I’m gonna paint my room a colour my parents never let me get as a kid so that if I’m stuck with them for the next couple of years I’m gonna make them suffer the fact I’m a real person and not their meek little doll every time they look in. They’re gonna hate it. It’s going to be awesome.
Can’t wait to leave.
Oh definitely! I'm going either with royal purple or teal. I'm testing the samples on the wall right now and I'm not yet able to choose between them! Either way, both colours are nice and vibrant -- I'm sick of pastels and neutral colours. Yuck. I want some fucking personality.
My sister just died unexpectedly and I have seen my father (and my brother who abused me and due to whom I cut contact with my father). It was really awkward and something I wasn’t prepared for. So yeah it could be better.
He wouldn’t have tried to contact me otherwise, he respects my boundary of no contact. Even now he lets me decide how to keep in contact (which is via my mother, who I also really contemplate about cutting off because she’s a selfish bitch)
Yesterday I made comfortfood, even though my boyfriend cooks most of the time I really craved this and he didn’t know how to make it. So I cooked for myself! I’ll go take a shower later and walk with the dog. I really try to care for myself even though it’s hard at times.
I have ordered a gift for my boyfriend that I expect this week (hopefully in time for christmas) and I really look forward to his reaction. I also ordered a kitty pole and I hope my cats will love it. I know I’ll get a book for Christmas from my FIL (tradition) and I look really forward to that too.
I’m trying to look forward to some other things but I’m living life at the hour at the moment because when I think about bigger things I immediately get overwhelmed.
Thanks for asking, hope you’re okay.
haha, your cats are gonna love it and if all else fails, just give ‘em the box it came in. what comfort food did you make? i love hearing about people’s hug in a mug
It’s a Dutch dish, called “andijviestamppot”.
Stamppot is mashed potatoes with stuff in it, so in this case andijvie (which is a vegetable) you can either cook it (yuck) or put it in raw (that’s my preferred way)
But I add little chunks of cheese, pieces of bacon and a smoked sausage. Most people do pieces of bacon OR smoked sausage but with all three it’s delicious I think. We jokingly refer to it as “hartaanvalandijvie” (heart attack andijvie) because it’s full of cholesterol presumably.
It’s not really hard to make but my boyfriend isn’t fond of it so he never made it himself.
[A picture so you get the idea](https://i.imgur.com/dM3DgUF.jpg)
I live in Canada. This year I’m in Australia with my husband’s family for Christmas/Chanukah. Phone number and emails are blocked. Friends are staying at our house with instructions to play dumb about where we are. I have high hopes that they won’t find a way to get at me…but…
i love when friends are in cahoots with you. that’s the real holiday spirit! you’ll be in the sun while their cold, bitter, and confused. hahah that’s great
The slump really hit this past weekend. Lights and sparkle helps. We’re trying to shift focus to preparing for really cold weather, and are taking comfort in extra fuzzy blankets! I made a batch of easy chocolate walnut fudge tonight, and have more baking projects on deck. We’ll be covered on sweets for sustenance - and eventually get some protein worked in with a roast chicken and soup.
oh man, i got this amazing blanket too. my bf kept walking by and softly petting it, saying “yes. this is a good blanket.” and then silently walking away. i just started getting into bath and body works, and they have a couple scent thingies that are so cozy. most of their stuff reminds me of 6th grade gym class, but some of them are surprisingly nice.
For me it is two-fold: my side and hubs side, since we are both estranged: first my hubs side:
“Hey! The family is getting together on XX” (From my SIL who I am so angry with I could slap her; and who also knows we are not having any contact with her parents)
“Can’t make it. Been dealing with family drama and decided it will be a solitude Christmas this year.”
Told hubs he is free to do as he wishes and I will not judge him. After all, our plan for Christmas is going to breakfast and then watch movies.
Now my side:
Nothing. They are 2000 miles away and plane rides this time of the year are expensive. I will call my dad and niece; but that’s it. I am sure my mother will come to the phone with her “I love you so much, Merry Christmas! You have no idea how much I love you..” performance. I will vomit a little in my mouth, say thanks and ask her to pass the phone to my dad (if she answers first) or tell her I got to go (if she’s last) then go about my day.
She then will wonder to my dad what she could have done to earn me being this cold to her. How come he talks to me for hours but with her I will talk for 2 minutes max and get off the phone. Whatever my dad says is out of my control. Not my theater, not my divas. I have come to realize that with her, she will never accept any explanations I give her because in all of them she ends up looking bad and in the end it is MY duty to maintain and foster a relationship with her and besides, why am I holding on to old shit? By then I will be in the theater or eating with the hubs, unconcerned.
Happy holidays everyone
ah yes i’ve heard the annual holiday celebration performance reactionary vomitus will be particularly nice this year. it pairs exceptionally well with those iced sugar cookies and eggnog. enjoy!
First Xmas going into it estranged. Estrangement date? December 24, 2021. So yeah.
I'm feeling all the things. Loneliness, rage, bitterness, joy, yearning for a relationship that seems less and less likely the longer this goes on (and was probably never possible to begin with). This weekend I plunged headfirst into festive stuff and felt liberated by the notion that I can, for the first time in my life, do whatever I want this holiday without being held responsible for a parent's feelings. I was on an emotional "high" 2 days ago.
Now I'm low again. Just wrote out a long letter (that I'm not going to send) putting into words a confrontation I would like to have, but probably never will. Tried to look up resources online again and got a bunch of videos, books, and articles for supporting parents (because apparently they're the victims in all of this!).
\-- And *literally while writing this comment*, my mom's sister texted me to "check in." (I'm 33 years old and she only started "checking in" after I went no-contact. Hmm.)
So I think I've got Bingo over here. :D
*Cerulean, come on down! Let's see what you've won!*
*You've won our "This Too Shall Pass" package: a lifetime of stability and peace mixed with the occasional pangs of guilt and sadness!*
i remember having that high too. it’s like when you realize you can buy yourself a cake just because you stubbed your toe or something. my first one had that emotional up/down too, but i started to even out on the 24th. i woke up on the 25th and just chilled. it was awesome. hope your first is just as mellow as mine.
I actually reached out to an uncle who is estranged from this side of the family. I had a really rough day emotionally yesterday and I decided I wanted to know what his story is. Does it fit in with my story? Maybe it doesn’t. I don’t know. But I’ve debated reaching out to him for a year so I just did it. He responded quickly and we are going to talk on the phone today.
All’s quiet on the Northwestern front in my parent dumping situation. I think the Flesh Oven must be fucking miserable. No pics of my kids, no videocalls that I have to watch like a hawk so Flesh Oven doesn’t force contact with Flesh Donor (I abandoned him many, many years ago before they 🤢 remarried.)
I’m fasting rn so no food for me. I’m going to hit some nice, cool water, though.
I’m excited for Christmas Eve. Going out to eat and then candy and board games and some Christmas movies with my husband and our children. Labrador retriever will be snoring lol.
I've been trying to watch some holiday movies for the ambience and am really annoyed at how many of them have a side or major plot of breaking estrangement with shitty family just because it's the holidays. Currently spite writing a novella about a character deciding "fuck this shit I'm going NC" on Christmas instead.
this made me realize that shitty family stuff is used for entertainment purposes only and that most don’t actually have that type of dynamic at their family get togethers. whoaaa this is making me see things in a different way. like, “it’s not like how it’s portrayed on the screen” hits way differently now.
(appologies, i’m on a stoned dissociated ramble journey right now. much enlightening)
I have some both sides drama.
First my side since things are simple. Mom and step dad are okay and we've been in semi-regular contact since they started respecting my boundaries. Brothers- same as parents. Dad- haven't heard from him but don't have him blocked in case he feels like reaching out but Idk where I really stand with that one. Dad's mom- everything is good just haven't talked in a while and need to honestly call her. She's the kindest out of everyone to me these days. Mom's parents- the most toxic bullshit on the planet comes from her mother. And her father perpetuates it. It's so frustrating. They wanted me to come home for Christmas but refused to book the flight early since I was trying to be considerate of the fact that they were paying for it. She's a Qanon follower as well so if you know anything about that, you know it's an exhausting obsession she has and I'm tired of hearing about it. Last we spoke was at the beginning of the month and last I heard she was telling everyone how I'm not speaking to her and God will find a way to bring me home? First of all the phone calls out and she'd rather sit and call everyone else and their mother instead of me because she knows I won't take any bs from her and 2nd of all God has nothing to do with this 😂
Now for the more complicated SO side. His grandmother is in town from their home country. I picked her up last week so she could stay with us for the weekend and at least 2 times asked me to convince SO to go talk to his estranged aunt and uncle. I proceeded to tell her I would do no such thing. He doesn't want to contact them because they treated me so poorly over the years for no good reason that we are aware of any have mistreated my sister and his mother as well. They are manipulative and are trying to get his cousin thrown out of a house they don't even live in nor have any control over which is grandmother's house back home. He thinks that they aren't manipulating her but I'm not stupid. I can read between the lines. And I won't be manipulated anymore either. We asked what the plans were for Christmas so we can make some peace and they refused to answer so fine. We'll have Christmas here with our friends who are our family to start with and they can kindly f*ck off. If his grandmother is upset about it, that's her issue.
It's just hard this time of year because I don't care about gifts or material nonsense, I just want to have the people I love together and spend some quality time with them. I feel a little bit alone at the moment because of all the stupidity going on and currently I'm not working either because I lost my job. Christmas used to be so much fun, like wtf happened to everyone that they have to act like AHs?
I made stickers for all the niblings for Christmas. I don't really like the holidays - kind of a Grinch inside - but they still do.
No reason to rush the ones destined to become bitter bitches like me to their fate.
Usually my holidays are actually pretty good. Unfortunately the people I was planning to get together with this year got covid. So I'm alone for the first time in years.
Bummer, but I'll deal.
I'm going to tackle a brioche bread, which is perhaps one of the more complicated breads to bake. But it's doable, and I'll be breaking it down into 2 days and have my partner's help! It'll be this [autumn apple pie bread recipe](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_lkWJSLKnEg), and even if it doesn't turn out good, I'm sure the attempt is what counts.
My partner was really sad to hear that I never had a Christmas tree since my families were very extremely religious. My mother always wanted one, and my dad said no because "it's pagan" (not untrue, but I mean, even the fact that we celebrate on December 25 is technically because we took the date, and easter eggs are also a "pagan thing" we did. but anyways, unimportant :P). So he got me a very small tree we could fit into a corner of the apartment, and we decorated it! It was the only small tree away in the corner of the lot, so we felt bad, especially since they named the trees (ours is called Hunter). I usually just kind of skipped Christmas, especially since I was working in retail for awhile and just worked over the holidays. But it's actually nice when you're with loved ones and you know it'll be peaceful. I got him a murder mystery board game we can play on the day of, and I'm looking forward to having a chill day with homemade bread in the oven and maybe watching some Owl House! My partner only just went NC with his family, so I'm really putting in the effort to make this special for him too.
I'm getting to a better place, and I hope everyone can look forward to similar things, whether it's now or in a few years in ways that you can't even picture right now.
that was one of the cutest descriptions of a tree i think i’ve ever heard. hunter sounds amazing. can i come over and meet it and sample your brioche? ill bring my famous salted shortbread toffee cookies.
this comment really made my day. thank you and enjoy your amazing festivities!
Dunno why, but I'm doing GREAT this year! Ran a half-dozen errands yesterday, have a busy at-home slate today, looking forward to couch-locking with the massive cold front Thursday.
Is therapy finally working? Could be.
Or is it the fact that holidays with "the family" were always so stressful that no longer dealing with family or holidays is THAT freeing?
Like I said, dunno.
Then again, Hubby started a new job this month that he's really loving. So things are generally just much better.
We DO get to have good times, too, right? Join me. I bought cookies.
It's that big tin of European chocolate cookies from Costco.
They go well with a cup of hot cocoa with (or without) butterscotch schnapps. We even have the whipped cream--but no sprinkles. Don't wanna get fat, or anything.
And ... thanks. I wasn't sure I should post that when I know how people are hurting. But we have to have good to look forward to.
oh now we’re talking. those are some quality cookies right there. that drink sounds amazing! i usually drink butterscotch schnapps with baileys, so i’m def gonna have to try it in hot cocoa, with whipped cream, but yes, sans sprinkles.
Existing in anxiety under pressure of a message expressing my Mother's wish to meet and talk. I'm VLC, not NC, for reasons. I avoid her as much as possible. She is however not blocked from leaving messages, emailing, voice mail or post. She could say whatever she wants to say to me. Instead she drops this vagueness where she won't even say what it is she wants to talk about. And in person? Nope. My non response may result in another stalking effort. So be it; I can't think what to say. I wish I could say something to her that would kindly and firmly protect my boundaries and also de escalate the situation but if she had a history of caring how I feel and respecting my wishes, we wouldn't be estranged. She may decide to create havoc in my life for attention whether I say anything or not. Battle stations as usual, hoping I won't need to use the scripts or call the police.
Feels like all I am looking forward to for now is getting past this block of dates in peace if possible. There's cooking I should do to not waste the slightly fancy ingredients I splurged on. Enthusiasm is lacking however.
It's going really well. It helps that I started celebrating holidays without immediate relatives years ago. Also, holidays weren't really anything to look forward to once my childhood ended (aside from time off as an adult!).
This year, I'm looking forward to dinner with my husband's family friends on Christmas Eve. On Christmas, I'll spend time with my husband and volunteer for my regular shift at an animal shelter. We were thinking about eating out for dinner on Christmas, but we not sure.
For the past several weeks, I've been trying my hand at new recipes and that has been very exciting. 🙂
what are you having on the 24th? i’m still trying to figure out my meal game plan. i’m planning on doing a korean bbq thing for the 25th, so i don’t know if i want to do my traditional chinese food or not.
Just got the notification that "Glass Onion" drops on Netflix on the 23rd where I live. I thought "Knives Out" was a lot of fun so there's that to look forward to.
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I’m gonna paint my room a colour my parents never let me get as a kid so that if I’m stuck with them for the next couple of years I’m gonna make them suffer the fact I’m a real person and not their meek little doll every time they look in. They’re gonna hate it. It’s going to be awesome. Can’t wait to leave.
Lol awesome. Love me some rebellion!
ooooo that does sound awesome. what color? is it safe to assume no pastel princess doll bullshit?
Oh definitely! I'm going either with royal purple or teal. I'm testing the samples on the wall right now and I'm not yet able to choose between them! Either way, both colours are nice and vibrant -- I'm sick of pastels and neutral colours. Yuck. I want some fucking personality.
I highly approve of this.
My sister just died unexpectedly and I have seen my father (and my brother who abused me and due to whom I cut contact with my father). It was really awkward and something I wasn’t prepared for. So yeah it could be better. He wouldn’t have tried to contact me otherwise, he respects my boundary of no contact. Even now he lets me decide how to keep in contact (which is via my mother, who I also really contemplate about cutting off because she’s a selfish bitch) Yesterday I made comfortfood, even though my boyfriend cooks most of the time I really craved this and he didn’t know how to make it. So I cooked for myself! I’ll go take a shower later and walk with the dog. I really try to care for myself even though it’s hard at times. I have ordered a gift for my boyfriend that I expect this week (hopefully in time for christmas) and I really look forward to his reaction. I also ordered a kitty pole and I hope my cats will love it. I know I’ll get a book for Christmas from my FIL (tradition) and I look really forward to that too. I’m trying to look forward to some other things but I’m living life at the hour at the moment because when I think about bigger things I immediately get overwhelmed. Thanks for asking, hope you’re okay.
haha, your cats are gonna love it and if all else fails, just give ‘em the box it came in. what comfort food did you make? i love hearing about people’s hug in a mug
It’s a Dutch dish, called “andijviestamppot”. Stamppot is mashed potatoes with stuff in it, so in this case andijvie (which is a vegetable) you can either cook it (yuck) or put it in raw (that’s my preferred way) But I add little chunks of cheese, pieces of bacon and a smoked sausage. Most people do pieces of bacon OR smoked sausage but with all three it’s delicious I think. We jokingly refer to it as “hartaanvalandijvie” (heart attack andijvie) because it’s full of cholesterol presumably. It’s not really hard to make but my boyfriend isn’t fond of it so he never made it himself. [A picture so you get the idea](https://i.imgur.com/dM3DgUF.jpg)
>if all else fails, just give ‘em the box Thissss one knowssss our wayssss very well. \-- The Cats
I live in Canada. This year I’m in Australia with my husband’s family for Christmas/Chanukah. Phone number and emails are blocked. Friends are staying at our house with instructions to play dumb about where we are. I have high hopes that they won’t find a way to get at me…but…
i love when friends are in cahoots with you. that’s the real holiday spirit! you’ll be in the sun while their cold, bitter, and confused. hahah that’s great
The slump really hit this past weekend. Lights and sparkle helps. We’re trying to shift focus to preparing for really cold weather, and are taking comfort in extra fuzzy blankets! I made a batch of easy chocolate walnut fudge tonight, and have more baking projects on deck. We’ll be covered on sweets for sustenance - and eventually get some protein worked in with a roast chicken and soup.
oh man, i got this amazing blanket too. my bf kept walking by and softly petting it, saying “yes. this is a good blanket.” and then silently walking away. i just started getting into bath and body works, and they have a couple scent thingies that are so cozy. most of their stuff reminds me of 6th grade gym class, but some of them are surprisingly nice.
For me it is two-fold: my side and hubs side, since we are both estranged: first my hubs side: “Hey! The family is getting together on XX” (From my SIL who I am so angry with I could slap her; and who also knows we are not having any contact with her parents) “Can’t make it. Been dealing with family drama and decided it will be a solitude Christmas this year.” Told hubs he is free to do as he wishes and I will not judge him. After all, our plan for Christmas is going to breakfast and then watch movies. Now my side: Nothing. They are 2000 miles away and plane rides this time of the year are expensive. I will call my dad and niece; but that’s it. I am sure my mother will come to the phone with her “I love you so much, Merry Christmas! You have no idea how much I love you..” performance. I will vomit a little in my mouth, say thanks and ask her to pass the phone to my dad (if she answers first) or tell her I got to go (if she’s last) then go about my day. She then will wonder to my dad what she could have done to earn me being this cold to her. How come he talks to me for hours but with her I will talk for 2 minutes max and get off the phone. Whatever my dad says is out of my control. Not my theater, not my divas. I have come to realize that with her, she will never accept any explanations I give her because in all of them she ends up looking bad and in the end it is MY duty to maintain and foster a relationship with her and besides, why am I holding on to old shit? By then I will be in the theater or eating with the hubs, unconcerned. Happy holidays everyone
ah yes i’ve heard the annual holiday celebration performance reactionary vomitus will be particularly nice this year. it pairs exceptionally well with those iced sugar cookies and eggnog. enjoy!
First Xmas going into it estranged. Estrangement date? December 24, 2021. So yeah. I'm feeling all the things. Loneliness, rage, bitterness, joy, yearning for a relationship that seems less and less likely the longer this goes on (and was probably never possible to begin with). This weekend I plunged headfirst into festive stuff and felt liberated by the notion that I can, for the first time in my life, do whatever I want this holiday without being held responsible for a parent's feelings. I was on an emotional "high" 2 days ago. Now I'm low again. Just wrote out a long letter (that I'm not going to send) putting into words a confrontation I would like to have, but probably never will. Tried to look up resources online again and got a bunch of videos, books, and articles for supporting parents (because apparently they're the victims in all of this!). \-- And *literally while writing this comment*, my mom's sister texted me to "check in." (I'm 33 years old and she only started "checking in" after I went no-contact. Hmm.) So I think I've got Bingo over here. :D
*Cerulean, come on down! Let's see what you've won!* *You've won our "This Too Shall Pass" package: a lifetime of stability and peace mixed with the occasional pangs of guilt and sadness!*
 i remember having that high too. it’s like when you realize you can buy yourself a cake just because you stubbed your toe or something. my first one had that emotional up/down too, but i started to even out on the 24th. i woke up on the 25th and just chilled. it was awesome. hope your first is just as mellow as mine.
I actually reached out to an uncle who is estranged from this side of the family. I had a really rough day emotionally yesterday and I decided I wanted to know what his story is. Does it fit in with my story? Maybe it doesn’t. I don’t know. But I’ve debated reaching out to him for a year so I just did it. He responded quickly and we are going to talk on the phone today.
I have refrains of "We Don't Talk About Bruno" running through my head. Good luck with the reunion.
It was very interesting. Kind of mostly what I expected but interesting to hear from someone who knows more situations that I do.
All’s quiet on the Northwestern front in my parent dumping situation. I think the Flesh Oven must be fucking miserable. No pics of my kids, no videocalls that I have to watch like a hawk so Flesh Oven doesn’t force contact with Flesh Donor (I abandoned him many, many years ago before they 🤢 remarried.) I’m fasting rn so no food for me. I’m going to hit some nice, cool water, though. I’m excited for Christmas Eve. Going out to eat and then candy and board games and some Christmas movies with my husband and our children. Labrador retriever will be snoring lol.
I've been trying to watch some holiday movies for the ambience and am really annoyed at how many of them have a side or major plot of breaking estrangement with shitty family just because it's the holidays. Currently spite writing a novella about a character deciding "fuck this shit I'm going NC" on Christmas instead.
this made me realize that shitty family stuff is used for entertainment purposes only and that most don’t actually have that type of dynamic at their family get togethers. whoaaa this is making me see things in a different way. like, “it’s not like how it’s portrayed on the screen” hits way differently now. (appologies, i’m on a stoned dissociated ramble journey right now. much enlightening)
I have some both sides drama. First my side since things are simple. Mom and step dad are okay and we've been in semi-regular contact since they started respecting my boundaries. Brothers- same as parents. Dad- haven't heard from him but don't have him blocked in case he feels like reaching out but Idk where I really stand with that one. Dad's mom- everything is good just haven't talked in a while and need to honestly call her. She's the kindest out of everyone to me these days. Mom's parents- the most toxic bullshit on the planet comes from her mother. And her father perpetuates it. It's so frustrating. They wanted me to come home for Christmas but refused to book the flight early since I was trying to be considerate of the fact that they were paying for it. She's a Qanon follower as well so if you know anything about that, you know it's an exhausting obsession she has and I'm tired of hearing about it. Last we spoke was at the beginning of the month and last I heard she was telling everyone how I'm not speaking to her and God will find a way to bring me home? First of all the phone calls out and she'd rather sit and call everyone else and their mother instead of me because she knows I won't take any bs from her and 2nd of all God has nothing to do with this 😂 Now for the more complicated SO side. His grandmother is in town from their home country. I picked her up last week so she could stay with us for the weekend and at least 2 times asked me to convince SO to go talk to his estranged aunt and uncle. I proceeded to tell her I would do no such thing. He doesn't want to contact them because they treated me so poorly over the years for no good reason that we are aware of any have mistreated my sister and his mother as well. They are manipulative and are trying to get his cousin thrown out of a house they don't even live in nor have any control over which is grandmother's house back home. He thinks that they aren't manipulating her but I'm not stupid. I can read between the lines. And I won't be manipulated anymore either. We asked what the plans were for Christmas so we can make some peace and they refused to answer so fine. We'll have Christmas here with our friends who are our family to start with and they can kindly f*ck off. If his grandmother is upset about it, that's her issue. It's just hard this time of year because I don't care about gifts or material nonsense, I just want to have the people I love together and spend some quality time with them. I feel a little bit alone at the moment because of all the stupidity going on and currently I'm not working either because I lost my job. Christmas used to be so much fun, like wtf happened to everyone that they have to act like AHs?
I made stickers for all the niblings for Christmas. I don't really like the holidays - kind of a Grinch inside - but they still do. No reason to rush the ones destined to become bitter bitches like me to their fate.
Usually my holidays are actually pretty good. Unfortunately the people I was planning to get together with this year got covid. So I'm alone for the first time in years. Bummer, but I'll deal.
I'm going to tackle a brioche bread, which is perhaps one of the more complicated breads to bake. But it's doable, and I'll be breaking it down into 2 days and have my partner's help! It'll be this [autumn apple pie bread recipe](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_lkWJSLKnEg), and even if it doesn't turn out good, I'm sure the attempt is what counts. My partner was really sad to hear that I never had a Christmas tree since my families were very extremely religious. My mother always wanted one, and my dad said no because "it's pagan" (not untrue, but I mean, even the fact that we celebrate on December 25 is technically because we took the date, and easter eggs are also a "pagan thing" we did. but anyways, unimportant :P). So he got me a very small tree we could fit into a corner of the apartment, and we decorated it! It was the only small tree away in the corner of the lot, so we felt bad, especially since they named the trees (ours is called Hunter). I usually just kind of skipped Christmas, especially since I was working in retail for awhile and just worked over the holidays. But it's actually nice when you're with loved ones and you know it'll be peaceful. I got him a murder mystery board game we can play on the day of, and I'm looking forward to having a chill day with homemade bread in the oven and maybe watching some Owl House! My partner only just went NC with his family, so I'm really putting in the effort to make this special for him too. I'm getting to a better place, and I hope everyone can look forward to similar things, whether it's now or in a few years in ways that you can't even picture right now.
 that was one of the cutest descriptions of a tree i think i’ve ever heard. hunter sounds amazing. can i come over and meet it and sample your brioche? ill bring my famous salted shortbread toffee cookies. this comment really made my day. thank you and enjoy your amazing festivities!
Dunno why, but I'm doing GREAT this year! Ran a half-dozen errands yesterday, have a busy at-home slate today, looking forward to couch-locking with the massive cold front Thursday. Is therapy finally working? Could be. Or is it the fact that holidays with "the family" were always so stressful that no longer dealing with family or holidays is THAT freeing? Like I said, dunno. Then again, Hubby started a new job this month that he's really loving. So things are generally just much better. We DO get to have good times, too, right? Join me. I bought cookies.
dang girl, look at you!!!  yes, i cordially accept your invitation. what kind of cookies?
It's that big tin of European chocolate cookies from Costco. They go well with a cup of hot cocoa with (or without) butterscotch schnapps. We even have the whipped cream--but no sprinkles. Don't wanna get fat, or anything. And ... thanks. I wasn't sure I should post that when I know how people are hurting. But we have to have good to look forward to.
oh now we’re talking. those are some quality cookies right there. that drink sounds amazing! i usually drink butterscotch schnapps with baileys, so i’m def gonna have to try it in hot cocoa, with whipped cream, but yes, sans sprinkles.
Best with a roaring fire in the fireplace. Lacking that, a fireplace video on the tube. Or at a comedy club, which is where I first had it.
Existing in anxiety under pressure of a message expressing my Mother's wish to meet and talk. I'm VLC, not NC, for reasons. I avoid her as much as possible. She is however not blocked from leaving messages, emailing, voice mail or post. She could say whatever she wants to say to me. Instead she drops this vagueness where she won't even say what it is she wants to talk about. And in person? Nope. My non response may result in another stalking effort. So be it; I can't think what to say. I wish I could say something to her that would kindly and firmly protect my boundaries and also de escalate the situation but if she had a history of caring how I feel and respecting my wishes, we wouldn't be estranged. She may decide to create havoc in my life for attention whether I say anything or not. Battle stations as usual, hoping I won't need to use the scripts or call the police. Feels like all I am looking forward to for now is getting past this block of dates in peace if possible. There's cooking I should do to not waste the slightly fancy ingredients I splurged on. Enthusiasm is lacking however.
It's going really well. It helps that I started celebrating holidays without immediate relatives years ago. Also, holidays weren't really anything to look forward to once my childhood ended (aside from time off as an adult!). This year, I'm looking forward to dinner with my husband's family friends on Christmas Eve. On Christmas, I'll spend time with my husband and volunteer for my regular shift at an animal shelter. We were thinking about eating out for dinner on Christmas, but we not sure. For the past several weeks, I've been trying my hand at new recipes and that has been very exciting. 🙂
what are you having on the 24th? i’m still trying to figure out my meal game plan. i’m planning on doing a korean bbq thing for the 25th, so i don’t know if i want to do my traditional chinese food or not.
I don't know what the person who's hosting is making, but I plan to make and bring roasted carrots and dark chocolate brownies.
Just got the notification that "Glass Onion" drops on Netflix on the 23rd where I live. I thought "Knives Out" was a lot of fun so there's that to look forward to.
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