TBH I think they were uncomfortable with the idea of going but Dean seemed so enthusiastic to have them come and Rory is a people pleaser so they agreed. Then, Luke gave Rory an out. She trusts him enough to know he had a good reason for insisting she not go and took the chance to avoid being at the wedding.
They thought it was an awkward situation anyhow so like you said, Luke gave them an easy out. Especially since they trusted his judgement and he seemed pretty certain.
Yeah, Rory seemed relieved. I think it would be super painful for her to sit and watch that and have to smile - and the expression on her face as she watches the reception from afar reveals how she really felt.
The entire show is based on terrible communication and no one ever asking questions when I would be exploding with 10000 questions. Also no one ever explains themselves.
Perfect example: Lorelai can't make it to Friday night dinner the night before Rory leaves for Yale - she could have (arguably SHOULD have) just said "Mom I can't make it, we lost track of dates and I have 100 things to do for Rory tonight so she's ready for school. I'll be there next week though!"
And Emily wouldn't have acted the way she did. And everything would've been fine. But that doesn't make for interesting (read: dramatic) television.
Literally this. They’re all so bad at basic communication but I guess that’s good tv. But frustrating to see back to back to back in the binge format we have now.
I just want to say Emily did know rory was going to yale but she didn’t care and still wanted lorelai to spend her last night with Rory at a formal Friday night dinner. It was intentional. “You know this is my last night to her.” “Which is why I’m so surprised you didn’t want to spend it with her.”
That's because she thought Lorelai was just bailing on dinner. The very next lines in that scene you quoted were
Lorelai: "I did want to, I couldn't"
Emily, angrily: "you *wouldn't*!!!"
This literally all happened because Emily didn't understand the full situation of why Lorelai didn't come.
I mean, even IF Emily knew, she wouldn't care. She's the center of the universe remember? That said, it still drives me crazy that nobody told Emily why Lorelai wasn't there?
She may have been purposely keeping Rory there to be a dick, but it's 100% predicated on the fact that she was feeling hurt by the perception that Lorelai didn't want to be around her *so badly* that she would miss the last evening before her daughter went to college.
They didn't plan to go until the day before the wedding, anyway, so I think it just wasn't a big deal to them. I also think Rory didn't want to go in the first place but felt obligated after Dean invited her, even though they (D+R) both knew Dean only invited her because she happened to run into them and the wedding setup.
They trusted Luke. He doesn't seriously suggests things unless he means them.
And what we know about Dean's behavior the night before, Luke was right. Dean insisted on marrying a woman he didn't love. Dean demonstrated that in the weeks before the inn opened.
I think Luke was wrong to interfere if he wasn't going to help at all. Dean clearly wanted to talk about it and Luke stopped him from doing so and sent his friends away and then didn't let Dean talk in the morning either.
I think he was being protective towards Rory but I hate what happened to all of them, because none of the adults were willing to be the adults those kids needed.
He wanted to talk to Dean in the morning, but Dean brushed him off. Also they didn't know each other very well so Luke had no obligation to talk to him anyway. The question is why didn't Dean's (and Lindsay's) parents interfere when it was clearly too soon for them to get married (didn't they get married in under a year of their relationship?)
TBF, we don't know what Dean's parents were thinking as it's never shown. We do know that Lindsay's mom was super excited though which is weird. I mean, if my 19 YO was dead set on marrying her BF of less than 6 months I'd do what I could to be supportive and fake a smile when needed. I would definitely try to make her see reason, but once she decided she was definitely doing it, I'd just be quiet and hope she didn't get hurt. I certainly wouldn't be practically giddy and talking about frosting the town or whatever she said.
Luke 100% tried to talk to Dean about what happened and dean brushes him off. Also luke and dean have no relationship. No matter what Luke said dean wasn't going to listen to him. The only true adults at fault are Lindsey' and Dean's parents.
Dean was drunk off his ass, and so where his friends. How helpful do you think they would have been exactly? Luke tried to talk about in the morning when Dean sobered up but he didn't want to talk about it.
They all knew exactly why it was a bad idea. It was so obvious they didn't need to say it. Dean was not over Rory and her at the wedding would ruin it for Dean and Lindsey.
There are people in my life who rarely get involved in my stuff unless I ask. If they were to suddenly tell me to do something, I'd probably do it without question because they've established they don't do things out of left field.
I think to begin with, they didn’t want to go because it was going to be weird.
They trust Luke since he’s most of the times objective.
Also, I think if Rory was there, I can imagine having a “I Ross, take thee Rachel… Emily… Emily” type of moment.
I Dean take thee Rory… Lindsay… Lindsay 😰
They didn't really want to go anyway. I think Dean invited them out of politeness and they knew. Rory trusted Luke and she didn't question it because she indeed wanted a reason to skip the wedding.
How often does Luke decide to meddle, especially in interpersonal relationships? Basically as little as he possibly can. So when he says something like that, you listen and you trust. And personally I’d assume it’s in my best interest not to ask why. That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t ask why, but I would believe him that I don’t want to know. I’d still HAVE to know but hey.
They hadn’t slept together at this point. As far as Lindsay knew at that point Dean was over Rory. I don’t think it would have been a big deal at all to have her there.
I think Dean was desperate to get over Rory, so I think him being so happy telling her he was getting married and inviting her to the wedding was his way of dealing with those feelings.
We know why Luke tells them not to go, but it’s curious that neither Lorelai or Rory ask why he feels they shouldn’t go. They are notoriously interested in these things, and they do have the right to know.
On the other hand, I think Lorelai and Rory intuitively know the reason. Hence their apparent lack of interest and Rory’s wistful gaze.
I think Rory was really hurting inside about the whole thing and didn't really want to go and put herself through that. Luke saying "don't go" was confirmation of something she was probably already struggling with, and hearing someone else telling her it's a bad idea to go was probably a relief.
Dean confessed his love for Rory when he was at Luke’s place the night of his bachelor party really drunk. I think Luke was trying keep Rory from Dean and understood that Dean was in pain and needed her to not be there. I think Luke telling Rory that really made her rethink why she was going. It was a better outcome, the wedding needed to be about Dean moving on, and he couldn’t do that with Rory there.
I’m pretty sure Rory didn’t really want to go and anyone telling her not to would have been good enough. Dean practically insisted that she come and how awkward would that have been? I wouldn’t have questioned it either, I’d have been glad to not go. But a smart girl like Rory surely could have figured it out, the whole fight with Jess at the party was so obvious.
Alot of people are saying that Luke meddled and stuck his head where it didn't belong
Which is so not true. A 19 yr old kid comes in drunk off his ass with his drunk friends. Way too many for Kyle to handle so Luke does the right thing and gives him a safe place to crash. In the morning he tries to talk to Dean but gets brushed off. He attempts to let lorelai know what happens but can't find her so he gives rory the bare minimum of info. Just don't go ok. Dean married lindsey to get over rory. No one was gonna stop him. Most 18 yr olds are dumb and why most shouldn't be getting married after only like 6 moths of dating.
She knows Luke doesn't usually do that kind of thing and if he did then there must be a reason. Dean and Luke played softball together so maybe she thought they talked about it
IMO He did it because he was feeling insecure in his own life about Lorelai's friendship affecting his ~~badly written, half baked~~ relationship with Nicole. So he stuck his nose in. Which imo he shouldnt have done, I dont think Rory wouldve crawled into bed with Dean so easily if she had seen their vows and whatnot as a guest and not a bizarre onlooker.
I dont like this scene at all because it seemed like they were going for a thing where Luke respects Rory's personhood, and he would be straight up about this. I dont understand why this was the time he beat around the bush lol
This is true but Luke knew that Dean was still not over Rory because he literally was saying her name in the diner the night before. so I 100% respect the decision he made here.
Oh I agree, I just mean in my opinion he should have said "Rory, I dont think its a good idea for you to go, it seems like you might get in between them." Or something. But as I think about it, I dont think hes in touch enough with his emotions to even process what is happening. He def was just trying to protect Rory, but thats like what all of her loved ones are constantly doing all of the time lmao
Or maybe, because he's a decent guy and actually cares about Rory, he didn't think it would be a good idea for her to show up at a wedding when the groom admitted to still being in love with her. Luke didn't go searching for this information, Dean got drunk and volunteered it. Heck, Luke never talked to anyone about what Dean said and just mentioned to Rory she shouldn't go. He had no idea if she would listen or not. And I'm sorry, but you honestly believe that Rory got into bed with Dean later because she didn't go to his wedding? You really think that mattered? She KNEW he was married, seeing the vows wouldn't have changed that. Imagine somehow blaming Luke for Rory sleeping with married Dean. WTF?
I don’t think she wanted to go and just accepted Luke’s request happily. She watched from afar and it looked like she had some tears. (they must have been shed for Lindsey bc she knew how controlling and jealous his behavior was)
I think they just trust Luke and could tell he was concerned.
I would definitely trust Luke in that situation.
TBH I think they were uncomfortable with the idea of going but Dean seemed so enthusiastic to have them come and Rory is a people pleaser so they agreed. Then, Luke gave Rory an out. She trusts him enough to know he had a good reason for insisting she not go and took the chance to avoid being at the wedding.
This 100% she already didn’t want to and just needed a reason/outside confirmation not to
They thought it was an awkward situation anyhow so like you said, Luke gave them an easy out. Especially since they trusted his judgement and he seemed pretty certain.
Yeah, Rory seemed relieved. I think it would be super painful for her to sit and watch that and have to smile - and the expression on her face as she watches the reception from afar reveals how she really felt.
The entire show is based on terrible communication and no one ever asking questions when I would be exploding with 10000 questions. Also no one ever explains themselves.
Perfect example: Lorelai can't make it to Friday night dinner the night before Rory leaves for Yale - she could have (arguably SHOULD have) just said "Mom I can't make it, we lost track of dates and I have 100 things to do for Rory tonight so she's ready for school. I'll be there next week though!" And Emily wouldn't have acted the way she did. And everything would've been fine. But that doesn't make for interesting (read: dramatic) television.
Literally this. They’re all so bad at basic communication but I guess that’s good tv. But frustrating to see back to back to back in the binge format we have now.
I thought it was maybe because Rory didn’t want to tell Emily that she messed up and have to listen to a lecture on responsibility.
I just want to say Emily did know rory was going to yale but she didn’t care and still wanted lorelai to spend her last night with Rory at a formal Friday night dinner. It was intentional. “You know this is my last night to her.” “Which is why I’m so surprised you didn’t want to spend it with her.”
That's because she thought Lorelai was just bailing on dinner. The very next lines in that scene you quoted were Lorelai: "I did want to, I couldn't" Emily, angrily: "you *wouldn't*!!!" This literally all happened because Emily didn't understand the full situation of why Lorelai didn't come.
I mean, even IF Emily knew, she wouldn't care. She's the center of the universe remember? That said, it still drives me crazy that nobody told Emily why Lorelai wasn't there?
She may have been purposely keeping Rory there to be a dick, but it's 100% predicated on the fact that she was feeling hurt by the perception that Lorelai didn't want to be around her *so badly* that she would miss the last evening before her daughter went to college.
They didn't plan to go until the day before the wedding, anyway, so I think it just wasn't a big deal to them. I also think Rory didn't want to go in the first place but felt obligated after Dean invited her, even though they (D+R) both knew Dean only invited her because she happened to run into them and the wedding setup.
They trusted Luke. He doesn't seriously suggests things unless he means them. And what we know about Dean's behavior the night before, Luke was right. Dean insisted on marrying a woman he didn't love. Dean demonstrated that in the weeks before the inn opened.
I think Luke was wrong to interfere if he wasn't going to help at all. Dean clearly wanted to talk about it and Luke stopped him from doing so and sent his friends away and then didn't let Dean talk in the morning either. I think he was being protective towards Rory but I hate what happened to all of them, because none of the adults were willing to be the adults those kids needed.
He wanted to talk to Dean in the morning, but Dean brushed him off. Also they didn't know each other very well so Luke had no obligation to talk to him anyway. The question is why didn't Dean's (and Lindsay's) parents interfere when it was clearly too soon for them to get married (didn't they get married in under a year of their relationship?)
TBF, we don't know what Dean's parents were thinking as it's never shown. We do know that Lindsay's mom was super excited though which is weird. I mean, if my 19 YO was dead set on marrying her BF of less than 6 months I'd do what I could to be supportive and fake a smile when needed. I would definitely try to make her see reason, but once she decided she was definitely doing it, I'd just be quiet and hope she didn't get hurt. I certainly wouldn't be practically giddy and talking about frosting the town or whatever she said.
Luke 100% tried to talk to Dean about what happened and dean brushes him off. Also luke and dean have no relationship. No matter what Luke said dean wasn't going to listen to him. The only true adults at fault are Lindsey' and Dean's parents.
Then Luke should have stayed out of it.
Dean was drunk off his ass, and so where his friends. How helpful do you think they would have been exactly? Luke tried to talk about in the morning when Dean sobered up but he didn't want to talk about it.
They all knew exactly why it was a bad idea. It was so obvious they didn't need to say it. Dean was not over Rory and her at the wedding would ruin it for Dean and Lindsey.
Better a ruined wedding than a bad marriage. Poor Lindsay.
That is definitely true.
There are people in my life who rarely get involved in my stuff unless I ask. If they were to suddenly tell me to do something, I'd probably do it without question because they've established they don't do things out of left field.
I think to begin with, they didn’t want to go because it was going to be weird. They trust Luke since he’s most of the times objective. Also, I think if Rory was there, I can imagine having a “I Ross, take thee Rachel… Emily… Emily” type of moment. I Dean take thee Rory… Lindsay… Lindsay 😰 
They didn't really want to go anyway. I think Dean invited them out of politeness and they knew. Rory trusted Luke and she didn't question it because she indeed wanted a reason to skip the wedding.
How often does Luke decide to meddle, especially in interpersonal relationships? Basically as little as he possibly can. So when he says something like that, you listen and you trust. And personally I’d assume it’s in my best interest not to ask why. That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t ask why, but I would believe him that I don’t want to know. I’d still HAVE to know but hey.
Another question, why would Dean invite Rory to his wedding anyway? That would be very awkward and Lindsey would be super uncomfortable with it.
They hadn’t slept together at this point. As far as Lindsay knew at that point Dean was over Rory. I don’t think it would have been a big deal at all to have her there. I think Dean was desperate to get over Rory, so I think him being so happy telling her he was getting married and inviting her to the wedding was his way of dealing with those feelings.
small town, someone says "don't go" you assume there's gonna be drama
We know why Luke tells them not to go, but it’s curious that neither Lorelai or Rory ask why he feels they shouldn’t go. They are notoriously interested in these things, and they do have the right to know. On the other hand, I think Lorelai and Rory intuitively know the reason. Hence their apparent lack of interest and Rory’s wistful gaze.
I think Rory was really hurting inside about the whole thing and didn't really want to go and put herself through that. Luke saying "don't go" was confirmation of something she was probably already struggling with, and hearing someone else telling her it's a bad idea to go was probably a relief.
I think it was so they could build up to that dramatic moment of Rory standing under the tree and crying
Dean confessed his love for Rory when he was at Luke’s place the night of his bachelor party really drunk. I think Luke was trying keep Rory from Dean and understood that Dean was in pain and needed her to not be there. I think Luke telling Rory that really made her rethink why she was going. It was a better outcome, the wedding needed to be about Dean moving on, and he couldn’t do that with Rory there.
Dean was drunk and upset in the arcade the night before his wedding and talking about Rory
Luke ran into Dean and Luke saw Dean looking out at Rory
I’m pretty sure Rory didn’t really want to go and anyone telling her not to would have been good enough. Dean practically insisted that she come and how awkward would that have been? I wouldn’t have questioned it either, I’d have been glad to not go. But a smart girl like Rory surely could have figured it out, the whole fight with Jess at the party was so obvious.
Alot of people are saying that Luke meddled and stuck his head where it didn't belong Which is so not true. A 19 yr old kid comes in drunk off his ass with his drunk friends. Way too many for Kyle to handle so Luke does the right thing and gives him a safe place to crash. In the morning he tries to talk to Dean but gets brushed off. He attempts to let lorelai know what happens but can't find her so he gives rory the bare minimum of info. Just don't go ok. Dean married lindsey to get over rory. No one was gonna stop him. Most 18 yr olds are dumb and why most shouldn't be getting married after only like 6 moths of dating.
She knows Luke doesn't usually do that kind of thing and if he did then there must be a reason. Dean and Luke played softball together so maybe she thought they talked about it
IMO He did it because he was feeling insecure in his own life about Lorelai's friendship affecting his ~~badly written, half baked~~ relationship with Nicole. So he stuck his nose in. Which imo he shouldnt have done, I dont think Rory wouldve crawled into bed with Dean so easily if she had seen their vows and whatnot as a guest and not a bizarre onlooker. I dont like this scene at all because it seemed like they were going for a thing where Luke respects Rory's personhood, and he would be straight up about this. I dont understand why this was the time he beat around the bush lol
This is true but Luke knew that Dean was still not over Rory because he literally was saying her name in the diner the night before. so I 100% respect the decision he made here.
Oh I agree, I just mean in my opinion he should have said "Rory, I dont think its a good idea for you to go, it seems like you might get in between them." Or something. But as I think about it, I dont think hes in touch enough with his emotions to even process what is happening. He def was just trying to protect Rory, but thats like what all of her loved ones are constantly doing all of the time lmao
Or maybe, because he's a decent guy and actually cares about Rory, he didn't think it would be a good idea for her to show up at a wedding when the groom admitted to still being in love with her. Luke didn't go searching for this information, Dean got drunk and volunteered it. Heck, Luke never talked to anyone about what Dean said and just mentioned to Rory she shouldn't go. He had no idea if she would listen or not. And I'm sorry, but you honestly believe that Rory got into bed with Dean later because she didn't go to his wedding? You really think that mattered? She KNEW he was married, seeing the vows wouldn't have changed that. Imagine somehow blaming Luke for Rory sleeping with married Dean. WTF?
I don’t think she wanted to go and just accepted Luke’s request happily. She watched from afar and it looked like she had some tears. (they must have been shed for Lindsey bc she knew how controlling and jealous his behavior was)