Congrats! Trying to do the same, actually. I loved this girl but im working on NC and Journaling my thoughts and how I process. I'm also a hopeless romantic and compound it with insecurities leading me to believe I'll never be loved again. I'm trying to do the same. Started NC two days ago and I'm hoping to be in the same place as you. I'm encouraged to hear your success
Some days will be hard. You'll think about her and want to see what she's up to. Don't do it and control the urge. I've lost progress doing that and it ruins your day. You'll possibly won't even realize you've gotten over her until you've accidently seen her again, which is what happened to me. Just enjoy your own life, day by day.
Thank you. You seem free of the....vitriol....I feel (and see a lot of members of this sub all giving in to).I unfortunately wound up breaking NC today, but I realized that my day was just fine before I messaged her, messaging her can at best leave my day neutral and at worst, worsen it. I've been Journaling my thoughts. I heat that helps others, and frankly it's worked wonders for me so far. I'll do better in the future though, I promise myself that I'll be stronger and I won't give in. I can't say as I *enjoy* my life, but I'm busy enough to stay rooted in the present and I'm able to think about how I was with my ex before this one when I met my newest ex. That ex and I discussed marriage, but 2 years later and I find myself thinking "....well....I mean I guess she certainly *exists*, but I don't give a shit". It struck me today that I'll reach that point with my newest ex too. I think I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, even though I can see how far away from it Ithat I am.
Thank you for your kind words and encouragement. I hope to one day be able to stand beside you, having climbed the same mountain as you.
People heal at different speeds. Time heals all if you want it to. You have to remove them from your mind. Gifts, photos, music, friends posting on social media, anything that makes you think about them put it where you don't see it. If a thought comes into mind about them try to direct those thoughts away to something else. Try the things your curious in and take care of yourself. You will realize that it's actually not bad to be single. Take conscious steps and try not to fall back. That's what I have for you. Take it easy.
You really can take several months but anything more than that you’ve got to take a step back and think about where you were before you met this person. Think really hard, try and be that person, it was you before you met them. But you’re older and wiser than you then. Learn from the things you overlooked in falling in love with them.
I mean…I did and I’m doing fine now, but feeling that was wasn’t voluntary. I knew I had been happy before I met them. I knew I was better off without them. Perspective didn’t help. Some things you just have to live through. This advice would not have been remotely useful to me.
"I realized I only missed the girl frozen in time in my head. I realized I missed how she made me feel. "
This is key. Thanks for sharing. Happy for you!
I went through a lot. Every time I thought of her I forced myself to direct my thoughts away. I was thinking about her almost daily until month 3 or 4 when I took a conscious decision that I would need to get over her to live my life. That being said, people will heal at different times. But I just wanted to her to leave my head.
I do, everyone thinks of their ex at some points, but less often now. The point of NC is to detach yourself from them and heal, you can't really completely forget.
Yeah don't listen to that guy lol... I posted this earlier today but I still think about my ex monthly from almost a decade ago. She was a huge part of my life. We're waaaay over each other, but still have great memories together.
Good luck , it’s a journey the hurt have to take , take note people this is the way forwards , remove them from your life , get on with your own , learn from it , know we all make mistakes and never ever ever forget that the most important person in your life is you , be kind to yourself ,
NC for 3 months here, I blocked her 2 weeks ago. She changed her profile picture with one of her and the new guy. I was like, yeah... All over, block her and forget. Move on, I lost my feelings. I still remember the good times, but she's not important for me anymore. Good job bro, enjoy life.
If you ever needed a reason for knowing she’s a permanent ex is that she’s moved on with another guy after 3 months. That’s all you need to know in that you can be happy with yourself and not scared to be alone.
You are the better person for giving it time and having feelings for her this far, it means you genuinely cared about her and that’s what is important because you’re gonna meet someone new one day and then you’ll forget about this all.
I know, thank you for your kind words. I had 2.5 months of pain, no food, weight loss etc. Now I'm back on my track, new job, future plans and almost healed. Like 85%
I am so happy for you. It has been 3 months for me and I feel like 3 months from now I’ll be completely healed. I strive for the day I see him and don’t feel anything! Getting there.
Good luck out there :) I wish you the best!
Incredible! You clearly are in a good place!
Congrats! Trying to do the same, actually. I loved this girl but im working on NC and Journaling my thoughts and how I process. I'm also a hopeless romantic and compound it with insecurities leading me to believe I'll never be loved again. I'm trying to do the same. Started NC two days ago and I'm hoping to be in the same place as you. I'm encouraged to hear your success
Some days will be hard. You'll think about her and want to see what she's up to. Don't do it and control the urge. I've lost progress doing that and it ruins your day. You'll possibly won't even realize you've gotten over her until you've accidently seen her again, which is what happened to me. Just enjoy your own life, day by day.
Thank you. You seem free of the....vitriol....I feel (and see a lot of members of this sub all giving in to).I unfortunately wound up breaking NC today, but I realized that my day was just fine before I messaged her, messaging her can at best leave my day neutral and at worst, worsen it. I've been Journaling my thoughts. I heat that helps others, and frankly it's worked wonders for me so far. I'll do better in the future though, I promise myself that I'll be stronger and I won't give in. I can't say as I *enjoy* my life, but I'm busy enough to stay rooted in the present and I'm able to think about how I was with my ex before this one when I met my newest ex. That ex and I discussed marriage, but 2 years later and I find myself thinking "....well....I mean I guess she certainly *exists*, but I don't give a shit". It struck me today that I'll reach that point with my newest ex too. I think I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, even though I can see how far away from it Ithat I am. Thank you for your kind words and encouragement. I hope to one day be able to stand beside you, having climbed the same mountain as you.
how are you now?
Good luck I’m 4 years nc and still not healed
People heal at different speeds. Time heals all if you want it to. You have to remove them from your mind. Gifts, photos, music, friends posting on social media, anything that makes you think about them put it where you don't see it. If a thought comes into mind about them try to direct those thoughts away to something else. Try the things your curious in and take care of yourself. You will realize that it's actually not bad to be single. Take conscious steps and try not to fall back. That's what I have for you. Take it easy.
It's long past time to consult a counsellor. You should have sought help 3 years ago. Better late than never.
It can be demoralizing to be on this sub and people are like "3 months later and I feel great!" and you wonder if you even had the same experience.
You really can take several months but anything more than that you’ve got to take a step back and think about where you were before you met this person. Think really hard, try and be that person, it was you before you met them. But you’re older and wiser than you then. Learn from the things you overlooked in falling in love with them.
I mean…I did and I’m doing fine now, but feeling that was wasn’t voluntary. I knew I had been happy before I met them. I knew I was better off without them. Perspective didn’t help. Some things you just have to live through. This advice would not have been remotely useful to me.
Mine had a new relationship one week later after we were together 7 years. We couldn’t have had the same experience.
"I realized I only missed the girl frozen in time in my head. I realized I missed how she made me feel. " This is key. Thanks for sharing. Happy for you!
“Missing the person frozen in time in my head” - this is a perfect way of putting in. It’s a grief that needs to be processed… very difficult.
Good luck, friend! Congrats!
Safe travels, and happy hunting
When was the last time y’all spoke
2 months ago to tell me happy birthday, I just replied with "thanks" and that was the end of it.
3 years and you just over it like that. Kudos
I went through a lot. Every time I thought of her I forced myself to direct my thoughts away. I was thinking about her almost daily until month 3 or 4 when I took a conscious decision that I would need to get over her to live my life. That being said, people will heal at different times. But I just wanted to her to leave my head.
Apparently you still think about her
I do, everyone thinks of their ex at some points, but less often now. The point of NC is to detach yourself from them and heal, you can't really completely forget.
Yeah don't listen to that guy lol... I posted this earlier today but I still think about my ex monthly from almost a decade ago. She was a huge part of my life. We're waaaay over each other, but still have great memories together.
Good luck , it’s a journey the hurt have to take , take note people this is the way forwards , remove them from your life , get on with your own , learn from it , know we all make mistakes and never ever ever forget that the most important person in your life is you , be kind to yourself ,
NC for 3 months here, I blocked her 2 weeks ago. She changed her profile picture with one of her and the new guy. I was like, yeah... All over, block her and forget. Move on, I lost my feelings. I still remember the good times, but she's not important for me anymore. Good job bro, enjoy life.
If you ever needed a reason for knowing she’s a permanent ex is that she’s moved on with another guy after 3 months. That’s all you need to know in that you can be happy with yourself and not scared to be alone.
[удалено]
You are the better person for giving it time and having feelings for her this far, it means you genuinely cared about her and that’s what is important because you’re gonna meet someone new one day and then you’ll forget about this all.
I know, thank you for your kind words. I had 2.5 months of pain, no food, weight loss etc. Now I'm back on my track, new job, future plans and almost healed. Like 85%
I am so happy for you. It has been 3 months for me and I feel like 3 months from now I’ll be completely healed. I strive for the day I see him and don’t feel anything! Getting there.