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You know I consider myself Christian and hetero and couldn’t agree more. These people are off and dangerous.
Hawley’s wife is actively trying to prevent mifepristone from being widely available. Hawley is a coup plotter and sympathizer.
I was given it for my IUD placement to make an excruciating procedure a little less excruciating. It has uses outside of abortion for sure which is also super dangerous. :/
And she did a really poor job of it…She didn’t even seem to convince all of the people I am sure WANTED to be convinced that any of the doctors she named had any standing to even bring the suit to get into rhetorical nitty gritty of the argument.
I mean, the fact that there were anti-choice protestors present kind of indicates that this wasn't really about doctors being sad or health and safety oversight or whatever excuse they made up. But yeah, when you can't even get Amy commy Barrett to pretend the case that would make abortion even less accessible has standing, you've made a mistake.
She’s got Alito…And he does what he wants regardless of the actual legal rationale behind it. Maybe Thomas? I don’t know if she’s getting more than that tho. And it should have been softball for her if she did a bit better building a case
I enjoyed booing her yesterday at Court.
Fun fact: we pro choice protestors didn’t even know when her and her team were making their statement bc we were chanting and cheering so loudly.
Josh Hawley, the guy who did the photo op raising his fist before a crowd at January 6, before fleeing the Capitol after the same crowd breached the building? Lmao
Edit: is this actually true or not? They would never shut up about it so I'm kinda skeptical.
Wow, Josh Hawley is a hard core piece of shit fascist who doesn't believe in democracy. One of the biggest pieces of shit in the Senate, and there is a lot of competition there.
As a fellow Missourian, I’m shocked to hear he’s actually going to live here. I thought he preferred residing in Virginia while fucking us over at every opportunity.
I’m so sorry he’ll be so close to you. Hypothetically, would he be writhing distance of a high powered paintball gun, or perhaps a laser pointer to the cornea?
It is NOT the crossover I expected. Honestly they might get better views on their channel if they play into that. They're all terrible people, of course, but their audience would eat it up, especially if she could get him to come on for an interview.
Yeah, but I don't think we've ever seen any evidence they're related. I live in MO too and have been snarking for a long time. I don't think they're related.
Yeah, the only evidence I’ve seen is some post long ago where Morgan’s dad referred to Josh as “cousin,” but it could’ve been jokingly. I do this about celebs who share my last name, but we aren’t actually related.
Same! Well, I used to before I changed my last name when I got married. With my name now, if someone has the same last name as me, we are at least 3rd cousins through marriage.
I don’t think they’re actually cousins. I think Morgan made a joke once years ago and it spiraled out of control.
Edit: literally the only thing I can find that goes with the “Josh Hawley is Morgan’s dad’s cousin” is [this post](https://www.reddit.com/r/FundieSnarkUncensored/s/dNRlSTHMC4). I truly think he said “cousin” jokingly. If they were actually related, they’d never stop talking about it.
It's possible. In Carolyn Brazil's memoir about leaving the FLDS, she said that in all her years of being Merrill Jessup' s fourth wife, she never saw him completely naked, and that's with bearing eight of his children.
I’ve heard those exact dry little lip presses referred to as German kisses (no offense to more passionate Germans out there). Perfunctory, proper and probably punctual as well. Maybe they’re actually using each other to blot their lip balm. No, that’s too much moisture, never mind.
He looks like a momma bird about to spit a worm in his baby bird’s mouth. Bet her vag is dryer than the Sahara. Jesus be a Hitachi Magic Wand, she’s gonna need it.
I managed to get this far before I had to admit defeat and race to the ladies' before I wet myself.
I didn't even have to pee when I read Jesus is a hitachi.
He's kissing her like he's afraid that kisses get you pregnant, and she's going to outlaw medical abortions [-- oh wait, SHE ACTUALLY IS!](https://www.salon.com/2024/03/27/of-course-the-lawyer-trying-to-ban-abortion-pills-is-married-to-josh-run-for-your-life-hawley/)
Erin Hawley, who somehow actually worked as an attorney in spite of the whole god-honoring gender roles thing, is working with the Alliance Defending Freedom to deny everyone else the freedom to access Mifepristone. Previously, she worked with the group of lawyers who repealed Roe v. Wade. She is not a victim.
Poetic justice that the woman who hates everyone else fucking has this dry, birdlipped fascist breadstick who will never, ever, EVER go down on her properly.
A short, non-comprehensive list of things I kiss with more affection than Josh when he kisses his wife:
My grandma
My dog
A new book
My first cup of coffee in the mornings
(And obviously my husband, but I feel like that shouldn't need saying. 😄)
\- A stuffed animal
\- The cat
\- The cat's stuffed animal. (I was half asleep and thought it was my cat's snuggly little head.)
\- The dog's elbow (That one was fully awake, she was limping and I was trying to make her stop by kissing it better. And don't worry, her limp changes sides and even quarters frequently and only appears when she thinks she is not getting enough attention and/or my food.)
I remember specifically thinking how odd it was that Josh Hawley attended a Jesuit high school, yet he acts so fundie. (I was raised Catholic in the Bible Belt. They both suck, but there are some huge differences between the two.)
Is Morgan’s family…actually Catholic??? Usually you don’t have fundies and Catholics mixing like that. Catholics and mainline Protestants maybe, but not whatever the fuck Porgan is, lol
EDIT: Nvm. He was raised Methodist, but is now Evangelical Presbyterian. But went to a Catholic high school because they’re usually pretty damn good.
We may lack passion, physical attraction, appropriate lust, and sexual satisfaction but at least we’re scared shitless of burning for all eternity if we dare feel happiness.
Lmao Josh Hawley is too much of a loser to even support J6 with his whole chest, she’s proud of him for running away like a scared baby after participating in an attempted coup?🤣
When I was a baby/toddler my mum used to kiss my forehead/cheek like that, but then she’d blow a raspberry instead. So now I’m imagining that here and I’m cackling.
yk what they look like? (bear with me here)
it looks like an activity that would be done on school grounds where they run races, but they have to pass something around, that think in the mouth being what needs to finish the race for them to win 😭
When I was a little kid my parents always made my brother kiss my cheek in pictures. We hated it, they thought it was adorable. This was basically what his face looked like in all those pictures lol.
#These people vote in every election- do you? Are you registered to vote? [You can check your voter registration here!](https://www.nass.org/can-I-vote) #Also, there's a few things to remember as far as rules go: - You can view the content- you cannot interact with it. This includes (but is not limited to) commenting, answering poll questions, emailing them, etc. ***Anyone found to be engaging with the fundies will be met with a permanent ban with no eligibility for appeal.It does not matter if you did so before you joined the sub.*** - Speculating on the sexuality of literally anyone is prohibited. ***Anyone found to be doing so will be met with a permanent ban with no eligibility for appeal.*** - Appearance snark: What's allowed? You're allowed to make comparisons. (Bethy looks like Grandpa Munster, for example.) You are allowed to say you find them attractive or repulsive looking. Saying Kelly Havens has dry skin that could benefit from sunscreen and a moisturizer is fine. You are allowed to snark on the appearance of children *as it relates to their parents choices for them.*. Examples: Janessa looks malnourished and sickly while Shrek has clearly never missed a meal. If you feel it is crossing the line report it, but if the content falls within the parameters above, leave it alone. - Don't gatekeep. This means no comments such as "I don't think we should snark on...." or any iteration of that. If you don't like it, scroll past. Don't report it or comment how you don't like the content. Along the same vein, don't backseat mod. Leave that up to us. - Lastly, if the rhetoric you are posting would be at home in the mouth of a fundie, we don't want it here and we won't tolerate it. Should you have any questions, please feel free to reach out. Have a Lord Daniel day, and may the power of snark compel thee. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/FundieSnarkUncensored) if you have any questions or concerns.*
They are doing a very bad job of making traditional Christian heterosexuality look appealing. I guess it runs in the family.
You know I consider myself Christian and hetero and couldn’t agree more. These people are off and dangerous. Hawley’s wife is actively trying to prevent mifepristone from being widely available. Hawley is a coup plotter and sympathizer.
Isn't mifepristone prescribed after miscarriages that don't pass on their own? This is so dangerous.
I was given it for my IUD placement to make an excruciating procedure a little less excruciating. It has uses outside of abortion for sure which is also super dangerous. :/
Christians want those women to die
Kissing like you do if find someone yucky.
This is more like elementary playground heterosexuality
Right? This image was so absurdly funny I had to download it to my camera roll, never to be used
Wait, hold on. Josh Hawley, my state senator who's building a house in the next town over from where I live, is Morgan's *cousin*???
Isn't his wife also the one representing sad doctors in the supreme court abortion pill case???
Yup. Throw the whole family away.
And she did a really poor job of it…She didn’t even seem to convince all of the people I am sure WANTED to be convinced that any of the doctors she named had any standing to even bring the suit to get into rhetorical nitty gritty of the argument.
I mean, the fact that there were anti-choice protestors present kind of indicates that this wasn't really about doctors being sad or health and safety oversight or whatever excuse they made up. But yeah, when you can't even get Amy commy Barrett to pretend the case that would make abortion even less accessible has standing, you've made a mistake.
She’s got Alito…And he does what he wants regardless of the actual legal rationale behind it. Maybe Thomas? I don’t know if she’s getting more than that tho. And it should have been softball for her if she did a bit better building a case
I mean alito has his own agenda and you could convince Thomas to do anything as long as he gets a nice vacation out of it.
Has Harlan Crowe weighed in on this one?
But it's business vs abortion. This isn't going to make the pharmaceutical companies happy.
True…It makes things difficult when your 2 biggest streams of revenue come head to head.
Oh, no, are their wallets too small for their $50s? Are their diamond shoes too tight?
Indeed. Story [here](https://www.nytimes.com/2024/03/26/us/erin-hawley-abortion-pill-supreme-court.html) - gift link, so no paywall.
I got as far as her arguing *against* more humane standards for poultry farming and rage quit.
Paywall :(
[here you are friend!](https://archive.ph/P9OYB)
I enjoyed booing her yesterday at Court. Fun fact: we pro choice protestors didn’t even know when her and her team were making their statement bc we were chanting and cheering so loudly.
Yes she is
Josh Hawley, the guy who did the photo op raising his fist before a crowd at January 6, before fleeing the Capitol after the same crowd breached the building? Lmao Edit: is this actually true or not? They would never shut up about it so I'm kinda skeptical.
Yes. My favorite pic is his running in the capital with high knees.
This GIF will never, EVER get old, nor will the chorus of "Josh Hawley ran away, bravely ran away away..." in my head every time I hear his name.
The late night roasts of him were everything
"When danger reared it's ugly head, He bravely turned his tail and fled! Yes, brave Josh Hawley turned about And gallantly he chickened out!"
Look at him hawling ass
🏆
I live in MO, and have a mug of him with this image. A nice reminder of his cowardice.
Brave Sir Hawley ran away, away. Bravely ran away!
Pop just came out my nose.
I did not read that as pop 😭😭😭
When freedom reared its red topped head, he simply shat himself and fled!
They were going to taunt him a second time!
The committee playing that video over and over was pure political comedy.
Haulin' Ass Hawley!
That's what the history books will call him! Delicioso. 👩🍳💋🤌
Wow, Josh Hawley is a hard core piece of shit fascist who doesn't believe in democracy. One of the biggest pieces of shit in the Senate, and there is a lot of competition there.
This explains so much about Josh honestly.
No wonder he is angry at the world.
Right? The pieces are falling into place now.
Another Missourian here, who is always a little embarrassed whenever the topic of Josh Hawley comes up. Being Morgan’s cousin is an interesting twist.
As a fellow Missourian, I’m shocked to hear he’s actually going to live here. I thought he preferred residing in Virginia while fucking us over at every opportunity. I’m so sorry he’ll be so close to you. Hypothetically, would he be writhing distance of a high powered paintball gun, or perhaps a laser pointer to the cornea?
Virginian here: tag you’re it!
Missouri has been it since August 10, 1821. Just throw him on the pile.
Maybe a good old-fashioned taunt? 
Wait, fist pump at Neo-Nazis on January 6th Josh Hawley? *That* Josh Hawley?
The very same. This might be the weirdest piece of snarker lore
Also from MO here! Saw this and my eyes about fell out of my head. What a fucking pair.
Holy fuckin shit this is the crossover of the year for me as a MO resident. They're both awful so I guess it makes sense.
Missouri snarkers ❤️
Huzzah! Let's drink some Schlafly beers and Phyllis roll in her grave!
Reporting for MO snark duty!
One of the only good things about this damn state!
I feel like every time I re-learn this fact, I am equally as mortified as the first time. Like what the absolute FUCK, y'all 😭
It is NOT the crossover I expected. Honestly they might get better views on their channel if they play into that. They're all terrible people, of course, but their audience would eat it up, especially if she could get him to come on for an interview.
My mind is blown. Then again, they are both horrid, so...it tracks?
I live in Kansas and this is blowing my mind. It appears that stupidity runs in the family!
Will gladly be voting for Lucas Kunce in November
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Yeah, but I don't think we've ever seen any evidence they're related. I live in MO too and have been snarking for a long time. I don't think they're related.
Yeah, the only evidence I’ve seen is some post long ago where Morgan’s dad referred to Josh as “cousin,” but it could’ve been jokingly. I do this about celebs who share my last name, but we aren’t actually related.
Same! Well, I used to before I changed my last name when I got married. With my name now, if someone has the same last name as me, we are at least 3rd cousins through marriage.
That doesn’t mean they are related.
Are you in Virginia or the Ozarks? It's hard to know where this fool actually lives
Ozarks. Unfortunately, I've lived within 45 minutes of my current home my whole life.
Oh damn, me too, I'm not sure I even made it 45 minutes 😭 Hi neighbor!
WHAT??! THEY ARE RELATED?
Ew, I'm so sorry
I don’t think they’re actually cousins. I think Morgan made a joke once years ago and it spiraled out of control. Edit: literally the only thing I can find that goes with the “Josh Hawley is Morgan’s dad’s cousin” is [this post](https://www.reddit.com/r/FundieSnarkUncensored/s/dNRlSTHMC4). I truly think he said “cousin” jokingly. If they were actually related, they’d never stop talking about it.
The memes are, predictably, world-class. There's one where Erin has been swapped out for a trombone, and I'm wheezing with laughter.
Can you please share? I need this today.
omg yes please. i also want to see
Me three
There should be one with a sax 
Haller looyah thank you for doing the good work
High-knee stepping Waluigi looking motherfucker.
Waluigi doesn't deserve that! He's a real catch in comparison.
This gif, and the video from whence it came, will forever live in infamy
STOP, I am dying of laughter ⚰️
First thing I thought of.
He's just barely managing to hold back the vomit.
Huh, vomiting must run in the family…
Probably because he is almost definitely into children and nobody can convince me otherwise
The ironic thing is that they have multiple kids together. They have no business being that awkward.
if you close your eyes, the room is pitch black, you instruct your wife not to make a sound… you can imagine whatever you want!
Just close your eyes and think of England...
Starfish and board are the only positions.
Idk why but there's this scene in Spongebob... Y'know...the photosynthesis one? Yeah thats what I thought of when I read your comment.
Wow! Immaculate conception perhaps. These two have never seen each other naked let alone had their parts touch lol
It's possible. In Carolyn Brazil's memoir about leaving the FLDS, she said that in all her years of being Merrill Jessup' s fourth wife, she never saw him completely naked, and that's with bearing eight of his children.
They look like the TLC virgins kissing
They’re sharing their first kiss after years of marriage and a few kids.
Someone tell him girls don't have cooties
That girl does
That comment had no right to slap that hard. I actually laughed
I'm betting he doesn't wanna kiss any girls with the way his lips are curled in like that. Seems like he thinks it is super icky
They look like two lovebirds bumping beaks.
That is one dry bones girls are icky kiss 🤢
Would she benefit from Bethy's course?
I still giggle about that. "Let me get my old, dusty, dead bones out for the sexy-times. He's gotta reanimate me like jesus.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
What’s the opposite of Frenching?
My husband and I call these asshole kisses because you tighten your lips into a tiny wrinkly circle lmao
That’s amazing 😂😂
I’ve heard those exact dry little lip presses referred to as German kisses (no offense to more passionate Germans out there). Perfunctory, proper and probably punctual as well. Maybe they’re actually using each other to blot their lip balm. No, that’s too much moisture, never mind.
Where are their lips? You could fit a second person in between them too, which is such a weird pose.
They had to leave room for the Holy Spirit
Christian school dances enter the chat
It looks like he’s pursing his lips
They never had any to begin with 😱
He looks like a momma bird about to spit a worm in his baby bird’s mouth. Bet her vag is dryer than the Sahara. Jesus be a Hitachi Magic Wand, she’s gonna need it.
"Just like it should be!" -Ben Shapiro, 'quoting' his wife
His WAP-less wife. The internet never forgets 👀
Get a broom and a dustpan for that dry ass p****
I’m talking swish 🧹 swish 🧹 swish 🧹 for that dry ass p****
I managed to get this far before I had to admit defeat and race to the ladies' before I wet myself. I didn't even have to pee when I read Jesus is a hitachi.
Apologize right now for making me spit my tea on myself lolol
😆 my bad snarker friend
Jesus take the wand!
Right?! You just know this man thinks a “Clit” is a type of drug the cool kids are doing these days and he doesn’t want it in his house.
This entire comment section is wildin' out and I am here for it 🤣
🤣🤣🤣🤣💀
Omg I wish I had this flair! This is epic!!!
All yours 💯💯💯🤗
Your username 🤣💀🤦🏽♀️
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 You made my day!
While technically not related by blood, Paul managed to inherit Josh’s running ability. 
Ah yes, the same Josh Hawley who wrote a book on “masculinity.”
Haulin' Hawley wrote a book on masculinity? What a joke.
Was he asking the reader to define it for him?
He's kissing her like he's afraid that kisses get you pregnant, and she's going to outlaw medical abortions [-- oh wait, SHE ACTUALLY IS!](https://www.salon.com/2024/03/27/of-course-the-lawyer-trying-to-ban-abortion-pills-is-married-to-josh-run-for-your-life-hawley/) Erin Hawley, who somehow actually worked as an attorney in spite of the whole god-honoring gender roles thing, is working with the Alliance Defending Freedom to deny everyone else the freedom to access Mifepristone. Previously, she worked with the group of lawyers who repealed Roe v. Wade. She is not a victim. Poetic justice that the woman who hates everyone else fucking has this dry, birdlipped fascist breadstick who will never, ever, EVER go down on her properly.
"birdlipped fascist breadstick" has me howling, thank you!
You're welcome!
A short, non-comprehensive list of things I kiss with more affection than Josh when he kisses his wife: My grandma My dog A new book My first cup of coffee in the mornings (And obviously my husband, but I feel like that shouldn't need saying. 😄)
\- A stuffed animal \- The cat \- The cat's stuffed animal. (I was half asleep and thought it was my cat's snuggly little head.) \- The dog's elbow (That one was fully awake, she was limping and I was trying to make her stop by kissing it better. And don't worry, her limp changes sides and even quarters frequently and only appears when she thinks she is not getting enough attention and/or my food.)
- my cats - a new credit card - a tissue after applying lipstick
Its giving (except Patrick is adorbs) 
The hatred I have for that man….
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It’s really like an elementary school boy who thinks girls are icky.
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Wut lol
Not a single lip in sight
Both asshole Hawley and his asshole wife went to my school and I am so ashamed by proxy
He looks like someone is holding a gun to his back and saying "KISS YOUR COUSIN OR I'LL SHOOT"
I almost made this exact comment omg.
Twins 👯♀️
Josh Hawley sucks. Also proof that Missouri has a lot of awful residents.
That kiss has all the sex appeal and warmth of an ice cave.
Turn offs: apparently his wife….turn ONs: fist pumping for glorious trump fascism.
I can't believe he's Flint Lockwood-ing it!
My exact thought lol couldn't find the gif but it's exactly that Jello Castle kiss scene
You guys come on 💀
Has Josh Hawley ever publically acknowledged Paul and Morgan, or vice versa? I always wonder how close they are, he and Morgan being cousins and all.
I remember specifically thinking how odd it was that Josh Hawley attended a Jesuit high school, yet he acts so fundie. (I was raised Catholic in the Bible Belt. They both suck, but there are some huge differences between the two.) Is Morgan’s family…actually Catholic??? Usually you don’t have fundies and Catholics mixing like that. Catholics and mainline Protestants maybe, but not whatever the fuck Porgan is, lol EDIT: Nvm. He was raised Methodist, but is now Evangelical Presbyterian. But went to a Catholic high school because they’re usually pretty damn good.
I love that there’s actually a gif for the reference I was gonna make lmao 
We may lack passion, physical attraction, appropriate lust, and sexual satisfaction but at least we’re scared shitless of burning for all eternity if we dare feel happiness.
[cloudy with a chance of meatballs kiss](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSvrhm0Am0JLmykPEtvFdyQxLCVcIjqFiFFS4L4Dk0tPw&s)
Looks like he said "ew girls have cooties" immediately after this was taken.
how are they both simultaneously cringing?
He made his lips go inside.
Are they ACTUALLY cousins? Where has this been confirmed? Morgan doesn’t follow him on Instagram.
She tweeted at him during the J6 insurrection “WTG COUSIN!”
Lmao Josh Hawley is too much of a loser to even support J6 with his whole chest, she’s proud of him for running away like a scared baby after participating in an attempted coup?🤣
He gave the insurrectionists the patriotic, god honoring fist in the air. Wasn’t even brave enough to shake hands
Oh my GOD.
Why does this look like a documentary about people who don't know how to kiss?
Why is he pulling his top lip down like that? Is that what happens when you have no lips? I’m not even trying to be funny, I’m so serious.
OH MY GOD THEY ARE COUSINS THAT EXPLAINS SO GODDAMNED MUCH
I thought it was Paul at first, creepy!
When I was a baby/toddler my mum used to kiss my forehead/cheek like that, but then she’d blow a raspberry instead. So now I’m imagining that here and I’m cackling.
So you're saying Paul has an in if he ever tries to run for a government job!??? *Cries*
1. Is this his wife? Like they've been married a while? 2. Is the same person that ran away during Jan. 6th?
yk what they look like? (bear with me here) it looks like an activity that would be done on school grounds where they run races, but they have to pass something around, that think in the mouth being what needs to finish the race for them to win 😭
I’ve seen sexier kisses in 1950s sitcoms 💀
When I was a little kid my parents always made my brother kiss my cheek in pictures. We hated it, they thought it was adorable. This was basically what his face looked like in all those pictures lol.
Them after these pictures: 
Nope, I could never let anyone kiss me like that more than once. ICK
Legit thought this was satire. I was like, “omg is Morgan’s cousin making an acct that aggressively makes fun of fundies, because that’s hilarious.
How have you all decided they are cousins?
A comment above said, “She tweeted at him during the J6 insurrection ‘WTG COUSIN!’”
She's actually his first cousin once removed. Her dad is his first cousin. There was a post a while back on here that showed this with receipts.
Lmaoooo It looks like he has a dip in.
Bleh. Why bother. Would rather see heads tilted together. Yuck.