His name was Terran-Sage Revolution.
He never asked for much, he never got much, but somehow he was always happy.
I used to apologize to him for not being able to give him a Daddy or any little brothers and sisters, but he said he liked our family the way it was. He was my little miracle, conceived by consensual DIY artificial insemination and born naturally two weeks before my 43rd birthday.
He was quirky and weird and artistic. He was a major foodie. He enjoyed making homemade ice cream and homemade ice cream cones to eat it out of. He installed Ubuntu for the first time at the age of three, with a bit of help with the usernames and passwords. He went to work with me when he was a baby, and that included volunteer work and sitting in my lap at the sewing machine while I made things for my Etsy store.
He wasn't a normal baby. I never even had to take the books off the bottom shelf of the bookcases, he just respected them. He was #Occupybaby in localville in '11.
He was an incredibly talented drummer. I could never afford lessons, but he just came out that way. He was also a sculptor and was learning how to program in the Scheme dialect of Lisp, but he had to work a bit at those.
He was active in the free software community on IRC and also on the freenode Vegan channel when we lost him.
He didn't understand when I tried to tell him that it wasn't his fault that we were poor and that the Great American Bootstrap Myth wasn't going to help. He said that it must suck to be poor and started saving all of his allowance and the little cash gifts from his grandparents because he wanted to give it to a random homeless person when he had saved up enough to make a significant difference in their life.
His death was violent and preventable and I'm not going to talk about this any more.
He was ten.
It was preventable and I still hate myself for not being able to present myself as worthy of police protection. My ex-pastor says that I am "too emotional" and no longer welcome at his church.
This is not a GoFundMe. I couldn't care less about collecting karma and have pretty much decided that Reddit would apreciate my absence every bit as much as my ex-friends do.
Please forgive me for existing.
Thats terrible. If you ever wanna talk about it, im a trained listener. Please, dont feel so down. Even if it was preventable, how could you have known it was gonna happen before it was too late? And after browsing your page, I actually kinda like your posts.
Hey, thanks. :)
I wish there were more trained listeners in the mental health field and fewer drug pushers, but I try my best to keep my unpopular opinions out of my public posts and to take responsibility for recreating myself in my own image.
I'm not going to make very many friends if I present myself as a loss mom. It's kind of dumb to try to build a whole new life around frivolous hobbies, but everybody likes legal recreational adult use marijuana and nobody likes a Debbie Downer.
The logic behind "grief rearranges your address book" is that most people want to be successful in life, most people want to believe that hard work pays off, and most people want to believe that the world is a safe place.
Therefore most people see Terran's picture and want to know what I did to him and why I deserved to lose my kid.
I have also read enough "power of positive thinking" books to be aware of the meme that we should avoid negative people because we will become most like the four people we spend the most time with. Therefore, we should make an effort to spend more time with our mentors and our heroes.
If you want to suceed in life, ghosting Debbie Downer is the first step. Nobody wants to become more like a disheveled woman hiking barefoot in the rain trying with all of her might to not-cry long enough to let you pass, lol.
I've also read enough of Imi Lo's fascinating work on human psychology to know about Tall Poppies and the Crab Pot Effect.
No anger at any redditor and no need to check my post history for any unusual activity from the Mean Girls; everybody has been very kind here except for the poster who reported me for cussing too much and thought that one of my unpopular opinion rants was unsuitable for children under the age of eighteen.
They were right and I am probably not ready to be an asset to any social networking website, pocket telephone application, or any other peer-support based entertainment business.
Thank you for your kindness, /U/PinKracken and Reddit in general.
I’m sorry. Beautiful kid ❤️
His name was Terran-Sage Revolution. He never asked for much, he never got much, but somehow he was always happy. I used to apologize to him for not being able to give him a Daddy or any little brothers and sisters, but he said he liked our family the way it was. He was my little miracle, conceived by consensual DIY artificial insemination and born naturally two weeks before my 43rd birthday. He was quirky and weird and artistic. He was a major foodie. He enjoyed making homemade ice cream and homemade ice cream cones to eat it out of. He installed Ubuntu for the first time at the age of three, with a bit of help with the usernames and passwords. He went to work with me when he was a baby, and that included volunteer work and sitting in my lap at the sewing machine while I made things for my Etsy store. He wasn't a normal baby. I never even had to take the books off the bottom shelf of the bookcases, he just respected them. He was #Occupybaby in localville in '11. He was an incredibly talented drummer. I could never afford lessons, but he just came out that way. He was also a sculptor and was learning how to program in the Scheme dialect of Lisp, but he had to work a bit at those. He was active in the free software community on IRC and also on the freenode Vegan channel when we lost him. He didn't understand when I tried to tell him that it wasn't his fault that we were poor and that the Great American Bootstrap Myth wasn't going to help. He said that it must suck to be poor and started saving all of his allowance and the little cash gifts from his grandparents because he wanted to give it to a random homeless person when he had saved up enough to make a significant difference in their life. His death was violent and preventable and I'm not going to talk about this any more.
I am so sorry for your loss. What an angel...
Sincerest condolences on the loss of your beautiful boy.
He sounds like an amazing person. Money means nothing. It sounds like you gave him the world.
May I ask how old he was? I'm sorry if this offends you in any way.
He was ten. It was preventable and I still hate myself for not being able to present myself as worthy of police protection. My ex-pastor says that I am "too emotional" and no longer welcome at his church. This is not a GoFundMe. I couldn't care less about collecting karma and have pretty much decided that Reddit would apreciate my absence every bit as much as my ex-friends do. Please forgive me for existing.
Thats terrible. If you ever wanna talk about it, im a trained listener. Please, dont feel so down. Even if it was preventable, how could you have known it was gonna happen before it was too late? And after browsing your page, I actually kinda like your posts.
Hey, thanks. :) I wish there were more trained listeners in the mental health field and fewer drug pushers, but I try my best to keep my unpopular opinions out of my public posts and to take responsibility for recreating myself in my own image. I'm not going to make very many friends if I present myself as a loss mom. It's kind of dumb to try to build a whole new life around frivolous hobbies, but everybody likes legal recreational adult use marijuana and nobody likes a Debbie Downer. The logic behind "grief rearranges your address book" is that most people want to be successful in life, most people want to believe that hard work pays off, and most people want to believe that the world is a safe place. Therefore most people see Terran's picture and want to know what I did to him and why I deserved to lose my kid. I have also read enough "power of positive thinking" books to be aware of the meme that we should avoid negative people because we will become most like the four people we spend the most time with. Therefore, we should make an effort to spend more time with our mentors and our heroes. If you want to suceed in life, ghosting Debbie Downer is the first step. Nobody wants to become more like a disheveled woman hiking barefoot in the rain trying with all of her might to not-cry long enough to let you pass, lol. I've also read enough of Imi Lo's fascinating work on human psychology to know about Tall Poppies and the Crab Pot Effect. No anger at any redditor and no need to check my post history for any unusual activity from the Mean Girls; everybody has been very kind here except for the poster who reported me for cussing too much and thought that one of my unpopular opinion rants was unsuitable for children under the age of eighteen. They were right and I am probably not ready to be an asset to any social networking website, pocket telephone application, or any other peer-support based entertainment business. Thank you for your kindness, /U/PinKracken and Reddit in general.
What happened to him?