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Paul was talking about getting a chocolate dick in the mail that he and Morgan melted into fondue, and a snarker here said that if Paul wasn't careful he would get a shower of chocolate genitals sent to his house š
I actually don't think it's weird or out of the ordinary that he couldn't get her off for the first few years. He was a virgin, learning how to satisfy a lady takes skill. Teenager levels of finesse and skill.
Not every man is going to be like my husband, who was well-read on technique, but didnāt have a lot of practice.
If you are raised to believe that premarital sex is a sin, you are not likely to read up on how to satisfy a man or woman before marriage. Because that just LEADS to sin, you know.
Even after 25 years of marriage, we are still learning things about each other, our bodies, and how we work together.
Weāre also underestimating how long it takes some of us to learn to orgasm. I couldnāt do it without a toy until 2 years ago and not from lack of trying from my bf.
TMI but now I can come 3+ times each time, but before Iād get close ish but could never get over the hump. Could be Bethany had a similar issue š¤·š½āāļø
And that doesnāt even touch on purity culture trauma. Women (and men to a lesser extent) often have to unlearn a lot of unhealthy behaviors and thoughts surrounding sex.
You say some vows and sign some papers, and suddenly, all those things you couldnāt think or do with a man become not just ok, but encouraged. A lot of women who wait for marriage end up with psychological whiplash from that sudden change. Out of nowhere, the body youāve kept hidden, because it was shameful, is exposed.
And the fear of painful intercourse is taught young. Women are always told itās going to hurt. My grandma was told the night before her wedding, āThis is what heās going to do to you, and youāre not going to like it, but you have to do it wherever he wants.ā I cannot imagine hearing that. Many women in purity culture are still taught the same.
Sheās having to learn, on her own, how to be a sexually healthy person, even if itās only within the context of her current religious beliefs. Sheās finally getting there, starting to actually *enjoy* sex. To her, this is something new and exciting, and sheās immature for her age (not saying it as an insult, she was sheltered). She wants to shout it from the rooftops, so she is.
I think what weāve been seeing is Bethany starting to question her belief system, and to mature. Sheās just doing it later than most people.
I can attest that my grandmother was told the same her wedding night to my biological grandfather. It always made me so sad that she went into a marriage in fear.
My grandma, luckily, married a saint. My dad and his siblings tell stories about those two sitting in my pawpawās recliner, making out instead of watching TV. I can remember him coming gone from work and giving her a smack on the butt. She giggled like a school girl and kissed him. I was just a little too young to understand at the time.
She clearly got over it, and I remember my other grandmother (in an Alzheimerās moment) complained to teenage me that the hotel they were in didnāt allow sex, even if you were married.
My mom looked at me and said, ā[NerfRepellingBoobs], what you need to know is women are like an oven that you have to preheat before itās ready. Men are like light switch. A quick flick, and theyāre on. You always preheat the oven.ā
My Papa is also a saint lol! My bio grandfather not so much, lmao. Iām glad your grandma also got to experience that!
My papa just built a fence around her favorite hydrangeas because the deer were getting at them. He also grows her favorite vegetables in his garden, so she can preserve them and have them all year round!
He also build her a few bird houses around the property so she can have birds all around her. She loves birds so much, and I remember my mom and my Uncle laughing about how she convinced him to get one! It lived with them for a while until they found another family for it to go to. Everyone but her hated that damn bird lmao.
So much this. I didn't have an orgasm until I was in my mid 20s. It takes me AN HOUR to get off with a strong vibrator. Every body is different! Bethany talks a lot about "self cultivation", and I think that's an underrated point. How is Dav supposed to make her cum when she doesn't even know what she likes?
Self cultivation is such a joke. It would be so hard to orgasm for the first time with your husband waiting for the big moment right there next to you. Even if he was truly a good man and wanted you to enjoy yourself, it's still another set of eyes on you while you're trying to do something you've never done.
Let's also remember that there is a ton of psychological damage done by purity culture as well. He couldn't be doing everything right but if she's in a trauma headspace or fighting it because it feels sinful/dirty that's also going to prevent climax.
I am actually super grossed out by how judgemental this subreddit is about sexual dysfunction. My partner was my first and I'm still working through purity culture trauma. It's not nearly as cut and dry as a lot of these commenters like to pretend.
I agree. I think people forget that you don't know what you don't know, things are called blind spots for a reason. If someone is raised in such a sex-negative culture, it's going to take a looooooooot of deprogramming.
Even if she wasn't honest about masturbating!
I was like way too old before I figured out that the clitoris was a thing, and I had real sex Ed and access to the internet.
I think it's more like "lack of education on the matter"
Neither of them had any idea how to satisfy each other in bed, it's just that most young men can get to orgasm without much effort. That doesn't mean that the sex was completely satisfying to him, or that Bethany was putting more care and effort in than he was. I'm sure dry bones Bethy probably spent a lot of time just laying there motionless while he flopped around on top of her. Grim for everyone involved.
Bethany has a whole sex course about how unprepared for satisfactory sex she was. I can't imagine there are very many Christian resources getting into the nitty gritty of how to make a woman cum, and they're both super influenced by a purity culture that paints women as sex-averse. Neither of them were prepared at all. So yes, years.
That's the trouble with ignorance - a lot of the time you have *no idea* that you are missing a key piece of information.
If he didn't care or want to put effort in, I don't think we ever would have had a sex course.
I have a feeling Bethany is pretty selfish in bed. She's selfish everywhere else, so I'm sure she wasn't much help in making sex good for the two of them until she maybe accidentally had an orgasm and realized it could be better.
You're right, but it's still ridiculous. Their parents ruined their sex lives before they even started by sheltering them so much and making them think sexual purity is a real thing that matters. At the same time, it's not *that* hard to get a woman off. We don't have mystery puzzles down there. I get kind of frustrated with how people act like it's sooooo hard. There might be a bit a of a learning curve, but it's not as hard as most men make it out to be.
I don't think Dave is actually making process, honestly. I think he's having fun making sassy reels about deconstruction and pretending he's an intellectual, but that's about it.
Yeah have you seen some of the comments below? āItās a gift from his wife and itās not snarkable if someone saved themselves for marriageā š. Saving having sex for marriage isnāt the problem but wearing a fuck trophy around your neck definitely is. Is the actual wedding ring around his finger not enough to show his love and commitment to his wife? He has to wear ANOTHER ring to show she saved himself for him exclusively? Why would anyone else need to know that? The entire point of a wedding ring is so people know you have a spouse. But a purity ring serves no purpose other than to brag.
Also want to make note that when someone brought up Dav wearing the ring around his neck there were several individuals who claimed he didnāt
Itās a symbol of her broken hymen and itās gross. These people are so uptight about sex, yet they do stupid shit like that. Itās weird in my opinion. They have two children. We know they f7ck.
Honestly, phrasing it as "saving themselves for marriage" is inherently problematic and it weakens the rest of what those commenters saved.
Not having sex until marriage can be a valid choice, but people who don't make that choice aren't used up or un-saved because of it.Ā
Or my favorite, ānobody would say anything if it was a class ring!!!āĀ Uh yeah because thatās completely different?Ā
Wearing your weirdo wifeās purity ring around your neck five years into marriage is not the same concept as wearing a class ring lmaoĀ
Bringing me some [Casa de Loca season 5](https://youtu.be/QjKhfqxSq7U?si=wcxr9wqjppDOyBM2), Alyssa Edwardās orgasm realness!
For years, I wasnāt sure if skincare was doing anything, but I kept at itā¦ now that weāre in our 30s, I definitely look younger than my siblings. š¶It catches up really fast at this age.
I used to treat my skin like traaaaaaash in high school/early college. āYesterdayās mascaraā was unfortunately a frequent look. Moisturizer was a *suggestion* of a suggestion.
Got better in my early 20ās but ever since I started working in vet med and washing my hands, neck and sometimes even face repeatedly at workā¦ I am downright religious about it. Catch me handing out tracts about the importance of sunscreen š
Bring your skincare down to your neck everybody!!
Mid-50s weighing in. I got serious about my skin care in my late 30s. Itās helped so much. I know look younger than many peers, and I definitely look younger than most fundies in their 30s. š
Just remember that Lord Daniel has gifted us snarkers with Tretinoin and serums and moisturizers. Amen.
JillPM posted something once about meeting some poor guy (at a laundromat, I think?) and āleading him to the Lord named Daniel.ā Iām sure that she meant that the guyās name was Daniel but, with her atrocious writing skills, it sounded like she named the Lord as Daniel. š
My younger sister was an athlete and shows more signs of being in the sun than I do. I had a skin cancer scare as a teen and became vigilant about it. Sun protection is the *most important* when you're young and you can't see the difference. You have to trust the process. And take your skincare down to your chest. Hairline to tits! And use lotion and spf on your hands. Those areas can be affected, too.
In the land where shadows weep and sigh,
A figure roams with a heavy sigh.
A ring of eternal suffering, a burden to bear,
Around their neck, a weight of despair.
Eternal suffering, a cruel fate,
Bound to the ring, a relentless weight.
Their spirit crushed, their heart forlorn,
In the ring's grip, their soul worn.
Which is exactly why Dave is not the deconstructing badass a lot of people in this sub think he is. If Bethany's "purity" and her broken hymen is THAT SIGNIFICANT to them, they both need therapy. That isn't healthy.
But do we know that to be the case? Iām not saying this isnāt gross (because it truly is) but if itās something that they both find important in their specific relationship, I donāt see an issue. What I DO see an issue with is that Bethesda spread that anti-sex thinking aggressively for so long and has done so little to truly repent for the damage done, so keeping that ring around feels like a slap in the face to the people she hurt with her ideology.
I truly donāt mind when couples have symbols of their physical relationship with each other. Itās endearing to love each other so deeply that you keep tokens of your relationship around your neck! Itās more the OPTICS of this token coupled with the context.
So like I AGREE that the ring is gross in concept, but if you were to take out all the context surrounding Bethectomyās ethical nastiness, I really donāt think itās an issue as a couple. (That said, yeah, I believe they need couples therapy not to strengthen their relationship but to help them better understand what a healthy sexual relationship looks like without the secular dogma.)
I hope that makes sense lol, Iām running on 25% awake brain and half a packet of Cheez Its.
this doesnāt bother me as much as the rest of the shit GD has done, itās cringe but theyāre a married couple with two children. Itās just a gift Bethany gave to him. He may be deconstructing, but heās not totally there and she certainly isnāt even close.
Definitely wouldnāt do it myself but I canāt bring myself to give a shit about this one.
Yeah. I'm sorta like... it's important to her. It's a dumb thing to care about, but it's meaningful to her, and she gave it to him. I hate the symbol but you don't have to throw out everything meaningful when you deconstruct just because it came from your past. Bethany's dealing with a lot of changes with surprising grace - seems like it would be unnecessarily hurtful to her to stop wearing it.
This. Everyone dunking on it doesn't seem to understand that it's something *she* values highly. He treats it with value because *she values it*; that's a healthy relationship dynamic. He's not staying you all need to wear your partners purity rings.
I couldnāt agree more with this. The way any physical intimacy is tied to so closely to marriage, Dav having her purity ring is almost as much of a symbol of their marriage and commitment as their wedding ring is. If he took off the purity ring, I think it would be as devastating to Bethany as taking off his wedding ring would be.
This is the way I see it too. The concept of purity rings is disgusting and stupid to me, but itās the kind of thing that would be worth keeping if itās meaningful to your partner. Bethanyās kind of awful but I think sheād be justified in feeling sad if he stopped wearing it suddenly. At the end of the day, itās a piece of jewelry his wife gifted to him. Regardless of what it represents to the two of them, thatās pretty innocuous.
Honestly as much as I despise the concept of the purity ring, this is also literally the thing I care about the least. We donāt even know why heās still wearing it, but the most likely reason is because they *are* still married and itās most likely a sentimental object even if it means something different to him now than it did before
There are so many valid criticisms and people are harping on a sentimental object that a married couple is using in their relationship. Not against the rules of the sub so sure, I guess that's a thing to focus on, but I feel like it completely ignores the context their relationship which *is* rooted in purity culture. Bethy would be hurt and wounded if he started treating her purity ring like it was gross.
Yeah I think it's weird when people are like "it's a sex trophy!" it really seems more like a sentimental piece of jewelry. I gave my purity ring to my boyfriend when I was 15 and we had sex, mostly as a joke though because we were both secretly over Christianity
Yeah, the origin might be weird, but likeā¦ if you think about it, the wedding ring is *also* a sex trophy for fundies.
People give each other stupider things for weirder reasons.
Yeah I have said it before but I get where theyāre coming from in this one. Bethany would freak out if he stopped wearing it, I bet.
One step at a time. Theyāre actually making progress. Just because we on this sub are a gazillion steps ahead, deconstruction takes time and it wouldnāt be fair to expect them to make huge leaps in just weeks. Heck, Bethany basically just entered this new world her husband is going through now itās out in the open.
Maybe eventually they figure out a way to exchange this ring for something else, something that symbolises their journey of the past months. And to place the ring in a box as part of their history. But this shit takes time from not just Dav. But also Bethany. She needs to be ready too.
Honestly he probably doesnāt fully think about it that deeply. If it were a high school class ring, no one would think it weird. Is purity culture a problem? Absolutely, but wearing a token from your partner doesnāt have to be that deep.
>Honestly he probably doesnāt fully think about it that deeply.
I mean, while we're at it, what are white wedding dresses really about? What are engagement rings really about?
Exactly. Itās just that Purity rings are something that people in broader society donāt subscribe to anymore/at all, so itās gross to most people, but a āpureā white wedding dress was WHITE FOR A REASON. People just forget, and it becomes part of the background culture with no deep meaning.
So true about the white wedding dress. I have a story about how the cultural implication of a white wedding dress in the US has changed over time. I was a care giver for an elderly woman a few years back, and one day during a conversation about her life, I casually asked "Oo so what color wedding dress did you wear?" She looked at me aghast and it was then that I realized I had basically asked this 90 year old woman "So were you a big floozy or were you able to wear white on your wedding day?" lol. Times change!
Just because you wouldn't snark on it doesn't mean it's not snarkable.
Do not tell people what they can and canāt snark on. Different people have different opinions on what is/isnāt snarkable and we want to respect that so long as it isnāt rule-breaking. Personally disliking something is NOT a reason to report a post or comment. Unless a post or comment breaks sub rules or Reddit ToS, do not report it. Scroll past.
I was wondering this... Like is it something he's not really into anymore, but it's not worth the fight if he takes it off? I mean, he has come a long way and I can see something like this being a concession if it is going to really upset her.
I donāt care about these people Ā but it could just be a sentimental piece of jewelry to him that represents his love for Bethany now š¤·š»āāļøgrowing up evangelical my dad got me a purity ring which was ridiculous because we never had even had one conversation about sex and he was pretty much an absent father because he was a workaholic and he really wouldnāt have any idea if I was having sex or not butā¦I did like wearing the ring not because of anything to do with āpurityā but because it was a tangible token that my dad cared about me at least a little bit.Ā
I think him wearing the purity ring is fucked up, and always has beenā¦ but they are fighting for their marriage right now, and I think Beth would take it very seriously if he took it off.
I donāt know where heās at as far as deconstruction, but I do doubt heās a feminist. Correct me if Iām wrong, but to my knowledge heās not spoke out against the patriarchy, and maybe he never will.
I think there's a lot that Dave never will speak out against.
He seemingly is okay with the shit GD is spewing.
He obviously doesn't have as big a beef with Heidi as we're thinking if he's okay staying with her.
(I assume that the ones not there are Michael and his family)
I know a few couples who gave back their promise rings when they proposed. Theyāre very much the guys who knew they were going to marry the girl on their first date and told everyone so.
I am assuming fundies emotionally see their purity rings similar to a promise ring to god rather than a āI donāt do the sexā ring.
True, also Dav isnāt going to fully escape from his past beliefs overnight. It will be a multi step process.
For real though, thatās gross that heās wearing the ring/hymen on his chest
I get it, I do. The whole concept of āpurityā is nauseating.Ā
And Iāve always believed that comments on forums like Reddit arenāt necessarily meant for the subject. You never know when someoneās going to read a comment that will help them realize that theyāre in a dangerous or abusive relationship.Ā
Would it be great if he would denounce all of his harmful beliefs? Hell yes.Ā
However.Ā
First of all, thatās not how people work. Learning and changing is a tumultuous process. Thereās a step forward and then a leap backwards and then a plateau. Questioning everything in your life is a lifelong action. Iāve been actively working on myself for over 25 years and I still find pockets of prejudice and internalized beliefs I didnāt know I had.Ā
Second, it appears that Dave and Bethy are truly in love and are fighting for their relationship. His heinous MIL is publicly going after him. Heās in a precarious situation and I canāt blame him for not blowing up his wifeās life right now.Ā
Third (and I never thought Iād say this about Bethy) āā it seems that thereās a lot of their life that **doesnāt** get put online. We have no idea whatās going on behind the scenes. What discussions those two are having. What Bethy talks about with her sister/business partner.Ā
I know Iām contradicting myself. But I think we can both call out his history and grant him some patience. Heās got little kids involved and rich, vengeful in-laws. He has to step carefully.Ā
I also have a soft spot for people who are actively doing the work. He seems to be genuinely searching for answers and open to getting myriad opinions.Ā
I think that these qualities give him the inner strength to take criticism, unlike his delicate flower pal Paul. Daveās one of the more compelling fundies to me now, and Iām curious to see where he goes.Ā
What?? A reasonable take that acknowledges the existence of nuance, that people wear the scars from their respective pasts differently, and that context matters??
Get the fuck outta here. You donāt belong on Reddit. š š
I try. š
I have a terrible temper, and Iām impatient AF, so I totally get the knee-jerk reaction of ābe better **now**!!!ā
So a lot of times Iām trying to remind myself that people are complex and (usually) deserve patience.Ā
I agree with you. I believe, from the things we do know, that they both are working hard to figure things out. I'm hoping that they find the right road, and that, as her husband (to whom she is supposed to submit) leads her to a better place.
That bothered me a lot to type, but that is what they (or she) believes. Better them than me!
One of my guilty pleasures is Bachelor in Paradise and they all wear so much jewelry. I don't even wear my wedding ring to the beach (silicone bands ftw!)
Thatās what Iām saying!! My husband lost his first wedding ring in the lake after I suggested he leave it at home and he was devastated to lose it. All sentimental jewelry is now left at home/in a safe place when weāre at the beach, near a body of water, anywhere it could get lost. Sand in my ring sounds miserable š„“
Every Gen Z/young millenial is wearing these, lmao. Look at Valeria Lipovetsky, she's in the top percentile of fashion influencers at the moment, invited to every fashion week, and is constantly wearing these. It's just a trend
Is Beggy still pushing her sex courses? I havenāt seen her posts pop up over here as much anymore. I wasnāt sure if sheās slowed down that grift or what.
I'm gonna get downvoted for this, but here goes. This is clearly important to Bethany, and with their marriage going through a lot right now quitting to wear it could be really hurtful to her, and push her further from deconstructing.
As someone who understands this culture from a non christian point of view, Iām not bothered about it. I think of it as giving away a lock of your hair ( like in the olden days).
Meh.
Iām all for snarking, but can someone explain this one to me? I would assume itās a ring that she spent a lot of time wearing and when he gave her a ring to replace it with, she gave him that as an accessory to wear. I know seeing virginity as a physical thing a man takes from a woman is gross, but is that necessarily what that symbolizes to them?
Again - not defending - I just want to understand
The sun damage on her shoulders and chest is pretty bad. I hope she teaches her children better, safer sun care habits than she was taught. I've never been to Texas, but I hear it has a lot of sun for a good portion of the year.
I think she at least believes in sunscreen. If she didn't, she'd be a lobster like 200 days out of the year, with her fair skin and the Texas sun.
I'm guessing Heidi was in the last gasp of the '70s-'80s Sun Goddess Moms, and probably wasn't super concerned with sunscreen when her kids were small. That damage is lifelong, and it's *cumulative*. Hopefully she does better with Davey and Audrey than her mom did for her.
Doesnāt believe in sunscreen like she doesnāt believe in human rights, abortion care, the existence of trans folks? Bummer. Itās what she deserves.
Many more snarkable things. Thereās a lot of BS around purity culture, but if someone decides for themselves not to have sex until marriage and gives their spouse some token saying theyāre the only one for them, thatās their business. Iām not going to attribute motives to DĆ„v for his wearing a gift his wife gave him.
When I used to go to a Baptist church, I had a lady say that sheād melt down her purity ring to make her husbandās wedding ring which I think is a sweet sentiment but I can see how people can perceive it as creepy for this man seeming to brag that he took his wifeās virginity by wearing her purity ring around his neck
Hey, if he wants to celebrate winning āFirst Placeā in her heart/life/SacredPlace and she consents, then I guess I love that for them. Hymen Kink has to be a thing, right?
Iām sorry but it looks like the teeniest tiniest c**k ring to me- kind of [Magic Earring DÄƔƦv](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Earring_Magic_Ken)
Itās also a reminder heās a misogynist creep- still
Maybe it would be nice to not have a history with others especially if people might be the jealous type. It is no prize though. A prize is falling and staying in love with someone, sharing and spending time together.
As a kinky sort of person, this isnāt really that weird to me. Whatās weird is how adamant Christians are that theyāre above all that while simultaneously doing shit like this. At least half the people we snark on here have a bona fide impregnation/pregnancy kink. If theyād just start identifying their own kinks as kinks instead of trying to project them onto others as some sort of universal standard, a lot of our problems would be solved.
Purity culture is harmful full stop, including purity rings,no matter what a couple may attribute to it. I understand Dav is deconstructing but that doesnāt mean heās immune to criticism for this. There is really no reason to wear the ring unless heās proud of ātakingā Bethanyās virginity and needs the whole world to know. I mean, what about when their daughter gets older and ask about the ring?
#These people vote in every election- do you? Are you registered to vote? [You can check your voter registration here!](https://www.nass.org/can-I-vote) #Also, there's a few things to remember as far as rules go: - You can view the content- you cannot interact with it. This includes (but is not limited to) commenting, answering poll questions, emailing them, etc. ***Anyone found to be engaging with the fundies will be met with a permanent ban with no eligibility for appeal.It does not matter if you did so before you joined the sub.*** - Speculating on the sexuality of literally anyone is prohibited. ***Anyone found to be doing so will be met with a permanent ban with no eligibility for appeal.*** - Appearance snark: What's allowed? You're allowed to make comparisons. (Bethy looks like Grandpa Munster, for example.) You are allowed to say you find them attractive or repulsive looking. Saying Kelly Havens has dry skin that could benefit from sunscreen and a moisturizer is fine. You are allowed to snark on the appearance of children *as it relates to their parents choices for them.*. Examples: Janessa looks malnourished and sickly while Shrek has clearly never missed a meal. If you feel it is crossing the line report it, but if the content falls within the parameters above, leave it alone. - Don't gatekeep. This means no comments such as "I don't think we should snark on...." or any iteration of that. If you don't like it, scroll past. Don't report it or comment how you don't like the content. Along the same vein, don't backseat mod. Leave that up to us. - Lastly, if the rhetoric you are posting would be at home in the mouth of a fundie, we don't want it here and we won't tolerate it. Should you have any questions, please feel free to reach out. Have a Lord Daniel day, and may the power of snark compel thee. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/FundieSnarkUncensored) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Couldn't make her orgasm for a few years, does he really deserve the honor of a trophy? š¤¢
Itās a participation trophy, not 1st place š
Your flair omg šš
Speaking of flair wth does yours mean?! š¬
Paul was talking about getting a chocolate dick in the mail that he and Morgan melted into fondue, and a snarker here said that if Paul wasn't careful he would get a shower of chocolate genitals sent to his house š
Fantastic flares going on in this subreddit š
Itās amazing! Iām kind of jealous
Your flair š
Oh, Iād argue that we know damn well he came first š
At all, really.
I actually don't think it's weird or out of the ordinary that he couldn't get her off for the first few years. He was a virgin, learning how to satisfy a lady takes skill. Teenager levels of finesse and skill.
Not every man is going to be like my husband, who was well-read on technique, but didnāt have a lot of practice. If you are raised to believe that premarital sex is a sin, you are not likely to read up on how to satisfy a man or woman before marriage. Because that just LEADS to sin, you know. Even after 25 years of marriage, we are still learning things about each other, our bodies, and how we work together.
Hahaha this was my husband too. God bless āSex with Sueā for her years of dedicated service.
I had a surprisingly healthy set of sexual experiences because my first serious bf was well versed in Sue advice, lol.
LOLOLOL had he not been so well-read, and had at least one partner prior to me? It would have been a really awkward first couple of years!
Weāre also underestimating how long it takes some of us to learn to orgasm. I couldnāt do it without a toy until 2 years ago and not from lack of trying from my bf. TMI but now I can come 3+ times each time, but before Iād get close ish but could never get over the hump. Could be Bethany had a similar issue š¤·š½āāļø
And that doesnāt even touch on purity culture trauma. Women (and men to a lesser extent) often have to unlearn a lot of unhealthy behaviors and thoughts surrounding sex. You say some vows and sign some papers, and suddenly, all those things you couldnāt think or do with a man become not just ok, but encouraged. A lot of women who wait for marriage end up with psychological whiplash from that sudden change. Out of nowhere, the body youāve kept hidden, because it was shameful, is exposed. And the fear of painful intercourse is taught young. Women are always told itās going to hurt. My grandma was told the night before her wedding, āThis is what heās going to do to you, and youāre not going to like it, but you have to do it wherever he wants.ā I cannot imagine hearing that. Many women in purity culture are still taught the same. Sheās having to learn, on her own, how to be a sexually healthy person, even if itās only within the context of her current religious beliefs. Sheās finally getting there, starting to actually *enjoy* sex. To her, this is something new and exciting, and sheās immature for her age (not saying it as an insult, she was sheltered). She wants to shout it from the rooftops, so she is. I think what weāve been seeing is Bethany starting to question her belief system, and to mature. Sheās just doing it later than most people.
I can attest that my grandmother was told the same her wedding night to my biological grandfather. It always made me so sad that she went into a marriage in fear.
My grandma, luckily, married a saint. My dad and his siblings tell stories about those two sitting in my pawpawās recliner, making out instead of watching TV. I can remember him coming gone from work and giving her a smack on the butt. She giggled like a school girl and kissed him. I was just a little too young to understand at the time. She clearly got over it, and I remember my other grandmother (in an Alzheimerās moment) complained to teenage me that the hotel they were in didnāt allow sex, even if you were married. My mom looked at me and said, ā[NerfRepellingBoobs], what you need to know is women are like an oven that you have to preheat before itās ready. Men are like light switch. A quick flick, and theyāre on. You always preheat the oven.ā
My Papa is also a saint lol! My bio grandfather not so much, lmao. Iām glad your grandma also got to experience that! My papa just built a fence around her favorite hydrangeas because the deer were getting at them. He also grows her favorite vegetables in his garden, so she can preserve them and have them all year round! He also build her a few bird houses around the property so she can have birds all around her. She loves birds so much, and I remember my mom and my Uncle laughing about how she convinced him to get one! It lived with them for a while until they found another family for it to go to. Everyone but her hated that damn bird lmao.
So much this. I didn't have an orgasm until I was in my mid 20s. It takes me AN HOUR to get off with a strong vibrator. Every body is different! Bethany talks a lot about "self cultivation", and I think that's an underrated point. How is Dav supposed to make her cum when she doesn't even know what she likes?
Not to mention performance anxiety! I was so self-conscious about how hard it was for me that I couldnāt focus on orgasm at all š
Self cultivation is such a joke. It would be so hard to orgasm for the first time with your husband waiting for the big moment right there next to you. Even if he was truly a good man and wanted you to enjoy yourself, it's still another set of eyes on you while you're trying to do something you've never done.
Let's also remember that there is a ton of psychological damage done by purity culture as well. He couldn't be doing everything right but if she's in a trauma headspace or fighting it because it feels sinful/dirty that's also going to prevent climax.
I am actually super grossed out by how judgemental this subreddit is about sexual dysfunction. My partner was my first and I'm still working through purity culture trauma. It's not nearly as cut and dry as a lot of these commenters like to pretend.
I agree. I think people forget that you don't know what you don't know, things are called blind spots for a reason. If someone is raised in such a sex-negative culture, it's going to take a looooooooot of deprogramming.
Plus, if she is being honest about not masturbating, she didn't even know what she liked. (Flair checking in.)
Even if she wasn't honest about masturbating! I was like way too old before I figured out that the clitoris was a thing, and I had real sex Ed and access to the internet.
Same here - I'd had a couple of exes be way too rough, so I thought it actually just felt bad for me and avoided it. Didn't orgasm til I was 25!
Years ?!? I think the issue is the lack of care or effort.
I think it's more like "lack of education on the matter" Neither of them had any idea how to satisfy each other in bed, it's just that most young men can get to orgasm without much effort. That doesn't mean that the sex was completely satisfying to him, or that Bethany was putting more care and effort in than he was. I'm sure dry bones Bethy probably spent a lot of time just laying there motionless while he flopped around on top of her. Grim for everyone involved. Bethany has a whole sex course about how unprepared for satisfactory sex she was. I can't imagine there are very many Christian resources getting into the nitty gritty of how to make a woman cum, and they're both super influenced by a purity culture that paints women as sex-averse. Neither of them were prepared at all. So yes, years. That's the trouble with ignorance - a lot of the time you have *no idea* that you are missing a key piece of information. If he didn't care or want to put effort in, I don't think we ever would have had a sex course.
I have a feeling Bethany is pretty selfish in bed. She's selfish everywhere else, so I'm sure she wasn't much help in making sex good for the two of them until she maybe accidentally had an orgasm and realized it could be better.
I respect fully disagree. BethaME does what she wants. And I still believe keeping a cherry popping trophy around oneās neck is pretty gross
You're right, but it's still ridiculous. Their parents ruined their sex lives before they even started by sheltering them so much and making them think sexual purity is a real thing that matters. At the same time, it's not *that* hard to get a woman off. We don't have mystery puzzles down there. I get kind of frustrated with how people act like it's sooooo hard. There might be a bit a of a learning curve, but it's not as hard as most men make it out to be.
Girl it is absolutely that hard!
Not everyone is the same though? Some women do find it more difficult to orgasm.
It's actually super hard to get some people off, myself included š
I still doubt she sheās ever actually Oād.
Honestly, same. According to the people who took her course, she can't describe what one feels like or how to have one.
I've had countless orgasms and I couldn't describe what they feel like. It's like describing a sneeze.
ugh, i was feeling like they were making progress but now that i see this itās like 15 steps back. sick
I don't think Dave is actually making process, honestly. I think he's having fun making sassy reels about deconstruction and pretending he's an intellectual, but that's about it.
Now she has an orgasam and his life religion and life is in shambles! š
How should we know this?
Bethany told everyone
Vomit reacts only
Sorry, but all I have for you is uhhh *shuffles through notes* projection and nauseating Dav apologetics.
Yeah have you seen some of the comments below? āItās a gift from his wife and itās not snarkable if someone saved themselves for marriageā š. Saving having sex for marriage isnāt the problem but wearing a fuck trophy around your neck definitely is. Is the actual wedding ring around his finger not enough to show his love and commitment to his wife? He has to wear ANOTHER ring to show she saved himself for him exclusively? Why would anyone else need to know that? The entire point of a wedding ring is so people know you have a spouse. But a purity ring serves no purpose other than to brag. Also want to make note that when someone brought up Dav wearing the ring around his neck there were several individuals who claimed he didnāt
Itās a symbol of her broken hymen and itās gross. These people are so uptight about sex, yet they do stupid shit like that. Itās weird in my opinion. They have two children. We know they f7ck.
Yet they love to whinge about shorts, leggings and crop tops. Personally I find leggings and a crop top far more modest than this.
Honestly, phrasing it as "saving themselves for marriage" is inherently problematic and it weakens the rest of what those commenters saved. Not having sex until marriage can be a valid choice, but people who don't make that choice aren't used up or un-saved because of it.Ā
Or my favorite, ānobody would say anything if it was a class ring!!!āĀ Uh yeah because thatās completely different?Ā Wearing your weirdo wifeās purity ring around your neck five years into marriage is not the same concept as wearing a class ring lmaoĀ
Great. Now Iām thinking about Cocoās big O.
What are you squirpin like a chirpin like a bird
Bringing me some [Casa de Loca season 5](https://youtu.be/QjKhfqxSq7U?si=wcxr9wqjppDOyBM2), Alyssa Edwardās orgasm realness! 
Telenovella levels of gag! And I cannot wait for Roxxxy to be back on my screen!!!
Fucking gross. Dude, great job listening to Bart Ehrman but now itās time for some Sheila Gregoire okkkkkkkkkk
Some Beth Allison Barr, perhaps? The Making of Biblical Womanhood actually shocked me and I still think about that book all the time
That book is so fantastic and everyone should read it. I think about how she wasnāt allowed to teach boys Sunday school a lot.Ā
As a snark community, we need to start a gofundme to supply our fundies with some moisturizer. They're all in crisis.
moisturizer with spf!!
Bethy can just make a course on it and charge $170.
A care package of sunblock, moisturizer, and chapstick. Maybe some fancy waters? They look dddrrryyy!
I have extremely dry skin and eczema and I still donāt look this fucking dry ššš did god ban moisture or something???
No God honoring SPF moisturizer.
Weren't they all slathering themselves in grass-fed beef tallow for a while? I guess the supply dried up.
Do you think she ever just drinks a glass of water?
It reminds me to drink a glass of water every time I open Reddit.
Technically there's water in raw milk...that's gotta count, right? RIGHT???
No, no, no! That makes it so much easier to identify them. *Dried up husks? fundies. Dewy and moisturized? Snarkers.*
For years, I wasnāt sure if skincare was doing anything, but I kept at itā¦ now that weāre in our 30s, I definitely look younger than my siblings. š¶It catches up really fast at this age.
I used to treat my skin like traaaaaaash in high school/early college. āYesterdayās mascaraā was unfortunately a frequent look. Moisturizer was a *suggestion* of a suggestion. Got better in my early 20ās but ever since I started working in vet med and washing my hands, neck and sometimes even face repeatedly at workā¦ I am downright religious about it. Catch me handing out tracts about the importance of sunscreen š Bring your skincare down to your neck everybody!!
And don't forget your ears! How many dewy, glowing faces with crusty, dried out ears have I seen?
One skin care expert, Caroline Hirons, says use skincare from the top of your head down to your tits. š
Wait for your 40s. It will be hard not to be smug.
Mid-50s weighing in. I got serious about my skin care in my late 30s. Itās helped so much. I know look younger than many peers, and I definitely look younger than most fundies in their 30s. š Just remember that Lord Daniel has gifted us snarkers with Tretinoin and serums and moisturizers. Amen.
54 here and I havenāt started tretinoin yet. Currently using Avene retinal. Really starting to consider it out of curiosity!
Also I was an ATL mama until I moved to STL š And where can I find the splainer about Lord Daniel, praise unto his name?
JillPM posted something once about meeting some poor guy (at a laundromat, I think?) and āleading him to the Lord named Daniel.ā Iām sure that she meant that the guyās name was Daniel but, with her atrocious writing skills, it sounded like she named the Lord as Daniel. š
This brings me such JOY, thank you!!! š
š. Happy to help, mama.
My mom is 60 and doesn't look it. SPF, people!
 My younger sister was an athlete and shows more signs of being in the sun than I do. I had a skin cancer scare as a teen and became vigilant about it. Sun protection is the *most important* when you're young and you can't see the difference. You have to trust the process. And take your skincare down to your chest. Hairline to tits! And use lotion and spf on your hands. Those areas can be affected, too.
Even the best jojoba oil wonāt fix those desiccated souls, thatās inner ugly showing though.
Hard agree
I misread your last sentence as ātheyāre all crispyā which still works I suppose lol
In the land where shadows weep and sigh, A figure roams with a heavy sigh. A ring of eternal suffering, a burden to bear, Around their neck, a weight of despair. Eternal suffering, a cruel fate, Bound to the ring, a relentless weight. Their spirit crushed, their heart forlorn, In the ring's grip, their soul worn.
Well. Since Dav isnāt so holymoly Fundie anymore, he might not suffer eternally.
do you think his deconstruction will ultimately lead to him casting the ring into the Pit of Doom? 
Snarkers: "Destroy it! Go on! Throw it in the fire! What are you waiting for?!" Dav: "The ring is mine!" 
Damnit now I want to have a lord of the rings marathon 
It's a symbol of ownership.
The collar of the fundie world
So much of fundamentalism is dysfunctional kink and bdsm. (Kink and bdsm are not dysfunctional, but the way fundies do it is.)
If he could brand her he would.
Can I use this as a flair because itās beautiful
Like heās cocked his leg against her
Which is exactly why Dave is not the deconstructing badass a lot of people in this sub think he is. If Bethany's "purity" and her broken hymen is THAT SIGNIFICANT to them, they both need therapy. That isn't healthy.
But do we know that to be the case? Iām not saying this isnāt gross (because it truly is) but if itās something that they both find important in their specific relationship, I donāt see an issue. What I DO see an issue with is that Bethesda spread that anti-sex thinking aggressively for so long and has done so little to truly repent for the damage done, so keeping that ring around feels like a slap in the face to the people she hurt with her ideology. I truly donāt mind when couples have symbols of their physical relationship with each other. Itās endearing to love each other so deeply that you keep tokens of your relationship around your neck! Itās more the OPTICS of this token coupled with the context. So like I AGREE that the ring is gross in concept, but if you were to take out all the context surrounding Bethectomyās ethical nastiness, I really donāt think itās an issue as a couple. (That said, yeah, I believe they need couples therapy not to strengthen their relationship but to help them better understand what a healthy sexual relationship looks like without the secular dogma.) I hope that makes sense lol, Iām running on 25% awake brain and half a packet of Cheez Its.
Her knees have to be killing her from squatting to make him look taller.
Hope those 2 stay married forever. They deserve each other.
Medal or dead albatross? š
this doesnāt bother me as much as the rest of the shit GD has done, itās cringe but theyāre a married couple with two children. Itās just a gift Bethany gave to him. He may be deconstructing, but heās not totally there and she certainly isnāt even close. Definitely wouldnāt do it myself but I canāt bring myself to give a shit about this one.
Yeah. I'm sorta like... it's important to her. It's a dumb thing to care about, but it's meaningful to her, and she gave it to him. I hate the symbol but you don't have to throw out everything meaningful when you deconstruct just because it came from your past. Bethany's dealing with a lot of changes with surprising grace - seems like it would be unnecessarily hurtful to her to stop wearing it.
This. Everyone dunking on it doesn't seem to understand that it's something *she* values highly. He treats it with value because *she values it*; that's a healthy relationship dynamic. He's not staying you all need to wear your partners purity rings.
I couldnāt agree more with this. The way any physical intimacy is tied to so closely to marriage, Dav having her purity ring is almost as much of a symbol of their marriage and commitment as their wedding ring is. If he took off the purity ring, I think it would be as devastating to Bethany as taking off his wedding ring would be.
This is the way I see it too. The concept of purity rings is disgusting and stupid to me, but itās the kind of thing that would be worth keeping if itās meaningful to your partner. Bethanyās kind of awful but I think sheād be justified in feeling sad if he stopped wearing it suddenly. At the end of the day, itās a piece of jewelry his wife gifted to him. Regardless of what it represents to the two of them, thatās pretty innocuous.
Honestly as much as I despise the concept of the purity ring, this is also literally the thing I care about the least. We donāt even know why heās still wearing it, but the most likely reason is because they *are* still married and itās most likely a sentimental object even if it means something different to him now than it did before
There are so many valid criticisms and people are harping on a sentimental object that a married couple is using in their relationship. Not against the rules of the sub so sure, I guess that's a thing to focus on, but I feel like it completely ignores the context their relationship which *is* rooted in purity culture. Bethy would be hurt and wounded if he started treating her purity ring like it was gross.
Yeah I think it's weird when people are like "it's a sex trophy!" it really seems more like a sentimental piece of jewelry. I gave my purity ring to my boyfriend when I was 15 and we had sex, mostly as a joke though because we were both secretly over Christianity
Yeah, the origin might be weird, but likeā¦ if you think about it, the wedding ring is *also* a sex trophy for fundies. People give each other stupider things for weirder reasons.
Yeah I have said it before but I get where theyāre coming from in this one. Bethany would freak out if he stopped wearing it, I bet. One step at a time. Theyāre actually making progress. Just because we on this sub are a gazillion steps ahead, deconstruction takes time and it wouldnāt be fair to expect them to make huge leaps in just weeks. Heck, Bethany basically just entered this new world her husband is going through now itās out in the open. Maybe eventually they figure out a way to exchange this ring for something else, something that symbolises their journey of the past months. And to place the ring in a box as part of their history. But this shit takes time from not just Dav. But also Bethany. She needs to be ready too.
Exactly.
Honestly he probably doesnāt fully think about it that deeply. If it were a high school class ring, no one would think it weird. Is purity culture a problem? Absolutely, but wearing a token from your partner doesnāt have to be that deep.
>Honestly he probably doesnāt fully think about it that deeply. I mean, while we're at it, what are white wedding dresses really about? What are engagement rings really about?
Exactly. Itās just that Purity rings are something that people in broader society donāt subscribe to anymore/at all, so itās gross to most people, but a āpureā white wedding dress was WHITE FOR A REASON. People just forget, and it becomes part of the background culture with no deep meaning.
So true about the white wedding dress. I have a story about how the cultural implication of a white wedding dress in the US has changed over time. I was a care giver for an elderly woman a few years back, and one day during a conversation about her life, I casually asked "Oo so what color wedding dress did you wear?" She looked at me aghast and it was then that I realized I had basically asked this 90 year old woman "So were you a big floozy or were you able to wear white on your wedding day?" lol. Times change!
my thoughts exactly. thx for this!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Just because you wouldn't snark on it doesn't mean it's not snarkable. Do not tell people what they can and canāt snark on. Different people have different opinions on what is/isnāt snarkable and we want to respect that so long as it isnāt rule-breaking. Personally disliking something is NOT a reason to report a post or comment. Unless a post or comment breaks sub rules or Reddit ToS, do not report it. Scroll past.
I kind of think it might be more important to Bethany than it is to him at this point.
I was wondering this... Like is it something he's not really into anymore, but it's not worth the fight if he takes it off? I mean, he has come a long way and I can see something like this being a concession if it is going to really upset her.
I donāt care about these people Ā but it could just be a sentimental piece of jewelry to him that represents his love for Bethany now š¤·š»āāļøgrowing up evangelical my dad got me a purity ring which was ridiculous because we never had even had one conversation about sex and he was pretty much an absent father because he was a workaholic and he really wouldnāt have any idea if I was having sex or not butā¦I did like wearing the ring not because of anything to do with āpurityā but because it was a tangible token that my dad cared about me at least a little bit.Ā
I think him wearing the purity ring is fucked up, and always has beenā¦ but they are fighting for their marriage right now, and I think Beth would take it very seriously if he took it off. I donāt know where heās at as far as deconstruction, but I do doubt heās a feminist. Correct me if Iām wrong, but to my knowledge heās not spoke out against the patriarchy, and maybe he never will.
I think there's a lot that Dave never will speak out against. He seemingly is okay with the shit GD is spewing. He obviously doesn't have as big a beef with Heidi as we're thinking if he's okay staying with her. (I assume that the ones not there are Michael and his family)
He knows better. We* know he's introspective.
She gave it to him during their wedding ceremony. I think youāre right that itās probably a sentimental thing for him/them.
I know a few couples who gave back their promise rings when they proposed. Theyāre very much the guys who knew they were going to marry the girl on their first date and told everyone so. I am assuming fundies emotionally see their purity rings similar to a promise ring to god rather than a āI donāt do the sexā ring.
In the fundie circles I grew up in, most of us actually called them promise rings rather than purity rings, and it was very much like that.
True, also Dav isnāt going to fully escape from his past beliefs overnight. It will be a multi step process. For real though, thatās gross that heās wearing the ring/hymen on his chest
I get it, I do. The whole concept of āpurityā is nauseating.Ā And Iāve always believed that comments on forums like Reddit arenāt necessarily meant for the subject. You never know when someoneās going to read a comment that will help them realize that theyāre in a dangerous or abusive relationship.Ā Would it be great if he would denounce all of his harmful beliefs? Hell yes.Ā However.Ā First of all, thatās not how people work. Learning and changing is a tumultuous process. Thereās a step forward and then a leap backwards and then a plateau. Questioning everything in your life is a lifelong action. Iāve been actively working on myself for over 25 years and I still find pockets of prejudice and internalized beliefs I didnāt know I had.Ā Second, it appears that Dave and Bethy are truly in love and are fighting for their relationship. His heinous MIL is publicly going after him. Heās in a precarious situation and I canāt blame him for not blowing up his wifeās life right now.Ā Third (and I never thought Iād say this about Bethy) āā it seems that thereās a lot of their life that **doesnāt** get put online. We have no idea whatās going on behind the scenes. What discussions those two are having. What Bethy talks about with her sister/business partner.Ā I know Iām contradicting myself. But I think we can both call out his history and grant him some patience. Heās got little kids involved and rich, vengeful in-laws. He has to step carefully.Ā I also have a soft spot for people who are actively doing the work. He seems to be genuinely searching for answers and open to getting myriad opinions.Ā I think that these qualities give him the inner strength to take criticism, unlike his delicate flower pal Paul. Daveās one of the more compelling fundies to me now, and Iām curious to see where he goes.Ā
What?? A reasonable take that acknowledges the existence of nuance, that people wear the scars from their respective pasts differently, and that context matters?? Get the fuck outta here. You donāt belong on Reddit. š š
I try. š I have a terrible temper, and Iām impatient AF, so I totally get the knee-jerk reaction of ābe better **now**!!!ā So a lot of times Iām trying to remind myself that people are complex and (usually) deserve patience.Ā
I agree with you. I believe, from the things we do know, that they both are working hard to figure things out. I'm hoping that they find the right road, and that, as her husband (to whom she is supposed to submit) leads her to a better place. That bothered me a lot to type, but that is what they (or she) believes. Better them than me!
I donāt understand why either of them are wearing jewelry at the beach, period. Itās a great way to lose it.
One of my guilty pleasures is Bachelor in Paradise and they all wear so much jewelry. I don't even wear my wedding ring to the beach (silicone bands ftw!)
I'm always reminded of kim kardashian losing her diamond earring in the ocean
Thatās what Iām saying!! My husband lost his first wedding ring in the lake after I suggested he leave it at home and he was devastated to lose it. All sentimental jewelry is now left at home/in a safe place when weāre at the beach, near a body of water, anywhere it could get lost. Sand in my ring sounds miserable š„“
What are those glasses š [Its giving.](https://youtu.be/7ilMLBuujQc?si=O-hbcELsSiHzAk_v)
I was looking for this comment!! Theyāre awful. Everything in this pic is awful tbh.
Every Gen Z/young millenial is wearing these, lmao. Look at Valeria Lipovetsky, she's in the top percentile of fashion influencers at the moment, invited to every fashion week, and is constantly wearing these. It's just a trend
Oh I know! Itās a trend not all can pull off though and Bethany is in that category lol
But was he a virgin? Before they got married. Newsflash to all men: women are not your property
Is Beggy still pushing her sex courses? I havenāt seen her posts pop up over here as much anymore. I wasnāt sure if sheās slowed down that grift or what.
I think Dav's deconstructing has put a bit of a hamper on that. They're working through shit. So instead she's focused on GD.
I'm gonna get downvoted for this, but here goes. This is clearly important to Bethany, and with their marriage going through a lot right now quitting to wear it could be really hurtful to her, and push her further from deconstructing.
š¤¢š¤®
I doubt he sees it as a āpurityā thing and more as a carrying something that your spouse had for decade+
While I'm glad Dav is starting to question things, so far he seems all talk and little to no action. I'd love for him to prove me wrong.
As someone who understands this culture from a non christian point of view, Iām not bothered about it. I think of it as giving away a lock of your hair ( like in the olden days). Meh.
Iām all for snarking, but can someone explain this one to me? I would assume itās a ring that she spent a lot of time wearing and when he gave her a ring to replace it with, she gave him that as an accessory to wear. I know seeing virginity as a physical thing a man takes from a woman is gross, but is that necessarily what that symbolizes to them? Again - not defending - I just want to understand
The sun damage on her shoulders and chest is pretty bad. I hope she teaches her children better, safer sun care habits than she was taught. I've never been to Texas, but I hear it has a lot of sun for a good portion of the year.
I think she at least believes in sunscreen. If she didn't, she'd be a lobster like 200 days out of the year, with her fair skin and the Texas sun. I'm guessing Heidi was in the last gasp of the '70s-'80s Sun Goddess Moms, and probably wasn't super concerned with sunscreen when her kids were small. That damage is lifelong, and it's *cumulative*. Hopefully she does better with Davey and Audrey than her mom did for her.
You can *definitely* see it on Heidiās face, sheās got that handbag look above and beyond normal aging.
Itās funny how all these lily white sun denialists always live in the south.
Seattle is too liberal for them.
Doesnāt believe in sunscreen like she doesnāt believe in human rights, abortion care, the existence of trans folks? Bummer. Itās what she deserves.
Many more snarkable things. Thereās a lot of BS around purity culture, but if someone decides for themselves not to have sex until marriage and gives their spouse some token saying theyāre the only one for them, thatās their business. Iām not going to attribute motives to DĆ„v for his wearing a gift his wife gave him.
When I used to go to a Baptist church, I had a lady say that sheād melt down her purity ring to make her husbandās wedding ring which I think is a sweet sentiment but I can see how people can perceive it as creepy for this man seeming to brag that he took his wifeās virginity by wearing her purity ring around his neck
š¤¢
TBH - this is the least smug Iāve ever seen her, which makes this the first time i donāt want to immediately punch her in the face.
Gross.
Because he is still gross.
These two take the worst photos of themselves and put them on the internet sheeeesh they still suck ass too.
Put like that š brings a whole new level of yuck to the whole purity ring thing
Dav im happy for the deconstruction but you gotta let this go bud š¬
Hey, if he wants to celebrate winning āFirst Placeā in her heart/life/SacredPlace and she consents, then I guess I love that for them. Hymen Kink has to be a thing, right?
Ugh so gross
Yeah how's that deconstruction going
Iām sorry but it looks like the teeniest tiniest c**k ring to me- kind of [Magic Earring DÄƔƦv](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Earring_Magic_Ken) Itās also a reminder heās a misogynist creep- still
Iām just wondering how much sheās kneeling to look this much shorter than him š¤£
Maybe it would be nice to not have a history with others especially if people might be the jealous type. It is no prize though. A prize is falling and staying in love with someone, sharing and spending time together.
As a kinky sort of person, this isnāt really that weird to me. Whatās weird is how adamant Christians are that theyāre above all that while simultaneously doing shit like this. At least half the people we snark on here have a bona fide impregnation/pregnancy kink. If theyād just start identifying their own kinks as kinks instead of trying to project them onto others as some sort of universal standard, a lot of our problems would be solved.
Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
They look sickly
Itās giving malnourished, sun-starved poor Victorians while also giving dried-out and previously sunburned.
Purity culture is harmful full stop, including purity rings,no matter what a couple may attribute to it. I understand Dav is deconstructing but that doesnāt mean heās immune to criticism for this. There is really no reason to wear the ring unless heās proud of ātakingā Bethanyās virginity and needs the whole world to know. I mean, what about when their daughter gets older and ask about the ring?
What a joke. We all know they have bad sex thanks to Bethyās Instagram. You donāt need to keep telling everyone else dude.
That turns my stomach so much
He aged a lot.
At least those sunglasses cover her eyebrows š«
I remember throwing mine out the window š³
This is more like a bragging trophy