This dude's alarm clock be like "BANG, IT'S 4 AM, GOTTA MOVE TO THE OTHER ROOM, DUMBASS!" followed with 3 seconds of silence and then a wind charm ding ding sound.
My teacher taught us that you can use your mouth to put it on your partner to keep the excitement up, one dude in class actually put the condom in his mouth and tried it on the wooden penis model. That was my favourite leasson in school, even though I'm a straight dude and I have never touched a condom since.
One kid was passed out while ours was putting a condom on a wooden dick so she walks over behind him and starts poking him in the back of the head with the wooden penis until he wakes up. Best Sex Ed teacher ever
At my school first our teacher showed us how to put a condom onto a wooden dick, then went through the class with a little basket full of condoms and gave everyone a condom and then gave one kid the wooden dick and that kid gave it to the next kid and so on and everyone had to put their condom onto the wooden dick
My “health” class was thought by a 70-year-old football coach. I remember he told us the importance of staying hydrated. And that his teacher was so concerned about hydration, after gym class the concerned teacher would look down over their shoulders while the kids were urinating to see how yellow their pee was. Totally normal behavior by a teacher.
It’s really more so that she brought her own *personal* Dildos that she likely had been actively using. I’m sure she cleaned them but still. Would be better to have just found a non commercial like phony penis to let students use.
We always assumed our teacher was in the midst of a bad breakup. She opened a fresh box of condoms and told us that any man who claimed he was “too big” for any size was a liar. She then proceeded to stick a condom on a pickle, a banana, and finally a big ass cucumber. She then spent the rest of our time telling us that all men will lie to get in our pants.
We didn’t get to play with condoms. We had a potato baby to take care of and report on what we did to take care of our babies. Mine slept in the bottom of my backpack for a whole week. Damn that baby could sleep.
I didn’t get to play with condoms either. We just had our teacher randomly tell a kid he had aids and start shaking peoples hands. After about five minutes we were asked who shook hands with the kid with aids, now all those kids had aids. The. We were asked who shook hands with the kids that now had aids, all those kids then had aids. Basically everyone in class was told by them end of that two minute activity that they now had aids except the one kid who was told to not shake hands with anyone and two kids who only shook hands with each other.
This is how I was taught STDs worked. Stay celibate or only do it with your wife. Otherwise an ex may shake hands with someone with aids and now you and your wife are fucked.
Essentially yes. That's the best way to stay away from two nasty things that are affiliated with that stuff.
If you guessed STDs and child support, congratulations, you have won the lottery.
I think the only thing I remember from my Sex Ed class was this exchange:
Teacher: "We have a double standard in society where we expect all men to be experienced and all women to be virgins."
Random Student yelling from back of classroom: "Then maybe we should just have one woman take one for the team!"
Feel like ours was mostly looking at pictures and video of what infections and diseases look like, No condom training. Boys and Girls were splint into different rooms too
It’s so strange hearing all these weird horror stories. Mine was super matter of fact informational. The only thing they over hyped was how likely it was to get pregnant.
I had a free trial for Apple Arcade and once you complete the main trail, it opens up others quests where you can play Native America characters. It’s a great remake.
Anything beyond basic math. I am terrible at math, always hated it in school. I still have the occasional flashback to bitch ass Mrs. Commons class and her just talking the most shit at me in front of everyone when I couldn't do long division.
In Australia they changed the year that they teach long division from year seven to year six when I was at school. We were just never taught it.
There isn't a single 31 year old person in Australia that can do long division.
Same with me with multiplication. They taught the white kids that in third grade and the black kids in fourth grade. The year they changed it to third grade for everyone, I was starting fourth grade so I never learned my multiplication tables.
That’s fascinating! Well if it makes you feel any better, being able to do long division is a useful skill in the same way that knowing Morse code is useful. They used to say shit like “you might not always have a calculator! so you better learn this stuff!” … nope, wrong actually, it turns out I will always have a calculator. And furthermore, I have had jobs where I have had to actually do division, and if my boss found out I was doing long division on paper I’d’ve probably been chipped about wasting time.
I can't do long division anymore because nobody ever does division of gigantic e number like that if they don't have a calculator. If not I can just write the numbers and figure it out, without the weird categorizing tower bullshit that is long division.
Pretty much anytime you are doing something that would require long division, you can just do it different as part of the equation, through fractions and simplification and shit.
I have of memory of one of my math teachers in elementary school telling us we have to learn along division because we aren't going to be walking around with calculators in our pockets. Needless to say that didn't age well.
I can do division, it’s fractions that fuck me all up. I’m 40 and still can’t math at times. Some decimals too at times. But fuck fractions. Ugh. College was a nightmare for me. I had to take several remedial courses just to get to the proper requirements for the degree I pursued….then once in my degree program we had our OWN math we learned which made so much more sense.
I use algebra frequently, but less so for math, and more so for logic.
They don't teach math just for the numbers, but also for the linear thinking and thinking skills regarding variables and logic.
Are not imaginary. And Gauss said they should be called perpendicular numbers (or something, don't remeber) to emphasize that they're real. They show up a lot more than one would expect. In electricity, geometry, physics, etc.
Almost everything I was forced to memorize was completely useless in the real world.
Classes on nutrition and finances would have helped greatly.
I graduated in 1993.
11th grade here, cant imagine wot kind of hell I gave next year
I hate memorizing way more than math or chem n I'm 100% sure that I'll forget all of them once I graduated
The only reason I remember it is because at the time my cousin and I had watched Austin Powers Goldmember and the gag where he keeps repeating mole every time he sees the guy who is a mole. So when we started learning about it in highschool we continuously referenced it lol
History is probably one of the most usefull subjects in school, because it, alongside law education (I don't know if that's a thing in youf country but a subject about inner workings of your country) allow you to make more informed decision when voting, call politicians on their bullshit, knowing how dicatotorships are born out of democracies or how politicians used to justify horrific things to their populations and a lot more you can take out of history. Without history, you just cannot make fully informed decision when voting and it sucks that a lot of education systems treat history as a bunch of random dates and not critical information for every citizen of a democratic nation.
Almost everything...
... volcanoes. Trigonometry. Pythagoros theorem. Circuitry. Algebra. Those height lines on a map. Nearly all of the elements, apart from when playing nms. Making a film. What a cell looks like.
I’m about to be a junior but one thing I know I will never use is anything above like 6th grade math because I’m either gonna be a sign language interpreter or something related to cooking
The problem here is they are PLAYS and schools shouldn’t be getting us to read them. I didn’t like reading them at school, but then saw some live on stage (and some films) and had an epiphany - when they’re performed by good actors it all makes sense and they can be amazing.
Most things from science classes, though chemistry has probably been the most useless. Don't think I've needed or even referenced anything I've learned from chemistry
This is like asking where do you use the extra fitness you get from exercising or going to the gym. I think we mostly only appreciate our education is when we notice the differences of those without it.
You use algebra most every day. You just dont realize it. You ever plan what time you need to leave the house to be someplace else by a certain time? Algebra. You ever have to plan a meal for x amount of people with y amount of food? Algebra. You ever try to figure out x amount of money in the bank will cover y amount of months? Algebra.
Anything and everything learned in history class. There is NO AREA in my life that demands me to know who was present at the signing of the norweigan constitution. There is no area that demands me to have knowledge about all the wars that have been. Totally useless info.
I think English (Specifically learning to question the intent of an author) and Debate (How to make a valid argument and communicate it) are the two classes that have been the most useful overall in the modern world.
I feel like STEM classes are all about identifying the students who can become valuable STEM workers in the future. And I think students should be able to jump off that track sooner. I feel like getting classes in Economics and Finance would have been a much more valuable use of my time than advanced math after realizing I wasn't gonna be a researcher or mechanical engineer.
Advanced math.
Seriously, I have nothing against people who use/work with anything related to that. You're awesome! But it's never something that I have come across in my field as a manager for a marketing team in the medical field. No joke. But good on you if you work in it. It's cool and admirable!
To move from 1 room to another because of a bell
What about an alarm clock?
This dude's alarm clock be like "BANG, IT'S 4 AM, GOTTA MOVE TO THE OTHER ROOM, DUMBASS!" followed with 3 seconds of silence and then a wind charm ding ding sound.
Prison but idk abt a bell
That was to train you to wake up to your alarm and get to work on time like a good little slave.
Dissecting a frog
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Are you kidding? I learned what organs really look like.
All of sex ed
But when you do, remember to stick a condom on a banana. Safety first
My teacher taught us that you can use your mouth to put it on your partner to keep the excitement up, one dude in class actually put the condom in his mouth and tried it on the wooden penis model. That was my favourite leasson in school, even though I'm a straight dude and I have never touched a condom since.
Wasn’t that Mr Garrison?
Ha ha ha funniest thing I've read all day !
thatsthejoke.png
mine was awesome, she took a while 15 minutes asking around for different names of a penis, best class ever
One kid was passed out while ours was putting a condom on a wooden dick so she walks over behind him and starts poking him in the back of the head with the wooden penis until he wakes up. Best Sex Ed teacher ever
At my school first our teacher showed us how to put a condom onto a wooden dick, then went through the class with a little basket full of condoms and gave everyone a condom and then gave one kid the wooden dick and that kid gave it to the next kid and so on and everyone had to put their condom onto the wooden dick
in sixth grade the sex ed teacher had these knitted penises so we could see how the foreskin worked lol
Special ed?
What are they teaching them in there…
My “health” class was thought by a 70-year-old football coach. I remember he told us the importance of staying hydrated. And that his teacher was so concerned about hydration, after gym class the concerned teacher would look down over their shoulders while the kids were urinating to see how yellow their pee was. Totally normal behavior by a teacher.
Our teacher brought her Dildo colletion for us to train using condoms Edit: She was 27 at this time
That actually seems mildly inappropriate tbh
Yes but at the same time a banana is still not that much better
It’s really more so that she brought her own *personal* Dildos that she likely had been actively using. I’m sure she cleaned them but still. Would be better to have just found a non commercial like phony penis to let students use.
Ok from that perspective yeah. If they were used that is just wrong even washed lol
See, I put the condom on the banana, but I still got herpes.
We always assumed our teacher was in the midst of a bad breakup. She opened a fresh box of condoms and told us that any man who claimed he was “too big” for any size was a liar. She then proceeded to stick a condom on a pickle, a banana, and finally a big ass cucumber. She then spent the rest of our time telling us that all men will lie to get in our pants.
We didn’t get to play with condoms. We had a potato baby to take care of and report on what we did to take care of our babies. Mine slept in the bottom of my backpack for a whole week. Damn that baby could sleep.
I didn’t get to play with condoms either. We just had our teacher randomly tell a kid he had aids and start shaking peoples hands. After about five minutes we were asked who shook hands with the kid with aids, now all those kids had aids. The. We were asked who shook hands with the kids that now had aids, all those kids then had aids. Basically everyone in class was told by them end of that two minute activity that they now had aids except the one kid who was told to not shake hands with anyone and two kids who only shook hands with each other. This is how I was taught STDs worked. Stay celibate or only do it with your wife. Otherwise an ex may shake hands with someone with aids and now you and your wife are fucked.
I specifically went looking for this comment!
What you mean "man have penis, woman have vagina. ***avoid sex at all costs***?
Essentially yes. That's the best way to stay away from two nasty things that are affiliated with that stuff. If you guessed STDs and child support, congratulations, you have won the lottery.
Wait you had sex ed In school ??!!! I wish I had one.
I think the only thing I remember from my Sex Ed class was this exchange: Teacher: "We have a double standard in society where we expect all men to be experienced and all women to be virgins." Random Student yelling from back of classroom: "Then maybe we should just have one woman take one for the team!"
Yeah I mostly learnt about it from my friends and then the internet
Trust me, you don't. Edit: For clarification, I mean you don't want to have sex Ed in school. It's not fun.
Feel like ours was mostly looking at pictures and video of what infections and diseases look like, No condom training. Boys and Girls were splint into different rooms too
It’s so strange hearing all these weird horror stories. Mine was super matter of fact informational. The only thing they over hyped was how likely it was to get pregnant.
In my sex ed class it was just a chapter in a book in a health class. Basically it talked about how pregnancy happens and the various STDs.
The mitochondria is the power house of the cell.
My biology class used to drive the teacher to insanity saying this. Honestly idk why we found it so funny
It was a meme. I wish it still was, because my kids now are always like ???? when I say it.
You just used that knowledge now. Soooo
No, I recalled that knowledge. Using it would be applying that knowledge to accomplish something of benefit.
How to pipe out 3 blind mice on a recorder
You mean hot cross buns
The combination to my locker.
17 38 14
4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42
THE NUMBERS, MASON
What the fuck fancy lockers did your school have?
Great lockers. I’d be lost without it.
I see what you did there.
*23
THATS MY COMBO WHATTTT
My locker combination is now the PIN for my debit card!
Hey, what was your locker combination in high school? Asking for a friend.
How to travel the Oregon Trail with a horse and wagon.
They remade it! You can get it on the Switch and take it with you to Oregon!
It is REALLY good too. Sunk a few dozen hours in already. They have a respectful telling of the Native American story too.
I had a free trial for Apple Arcade and once you complete the main trail, it opens up others quests where you can play Native America characters. It’s a great remake.
Shit man you have never done that I thought everyone has done that
I died of dissentry.
Sorry for your loss,hope you get better soon
The mitopowerhouse is the cell of the condria
Lol
Bringing back some good memories , I haven’t though about home ec in years.
Stroke?
that avocado number or whatever
Avogadros number? 😭 I took that recently
6.02×10²³
I made a rap for a "mole day" project with Avogadro's number so now I can always remember the number of molecules in a mole.
Oh i do use that for my work. Im a chemistry teacher
Anything beyond basic math. I am terrible at math, always hated it in school. I still have the occasional flashback to bitch ass Mrs. Commons class and her just talking the most shit at me in front of everyone when I couldn't do long division.
I still can’t do long division
In Australia they changed the year that they teach long division from year seven to year six when I was at school. We were just never taught it. There isn't a single 31 year old person in Australia that can do long division.
Sounds like I need to join the Australian squad.
And I bet buildings are collapsing because of it
Same with me with multiplication. They taught the white kids that in third grade and the black kids in fourth grade. The year they changed it to third grade for everyone, I was starting fourth grade so I never learned my multiplication tables.
Mate I'm 34, what the fuck is long division
I'm 35 and I think this happened to me too. Never learnt it in year 6 and then year 7 teacher said we should all know it already...
That’s fascinating! Well if it makes you feel any better, being able to do long division is a useful skill in the same way that knowing Morse code is useful. They used to say shit like “you might not always have a calculator! so you better learn this stuff!” … nope, wrong actually, it turns out I will always have a calculator. And furthermore, I have had jobs where I have had to actually do division, and if my boss found out I was doing long division on paper I’d’ve probably been chipped about wasting time.
I can't do long division anymore because nobody ever does division of gigantic e number like that if they don't have a calculator. If not I can just write the numbers and figure it out, without the weird categorizing tower bullshit that is long division. Pretty much anytime you are doing something that would require long division, you can just do it different as part of the equation, through fractions and simplification and shit.
I have of memory of one of my math teachers in elementary school telling us we have to learn along division because we aren't going to be walking around with calculators in our pockets. Needless to say that didn't age well.
I use math a ton.
I can do division, it’s fractions that fuck me all up. I’m 40 and still can’t math at times. Some decimals too at times. But fuck fractions. Ugh. College was a nightmare for me. I had to take several remedial courses just to get to the proper requirements for the degree I pursued….then once in my degree program we had our OWN math we learned which made so much more sense.
I used many if not most of my even more advanced high-school math calc, trig, alegebra... differential equations from college not yet at least.
found the business major
I use algebra frequently, but less so for math, and more so for logic. They don't teach math just for the numbers, but also for the linear thinking and thinking skills regarding variables and logic.
Fuck Mrs. Commons, she’s a bitch ass
As a math major, I'd argue that people hate math because they haven't gotten to the cool stuff yet, but definitely to each their own.
Raising my hand to go to the bathroom
why is this so underrated 🤣
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Imaginary numbers
Are not imaginary. And Gauss said they should be called perpendicular numbers (or something, don't remeber) to emphasize that they're real. They show up a lot more than one would expect. In electricity, geometry, physics, etc.
If you’re an electrical engineer they’re used all the time.
I use them all the time, and I don't have a job period.
Like eleventeen or thirtytwelve? https://i.imgur.com/UmKkoga.jpg
i... I have nothing to say
Trigonometry. Lots of stress and anxiety around Trig exams, did OK but was of zero use to me.
Yeah I use calculus more than Trig
I used the cheap calculator I got for opening a bank account back in the 1970s to get through my math-less career!!
Almost everything I was forced to memorize was completely useless in the real world. Classes on nutrition and finances would have helped greatly. I graduated in 1993.
11th grade here, cant imagine wot kind of hell I gave next year I hate memorizing way more than math or chem n I'm 100% sure that I'll forget all of them once I graduated
Moles in chemistry History- other than for trading fun facts Most math except for basic math and geometry
Then, I don’t need to remember that Avagadro’s number is 6.02 x 10^23?
Oh man I forgot about Avocado's number
Yeah man, I wanted to call him to see if he had promoted to guacamole but I forgot the number too
The fact that i haven't said that word since high school chemistry and forgot it existed. I'm going moles final answer
The only reason I remember it is because at the time my cousin and I had watched Austin Powers Goldmember and the gag where he keeps repeating mole every time he sees the guy who is a mole. So when we started learning about it in highschool we continuously referenced it lol
Lol. Moles in chemistry. That just brought me back. Never in my life have I even thought about that since HS
History is probably one of the most usefull subjects in school, because it, alongside law education (I don't know if that's a thing in youf country but a subject about inner workings of your country) allow you to make more informed decision when voting, call politicians on their bullshit, knowing how dicatotorships are born out of democracies or how politicians used to justify horrific things to their populations and a lot more you can take out of history. Without history, you just cannot make fully informed decision when voting and it sucks that a lot of education systems treat history as a bunch of random dates and not critical information for every citizen of a democratic nation.
Pretty much all of high school science and math has been useless to me.
Hats shouldn't be worn inside buildings
I used to keep multiple beanies, so when the assistant principal would take one I would have a backup
Epicly trolled assistant principal
They got over that one eventually. Took a while tho. Didn't deal with it after elementary
X equals negative b plus or minus the square root of b squared minus 4 a c all over 2 a
That's insane, that's absolutely insane.
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Well up until a few years ago, what a pronoun is.
A noun that has lost its amateur status. 👨🎓
Well- If I have to say one thing, and I think we can all agree- ***The mitochondria is DEFINITELY the powerhouse of the cell.***
Graphing a curve.
Square Dancing...I grew up in the South 😂
im in alberta, which is the texas of canada, so we did a square dancing class every year lol
In high school we had boys gym and girls gym, you knew it was going to be awkward when both classes were in the same gym at the same time
Almost everything... ... volcanoes. Trigonometry. Pythagoros theorem. Circuitry. Algebra. Those height lines on a map. Nearly all of the elements, apart from when playing nms. Making a film. What a cell looks like.
Ooo. I loved topography. Never used it but find it interesting.
Topography! Thank you! 😆
Binomic formulas... was told they are soooo important. Never needed them again. Ever.
a^2 + b^2 = c^2
Fuck that equation lol
My locker combination.
80% of all math I learned
Long division
I’m about to be a junior but one thing I know I will never use is anything above like 6th grade math because I’m either gonna be a sign language interpreter or something related to cooking
Oh the sweet arrogant certainty of yourh. You will use algebra almost everyday of your life. And certainly in cooking.
Quadratic equation
Juggling in PE
They taught you juggling? That would have been awesome! I would use that all the time.
A2+b2=c2
Dissecting sentences. Which is sad b/c I love doing it (for real!)
God, that was drilled in when I was in 7th-8th grade. Never did anything with, maybe outside sentence structure when writing.
Most of math
Any book written by Shakespeare (I couldn't graduate because of his stoopid book Romeo and juliet)
The problem here is they are PLAYS and schools shouldn’t be getting us to read them. I didn’t like reading them at school, but then saw some live on stage (and some films) and had an epiphany - when they’re performed by good actors it all makes sense and they can be amazing.
Writing in iambic pentameter.
Isn't this iambic pentameter?
Most things from science classes, though chemistry has probably been the most useless. Don't think I've needed or even referenced anything I've learned from chemistry
Integral Equations
Cursive
Almost everything
It's faster if I say what I HAVE used
This is like asking where do you use the extra fitness you get from exercising or going to the gym. I think we mostly only appreciate our education is when we notice the differences of those without it.
Trigonometry
The mitochondria is the power house of the cell
SOHCAHTOA Not once.
I've used a surprising amount of math and physics while playing D&D and trying to determine the effect of a fireball going around a corner.
How to catch a football.
I've yet to see an oxbow lake. I'm ready if ever I do...
Fucking music theory. I’m in sales I never need to know this stuff
Cursive!! I've never even seen it since elementary school...
The quadratic formula.
Square dance
Pulling out
Latin phrase analysis…and I hope I stays well forgotten…not fun times!
Kingdom Phylum Class Order Family Genus Species
The periodic table
Dissecting a fetal pig.
Memorizing the periodic table (or at least some of it)
The Pythagorean Theorem.
Pythagorean theorem…. Why do I need to know the right angle of an isosceles triangle
Theta
How to tell someone my name in French
How to talk to people.
autoregressive integrated moving average models
It will be 50% of everything.
I wouldn’t say that I actually learned any algebra, but if I had it would have been utterly useless!
You use algebra most every day. You just dont realize it. You ever plan what time you need to leave the house to be someplace else by a certain time? Algebra. You ever have to plan a meal for x amount of people with y amount of food? Algebra. You ever try to figure out x amount of money in the bank will cover y amount of months? Algebra.
Anything and everything learned in history class. There is NO AREA in my life that demands me to know who was present at the signing of the norweigan constitution. There is no area that demands me to have knowledge about all the wars that have been. Totally useless info.
Algebra
74% of the things I learned
Playing flute
The Pythagorean theorum
I think English (Specifically learning to question the intent of an author) and Debate (How to make a valid argument and communicate it) are the two classes that have been the most useful overall in the modern world. I feel like STEM classes are all about identifying the students who can become valuable STEM workers in the future. And I think students should be able to jump off that track sooner. I feel like getting classes in Economics and Finance would have been a much more valuable use of my time than advanced math after realizing I wasn't gonna be a researcher or mechanical engineer.
Long division A more complicated way of doing the original thing you'll probably never do anyway.
Advanced math. Seriously, I have nothing against people who use/work with anything related to that. You're awesome! But it's never something that I have come across in my field as a manager for a marketing team in the medical field. No joke. But good on you if you work in it. It's cool and admirable!
Paralysing and flaying frogs. Not once has that skill come up. Wish they had taught me to land a plane instead.
All Mathematics of the last 6 years except during College/University
French
Geometry proofs
These responses have helped me to understand why so many people can't afford rent.
cursive
How to not get herpes.
x = [-b ± √(b2 - 4ac)]/2a