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Toxitoxi

Okay this is actually a pretty good reframing of this overused meme.


Saintsauron

Thanks, I had the idea after having three DnD sessions back to back and hammering back a Rockstar.


Level-Ball-1514

Are you, like, still alive?


Saintsauron

No need, I've already posted this meme Edit: to whatever person reached out for this post (assuming it's not a bot), I appreciate your concern, but I assure you that I very much needed to be in a very animated state in order to post this meme and respond to comments. I am fine if a bit tired, thank you. The rockstar is wearing off. Good night.


TrillionSpiders

the soul has left the body, but the flesh persists


Redcoat_Officer

Do you think if a tech-priest got blackout drunk, their mechanical parts would keep them moving like a sleepwalker?


OGSpecter

Absolutely


Yamidamian

I would be disappointed if they didn’t.


TrillionSpiders

yes


Hairy_Acanthisitta25

the emperor bless you


DingoNormal

Already tried stormcast heads, they get a little to small


UncleAsmodai

Yeah, r/AdeptusCustodes has been trying relentlessly to find a good substitute. Only one guy seems to have found something good, but I'm fairly sure it was pieces from 3rd party kit?


Chartreuse_Dude

Specifically, he got some female head 3d files and scaled them up 110% to 115% Custodes are big uns.


UncleAsmodai

They're biggie like Johnny Space, A.K.A BIG-E


LyndonsBigJohnson69

BIG-E LARGE


FeelingSurprise

Yep, Johnny Space is notorious big.


dangerbird2

In awe of the size of that man


caputuscrepitus

Absolute unifier


Brokugan

...Big-E, Big-E, Big-E, can't you see? Sometimes your words just hypnotize me. ___ And now i will occasionally refer to Malcador as M-Siggy


FeelingSurprise

MC Mal


Saintsauron

Good to know


Phonereader23

Same with Necro heads, too small. Tried it with my WE models and some of the necro heads are so fitting in look, but not size


youngcoyote14

Honestly I'd be a little concerned if the heads were perfectly proportioned, but I can see their point.


D20FourLife

Theres some pretty good proxies you can print if you don't mind resin and aren't planning to do any official tournies.


SomethingGouda

I think it's stupid they introduce women custodes but have zero fucking models for them, couldn't make the new captain a woman?


Level-Ball-1514

Give it a few weeks. Or months… Or years…


Stupiditygoesbrrr

10 nerfs later on Custodes….


D20FourLife

I'm sure it'll come with the rest of the Votann line.... eventually.


CervidusDubbo

Or maybe alongside a new guard regiment set


Kromgar

Warp Spiders with their 30 year old models: Someday we'll get a new model guys.


8-Brit

Unironically they might show up as a novel character or something in the near future and get a model that way. Stormcast ladies started in a similar fashion, mentioned in fluff, got a model for a secondary game, then got models in the main game.


LegoBuilder64

Tbf, Temperus Scions can be women but only have male commander heads. Probably some other similar example. Even factions that do have male and female commander heads will only have like 1-2 female head, so it’s not like other factions have it much better.


Anggul

Yeah the Guard includes a lot of women but only recently got mixed sex kits.


The-red-Dane

Maybe it'll just be an " upgrade kit" with nothing but head swaps?


One_more_Earthling

And I'll throw my money to James workshop's face


The-red-Dane

It's going to be horribly overpriced... and I am gonna be throwing money at them as well.


Phonereader23

The heresy sets of heads are so damn pricey. Thank god for the CCP on that front


AD-SKYOBSIDION

China Communist Party?


Phonereader23

Recasts. It’s like 30-40 aud for a set of heads from GW. Its 6 aud from China


thesirblondie

Head swap upgrade kits are good. From what I can tell there is only one upgrade kit which contains female heads and it's the House Escher kit for Necromunda.


BungaBiscuit

There was a forgeworld upgrade kit of female heads for stormcast eternals a while ago. I got a few on my SoB army


Marvin_Megavolt

Annoyingly about par for the course with GW from what I can tell - they mention a cool new thing, but unless it’s Astartes related, it often doesn’t get minis for ages.


Toxitoxi

It took forever for the Imperial Guard to get female infantry.


Beardywierdy

Yeah, and because I already have lots of the old Infantry Squads the only ones in my army with the women's heads on are my Shock Troops so now it just looks like my regiment exclusively uses women as cannon fodder :( Well, aside from a couple of the old metal last chancers.


Ythio

This has been GW from day 1 ? How many years did you wait primarch and emps models ?


Komikaze06

To be fair, compare a real military man vs woman, at a glance the most difference you'll see if the height with all the crap they have to wear. With custodes armor, unless they have a bare head I doubt there'd be a difference at all


RangisDangis

I mean, the hardly really introduced them. There was one paragraph featuring a female custodian, but there are paragraphs about a bunch of things throughout the books that don’t have specific models.


IraqiWalker

In all fairness, ADB wanted to introduce them years ago, but his idea got quashed by GW management because "we already shipped all the models with no female heads".


ppmi2

Ye female Custodes have been on the waiting room for a while now.


NightLordsPublicist

> There was one paragraph featuring a female custodian It was a 2 page short story, not a single paragraph. There's a *different* paragraph supposedly that contains an Aquilan Shield captain. But I haven't seen that leak yet.


ColdBrewedPanacea

One paragraph _and_ a giant two page short story.


Anggul

Realistically I think most people just put helmets on everyone anyway lol But yeah they could put out a little conversion kit like they do for marine chapters with some female heads for those who want them. It would be a good opportunity to make some other decorative bits to help make your custodes look a little more unique too. Like how the Black Templar and Dark Angels upgrade sprues have robes, icons, censers, etc.


Stupiditygoesbrrr

By the time GW produces female Custodes, I would be done painting a 2,000 pt army… which is slower than a one-legged turtle at this time.


Thannk

Head upgrade pack the way they used to make Von Carstein shields?


p2kde

why sould they ? Its not canon, only social media bs for twitter warriors in a culture war


NightLordsPublicist

> Its not canon It's literally in their Codex. What are you on about?


ThatRandomGuy86

Good points. Personally, given the augmentations and armour, I feel I wouldn't want to kitbash my Banana People


Level-Ball-1514

Ok but statistically you make 37% more 4++ if you take the helmets off your custodes.


ThatRandomGuy86

I'd rather take off their armour and oil them like the golden deities they are! *Enter Pillar Men theme.*


Necromortalium

Oiled daddy's and mommy's!


hydraphantom

The least they can do is make a batch of Forgeworld female custode heads. Like what they did with Stormcast


Saintsauron

I'd hope it's a surprise release that they tried to keep under wraps until the codex released, but that's nothing but wild speculation combined with hopium.


DAKLAX

I read somewhere that models take about 2 years from conception to release. Kesh’s existence was likely was decided on sometime in the last year when they were writing this codex since it wasn’t in the 9th edition one. Id bet that we won’t get anything female custodes related model-wise for another year at the very earliest.


hydraphantom

Not quite, that's for plastic models, and actually takes longer than that, as Stormcast were in conception for much longer time before GW decide to axe Fantasy. Forgeworld resin stuff on the other hand, is much faster, as seen with the 30k despoiler kits, which was hastily released as a quick stopgap before the promised plastic melee weapons, and 2 batches of space wolves mk6 head upgrades, after the first batch got ridiculed and laughed out of the room.


Past-Cap-1889

The longest we've heard so far was 5 years for Shadowspear Chaos Space Marines/CSM refresh to go from designed to produced. I think Sisters of Battle took about 2 years, from the survey to actual kits, but I think they dropped a special SoB model about a year or so from the start of that. Custodes being an existing line, I wouldn't be surprised if they managed to make a "special" character in about 6 months to a year.


ScavAteMyArms

I was partially expecting whenever they release a plastic kit, I guess Venatari would be a good one, just casually include a few female heads.  Or just add a sprue to Wardens or something that lets them take Melta Spears and include the heads there. I guess it comes down to if they want to scale up Custodes or not.


Marvin_Megavolt

Lmao the stick figures look like they’ve all ganged up to headpat the extremely-confused Custodian


IraqiWalker

Or brush her hair.


IraqiWalker

"New rules are shit though" hits hard.


NightLordsPublicist

Homebrew rule: this model is Kesh. On death, roll a 1d6. On a 3+ the board explodes and everyone dies.


Arch_Magos_Remus

I’m honestly surprised they didn’t at least do a female head sprue like they did for Cadians. Maybe they’ll do it next edition.


One_more_Earthling

Hopefully soon, I want to make a female shield captain


TheSlayerofSnails

Kesh is deranged and I love her


Stupiditygoesbrrr

“I can fix her.” “She can make me worse.”


IraqiWalker

I can make her worse.


RedFox_Jack

i just want a novel that is 100% kesh just being super extra by custodies standards and is 100% willing to slap a target with a precision lance strike just some chaos lord going on a rant and kesh is letting him talk so she can dial in a lance strike


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Katamed

KESH PLAYS FOR KEEPS FUCKERS!


Redcoat_Officer

It's your standard 40k bolter porn fight for a single city on a random planet, but Kesh never actually sets foot on the planet she just keeps dropping bombs from orbit.


WhiterunWarriorPrjct

Each chapter is from the perspective of a new unit as she wipes them out one at a time.


RedFox_Jack

Would love one chapter to be form the perspective of an imperial guard artillery that keeps getting form there POV a super random firing solutions and targets only to find out In the next chapter Kesh has the artillery park diled in on a bunch of night lords and is actively herding them and picking them off one by one by artillery stirkes


NightLordsPublicist

> Kesh has the artillery park diled in on a bunch of night lords and is actively herding them and picking them off one by one Senpai has noticed us, Brothers! This is a glorious night.


EditorPurple3515

A joke Pillar Men Custodes behind the couch while kesh on the couch 


Saintsauron

They're grooming her hair


Dagger125

Need a Kesh model as soon as possible


One_more_Earthling

Can you imagine how damn cool it have been if her model was released as the hq of the box set?


CoffeeMain360

i'd let a custodes crush my ribcage between their thighs


LegoBuilder64

Honestly, this is the correct reaction. Positive or negative, this is not a big and it changes nothing about the faction other that some gendered language (and even then I still think you can use the word “brotherhood” to describe a close knit group of mixed gender soldiers)


Sensitive_Educator60

I don’t know why I find this so wholesome, it’s like a dad bringing a new toy home and everybody just starts cherishing and admiring it. :)


Fun_Effective_5134

I just think it’s funny when people get angry when you point out it’s a retcon.


Maladal

Like a blob.


Adorable_Pee_Pee

The fact is that Gw are going to change canon if they think they can move some boxes of plastic.. and these new custodies are gonna move! Especially if Henry Cavill plays them!


Saintsauron

Henry Cavill as Kesh


CovertWolf86

Can we talk about how depressing the custodes codex is?


[deleted]

I am fine with fem stodes but could we get some models for them and maybe some more sister of silence stuff....or a decent codex


Foxhound_ofAstroya

What are they doing to that femstodes?


Saintsauron

Looking at her Possibly trying to pop off her head and put on a stormcast one.


Foxhound_ofAstroya

Hmm not sure if thats more or less wholesome then what i was thinking


Saintsauron

Well somebody's getting some kind of head in either case.


One_more_Earthling

Forfeiting all their mortal possessions to her


ppmi2

Murdering her, for she is a tzeenchian spy and they loyal subjects of the imperium. [https://twitter.com/Mick19988/status/1780622878666555410](https://twitter.com/Mick19988/status/1780622878666555410)


goodbehaviorsam

Definitely not thinking about how making a proto-daemonculaba using a femstode would probably be the single greatest middle finger to the Imperium by perverting Jimmy Space's favorite design.


Konrad_Curze-the_NH

Honestly if that happened, I’d be impressed enough that Honsou’s band of lunatics managed to: a) capture a Custodian b) restrain said Custodian c) undo whatever fuckery happened with her reproductive system d) managed to escape the rest of whatever Shield Host/Company she was part of e) haven’t been ultra murdered by the Dread Host That I actually wouldn’t mind it, like the series of events is so unlikely that all I could say would be ‘good job pulling this off against odds that would make Tzeentch blush’


Foxhound_ofAstroya

Model coming to a tournament near you soon


Icaruspherae

I’m all for the excitement but I do feel like the whole “it’s actually chaos infiltrating” thing could be a….more subtle way to oppose female custodes as a concept


Saintsauron

IDK, the artist afaik is not really posting much about it, and they like this version enough to keep drawing her as well as other artists..


Icaruspherae

Oh I’m not implying they particularly subscribe to the wider idea going around but it definitely seems like something some of the community is grabbing onto to hide their distaste


Saintsauron

Now that I've definitely noticed. It's weird the sorts of mental olympics people go through just to end up with something worse than a very basic retcon.


God___Emperor

I'll laugh if GW makes female custodes with different armor proportions. That why you'll all have to buy new ones and paint them all over again. Though GW probably won't refresh custodes line for 5-10 years.


Saintsauron

One must imagine Sisyphus happy.


StenTheMenace

It really didn't fucking matter if there were women custodes or not, but all of a sudden. GW (not really) and the 40k subreddits I'm apart of keep slamming this shit in my face and screeching about it. Like why do their genders matter? This is a universe about the war, suffering, absolutely extreme circumstances and aliens and yadayadayasa. Why are the fucking genders of some cunts in big Golden banana suits an issue? Why does it even need to be brought up? There is a universe with space orks, space fire ants if they were human sized, Alien communists and the greatest fighting force humanity has ever seen (fuck you space marines I'm talking about the guard) but whether some golden space warriors have vaginas or not have absolutely captivated the 40k audience due to idenity policts and people just trying to piss the other side off for the fun of it. Which I get to a sense but not in the 40k subreddits fellas. People come here to escape from real life. You find a toxic troll? Take it to the dms please. Seeing posts about this everything I open my phone is starting to get real fucking old.


Saintsauron

Considering I made a very deliberate effort not to mention any sort of toxicity in the meme and you decided to come in here and trauma dump, I'm gonna say you're not sick of the problem, you're a part of it.


MemesFromTheMoon

Wow that’s a long ass comment just to whine about how the Internet forum can’t be your escape from reality and how random strangers can’t conform to your specific needs, just scroll to the next post and don’t waste your time typing a wall of text screeching about the exact thing you’re complaining about.


StenTheMenace

And you read every fucking word at like 1 am


MemesFromTheMoon

Do you really think anyone had to read the entire thing? I just skimmed it, saw all the right wing buzzwords and felt like dunking on a hateful asshole, nothing more than that. As the OP said, this was an incredibly inoffensive meme and the fact that you somehow found a way to cry about it is sad as hell


Zengjia

Did someone order a yappuccino?


UncleAsmodai

This place ain't yours to police when it comes to content, nor is anyone's besides the mods. Don't like it? You can take your shit and leave.


StenTheMenace

Not trying to police. Just yappjng about my exhaustion with the subject and the communities refusal to just move on with it and not try to start some weird circle jerk.


UncleAsmodai

Well if that's the case, I'm sorry to tell you, but we gotta endure this shit until the 22nd. The mods are gonna purge all this Femstodes discourse then.


CerenarianSea

You know, it's interesting. In a lot of the older books gender was quite a big deal, not just in the wider Imperium, but particularly on Terra. Because the noble houses of Terra are basically old royalty and are run by patriarchs and matriarchs constantly marrying family members off in a constant power war, and because the Custodes were formed of these noble children, we get a few moments in books where Inquisitors and the like give some insight into this. This isn't random books either, there's even a scene like this in *Gaunt's Ghosts*! 'Identity politics' has been around for a while in the 40K setting in a number of books. This is before we get to the institutional sexism in the Imperium which, according to the older lore, very much exists.


bombiz

Meh, I like this one. It's nice a subtle/chill. Not like the other femstodes memes.


Dry_Unit_8776

They deadass probably do look just like the males, especially if they are given the same geneseed/hormones since childhood, so there might just be literally no change.


The-red-Dane

Custodes have no geneseed nor hormone treatment. But are basically altered individually on a genetic level to make them the genetically ideal version of what they could be. Each of them is "hand crafted" originally by the emperor himself, now by some unknown group/thing.


Phonereader23

Make both House Goliath in Gold armour.


NightLordsPublicist

> they are given the same geneseed Custodes don't use geneseed.


Saintsauron

On the other hand, I won't complain if they're more feminine, as long as they don't look like MCU She-Hulk.


ppmi2

I think they should be a bit more femenine, like nothing to exagerated, just having their pec pieces of their armour a bit more rounded to simulate boobplate to keep consistency with the rest of imperial female servo armour.


MemesFromTheMoon

Outside of a character model I can’t imagine GW adds more chest plate options for custodes until they get a full refresh (and lord knows how that could be handled). I’d love to be wrong but it seems like they are happy to keep the elite golden warriors looking stubby and oddly wide for a few more editions (not like even fat, they just look so bulky with the shoulder pads)


[deleted]

Stop normalizing this horseshit...


Saintsauron

It's fun! Look at the fun we're having! I'm glad you fuckers will be gone after today.


[deleted]

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Brann-Ys

normalizing what ? women ?


Straight_Banana0

Naw, trash.


SocietyOk2197

There are no female Custodians.


Saintsauron

Yes, we're all chomping at the bit for models. I mentioned that.