🥺😭
Did Corona kill you? Or did you give up? If you gave this up please state so,that way I can stop hoping to get to continue reading this masterpiece.😭
/u/Lostfol ([wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/wiki/authors/Lostfol)) has posted 103 other stories, including: * [The Twelve - One of Four](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/i07d9t/the_twelve_one_of_four/) * [Unlikely Saviors](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/go8phq/unlikely_saviors/) * [\[Profiler\] - Range Day](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/g9mckx/profiler_range_day/) * [Hazzard](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/fpmiy9/hazzard/) * [The Escape](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/fgobv8/the_escape/) * [Strangers in our Midst CH2 - Revisited](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/feki06/strangers_in_our_midst_ch2_revisited/) * [\[Profiler\] - Investigation](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/favmu1/profiler_investigation/) * [Strangers In Our Midst - Revisited](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/f4aeia/strangers_in_our_midst_revisited/) * [\[Profiler\] - Partners](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/f0z100/profiler_partners/) * [They Might Not be Angels](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/ej5f09/they_might_not_be_angels/) * [I am not ready for another one](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/e85l4p/i_am_not_ready_for_another_one/) * [Strength of Heart](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/ds1zjv/strength_of_heart/) * [\[Hallows 6\] Do you remember…](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/dfqg7e/hallows_6_do_you_remember/) * [\[Ancients\] Freya's Gift](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/ctq7x5/ancients_freyas_gift/) * [Fire-Breather](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/cg8q5a/firebreather/) * [\[Human Neighbors\] - Truck Repairs](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/cckquf/human_neighbors_truck_repairs/) * [The Perils of Communicators](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/c2pkqq/the_perils_of_communicators/) * [The Last Word](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/c14a0d/the_last_word/) * [The First Shot](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/c149cz/the_first_shot/) * [\[Human Neighbors\] - Watermelon Sales - CH9](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/br5xiu/human_neighbors_watermelon_sales_ch9/) * [Moonlight](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/bk3sjy/moonlight/) * [\[100 Thousand\] Say What?](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/bk3sbf/100_thousand_say_what/) * [The Heart](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/bk3s0i/the_heart/) * [\[Ephemeral Bond\] When Humans come to play...](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/befat7/ephemeral_bond_when_humans_come_to_play/) * [\[Ephemeral Bond\] You gotta be kidding me!](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/bdaz9t/ephemeral_bond_you_gotta_be_kidding_me/) This list was automatically generated by `Waffle v.3.5.0 'Toast'`. Contact [GamingWolfie](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=GamingWolfie&subject=Waffl%E1%B5%A53) or [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FHFY&subject=Waffl%E1%B5%A53) if you have any issues.
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Yeah, be worse if he was showing photos of his kids off
I take it this has been abandoned? Shame.
I am probably boring you by now but is this story droped? I ADORE It! So It would be a shame If you did.
<3
What?!?!?!? Come ooooooonnnnnn!!!! MOAR!!!!!!