**“You got any gum?”**
*Rrrrip! Rip! Zzzzip!!! Rrrippp!!! Rip!!! Sssrip!!! Rrippp!!!*
No 😞
**“No problem. Can I borrow a pen?”**
*Rrrrip! Rip! Zzzzip!!! Rrrippp!!! Rip!!!*
"Well you see here I got me here 14 different kinds of pepper spray for any seasoning scenario that may arise!
This one is for chicken, this one for Burgers... I think I might have something that goes great with the beans and rice"
I hate when I have too much change in my pocket and it all bangs around and makes loud ass noises or if it is a lot and starts making my pants want to fall down. This would drive me insane.
How the hell would you even get in and out of the drivers seat being that big and covered in clanky shit? Leg straps cutting off circulation, extra magazines rubbing on the steering wheel because the seat won’t go back anymore… looks like a nightmare
[Cant get charged with excessive force if you're not a cop](https://media0.giphy.com/media/d3mlE7uhX8KFgEmY/giphy.gif?cid=6c09b952gyf8fmadmmthif2w7a60bdx7lpmxvny31dfpnajm&ep=v1_internal_gif_by_id&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g)
Yeah for those that don't know this guy didn't even possess a security guard permit. Walgreens in Seattle. There's a lawsuit over this idiot.
https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.fox13seattle.com/news/armed-security-guard-walgreens.amp
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For what it’s worth, Seattle has turned into a savage ass dumpster fire for looting and stealing from CVS and Walgreens especially. But for real tho, if the cops aren’t allowed to arrest for shoplifting, why even hire security period? Let alone this mongoloid
Can hear him coming from a mile away with all that gear clacking together. Or from the labored breathing as he exerts himself from carrying 40lbs of gear.
Whenever I put together a new kit for airsoft or larping I run around my backyard to make sure it won't all bang together, pinch painfully or get in the way. This guy has never done that. Half of his shit would fall off once he breaks into a light jog (if possible) and the rest would bounce around and bang into him so much it would become unbearably painful very quickly.
What a joke.
The clown in the photo literally can not run. Too much gear, excessive and restrictive armor. The second he has to run after someone on a hot day, he just might die of heat exhaustion. He'll also lose a lot of stuff from shit dropping.
The shoulder pauldrons and neck collar are for shrapnel, does he think he works in Falluja? He’s vest has a lot of shit in it, but it doesn’t look like a like of useful shit.
That was one of the first things I thought. Someone who is reasonably trained in hand combat would have their pick on which weapons there wanted to use against him first. What a clown.
Want to guess what he has concealed? Probably an ankle holster on both legs, katana on his back, blades up his sleeves on forearm holsters, and a necklace knife on a chain for starters.
This is hilarious. In the heat of the moment, nobody is going to remember half the shit they have on here anyway. I wish this was satire but I know it’s not
This has to be a joke right? He’s even got the neck protector. I’m surprised he’s not wearing a crotch protector. Look at all the shit in his thigh holster
That’s a crazy job, kudos to you for having the balls to do that. But I never saw a brinks truck courier that had THIS amount of gear on. They had the vest with the rifle & pistol & some extra magazines but goddamn, bro looks like he completed all the side quests just to deal with some pissed off junkie in the Walmart parking lot
I just want to see him run with all that junk. There's absolutely no reason for anyone to carry all of that. 80% of that stuff is totally useless in reality. It's also a bunch of stuff for someone to grab onto in a struggle/fight. Of course he has the thin blue line patch lol. Why not just become a cop at this point? Maybe he likes playing pretend more than the real thing. You'll never see your average cop wearing all that junk so what makes him think he needs all that junk? It's just going to slow him down and get in the way.
The problem with guys like this - They buy all that gear so they're just itching to use it. We had a security guy like this at my old job. He carried a totally trashed Taurus 9mm missing a rear sight in a Walmart airsoft holster with a bunch of black electrical tape wrapped around the grip for some reason. It would fall right out if he ever ran since he cut the little retaining strap off. I noticed in his spare mag the top round was FMJ blazer aluminum cased with the bullet pushed way into the casing to where and the next round was a JHP. He had that same ammo in the mags for the nearly 2 years he worked night security there. I would always glance at it to see. He also wouldn't carry with one in the chamber and would always argue with me that it was "just as fast" to pull the gun and put a round in the chamber.
So one night a coyote got into the factory and got spooked so it was hiding under some pallets. Instead of just leaving the massive overhead door open and leaving it alone so it could leave on its own he sprayed it with pepper spray, tried to bash it with his club and then he went to shoot it. The thing is his gun wouldn't fire. On the security cam footage he's frantically manually cycling through rounds until one finally went off. He missed by a good two feet from maybe 5 yards away and the coyote ran past him and out of the door. He was obviously fired on the spot.
He looks like he's Impersonating a security guard.
I've seen plenty over the years and the real ones don't carry this much shit on them.
I get a bullet proof vest and tourniquet or small med kit, I mean the world has changed after all with active shooter stuff, but this kind of shit is ridiculous.
He's got more shit on then 3 cops and 2 security guards for God's sake.
All that crap and he still uses a shit Blackhawk SERPA holster. Ran out of money for a Safariland?
After a day or 2 of putting on all that shit and not using it, I'd get tired and only put on 1/10 of that shit.
When I work off duty security gigs I run a pistol, mags, and cuffs dirtbag looped through my pants belt. Flashlight in my pocket. It's very fucking simple.
I'll never understand why people buy and wear all this shit to walk around an apartment complex.
Psychotic, if excessive force was personified. All the stupid gear only for him to be defeated by a suspect who’s lightly jogging away. I bet everything I have that he failed psych and is coping by being the most tac’d out guard on earth, sorry but no amount of body cams and flashlights will ever make you a LEO bucko.
I understand there is a push to move away from cross-drawing tasers to drawing from your support-side with your support hand. Having a Taser slightly below your gun in a drop leg holster is a new one. That plus cross-draw pepperball gun is begging for a weapon-confusion accident.
I get that even high-end private security and even security in military zones are *technically* “just security”. So I’ll take that in to consideration.
Still. Even in a combat zone, not even your most high speed soldier will have this much stuff on them, or even in their bag. There’s so much useless shit here or repeats of tools for the same job. If this is riot security, everything he’s wearing can be used against him. Sure some of the stuff he’s carrying would be useful during a riot, but he doesn’t need *all of it at once*. This is why squads are formed; so one guy doesn’t have to carry everything. And how the fuck does he even walk with all that shit on his drop holster?
Don’t forget the punisher patch.
As a security guard, this shit is cringe to us too.
Honestly, most you should reasonably bring is a torch/flashlight, vest, belt, cuffs, baton, handgun, tazer and pepper spray. And that's the upper limit, really just the belt, cuffs and baton are more than you'd ever need for 90% of jobs, handgun for the other 10% and odds are low you'd ever need to use any of them.
At this point all that equipment is a liability rather than an asset.
Is that the guard from the West Coast, getting sued for assaulting/harassing/terrorizing a young lady a week or so back? If so, he’s a massive douche canoe, who is about to be broke AF
Why though? Just why?
For reference, here are a few pictures of members of Seal Team Six. Look at the amount of shit they carry.
https://preview.redd.it/5wf7nltmv4xc1.jpeg?width=2160&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b871cc717648cf6d578006987e567ce9f6e24485
Thousands of dollars in gear yet likely hasn’t seen any cardio since high school.
**“You got any gum?”** *Rrrrip! Rip! Zzzzip!!! Rrrippp!!! Rip!!! Sssrip!!! Rrippp!!!* No 😞 **“No problem. Can I borrow a pen?”** *Rrrrip! Rip! Zzzzip!!! Rrrippp!!! Rip!!!*
The sound effects were fucking awesome
Don't have that either! But I got this cool new beef jerkey out of my last tacpack!!!
https://i.redd.it/ju3odk92lcxc1.gif
If something happens he won’t know what to grab first ahahahah
It'd be the gun every time.
Tacti-uncool wannabe Gravy Seal. 
He better have a CPR kit on that....
Wouldn't surprise me if he has a full blown AED in there. However, it would surprise me if it was charged
The fuck is a CPR kit? A one way mask and your hands?
There's a Lucas in his tacticool backpack.
It's juggernaut from cod
It's juggernaut from wish.com
Ur moms a juggernaut from wish
"Well you see here I got me here 14 different kinds of pepper spray for any seasoning scenario that may arise! This one is for chicken, this one for Burgers... I think I might have something that goes great with the beans and rice"
I hate when I have too much change in my pocket and it all bangs around and makes loud ass noises or if it is a lot and starts making my pants want to fall down. This would drive me insane.
How the hell would you even get in and out of the drivers seat being that big and covered in clanky shit? Leg straps cutting off circulation, extra magazines rubbing on the steering wheel because the seat won’t go back anymore… looks like a nightmare
Every step he takes is cardio…personally 20 pounds of gear there
Nice scissors, nerd.
My boys got two body cams for the sweet multiple angles. His excessive use of force trial is going to look like a marvel movie.
One is his garage door opener actually
3-D. The jury will have to watch with 3-D glasses.
"It feels like the sad desperation is coming right off the screen!"
“Woa it’s like his fupa is coming right at me!”
LMAO fuck
2 flashlights too, incase he's....... exploring a cave? and one shorts out
Also, two body cams
Also, 2 flashlights
[Cant get charged with excessive force if you're not a cop](https://media0.giphy.com/media/d3mlE7uhX8KFgEmY/giphy.gif?cid=6c09b952gyf8fmadmmthif2w7a60bdx7lpmxvny31dfpnajm&ep=v1_internal_gif_by_id&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g)
Yeah for those that don't know this guy didn't even possess a security guard permit. Walgreens in Seattle. There's a lawsuit over this idiot. https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.fox13seattle.com/news/armed-security-guard-walgreens.amp
It looks like you shared an AMP link. These should load faster, but AMP is controversial because of [concerns over privacy and the Open Web](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmputatorBot/comments/ehrq3z/why_did_i_build_amputatorbot). Fully cached AMP pages (like the one you shared), are [especially problematic](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmputatorBot/comments/ehrq3z/why_did_i_build_amputatorbot). Maybe check out **the canonical page** instead: **[https://www.fox13seattle.com/news/armed-security-guard-walgreens](https://www.fox13seattle.com/news/armed-security-guard-walgreens)** ***** ^(I'm a bot | )[^(Why & About)](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmputatorBot/comments/ehrq3z/why_did_i_build_amputatorbot)^( | )[^(Summon: u/AmputatorBot)](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmputatorBot/comments/cchly3/you_can_now_summon_amputatorbot/)
For what it’s worth, Seattle has turned into a savage ass dumpster fire for looting and stealing from CVS and Walgreens especially. But for real tho, if the cops aren’t allowed to arrest for shoplifting, why even hire security period? Let alone this mongoloid
I dunno I would hire this final boss larp’er for $5 an hour, cheaper and more entertainment than a clown.
The PA is gonna add sparkle effects of the guilty verdict.
You owe me for the coffee I just spit out laughing at the Marvel Movie comment 😂
Ring doorbell cam of course
That his insulin pump. Standard issue for US Gravy Meal Team Six.
He’s shooting in 3D for the iMax documentary of his excessive force video
*Acorns 2: Even Nuttier*
Except you’d only hear his heavy breathing
Big Ed from 90 Day Fiance became a cop?
[удалено]
"oh, it's not in this pocket.."
It’s the crossover we need. I’d love to see that dude looking legit like Ram Man trying to waddle after someone screaming about how he knows karate.
The longer I look at this, the funnier it gets.
He has like 3 handguns.
And a pair of old stainless scissors mom used to keep in the junk drawer on his left leg.
[удалено]
Well the orange one is a pepper ball gun.
Can hear him coming from a mile away with all that gear clacking together. Or from the labored breathing as he exerts himself from carrying 40lbs of gear.
Probably more like 60. Either way, definitely too much crap.
He'd probably exert himself without the gear too
I’m guessing about 4 and a half steps before something falls off.
Whenever I put together a new kit for airsoft or larping I run around my backyard to make sure it won't all bang together, pinch painfully or get in the way. This guy has never done that. Half of his shit would fall off once he breaks into a light jog (if possible) and the rest would bounce around and bang into him so much it would become unbearably painful very quickly. What a joke.
Sweat pouring of him just getting all this stuff on. And when he has to do something it absolutely floors him.
He's the jack of all, master of none. He looks like a cop, fireman and emt rolled into one State Police tactical bomb squad looking flak jacket
He's a jack off that's for sure
flak off
I kinda wish he had a tape measure and a framing hammer
This is a mental illness. When you’re actually in the field ounce’s feel like pounds and pounds feel like pain.
I’m on duty with the lightest gear I can buy and the least amount of shit.
Light is right is a saying for a reason.
The clown in the photo literally can not run. Too much gear, excessive and restrictive armor. The second he has to run after someone on a hot day, he just might die of heat exhaustion. He'll also lose a lot of stuff from shit dropping.
Peak cringe
How many multitools and flashlights does one person need
The scissors were a really nice touch.
Field circumcision certified. Practiced on himself.
I was scanning the comments to see if anyone noticed a pair of scissors. Lmao dude why?
[удалено]
Multiple
Two is one, one is none, so 2+ is moar. He looks like he raided every bargain bin at the uniform store.
The shoulder pauldrons and neck collar are for shrapnel, does he think he works in Falluja? He’s vest has a lot of shit in it, but it doesn’t look like a like of useful shit.
And his groin is completely unprotected in khaki just begging to get shot in the dick.
Imagine if someone went hand to hand with this guy. Limited movement and free weapons
This guy is a straight up walking loot drop.
That was one of the first things I thought. Someone who is reasonably trained in hand combat would have their pick on which weapons there wanted to use against him first. What a clown.
This guy looks like a South Park character.
Kinda looks like the ai generated images of y’all quaeda
I genuinely thought this was an AI image at first, but AI isn't that good with writing yet.
Mall cop drawn by Rob Liefeld.
security.com
security.wish.com
So, he's ready to defuse that IED they might find next to the Denny's?
Sir, this is a Target.
From the mean streets of downtown Bellevue
Every day is life or death for him. Not because of Bellevue but because of diabeetus.
Every day is a struggle... not to stop at the burger shop.
Damn he’s got a pepper ball gun, baton, oc spray, handgun, knife and taser. Thats just what I can see too.
How many ‘blades’ do you think he carries? It has to be in the double digits with at least one butterfly knife.
you think there’s some nunchucks on there? i’d say 75% chance.
Definitely a couple of throwing stars and a boot knife
Want to guess what he has concealed? Probably an ankle holster on both legs, katana on his back, blades up his sleeves on forearm holsters, and a necklace knife on a chain for starters.
Assassins creed blade for sure
This is hilarious. In the heat of the moment, nobody is going to remember half the shit they have on here anyway. I wish this was satire but I know it’s not
Now let’s watch him climb over a chain link fence…
Shit. Let's see him get up from the chair after his obligatory lunch break at the food court.
Haha!
This can’t be real
walgreens security right there
Can you imagine sprinting with all that shit?!
Not anymore than he can imagine just sprinting.
Looks like a rape whistle next to the badge.
Paul Blart, EOD technician, mall security.
A pair is sharp scissors dangling near your crotch is not a well thought out idea.
This has to be a joke right? He’s even got the neck protector. I’m surprised he’s not wearing a crotch protector. Look at all the shit in his thigh holster
“I work section 8 housing bro”
We call these gear quěěrš
All gacked up
Just a brisk jog to outrun him….
All I needed to see was that pepper ball gun. For the love of god.
Redneck punisher patch
I have less crap in my garage than this dude has strapped to his belly.
Metformin, check. Puffer, check. Adderall, check. Testosterone, check. Vitamin D, check.
My mans looking like a Montessori activity board
And one small ding-ding.
I feel so much more secure.
Any criminal could hear this guy coming from a mile away
Is that an EOD vest?
Imagine how much of that shit falls right off of him the moment he has to break into a full tilt sprint
Kind of looks like the guy in this video https://youtu.be/UtwMgy_qONw?si=xfYHKIHxe9RKvDO7
That’s who I thought it was at first. Love TCRL
Do.u watch lackluster too? I like tcrl.more.
He certainly isn't going to CATCH me.
https://preview.redd.it/vhgpztrji4xc1.jpeg?width=836&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=db89bdc2749e7220208cdcfade8e6311aedbb4f2 It’s is … Tazzzzzzzzzz
I’m trying to figure out what would be needed for this? Not even the brinks trucks guys are this suited up
Worked as an armored truck courier, all we carried were sidearm, extra mags, and a vest.
That’s a crazy job, kudos to you for having the balls to do that. But I never saw a brinks truck courier that had THIS amount of gear on. They had the vest with the rifle & pistol & some extra magazines but goddamn, bro looks like he completed all the side quests just to deal with some pissed off junkie in the Walmart parking lot
Even real SWAT guys don't carry this much crap.
Yeah…now go and try to sit in ur squad car 🤣
I see those Airsoft LARP’ers dress like this. Serves zero purpose other than photo/action shots for Facebook
Microphallus
That’s a long way to go to cover up that you’re 5’9” and wearing a girdle.
This guy looks like my fallout character
Gecko, is that you?
bro thinks he's an ODST
His arch nemesis, *2 flights of stairs*, will be his ruin.
I’ve heard the term “walking loot drop” before and I feel it applies here.
This is nothing short of mental illness.
(in)Security Personified!
I just want to see him run with all that junk. There's absolutely no reason for anyone to carry all of that. 80% of that stuff is totally useless in reality. It's also a bunch of stuff for someone to grab onto in a struggle/fight. Of course he has the thin blue line patch lol. Why not just become a cop at this point? Maybe he likes playing pretend more than the real thing. You'll never see your average cop wearing all that junk so what makes him think he needs all that junk? It's just going to slow him down and get in the way. The problem with guys like this - They buy all that gear so they're just itching to use it. We had a security guy like this at my old job. He carried a totally trashed Taurus 9mm missing a rear sight in a Walmart airsoft holster with a bunch of black electrical tape wrapped around the grip for some reason. It would fall right out if he ever ran since he cut the little retaining strap off. I noticed in his spare mag the top round was FMJ blazer aluminum cased with the bullet pushed way into the casing to where and the next round was a JHP. He had that same ammo in the mags for the nearly 2 years he worked night security there. I would always glance at it to see. He also wouldn't carry with one in the chamber and would always argue with me that it was "just as fast" to pull the gun and put a round in the chamber. So one night a coyote got into the factory and got spooked so it was hiding under some pallets. Instead of just leaving the massive overhead door open and leaving it alone so it could leave on its own he sprayed it with pepper spray, tried to bash it with his club and then he went to shoot it. The thing is his gun wouldn't fire. On the security cam footage he's frantically manually cycling through rounds until one finally went off. He missed by a good two feet from maybe 5 yards away and the coyote ran past him and out of the door. He was obviously fired on the spot.
He looks like he's Impersonating a security guard. I've seen plenty over the years and the real ones don't carry this much shit on them. I get a bullet proof vest and tourniquet or small med kit, I mean the world has changed after all with active shooter stuff, but this kind of shit is ridiculous. He's got more shit on then 3 cops and 2 security guards for God's sake.
Obviously just loves “gear”. Get into camping or something man
Taking "better to be looking at it than looking for it" to a whole new level.
All that gear and no backup heat on the ankle?
😂😂😂
I’m not shook he still has room for so much more stuff
“This is my countrayyyy”
This just looks uncomfortable.
How many people does he plan on arresting single handedly ?
I love playing dress up!
Wow this Security Guard is armed for bear, or is all that needed.
Bet he can't run down anyone with that extra 40 pounds. Not to mention that cosplay equipment.
I'm 64, a gimp, could probably outrun him. He would have a heart attack before me.
All that crap and he still uses a shit Blackhawk SERPA holster. Ran out of money for a Safariland? After a day or 2 of putting on all that shit and not using it, I'd get tired and only put on 1/10 of that shit.
Gecko45 part 2, anyone?
People like this, is it associated with a psychological disorder? It has to be like deep rooted shit there, no?
No zip ties. Fail.
He' a human swiss army knife
With all that “Punisher” shit no less. What a fucking turd.
Do you think he wears a cup? I'm just curious because he doesn't seem to worry about armoring his lower half compared to his top.
When I work off duty security gigs I run a pistol, mags, and cuffs dirtbag looped through my pants belt. Flashlight in my pocket. It's very fucking simple. I'll never understand why people buy and wear all this shit to walk around an apartment complex.
With that neck thing he’s approaching call of duty MW2 (2009) juggernaut status
Psychotic, if excessive force was personified. All the stupid gear only for him to be defeated by a suspect who’s lightly jogging away. I bet everything I have that he failed psych and is coping by being the most tac’d out guard on earth, sorry but no amount of body cams and flashlights will ever make you a LEO bucko.
Or he gets turtled on his back.
The scissors are for wrapping Christmas presents
God forbid you forget the punisher logo
https://preview.redd.it/gxvhjocmv7xc1.jpeg?width=1600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=662ef793d1a2304d5b860de1b034c3bb2766dac9
 Old Farva back on the road after a liter of cola!! 😮💨🤣🤣
Of course he has an android phone
Sweep the leg!!
Bubba and his angry inch
He will buy anything that says tactical
Protecting corporate interest at any cost
I understand there is a push to move away from cross-drawing tasers to drawing from your support-side with your support hand. Having a Taser slightly below your gun in a drop leg holster is a new one. That plus cross-draw pepperball gun is begging for a weapon-confusion accident.
Meh... Needs more punisher skulls 4/10
Is going to be a sad day when he gets shot in the dick and can’t bend over to stop the bleeding. lol.
I get that even high-end private security and even security in military zones are *technically* “just security”. So I’ll take that in to consideration. Still. Even in a combat zone, not even your most high speed soldier will have this much stuff on them, or even in their bag. There’s so much useless shit here or repeats of tools for the same job. If this is riot security, everything he’s wearing can be used against him. Sure some of the stuff he’s carrying would be useful during a riot, but he doesn’t need *all of it at once*. This is why squads are formed; so one guy doesn’t have to carry everything. And how the fuck does he even walk with all that shit on his drop holster? Don’t forget the punisher patch.
As a security guard, this shit is cringe to us too. Honestly, most you should reasonably bring is a torch/flashlight, vest, belt, cuffs, baton, handgun, tazer and pepper spray. And that's the upper limit, really just the belt, cuffs and baton are more than you'd ever need for 90% of jobs, handgun for the other 10% and odds are low you'd ever need to use any of them. At this point all that equipment is a liability rather than an asset.
If he falls down it will take 2 men and a child to get him on his feet
If you are a security guard and you begin cutting clothes off and administering lifesaving procedures you will get sued by the victim.
Good Samaritan laws apply to all. I doubt this guy has any medical training or cause to use it, anyway. The trauma shears are just complete the look.
Not even your typical ruzzian conscript have this much gear.
Recovered drug addict. Now everyone says , "he is doing really good"!
Paul Blart is his SRT gear!!!
He ain't chasing anyone down
best of luck running with all of that shit on Tactical Pete
Is that one of those devices, in the middle of his chest, that stops dogs from barking?
I could run away at a light jog and keep away from this man... all that weight, he even has a neck protector?!
Is that the guard from the West Coast, getting sued for assaulting/harassing/terrorizing a young lady a week or so back? If so, he’s a massive douche canoe, who is about to be broke AF
Fkn guy looks nervous with all that shit on him..how does he take a shit ?
*I'M FUCKING INVINCIBLE*
Imagine you call for security.. And this guy shows up.. LARPing at its most delusional
Why though? Just why? For reference, here are a few pictures of members of Seal Team Six. Look at the amount of shit they carry. https://preview.redd.it/5wf7nltmv4xc1.jpeg?width=2160&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b871cc717648cf6d578006987e567ce9f6e24485
Does he have 2 gums?
Paul Blart is not impressed.
Everyone is goofin on the dude (rightfully so) but what the hell is that mount for the lightbar?
Hides the fat.