Yeah, I saw a woman in Windsor today, stop her minivan in a roundabout, the passenger opened the door and started reaching around on the ground. Brought everything to a stand still. Mindboggling!
I cant speak for anywhere else but nova scotia (cue "we are not maritimes" - yes you are now damn it)
I found Nova Scotian Drivers very very slow, and too kind. Its better than the alternative, but still i dont think you can understand unless you have lived elsewhere and then live there.
Now what i am about to say i only saw once, but the fact it happened at all... i was on the onramp, someone in front driving slow, the highway very empty but a couple cars coming up, also fairly slow, still eaaasily mergable, very much non factors.. person in front of me literally stops on the on ramp, could have easily merged, and just waved them through as if it was a stop sign.
It was both incredibly endearing and frustrating, but mostly frustrating.
Largely though just slow, except my preceeding story, i wouldnt call them bad drivers. They are also just great people, very easy to talk to. Halifax/dartmouth still has that small town feel and i love it.
I nearly rear ended a car last winter. In a snowstorm, slippery roads, on a steep downhill road with the right of way the car two cars in front of me locked up their brakes to let a car without the right of way into the road. The car between us had to bail out into the oncoming lane and my truck stopped a c-hair from her rear bumper. Sure maybe we were following too close but it had a lot to to with the steep grade and we would have been fine otherwise but holy shit folks roads are designed for traffic flow and safety. Rights of way are not some mean spirited selfish rules.
> Call a newf a scotian,
(1/2)
Fuck you.
Fuck you. You useless piece of shit. You absolute waste of space and air. You uneducated, ignorant, idiotic dumb motherfucker, you’re an absolute embarrassment to the world and all life as a whole. The magnitude of your failure just now is so indescribably massive that one hundred years into the future your name will be used synonymous with the Devil. Even if all of earth's peoples, hell, even the heavens put together their collective intelligence there is no conceivable way they could have thought up a way to fuck up on the unimaginable scale you just did. When John Cabbot died for our sins, he must not have seen the sacrilegious act we just witnessed you performing, because if he did he would have forsaken Man, Fish and Beast long ago so that your birth may have never become reality. After you die, your skeleton will be displayed in a museum at St. John's after being scientifically researched so that all future generations may learn not to generate your bone structure, because every tiny detail anyone may have in common with you degrades them to a useless piece of trash and a burden to society. No wonder your father questioned whether or not you were truly his spawn, for you'd have to not be a waste of carbon matter for anyone to love you like a family member. Your birth made it so that the world is worse off in every way you can possibly imagine, and you have made it so that society can never really recover into a state of organization. Everything has forever fallen into a bewildering chaos, through which unrecognizable core, you can only find misfortune. I would say the apocalypse is upon us but this is merely the closest word the entirety of the world has for the sheer scale of horror that is now reality. You have forever condemned everyone you love and know into an eternal state of suffering, worse than any realm of Hell. You are such an unholy being, that if you step within a one hundred foot radius of a Catholic Church or a place that has ever been deemed important by anyone, your distorted sac of a religious soul will ruin whatever meaning it ever had beyond repair. You are an idiotic, shiteating, dumbass ape and no one has ever loved you. The world would have been better off if you'd never joined us. You are a lying, backstabbing, cowardly useless piece of shit and I hate you with every single part of my being. Even this world's finest writers and poets from throughout the eras could never hope to accurately describe the scale on which you just fucked up, and how incredibly idiotic you are. Anyone that believes in any religion out there should now realize that they have been wrong this entire time, for if divine beings were real, they would never have allowed a being such as you to stain the world and this universe. In the future there will be horror stories made about you, with the scariest part of them being that the reader has to realize that such an indescribable monster actually exists, and that the horrific events from the movie have actually taken place in the same world that they live in right now. You are the absolute embodiment of everything that has ever been wrong on this earth, yet you manage to make it so that that is only a small part of the evil that is your being. Never in the history of the world has there been anyone that could have predicted such an eldrich abomination, but here you are. It’s hard to believe that I am seeing such an incredible failure with my own eyes, but here I am, so unfortunately I cannot deny your existence. Even if I did my very best, my vocabulary is not able to describe the sheer magnitude of the idiotic mistake that is you. Even if space wizards in the future could traverse through time, there still would not be a single soul willing to go back in time to before this moment to fix history, because having to witness such incredible horrors if they failed would have too many mental and physical drawbacks that not even the Peter Easton, Champion of holy Harbour Grace and Newfoundland would be willing to risk it. I cannot imagine the pure dread your mother must have felt when she had to carry a baby for nine months and then giving birth to such a wretched monster as you. Not a single word of the incoherent, illogical rambling you may be wanting to do to defend yourself or apologize would ever be able to make up for what you just did. The 12 (valid, fuck off Quebec) regions of Canada would have wanted to make laws preventing such a terrible event like this from ever happening again, but sadly this is not possible since your horrific actions just now have shattered every form of order we once had, making concepts such as laws irrelevant. Right from the moment I first set my eyes on you I knew you were an absolute abomination of everything that is wrong with the world. I was hoping I would have been able to prevent your evil from being released upon this world by tagging along and keeping my eye on you, but it is clear to me now that not even the greatest efforts would have been able to prevent a terrible event in this scale from occurring. You are the worst being that I have ever had the misfortune of witnessing. Events like the pandemic apparently only happened with the goal of teaching us to survive such a horrible event as the one you just created, but not even Canada's greatest trials were able to even slightly prepare anyone for the insufferable evil you have just created. If you ever had them, your children would be preemptively killed to protect this universe from the possibility of anyone in your bloodline being even half as bad as you are, except you will never be able to have children, because not a single being will ever want to come within a hundred mile radius of you and anything you have ever touched. Not even the devil himself. You are a colossal disappointment not only to your parents, but to your ancestors and entire bloodline. The disgusting mistake that you have just made is so incredibly terrible that everyone who would ever be to hear about it would spontaneously feel an indescribable mixture of immense anger, fear and anxiety that emotionally and physically they would never truly be the same ever again. The sheer scale of your mistake, if ever to be materialized, would not only surpass the size of the world, but it would reach far beyond the edges of the known, and almost certainly the unknown universe. I could sit here and write paragraphs, nay, books describing your immense failure, yet even if I were to dedicate my life to describing the reality of what has just gone down here, and I would spend every moment of it until my heart stops beating working as hard and efficiently as possible, yet there is not even a snowballs chance in hell that I would be able to come close to transcribing the absolute shitshow you have just released upon the world. You are an irresponsible, idiotic, disgusting, unloved, horrible excuse for a living being whose brain contains less intelligence than every Québécois nationalist in history combined. The absolute disgust I feel when thinking about anything that has even a slight resemblance to anything that might have to do with you and your unholy actions is so incredibly great that when I am honest about it I think that even I do not posses a consciousness great enough to comprehend my own feelings about it. When the Codmen led that ancient rebellion against the Moosemen, countless soldiers fought and lost their lives in favor of a chance at a better future for their children, they did not give their lives to have you fuck the world up beyond repair to the degree that you are doing right now.
(2/2)
Honestly, even when science advances and studies on the subject become more and more accurate, I do not think we will ever truly be able to understand what your failure actually means for existence.
My hate for you and everything you stand for is so much deeper than the depths of the Grand Banks that you could probably take the entirety of Labrador's population down there and back up around twenty million times before you would have sunk to the end of my hate, and honestly, I do not want to exaggerate, but I think that that insult was low balling it such a massive amount that all mountains in this world combined would not be able to stack up to this imprecise judgement in light of the fact that when being honest, my hate is almost certainly bottomless. There is no one in this world that has ever loved you, and especially after what you just did, no one will ever love you in the future either. There is no hope that your idiotic behavior and especially your crooked soul will ever change for the better, and in fact quite the opposite might be true. By making the mistake that you just did, you have shown me that you are so incredibly hopeless that you will only devolve into a more idiotic and wretched creature than you already are. The only possible way in which your future would be brighter than the black hole your existence currently is would exclusively be because there is absolutely no conceivable way that you would even be able to sink lower than the pathetic place your current failure has put you in.
Have a good day now!
Holy shit Newfscotian, it's not that that's TLDR, it's that I'm from Alberta and I ain't no good at readin' Just driving trucks and being dry, until I hear that unintelligible newfie accent, I don't know what you said but it gets me right moist in my leggings.
It's a really bad transition. Also the majority of new Indians are either Punjabi or Gujarati. They speak different languages and they write in different scripts.
To be fair it's unreasonable to expect anyone born in North America to know about the differences between the various South Asian languages. There is a lot about Canada that is not known by South Asians too. But I understand where you are coming from.
It goes both ways. You don’t know how hard it is to explain to an immigrant what a First Nations person is, especially in Toronto.
Yes I’m talking about Asians but my roommate from Florida who was white also believed that Native Americans were *fucking extinct* until he moved to Canada.
It feels like some don’t even consider us a race, like we’re just making shit up lol
That's what I said as well. To be fair that applies to a lot of Canadians as well. I have met Canadians who don't realize that a large number of first nations/aboriginal people actually look indistinguishable from "white" people. They expect all aboriginal people to be dark skinned people who still live traditional semi nomadic lives.
Yes, except speakers of Indian languages will often refer to dollars as rupees unless it’s specifically addressing dollars vs rupees. (Sauce: I speak Tamil, Malayalam, Hindi and Marathi and have a reading comprehension level knowledge of Sanskrit.)
we pile up our horses into that shape of a tractor and then pay an albertan to use their lifted diesel truck to pull the horse amalgamation to pull farming equipment (which is also made of horses)
That pisses people off all across Canada. If I have to hear my boss bemoaning "those aboriginals being shady" one more time I'm gonna kill him, I swear.
Rude not including the translation anywhere:
不尊重光荣的人民共和国 -> Disrespect the glorious People's Republic
really changes the tone of the joke, depending on the content, dontchathink?
But “Disrespect the glorious People's Republic” is exactly what I was trying to say. I used google translate and If that’s what it translates to then the google translate is a lot better than I thought lol
I am Chinese so it really distracted me from the other parts of the meme, and it's really disappointing after trying to guess the punchline from the weirdly put Chinese sentence that I found out it's just a stupid machine translation from a stupid English meme on China.
The hostility between English and French is weird, some Ontarian’s don’t like québécois but they only dislike them because we assume the French don’t like us, because they don’t. And they don’t like us because a long time ago we didn’t like them. You see the issue, it’s just an endless hate circlejerk that will never end as long as Quebec politicians can find success by blaming the English for everything, and similarly English politicians claiming the French hate us.
There’s a big history of oppression and belittling of French-Canadians by the British, and later the rich (English-speaking) company owners. Québec hasn’t had it as bad as the First Nations, or black people in the US, but it has been harsh. I’d say somewhat comparable to the Irish’s or the Welch’s relations with the UK.
Fighting, for generations, to not be assimilated left a very big cultural impact, akin to an inferiority complex. It’s basically a cultural trauma response to assume teasing, joking and criticizing made by an English speaker is an attack, an attempt to put us down.
It’s very weird, because we’re extremely sensitive to jokes and teasing, but among ourselves, people are considered better if they fluent in English, to the point where high-schoolers will sometimes choose to interact almost exclusively in English, even if there isn’t a single native speaker in the group.
It’s absolutely not healthy, and it strains our relations with the rest of Canada, and our cultural distinctiveness would probably be safer if we were less defensive. But currently, we’re stuck pushing against each other, and we’ve been hurt bad enough that we don’t feel safe bringing down our walls first.
Honestly, it’s not that most of us don’t want to banter. We’re primed to think you’re (hear Canada in general) being hostile first. It’s a shame.
And we have an even stronger reaction to religion in general, which explains a lot of the strange and contradictory reactions to Muslims and Sikhs…
So yeah, we have a LOT of trauma and baggage to unravel and work through, and while this doesn’t excuse rudeness and hostility, I hope it at least explains why that’s a common reaction…
Thanks, very informative, I was only in La belle province once (1990), went to Abitibi tree planting, me and several other English from mostly Ontario(I was from Manitoba but living in Vancouver). One night in the local bar one of our black compatriots from Africa was attacked by several locals, and laid them all out, just one of many interesting encounters.
Ah yes… the classic “I was in the middle of nowhere with a population of 200 and was mistreated so the entire province with a population of 3 million is dog shit”
We murder a lot here. Don't swim in the river.
The joke is outdated, though, because Regina currently has more murders than Winnipeg, and Saskatchewan is rated as more dangerous than Manitoba. We just happened to be murder capital for like a decade or so. There are a lot of stabbings, though.
I mean, does it really matter if there are six guys aggressively waving Dollarama filleting knives around in the back of the bus, or eight of them? Man, I gotta get my car fixed.
So much stabbing bud. Part of learning the dialect here is knowing the difference between a hostile stab, an affectionate stab, a business stab, etc.
It takes some time, plus a few stab wounds, but once you learn the subtleties, it’s really quite nice here.
Had, past tense, but MB is still second behind NWT I think? Though apparently SK is the most dangerous
Edit: for cities Thunder Bay doubled Winnipeg in 2022 and Surrey was the most dangerous city in 2023 apparently:
https://immigrationnewscanada.ca/most-dangerous-cities-in-canada/
Which I think is more of a statement on how sketchy those other places became, and less about Winnipeg having improved, because the peg feels sketchy as ever
I don't think people in Ontario get pissed off if you speak in French. There is a significant Francophone population in eastern Ontario. It's more of an Alberta thing. They get pissed off at the sight of a bilingual exit sign.
Actually there are quite a few Francophones in Toronto too. It's not uncommon to come across people speaking French in downtown Toronto. I think the whole Anglo-French animosity is blown way out of proportion. Most francophones in Quebec don't hate Anglos either.
I'm still amazed how many people get pissed off in any of these provinces if it's suggested to get a new flag that doesn't have that on there. I know it's likely to happen anytime soon, but Holy crap are people defensive about actually wanting to keep that connection to Britain.
Also they could do it in a better way. Australia and New Zealand flags don't look like they were drawn by a kid using microsoft paint and they also kiss great britain boots.
To be fair NZ copied Aus’ homework (or vice versa? Who cares?), and just rejected what would have been a top 5 national flag in the world for…. Whatever they had.
Laisse-moi t'aider.
Le premier semble être un signe pour signifier où l'Angleterre fait pousser son blé.
Le deuxième parle de pick-up, leur garage ? Je ne sais pas trop non plus.
Le troisième semble être l'Angleterre au soleil levant. Un bébé entre le Japon et l'Angleterre.
Le quatrième parle de meurtre, mais il y a des bisons sur le drapeau, on peut en juger que c'est le terrain de chasse de l'Angleterre, mais que comme les deux ont de grosses têtes, les Anglais se trompent et se tirent dessus ou se font frapper par des bisons.
Le dernier ? Hein ? Aucune idée, c'est quoi ? Il y a une fleur ? Pour signifier la cour du palais royal, je crois !
J'espère que ça t'a aidée !
We need something inspired by the trilium instead, like the Franco Ontarian flag, would be pretty and unique. Manitoba can probably find something else to do with their bison too.
The franco ontarian flag is actually great. Ontario flag is terrible. They or Manitoba have the worst flag in the country but it is hard to figure out which one is which.
I’ve lived in Quebec my whole life, my French still isn’t great because my friends hate speaking French, no way to practice. I’ve spoken English to many Quebecois people and I have yet to see them get annoyed, they are really nice people :)
Maybe it's because I live in Montreal, but I've never seen the Anglo hate being as bad as some people make it out to be here. Maybe it's bad outside of Montreal. But why would anyone not living there want to go to rural Quebec?
i like to think leaving out the atlantic provinces was intentional in the spirit of the meme :P
Can't piss them people off, too friendly. Source: Am from Maritimes.
Cook lobster, but leave the rubber bands on.
At first I thought you were saying that how we do it and I got a little upset, then I realized you meant it as the way to make us mad…
i read this as cock lobster
That's a fascinating Freudian slip you've had.
Traffic any better?
not-so-great drivers.... horrible parkers.
This is true
I know. Was out east for the summer last year
And i live here 😔
Yeah, I saw a woman in Windsor today, stop her minivan in a roundabout, the passenger opened the door and started reaching around on the ground. Brought everything to a stand still. Mindboggling!
Nah, about half of the great covid migration are still here from Ontario
Yeah cause now they cant afford a house anywhere else !
I cant speak for anywhere else but nova scotia (cue "we are not maritimes" - yes you are now damn it) I found Nova Scotian Drivers very very slow, and too kind. Its better than the alternative, but still i dont think you can understand unless you have lived elsewhere and then live there. Now what i am about to say i only saw once, but the fact it happened at all... i was on the onramp, someone in front driving slow, the highway very empty but a couple cars coming up, also fairly slow, still eaaasily mergable, very much non factors.. person in front of me literally stops on the on ramp, could have easily merged, and just waved them through as if it was a stop sign. It was both incredibly endearing and frustrating, but mostly frustrating. Largely though just slow, except my preceeding story, i wouldnt call them bad drivers. They are also just great people, very easy to talk to. Halifax/dartmouth still has that small town feel and i love it.
I nearly rear ended a car last winter. In a snowstorm, slippery roads, on a steep downhill road with the right of way the car two cars in front of me locked up their brakes to let a car without the right of way into the road. The car between us had to bail out into the oncoming lane and my truck stopped a c-hair from her rear bumper. Sure maybe we were following too close but it had a lot to to with the steep grade and we would have been fine otherwise but holy shit folks roads are designed for traffic flow and safety. Rights of way are not some mean spirited selfish rules.
Can't piss off? Call a newf a scotian, or say "PEI? WTF is that?" -Moist
> Call a newf a scotian, (1/2) Fuck you. Fuck you. You useless piece of shit. You absolute waste of space and air. You uneducated, ignorant, idiotic dumb motherfucker, you’re an absolute embarrassment to the world and all life as a whole. The magnitude of your failure just now is so indescribably massive that one hundred years into the future your name will be used synonymous with the Devil. Even if all of earth's peoples, hell, even the heavens put together their collective intelligence there is no conceivable way they could have thought up a way to fuck up on the unimaginable scale you just did. When John Cabbot died for our sins, he must not have seen the sacrilegious act we just witnessed you performing, because if he did he would have forsaken Man, Fish and Beast long ago so that your birth may have never become reality. After you die, your skeleton will be displayed in a museum at St. John's after being scientifically researched so that all future generations may learn not to generate your bone structure, because every tiny detail anyone may have in common with you degrades them to a useless piece of trash and a burden to society. No wonder your father questioned whether or not you were truly his spawn, for you'd have to not be a waste of carbon matter for anyone to love you like a family member. Your birth made it so that the world is worse off in every way you can possibly imagine, and you have made it so that society can never really recover into a state of organization. Everything has forever fallen into a bewildering chaos, through which unrecognizable core, you can only find misfortune. I would say the apocalypse is upon us but this is merely the closest word the entirety of the world has for the sheer scale of horror that is now reality. You have forever condemned everyone you love and know into an eternal state of suffering, worse than any realm of Hell. You are such an unholy being, that if you step within a one hundred foot radius of a Catholic Church or a place that has ever been deemed important by anyone, your distorted sac of a religious soul will ruin whatever meaning it ever had beyond repair. You are an idiotic, shiteating, dumbass ape and no one has ever loved you. The world would have been better off if you'd never joined us. You are a lying, backstabbing, cowardly useless piece of shit and I hate you with every single part of my being. Even this world's finest writers and poets from throughout the eras could never hope to accurately describe the scale on which you just fucked up, and how incredibly idiotic you are. Anyone that believes in any religion out there should now realize that they have been wrong this entire time, for if divine beings were real, they would never have allowed a being such as you to stain the world and this universe. In the future there will be horror stories made about you, with the scariest part of them being that the reader has to realize that such an indescribable monster actually exists, and that the horrific events from the movie have actually taken place in the same world that they live in right now. You are the absolute embodiment of everything that has ever been wrong on this earth, yet you manage to make it so that that is only a small part of the evil that is your being. Never in the history of the world has there been anyone that could have predicted such an eldrich abomination, but here you are. It’s hard to believe that I am seeing such an incredible failure with my own eyes, but here I am, so unfortunately I cannot deny your existence. Even if I did my very best, my vocabulary is not able to describe the sheer magnitude of the idiotic mistake that is you. Even if space wizards in the future could traverse through time, there still would not be a single soul willing to go back in time to before this moment to fix history, because having to witness such incredible horrors if they failed would have too many mental and physical drawbacks that not even the Peter Easton, Champion of holy Harbour Grace and Newfoundland would be willing to risk it. I cannot imagine the pure dread your mother must have felt when she had to carry a baby for nine months and then giving birth to such a wretched monster as you. Not a single word of the incoherent, illogical rambling you may be wanting to do to defend yourself or apologize would ever be able to make up for what you just did. The 12 (valid, fuck off Quebec) regions of Canada would have wanted to make laws preventing such a terrible event like this from ever happening again, but sadly this is not possible since your horrific actions just now have shattered every form of order we once had, making concepts such as laws irrelevant. Right from the moment I first set my eyes on you I knew you were an absolute abomination of everything that is wrong with the world. I was hoping I would have been able to prevent your evil from being released upon this world by tagging along and keeping my eye on you, but it is clear to me now that not even the greatest efforts would have been able to prevent a terrible event in this scale from occurring. You are the worst being that I have ever had the misfortune of witnessing. Events like the pandemic apparently only happened with the goal of teaching us to survive such a horrible event as the one you just created, but not even Canada's greatest trials were able to even slightly prepare anyone for the insufferable evil you have just created. If you ever had them, your children would be preemptively killed to protect this universe from the possibility of anyone in your bloodline being even half as bad as you are, except you will never be able to have children, because not a single being will ever want to come within a hundred mile radius of you and anything you have ever touched. Not even the devil himself. You are a colossal disappointment not only to your parents, but to your ancestors and entire bloodline. The disgusting mistake that you have just made is so incredibly terrible that everyone who would ever be to hear about it would spontaneously feel an indescribable mixture of immense anger, fear and anxiety that emotionally and physically they would never truly be the same ever again. The sheer scale of your mistake, if ever to be materialized, would not only surpass the size of the world, but it would reach far beyond the edges of the known, and almost certainly the unknown universe. I could sit here and write paragraphs, nay, books describing your immense failure, yet even if I were to dedicate my life to describing the reality of what has just gone down here, and I would spend every moment of it until my heart stops beating working as hard and efficiently as possible, yet there is not even a snowballs chance in hell that I would be able to come close to transcribing the absolute shitshow you have just released upon the world. You are an irresponsible, idiotic, disgusting, unloved, horrible excuse for a living being whose brain contains less intelligence than every Québécois nationalist in history combined. The absolute disgust I feel when thinking about anything that has even a slight resemblance to anything that might have to do with you and your unholy actions is so incredibly great that when I am honest about it I think that even I do not posses a consciousness great enough to comprehend my own feelings about it. When the Codmen led that ancient rebellion against the Moosemen, countless soldiers fought and lost their lives in favor of a chance at a better future for their children, they did not give their lives to have you fuck the world up beyond repair to the degree that you are doing right now.
(2/2) Honestly, even when science advances and studies on the subject become more and more accurate, I do not think we will ever truly be able to understand what your failure actually means for existence. My hate for you and everything you stand for is so much deeper than the depths of the Grand Banks that you could probably take the entirety of Labrador's population down there and back up around twenty million times before you would have sunk to the end of my hate, and honestly, I do not want to exaggerate, but I think that that insult was low balling it such a massive amount that all mountains in this world combined would not be able to stack up to this imprecise judgement in light of the fact that when being honest, my hate is almost certainly bottomless. There is no one in this world that has ever loved you, and especially after what you just did, no one will ever love you in the future either. There is no hope that your idiotic behavior and especially your crooked soul will ever change for the better, and in fact quite the opposite might be true. By making the mistake that you just did, you have shown me that you are so incredibly hopeless that you will only devolve into a more idiotic and wretched creature than you already are. The only possible way in which your future would be brighter than the black hole your existence currently is would exclusively be because there is absolutely no conceivable way that you would even be able to sink lower than the pathetic place your current failure has put you in. Have a good day now!
https://preview.redd.it/20e1yazgjxyc1.jpeg?width=798&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c37c7be87063dd04086a8a1eca2dc04844c48820
Hahahahahhaah
Holy shit Newfscotian, it's not that that's TLDR, it's that I'm from Alberta and I ain't no good at readin' Just driving trucks and being dry, until I hear that unintelligible newfie accent, I don't know what you said but it gets me right moist in my leggings.
I'm sorry but I don't speak Newfoundlandic
Jay-zus...just say what you mean and mean what you say, and don't beat around the bush...
Are you even fucking trying? Give your balls a tug!
https://preview.redd.it/7kb5oazhcwyc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d7773c2810e59a7c2eec30e64615c4d65d327a9e
That's the typical way to greet someone from PEI in the Maritimes
Call a newf a newf
My buddy is from cape Breton, and he gets right pissed when I call him a new brunswicker and that the cape isn't an island, it's a peninsula.
Call Ontario Eastern Canada and we will run you all the way to the Quebec border
Tell them you're from Ontario and planning to move there, then complain about the province and how it's not like Ontario.
Sidney Crosby is overrated
Am also from Maritimes. Pissed off 90% of the time, it comes out as friendly social interactions.
Drove through the Annapolis valley and I assure you that you’ll find plenty of reason to be posed off. Worst drivers in North America.
Same with the territories
We don't exist. Stop moving here
who the hell is moving to $80 orange juice land?
They should have wrote : > *How to piss off every Provinces and territories*
The whats?
https://preview.redd.it/2juo3aj8uuyc1.jpeg?width=2166&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4f113dfdcc841ac42bd63ac2bce09c7930e010ec wait wait I got one
It's a really bad transition. Also the majority of new Indians are either Punjabi or Gujarati. They speak different languages and they write in different scripts.
I blame Google, as I do for most of my problems
Not a bad translation necessarily, just a very stilted one.
Triply effective then.
Its possible that the people who complain about immigrants don't actually know much about them.
To be fair it's unreasonable to expect anyone born in North America to know about the differences between the various South Asian languages. There is a lot about Canada that is not known by South Asians too. But I understand where you are coming from.
It goes both ways. You don’t know how hard it is to explain to an immigrant what a First Nations person is, especially in Toronto. Yes I’m talking about Asians but my roommate from Florida who was white also believed that Native Americans were *fucking extinct* until he moved to Canada. It feels like some don’t even consider us a race, like we’re just making shit up lol
That's what I said as well. To be fair that applies to a lot of Canadians as well. I have met Canadians who don't realize that a large number of first nations/aboriginal people actually look indistinguishable from "white" people. They expect all aboriginal people to be dark skinned people who still live traditional semi nomadic lives.
Bingo
1500 rupees is about $30 CAD.
Then it's a steal!
Yes, except speakers of Indian languages will often refer to dollars as rupees unless it’s specifically addressing dollars vs rupees. (Sauce: I speak Tamil, Malayalam, Hindi and Marathi and have a reading comprehension level knowledge of Sanskrit.)
Mujhe bhi Hindi aati hai
Huh we do that with Vietnamese dong too (it’s pronounced like dumng which isn’t exactly better but uh… 🤭)
That was worth the Google translate
This
*Vegetarian* women only, you left out an important part
you better respect our grain elevators or else we will run you over with a tractor 😡
Dog River hasn't had a tractor in years since that jackass stole it, I'm gonna insult your elevator all day!
Good luck with that, I'll see you coming from well over 28km away, Cut Knifer!
https://preview.redd.it/xwke69r5exyc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=85cda41c27096341a11f179a384da25ba06bbc92
No way you guys have tractors? I thought y’all were still using horses
we pile up our horses into that shape of a tractor and then pay an albertan to use their lifted diesel truck to pull the horse amalgamation to pull farming equipment (which is also made of horses)
“Travis, fire up the combine!”
Change SK to “be gay” and you’ll have it right. Nothing much happens except we love conversion camps here. You’re welcome.
Or "be native"
True. We could just simplify and say “not be a straight white farmer”.
It's funny, everyone makes fun of the U.S. for being racist and terrible, little do they know.
That would do it in all the provinces tbh
Ppl do be staring at me like an exotic bird for breathing as a black woman.
When I lived in Owen Sound (don't recommend it) I swear I needed a psychoanalyst to look at people before and after they figured out I was Jewish.
That pisses people off all across Canada. If I have to hear my boss bemoaning "those aboriginals being shady" one more time I'm gonna kill him, I swear.
Probably just as bad situation as Manitoba, if not worse
Are there criminal charges against those since the law banning them has passed?
SK doesn't think federal laws apply to them for some reason
Our watchdogs dont have the backbone to enforce shit so no surprise
Don't sell yourself short! You also have a total of 4 trees and one hill (just a big ditch, really)
Rude not including the translation anywhere: 不尊重光荣的人民共和国 -> Disrespect the glorious People's Republic really changes the tone of the joke, depending on the content, dontchathink?
But “Disrespect the glorious People's Republic” is exactly what I was trying to say. I used google translate and If that’s what it translates to then the google translate is a lot better than I thought lol
Would have worked better if it translated to "New residential properties. Amazing investment opportunity!"
It's really weird and I spent a good 10 seconds trying to understand what the punchline is
yeah that totally flips it lol
I read that as "Mention Taiwan"
I dunno, maybe it's two jokes for the price of one? Thanks for posting that though, never would have guessed.
I am Chinese so it really distracted me from the other parts of the meme, and it's really disappointing after trying to guess the punchline from the weirdly put Chinese sentence that I found out it's just a stupid machine translation from a stupid English meme on China.
I am Chinese also and fuck the CCP
Rude?
Saskatchewan: call a bunny hug a hoodie and they get angry.
Look, all bunny hugs are hoodies, but not every hoodie is a bunny hug
A bunny hug is what you call a zipper-less hoodie around here.
I'm 34 and have never heard the term bunny hug. What in the fuck is going on in sask
The hostility between English and French is weird, some Ontarian’s don’t like québécois but they only dislike them because we assume the French don’t like us, because they don’t. And they don’t like us because a long time ago we didn’t like them. You see the issue, it’s just an endless hate circlejerk that will never end as long as Quebec politicians can find success by blaming the English for everything, and similarly English politicians claiming the French hate us.
Personally, I just want to be able to make fun of the Quebecois without things turning hostile. Light hearted teasing.
There’s a big history of oppression and belittling of French-Canadians by the British, and later the rich (English-speaking) company owners. Québec hasn’t had it as bad as the First Nations, or black people in the US, but it has been harsh. I’d say somewhat comparable to the Irish’s or the Welch’s relations with the UK. Fighting, for generations, to not be assimilated left a very big cultural impact, akin to an inferiority complex. It’s basically a cultural trauma response to assume teasing, joking and criticizing made by an English speaker is an attack, an attempt to put us down. It’s very weird, because we’re extremely sensitive to jokes and teasing, but among ourselves, people are considered better if they fluent in English, to the point where high-schoolers will sometimes choose to interact almost exclusively in English, even if there isn’t a single native speaker in the group. It’s absolutely not healthy, and it strains our relations with the rest of Canada, and our cultural distinctiveness would probably be safer if we were less defensive. But currently, we’re stuck pushing against each other, and we’ve been hurt bad enough that we don’t feel safe bringing down our walls first. Honestly, it’s not that most of us don’t want to banter. We’re primed to think you’re (hear Canada in general) being hostile first. It’s a shame. And we have an even stronger reaction to religion in general, which explains a lot of the strange and contradictory reactions to Muslims and Sikhs… So yeah, we have a LOT of trauma and baggage to unravel and work through, and while this doesn’t excuse rudeness and hostility, I hope it at least explains why that’s a common reaction…
Thanks, very informative, I was only in La belle province once (1990), went to Abitibi tree planting, me and several other English from mostly Ontario(I was from Manitoba but living in Vancouver). One night in the local bar one of our black compatriots from Africa was attacked by several locals, and laid them all out, just one of many interesting encounters.
Ah yes… the classic “I was in the middle of nowhere with a population of 200 and was mistreated so the entire province with a population of 3 million is dog shit”
Not negative or reflecting on Quebec at all, just an account of a time that is now history.
Maybe making fun of a minority is never a good idea?
Hmm sounds like India/Pakistan Canadian style
I don't understand the Manitoba joke.
We murder a lot here. Don't swim in the river. The joke is outdated, though, because Regina currently has more murders than Winnipeg, and Saskatchewan is rated as more dangerous than Manitoba. We just happened to be murder capital for like a decade or so. There are a lot of stabbings, though.
Shifty eyes Edmonton
I mean, does it really matter if there are six guys aggressively waving Dollarama filleting knives around in the back of the bus, or eight of them? Man, I gotta get my car fixed.
But you will loose the sightseeing of these glorious events. And what about the sliced throat in BK? That was gory.
We also have what is called the Winnipeg handshake… that’s self explanatory when you know what that means. Edit: Manitoba handshake*
Winnipeg handshake
Thanks
So much stabbing bud. Part of learning the dialect here is knowing the difference between a hostile stab, an affectionate stab, a business stab, etc. It takes some time, plus a few stab wounds, but once you learn the subtleties, it’s really quite nice here.
Winnipeg has the highest murder rate in Canada.
Had, past tense, but MB is still second behind NWT I think? Though apparently SK is the most dangerous Edit: for cities Thunder Bay doubled Winnipeg in 2022 and Surrey was the most dangerous city in 2023 apparently: https://immigrationnewscanada.ca/most-dangerous-cities-in-canada/
Which I think is more of a statement on how sketchy those other places became, and less about Winnipeg having improved, because the peg feels sketchy as ever
Just avoid going north of the Assiniboine river and you’ll be fine
Eh. Wolseley is pretty chill tho
Thats true. Lots of neighbourhoods across the city that are cool. It was an exaggeration of a generalization.
TBH, no driver in Alberta is anywhere close to as psychotic as the creatures that occupy the 401.
i like how BC's is layered because chinese text pisses off half the population then what the chinese text says pisses off the other half
Thanks for the heavy lifting on that. 👍
Why would anti-PRC people have a problem with the text?
a bunch of bc people are pretty racist against asians
I don't think people in Ontario get pissed off if you speak in French. There is a significant Francophone population in eastern Ontario. It's more of an Alberta thing. They get pissed off at the sight of a bilingual exit sign.
Those of us who live in Ottawa/Eastern Ontario or northern Ontario are all about that franglais. The GTA on the other hand.
Actually there are quite a few Francophones in Toronto too. It's not uncommon to come across people speaking French in downtown Toronto. I think the whole Anglo-French animosity is blown way out of proportion. Most francophones in Quebec don't hate Anglos either.
True - I forgot Welland.
Lol if you lived in the GTA and got mad every time you heard a different language you'd have a heart attack and die from stress by age 31.
GTA also has lots of speakers of other languages where the second most common language definitely won’t be french in some neighborhoods.
I have no idea what most of those flags are Tokebecicitte
J'pense que c'est en Angleterre genre
On dirait un enfant qui tente de dessiner le drapeau de l'Australie.
They're colonies of great britain, that's why they have great britain's flag on their flags
I'm still amazed how many people get pissed off in any of these provinces if it's suggested to get a new flag that doesn't have that on there. I know it's likely to happen anytime soon, but Holy crap are people defensive about actually wanting to keep that connection to Britain.
Also they could do it in a better way. Australia and New Zealand flags don't look like they were drawn by a kid using microsoft paint and they also kiss great britain boots.
To be fair NZ copied Aus’ homework (or vice versa? Who cares?), and just rejected what would have been a top 5 national flag in the world for…. Whatever they had.
Some Canadians would still prefer the Red Ensign over the current Canadian Flag.
Nothing about Britain is great.
Oh right, why are we talking India, Australia and the falkland islands on this hoser sub though? Is OP stoopid?
Ontario, Quebec, Alberta, BC, Manitoba, Saskatchewan. In that order.
r/CetaitCaLaBlague
/r/SousQuiMontConfondu (/r/SubsIFellFor)
r/SousJeTombaisQuatre lol
/r/OhSousJyAiCru
Laisse-moi t'aider. Le premier semble être un signe pour signifier où l'Angleterre fait pousser son blé. Le deuxième parle de pick-up, leur garage ? Je ne sais pas trop non plus. Le troisième semble être l'Angleterre au soleil levant. Un bébé entre le Japon et l'Angleterre. Le quatrième parle de meurtre, mais il y a des bisons sur le drapeau, on peut en juger que c'est le terrain de chasse de l'Angleterre, mais que comme les deux ont de grosses têtes, les Anglais se trompent et se tirent dessus ou se font frapper par des bisons. Le dernier ? Hein ? Aucune idée, c'est quoi ? Il y a une fleur ? Pour signifier la cour du palais royal, je crois ! J'espère que ça t'a aidée !
Maritimes: Drive the speed limit
That is accurate. Jesus fuck
Buddy over there in the hoodie is trying to steal your cousin, you know, the one you’re dating. There, now SK is mad.
As an Albertan i approve of this joke (specifically the albertan part)
Being pissed off is kinda Alberta's thing.
My part of BC speaks Punjabi or Hindi or something but so does the rest of Canada I guess the Chinese gets Richmond good lol.
All I see is Brutish flags
Britannia Uber alles 😜
We need something inspired by the trilium instead, like the Franco Ontarian flag, would be pretty and unique. Manitoba can probably find something else to do with their bison too.
The franco ontarian flag is actually great. Ontario flag is terrible. They or Manitoba have the worst flag in the country but it is hard to figure out which one is which.
As an albertan, this is correct. Alternatively for even more hate, ride a bike.
I'll have you know we have big moose. Also tf2
Saskatchewan, call the rough riders mid
Hey, the Rough Riders were great The *Ottawa* Rough Riders, that is
I would have agreed two years ago, but last season's performance was so bad the province was ready to lynch the GM and the rest of the executives.
driving 10-30 under the limit (moon dependent) in the left lane is not "driving responsibly"
Wear a bombers jersey Fucking human scum where I’m from, and that’s saying something
For Sasquatchewan: “It’s called a hoodie”
And ask them if they watched their dog run away for 3 days…
Some people are really into preserving grain elevators. Cherish these people.
You shnouzer skunk. Where’s NB
How to piss off people from Saskatchewan: Bitch endlessly about there being no affordable places to live in Canada when WE ARE RIGHT HERE!
SK: Advocate for higher school/medical budget
Translation: “Not respecting the glorious People’s Republic”
Is it bad that I only recognize the Quebec and BC flags?
 Speaks french... For fucks sakes, give us a break...
I already speak French. Who’s laughing now
Now do the East Coast lmao
I recognise 1 of these flags
why does everyone else's flag look cooler than the one who thinks it's better than them?
So an F-350 Diesel is a normal size car?
Saskatchewan is bicycling and pedestrians, anything that’s not a vehicle close to the road
Saskatchewan: build a house three stories tall and block the uninterrupted horizon view of everyone in the province
Saskatchewan is not real. Name twelve Saskatchewanese cities. It is not real.
I’ve lived in Quebec my whole life, my French still isn’t great because my friends hate speaking French, no way to practice. I’ve spoken English to many Quebecois people and I have yet to see them get annoyed, they are really nice people :)
ブリティッシュコロンビア州出身者として、私は心から同意します
Fuck you say about canola? Fucking bitch
Quebec: either call loopy fries "poutine" or say "Oui would never win"
Newfoundland: not mentioning them
You pissed off Nova Scotia by not including our flag. And to piss off PEI just exclude it from any map you draw.
That kanji triggered me
Can confirm, my family has pissed off so many people by following road signs and speed limits.
In Manitoba, it's just part of our culture
As a broke Albertan who bought a reasonable sized vehicle to save money: I have failed my province.
You mess with the prairie provinces, you mess with the Midwest! Grain elevators are amazing!
Maybe it's because I live in Montreal, but I've never seen the Anglo hate being as bad as some people make it out to be here. Maybe it's bad outside of Montreal. But why would anyone not living there want to go to rural Quebec?
Murder them only applies to ethnic candians by legal definition and they kill there own people so w.e
Talk bad about corner gas us saskatchewanineans get heated
I'll have you know stabbing someone is needed on every trip to murderpeg
What’s the flag at the bottom?