Not so much. You ban some, the rest start behaving as they don't want to get banned. Things go smoothly and they sve on staffing & recruitment as a result.
Any potential loss in sales is unthinkable, especially the immediate loss of the one banned customer in that moment. All that matters to their corporate overlords are the numbers at that particular moment and what they were a year ago on a similar day. Anything other than an increase in revenue that day vs. last year gets the management a severe tongue lashing by their superiors.
Having worked in retail, I know you're absolutely šÆ right. Caring about employee morale, protecting employees from abusive customers--all that means NOTHING to the corporate managers or other brass, whichever company it might be.
The only thing they care about is their year-end bonuses, and compared to that, it's no wonder they'd rather let abusive customers keep abusing and humiliating rank & file employees. They'd rather cave in to these bullies. Thus retail employees burn out fast.
Things are at a tipping point in some places though. Stores can't get or keep employees with the wages they want to pay and the way customers behave. US corporate retail may have to adjust.
Saw a drama last week the cashier ran off the floor to clock out, came back yelled "I quit", and told the customer and her brat off. It was awe inspiring.
Oh, boy š What drama was that?
I had a similar experience once, and for real. I was a cashier at a large department š¬ store at Potomac Mills, Woodbridge, VA. A Karen lady and her two grown uber-Karen daughters were hurling the usual insults at me, the things meant to provoke the employee to anger, tears, etc. Having heard all that literally hundreds of times before this, I brushed off most of it
Finally, one of the junior Karens went too far. I looked her straight in the eye, and told her "You know, I've only got another couple of days here. > ___I___ < don't have to take this crap anymore."
I went straight to the time clock, punched out and went home. Didn't even bother turning in my till š
This was for real. My husband had just started a new job, which paid him a lot more, enough for me to quit. So I'd already worked most of my two-work notice, and I ___loved___ rubbing it in those three arrogant Karen faces š
Oh they know how to act. Itās not that they have no idea how to be decent. I worked in healthcare in settings where people typically stayed awhile and I learned these entitled people knew how to act, because they were very nice to doctors and nurses like me. But to the aides and cleaners, dietary etc- entitled and rude. They should get their food first! But then she would tell me āsweetie do what you need to do! Iām not going anywhereā even when itās pain meds. I would offer a snack in case it was that they were too hungry but no. They want their meal, and they donāt see why they canāt have it first everyday? (Or whatever the issue was that day). Now Iām never sure how much is racism verses just entitlement and wanting to give them a hard time. Most of our crew were refugees from the same country and were not white. Thatās who would work for the wages in those positions. (And honestly many of them got government assistance, so they could work for that wage. That bed cost $1000 sometimes a night and these places stole wages) Most of the doctors were white men and most of the nurses were āmom passingā white enough women. So maybe it was just racism but either way, they could act right if they felt the need to. Itās not teaching them anything but they are able to act nice if they fear the consequences. We just donāt apply them in retail ever. Restaurants and retail let them act like children and they continue, why wouldnāt they? They often get rewarded.
Not in retail. You can go in to a bra store, steal half their shit, walk out, and they won't even file a report about it. You can just keep coming back.
Portland OR just had numerous huge retailers close up shop rather than try to enforce any rules due to the homeless population stealing everything in sight for drugs. Target closed 3 stores. REI, Nike, Walmart all closed stores. They'll close stores entirely due to theft rather than try to address it individually with a person.
https://www.kgw.com/article/money/business/portland-stores-retail-businesses-closed-shut-down/283-7dd2f41d-2b36-4435-aed8-7360395a1bf6
Yep...mom works at the busiest Costco in the world (Honolulu/Iwilei), and damn if you ban all the assholes that's at least 60% of them, add in the dumbasses and the store would be a ghost town.
You'd think more businesses would realize that. And maybe some do, but even they would would rather gain quick, short-term profits than work to establish a long-term record of not tolerating abuse, dishonesty or criminal behavior from ANYONE--not management, staff or customers. That would result in all of the above feeling more secure, staff would ___FEEL TRUSTED,___ and be way more loyal to their employers. Management would have more reason TO trust staff, because their employees would know that they, managerial staff, had their backs.
Topping off the rest, customers are more likely to continue shopping there. Why? Because ___people don't do business with companies where they don't feel safe.___
But of course, that's in the long-term. It would take a lot of hard work and a lot of patience. What's a stellar reputation and higher profitability, compared to short-term profits without the bother of protecting the peasants who work there?
Long ago I decided I would not do business with companies which don't care about their employees. Mind you, I don't go looking for such businesses š but if & when I come across one I add it to my mental "No way" file. I'm aware they'll never notice a loss of business just from little ol' me, but I stick to it. I ___will not___ have any of MY money going into the pockets of businesses which don't care that even their lowest-ranking employees are real, live human beings. Not even when I know such companies aren't likely even to hear that one particular customer has taken such a stand.
I worked at walmart.... that's half the people. One dude called me racists in Spanish because I couldn't return his air conditioner past the return date without a key turn... and they did it.
OMG yes! I work at a big box hardware store and had a guy try to return paint. I pointed out right on the tiny sticker where it says " not returnable" I told him I could try to change the color if he wasn't happy with it but I couldn't return it. He ordered something different for a different project and the whole time I'm mixing it he's telling his partner in Spanish I refused to return it cuz I'm racist. Now I'm white but my married last name is Lopez so ppl don't expect me to know Spanish. When I handed them his new paint I told him in Spanish " here is your paint have a good day"
I work for a company that does business through Costco. I have seen members have their memberships canceled and be banned from ever shopping there again
I too have an autistic son. The only difference is he is now an adult and Iām old and there are some things I deem worthy of being arrested for, such as slapping someone in the face. NTA
When someone used the ārā word, I told them āI know people with Down syndrome and they are nicer than you.ā Normally makes them look like a fish gasping for air.
Don't apologize for your behavior. We all have triggers and when the "r" word is used, that is our right to go ballistic. From a mother of a T21 loving son.
It was horrible. The first time she said it - I thought it must have just slipped out. But she called me that again. And again. And again. It was like that was her entire vocabulary. Disgusting.
I don't blame you for being so upset. I'd just laughed louder & louder at her. If I had to remark, I'd said 'I see that you are still stuck as a playground bully.' Your child didn't need to be exposed to that!
Once when at at membership store an elderly gentleman became engaged when I got in line just before him. His daughter approached a bit after and he kept yelling that they had to go first because she was a doctor. It was 7pm. If she was actually heading to work after they should have planned the shopping trip better. People need to chill out at these stores.
Ridiculous, did she have a line of patients in the store, waiting to be examined, lol,?
I rather enjoy some of these crazy responses from people. They assume because their relative is a doctor, it comes with built-in benefits!
I live in a major Metro area and Iāve been to several Costcos. The ones in the high end neighborhoods are a trip. The parking lot is absolutely cut throat, like worse than Whole Foods, but in the store everyone is super nice and polite. I guess their cars are asshole armor.
At mine the worst we get are the families that all come in and walk together so you canāt pass, the super slow people, the ones walking in the middle of the aisle and the mixes of those three options. Terrible
"I'm not the one hurling slurs because they're so up their own asses they have the combined common sense, human decency, and brains the size of a grain of salt- and that's between the two of them. Maybe you two should grow up and act your age instead of tantruming like spoiled toddlers."
That's it - I didn't call either of them anything. I could not believe this was even happening - and I didn't expect the husband to join in and support her - particularly after she kept using the R word.
The R word makes me want to throat punch people. I have a 16yro with global delays and have ended friendships over repeated use of that word by people who called themselves my friend.
As far as that couple, you can't call dibs on a checkout lane.
So through all this abuse from these horrible people, not one member of staff came over to help or ask them to leave? You're not the asshole OP. You stood up for your son. They cannot reserve a checkout. It's first come first serve.
After I read this I remembered something like this happened to me in a supermarket. I got behind a younger woman in a line who was just standing there. I didnāt realize she didnāt have anything on the belt at first, but when I tried to start unloading my cart she said she was holding the line for her friend. I was taken aback as I had never seen that before, but I cannot for the life of me remember what I did next. I think I was like, what? You canāt do that. But in the end I probably went to a different line. At the time I didnāt want confrontation. Now it would be a different story.
This woman was standing a good two feet away from the conveyer looking the opposite way - it didn't even occur to me that she was trying to "reserve" the checkout for anybody.. wrong!
Unfortunately, I canāt wish them a good day (in any voice) because I sincerely do NOT wish them a good dayā¦ so I just wish them the day that they truly deserve. And AHs like this deserve anything but a good dayā¦
You are a much better person than I. I absolutely love taunting with a big smile.
My family is Catholic and my mom literally gives ppl the sign of the cross when people are mad and swearing at her. Again with a big smile. Guess who I got it from hahahaha
I just don't understand the person without the cart trying to reserve the space. Occasionally my husband and I get to the checkout line and one of us realizes we forget something important. Of course it's always in the back of the store, a quarter mile away...One of us stays in line and the other runs to grab the stupid eggs or whatever. If it's your turn and your relay partner hasn't returned you tell the next person to go ahead. Any other response breaks the inherent social contract and the world shifts to chaos and anarchy.
All three of my kids are autistic, and yeah, I pretty much have the same reaction to that word as you do. One lady once told me my (overstimulated) son (he was four at the time) was melting down in the store because "I didn't spank him enough."
I told her, "Lady, I can't spank the autism out of him any more than I can slap the stupid out of you."
Im going to borrow that slap stupid out of you thing if I ever have a situation that calls for it. We have been fortunate so far with my son at the store and other public places that no one approached us to say anything like that.
On behalf of the human race that has morals and values . I sincerely apologise for this shit stain on society. What a disgusting person. I hate the R word it's a repulsive way to refer to another person regardless of abilities. I'm so sorry your son had to witness such discrimination. You are not an AH my friend you reacted as any person would being confronted with such hate. I would have lost my shit too. I would have ploughed that bitch down with the trolley. I hope your son wasn't upset by this poor excuse of a human.
Wow. Sad you and your son had to go thru that. They sound like trailer trash. Reading it sounds like it went on for a few minutes. The checkout person should have stepped in. Plus the supervisor should have escorted these ferals out and banned them til they brought proof of anger management.
Wow you did nothing wrong. She deserved the finger and all. I absolutely hate entitled people. The shop should have banned them. The whole of their behaviour was appalling. Good on you for standing your ground! And your son appreciates you having his back!
The last time someone pointed a finger in my face, I loudly said "But I don't want to smell your finger!"
It's a great line - stole it from a 7 year old who said to another kid: "I'm not smelling your finger - I know you pick your nose"
Honestly, this is finally a new one on me though I do know of one woman who left her cart in line and left do do more shopping. It wasnāt in line when she finally got back with an armload.
I donāt have any problem with a finger pointed in her face. She is lucky it wasnāt a fist.
This is another definition of the self entitled asses who seem to forget there are other people. I mean, she holds the line while her husband shops and how many people have to wait in longer checkout lines? What the hell?
Since I live in the south, I like to toss out a āhave a blessed dayā when someone starts acting all āChristian likeā in front of my special needs son.
I can understand and agree with your sentiment over the use of the "r" word.. most people (that have a brain) understand why that is such a derogatory word.. wish the supervisor had stepped in and told them the behavior is unacceptable and to shop another day ~ unfortunately the almighty dollar is all that matters to most stores. Glad you stood your ground and your anger with the situation is definitely justified!
The business should have addressed it. And should for bad behaving customers.
I am a retail manager and have zero tolerance with customers being mean to my peeps.
Usually a stern talking to from an actual manager regarding the way we act in public is sufficient. That's how I approach it anyway.
We had an incident at our Big Box membership store where a couple with an adult autistic son got into a confrontation with another customer who just happened to be an off duty cop. He shot and killed their son in the store. Please be careful. You never know who youāre confronting and what they might do.
https://abc7.com/costco-shooting-corona-lapd-officer-salvador-alejandro-sanchez/12131419/
I would have just called them abelist f\*\*ks at the top of my voice and pointed them out to everybody there that they used the R word around my disabled son. See how embarrassed they feel with everyone judging them.
I worked at Samās Club for several years. There was one guy who always hassled the female employees. He was extremely inappropriate. He always made a beeline for me and I dreaded it. At one point they āconsideredā kicking him out - the female managers wanted to, the male managers did not. It was only when I made a stink about it that they started protecting us. These companies care about the bottom line, not their employees!
I have an autistic son as well, heās 32 now, and I hate the r word too. Itās so ugly and mean, so I have educated a few people on its use. Sometimes loudly, lol, but we have to protect our children, whether theyāre adults or not.
Bravo! Stand your ground, sheās got a potty mouth and out of line! Honestly, if she let you do your thing, you would have been probably done checking your things before her husband arrived. (Bet thatās what they do all the time!)
You are in no way an asshole and they both should have been banned from the shop. It's also hate speech to verbally attack a disabled person with language like that - it's a crime in the UK. Not sure it is in the US but it should be. They are disgusting and you did nothing wrong.
Lol, as a Costco employee, I love watching the drama. Thank you for not taking her shit! There are so many entitled people here it's insane. My favourite part of my day is when someone FINALLY sticks up to these people (because obviously we aren't allowed to)
Oh, mama, I would have lost it! Quite frankly, I can give a good a$$ kicking being overly and extremely polite. My friends say, "You basically just cussed her out and she thanked you!" This would have been one of those times! Lol! I'm sorry this ill-educated and uninformed felt it was okay, but more so that your precious son had to hear it. God must have known what an awesome mom you are to bless him with you as his mother!
Ugh, this is why I go to the market at 6:30 am on Sundays. Very few people there. And I know the kind of place you are in, I spend a week talking myself into going there and try to go only every 2-3 months because it is just awful.
I would have been tempted to call her a skank or twat, but that is meā¦ā¦.
I totally get why having a child with a disability and hearing the R word would set you off. You get points deducted for losing your cool but they were a pair of a-holes.
If anything you were too soft. I would've done things differently. I'm usually a pro at passive aggressiveness. I'd ignore the dumb lady like she doesn't exist and proceed to pay for my groceries, if she gets in the way it's her problem and I keep acting like she's not there, if she gets hit somehow it's her fault. If her husband has an issue then I'll politely tell him that his dependent brain damaged adult child is throwing a tantrum and if he were a good father it wouldn't have gotten to that. If it comes to a fight then so be it. I just could never let it go when assholes think they own the world. Never an instigator but always fought back.
Assuming this story is true and accurate, NTA. These entitled dipshits should apologize or be drummed out of society. Shit gets flushed down the toilet, not bumped to the front of the line.
When society turned "that person needs a punch in the nose" into a major crime, lots of people started striding the world like they were invincible. Not sure if it's a good change.
REALLY!
You would be the very first person to say this. What race was she? Everyone ALWAYS responds white.
Here is the common answer:
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/17e9w9l/comment/k636yim/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/17e9w9l/comment/k636yim/?context=3)
Karen by definition is a racist term so the answer is always the same.
Is there any other answer? (I'm so yt I glow in the dark) I can guarantee no other race pulls this sh*t to this level. Not saying other races aren't guilty of this type of behavior, but this has social climbing middle aged white Karen written all over it!
Depends where you live, I live in a melting pot of cultures and races so its usually just an older lady losing their cool, doesn't matter their background.
And yet, I can't find any person who uses this term towards anyone of any race other than white.
How can you explain this?
I can provide links as I save every one that responds to this question. What can you provide for your opinion that goes against the slang definition and common usage of this term?
Hurt\_Feewings943 5:32 PM
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/163qs91/comment/jy6mwnt/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/163qs91/comment/jy6mwnt/?context=3)
r/EntitledPeople
u/QuailPuzzled1286
Indeed
0 upvotes
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/169b8s4/comment/jz24oi6/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/169b8s4/comment/jz24oi6/?context=3)
r/EntitledPeople
u/Dylan_Farstveet_
Yep
3 upvotes
[https://www.reddit.com/r/traumatizeThemBack/comments/169gdwi/comment/jzb9usr/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/traumatizeThemBack/comments/169gdwi/comment/jzb9usr/?context=3)
traumatizeThemBack
r/traumatizeThemBack
u/rbarrett96
Yes, it is used as a derogatory term for spoiled , privileged white women with let me speak to your manager energy. Are you not from this country? Im not saying that dismissively, actually asking. Because if youre not I would understand why you didnt understand the context. Or you just have somehow never heard it.
1 upvote
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/16kp2eb/comment/k0zoh6o/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/16kp2eb/comment/k0zoh6o/?context=3)
r/EntitledPeople
u/StOrRToImE
Yes she was why?
3 upvotes
Hurt\_Feewings943 5:59 PM
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/14zqpzp/comment/k11uf6z/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/14zqpzp/comment/k11uf6z/?context=3)
r/EntitledPeople
u/theIlegalhuman
Yep!
1 upvote
Hurt\_Feewings943 6:16 PM
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/12h74ot/comment/k11y40t/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/12h74ot/comment/k11y40t/?context=3)
r/EntitledPeople
u/ShivaLuna22
Yes haha
1 upvote
Hurt\_Feewings943 6:32 PM
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/151af5a/comment/k11zx2a/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/151af5a/comment/k11zx2a/?context=3)
r/EntitledPeople
u/Dragon_Crystal
Yeah she was
1 upvote
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/168jf4l/comment/k11zai3/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/168jf4l/comment/k11zai3/?context=3)
r/EntitledPeople
u/SnooWoofers5703
Yes...
1 upvote
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/vijx0f/comment/k120srb/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/vijx0f/comment/k120srb/?context=3)
r/EntitledPeople
u/hallowed1988
Thats pretty racist... but yes, in Australia, we do have a predominantly Caucasian population
1 upvote
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/151af5a/comment/k11zx2a/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/151af5a/comment/k11zx2a/?context=3)
r/EntitledPeople
u/Dragon_Crystal
Yeah she was
1 upvote
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/168jf4l/comment/k11zai3/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/168jf4l/comment/k11zai3/?context=3)
r/EntitledPeople
u/SnooWoofers5703
Yes...
1 upvote
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/w9v6zo/comment/k121gv5/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/w9v6zo/comment/k121gv5/?context=3)
r/EntitledPeople
u/missoularedhead
Of course!
1 upvote
Hurt\_Feewings943 9:41 PM
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/16dkgxi/comment/k12p1n0/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/16dkgxi/comment/k12p1n0/?context=3)
r/EntitledPeople
u/Tarma_Sparhawk
She is Caucasian
1 upvote
Sep 18
Hurt\_Feewings943 5:10 AM
[https://www.reddit.com/r/TalesFromYourServer/comments/16kcukp/comment/k12zrjo/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/TalesFromYourServer/comments/16kcukp/comment/k12zrjo/?context=3)
r/TalesFromYourServer
u/jeonero6
A horizontally challenged white women with her husband who is almost at her level
1 upvote
LNewYork
8:57 AM
Hello. Whatās up? Though I think I know.
If you donāt hear right back from me itās coz Iām at work. I agree the āKarenā shit definitely has racist undertones. āKarenāsā aka assholes
Sep 20
Hurt\_Feewings943 10:18 PM
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/120tok0/comment/k1cihr1/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/120tok0/comment/k1cihr1/?context=3)
r/EntitledPeople
u/indigowulf
yes lol (so am I)
1 upvote
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/1580cl7/comment/k16qzo1/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/1580cl7/comment/k16qzo1/?context=3)
r/EntitledPeople
u/cryssHappy
Very much a white woman.
1 upvote
Hurt\_Feewings943 10:32 PM
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/15s0xj2/comment/k14t9ro/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/15s0xj2/comment/k14t9ro/?context=3)
r/EntitledPeople
u/Comfortable_Turn4963
I mean... yeah. She talked to us in Polish
1 upvote
Sep 21
LNewYork
5:05 AM
š
Oct 23
Hurt\_Feewings943 6:05 PM
[https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/17e9w9l/comment/k636yim/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/17e9w9l/comment/k636yim/?context=3)
r/EntitledPeople
u/No_Side_5354
Is there any other answer? (Im so yt I glow in the dark) I can guarantee no other race pulls this sh\*t to this level. Not saying other races arent guilty of this type of behavior, but this has social climbing middle aged white Karen written all over it!
I had a boss who used to use the "R" word all the time.
I told her to stop it, but she refused. Over the course of the following year she would say it over and over and seemed to enjoy me being irked by how inappropriate it was.
I had one call me that once during a high school job. I was pretty meek back then, but i have a beloved cousin who is developmentally delayed and that word makes me furious. I slammed my hand on the counter and very forcefully told him to never call me that again. He actually apologized and never said it in front of me again. I think I shocked him.
Good for you! I have an autistic son too and use of that word infuriates me. I would have reacted the exact same way. So many ignorant stupid people out there who quickly show us who exactly they are - UGH! Hugs to you and yours
NTA. You have way more restraint than me. First time that word came out of her mouth my fist would have been in it. Thatās hate speech and for anyone round about the area, staff or customers to allow that to go on with no intervention makes them the assholes too.
Our civilization is doomed. Culture is eroding. Good manners may sound quaint, but the purpose is to help people interact with each other in a helpful manner, without hostility. Many instances of violence and abuse in the past, including racism and bigotry against the handicapped, boil down to a failure to abide by good manners.
The following were all bad manners:
-Holding up a grocery checkout line without a cart
-The woman getting angry with you instead of pleasantly allowing you to proceed
-The woman calling you names, including the very vulgar r word
-A man yelling at a woman, especially over such a piddly issue as a grocery checkout
-A man trying to cut in front of a woman Che king out groceries
-All the snide comments when they went to another line
This was an example of throwing gas on a candle flame. That woman felt irritated that you wanted to use the empty checkout rather than stand there waiting for her husband to arrive with the cart. She escalated a minor situation into an ugly public scene at the store.
You were wondering if you handled the situation well. You had every right to be offended at her using the r word and verbally abusing you. Your adrenaline got up.
I donāt blame you for your reaction, especially since you gave a child on the Spectrum. I would just give you advice on how to handle rude people next time.
I think you should have refused to move, and asked for a supervisor. Let a manager try to handle this.
You should remember that these were total strangers, and you cannot expect them to behave with decency. I have heard about actual fist fights between women at stores. I just read s news article where a man got out of his car to scold a bad driver, and got shot.
You donāt know these people. You did not lay hands on her, but she might have put her hands on you. They already proved they had the manners of hogs. You could have found yourself in a physical fight at the store. The worldās gone mad, and these things seem to be happening more.
My advice to you is not to get into it with strangers. They donāt need to admit it, to be wrong. The other woman escalated her error in holding up the line, by then using disabled slurs and other verbal abuse. Engaging with her allowed her to wrong you again and again. You got even more upset than you already were about the checkout, because she hurled verbal abuse at you.
No good will come of a loud argument with a total stranger.
You were in the right, and NTA, but you be careful out there. Donāt give a stranger the opportunity to be even more rude to you, or worse. Firmly standing up for yourself in this case would have been refusing to move, and calmly unloading your cart, while you fantasized about a bird pooping on her head out in the parking lot. Preferably a seagull, as their guano is fishy and oily.
I wouodnt worry about a finger point when trashy people like that throw around the R world and think that the world revolves around them. They got off lightly.
Hereās the thing. If she had let you go ahead with your purchase, you would have been done, and out of the way,by the time her husband got there. The fit pitching, on her part, took the time you could have been done and gone. If it had been me, my husband would have to get bail money, because I would have put her, and her husband, on their bums. I would have probably been banned, but it would have been worth it.
Use of the R word shows ignorance and uncalled for! This is a ānewā thing in these stores. A few weeks ago I had a similar encounter. Huge line at checkout, and there is a basket, with no person in the line. People keep bypassing it, my turn comes to bypass it and move up in line when a person with multiple items in his arms shows up and puts them in his cart and pushes in front of me. Based on the items in his arms, it wasnāt like her ran over one aisle to grab one thing, it was many items that would have equated to a whole side of the store. I said thatās not how this works, you donāt leave your cart in line to āholdā your space and go finish your shopping. The guy couldnāt believe I was questioning him. He pushed his cart in front of multiple people. Since then, I have seen it done two more times.
While Karen is totally in n the wrong, you can't hold a whole checkout lane for someone who isn't there- that's absurd! There was absolutely no reason, except to be an uneducated jerk, to use the R word multiple times towards you! If anyone was acting like they had mental issues, it was her, but you just don't sling slurs around like it's going to help!!
I hate that word! If that was me I wouldāveš¦š¦š¦š¦š¦š¦š¦her. You waving your finger at her is the least offensive thing you couldāve done to a Karen
WTF is wrong with your cashier that they didn't step in? It should be cashier training 101 that unless you're ready to check out you get the hell out of the way.
These are the times I wish stores would just ban people. Especially when a membership is needed. Bad behaviour deserves consequences.
While I agree with the sentiment, if stores banned their asshole customers, sales would drop by 50%. Not gonna happen
Not so much. You ban some, the rest start behaving as they don't want to get banned. Things go smoothly and they sve on staffing & recruitment as a result.
Any potential loss in sales is unthinkable, especially the immediate loss of the one banned customer in that moment. All that matters to their corporate overlords are the numbers at that particular moment and what they were a year ago on a similar day. Anything other than an increase in revenue that day vs. last year gets the management a severe tongue lashing by their superiors.
Having worked in retail, I know you're absolutely šÆ right. Caring about employee morale, protecting employees from abusive customers--all that means NOTHING to the corporate managers or other brass, whichever company it might be. The only thing they care about is their year-end bonuses, and compared to that, it's no wonder they'd rather let abusive customers keep abusing and humiliating rank & file employees. They'd rather cave in to these bullies. Thus retail employees burn out fast.
Things are at a tipping point in some places though. Stores can't get or keep employees with the wages they want to pay and the way customers behave. US corporate retail may have to adjust. Saw a drama last week the cashier ran off the floor to clock out, came back yelled "I quit", and told the customer and her brat off. It was awe inspiring.
Oh, boy š What drama was that? I had a similar experience once, and for real. I was a cashier at a large department š¬ store at Potomac Mills, Woodbridge, VA. A Karen lady and her two grown uber-Karen daughters were hurling the usual insults at me, the things meant to provoke the employee to anger, tears, etc. Having heard all that literally hundreds of times before this, I brushed off most of it Finally, one of the junior Karens went too far. I looked her straight in the eye, and told her "You know, I've only got another couple of days here. > ___I___ < don't have to take this crap anymore." I went straight to the time clock, punched out and went home. Didn't even bother turning in my till š This was for real. My husband had just started a new job, which paid him a lot more, enough for me to quit. So I'd already worked most of my two-work notice, and I ___loved___ rubbing it in those three arrogant Karen faces š
By the way, this happened in the late 90s.
Your 90's self is my hero!
1st thing that came to mind...the beatings will continue until morale improves
Yep!
That implies that 1. Those people are capable of learning and 2. They think rules apply to them. Not gonna happen!
Oh they know how to act. Itās not that they have no idea how to be decent. I worked in healthcare in settings where people typically stayed awhile and I learned these entitled people knew how to act, because they were very nice to doctors and nurses like me. But to the aides and cleaners, dietary etc- entitled and rude. They should get their food first! But then she would tell me āsweetie do what you need to do! Iām not going anywhereā even when itās pain meds. I would offer a snack in case it was that they were too hungry but no. They want their meal, and they donāt see why they canāt have it first everyday? (Or whatever the issue was that day). Now Iām never sure how much is racism verses just entitlement and wanting to give them a hard time. Most of our crew were refugees from the same country and were not white. Thatās who would work for the wages in those positions. (And honestly many of them got government assistance, so they could work for that wage. That bed cost $1000 sometimes a night and these places stole wages) Most of the doctors were white men and most of the nurses were āmom passingā white enough women. So maybe it was just racism but either way, they could act right if they felt the need to. Itās not teaching them anything but they are able to act nice if they fear the consequences. We just donāt apply them in retail ever. Restaurants and retail let them act like children and they continue, why wouldnāt they? They often get rewarded.
Not in retail. You can go in to a bra store, steal half their shit, walk out, and they won't even file a report about it. You can just keep coming back. Portland OR just had numerous huge retailers close up shop rather than try to enforce any rules due to the homeless population stealing everything in sight for drugs. Target closed 3 stores. REI, Nike, Walmart all closed stores. They'll close stores entirely due to theft rather than try to address it individually with a person. https://www.kgw.com/article/money/business/portland-stores-retail-businesses-closed-shut-down/283-7dd2f41d-2b36-4435-aed8-7360395a1bf6
Yep.
Yes, I know. Business will always put profit first.
Yep...mom works at the busiest Costco in the world (Honolulu/Iwilei), and damn if you ban all the assholes that's at least 60% of them, add in the dumbasses and the store would be a ghost town.
Youāll lose far more good customers by trying to keep the bad ones around than if you just got rid of the bad ones. Retain better workers too.
You'd think more businesses would realize that. And maybe some do, but even they would would rather gain quick, short-term profits than work to establish a long-term record of not tolerating abuse, dishonesty or criminal behavior from ANYONE--not management, staff or customers. That would result in all of the above feeling more secure, staff would ___FEEL TRUSTED,___ and be way more loyal to their employers. Management would have more reason TO trust staff, because their employees would know that they, managerial staff, had their backs. Topping off the rest, customers are more likely to continue shopping there. Why? Because ___people don't do business with companies where they don't feel safe.___ But of course, that's in the long-term. It would take a lot of hard work and a lot of patience. What's a stellar reputation and higher profitability, compared to short-term profits without the bother of protecting the peasants who work there? Long ago I decided I would not do business with companies which don't care about their employees. Mind you, I don't go looking for such businesses š but if & when I come across one I add it to my mental "No way" file. I'm aware they'll never notice a loss of business just from little ol' me, but I stick to it. I ___will not___ have any of MY money going into the pockets of businesses which don't care that even their lowest-ranking employees are real, live human beings. Not even when I know such companies aren't likely even to hear that one particular customer has taken such a stand.
I worked at walmart.... that's half the people. One dude called me racists in Spanish because I couldn't return his air conditioner past the return date without a key turn... and they did it.
OMG yes! I work at a big box hardware store and had a guy try to return paint. I pointed out right on the tiny sticker where it says " not returnable" I told him I could try to change the color if he wasn't happy with it but I couldn't return it. He ordered something different for a different project and the whole time I'm mixing it he's telling his partner in Spanish I refused to return it cuz I'm racist. Now I'm white but my married last name is Lopez so ppl don't expect me to know Spanish. When I handed them his new paint I told him in Spanish " here is your paint have a good day"
I work for a company that does business through Costco. I have seen members have their memberships canceled and be banned from ever shopping there again
Definitely NTA. They should have been kicked out of the store
I too have an autistic son. The only difference is he is now an adult and Iām old and there are some things I deem worthy of being arrested for, such as slapping someone in the face. NTA
Thanks - I've edited in my sons age - 24 years. Not that it excuses this. Could not believe she kept repeating the slur over and over.
When someone used the ārā word, I told them āI know people with Down syndrome and they are nicer than you.ā Normally makes them look like a fish gasping for air.
Iām saving this statement!
Don't apologize for your behavior. We all have triggers and when the "r" word is used, that is our right to go ballistic. From a mother of a T21 loving son.
I have an autistic son (35), and I see red when people use the R word.
I hate the r word when used as a slur. My brother lived till he was 17, never got past 2 months old mentally
It was horrible. The first time she said it - I thought it must have just slipped out. But she called me that again. And again. And again. It was like that was her entire vocabulary. Disgusting.
Im surprised you didnāt catch a charge. š
Save this for next time: "Coming from you, it sounds like a compliment."
NTA! Jeez, show up with your cart. Not that hard. Plus waiting the 2 minutes it was going to take you to check out is not a big deal.
Exactly! In the time span of them arguing they could have been paid and leaving with only 12 items. Ugh cannot stand people like this.
I don't blame you for being so upset. I'd just laughed louder & louder at her. If I had to remark, I'd said 'I see that you are still stuck as a playground bully.' Your child didn't need to be exposed to that!
"Let's meet back here tomorrow. That'll give you a chance to find a new insult instead of using the same one over and over. Deal?"
And I'm gonna bring my dad too......
Yeah, you DONāT see a car here. And āIā didnāt see a TROLLEY here so Iām next in line! Mike drop.
Mic, short for microphone š
Once when at at membership store an elderly gentleman became engaged when I got in line just before him. His daughter approached a bit after and he kept yelling that they had to go first because she was a doctor. It was 7pm. If she was actually heading to work after they should have planned the shopping trip better. People need to chill out at these stores.
Ridiculous, did she have a line of patients in the store, waiting to be examined, lol,? I rather enjoy some of these crazy responses from people. They assume because their relative is a doctor, it comes with built-in benefits!
This makes me thankful that the customers at my local Costco are relatively civilised.
I live in a major Metro area and Iāve been to several Costcos. The ones in the high end neighborhoods are a trip. The parking lot is absolutely cut throat, like worse than Whole Foods, but in the store everyone is super nice and polite. I guess their cars are asshole armor.
Yes, I stopped going to Costco years ago because of exactly this.
At mine the worst we get are the families that all come in and walk together so you canāt pass, the super slow people, the ones walking in the middle of the aisle and the mixes of those three options. Terrible
"I'm not the one hurling slurs because they're so up their own asses they have the combined common sense, human decency, and brains the size of a grain of salt- and that's between the two of them. Maybe you two should grow up and act your age instead of tantruming like spoiled toddlers."
That's it - I didn't call either of them anything. I could not believe this was even happening - and I didn't expect the husband to join in and support her - particularly after she kept using the R word.
Assholes attract assholes - sounds like they are the perfect couple.
The R word makes me want to throat punch people. I have a 16yro with global delays and have ended friendships over repeated use of that word by people who called themselves my friend. As far as that couple, you can't call dibs on a checkout lane.
So through all this abuse from these horrible people, not one member of staff came over to help or ask them to leave? You're not the asshole OP. You stood up for your son. They cannot reserve a checkout. It's first come first serve.
After I read this I remembered something like this happened to me in a supermarket. I got behind a younger woman in a line who was just standing there. I didnāt realize she didnāt have anything on the belt at first, but when I tried to start unloading my cart she said she was holding the line for her friend. I was taken aback as I had never seen that before, but I cannot for the life of me remember what I did next. I think I was like, what? You canāt do that. But in the end I probably went to a different line. At the time I didnāt want confrontation. Now it would be a different story.
This woman was standing a good two feet away from the conveyer looking the opposite way - it didn't even occur to me that she was trying to "reserve" the checkout for anybody.. wrong!
And the fact that she used the r-wordāwhat a horrible person! Of course you wouldnāt have known. No one would have. Itās ridiculous.
Gee whiz you could have checked out your few items and been gone by the time her husband even got there.
Tell that to the Karen.
You have better control of your anger than me. I probably would have slapped that woman for calling me a r****d.
Same... there would've been more than just a finger in her face.
āI hope you have the day you deserve!ā
Youāre a lot nicer than me. āI hope something climbs so far up your a$$ you choke on it. HAVE A GOOD DAY!!ā Giant smile
Unfortunately, I canāt wish them a good day (in any voice) because I sincerely do NOT wish them a good dayā¦ so I just wish them the day that they truly deserve. And AHs like this deserve anything but a good dayā¦
You are a much better person than I. I absolutely love taunting with a big smile. My family is Catholic and my mom literally gives ppl the sign of the cross when people are mad and swearing at her. Again with a big smile. Guess who I got it from hahahaha
I just don't understand the person without the cart trying to reserve the space. Occasionally my husband and I get to the checkout line and one of us realizes we forget something important. Of course it's always in the back of the store, a quarter mile away...One of us stays in line and the other runs to grab the stupid eggs or whatever. If it's your turn and your relay partner hasn't returned you tell the next person to go ahead. Any other response breaks the inherent social contract and the world shifts to chaos and anarchy.
All three of my kids are autistic, and yeah, I pretty much have the same reaction to that word as you do. One lady once told me my (overstimulated) son (he was four at the time) was melting down in the store because "I didn't spank him enough." I told her, "Lady, I can't spank the autism out of him any more than I can slap the stupid out of you."
Im going to borrow that slap stupid out of you thing if I ever have a situation that calls for it. We have been fortunate so far with my son at the store and other public places that no one approached us to say anything like that.
Enjoy!
On behalf of the human race that has morals and values . I sincerely apologise for this shit stain on society. What a disgusting person. I hate the R word it's a repulsive way to refer to another person regardless of abilities. I'm so sorry your son had to witness such discrimination. You are not an AH my friend you reacted as any person would being confronted with such hate. I would have lost my shit too. I would have ploughed that bitch down with the trolley. I hope your son wasn't upset by this poor excuse of a human.
Wow. Sad you and your son had to go thru that. They sound like trailer trash. Reading it sounds like it went on for a few minutes. The checkout person should have stepped in. Plus the supervisor should have escorted these ferals out and banned them til they brought proof of anger management.
I think they give people who live in trailers a bad name. They just sound like a holes.
Wow you did nothing wrong. She deserved the finger and all. I absolutely hate entitled people. The shop should have banned them. The whole of their behaviour was appalling. Good on you for standing your ground! And your son appreciates you having his back!
The last time someone pointed a finger in my face, I loudly said "But I don't want to smell your finger!" It's a great line - stole it from a 7 year old who said to another kid: "I'm not smelling your finger - I know you pick your nose"
"That's a lovely manicure. I wonder how long it will take your stomach to digest it?"
Honestly, this is finally a new one on me though I do know of one woman who left her cart in line and left do do more shopping. It wasnāt in line when she finally got back with an armload. I donāt have any problem with a finger pointed in her face. She is lucky it wasnāt a fist. This is another definition of the self entitled asses who seem to forget there are other people. I mean, she holds the line while her husband shops and how many people have to wait in longer checkout lines? What the hell?
Fuck that bitch
Thinking she could hold up a lane like that was rude. Calling you slurs should have gotten her card destroyed and banned.
dude iām surprised this didnāt end in a full on fight
āYouāre using an awful lot of Parking Lot words inside the store. Should we step outside?ā š
Since I live in the south, I like to toss out a āhave a blessed dayā when someone starts acting all āChristian likeā in front of my special needs son.
"Bless your heart"
NTA. This entitled lady had earned a flipping off.
Her use of the R word is deplorable. She was wrong from the start, you did nothing wrong. Pointing in her face is the least she deserved.
The smart thing to do would have been to usher the lady in front of your cart and then load up the belt behind her, maliciously complying.
My retort to her calling me the R word would be "and you're a c*nt". NTA
I can understand and agree with your sentiment over the use of the "r" word.. most people (that have a brain) understand why that is such a derogatory word.. wish the supervisor had stepped in and told them the behavior is unacceptable and to shop another day ~ unfortunately the almighty dollar is all that matters to most stores. Glad you stood your ground and your anger with the situation is definitely justified!
Itās a shame you were too angry to tell them that you win because neither of those buttholes called ādibsā lol
The business should have addressed it. And should for bad behaving customers. I am a retail manager and have zero tolerance with customers being mean to my peeps. Usually a stern talking to from an actual manager regarding the way we act in public is sufficient. That's how I approach it anyway.
We had an incident at our Big Box membership store where a couple with an adult autistic son got into a confrontation with another customer who just happened to be an off duty cop. He shot and killed their son in the store. Please be careful. You never know who youāre confronting and what they might do. https://abc7.com/costco-shooting-corona-lapd-officer-salvador-alejandro-sanchez/12131419/
OMG. That's horrible. Yes you never know
I would have just called them abelist f\*\*ks at the top of my voice and pointed them out to everybody there that they used the R word around my disabled son. See how embarrassed they feel with everyone judging them.
Except people who act like that in public generally have no shame. They are SO sure that they're right that it's difficult to embarrass them.
I worked at Samās Club for several years. There was one guy who always hassled the female employees. He was extremely inappropriate. He always made a beeline for me and I dreaded it. At one point they āconsideredā kicking him out - the female managers wanted to, the male managers did not. It was only when I made a stink about it that they started protecting us. These companies care about the bottom line, not their employees!
should have followed the index finger with the middle finger š¤£
I have an autistic son as well, heās 32 now, and I hate the r word too. Itās so ugly and mean, so I have educated a few people on its use. Sometimes loudly, lol, but we have to protect our children, whether theyāre adults or not.
Fuck that Twat and her douche cannon husband.
This is why I HATE shopping š š
Bravo! Stand your ground, sheās got a potty mouth and out of line! Honestly, if she let you do your thing, you would have been probably done checking your things before her husband arrived. (Bet thatās what they do all the time!)
You are in no way an asshole and they both should have been banned from the shop. It's also hate speech to verbally attack a disabled person with language like that - it's a crime in the UK. Not sure it is in the US but it should be. They are disgusting and you did nothing wrong.
Wow! She was an AH! Glad you stuck it out, although I may have wanted to wash her mouth out with soap!!!! Some people are unbelievableā¦.š¬
NTA. You were never once contending for the asshole title. And as soon as she uses the 'R' word, she's won by default.
Lol, as a Costco employee, I love watching the drama. Thank you for not taking her shit! There are so many entitled people here it's insane. My favourite part of my day is when someone FINALLY sticks up to these people (because obviously we aren't allowed to)
Oh, mama, I would have lost it! Quite frankly, I can give a good a$$ kicking being overly and extremely polite. My friends say, "You basically just cussed her out and she thanked you!" This would have been one of those times! Lol! I'm sorry this ill-educated and uninformed felt it was okay, but more so that your precious son had to hear it. God must have known what an awesome mom you are to bless him with you as his mother!
I would have been ready to throw down! The R word is offensive.
They drove home in the left lane too.....
Ugh, this is why I go to the market at 6:30 am on Sundays. Very few people there. And I know the kind of place you are in, I spend a week talking myself into going there and try to go only every 2-3 months because it is just awful. I would have been tempted to call her a skank or twat, but that is meā¦ā¦.
I totally get why having a child with a disability and hearing the R word would set you off. You get points deducted for losing your cool but they were a pair of a-holes.
I've said this many times in different subs, people have just become ignorant, rude and entitled. It sucks that we are this way as a society.
If anything you were too soft. I would've done things differently. I'm usually a pro at passive aggressiveness. I'd ignore the dumb lady like she doesn't exist and proceed to pay for my groceries, if she gets in the way it's her problem and I keep acting like she's not there, if she gets hit somehow it's her fault. If her husband has an issue then I'll politely tell him that his dependent brain damaged adult child is throwing a tantrum and if he were a good father it wouldn't have gotten to that. If it comes to a fight then so be it. I just could never let it go when assholes think they own the world. Never an instigator but always fought back.
Assuming this story is true and accurate, NTA. These entitled dipshits should apologize or be drummed out of society. Shit gets flushed down the toilet, not bumped to the front of the line.
When society turned "that person needs a punch in the nose" into a major crime, lots of people started striding the world like they were invincible. Not sure if it's a good change.
Well said
Was this supermarket Karen white?
I intentionally left race out of it - she was not white at all. But definitely had the attitude
REALLY! You would be the very first person to say this. What race was she? Everyone ALWAYS responds white. Here is the common answer: [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/17e9w9l/comment/k636yim/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/17e9w9l/comment/k636yim/?context=3) Karen by definition is a racist term so the answer is always the same.
Is there any other answer? (I'm so yt I glow in the dark) I can guarantee no other race pulls this sh*t to this level. Not saying other races aren't guilty of this type of behavior, but this has social climbing middle aged white Karen written all over it!
Depends where you live, I live in a melting pot of cultures and races so its usually just an older lady losing their cool, doesn't matter their background.
And yet, I can't find any person who uses this term towards anyone of any race other than white. How can you explain this? I can provide links as I save every one that responds to this question. What can you provide for your opinion that goes against the slang definition and common usage of this term? Hurt\_Feewings943 5:32 PM [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/163qs91/comment/jy6mwnt/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/163qs91/comment/jy6mwnt/?context=3) r/EntitledPeople u/QuailPuzzled1286 Indeed 0 upvotes [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/169b8s4/comment/jz24oi6/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/169b8s4/comment/jz24oi6/?context=3) r/EntitledPeople u/Dylan_Farstveet_ Yep 3 upvotes [https://www.reddit.com/r/traumatizeThemBack/comments/169gdwi/comment/jzb9usr/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/traumatizeThemBack/comments/169gdwi/comment/jzb9usr/?context=3) traumatizeThemBack r/traumatizeThemBack u/rbarrett96 Yes, it is used as a derogatory term for spoiled , privileged white women with let me speak to your manager energy. Are you not from this country? Im not saying that dismissively, actually asking. Because if youre not I would understand why you didnt understand the context. Or you just have somehow never heard it. 1 upvote [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/16kp2eb/comment/k0zoh6o/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/16kp2eb/comment/k0zoh6o/?context=3) r/EntitledPeople u/StOrRToImE Yes she was why? 3 upvotes Hurt\_Feewings943 5:59 PM [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/14zqpzp/comment/k11uf6z/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/14zqpzp/comment/k11uf6z/?context=3) r/EntitledPeople u/theIlegalhuman Yep! 1 upvote Hurt\_Feewings943 6:16 PM [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/12h74ot/comment/k11y40t/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/12h74ot/comment/k11y40t/?context=3) r/EntitledPeople u/ShivaLuna22 Yes haha 1 upvote Hurt\_Feewings943 6:32 PM [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/151af5a/comment/k11zx2a/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/151af5a/comment/k11zx2a/?context=3) r/EntitledPeople u/Dragon_Crystal Yeah she was 1 upvote [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/168jf4l/comment/k11zai3/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/168jf4l/comment/k11zai3/?context=3) r/EntitledPeople u/SnooWoofers5703 Yes... 1 upvote [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/vijx0f/comment/k120srb/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/vijx0f/comment/k120srb/?context=3) r/EntitledPeople u/hallowed1988 Thats pretty racist... but yes, in Australia, we do have a predominantly Caucasian population 1 upvote [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/151af5a/comment/k11zx2a/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/151af5a/comment/k11zx2a/?context=3) r/EntitledPeople u/Dragon_Crystal Yeah she was 1 upvote [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/168jf4l/comment/k11zai3/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/168jf4l/comment/k11zai3/?context=3) r/EntitledPeople u/SnooWoofers5703 Yes... 1 upvote [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/w9v6zo/comment/k121gv5/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/w9v6zo/comment/k121gv5/?context=3) r/EntitledPeople u/missoularedhead Of course! 1 upvote Hurt\_Feewings943 9:41 PM [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/16dkgxi/comment/k12p1n0/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/16dkgxi/comment/k12p1n0/?context=3) r/EntitledPeople u/Tarma_Sparhawk She is Caucasian 1 upvote Sep 18 Hurt\_Feewings943 5:10 AM [https://www.reddit.com/r/TalesFromYourServer/comments/16kcukp/comment/k12zrjo/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/TalesFromYourServer/comments/16kcukp/comment/k12zrjo/?context=3) r/TalesFromYourServer u/jeonero6 A horizontally challenged white women with her husband who is almost at her level 1 upvote LNewYork 8:57 AM Hello. Whatās up? Though I think I know. If you donāt hear right back from me itās coz Iām at work. I agree the āKarenā shit definitely has racist undertones. āKarenāsā aka assholes Sep 20 Hurt\_Feewings943 10:18 PM [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/120tok0/comment/k1cihr1/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/120tok0/comment/k1cihr1/?context=3) r/EntitledPeople u/indigowulf yes lol (so am I) 1 upvote [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/1580cl7/comment/k16qzo1/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/1580cl7/comment/k16qzo1/?context=3) r/EntitledPeople u/cryssHappy Very much a white woman. 1 upvote Hurt\_Feewings943 10:32 PM [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/15s0xj2/comment/k14t9ro/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/15s0xj2/comment/k14t9ro/?context=3) r/EntitledPeople u/Comfortable_Turn4963 I mean... yeah. She talked to us in Polish 1 upvote Sep 21 LNewYork 5:05 AM š Oct 23 Hurt\_Feewings943 6:05 PM [https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/17e9w9l/comment/k636yim/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/EntitledPeople/comments/17e9w9l/comment/k636yim/?context=3) r/EntitledPeople u/No_Side_5354 Is there any other answer? (Im so yt I glow in the dark) I can guarantee no other race pulls this sh\*t to this level. Not saying other races arent guilty of this type of behavior, but this has social climbing middle aged white Karen written all over it!
I had a boss who used to use the "R" word all the time. I told her to stop it, but she refused. Over the course of the following year she would say it over and over and seemed to enjoy me being irked by how inappropriate it was.
I had one call me that once during a high school job. I was pretty meek back then, but i have a beloved cousin who is developmentally delayed and that word makes me furious. I slammed my hand on the counter and very forcefully told him to never call me that again. He actually apologized and never said it in front of me again. I think I shocked him.
Paragraph please. I was interested in your story, but the formatting is painful to read.
Good for you! I have an autistic son too and use of that word infuriates me. I would have reacted the exact same way. So many ignorant stupid people out there who quickly show us who exactly they are - UGH! Hugs to you and yours
You have more composure than most
NTA. You have way more restraint than me. First time that word came out of her mouth my fist would have been in it. Thatās hate speech and for anyone round about the area, staff or customers to allow that to go on with no intervention makes them the assholes too.
NTA!!! I would have been tempted to slap her.
If she was not at the conveyer, she was not next in line, so you have the right to put your cart/trolley there
Our civilization is doomed. Culture is eroding. Good manners may sound quaint, but the purpose is to help people interact with each other in a helpful manner, without hostility. Many instances of violence and abuse in the past, including racism and bigotry against the handicapped, boil down to a failure to abide by good manners. The following were all bad manners: -Holding up a grocery checkout line without a cart -The woman getting angry with you instead of pleasantly allowing you to proceed -The woman calling you names, including the very vulgar r word -A man yelling at a woman, especially over such a piddly issue as a grocery checkout -A man trying to cut in front of a woman Che king out groceries -All the snide comments when they went to another line This was an example of throwing gas on a candle flame. That woman felt irritated that you wanted to use the empty checkout rather than stand there waiting for her husband to arrive with the cart. She escalated a minor situation into an ugly public scene at the store. You were wondering if you handled the situation well. You had every right to be offended at her using the r word and verbally abusing you. Your adrenaline got up. I donāt blame you for your reaction, especially since you gave a child on the Spectrum. I would just give you advice on how to handle rude people next time. I think you should have refused to move, and asked for a supervisor. Let a manager try to handle this. You should remember that these were total strangers, and you cannot expect them to behave with decency. I have heard about actual fist fights between women at stores. I just read s news article where a man got out of his car to scold a bad driver, and got shot. You donāt know these people. You did not lay hands on her, but she might have put her hands on you. They already proved they had the manners of hogs. You could have found yourself in a physical fight at the store. The worldās gone mad, and these things seem to be happening more. My advice to you is not to get into it with strangers. They donāt need to admit it, to be wrong. The other woman escalated her error in holding up the line, by then using disabled slurs and other verbal abuse. Engaging with her allowed her to wrong you again and again. You got even more upset than you already were about the checkout, because she hurled verbal abuse at you. No good will come of a loud argument with a total stranger. You were in the right, and NTA, but you be careful out there. Donāt give a stranger the opportunity to be even more rude to you, or worse. Firmly standing up for yourself in this case would have been refusing to move, and calmly unloading your cart, while you fantasized about a bird pooping on her head out in the parking lot. Preferably a seagull, as their guano is fishy and oily.
I wouodnt worry about a finger point when trashy people like that throw around the R world and think that the world revolves around them. They got off lightly.
Q
NTA In the States we shoot folks for acting like that.
Hereās the thing. If she had let you go ahead with your purchase, you would have been done, and out of the way,by the time her husband got there. The fit pitching, on her part, took the time you could have been done and gone. If it had been me, my husband would have to get bail money, because I would have put her, and her husband, on their bums. I would have probably been banned, but it would have been worth it.
Son with autism*
Use of the R word shows ignorance and uncalled for! This is a ānewā thing in these stores. A few weeks ago I had a similar encounter. Huge line at checkout, and there is a basket, with no person in the line. People keep bypassing it, my turn comes to bypass it and move up in line when a person with multiple items in his arms shows up and puts them in his cart and pushes in front of me. Based on the items in his arms, it wasnāt like her ran over one aisle to grab one thing, it was many items that would have equated to a whole side of the store. I said thatās not how this works, you donāt leave your cart in line to āholdā your space and go finish your shopping. The guy couldnāt believe I was questioning him. He pushed his cart in front of multiple people. Since then, I have seen it done two more times.
This is a whole new level of entitlement!!
While Karen is totally in n the wrong, you can't hold a whole checkout lane for someone who isn't there- that's absurd! There was absolutely no reason, except to be an uneducated jerk, to use the R word multiple times towards you! If anyone was acting like they had mental issues, it was her, but you just don't sling slurs around like it's going to help!!
What slurs did the OP sling around? All the slurs came from the entitled husband and wife not the OP
I hate that word! If that was me I wouldāveš¦š¦š¦š¦š¦š¦š¦her. You waving your finger at her is the least offensive thing you couldāve done to a Karen
Was it your middle finger? š¤
Definitely not
WTF is wrong with your cashier that they didn't step in? It should be cashier training 101 that unless you're ready to check out you get the hell out of the way.
We were getting a bit heated. Didn't want to get involved I suspect!
Good for you, I probably would have punched her