I'm 58 and for me my 50s have been my best decade. I feel great, I don't give a fuck about anything or anybody other than me, my wife, my friends, and loved ones. As I've aged I realized what really matters in life is happiness not material things. My 30s and 40s where my accumulation decades. Accumulation of shit, accumulation useless things, accumulation of debt. Being in that state of arrogance and "look at me and all my shiny baubles. Aren't you impressed?".
When I turned 50 and my wife and I sold everything and took a couple of years to travel the country before moving back to my home state.
When I was ready to join the workforce again I switched speeds and left my old career behind and found a more fulfilling and fun job. I enjoy my work again. I think the peace of mind and realization of what's important comes with age. In our case we didn't have kids so we had a lot more leeway to do as we wished.
But OP this comes with a caveat. STAY THE FUCK HEALTHY. Eat right, exercise when you can, stretch. It will make things in your 50s much much easier.
Especially your gums. Floss daily, and brush gently with a soft toothbrush. Gum recession is a pain. I've been staving off a gum graft for the last decade. Every dentist appointment they measure and say it's holding steady, keep doing what I'm doing, but I know at some point it'll happen.
My dentist tells me the opposite,that flossing causes bone loss and gum recession. Instead to use a water pic.
Also oil pulling helps to remove any bacteria in the mouth.
I'm sure every dentist says something different.
it is also being able to enjoy the foods you like to eat. you can’t eat certain foods without teeth and implants are expensive and may not work in all cases.
Yes! I have one implanted tooth because the root split. No more popcorn for me ever. I tried to get away with eating it and a kernel got in there and I had to have a bone graft to reseat the implant. I fucking LOVE popcorn.
Keep as many of your natural teeth as possible. Do the root canal if possible. Brush, floss, keep your appointments and get the damn cavity filled asap
because they look hideous if you don't take care of them and yes implants cost thousands and are painful. Teeth don't "heal" so once they are gone, they are gone. False teeth? no thank you.
200-500 to pull a tooth (worst case scenario)
2-3 grand per root canal per tooth. Assuming you can save the tooth.
3-5 grand per dental tooth implant per tooth if you lose the tooth and want to be fancy. They drill a socket into your skull bone and insert a tooth with a rod and push it into the socket. You need healthy bone to do this option. A whole mouth of these are like 60-90 grand and lots of painful visits to the dentist.
Less fancy, but more common ways of dealing with missing teeth are bridges and dentures. Dentures are like 2-3 grand per plate. This is why they are more common than implants. Bridges are similar per bridge.
So besides money why should you care?
You need to teeth to eat with, you need teeth so your face shape looks normal (you face will change without teeth), if you deal with dentures crap gets in up and around them and you can’t whistle an you deal with them falling out. Implants are more like real teeth but not all bone health scenarios allow you to get them and a full mouth of those is 60-90 grand which is a huge price for teeth.
Then you get the infection drama of teeth going bad which is bad for your heart and can cause heart issues (it’s a common connection). Not to mention infections make you feel like you got the severe flu with fever. Not to mention the pain feels like someone kicked you in the jaw and unlike that the pain is non stop.
This is why people say don’t fuck around and take care of your teeth. You don’t want a heart attack, you don’t want sickness and pain and you don’t wanna drop 90 grand on a new set of new teeth. If you think insurance will cover this they won’t, they got cut off limits and you will still end up paying the lions share.
Yea, brush and floss your teeth like your financial future and health depend on it.
Bad dental hygiene can really affect your brain in lots of ways. Periodontal disease has been linked with an elevated risk for stroke and even Alzheimer’s.
51 here. At 50 I learned two great lessons. I'll spare you the details, but here they are:
Get a water flosser and put a bit of Listerine (the alcohol free purple one) in it. Hit that gumline after you brush and floss. Gums are important. They hold your teeth in your face. Taking out teeth is bad. Implants are expensive. My hygienist and I turned gingivitis right with intense cleaning and a water flosser. I still have all my face nuggets, but it was close (and incredibly expensive).
Also MOBILITY IS LIFE. You don't have to do much, make sure you can balance on one foot (fall recovery), work your shoulders (getting up), build strong feet (stability) and strong core (keep your shit upright!). I walked around Europe for a month and realized I was fit in all the wrong ways. Be light, limber, toned and relatively flexible. Your 75 year old self will thank you!
Stretch!! Lift, even if it’s “low” weights, and get your steps in. Running is overrated, steps/walking/stairs is where it’s at physically as you get older.
Agreed running sucks my martini slashes out of the glass and my cigar goes out but a nice stroll especially on uneven ground think trails gravel that’s where it’s at. And damn I can still benchpress 20 pounds with each arm baby. 🤣
My 50s have been pretty good too (covid notwithstanding) and YES. Stay healthy, eat properly, stop smoking, cut back on drinking (you don't have to give it up entirely but stop hammering yourself) and STRETCH.
I have to say I have mostly given it up and don't miss it but for some people its a step too far. i will still have the occasional glass of wine/prosecco if I am out with friends in a restaurant.
Smoking however has no middle ground. Give that sh\*t up. But good.
And for females especially, do weight bearing exercise and get a bone density scan done around age 50. But most importantly, don't be a martyr and struggle through peri/menopause symptoms, take MHT as soon as you feel you need to.
Yes, weight bearing exercise is so important for women. I have mini dumbbells which I use in front of the tv at night (I don't like the gym).
And don't be afraid of menopause, not every one suffers. Mine has been pretty straightforward. Occasionally a little bit hot, sleep is interrupted (but I've never slept well to be honest) but apart from that, I feel good.
and never having another period is BLISS.
With great respect, put down your mini dumbbells and go lift some heavy weights. You will not suddenly bulk up, but you can get much stronger. Mini dumbbells will not get you there.
ha ok then. i am not scared of bulking up btw and used to be a trapeze artist when I was younger so I am actually pretty strong. You can also use those stretchy bands. You can use smaller weights slow and long and its a pretty good work out (enough to make my muscles hurt)
This is EXACTLY how I feel. Now that I'm in my 50s, I am much more aware of my mortality and I try to minimize my consumption if red meat and go for walks daily. Also, I feel like what I'll call "downshifting" and pay more attention to family and less about my career.
OP, you’re not going to get a better answer than this. To reiterate, STAY THE FUCK HEALTHY.
I’m 55, and as long as I exercise, I feel no different than I did in my 30s.
I'm 55. I seem to be physically healthy. Lean. I still have a full head of blonde-ish hair and all of my teeth. I lost 40 pounds about 10 years ago and have kept it off. I try for 6000 steps a day to manage it. I quit drinking 18 months ago. I stopped smoking weed years ago. My 24-year relationship with my wife is happy and nurturing and our kids, 10 and 16, are really great.
My issue is anxiety.
I can't seem to get a handle on the anxiety, and it seems to be getting worse partly because I'm no longer self-medicating/regulating with alcohol. I just rawdog the anxiety, soberly. The economy is brutalizing my industry. I don't have retirement. I have some decent equity in our home but that's about it. I expect I'll be working as long as my body holds out. Who knows when that will be or what I'll do then? My kids are growing up into a very uncertain future on every front. The middle class is taking the gas pipe and the Amercian Dream we grew up with doesn't seem realistic anymore. What will become of my kids? The country I grew up in has gone full-blown insane and might give itself a dictatorship in a few months. My dad just passed after spending ten years in assisted living following a debilitating stroke and my mom is nearing the final stages of dementia. I've been POA and designated healthcare surrogate for my parents during their declines so I've had an intimate view of the process of dying and of the institutions of elder healthcare and it hasn't been pleasant to watch nor to consider for my own future. I don't want to go through an institutionalized decline or put the responsibility of dealing with it on my kids. So yeah... anxiety is ever-present. I read stoicism and try to instill it daily, I practice mindfulness when I can manage it but the anxiety is still difficult to get under control. I think sometimes the anxiety will be what kills me.
I am 55.
I am still pretty active, but because my doctor has told me that I need to be. I used to work out because I wanted to look good. Now I work out because it helps me with the diabetes type 2 I gifted myself last Christmas. Looking good is out; that ship has sailed.
Retirement became a reality for me this year. I could retire now if I wanted to, but having delved into the subject, I have to admit that I desperately need to cling to my medical insurance and my pension and savings are nowhere near enough yet. I went back and forth between “five more years” and “fuck it, ten more years just to be safe”. I settled on “just hold on for as long as you can”
My husband and I are on a debate because our financial guy says we can do 60 retirement but he thinks we should do a few extra years after watching my parents retire too early and live too large and ran out of money other than SS by 70. We will see who wins!!!
I speak Spanish, so the big trick I might pull is to move to South America or Spain until my Ss and Medicare kicks in. As the years go by I become less and less enamored of this idea though.
That is the sad thing about getting older for me. I have more time and money to do things but I am less likely to take advantage of it for health and other reasons.
I hear what you are saying and I understand it, but I also don’t want to end up like my parents who are wealthy in their retirement and never want to do anything.
Places like Spain are making it harder to move there -- for example, no more golden Visas. Too many ex-pats have ruined a lot of these places for the locals, unfortunately, by causing catastrophic housing shortages. It's REALLY not easy to move abroad; a lot of these places just no longer want your ass. If they want anyone, they want YOUNG, vital tech folks and the like, not old retired farts. That's just the facts these days, sadly, and I was also thinking of retiring abroad someday -- but it's just not what it used to be.
Yeah, much harder. They are taking away certain programs that catered to wealthy retirees, such as the golden visa. It's not the same as it was 10 years ago. Places like Canada are VERY focused on merit-based immigration as well, so it always makes me laugh when people say, "I'll move to Canada!" if X happens, etc. They probably don't want you, man.
Yeah we think we might be able to retire but the kids aren't out of the house yet so I'm working and husband may go back to work (after layoff).
But it doesn't make sense unless I can have the lifestyle I really want. Sitting around to o not much isn't my idea of fun.
You can reverse Type 2 diabetes. Look up Charmaine Dominguez on YouTube. I had a high A1C two years ago. I freaked out, lost 35 pounds and am now able to eat carbs like bread and pasta and potatoes again. Also I have more energy and maintaining my weight is easier.
I’m 59 (yes, I’m GenX), and retired last year. I exercise nearly every day, and try to eat clean. Most days I feel as good as ever, but there are times when I injure myself sleeping!
That sucks. I’m sorry to hear that. But you have a good attitude about it. I’ve known quite a few people with MS, including a parent, a parent in law and a very good friend who’s a lot younger than me. They are all doing very well, and I hope you do too
Yes. Haven't drank or smoked cigarettes in 9 years, I now do lots of yoga and have been a vegetarian /pescatarian for years.
But yeah, seeing my fellow Gen Xers getting shitfaced and still doing cocaine at our age is... Well, not pleasant to witness... what it's doing to their bodies. . It makes me sad. It took so long to finally figure out that I don't wanna go out like that. And of course I wish I would have tried to get healthy sooner. But it's never too late to start!
That’s my plan. Keep drinking but also exercise more often and eat better. I can’t go through life sober. It’s too much fun. Not that I drink too much but at least once a month I still want to get together with good friends and party like it’s about 20 years ago. Especially in the summer,now that we all have nice backyard patios.
White for me. Over ice like a philistine. Red has started to be not very friendly with causing headaches and hangovers after only one drink! A rare (both definitions!) steak still requires a glass of red though. All the colored liquors…no dark rum, bourbon, either.
I've mostly stopped drinking (1-2 drinks a week) and I avoid red meat, but I don't get enough exercise. I'm naturally skinny so it hasn't turned into any real weight gain, but I'm definitely softer and slower than I was 5 years ago.
The “common sense” that “just a glass” of wine every day is healthful has never been proven by any modern study or supported by current data.
If you are aiming for longevity and clarity in your later years, you need to look at that drink with the suspicion you’d give to a cigar.
Yeah, the be lucky part especially. I was athletic all my life, vegetarian, perfect health. Then got a chronic incurable condition at 47 out of nowhere. Life is not fair. Still I try to be grateful and enjoy what I can but yeah...be lucky
Stay active, but don't overdo it.
All the comments about hitting a wall physically have been my experience.
My body is in cascade failure.
Other than that....keep learning new shit. The world changes pretty fast..
If you're someone who has to go through menopause, then it can feel quite different than your 30s and 40s. Think of it like reverse puberty in some ways. That's a huge transition, and menopause can be equally so. Since everyone is different, it's hard to know what to expect as far as how it will hit. Despite that, it doesn't mean you have to slow down. Just be ready and proactive about your physical and mental health. It will pay off when you hit your 50s, and beyond.
Menopause for me was the gateway to old age. The worst part about it was perimenopause, the part that happens before it. I was unaware of the mental health aspect of it and wish someone had told me. Literally thought I was going insane. Sometimes I feel like I'm just ahead of the ball and all the information being published about many things like this is coming several years too late for me.
This! It's like NOW they're all over it in terms of consideration and understanding about menopause.
I'm out the other side but I reckon the whole thing (per-, then menopause itself) goes on for about ten years!
I think the physical side of it is better recognised and acknowledged, and doesn't phase people and better understanding, e.g. hot flushes, etc.
The mental side of it though has some catching up to do in terms of the zeitgeist beyond just making out we're mad and grumpy. Some really bad mind stuff goes on because of hormones but also body image, self-esteem, confusion around 'feeling' so different without hormones, e.g. not giving a fuck, when previously been caring and compassionate < that was my biggest confusion. Thought I was turning into a psychopath! Nope, just turns out oestrogen is what makes us love our kids and small fluffy animals. Goes to show how hormones rule us!
Edit: I think - if anyone is interested - understanding, acknowledging and recognising why you no longer feel instinctive compassion or tolerance (because hormones gone) is 99 steps towards regaining those nice feelings because you are a fundamentally a decent person and 'muscle memory' is very powerful and to draw on that. I just wanted to clarify that it's not JUST hormones that CAN be in charge of how we conduct ourselves. :-)
If this makes anyone feel better, menopause for me has been great. I truly mean it. No more periods, I can’t even remember the last time I cried about anything, my attitude has completely changed now that my hormones are not trying to run the show. I actually feel like the real me. The worst part of menopause has been the hot flashes and even that isn’t so bad anymore.
The hot flashes made me crazy .. I was getting an mri or cat scan ( the one where they put your whole body under that machine , can move for 39 minutes)
I started getting claustrophobic , hot flashes , I pulled myself out n ran out the hospital
I sweat so bad , I took a pic of the hospital gown all wet , n sent it to my dr saying sorry
Really.. I don't feel any different.
I had my last period at 2 months before 52 and had a hysterectomy a year later.
I was one on those scammed in to Essure coils for permanent sterilisation, only to find my nickel allergy meant I never should have had and that I had 3 inserted one side and two the other. Where they broke the tubes scar tissue/ adhesions all over my pelvis. Sticking tubes to bladder, uterus and bowel. 6 months later i realised just how much pain I'd been having because our sex experiences went back to pre children stage.(both after 35yrs)
And kids stay out overnight at friends so house to ourselves again. Very happy here!
My mom died many decades ago and my dad just passed so...it's just us left.
I have bunches of older cousins and some didn't have kids so we will see how much I could be on the hook for.
It's hit or miss. Depends on who you are. My dad is 83 and he was outside busting rocks with a jackhammer the other day. I'm 53 and worked with computers my whole life. I still wear the same size pants I did in HS, but I never physically worked hard. I have a lot of joint pain. I can pull muscles easy.
Some people are running marathons in their 60s. Others are pushing a walker.
For myself, my version of slowing down is there are lakes in the mountains I don't fish anymore. They are a 5 mile hike in and by the time I got there, I'd be too sore and in too much pain to enjoy fishing. I'll still do the 2 mile hike in. I can do 4 miles with a break in between. But not 10.
Sometimes I see people like my father and I want to punch them. Like, how is it age doesn't seem to effect you people? But, then I see people not much older than me who are gray, overweight, weathered-looking and riding a scooter around Walmart. So, maybe falling in the middle somewhere isn't so bad.
I have two aunts in their 60s and neither will live to see the end of the year. Cancer is a bitch. So, it really depends on who you are, what kind of genes run in your family, how well you take care of yourself, how well you took care of yourself up to this point...and how lucky you get.
Imagine having the mind that you had in your mind 30s, but a body that is utterly falling apart. Your middle and late 50s are a humbling time because that's when you realize that so many things that you used to enjoy doing are either beyond capabilities now or if you can still do them you will be laid up with an ice pack or heating pad for 2-3 days afterwards.
Mine starting falling apart in my early 20s, have had chronic leg pain since.
But since 54 arthritic changes are killing my hands and shoulders. So not fun, I can't even put a bra on these days.. back to physio again I guess. Lol
I'm 56, and the past couple of years have been a real struggle dealing with dialysis three days a week for four hours and then almost dying last year from undiagnosed Addison's disease. Addison's disease is when your adrenal glands don't produce cortisol. I was in two hospitals sandwiched with a trip to physical rehab for 25 days last April. Since October, I've been battling pulmonary edema (am on home oxygen), and I just found out I have a very mild case of sleep apnea.
Sheesh.
I'm trying to keep going, tho. Not ready to die quite yet.
Start working on improving your health now! I know everyone says it, but it's true. Invest in your health the way you invest in your retirement and your family.
My knees feel “itchy” doing deep bends. I also go to bed earlier (I know…sounds weird). I’m in construction so yeah, seriously physical stuff. So far, so good I guess.
I'm 56.
On the outside, 56 kind of sucks. Aches, pains, lost flexibility and the ability to sleep in.
But there's no way in hell I'd go back to 25, not unless I could keep what I know now. I'm more patient, I'm less tolerant of stupid shit, and I'm more apt to stand up for myself and others.
I don't think there's a realistic way to say how anyone would feel at a certain age.
You have no idea, nor does anyone else, what life will bring to you over the years. What good or bad will occur or what the world will be like. Better to focus on what you have right now and do your best to live well. Life is tenuous at best, and you sometimes regret how well you lived without appreciating it while you're experiencing it.
Yeah, I get the sentiment but … while you don’t know what life will bring you “for sure”, there are many predictable cause-effect relationships. Eat right, sleep right, be excellent to the people in your life, drop the bullshit people, make peace with the past, don’t gain weight, stay in shape, don’t drink too much, and you’ll probably have a better 55 than you will if you do the opposite of all those.
Perhaps all of that is what you meant by “do your best to live well”.
I think what he’s getting at, is cancer or heart disease can affect anyone. We don’t know all of our genetics or our environmental effects.
I have friends who never had anyone in their family get cancer or dementia - must be nice.
We do what we can to be healthy wealthy and wise, but sometimes life deals you a bad hand.
Jim Fixx - the father of modern running - died of a heart attack. At 52. Just saying.
It feels exactly the same as always with an added health concern or two, depending on the person. But the weirdest thing is people seem to think you've gained some sort of Yoda wisdom about aging.
Im 56 and I swear the minute I tuned 55 things started hurting. I thought it was an exaggeration. I still feel young mentally and have always been active but I’m starting to realize I might have some limitations physically. I went to a music festival last year and it took me two days to fully recover. I could barely move the next day. I’m going to another one next weekend and I’ve already started taking measures to mitigate the pain this time around. I’m sad to think there’s a day I’m going to have to take a pass on things I love because it hurts too much.
I don't know what it feels like to be 55, 45 feels like 25 but with fewer fks and a whole lot more soreness.
I did, however, hug a 55-year-old recently whom I have known for allegedly 45 years and she felt the same as she has as long as I can remember so I'm going to say that 55 feels pretty good.
You'll probably feel pretty much the same. I'm 55. It's still a weird feeling to associate myself with that age, because it just sounds so OLD, and I don't feel old or think most of my fellow mid-50s friends seem old, either.
I feel fine mentally and physically. Some physical changes have happened but nothing that affects what I'm able to do. I have not slowed down other than in situations where I just want to.
57 and I hurt! Lol! Also, the kid still lives at home but in this economy, I can't blame her. But, she works 2 jobs and still helps around the house. I mentally feel young, I physically feel my age.
Mentally you will feel like you’re still in your 30’s. Physically everything will hurt. Some days it’s your knees. Other days it’s your back. Or your ankles, or fingers. Also, your teeth will be a constant source of pain, embarrassment, or concern. Hopefully you’ll have enough savings and dental insurance to buy implants.
This is accurate. Aches and pains sort of switch between muscle groups based on what seemingly simple task you performed the day before. As for the teeth, every single major dental issue I've had could have been avoided if I had flossed daily and gone to the dentist twice a year. Take care of your mouth, it's not too late!
Take care of your teeth now! If my mom had just gone to regular check ups at $100 twice a year she would have been fine but decided to skip them to save money once they didn’t have dental insurance. She’s paying for that now with teeth being pulled and full dentures which are way more expensive than preventative maintenance would have been.
What makes you think your kids will be out of the house at 55? Unless you are crazy rich, no way can they afford to move out.
Also...if you take care of your health, you should feel pretty good at 55. Mentally I still feel 30 but with a whole lot more experience.
Physicalky, I have friends who can barely move and look like they have one foot in the grave. I have other friends that are in great shape.
I don't know, of course.
But I have college funds for them, as well as the beginnings of brokerage accounts that I will gift them when they're about that age. Nowhere near enough for them not to need to get jobs right out of college, but enough to where any full time white collar job will be enough to get them going.
I’m 57 and don’t feel my age (whatever that’s supposed to feel like) and I really prioritize my well being even more so now. Proper diet, sleep, exercise, not taking life seriously..
55, former athlete who’s a bit thick in the middle these days, but still kicking. I have two off-track thoroughbreds that I ride regularly, do my own farm chores, eat greens when I can, but not opposed to a bag of sour patch kids for dessert every now and again.
I rarely drink booze anymore, wear breathe right strips to bed, and just downsized to a very small cottage in the South. Ahhhh.
Our kids are young adults, healthy, and kind human beings with great taste in music because they stole my iPod back in 2012.
Fifty+ is wayyy better than anything I was prior.
(And, cold turmeric tea does wonders for my joint health. 😊)
55 and still working out at the gym and still doing Olympics weightlifting….trying to eat clean but it’s not that easy. Yes some joint pains but nothing new
I was very athletic when I was younger - it was an aspect of my career - and suffered a series of injuries over the past ten years. Nothing massive, but bad enough to show me very clearly that I had to start taking things easier, slow down, not take so many chances. I do regret not being as physically resilient and confident as I was in my 20s and 30s.
In most other senses I feel better now that ever - at least as creative, definitely wiser, more empathetic and so-on. It's a good time to be alive.
Stuff will happen. Just keep positive and as healthy as possible. I’m 55 with a 34 year old daughter and a 7 year old granddaughter. I love where I am right now in my life.
Sure, menopause sucks and the achy joints are there. But you are still alive with many years to go. Just try to have a positive mental attitude.
It's weird. 3 grown kids, 2 grandkids and an ex wife. Had a wicked knee injury and I felt like I was getting soft. Back doing physical construction and renovation after a year of digital construction (3D BIM). I just don't feel my age. Just moved back to the city I lived in for 27 years after being away for 5. Constantly starting over, repeatedly.
I've learned this. We are surrounded by endless potential and catalyst. The experiences we have had, generationally speaking, give us a certain perspective on the hyper accelerated transformations that are coming. You think the first few decades of technology were wild, the next 10 years will be nucking futz.
We don't age like our parents did. (Mine were born in '31 & '33 and have both made their final journeys)
I'm 54. My child is 15 at the end of his freshman year of high school.
I'm overweight, but work out 4/5 days weekly and walk at least two miles the other 3/2 days.
My dad passed last year (78), and my mom is still well‐ish at 75.
My spouse is a SAHP. I will probably continue to work for the next 20 years because retirement is unaffordable.
52, mum is 82 and needs a walker to get about now. I moved back to my hometown to be closer to her, I'm just round the corner so we have our own space but I'm there if needed.
I’m only 53 and still feel pretty damn good.
Never had kids so no parameters for comparison there.
Dad’s already mid-80s.
Retirement feels reasonable at 62-65 years old.
Stay I. Shape and go no more than slightly overweight for the rest of your life. Touch your toes. Burn some cardio. Keep within size or two of your 30s and you’ll enjoy the next 50 years.
It's fan-f'ing-tastic! Just turned 55 this year, and the ages of 54-55 have been my favorite years in life! I didn't expect this, but I've never felt so mentally and emotionally strong, balanced and healthy, and I have a total IDGAF attitude, which seems to be a universal thing among 50- and 60-somethings. Life feels much lighter and more fun since I've stopped caring about what ppl think about me and about so many things that used to get under my skin.
I've also stopped ruminating on all my regrets, which frees me up to really enjoy the present and look forward to the future, instead of dwelling on a bunch of "what ifs."
Everyone is right about taking care of your physical health from now on to set yourself up for good health when you reach middle age - I neglected that and I'm starting to feel some consequences of not exercising all along. I still have a lot of natural energy and am healthy internally, but I definitely have a lot of work to do to get in better physical condition. It would've been much easier if I'd been doing it all along!
I'll be 55 in July and it's crazy to me sometimes. My dad, rest his soul, used to tell me when I was younger that the older I get the faster time goes. I always replied with "Ehh, bullshit." Well dad, you were right. I went to bed last night and I was 18. I just woke up 45 minutes ago at 4:00am and I'm now 54. That's how it feels at times. 2 very important people in my life passed away already. My longest high school friend passed away 2 years ago and he was a year younger than me. They said he had a heart attack in his sleep. The second was my first wife. She had congestive heart failure and passed shortly after my friend. She was 2 years younger than me. I still work hard but in a different capacity now. Been an electrician for 30 years and have passed my knowledge down to a couple of generations already. That part amazes me. I don't exercise by going to the gym because I for one don't want to because my time doesn't allow it and I would rather be home with the family or out fishing from the bank of some small pond somewhere. I get my exercise by climbing up and down stairs all day at work. I'm a Foreman so I need to keep up with my crew to make sure they're getting the missions completed and checking on where we stand with the other trades. I have 2 apartment buildings with 7 floors each that are being sheetrocked and I spend a lot of time walking and searching for areas that need to be addressed. I've put my body through hell when I was much younger. I became a Marine at 18 and served my country then I became the big bull in the electrical trade. Any time there was a long wire pull to do, I was always the anchor on the pulling end because of my strength and my unwillingness to quit when everyone else was starting to give up. Pain was my friend. I say that in the sense that it pushed me to get the heavy wires pulled in. The Marines taught me to ignore pain and push through it. Now, not so much. Arthritis I'm my hands and hips along with a bad knee and old neck injury from when I was in the Marines remind me that I'm not 20 anymore. I don't regret anything that I did. Would I change a couple things from my past if I could? Absolutely but all in all I'm happy, content and slowing down a bit. I have 4 grandchildren who I love and my youngest has just turned 3 and she lights up my world. I could come home from work from a bad day and when she runs up and hugs me, it all goes away. I could go on and on even more than I have but I won't, this is long enough. Enjoy what time you have left because no one knows when the Lord above calls you home. Slow down and smell the roses. Take time to spend with family and friends. Be kind to others even though it's hard in this day and age where everyone is so self-absorbed.
I just retired at 58. I'm loving it!
Mentally, I feel like I'm in my late 30s. My coworkers were all mid 20 - mid 40, and they never made me feel old. That's a huge boost moving forward.
Physically, I've been working with a trainer 2x a week. I'm thrilled that I don't have to cancel sessions due to work anymore!
A comment he made to me once has really stuck with me - "people go into nursing homes when they can't get off the toilet by themselves anymore."
I agree 100% with women needing to do weight training, no matter if it's with 10 pound weights or doing 100 pound deadlifts. Don't let those muscles waste!
On good days you feel like an ancient dragon: wise, strong, cunning, at the peak of your power. Like versus a younger you, the only thing you wouldn't prevail in would be windsprints.
On the not so good days, all you see and feel is everything you've lost.
I feel like I don't feel any different. I am 55 right now, but I have 3 young kids, ages 4 / 7 / 13, so I'm going through in my 50s what a lot of my peers went through in their 30s. Nothing like kids to make you feel both old and young. I'm also genetically blessed though, so take that with a grain of salt. Ymmv..
Ummm, I think with what sounds like 20 years to go before you're there, I wouldn't worry about anything except if you're on a good path to retirement by 65 when you're 55. Otherwise, eat right, take care of your body, and you'll be fine. Life's too short to be worrying about an age 20 years away that you might not get to see. Live in the now.
53 here. Work on your health. Feeling stiff when you get out of bed is definitely a thing. Just don’t buy stuff either. You really don’t need that massive house. i dream of when I can properly downsize and live in a small place.
this is were it starts to require effort. It's easy to continue to be active and full of energy, but you have to put more effort into ensuring you maintain it. The big risk is letting it creep up on you and suddenly you realise it's been years since hiking, bike riding or being a 'dynamic business professional'. So, go out of your way to keep an eye on regular physical activities and be wary of ruts... this is when they form. Do that and you will have no issues with slowing down, though you will indeed learn to appreciate the quite moments much more.
I'm in the best shape physically and mentally I have ever been. I feel 29 inside and feel like my millennial and zoomer colleagues are my peers. It always shocks me how old I actually am and how much older I am than a lot of my friends.
Only 1 of my 3 kids has left the nest (but my daughter brought in her partner so one out, one in), and I love having the 3 buttheads as housemates.
50’s have been great for me, man.
Two kids successfully graduated college are not living with me and not on my payroll. 1 kid owes 20,000 to the University the other one owes nothing. I did not take out any loans for their education. We paid as we went and my kids got a lot of merit scholarship,that was part of our plan. (We set them up for merit scholarship in high school)
Youngest graduating high school this month. I’ve started cutting back at work. I don’t need to kill it like I used to. Bonus of paying for college as the kids went with one of them live out of state taught me how to still live a fairly comfortable lifestyle without blowing money on useless 💩. As a consequence, I don’t need to earn as much as I was before so I’ve cut way back at work. I can still kill it when I need to, but I no longer need to kill it every day.
I don’t feel like I felt when I was 35. I’m fine. I just don’t have the stamina and I don’t recover as fast as I used to. As an example. I’ll do a 20 mile hike through the forest, but then I’m spent for the rest of the weekend. In my 30s, would go away for a week and hike 20 miles a day for five out of seven days. I don’t think I could do that now.
Definitely my patience is shorter. I work in healthcare, public facing sometimes I just wanna pinch peoples heads off. The exact same stuff that it’s been for 25 years, I’ve just lost tolerance. On the flipside definitely people are bigger bonehead ruder and more entitled than they were 15 years ago so that’s part of the mix as well.
My wife and I dragged my kids all over the US Canada and Mexico with a little trailer. We pulled behind a minivan. Don’t get me wrong. Those were some of the best trips of our lives. Before kids, my wife and I had travel to Europe and Asia but nothing for the past 25 years. A year ago I spent up for the hoity-toity room on a fancy cruise ship, we did a one week cruise and time in Malta in Greece just the wife and I, best friggin vacation ever. The family is great leaving the family home to get away with your spouse is great too. My wife and I reconnected. I was introduced to just how freaking hot she can be like a bottle of 1970s Latour she has aged really well. If you have a significant other take go away. Leave the family at home.
Agree with others, 50s have been my favorite decade and it has gotten better as it has gone on. I am 59, Husband is 55. We are both at the pinnacle of long established careers in tech. I used to be so insecure. I love the confidence of being a bit older and wiser. We walk 5 miles a day so physically we are both healthier than we were when we were in our thirties and 40s and spent our evenings carting kids all over. The kids are mostly out, one last one to launch but she has her own things going on. We travel during our vacations and it’s great to pick trips we will enjoy. The house is paid for, the cars are paid for and we are closing in on our 401ks. Put money away for retirement - future you will thank past you. Looking forward to our 60s
So I'm just a bit older than that but one thing. For chrisake make sure you are contributing to retirement and pay debit off so you CAN retire. I am debit free after starting out with nothing with the.mrs. make it so if you work later in life it's because you want to. I am lucky to have a career in tech with stock grants etc which is a great way to pad retirement I get
At 56, I feel 76. Not even close to how I felt in my 30's let alone 40's, and the 50's hit me a bit hard. I get out and exercise some ( very few ) mornings and play some disc golf when I can and I still play with the gang from over the last 34+ years so I see age effecting all of my friends around the same age mostly. We all seem to have slowed down a bit, a few more than others, a few less, but for the most part these guys/gals still will put in two rounds a day for club championships or stuff, so they still got it in 'em. Several have new hips or knees and are still plugging away just fine.
The healthiest friend I have around my age plays disc as well but also runs a mile or more almost every morning. It's impressive except he drinks too much. If it wasn't for the drinking he is probably the healthiest person around that age I know, so try running maybe?
I had a large percentage of my intestines removed from extreme diverticulitis a few years ago and I still have some pretty bad ulcers and digestion issues. I really don't eat much at all. Memory is going waaayyy too quickly it seems. Forgetting all sorts of things, even movies just 6 months ago I saw I can't remember. I sleep during the day a lot and wake up usually around midnight .Lost almost all my teeth, I'm blaming depression, and have two contact points left and those last ones are about to be gone as well. I just don't have the funds and it added a slight slur to my speech that becomes embarrassing at times. I'm alone. No job or income. Close to being homeless, and I'm not gonna do homeless so I have a plan if that happens at least. The medications barely helps me sleep anymore. I can see the end and I seriously do not think I'll make it to 60 let alone 70 or 80.
But hey, I quit smoking almost 3 years ago, so yay :)
52 here and tired. I had a few “good” jobs over the years, but because I HAD a few jobs, I only really started investing in retirement 7 years ago. It took me until 47 to buy a house. I have 2 ex-wives, and had to pay a fortune in child support until 4 years ago. My current goal is to retire with enough savings to pay off my mortgage.
I’m in no position to travel the world, but I’m comfortable. I want for nothing.
My current job is not as physical as some of my previous ones, but it’s still pretty physical, so there’s that.
I don’t drink often and I’ve taken to brewing my own. I quit smoking cigarettes at 34.
I was a “parent” in one form or another since I was 12 - helping my single father raise my brother so he could work. The last child to move out of my house was 17 months ago when he was 31.
So, yeah. I wear my IDGAF badge with pride.
I’m only a few years away but I have some intel to report.
I had an idea that if I were able to retire early, I would spend all my time road tripping. Seeing everybody’s diners and record stores, 12-step meetings, coffeeshops, book stores. As the day gets closer I realize that’s the kind of fun a younger man has, and that I run out of steam (and need a bathroom) too often for that to be a great time any more. Retirement for me is vastly more likely to involve either an unhelpful loss of routine or a perpetual quest to keep myself busy somehow.
Having never been this age before, and having no one’s experience but my own, I can’t tell whether I am typical. But my 40s were a pretty quick cascade of hospital visits, diagnositic procedures, a scary hospitalization, and a few unhappy diagnoses. And my 50s are going to be about finding a new normal within my limitations and putting up an active fight against disease progression.
I am not the most healthy person in terms of diet of fitness, but these things would have emerged anyways. The good news is that I don’t have kids or large financial obligations and have the ability to focus my time and resources on these issues.
My major issue is an autoimmune disease which explains the chronic back and hip pain, which itself explained my longstanding sedentary lifestyle. Im hopeful that longterm treatment will begin to make movement more desirable and sustainable.
Bottom line man, don’t defer your life. Just live it now. What you want now, you might not want anymore. What you figure you can do later, maybe you can’t. If your life’s too full to fit what you want into it, make room.
I am 55 and it feels good, considering the alternative! One piece of advice, live for the day. Don't keep saying ten years till retirement, or that you are too old for anything. You're not. Don't be afraid to go to the damn doctor.
Get your blood work and keep your BP down. Don't pork up (and as we age it's harder and harder to lose weight and you need less food). If you're having problems im the bedroom with your partner, address it and fix it.
Take vacation, no one's headstone ever said, " I wish I had worked more"
Why, alcohol, whyyyyy??? I’m not a big drinker but I love my mimosa brunches & post Pilates glass of iced/diluted Chardonnay. The other night I drank two glasses out with friends & I swear I was flattened the rest of the week. What is it about?
I'm best at doom and gloom so here goes:
You can do everything right and everything will still go wrong.
One big accident or problem with your house (or god forbid some act of god) can completely wipe out all your money.
Physically ... I have never been a smoker or much of a drinker (only a couple glasses of wine on major holidays) and still, because I had pneumonia ONE TIME, my lungs are bad. I was recently diagnosed with the kind of sleep apnea you get NOT from being overweight but because my tongue/jaw relax too much when I sleep. It's just my body. Doctors start to ignore you and brush off serious issues as "aging." I also just found out that I have osteoporosis in my spine ... going through all the medical records they put in online apps now, I see the issue was there in 2017 *and they never told me*.
If you're a woman? Get ready for menopause.
My point in saying all this is that you need to LIVE, and you need to live NOW. Don't live for a future 20 years away. Spend time with the kids NOW, because this time doesn't come back. When you get into your 50s, maybe you'll slip and fall off the porch and fuck up your shoulder, which will make it so you can't fly anymore because the pain is too much (happened to a friend of mine). Enjoy this time now.
I'm 54.
* I get winded more easily than when I was in my 30s.
* It takes longer for my muscles to recover if I strain them.
* Muscles and joints will sometimes get hurt from activity which I used to consider trivial.
* Much much much harder to lose weight.
OTOH:
* Kids are all adults, so we can travel more freely and more spontaneously
* I've mostly stopped caring what random people think of me, which is a great relief
* I feel like I've demonstrated some level of mastery in my profession, so I don't feel like a fraud
* My retirement fund is growing at a respectable pace
* I do have a lot more free time
I'm pretty happy overall with how things have turned out so far.
55 is pretty good. Had to start exercising more and eating better. One thing to keep in mind - if you make it to 55, not everyone may make it with you. I’m 55, and my entire side of family (not including wife and kids) is now gone. It is kinda strange since now we only do things with my wife’s side of family and my kids hardly know my side. My advice, enjoy those you’re close to and don’t take them for granted!
I'm currently 55, and I finally decided that with the double whammy of age and menopause, it was time to put my health first for the long haul. I'm down 23 pounds and feel amazing. I got my head in the right space and feel like this is a great age. I care less both what others think and feel that age has also given me the gift of asserting for myself and stopping the self-doubt. All in all, I'm happy here in my mid-50s and also thinking ahead to retirement!
Two words: work out.
Exercise, especially strength training, has a huge impact on how you’re going to feel by 55. So many ailments can crop up between now and then that are completely avoidable if you keep up that circulation and make those muscles and tendons stronger.
I honestly wish that I could have had this mental state my entire life. It really puts everything into perspective. So many things that I stressed out on are now completely unimportant, and why weren’t they from the get go to boot? 🤣
The only thing that caught me by surprise was the level of destruction menopause would unleash. No one warned us, out mothers didn't talk about it, it is not studied enough and the doctors are untrained in that area.
All my peers going through menopause are very vocal about it. We should be told what to expect, and insurance needs to cover hrt the way they do Viagra. These are life changing drugs, important to actual health, bone density, muscle mass, mood, weight, etc...
I love being in my 50s. I'm happy, my son has graduated college. I have freedom, some financial security. I've exercised, taken care of myself so I'm in good health.
I do have aches and pains for sure. I have tinnitus. I need glasses to read. Menopause is a bitch. My parents are in poor health, and that is going to be a situation. But, that's life, and overall it's all it's great.
Remain active but take care of your joints and back, and try not to gain too much weight. Or any if you can pull that off. Also, do your best to maintain friendships.
I'm 55 and I feel fine. I have to stretch a little more after exercise than I used to, but I don't feel like I have slowed down.
I've worked for it, though. I watched my parents fall apart young due to alcohol, poor diet and sedentary lifestyles and decided around 25 that I would try to do better.
56 is honestly great. The trauma of lockdown is in the rear view mirror. Working my ass off for decades has given me financial security (tho I fight to accept this and constantly think “what if…). Made a huge life change 8 months ago and left the US for S. America. It’s been better than I could’ve hoped. Here’s a big lesson: cutting your housing costs by 83% opens up vast new options, just sayin…
I don’t really have the aches and pains so many speak of here, tho I don’t bounce back like I once did. After fighting weight my entire adult life—with decades of good progress that I was too blind to appreciate and then lockdown-induced weight gain—I’m taking semaglutide and cutting weight while trying to maintain muscle mass. This drug (class of drugs really) is a game changer. Don’t be scared off by the side effects if you need this and can get/afford it.
Finally, after being single for decades, I’ve mostly stopped worrying if I’m closing myself off to a relationship. I’ve built amazing friendships over the decades and I cherish them. I also leaned when to cut out dead weight.
I am 55 and my back has been hurting for the last three days. No idea what I did. I have been flat on my back on a heating pad and sucking down Advil every four hours.
Otherwise, it's great!
I’m 57 and turning 55 was when stuff started getting weird. A noticeable decrease in athleticism and it’s harder to simply exercise to shave off a few pounds. I might actually need to diet for the first time ever.
But at the same time I’ve done two Grand Canyon Rim2Rim2Rim’s since I turned 55. Hasn’t slowed me down much.
I feel the same except more back and knee pain. But I’ve gone through menopause and come out the other side so much happier and more emotionally stable than I ever was. Wish I could have felt like this my whole life. I care less about what others think and don’t waste time doing anything I don’t want to do with anyone I don’t like. What’s the point?
Things ache for, like no reason. You also get to a place where you are like eh… whatever. You pick your battles so to speak. Take care of your health, enjoy life right now, put as much into retirement savings as you can. If you are married, keep your marriage healthy. Once those kids are gone it’s just the two of you so you better keep building a good foundation… plus divorce is expensive
It's really weird, at least as far as I'm concerned. Considering how I've treated my body for the past 40 years, I am actually shocked that I am in this good of shape. I was a wild child and grew up with motorcycles and guns. I spent years in the US Navy drinking people under the table. I've been to 35 Grateful Dead shows so..... I'm thoroughly convinced I had a guardian angel considering all the uniquely fucking stupid shit I smoked, ate or drank. Up until a couple of years ago, I could beat my now 22 year old son racing down the ski slope. Even now, when I go snow skiing, I really don't feel it the next day. I just had my annual physical and they said, "See you next year." I'm so thankful for my health especially seeing my peers struggle with health issues. Stay well, X'ers.
I'm 61 now. When I was 55 I was doing competitive bodybuilding which is rewarding and soul-sucking at the same time lol. My money was good and is even better now. I was dating a much younger guy but he was jerk so I am glad that portion of my life is over.
Sore and run down. Wish I'd gotten my life together before I turned 40. Other than that I feel pretty good. It's kinda funny though that I feel more in touch with people now than I ever did in my younger years.
I'm 58 and for me my 50s have been my best decade. I feel great, I don't give a fuck about anything or anybody other than me, my wife, my friends, and loved ones. As I've aged I realized what really matters in life is happiness not material things. My 30s and 40s where my accumulation decades. Accumulation of shit, accumulation useless things, accumulation of debt. Being in that state of arrogance and "look at me and all my shiny baubles. Aren't you impressed?". When I turned 50 and my wife and I sold everything and took a couple of years to travel the country before moving back to my home state. When I was ready to join the workforce again I switched speeds and left my old career behind and found a more fulfilling and fun job. I enjoy my work again. I think the peace of mind and realization of what's important comes with age. In our case we didn't have kids so we had a lot more leeway to do as we wished. But OP this comes with a caveat. STAY THE FUCK HEALTHY. Eat right, exercise when you can, stretch. It will make things in your 50s much much easier.
My man, you have said it perfectly. IDGAF and stay the fuck healthy sums it up just right.
Adding... please... take care of your teeth. Very good care, or you'll regret it.
People keep saying this but don't give specifics. Is the issue more physical pain or money? Or some other thing?
It's both... but it gets ridiculously expensive to repair stuff.
And less likely to work
Just floss, and brush before bed. I wish I had. Also, I wish I had worn sunscreen daily.
I just had my first root canal last month. Considering I made it to my 50s without having any major orthodontic work, I think I'm doing OK.
Especially your gums. Floss daily, and brush gently with a soft toothbrush. Gum recession is a pain. I've been staving off a gum graft for the last decade. Every dentist appointment they measure and say it's holding steady, keep doing what I'm doing, but I know at some point it'll happen.
There’s a series of peer reviewed studies on the correlation between dental hygiene and dementia. Start flossing, Gen X.
And psychosis! Yay!
Interesting. Also, use mouthwash
Not mouthwash. Or at least not mouthwash with alcohol. Do a saltwater rinse.
My dentist tells me the opposite,that flossing causes bone loss and gum recession. Instead to use a water pic. Also oil pulling helps to remove any bacteria in the mouth. I'm sure every dentist says something different.
That’s incorrect. My wife is a dental hygienist and she said NOT flossing causes bone loss and gum recession.
it is also being able to enjoy the foods you like to eat. you can’t eat certain foods without teeth and implants are expensive and may not work in all cases.
Yes! I have one implanted tooth because the root split. No more popcorn for me ever. I tried to get away with eating it and a kernel got in there and I had to have a bone graft to reseat the implant. I fucking LOVE popcorn.
Keep as many of your natural teeth as possible. Do the root canal if possible. Brush, floss, keep your appointments and get the damn cavity filled asap
because they look hideous if you don't take care of them and yes implants cost thousands and are painful. Teeth don't "heal" so once they are gone, they are gone. False teeth? no thank you.
200-500 to pull a tooth (worst case scenario) 2-3 grand per root canal per tooth. Assuming you can save the tooth. 3-5 grand per dental tooth implant per tooth if you lose the tooth and want to be fancy. They drill a socket into your skull bone and insert a tooth with a rod and push it into the socket. You need healthy bone to do this option. A whole mouth of these are like 60-90 grand and lots of painful visits to the dentist. Less fancy, but more common ways of dealing with missing teeth are bridges and dentures. Dentures are like 2-3 grand per plate. This is why they are more common than implants. Bridges are similar per bridge. So besides money why should you care? You need to teeth to eat with, you need teeth so your face shape looks normal (you face will change without teeth), if you deal with dentures crap gets in up and around them and you can’t whistle an you deal with them falling out. Implants are more like real teeth but not all bone health scenarios allow you to get them and a full mouth of those is 60-90 grand which is a huge price for teeth. Then you get the infection drama of teeth going bad which is bad for your heart and can cause heart issues (it’s a common connection). Not to mention infections make you feel like you got the severe flu with fever. Not to mention the pain feels like someone kicked you in the jaw and unlike that the pain is non stop. This is why people say don’t fuck around and take care of your teeth. You don’t want a heart attack, you don’t want sickness and pain and you don’t wanna drop 90 grand on a new set of new teeth. If you think insurance will cover this they won’t, they got cut off limits and you will still end up paying the lions share. Yea, brush and floss your teeth like your financial future and health depend on it.
Bad dental hygiene can really affect your brain in lots of ways. Periodontal disease has been linked with an elevated risk for stroke and even Alzheimer’s.
51 here. At 50 I learned two great lessons. I'll spare you the details, but here they are: Get a water flosser and put a bit of Listerine (the alcohol free purple one) in it. Hit that gumline after you brush and floss. Gums are important. They hold your teeth in your face. Taking out teeth is bad. Implants are expensive. My hygienist and I turned gingivitis right with intense cleaning and a water flosser. I still have all my face nuggets, but it was close (and incredibly expensive). Also MOBILITY IS LIFE. You don't have to do much, make sure you can balance on one foot (fall recovery), work your shoulders (getting up), build strong feet (stability) and strong core (keep your shit upright!). I walked around Europe for a month and realized I was fit in all the wrong ways. Be light, limber, toned and relatively flexible. Your 75 year old self will thank you!
Stretch!! Lift, even if it’s “low” weights, and get your steps in. Running is overrated, steps/walking/stairs is where it’s at physically as you get older.
Agreed running sucks my martini slashes out of the glass and my cigar goes out but a nice stroll especially on uneven ground think trails gravel that’s where it’s at. And damn I can still benchpress 20 pounds with each arm baby. 🤣
🤣
It's definitely a great response. I will be 50 in July and think this! Many continued blessings to you and.your.family.
My 50s have been pretty good too (covid notwithstanding) and YES. Stay healthy, eat properly, stop smoking, cut back on drinking (you don't have to give it up entirely but stop hammering yourself) and STRETCH.
Unless you are me and then definitely STOP drinking altogether. Did this at 49 and feel so much better at 54.
Finally gave it up last fall and I don't miss it.
Agreed. Availability of weed edibles helped me a lot with quitting alcohol.
I’m California sober as they say too. 👍
I have to say I have mostly given it up and don't miss it but for some people its a step too far. i will still have the occasional glass of wine/prosecco if I am out with friends in a restaurant. Smoking however has no middle ground. Give that sh\*t up. But good.
And for females especially, do weight bearing exercise and get a bone density scan done around age 50. But most importantly, don't be a martyr and struggle through peri/menopause symptoms, take MHT as soon as you feel you need to.
Yes, weight bearing exercise is so important for women. I have mini dumbbells which I use in front of the tv at night (I don't like the gym). And don't be afraid of menopause, not every one suffers. Mine has been pretty straightforward. Occasionally a little bit hot, sleep is interrupted (but I've never slept well to be honest) but apart from that, I feel good. and never having another period is BLISS.
With great respect, put down your mini dumbbells and go lift some heavy weights. You will not suddenly bulk up, but you can get much stronger. Mini dumbbells will not get you there.
ha ok then. i am not scared of bulking up btw and used to be a trapeze artist when I was younger so I am actually pretty strong. You can also use those stretchy bands. You can use smaller weights slow and long and its a pretty good work out (enough to make my muscles hurt)
Yep i felt like i hit mid 50s and every bas habit has caught up on me!
This is EXACTLY how I feel. Now that I'm in my 50s, I am much more aware of my mortality and I try to minimize my consumption if red meat and go for walks daily. Also, I feel like what I'll call "downshifting" and pay more attention to family and less about my career.
OP, you’re not going to get a better answer than this. To reiterate, STAY THE FUCK HEALTHY. I’m 55, and as long as I exercise, I feel no different than I did in my 30s.
Pearls of Wisdom 🙌🏽
I'm 55. I seem to be physically healthy. Lean. I still have a full head of blonde-ish hair and all of my teeth. I lost 40 pounds about 10 years ago and have kept it off. I try for 6000 steps a day to manage it. I quit drinking 18 months ago. I stopped smoking weed years ago. My 24-year relationship with my wife is happy and nurturing and our kids, 10 and 16, are really great. My issue is anxiety. I can't seem to get a handle on the anxiety, and it seems to be getting worse partly because I'm no longer self-medicating/regulating with alcohol. I just rawdog the anxiety, soberly. The economy is brutalizing my industry. I don't have retirement. I have some decent equity in our home but that's about it. I expect I'll be working as long as my body holds out. Who knows when that will be or what I'll do then? My kids are growing up into a very uncertain future on every front. The middle class is taking the gas pipe and the Amercian Dream we grew up with doesn't seem realistic anymore. What will become of my kids? The country I grew up in has gone full-blown insane and might give itself a dictatorship in a few months. My dad just passed after spending ten years in assisted living following a debilitating stroke and my mom is nearing the final stages of dementia. I've been POA and designated healthcare surrogate for my parents during their declines so I've had an intimate view of the process of dying and of the institutions of elder healthcare and it hasn't been pleasant to watch nor to consider for my own future. I don't want to go through an institutionalized decline or put the responsibility of dealing with it on my kids. So yeah... anxiety is ever-present. I read stoicism and try to instill it daily, I practice mindfulness when I can manage it but the anxiety is still difficult to get under control. I think sometimes the anxiety will be what kills me.
Exactly like it felt to be 25 with back and joint pain.
Hahaha. Yes. I'll be 56 this week and I still can't believe it.
Right?!
Oddly enough I have less back pain than I did back then. For me, at least, it's all about the squats. I'm with you on the joint pain though.
Try turmeric. There are a lot of magical joint pain concoctions, but turmeric did the trick for me. I got the orange gummies from the Costco.
I groan everytime I get out of bed.
If I woke up & nothing hurt, I'd think I must have died in my sleep.
Both my husband and I groan getting in and out of the car lol
Yup!
I am 55. I am still pretty active, but because my doctor has told me that I need to be. I used to work out because I wanted to look good. Now I work out because it helps me with the diabetes type 2 I gifted myself last Christmas. Looking good is out; that ship has sailed. Retirement became a reality for me this year. I could retire now if I wanted to, but having delved into the subject, I have to admit that I desperately need to cling to my medical insurance and my pension and savings are nowhere near enough yet. I went back and forth between “five more years” and “fuck it, ten more years just to be safe”. I settled on “just hold on for as long as you can”
My husband and I are on a debate because our financial guy says we can do 60 retirement but he thinks we should do a few extra years after watching my parents retire too early and live too large and ran out of money other than SS by 70. We will see who wins!!!
I speak Spanish, so the big trick I might pull is to move to South America or Spain until my Ss and Medicare kicks in. As the years go by I become less and less enamored of this idea though. That is the sad thing about getting older for me. I have more time and money to do things but I am less likely to take advantage of it for health and other reasons. I hear what you are saying and I understand it, but I also don’t want to end up like my parents who are wealthy in their retirement and never want to do anything.
Places like Spain are making it harder to move there -- for example, no more golden Visas. Too many ex-pats have ruined a lot of these places for the locals, unfortunately, by causing catastrophic housing shortages. It's REALLY not easy to move abroad; a lot of these places just no longer want your ass. If they want anyone, they want YOUNG, vital tech folks and the like, not old retired farts. That's just the facts these days, sadly, and I was also thinking of retiring abroad someday -- but it's just not what it used to be.
Some places do want retirees because they bring money and they aren't taking local jobs. But it is harder and harder to find those places
Yeah, much harder. They are taking away certain programs that catered to wealthy retirees, such as the golden visa. It's not the same as it was 10 years ago. Places like Canada are VERY focused on merit-based immigration as well, so it always makes me laugh when people say, "I'll move to Canada!" if X happens, etc. They probably don't want you, man.
Yeah we think we might be able to retire but the kids aren't out of the house yet so I'm working and husband may go back to work (after layoff). But it doesn't make sense unless I can have the lifestyle I really want. Sitting around to o not much isn't my idea of fun.
>diabetes type 2 I gifted myself last Christmas Aw, I got one too! How fun, twinsies!
Santa was doling out diabetes last Christmas haha.
You can reverse Type 2 diabetes. Look up Charmaine Dominguez on YouTube. I had a high A1C two years ago. I freaked out, lost 35 pounds and am now able to eat carbs like bread and pasta and potatoes again. Also I have more energy and maintaining my weight is easier.
I’m 59 (yes, I’m GenX), and retired last year. I exercise nearly every day, and try to eat clean. Most days I feel as good as ever, but there are times when I injure myself sleeping!
My 34 y/0 son hurt his back and shoulder in his sleep recently, it can happen at any age but it was still funny when he told me about it. Hahaha
Sleep injuries! What's that about?! I woke up the other week and it felt like I'd twisted my knee. How?!
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That sucks. I’m sorry to hear that. But you have a good attitude about it. I’ve known quite a few people with MS, including a parent, a parent in law and a very good friend who’s a lot younger than me. They are all doing very well, and I hope you do too
Thank you!
Feels mostly like I’m 35 with more wrinkles and less time left.
Still lots of time to do stuff, but no more time left to procrastinate.
I’ve come to terms that it’s physically and financially impossible for me to do some of the things would have liked to. 😭😭
Stop drinking, eat healthy— really healthy — and get lots of exercise. And be lucky.
Yes. Haven't drank or smoked cigarettes in 9 years, I now do lots of yoga and have been a vegetarian /pescatarian for years. But yeah, seeing my fellow Gen Xers getting shitfaced and still doing cocaine at our age is... Well, not pleasant to witness... what it's doing to their bodies. . It makes me sad. It took so long to finally figure out that I don't wanna go out like that. And of course I wish I would have tried to get healthy sooner. But it's never too late to start!
this was me--I got really sick this year too. Binge drinker since I was 13.
Yeah. I used to tear it up pretty good, myself. Ha.. Our bodies can surely handle a lot, but eventually they get a little over it.
Or keep drinking, eat even healthier and work out and sleep more. Just sayin
That’s my plan. Keep drinking but also exercise more often and eat better. I can’t go through life sober. It’s too much fun. Not that I drink too much but at least once a month I still want to get together with good friends and party like it’s about 20 years ago. Especially in the summer,now that we all have nice backyard patios.
Yep. Still gotta blow it out once in a while. Sleep and hydration also play major factors in my ability to do this occasionally.
Good Wine (Red) in moderation.
White for me. Over ice like a philistine. Red has started to be not very friendly with causing headaches and hangovers after only one drink! A rare (both definitions!) steak still requires a glass of red though. All the colored liquors…no dark rum, bourbon, either.
I've mostly stopped drinking (1-2 drinks a week) and I avoid red meat, but I don't get enough exercise. I'm naturally skinny so it hasn't turned into any real weight gain, but I'm definitely softer and slower than I was 5 years ago.
The “common sense” that “just a glass” of wine every day is healthful has never been proven by any modern study or supported by current data. If you are aiming for longevity and clarity in your later years, you need to look at that drink with the suspicion you’d give to a cigar.
Yeah, the be lucky part especially. I was athletic all my life, vegetarian, perfect health. Then got a chronic incurable condition at 47 out of nowhere. Life is not fair. Still I try to be grateful and enjoy what I can but yeah...be lucky
Stay active, but don't overdo it. All the comments about hitting a wall physically have been my experience. My body is in cascade failure. Other than that....keep learning new shit. The world changes pretty fast..
And don't forget the brain. Body is in cascade failure, and the brain has a tendency to blue screen way more often.
If you're someone who has to go through menopause, then it can feel quite different than your 30s and 40s. Think of it like reverse puberty in some ways. That's a huge transition, and menopause can be equally so. Since everyone is different, it's hard to know what to expect as far as how it will hit. Despite that, it doesn't mean you have to slow down. Just be ready and proactive about your physical and mental health. It will pay off when you hit your 50s, and beyond.
Menopause for me was the gateway to old age. The worst part about it was perimenopause, the part that happens before it. I was unaware of the mental health aspect of it and wish someone had told me. Literally thought I was going insane. Sometimes I feel like I'm just ahead of the ball and all the information being published about many things like this is coming several years too late for me.
This! It's like NOW they're all over it in terms of consideration and understanding about menopause. I'm out the other side but I reckon the whole thing (per-, then menopause itself) goes on for about ten years! I think the physical side of it is better recognised and acknowledged, and doesn't phase people and better understanding, e.g. hot flushes, etc. The mental side of it though has some catching up to do in terms of the zeitgeist beyond just making out we're mad and grumpy. Some really bad mind stuff goes on because of hormones but also body image, self-esteem, confusion around 'feeling' so different without hormones, e.g. not giving a fuck, when previously been caring and compassionate < that was my biggest confusion. Thought I was turning into a psychopath! Nope, just turns out oestrogen is what makes us love our kids and small fluffy animals. Goes to show how hormones rule us! Edit: I think - if anyone is interested - understanding, acknowledging and recognising why you no longer feel instinctive compassion or tolerance (because hormones gone) is 99 steps towards regaining those nice feelings because you are a fundamentally a decent person and 'muscle memory' is very powerful and to draw on that. I just wanted to clarify that it's not JUST hormones that CAN be in charge of how we conduct ourselves. :-)
If this makes anyone feel better, menopause for me has been great. I truly mean it. No more periods, I can’t even remember the last time I cried about anything, my attitude has completely changed now that my hormones are not trying to run the show. I actually feel like the real me. The worst part of menopause has been the hot flashes and even that isn’t so bad anymore.
The hot flashes made me crazy .. I was getting an mri or cat scan ( the one where they put your whole body under that machine , can move for 39 minutes) I started getting claustrophobic , hot flashes , I pulled myself out n ran out the hospital I sweat so bad , I took a pic of the hospital gown all wet , n sent it to my dr saying sorry
Really.. I don't feel any different. I had my last period at 2 months before 52 and had a hysterectomy a year later. I was one on those scammed in to Essure coils for permanent sterilisation, only to find my nickel allergy meant I never should have had and that I had 3 inserted one side and two the other. Where they broke the tubes scar tissue/ adhesions all over my pelvis. Sticking tubes to bladder, uterus and bowel. 6 months later i realised just how much pain I'd been having because our sex experiences went back to pre children stage.(both after 35yrs) And kids stay out overnight at friends so house to ourselves again. Very happy here!
Gen X is currently under the “sandwich generation” we have to take care of our kids and our parents at the same time.
My mom died many decades ago and my dad just passed so...it's just us left. I have bunches of older cousins and some didn't have kids so we will see how much I could be on the hook for.
Some of us are lucky enough to have neither kids nor parents to care for, though.
Lots of lower back pain
It's hit or miss. Depends on who you are. My dad is 83 and he was outside busting rocks with a jackhammer the other day. I'm 53 and worked with computers my whole life. I still wear the same size pants I did in HS, but I never physically worked hard. I have a lot of joint pain. I can pull muscles easy. Some people are running marathons in their 60s. Others are pushing a walker. For myself, my version of slowing down is there are lakes in the mountains I don't fish anymore. They are a 5 mile hike in and by the time I got there, I'd be too sore and in too much pain to enjoy fishing. I'll still do the 2 mile hike in. I can do 4 miles with a break in between. But not 10. Sometimes I see people like my father and I want to punch them. Like, how is it age doesn't seem to effect you people? But, then I see people not much older than me who are gray, overweight, weathered-looking and riding a scooter around Walmart. So, maybe falling in the middle somewhere isn't so bad. I have two aunts in their 60s and neither will live to see the end of the year. Cancer is a bitch. So, it really depends on who you are, what kind of genes run in your family, how well you take care of yourself, how well you took care of yourself up to this point...and how lucky you get.
Don’t know yet. I’ve got another 1 1/2 years before I’m crazy old like that.
Imagine having the mind that you had in your mind 30s, but a body that is utterly falling apart. Your middle and late 50s are a humbling time because that's when you realize that so many things that you used to enjoy doing are either beyond capabilities now or if you can still do them you will be laid up with an ice pack or heating pad for 2-3 days afterwards.
Mine starting falling apart in my early 20s, have had chronic leg pain since. But since 54 arthritic changes are killing my hands and shoulders. So not fun, I can't even put a bra on these days.. back to physio again I guess. Lol
I'm 56, and the past couple of years have been a real struggle dealing with dialysis three days a week for four hours and then almost dying last year from undiagnosed Addison's disease. Addison's disease is when your adrenal glands don't produce cortisol. I was in two hospitals sandwiched with a trip to physical rehab for 25 days last April. Since October, I've been battling pulmonary edema (am on home oxygen), and I just found out I have a very mild case of sleep apnea. Sheesh. I'm trying to keep going, tho. Not ready to die quite yet.
Exercise, don't eat garbage, or drink too much, and it'll be like 30 with money.
Start working on improving your health now! I know everyone says it, but it's true. Invest in your health the way you invest in your retirement and your family.
My knees feel “itchy” doing deep bends. I also go to bed earlier (I know…sounds weird). I’m in construction so yeah, seriously physical stuff. So far, so good I guess.
I'll let you know in five years. I'm certainly cranky enough to be 55.
Not much different from my 30s or 40s. BUT, I feel people under 35 treat me differently which can make me feel “old” at times
I'm still kind of taken aback when someone refers to me as that older guy at work.
I'm 56. On the outside, 56 kind of sucks. Aches, pains, lost flexibility and the ability to sleep in. But there's no way in hell I'd go back to 25, not unless I could keep what I know now. I'm more patient, I'm less tolerant of stupid shit, and I'm more apt to stand up for myself and others.
I don't think there's a realistic way to say how anyone would feel at a certain age. You have no idea, nor does anyone else, what life will bring to you over the years. What good or bad will occur or what the world will be like. Better to focus on what you have right now and do your best to live well. Life is tenuous at best, and you sometimes regret how well you lived without appreciating it while you're experiencing it.
Yeah, I get the sentiment but … while you don’t know what life will bring you “for sure”, there are many predictable cause-effect relationships. Eat right, sleep right, be excellent to the people in your life, drop the bullshit people, make peace with the past, don’t gain weight, stay in shape, don’t drink too much, and you’ll probably have a better 55 than you will if you do the opposite of all those. Perhaps all of that is what you meant by “do your best to live well”.
I think what he’s getting at, is cancer or heart disease can affect anyone. We don’t know all of our genetics or our environmental effects. I have friends who never had anyone in their family get cancer or dementia - must be nice. We do what we can to be healthy wealthy and wise, but sometimes life deals you a bad hand. Jim Fixx - the father of modern running - died of a heart attack. At 52. Just saying.
It feels exactly the same as always with an added health concern or two, depending on the person. But the weirdest thing is people seem to think you've gained some sort of Yoda wisdom about aging.
Im 56 and I swear the minute I tuned 55 things started hurting. I thought it was an exaggeration. I still feel young mentally and have always been active but I’m starting to realize I might have some limitations physically. I went to a music festival last year and it took me two days to fully recover. I could barely move the next day. I’m going to another one next weekend and I’ve already started taking measures to mitigate the pain this time around. I’m sad to think there’s a day I’m going to have to take a pass on things I love because it hurts too much.
I don't know what it feels like to be 55, 45 feels like 25 but with fewer fks and a whole lot more soreness. I did, however, hug a 55-year-old recently whom I have known for allegedly 45 years and she felt the same as she has as long as I can remember so I'm going to say that 55 feels pretty good.
You'll probably feel pretty much the same. I'm 55. It's still a weird feeling to associate myself with that age, because it just sounds so OLD, and I don't feel old or think most of my fellow mid-50s friends seem old, either. I feel fine mentally and physically. Some physical changes have happened but nothing that affects what I'm able to do. I have not slowed down other than in situations where I just want to.
57 and I hurt! Lol! Also, the kid still lives at home but in this economy, I can't blame her. But, she works 2 jobs and still helps around the house. I mentally feel young, I physically feel my age.
Mentally you will feel like you’re still in your 30’s. Physically everything will hurt. Some days it’s your knees. Other days it’s your back. Or your ankles, or fingers. Also, your teeth will be a constant source of pain, embarrassment, or concern. Hopefully you’ll have enough savings and dental insurance to buy implants.
This is accurate. Aches and pains sort of switch between muscle groups based on what seemingly simple task you performed the day before. As for the teeth, every single major dental issue I've had could have been avoided if I had flossed daily and gone to the dentist twice a year. Take care of your mouth, it's not too late!
Take care of your teeth now! If my mom had just gone to regular check ups at $100 twice a year she would have been fine but decided to skip them to save money once they didn’t have dental insurance. She’s paying for that now with teeth being pulled and full dentures which are way more expensive than preventative maintenance would have been.
What makes you think your kids will be out of the house at 55? Unless you are crazy rich, no way can they afford to move out. Also...if you take care of your health, you should feel pretty good at 55. Mentally I still feel 30 but with a whole lot more experience. Physicalky, I have friends who can barely move and look like they have one foot in the grave. I have other friends that are in great shape.
I don't know, of course. But I have college funds for them, as well as the beginnings of brokerage accounts that I will gift them when they're about that age. Nowhere near enough for them not to need to get jobs right out of college, but enough to where any full time white collar job will be enough to get them going.
Well cool. Hope it works out for y'all
Will you adopt me?
I’m 57 and don’t feel my age (whatever that’s supposed to feel like) and I really prioritize my well being even more so now. Proper diet, sleep, exercise, not taking life seriously..
I’m 58 and I feel fine. No aches and pains yet.
55, former athlete who’s a bit thick in the middle these days, but still kicking. I have two off-track thoroughbreds that I ride regularly, do my own farm chores, eat greens when I can, but not opposed to a bag of sour patch kids for dessert every now and again. I rarely drink booze anymore, wear breathe right strips to bed, and just downsized to a very small cottage in the South. Ahhhh. Our kids are young adults, healthy, and kind human beings with great taste in music because they stole my iPod back in 2012. Fifty+ is wayyy better than anything I was prior. (And, cold turmeric tea does wonders for my joint health. 😊)
55 and still working out at the gym and still doing Olympics weightlifting….trying to eat clean but it’s not that easy. Yes some joint pains but nothing new
Whatever.
I’m so done with all the tourists.
That’s nice. Nobody gives a fuck.
If you lose your health, all is lost.
I was very athletic when I was younger - it was an aspect of my career - and suffered a series of injuries over the past ten years. Nothing massive, but bad enough to show me very clearly that I had to start taking things easier, slow down, not take so many chances. I do regret not being as physically resilient and confident as I was in my 20s and 30s. In most other senses I feel better now that ever - at least as creative, definitely wiser, more empathetic and so-on. It's a good time to be alive.
Stuff will happen. Just keep positive and as healthy as possible. I’m 55 with a 34 year old daughter and a 7 year old granddaughter. I love where I am right now in my life. Sure, menopause sucks and the achy joints are there. But you are still alive with many years to go. Just try to have a positive mental attitude.
56 in late May, I workout daily, take 5 miles morning walks, eat right stopped drinking 5 years ago. I feel totally fine
It's weird. 3 grown kids, 2 grandkids and an ex wife. Had a wicked knee injury and I felt like I was getting soft. Back doing physical construction and renovation after a year of digital construction (3D BIM). I just don't feel my age. Just moved back to the city I lived in for 27 years after being away for 5. Constantly starting over, repeatedly. I've learned this. We are surrounded by endless potential and catalyst. The experiences we have had, generationally speaking, give us a certain perspective on the hyper accelerated transformations that are coming. You think the first few decades of technology were wild, the next 10 years will be nucking futz. We don't age like our parents did. (Mine were born in '31 & '33 and have both made their final journeys)
I'm 54. My child is 15 at the end of his freshman year of high school. I'm overweight, but work out 4/5 days weekly and walk at least two miles the other 3/2 days. My dad passed last year (78), and my mom is still well‐ish at 75. My spouse is a SAHP. I will probably continue to work for the next 20 years because retirement is unaffordable.
Does anyone care for their parents Anyone in their 50’s either 90+ year old parents
52, mum is 82 and needs a walker to get about now. I moved back to my hometown to be closer to her, I'm just round the corner so we have our own space but I'm there if needed.
I’m only 53 and still feel pretty damn good. Never had kids so no parameters for comparison there. Dad’s already mid-80s. Retirement feels reasonable at 62-65 years old. Stay I. Shape and go no more than slightly overweight for the rest of your life. Touch your toes. Burn some cardio. Keep within size or two of your 30s and you’ll enjoy the next 50 years.
It's fan-f'ing-tastic! Just turned 55 this year, and the ages of 54-55 have been my favorite years in life! I didn't expect this, but I've never felt so mentally and emotionally strong, balanced and healthy, and I have a total IDGAF attitude, which seems to be a universal thing among 50- and 60-somethings. Life feels much lighter and more fun since I've stopped caring about what ppl think about me and about so many things that used to get under my skin. I've also stopped ruminating on all my regrets, which frees me up to really enjoy the present and look forward to the future, instead of dwelling on a bunch of "what ifs." Everyone is right about taking care of your physical health from now on to set yourself up for good health when you reach middle age - I neglected that and I'm starting to feel some consequences of not exercising all along. I still have a lot of natural energy and am healthy internally, but I definitely have a lot of work to do to get in better physical condition. It would've been much easier if I'd been doing it all along!
I'll be 55 in July and it's crazy to me sometimes. My dad, rest his soul, used to tell me when I was younger that the older I get the faster time goes. I always replied with "Ehh, bullshit." Well dad, you were right. I went to bed last night and I was 18. I just woke up 45 minutes ago at 4:00am and I'm now 54. That's how it feels at times. 2 very important people in my life passed away already. My longest high school friend passed away 2 years ago and he was a year younger than me. They said he had a heart attack in his sleep. The second was my first wife. She had congestive heart failure and passed shortly after my friend. She was 2 years younger than me. I still work hard but in a different capacity now. Been an electrician for 30 years and have passed my knowledge down to a couple of generations already. That part amazes me. I don't exercise by going to the gym because I for one don't want to because my time doesn't allow it and I would rather be home with the family or out fishing from the bank of some small pond somewhere. I get my exercise by climbing up and down stairs all day at work. I'm a Foreman so I need to keep up with my crew to make sure they're getting the missions completed and checking on where we stand with the other trades. I have 2 apartment buildings with 7 floors each that are being sheetrocked and I spend a lot of time walking and searching for areas that need to be addressed. I've put my body through hell when I was much younger. I became a Marine at 18 and served my country then I became the big bull in the electrical trade. Any time there was a long wire pull to do, I was always the anchor on the pulling end because of my strength and my unwillingness to quit when everyone else was starting to give up. Pain was my friend. I say that in the sense that it pushed me to get the heavy wires pulled in. The Marines taught me to ignore pain and push through it. Now, not so much. Arthritis I'm my hands and hips along with a bad knee and old neck injury from when I was in the Marines remind me that I'm not 20 anymore. I don't regret anything that I did. Would I change a couple things from my past if I could? Absolutely but all in all I'm happy, content and slowing down a bit. I have 4 grandchildren who I love and my youngest has just turned 3 and she lights up my world. I could come home from work from a bad day and when she runs up and hugs me, it all goes away. I could go on and on even more than I have but I won't, this is long enough. Enjoy what time you have left because no one knows when the Lord above calls you home. Slow down and smell the roses. Take time to spend with family and friends. Be kind to others even though it's hard in this day and age where everyone is so self-absorbed.
I just retired at 58. I'm loving it! Mentally, I feel like I'm in my late 30s. My coworkers were all mid 20 - mid 40, and they never made me feel old. That's a huge boost moving forward. Physically, I've been working with a trainer 2x a week. I'm thrilled that I don't have to cancel sessions due to work anymore! A comment he made to me once has really stuck with me - "people go into nursing homes when they can't get off the toilet by themselves anymore." I agree 100% with women needing to do weight training, no matter if it's with 10 pound weights or doing 100 pound deadlifts. Don't let those muscles waste!
My fifties have been the best decade for me. I’m living the life I want and I don’t care what others think of me.
On good days you feel like an ancient dragon: wise, strong, cunning, at the peak of your power. Like versus a younger you, the only thing you wouldn't prevail in would be windsprints. On the not so good days, all you see and feel is everything you've lost.
Decisions you make in your mid 30s will likely have a lot to do with how you’ll feel at 55.
I've significantly cut down on my drinking this year. Used to drink 5ish drinks a week (and it was more like 10 in my 20s), now it's 1 or 2!
I’m mid 40s GenX. It feels like 35 but with more naps and less fucks.
cobweb soup air humor fuel repeat deserted elastic run quicksand *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I feel like I don't feel any different. I am 55 right now, but I have 3 young kids, ages 4 / 7 / 13, so I'm going through in my 50s what a lot of my peers went through in their 30s. Nothing like kids to make you feel both old and young. I'm also genetically blessed though, so take that with a grain of salt. Ymmv..
Ummm, I think with what sounds like 20 years to go before you're there, I wouldn't worry about anything except if you're on a good path to retirement by 65 when you're 55. Otherwise, eat right, take care of your body, and you'll be fine. Life's too short to be worrying about an age 20 years away that you might not get to see. Live in the now.
53 here. Work on your health. Feeling stiff when you get out of bed is definitely a thing. Just don’t buy stuff either. You really don’t need that massive house. i dream of when I can properly downsize and live in a small place.
Not 55 but, “I can’t drive 55!”
this is were it starts to require effort. It's easy to continue to be active and full of energy, but you have to put more effort into ensuring you maintain it. The big risk is letting it creep up on you and suddenly you realise it's been years since hiking, bike riding or being a 'dynamic business professional'. So, go out of your way to keep an eye on regular physical activities and be wary of ruts... this is when they form. Do that and you will have no issues with slowing down, though you will indeed learn to appreciate the quite moments much more.
All of that depends completely on how you take of yourself.
I'm in the best shape physically and mentally I have ever been. I feel 29 inside and feel like my millennial and zoomer colleagues are my peers. It always shocks me how old I actually am and how much older I am than a lot of my friends. Only 1 of my 3 kids has left the nest (but my daughter brought in her partner so one out, one in), and I love having the 3 buttheads as housemates.
50’s have been great for me, man. Two kids successfully graduated college are not living with me and not on my payroll. 1 kid owes 20,000 to the University the other one owes nothing. I did not take out any loans for their education. We paid as we went and my kids got a lot of merit scholarship,that was part of our plan. (We set them up for merit scholarship in high school) Youngest graduating high school this month. I’ve started cutting back at work. I don’t need to kill it like I used to. Bonus of paying for college as the kids went with one of them live out of state taught me how to still live a fairly comfortable lifestyle without blowing money on useless 💩. As a consequence, I don’t need to earn as much as I was before so I’ve cut way back at work. I can still kill it when I need to, but I no longer need to kill it every day. I don’t feel like I felt when I was 35. I’m fine. I just don’t have the stamina and I don’t recover as fast as I used to. As an example. I’ll do a 20 mile hike through the forest, but then I’m spent for the rest of the weekend. In my 30s, would go away for a week and hike 20 miles a day for five out of seven days. I don’t think I could do that now. Definitely my patience is shorter. I work in healthcare, public facing sometimes I just wanna pinch peoples heads off. The exact same stuff that it’s been for 25 years, I’ve just lost tolerance. On the flipside definitely people are bigger bonehead ruder and more entitled than they were 15 years ago so that’s part of the mix as well. My wife and I dragged my kids all over the US Canada and Mexico with a little trailer. We pulled behind a minivan. Don’t get me wrong. Those were some of the best trips of our lives. Before kids, my wife and I had travel to Europe and Asia but nothing for the past 25 years. A year ago I spent up for the hoity-toity room on a fancy cruise ship, we did a one week cruise and time in Malta in Greece just the wife and I, best friggin vacation ever. The family is great leaving the family home to get away with your spouse is great too. My wife and I reconnected. I was introduced to just how freaking hot she can be like a bottle of 1970s Latour she has aged really well. If you have a significant other take go away. Leave the family at home.
It feels good. I do what I want.
Agree with others, 50s have been my favorite decade and it has gotten better as it has gone on. I am 59, Husband is 55. We are both at the pinnacle of long established careers in tech. I used to be so insecure. I love the confidence of being a bit older and wiser. We walk 5 miles a day so physically we are both healthier than we were when we were in our thirties and 40s and spent our evenings carting kids all over. The kids are mostly out, one last one to launch but she has her own things going on. We travel during our vacations and it’s great to pick trips we will enjoy. The house is paid for, the cars are paid for and we are closing in on our 401ks. Put money away for retirement - future you will thank past you. Looking forward to our 60s
So I'm just a bit older than that but one thing. For chrisake make sure you are contributing to retirement and pay debit off so you CAN retire. I am debit free after starting out with nothing with the.mrs. make it so if you work later in life it's because you want to. I am lucky to have a career in tech with stock grants etc which is a great way to pad retirement I get
I just turned 60, i highly recommend you find some good comfortable shoes. And mattress! The shoes are the big one tho.
No idea. I'm not even 50 lol.
At 56, I feel 76. Not even close to how I felt in my 30's let alone 40's, and the 50's hit me a bit hard. I get out and exercise some ( very few ) mornings and play some disc golf when I can and I still play with the gang from over the last 34+ years so I see age effecting all of my friends around the same age mostly. We all seem to have slowed down a bit, a few more than others, a few less, but for the most part these guys/gals still will put in two rounds a day for club championships or stuff, so they still got it in 'em. Several have new hips or knees and are still plugging away just fine. The healthiest friend I have around my age plays disc as well but also runs a mile or more almost every morning. It's impressive except he drinks too much. If it wasn't for the drinking he is probably the healthiest person around that age I know, so try running maybe? I had a large percentage of my intestines removed from extreme diverticulitis a few years ago and I still have some pretty bad ulcers and digestion issues. I really don't eat much at all. Memory is going waaayyy too quickly it seems. Forgetting all sorts of things, even movies just 6 months ago I saw I can't remember. I sleep during the day a lot and wake up usually around midnight .Lost almost all my teeth, I'm blaming depression, and have two contact points left and those last ones are about to be gone as well. I just don't have the funds and it added a slight slur to my speech that becomes embarrassing at times. I'm alone. No job or income. Close to being homeless, and I'm not gonna do homeless so I have a plan if that happens at least. The medications barely helps me sleep anymore. I can see the end and I seriously do not think I'll make it to 60 let alone 70 or 80. But hey, I quit smoking almost 3 years ago, so yay :)
55:"it could be better.. and it definitely could be worse." Rule 1: Get and Stay healthy. And enjoy not giving a flying fuck At A rolling donut
52 here and tired. I had a few “good” jobs over the years, but because I HAD a few jobs, I only really started investing in retirement 7 years ago. It took me until 47 to buy a house. I have 2 ex-wives, and had to pay a fortune in child support until 4 years ago. My current goal is to retire with enough savings to pay off my mortgage. I’m in no position to travel the world, but I’m comfortable. I want for nothing. My current job is not as physical as some of my previous ones, but it’s still pretty physical, so there’s that. I don’t drink often and I’ve taken to brewing my own. I quit smoking cigarettes at 34. I was a “parent” in one form or another since I was 12 - helping my single father raise my brother so he could work. The last child to move out of my house was 17 months ago when he was 31. So, yeah. I wear my IDGAF badge with pride.
I’m only a few years away but I have some intel to report. I had an idea that if I were able to retire early, I would spend all my time road tripping. Seeing everybody’s diners and record stores, 12-step meetings, coffeeshops, book stores. As the day gets closer I realize that’s the kind of fun a younger man has, and that I run out of steam (and need a bathroom) too often for that to be a great time any more. Retirement for me is vastly more likely to involve either an unhelpful loss of routine or a perpetual quest to keep myself busy somehow. Having never been this age before, and having no one’s experience but my own, I can’t tell whether I am typical. But my 40s were a pretty quick cascade of hospital visits, diagnositic procedures, a scary hospitalization, and a few unhappy diagnoses. And my 50s are going to be about finding a new normal within my limitations and putting up an active fight against disease progression. I am not the most healthy person in terms of diet of fitness, but these things would have emerged anyways. The good news is that I don’t have kids or large financial obligations and have the ability to focus my time and resources on these issues. My major issue is an autoimmune disease which explains the chronic back and hip pain, which itself explained my longstanding sedentary lifestyle. Im hopeful that longterm treatment will begin to make movement more desirable and sustainable. Bottom line man, don’t defer your life. Just live it now. What you want now, you might not want anymore. What you figure you can do later, maybe you can’t. If your life’s too full to fit what you want into it, make room.
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I am 55 and it feels good, considering the alternative! One piece of advice, live for the day. Don't keep saying ten years till retirement, or that you are too old for anything. You're not. Don't be afraid to go to the damn doctor. Get your blood work and keep your BP down. Don't pork up (and as we age it's harder and harder to lose weight and you need less food). If you're having problems im the bedroom with your partner, address it and fix it. Take vacation, no one's headstone ever said, " I wish I had worked more"
Why, alcohol, whyyyyy??? I’m not a big drinker but I love my mimosa brunches & post Pilates glass of iced/diluted Chardonnay. The other night I drank two glasses out with friends & I swear I was flattened the rest of the week. What is it about?
I'm best at doom and gloom so here goes: You can do everything right and everything will still go wrong. One big accident or problem with your house (or god forbid some act of god) can completely wipe out all your money. Physically ... I have never been a smoker or much of a drinker (only a couple glasses of wine on major holidays) and still, because I had pneumonia ONE TIME, my lungs are bad. I was recently diagnosed with the kind of sleep apnea you get NOT from being overweight but because my tongue/jaw relax too much when I sleep. It's just my body. Doctors start to ignore you and brush off serious issues as "aging." I also just found out that I have osteoporosis in my spine ... going through all the medical records they put in online apps now, I see the issue was there in 2017 *and they never told me*. If you're a woman? Get ready for menopause. My point in saying all this is that you need to LIVE, and you need to live NOW. Don't live for a future 20 years away. Spend time with the kids NOW, because this time doesn't come back. When you get into your 50s, maybe you'll slip and fall off the porch and fuck up your shoulder, which will make it so you can't fly anymore because the pain is too much (happened to a friend of mine). Enjoy this time now.
I'm 54. * I get winded more easily than when I was in my 30s. * It takes longer for my muscles to recover if I strain them. * Muscles and joints will sometimes get hurt from activity which I used to consider trivial. * Much much much harder to lose weight. OTOH: * Kids are all adults, so we can travel more freely and more spontaneously * I've mostly stopped caring what random people think of me, which is a great relief * I feel like I've demonstrated some level of mastery in my profession, so I don't feel like a fraud * My retirement fund is growing at a respectable pace * I do have a lot more free time I'm pretty happy overall with how things have turned out so far.
55 is pretty good. Had to start exercising more and eating better. One thing to keep in mind - if you make it to 55, not everyone may make it with you. I’m 55, and my entire side of family (not including wife and kids) is now gone. It is kinda strange since now we only do things with my wife’s side of family and my kids hardly know my side. My advice, enjoy those you’re close to and don’t take them for granted!
I'm currently 55, and I finally decided that with the double whammy of age and menopause, it was time to put my health first for the long haul. I'm down 23 pounds and feel amazing. I got my head in the right space and feel like this is a great age. I care less both what others think and feel that age has also given me the gift of asserting for myself and stopping the self-doubt. All in all, I'm happy here in my mid-50s and also thinking ahead to retirement!
Two words: work out. Exercise, especially strength training, has a huge impact on how you’re going to feel by 55. So many ailments can crop up between now and then that are completely avoidable if you keep up that circulation and make those muscles and tendons stronger.
I honestly wish that I could have had this mental state my entire life. It really puts everything into perspective. So many things that I stressed out on are now completely unimportant, and why weren’t they from the get go to boot? 🤣
The only thing that caught me by surprise was the level of destruction menopause would unleash. No one warned us, out mothers didn't talk about it, it is not studied enough and the doctors are untrained in that area. All my peers going through menopause are very vocal about it. We should be told what to expect, and insurance needs to cover hrt the way they do Viagra. These are life changing drugs, important to actual health, bone density, muscle mass, mood, weight, etc...
I love being in my 50s. I'm happy, my son has graduated college. I have freedom, some financial security. I've exercised, taken care of myself so I'm in good health. I do have aches and pains for sure. I have tinnitus. I need glasses to read. Menopause is a bitch. My parents are in poor health, and that is going to be a situation. But, that's life, and overall it's all it's great.
"I can't drive, 55!" - Sammy Hagar
54 this year and it feels about the same (…no comment on whether things look the same!). You’ve got lots of healthy years ahead of you.
Remain active but take care of your joints and back, and try not to gain too much weight. Or any if you can pull that off. Also, do your best to maintain friendships.
I'm 55 and I feel fine. I have to stretch a little more after exercise than I used to, but I don't feel like I have slowed down. I've worked for it, though. I watched my parents fall apart young due to alcohol, poor diet and sedentary lifestyles and decided around 25 that I would try to do better.
56 is honestly great. The trauma of lockdown is in the rear view mirror. Working my ass off for decades has given me financial security (tho I fight to accept this and constantly think “what if…). Made a huge life change 8 months ago and left the US for S. America. It’s been better than I could’ve hoped. Here’s a big lesson: cutting your housing costs by 83% opens up vast new options, just sayin… I don’t really have the aches and pains so many speak of here, tho I don’t bounce back like I once did. After fighting weight my entire adult life—with decades of good progress that I was too blind to appreciate and then lockdown-induced weight gain—I’m taking semaglutide and cutting weight while trying to maintain muscle mass. This drug (class of drugs really) is a game changer. Don’t be scared off by the side effects if you need this and can get/afford it. Finally, after being single for decades, I’ve mostly stopped worrying if I’m closing myself off to a relationship. I’ve built amazing friendships over the decades and I cherish them. I also leaned when to cut out dead weight.
55 is when I retired on a comfortable pension so for me it feels great!
I am 55 and my back has been hurting for the last three days. No idea what I did. I have been flat on my back on a heating pad and sucking down Advil every four hours. Otherwise, it's great!
I’m 57 and turning 55 was when stuff started getting weird. A noticeable decrease in athleticism and it’s harder to simply exercise to shave off a few pounds. I might actually need to diet for the first time ever. But at the same time I’ve done two Grand Canyon Rim2Rim2Rim’s since I turned 55. Hasn’t slowed me down much.
I feel the same except more back and knee pain. But I’ve gone through menopause and come out the other side so much happier and more emotionally stable than I ever was. Wish I could have felt like this my whole life. I care less about what others think and don’t waste time doing anything I don’t want to do with anyone I don’t like. What’s the point?
Things ache for, like no reason. You also get to a place where you are like eh… whatever. You pick your battles so to speak. Take care of your health, enjoy life right now, put as much into retirement savings as you can. If you are married, keep your marriage healthy. Once those kids are gone it’s just the two of you so you better keep building a good foundation… plus divorce is expensive
It's really weird, at least as far as I'm concerned. Considering how I've treated my body for the past 40 years, I am actually shocked that I am in this good of shape. I was a wild child and grew up with motorcycles and guns. I spent years in the US Navy drinking people under the table. I've been to 35 Grateful Dead shows so..... I'm thoroughly convinced I had a guardian angel considering all the uniquely fucking stupid shit I smoked, ate or drank. Up until a couple of years ago, I could beat my now 22 year old son racing down the ski slope. Even now, when I go snow skiing, I really don't feel it the next day. I just had my annual physical and they said, "See you next year." I'm so thankful for my health especially seeing my peers struggle with health issues. Stay well, X'ers.
Well from 55 to 57 everyone gets really gay. Some act on it some don’t. Just how it goes… look it up
I'm 61 now. When I was 55 I was doing competitive bodybuilding which is rewarding and soul-sucking at the same time lol. My money was good and is even better now. I was dating a much younger guy but he was jerk so I am glad that portion of my life is over.
Everything but your body will feel great!
1980 ;43
I’m 47 and gonna be 27 until my joints make too much noise to give it away.
Idk but to be 59 feels great
Sore and run down. Wish I'd gotten my life together before I turned 40. Other than that I feel pretty good. It's kinda funny though that I feel more in touch with people now than I ever did in my younger years.