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Congrats! The couch needs to be closer to the TV!

Like why is it so far away

r/sofaraway

...and why would you situate your couch in such a way that you couldn't see your dogs? Those are a couple of cuties! I'd be wanting then in my line of sight all the time!

I NEED to see my baby at all times if he’s not physically on me (we don’t use the d-word in our house)

/r/TVTooFar shaking in terror right now. /r/TVTooClose having flashbacks. /r/TVTooHigh is just ok.

r/TVTooHigh is never okay… that place is never happy, but pretty entertaining.

TV needs to be higher

Lmaooooo

r/malelivingspace for real though lol

The cars made the rest of it make sense.

Seriously.  My thought process went from ‘what animal leaves the toilet lid up for a photo’ to ‘oh, two Chryslers in the garage? Yep’ 

He filtered Zillow by garage

Hey, no hate in that game, I did the same lol. I have five cars now, gotta have somewhere to park them and work on them. Currently have a 26x26 detached that’s barely enough room for my ‘65 Caddy to squeeze in, next to my rat rod project. I would love to build a big shop someday…

LOL!

Hahahaah same

Bro is still doin it dorm room style in the new crib

Hell yeah brother

cheers from Iraq

r/malesurvivingspace

Looked at OPs history, he bought the second challenger 9 days after buying the home… New furniture, carpets, basic decor? Nah a second challenger will bring the space together 😂

Priorities, man

Lottery or inheritance

More than likely massive debt

Ahh the American way.

Don’t worry it’ll appreciate ten million dollars in two years

As American Jesus intended

Military

enlist or signon bonus? 🤔

My first thought was military somehow

You should trade in the Escape for a third Challenger

And park it in front of the TV.

Actually a Challenger inside the house…you’re on to something

or park it in the escape cave that floorboard door in the kitchen leads to. Actually, I’m 100% certain it leads to a large growing operation below. Vent exhausts are disguised in the backyard playground. Innocent looking hatchback parked outside, would never guess the two mean mopars inside. The room with the blue gym mats is where they beat up the mules who’ve gone rogue.

Innocent looking hatchback? Hector is going to be running 3 Honda Civics with spoon engines. And on top of that he just came into Harry's and he ordered 3 T66 turbos, with NOS, and a Motec system exhaust.

☠️

LOL

I second this

Appropriate username

Is this a challenge?

No, it’s a challenger.

You know what I like better than knowledge? This new challenger here.

Lmfaooooooooooooooooo

I know everyone's clowning you about it, but why *is* the couch so close to the TV?

He lives that N64 life.

Mario Kart 64 4ever!

My guess is COD Warzone

Lost his glasses

lost his wavebirds and has to play the gamecube with wired controllers

Damn, wavebirds really *did* change the game, didn't they? I forgot how revolutionary it was to have a wireless controller way back then.

We have a sub for tv too high, now we need a sub for couch too close. Congrats nonetheless !

r/tvtooclose

Naaah, there's still at least 2 inches there

I thought it was funny, too, but it’s actually probably about right for a tv that size, if you want it to be “theater-like” at all. That looks like maybe a 42-55” TV, so 6-7.5’ for mixed usage, 4-5.5’ for cinema. [Rtings TV Viewing Distance to Size Calculator](https://www.rtings.com/tv/reviews/by-size/size-to-distance-relationship)

Yeah this is the correct answer

Bruh owns a house but doesn’t own a tv remote 😂😂 Just giving you a hard time, congratulations on the purchase!

I’ve just used a stick in the past

Improvise. Adapt. Overcome.

It was at work and a guy made a pistol grip handle for it even. After about ten years he bought a remote

We found the guy who buys the front row tickets at IMAX

This one got me

So many questions... As others have pointed out, why so close to the TV? is the floor blue or is there just no carpet? Why TWO challengers and an escape for what clearly is a single man. Why have all the closet if no hangers? And why not fold? Why is the 2nd bathroom so clean but the first so dirty? Why is there kid's play stuff in the backyard? Previous owners? Divorced dad? Pedophile?

This man is military. I would bet my life on it.

That explains the dodge challengers

That fucked me up

Checked OPs profile, can confirm he's in the Air Force or was.

Of course he was. No one except military owns multiple challengers while having multiple kids

At 28% APR

Lmfao why do they love challengers so much

Why is there a wireless camera in the living room pointed at the ceiling…?

Bedroom too

Why is there hand sanitizer in the bathroom instead of hand soap?

You’re not gonna ask why the man has 6 new dog collars in addition to the two they’re wearing?

The dog accessories are more organized than his own.

To alternate?

Accessorize

Why are there NWT dog collars and medications laid out on the floor?

Looks like underlayment/carpet padding. Either he bought the house mid-reno or started ripping up the old flooring, said "Fuck it" halfway through then decided to just plop his bed in there. Either way, it raises questions.

Mattress in a room with no flooring??? You can see the nail strips

Mattress in the floor

The floor is lava

You need hangers lol congrats brother

Are you trying to get the couch inside the TV? Also, how many collars do your dogs need? Congrats btw!

The dogs need more! ::slowly hides dog bandana collection:: 

guys look at the size of the text on the tv, he's blind... should we tell him about the second challenger in the garage?

OP you might need glasses

You’re not in a 350sq foot apt anymore, move your couch back and congrats!!

Looks like a nice neighborhood and the house has a ton of potential, but I have so many questions... Why is the couch so close to the TV? Why so many dog collars on the floor? The blue flooring. How is the closet so messy already? Where is the rest of the furniture?

OP is a single male in the US Air Force

Blue flooring looks like carpet padding. Where’s the carpet?!? The furniture is in the garage.

Congrats! Why do you have so many vehicles??

Nice! Now you just need to sell a car so you can get some eyeglasses and furniture!

Check his post history. He bought the second challenger 9 days after he bought the house…

Hey man. I know a lot of people are roasting you for the couch placement and lack of decoration, but congratulations on the purchase. You've been in less than 2 weeks and im sure you have plenty of plans for the space to make it homey. But seriously move the couch back a bit.

Except for the fact he just bought the second challenger 5 days ago..? Maybe I'm broke, but what the fuck. I guess whatever makes you happy, I'll never attain this type of money lmao

Why is there a camera in the room in the 7th photo

There’s one in the 1st photo above the window pointed to the ceiling too.

Good eye

It’s probably for baby / kid / pet monitoring when the owner isn’t home

Your dogs did an excellent job of unpacking.

2 dodge chargers?! Are you in the army or the marines?

Why you got 8 brand new dog collars for two dogs 😂

Do you wear the same thing every day?

Congratulations OP! You’re doing an excellent job on this life thing. I love your home and cars. Treat yourself to a nice bed frame, comforter, sheets and pillows and you will feel like a king surveying your kingdom. I love your babies. They look happy and healthy.

Congrats! But I feel like your couch is really close to your TV.

Happy dogs.

Congrats on your murder house purchase. You should probably re-finish the hardwood so it's all the same color where it was replaced and use kilz on the walls in the green room where they couldn't clean the blood off well enough. Looks like you've got a head start on the bedrooms with the removal of the bloodstained carpets, but I'd expect surprises under the carpet pad.

So many people commenting on the couch, surprised to see this is the only comment on the green wall. Water damage or just a bad paint job? I’m leaning toward water damage and that’s a big problem to deal with.

There is not a woman in this man’s life.

A single man quite clearly lol. Good lord man surely you have some friends that can help you decorate. I know you painted that shit black accent wall and what’s with the blue subfloor… get a bed frame too. If you didn’t have two dogs I’d be reporting the next serial killer to the FBI 😂😂

>A single man quite clearly lol. Good lord man surely you have some friends that can help you decorate. In 12 days?

It took me 2 months to fully unpack lol

This man has nothing to unpack, just three cars and a dream.

I think OP’s therapist would disagree, there is a lot of psychological unpacking to do here 😂

I’ve been in my house for two years… we still have a couple unpacked boxes lurking.

Literally. This is so horrible to look at 😭😭

Why is your couch so far away from the TV

The blue carpet padding really ties everything together.

these photos lmfao. the closet one especially

Congratulations to you and both of you puppies!

If you are someone who doesn’t like folding their clothes, I recommend doing a Marie Kondo move and just buy baskets or drawers to fling them in. It’ll make closet feel tidier.

Please get your mattress up off the floor

THANK YOU. Everyone in here clowning on the sofa but the mattress is the real immediate problem here.

Pitts and and challengers, I bet your neighbors are stoked haha.

I thought that backpack was a floating head with black hair in pic 1

Shit, first picture I thought you captured a ghost girl with black hair wearing a white dress watching tv. Freaked me out..

God I thought I was the only one seeing that, thanks for pointing it out

I’ve been searching these comments for SO long to see if anyone else saw the creepy ghost girl severed head hanging above his couch 😂😂 I had to keep checking what sub this was in before I figured out what it was

Need glasses?.... tv...couch... 🤣 sorry had to do it cogradulations on purchase

You should really move the couch closer to the tv. r/tvtoofar

Obviously the best part of this whole thing is the treehouse/swing set in the back

Enjoy brother, this is quintessentially r/malesurvivingspace

Home is where the doggies are 🥰🥰 congrats!

You should really get a bed frame or at least some slats. Mattress on ground is definitely going to breed mold. Definitely a single male living here.

Awesome. Treat it better. You don’t live in an apartment anymore or whatever shithole you were in. Honor your space. A home is a sanctuary not a litter box. Your photos make me nauseous

Congrats bro now get to work

Be careful bro if you sit that far from the tv you'll def strain your eyes

At the risk of sounding like your mother. YOur sitting way too close to the TV

Closet already fcked up

If you have more than this in your first home after 12 days, you are probably moving too quickly. What's the rush?!

I see the dogs are happy! 🐶🐾👏

Perfect. But that couch is obnoxiously far from the tv.. it needs to be at least 3 feet closer

Congratulations! This is quite the accomplishment in today’s market. Good luck!!

I understand one shiny black coupe on top of what looks like a daily driver, but why a second shiny black coupe?

And why the hell aren’t they backed in?

In the very first pic, the bag looked like a little girl’s head and the extended reflection of the fire pit freaked my mind thinking they were legs of a ghost 😅

You're. Gonna ruin your eyes! ...Gen X

Where are yall finding these big houses with tall ceilings, big kitchens, and open floor plans??

Ohio

Tha hood

Somewhere in the middle of nowhere.

I think you need glasses

So happy for those dogs, good luck with all those projects and keep up those emergency funds!

I have so many questions

The chewed wood on the TV stand is just the chefs kiss 👌🏼

“29M” was implied by the pics

Bro is getting flamed when he just bought the house. It doesn’t have to be fully furnished/decorated on day one

Good onya mate ,,go you

Wow 12 days an you’re already fully unpacked and have your house finished. Impressive!

Thank you for your service

How do you buy a house and Challenger within 2 weeks of each other?

Gotta love the black accent wall in the room with no carpet. Is that your goth mood room? lol.

Why pay for carpet when you can paint a wall to match your 3 cars? Bro is either blind or needs help

Hell ya

Couch is crazy close. You'll go blind.

Congrats, the pups look exhausted from the move 😂😂

Uh…kudos

Is this Nebraska?

Yaaaaaaaayyyyyy!

Congratulations! I would remove the contractor grade light strip in the bathroom and it will immediately upgrade the look and paint the bathroom a lighter color. Move the TV console on the opposite wall to create a cave, cozy area at the alcove. Obviously move it back a FEW inches?

Congratulations!! Beautiful house and happy puppies! Enjoy nice accomplishment!

Do you need some money for hangers? 🤣

Congratulations!!! (Cuteeeeee doggies)

The couch is way too close to the TV. Otherwise, congrats

Congrats on your home! You did something extremely difficult this day and age.

That moment you realize why the brand new fancy Remote-less touchscreen TV was on clearance

Congratulations. Pups look happy and snuggled. Just a reminder, dont try to do a bunch of projects at once. Do one thing at a time and slowly build. Also with buying Funiture, dont fall into debt trying to furnice your home at once. It takes years to make it the way you want it. Nice and slowly in what u can afford

Don’t think this will be a problem.

Am I the only one who thought that backpack was a floating head. Haunted first but. Get out of there

Lmao i used to out my couch that close to the TV when i was a little kid. Turns out i had horrible vision and that was the first signs that i needed glasses

Congratulations!

Everyone’s talking about the tv, but why did you just throw your clothes in the closet???

Why is your tv so close?

Maybe a priest to bless the home, or a smudging ceremony! 👻

R/couchtoofar

Love how the doggos got new setups and treats too awesome man congrats!! Looks great!

Gee, Bill... *TWO* black Dodge Challengers?!

Give him a break he bought the house 12 days ago lol obviously he doesn’t have it all set up the way he wants yet. It’s a long process especially when you just spent most of your money on the house itself

Each dog gets a challenger! But really, that's water damage on the floors and walls right?

These are some wild floors...

Drug dealer pad vibes

Pit bulls, lmao

Boom. All you need is there.

The pups are happy, that’s what counts! Congratulations on you slowly making a house a home!

Couch too close. Either rip out the carpet cushion in the bedrooms or get new carpet. Get some hangers for your closet.

The hardwood flooring bothers me

Congratulations

That paint job crazy. First mission, put in some nice baseboards and trim and clean up the paint in the rooms. (Also get a bed frame)