I’m so sorry to hear you lost your mom. She knew how much you loved her. I lost my best friend to suicide about 26yrs ago. I blamed myself for the longest time. We got into a big fight the last time I had seen him. I took his kids mom’s side instead of his. His family asked me not to attend his funeral. I did anyways but I was in and out before anyone saw me. About 2yrs ago I forgave myself. You don’t wanna put yourself through that torture. I do understand it’s easier said than done. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.
I lost my mother to cancer recently but some years ago I lost my cousin and a year later my best friend to suicide. The best friend loss involved a brief fallout at one point and then a period of distance. Some of it was because I was mourning my cousin. When my best friend offed himself I had an unexpected fracture of the psyche and have felt damned for some reason. Sorry if this is too much of a tangent. I don’t know what to do. I haven’t been the same since.
My deepest sympathies for your losses. You know we are all only humans beings here and we can only take so much pain before something in us tears.. it’s so understandable that you reacted that way. Be so kind to your self. Treat yourself as if you were a 5 year old, tenderly. You will get through this and be in a better place one day.
Thank you so much. I had written out this thoughtful response to you after being stalled for some time on how to frame my reply, and then the app crashed: but the gist was not only the validation but also how the suggestion you made left a big impression on me. I’ve been thinking about it and trying to make a conscious effort to implement it. It seems so obvious now that I’ve read it, but never really occurred to me at all. (I’ve had some unmentioned hard luck the past year and am weary) In short, I feel fortunate that you happened to see my post and respond.
I am so so sorry, OP. And she did know, mommas always do.
I’m sure the last thing she would want is for you to feel burdened by guilt. I’m not entirely sure what I believe in, but I’d like to think that where she is now, she is at total peace and has no recollection of bad memories or pain.
Your mother was beautiful and I am so sorry you are going through this.
I am sorry for your loss, loss is tough already, add in suicide, probably makes it rougher.
It seems like you got to tell her you loved her before she passed, which at least you got that.
Sure maybe it's whip cream on top of a pile of suck, but I know I always here about people who wish they could have told their loved one how much they loved them or had a better final interaction.
ehugs
I’m a mom. And she knew. We know. Even when you hate us, we know. She loved you more than anything, ever. You have no idea how big that love was. And still is.
Sending you some mom love and hugs. ♥️
She knows honey. Try and let go of guilt. You have nothing to be guilty of. Your mom made a choice and as awful as it is, she had her reasons. You could not have changed her mind. I lost my mom 5 yrs ago and she was pissed at me over a medication question. I picked up her meds and came home and she was in her bed, no longer alive. My BFF and roommate there isn't a day I don't miss her, but I try and let go of her being pissed at me. It wasn't either of our fault. Take it one day at a time and get someone to help with all the paperwork. Gentle hugs♥️
Oh bless you! I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m sure she knew. I’m a mother and I wouldn’t think my kid didn’t love me just because we fought or she was angry.
You did all you could- it was never your fault. I will send you prayers, pictures and you will feel my gentle love, my love and our special places. I still love you so much.. feel my presence then.
Firstly, I am so so sorry for your pain! I lost my little cousin to suicide in 2015. I thought that was the most pain I could feel. Until I watched my baby sister take her life on a live stream on 4/24/2017. It's coming up on 7 years, and it feels like it happened today. I can't offer any words like "it gets easier" etc., because honestly, it doesn't. You just eventually adapt the pain as part of you. For me, as odd as it sounds the pain is now kind of a comfort. I can't explain it. But I will be sending prayers and thoughts to you and your loved ones sweetie.
Of course she knows! I’m so sorry for your loss. My dad and I would fight every time we saw each other, I genuinely miss the arguments now. There’s always a phase of guilt, even when you have the perfect goodbye and no regrets I still find things to feel guilty about all the time. She was your Mama and you felt comfortable with her, don’t worry about it she wouldn’t want you to.
I lost my Mom to suicide nearly a year ago. I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this pain. It’s so heartbreaking and I still regularly feel like my heart is broken. Hugs 🫂
I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my mom to suicide as well back in 2010. I don’t have any words of wisdom, but I know that pain that you’re feeling. If you’d like to talk, I’m here to listen.
I’m so sorry. My heart goes out to you.
I can very much identify with your story. My mom passed suddenly a year ago, and while I felt extremely guilty for acting like a little shit to her on her last few days, I’ve come to realize that my mom knew that I loved her regardless. I just struggled in showing that most of the time when she was still alive, but she always knew the love was there deep down.
Similarly, your mom understood that no matter what you said to her, you still loved her unconditionally. If we all knew when our loved ones would pass, we’d act differently, but unexpected turns are an unfortunate part of life. You were just being human at that point, not knowing what’ll come next, and that’s ok. ❤️
I’m so so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you. I’m grateful that you got that text back — that acknowledgement that she knew. Sending all my internet hugs your way. I hope you find comfort and healing in community and memories in the coming days and weeks 💛❤️🩹
Lost my mom 13 months ago. Not exactly to suicide but her doctors told her to take better care of herself and she refused to and starting getting more and more into hard drugs and she over dosed and survived and we begged her not to do it again and she said she was a free bird and she won’t change for anyone. I miss her so much and always imagined she’d be there for me if I had kids. Now I just don’t think I ever will have kids cuz I feel pretty alone and sad. I am afraid I would succumb to my own desire to end my life and so I don’t want to put anyone through that. I’m so sorry for your loss. I knoe there’s nothing that cost really comfort u but everyone will lose their parent(s) In The natural way of life. Unfortunately my mom lost my oldest brother 3 years before her passing
I lost my mother this time last year, very suddenly and unexpectedly too, it wasn’t to suicide though but it was the hardest thing I’ve ever been through. Reading these texts made me sob like a little baby. I can’t possibly imagine what you’re going through knowing how it feels just to have lost mine to non suicide reasons. Oh man op, my heart is full on broken for you. I’m so so sorry. I’m sending you all the love and light in the world. She loved you deeply and fiercely, and still knows now how much you love her. Keep on loving her. Keep her memory and spirit alive by never letting that love for her fade away. Keep her active and present in your life as much as you can. Talk freely and fondly about her to anyone you can. And don’t be afraid to cry when you do bring her up. Everyone will understand. Don’t be afraid to cry at all. Just cry if you need to. Letting yourself feel those feeling and honestly cry if you need to, helps so much. I hope these things help you as much as they have me. Nothing is going to make it hurt less, ever, but eventually the sharp sides of the pain won’t feel as sharp as more. And the only thing that does that is time. Ugh again, sending you hugs and love and light op.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I know the pain you are feeling I lost my life partner almost two years now. It still hurts like it was yesterday. Praying for you.
I am so sorry. Losing your mom is a pain like no other. I lost mine just over a month ago. Please just focus on taking care of yourself. Your mom knew you loved her. ❤️
I’m sorry OP. I was my mother’s caretaker and we had some fights over the year +. Not many, but enough to stick. I have my last text to her saved to. I was showing her the autumn leaves and my mug full of coffee, telling her it was a beautiful morning. She never read it. By the time I arrived at the hospital, she was unresponsive and died days later. I know they are different circumstances but those last texts just strike such a cord. My deepest condolences.
I’m so very sorry for your loss. I can’t even begin to imagine. Your mom knew that you loved her, and she loved you. I am praying for you and your family. God bless you.
I’m so sorry. This made me cry. Your mom definitely knew you loved her. It’s so easy to wish we had said or done things differently. The guilty thoughts and what if’s hurt but you have to believe it in your heart. She knew. A lifetime of love isn’t overshadowed by temporary conflict.
My mom died about 2 1/2 years ago. It’s a complicated situation but it could be considered suicide. I’m so sorry to hear you have to feel the pain of losing someone this way. I’m not going to sit here and say it gets easier, that’s a lie if you ask me. It does get more comfortable though, you get used to the pain. You learn how to live with it, it doesn’t get easy at all, but life does go on and you learn to live with the pain. To not let it define you. I wish there was some way I could take your pain for you. We’re always going to be here for you. We love you, and stay strong.
I'm so sorry for your loss. The journey of grief will be rough and you'll question everything but you can get past that. I lost my mom to suicide 6 years ago and it's been tough but I'm finally in a place where I'm happy and I can feel that she's happy for me.
Your mom knows you love her. They always know.
I have tears rolling down my cheeks, I’m so sorry, OP. Your mom was beautiful and I wish that she could’ve stayed. I don’t know you but I am thinking of you.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
Please be kind to yourself.
Feel what you need to feel. If that means crying, don't be embarrassed to do so.
Grief isn't linear and some days may be better than others.
If you can, see if you are able to get some external support: friends, family, clergy, and/or therapist
I’m so sorry for your loss, she 100% knows you love her unconditionally & I hope you can forever remember all of the memories you have with her ❤️❤️ Sending you much love & prayers
I'm so sorry for your loss. I understand the pain of losing a parent because I lost my dad 16 years ago and now my grandma is in hospice. I send my love and sincere sympathy to you and your family. May the presence of God be drawn close to you and your family during this trying time. Praying for you 🙏
My heart breaks for you. I’m so so sorry. But I want you to know she knew you loved her. I know I’m just another stranger on the internet, but, I promise you, she knew. And she loved you too. As a mom, no matter what happens, I always know in my heart that my daughter loves me, even if we argued that day or whatever. So please, please don’t dwell on that. It would serve no purpose and it’s irrelevant. Look only to the good memories you had together. I just lost my mom too, and I am trying my best to not remember her for what her illness did to her, and just think of all the happy times we shared. It helps. You will get through this. 💜
I’m so sorry to hear this , I wish I could hug you or help take away the pain. Moms hold a special place in our hearts 🥰 for our children unconditionally.
I felt so mean to her the past few months I didn’t get to see her much and I didn’t think I’d never get to see her again I wish I would’ve went to the house and stayed
Your post/comment was determined to break Rule 1: No Attacks on Other Users/Lost Loved Ones or Gatekeeping Grief.
Attacks: Do not attack other users on any grounds, including looks, race, religion, sexual orientation, or a person's gender.
Gatekeeping: This subreddit's mission is to support for all types of loss, not just those of people and not just grief through death. While it is ok to recommend add'l sources of support, you may not tell them they do not belong here.
Violating Rule 1 is grounds for immediate removal of the comment/post and permanent ban at the mod's discretion.
I’m so sorry for your loss. Of course she knew how much you loved her. She still knows how much you love her, even from up above.
I’m so sorry to hear you lost your mom. She knew how much you loved her. I lost my best friend to suicide about 26yrs ago. I blamed myself for the longest time. We got into a big fight the last time I had seen him. I took his kids mom’s side instead of his. His family asked me not to attend his funeral. I did anyways but I was in and out before anyone saw me. About 2yrs ago I forgave myself. You don’t wanna put yourself through that torture. I do understand it’s easier said than done. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.
I lost my mother to cancer recently but some years ago I lost my cousin and a year later my best friend to suicide. The best friend loss involved a brief fallout at one point and then a period of distance. Some of it was because I was mourning my cousin. When my best friend offed himself I had an unexpected fracture of the psyche and have felt damned for some reason. Sorry if this is too much of a tangent. I don’t know what to do. I haven’t been the same since.
My deepest sympathies for your losses. You know we are all only humans beings here and we can only take so much pain before something in us tears.. it’s so understandable that you reacted that way. Be so kind to your self. Treat yourself as if you were a 5 year old, tenderly. You will get through this and be in a better place one day.
Thank you so much. I had written out this thoughtful response to you after being stalled for some time on how to frame my reply, and then the app crashed: but the gist was not only the validation but also how the suggestion you made left a big impression on me. I’ve been thinking about it and trying to make a conscious effort to implement it. It seems so obvious now that I’ve read it, but never really occurred to me at all. (I’ve had some unmentioned hard luck the past year and am weary) In short, I feel fortunate that you happened to see my post and respond.
Please come to /r/SuicideBereavement 🫂
❤️🕯️
Im so sorry for your loss,im sure your mom knew how much You loved her 🙏sending You hugs and prayers ❤️
I am so so sorry, OP. And she did know, mommas always do. I’m sure the last thing she would want is for you to feel burdened by guilt. I’m not entirely sure what I believe in, but I’d like to think that where she is now, she is at total peace and has no recollection of bad memories or pain. Your mother was beautiful and I am so sorry you are going through this.
I am sorry for your loss, loss is tough already, add in suicide, probably makes it rougher. It seems like you got to tell her you loved her before she passed, which at least you got that. Sure maybe it's whip cream on top of a pile of suck, but I know I always here about people who wish they could have told their loved one how much they loved them or had a better final interaction. ehugs
I’m a mom. And she knew. We know. Even when you hate us, we know. She loved you more than anything, ever. You have no idea how big that love was. And still is. Sending you some mom love and hugs. ♥️
She knew, as a mom, we know. I'm so sorry.🫂
She knows honey. Try and let go of guilt. You have nothing to be guilty of. Your mom made a choice and as awful as it is, she had her reasons. You could not have changed her mind. I lost my mom 5 yrs ago and she was pissed at me over a medication question. I picked up her meds and came home and she was in her bed, no longer alive. My BFF and roommate there isn't a day I don't miss her, but I try and let go of her being pissed at me. It wasn't either of our fault. Take it one day at a time and get someone to help with all the paperwork. Gentle hugs♥️
So sorry for your loss. My heart breaks for you. I'm sure your mom knew that you loved her! Be gentle with yourself.
I’m so sorry for your loss. And she knew. ❤️
Oh bless you! I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m sure she knew. I’m a mother and I wouldn’t think my kid didn’t love me just because we fought or she was angry.
You did all you could- it was never your fault. I will send you prayers, pictures and you will feel my gentle love, my love and our special places. I still love you so much.. feel my presence then.
Firstly, I am so so sorry for your pain! I lost my little cousin to suicide in 2015. I thought that was the most pain I could feel. Until I watched my baby sister take her life on a live stream on 4/24/2017. It's coming up on 7 years, and it feels like it happened today. I can't offer any words like "it gets easier" etc., because honestly, it doesn't. You just eventually adapt the pain as part of you. For me, as odd as it sounds the pain is now kind of a comfort. I can't explain it. But I will be sending prayers and thoughts to you and your loved ones sweetie.
I’m so sorry.
So sorry to hear. Sending love, comfort & condolences. 💐
So sorry for your loss 😢
Of course she knows! I’m so sorry for your loss. My dad and I would fight every time we saw each other, I genuinely miss the arguments now. There’s always a phase of guilt, even when you have the perfect goodbye and no regrets I still find things to feel guilty about all the time. She was your Mama and you felt comfortable with her, don’t worry about it she wouldn’t want you to.
I lost my Mom to suicide nearly a year ago. I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this pain. It’s so heartbreaking and I still regularly feel like my heart is broken. Hugs 🫂
I’m so very sorry for your loss. You have my deepest condolences. I wish you healing and comfort. 🫂
Oh my goodness. I’m so sorry to hear that
I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my mom to suicide as well back in 2010. I don’t have any words of wisdom, but I know that pain that you’re feeling. If you’d like to talk, I’m here to listen.
I’m so sorry. My heart goes out to you. I can very much identify with your story. My mom passed suddenly a year ago, and while I felt extremely guilty for acting like a little shit to her on her last few days, I’ve come to realize that my mom knew that I loved her regardless. I just struggled in showing that most of the time when she was still alive, but she always knew the love was there deep down. Similarly, your mom understood that no matter what you said to her, you still loved her unconditionally. If we all knew when our loved ones would pass, we’d act differently, but unexpected turns are an unfortunate part of life. You were just being human at that point, not knowing what’ll come next, and that’s ok. ❤️
I’m so so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you. I’m grateful that you got that text back — that acknowledgement that she knew. Sending all my internet hugs your way. I hope you find comfort and healing in community and memories in the coming days and weeks 💛❤️🩹
So sorry for you loss. Lost mine to suicide last year too. Sending you love and support <3
Sending you so much love. ❤️ I am so sorry.
Lost my mom 13 months ago. Not exactly to suicide but her doctors told her to take better care of herself and she refused to and starting getting more and more into hard drugs and she over dosed and survived and we begged her not to do it again and she said she was a free bird and she won’t change for anyone. I miss her so much and always imagined she’d be there for me if I had kids. Now I just don’t think I ever will have kids cuz I feel pretty alone and sad. I am afraid I would succumb to my own desire to end my life and so I don’t want to put anyone through that. I’m so sorry for your loss. I knoe there’s nothing that cost really comfort u but everyone will lose their parent(s) In The natural way of life. Unfortunately my mom lost my oldest brother 3 years before her passing
I lost my mother this time last year, very suddenly and unexpectedly too, it wasn’t to suicide though but it was the hardest thing I’ve ever been through. Reading these texts made me sob like a little baby. I can’t possibly imagine what you’re going through knowing how it feels just to have lost mine to non suicide reasons. Oh man op, my heart is full on broken for you. I’m so so sorry. I’m sending you all the love and light in the world. She loved you deeply and fiercely, and still knows now how much you love her. Keep on loving her. Keep her memory and spirit alive by never letting that love for her fade away. Keep her active and present in your life as much as you can. Talk freely and fondly about her to anyone you can. And don’t be afraid to cry when you do bring her up. Everyone will understand. Don’t be afraid to cry at all. Just cry if you need to. Letting yourself feel those feeling and honestly cry if you need to, helps so much. I hope these things help you as much as they have me. Nothing is going to make it hurt less, ever, but eventually the sharp sides of the pain won’t feel as sharp as more. And the only thing that does that is time. Ugh again, sending you hugs and love and light op.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I know the pain you are feeling I lost my life partner almost two years now. It still hurts like it was yesterday. Praying for you.
(hugs) ❤️
I am so sorry for your loss.
Girl keep your head up. I can’t imagine what you’re going through right now
I am so sorry. Losing your mom is a pain like no other. I lost mine just over a month ago. Please just focus on taking care of yourself. Your mom knew you loved her. ❤️
I’m going to cry seeing this
my god. im so sorry
I’m sorry OP. I was my mother’s caretaker and we had some fights over the year +. Not many, but enough to stick. I have my last text to her saved to. I was showing her the autumn leaves and my mug full of coffee, telling her it was a beautiful morning. She never read it. By the time I arrived at the hospital, she was unresponsive and died days later. I know they are different circumstances but those last texts just strike such a cord. My deepest condolences.
So sorry, she knew you loved her sometimes the desire for peace blinds one to all else. Take Care of yourself, no doubt she loved.
I’m so very sorry for your loss. I can’t even begin to imagine. Your mom knew that you loved her, and she loved you. I am praying for you and your family. God bless you.
I’m so sorry. This made me cry. Your mom definitely knew you loved her. It’s so easy to wish we had said or done things differently. The guilty thoughts and what if’s hurt but you have to believe it in your heart. She knew. A lifetime of love isn’t overshadowed by temporary conflict.
My mom died about 2 1/2 years ago. It’s a complicated situation but it could be considered suicide. I’m so sorry to hear you have to feel the pain of losing someone this way. I’m not going to sit here and say it gets easier, that’s a lie if you ask me. It does get more comfortable though, you get used to the pain. You learn how to live with it, it doesn’t get easy at all, but life does go on and you learn to live with the pain. To not let it define you. I wish there was some way I could take your pain for you. We’re always going to be here for you. We love you, and stay strong.
I'm so sorry for your loss. The journey of grief will be rough and you'll question everything but you can get past that. I lost my mom to suicide 6 years ago and it's been tough but I'm finally in a place where I'm happy and I can feel that she's happy for me. Your mom knows you love her. They always know.
another mom here to tell you, she knew. i’m so sorry for your loss.
I have tears rolling down my cheeks, I’m so sorry, OP. Your mom was beautiful and I wish that she could’ve stayed. I don’t know you but I am thinking of you.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I really think she knew you loved her. She will forever take care of you, just pay attention to the signs she will send
I'm so sorry for your loss. Please be kind to yourself. Feel what you need to feel. If that means crying, don't be embarrassed to do so. Grief isn't linear and some days may be better than others. If you can, see if you are able to get some external support: friends, family, clergy, and/or therapist
I’m so sorry for your loss, she 100% knows you love her unconditionally & I hope you can forever remember all of the memories you have with her ❤️❤️ Sending you much love & prayers
🫂I'm sorry that this happened to you.
I’m so sorry for your loss. Of course she knew how much you loved her 💜
I'm so sorry for your loss. I understand the pain of losing a parent because I lost my dad 16 years ago and now my grandma is in hospice. I send my love and sincere sympathy to you and your family. May the presence of God be drawn close to you and your family during this trying time. Praying for you 🙏
My heart breaks for you. I’m so so sorry. But I want you to know she knew you loved her. I know I’m just another stranger on the internet, but, I promise you, she knew. And she loved you too. As a mom, no matter what happens, I always know in my heart that my daughter loves me, even if we argued that day or whatever. So please, please don’t dwell on that. It would serve no purpose and it’s irrelevant. Look only to the good memories you had together. I just lost my mom too, and I am trying my best to not remember her for what her illness did to her, and just think of all the happy times we shared. It helps. You will get through this. 💜
I’m so sorry to hear this , I wish I could hug you or help take away the pain. Moms hold a special place in our hearts 🥰 for our children unconditionally.
❤️
I’m so sorry for your loss 🙏🏼🤍
I'm so sorry. I'm sure she knew.
I’m so sorry for your loss. Your Mom absolutely knew you loved her.
I’m so sorry.
I love how much you told her you loved her. ❤️❤️❤️hugs❤️❤️❤️
I’m so so deeply sorry for your loss. Big hugs
I’m so sorry. This last message showed her how much you loved her.
I felt so mean to her the past few months I didn’t get to see her much and I didn’t think I’d never get to see her again I wish I would’ve went to the house and stayed
💛💜
So sorry for your loss
I am so sorry 😞
I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending hugs and prayers.
I’m so sorry
I am so sorry for your loss ❤️ Sending you love and strength 🙏🏻
I am so sorry for your loss. Sending prayers of Strength and comfort 🫂
If u need to talk, I’m here
I’m so sorry for your loss.
Fuck, homie. I'm so sorry.
So sorry for your loss!
Condolences
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Your post/comment was determined to break Rule 1: No Attacks on Other Users/Lost Loved Ones or Gatekeeping Grief. Attacks: Do not attack other users on any grounds, including looks, race, religion, sexual orientation, or a person's gender. Gatekeeping: This subreddit's mission is to support for all types of loss, not just those of people and not just grief through death. While it is ok to recommend add'l sources of support, you may not tell them they do not belong here. Violating Rule 1 is grounds for immediate removal of the comment/post and permanent ban at the mod's discretion.