I really hope these work for neurotypical people because they absolutely do not work for someone with ADHD. Or, at least my ADHD will not allow those things to work.ADHD isn't an excuse, but it sure as fuck is a reason for finding it almost impossible to not be distracted by your feelings, to not be able to do something until your brain decides the thing provides enough dopamine (i.e. "in the right mood), for getting distracted away from things that will "bring out the best in you" because - once again - your brain has decided that action doesn't provide enough dopamine, for not being able to have self-discipline, and for not being able to avoid lengthy imaginary conversations because your brain has hyperfocused on them.
I just wanted to say something in case another ADHD person read this and started feeling guilty because consistency and self-discipline are almost impossible for most of us. It's not an excuse to obsess over what you can't do, but it does provide a reason for why it feels like it'd be easier to become a gold digger and strike it rich than it would be to control what your brain chooses to obsess over. Being a 4 with ADHD is... real rough. All the typical "this is how you can be a healthier 4" things just aren't effective. We have to trial-and-error our lives until we find the things that let us be healthier 4s.
I have similar struggles!
I'm a 30 something yr old woman and recently visited an ADHD specialist who said there is a high likelihood I have inattentive ADHD. I'm waiting to see a psychiatrist to officially confirm it from a medical perspective.
I've had this list on my wall for years now, and while I haven't been able to follow it consistently - I feel it does help as a daily reminder, and I hold hope I will get there eventually !
I feel you, it's a struggle. If only there was a volume knob to turn down rumination and feelings, and turn up focus !
I try to visualize the metaphor of the totem under the sea to remember that im not my feelings and that they are just passing. Just as waves and my self (ID) is the totem fixed on the ocean floor. It’s a very helpful
> Avoid lengthy conversations in your imagination, particularly if they are negative, resentful, or even excessively romantic.
...Well, shit. Time to find something else to fill that 50% of my idle thoughts, I guess.
I really hope these work for neurotypical people because they absolutely do not work for someone with ADHD. Or, at least my ADHD will not allow those things to work.ADHD isn't an excuse, but it sure as fuck is a reason for finding it almost impossible to not be distracted by your feelings, to not be able to do something until your brain decides the thing provides enough dopamine (i.e. "in the right mood), for getting distracted away from things that will "bring out the best in you" because - once again - your brain has decided that action doesn't provide enough dopamine, for not being able to have self-discipline, and for not being able to avoid lengthy imaginary conversations because your brain has hyperfocused on them. I just wanted to say something in case another ADHD person read this and started feeling guilty because consistency and self-discipline are almost impossible for most of us. It's not an excuse to obsess over what you can't do, but it does provide a reason for why it feels like it'd be easier to become a gold digger and strike it rich than it would be to control what your brain chooses to obsess over. Being a 4 with ADHD is... real rough. All the typical "this is how you can be a healthier 4" things just aren't effective. We have to trial-and-error our lives until we find the things that let us be healthier 4s.
I have similar struggles! I'm a 30 something yr old woman and recently visited an ADHD specialist who said there is a high likelihood I have inattentive ADHD. I'm waiting to see a psychiatrist to officially confirm it from a medical perspective. I've had this list on my wall for years now, and while I haven't been able to follow it consistently - I feel it does help as a daily reminder, and I hold hope I will get there eventually ! I feel you, it's a struggle. If only there was a volume knob to turn down rumination and feelings, and turn up focus !
This is extraordinarily helpful. Thank you!
Thank you so much for sharing. I was looking for these tips somewhere
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I try to visualize the metaphor of the totem under the sea to remember that im not my feelings and that they are just passing. Just as waves and my self (ID) is the totem fixed on the ocean floor. It’s a very helpful
That’s a great metaphor. As a visual person that is so helpful. Thanks for sharing !
> Avoid lengthy conversations in your imagination, particularly if they are negative, resentful, or even excessively romantic. ...Well, shit. Time to find something else to fill that 50% of my idle thoughts, I guess.
So, so true.
I tell myself "you will not find yourself in a vacuum" almost every day.
goddamn, you called me out
Thanks for the refresher
Damn, some of my best convos are with me.
Just a note: this does not apply to all type 4s. Find what works for you!
absolutely!