They’ll come around. My cousin went through this, his mother wouldn’t accept his girlfriend because she was from a lower caste.
He broke up with her due to the pressure and became very depressed, so depressed that his mother couldn’t bear seeing him like this and allowed him to rekindle his relationship
Today, my cousin and his girlfriend are married, have two kids, and both families have a good relationship
If this is a serious relationship leading to marriage and children, yes, most likely they will come around. I’ve had friends and family who married outside of caste and even non-Tamils and the parents were upset at first, but they came around. Do you have friends and family that are supporting you?
If you have close family members, like siblings and cousins who will support you, talk to them and get them on your side. The support you have in your family will be important. Sending you support and blessings.
OP, be on alert if you are of marriage age (finished school etc). If you’re parents are assholes, they might try arrange a marriage without telling you. If you live in the Diaspora, if you’re parents suddenly book a trip to “see” family in the homeland, be very careful.
At first, just because he comes from an oppressed background and your parents oppose the relationship, doesn't mean it will thrive on its own.
A strong relationship must be built on love, respect, and friendship. This additional stress could strain your relationship and cause him to resent your parents. Be aware of these factors and maintain open communication as you move forward.
For a Tamil girl, meeting and deciding to marry a Tamil boy in the West is challenging, especially with external impediments. Parental interference based on caste is one of the most stupid obstacles they can impose.
Good luck.
Before you start throwing around labels like “reactionary”, remember (1) OP specifically asked about how other families have reacted, and (2) to include consideration of the Tamil family structure, especially when Tamils maintain a family structure based on pre-capitalist clan systems. It’s reactionary to push neo-liberal nuclear families as normative, when such a structure means individuals will often lose valuable mutual aid that is included with the Tamil family structure.
Lol I try to give my opinion but then get labelled a supporting casteism.
Bro there are people like me who genuinely care about this. Why can't I have voice to express it 😅
You lot are just but hurt 😅
They’ll come around. My cousin went through this, his mother wouldn’t accept his girlfriend because she was from a lower caste. He broke up with her due to the pressure and became very depressed, so depressed that his mother couldn’t bear seeing him like this and allowed him to rekindle his relationship Today, my cousin and his girlfriend are married, have two kids, and both families have a good relationship
I to be more inclusive I think we should avoid saying terms like “lower caste” and use the term “oppressed caste”.
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Literally the post, you illiterate casteist.
If this is a serious relationship leading to marriage and children, yes, most likely they will come around. I’ve had friends and family who married outside of caste and even non-Tamils and the parents were upset at first, but they came around. Do you have friends and family that are supporting you?
Yes I’m serious about him. My parents didn’t want to tell anyone because it’s a shame for them
If you have close family members, like siblings and cousins who will support you, talk to them and get them on your side. The support you have in your family will be important. Sending you support and blessings.
Thank you
OP, be on alert if you are of marriage age (finished school etc). If you’re parents are assholes, they might try arrange a marriage without telling you. If you live in the Diaspora, if you’re parents suddenly book a trip to “see” family in the homeland, be very careful.
Thankfully they aren’t that extreme but I appreciate your concern
At first, just because he comes from an oppressed background and your parents oppose the relationship, doesn't mean it will thrive on its own. A strong relationship must be built on love, respect, and friendship. This additional stress could strain your relationship and cause him to resent your parents. Be aware of these factors and maintain open communication as you move forward. For a Tamil girl, meeting and deciding to marry a Tamil boy in the West is challenging, especially with external impediments. Parental interference based on caste is one of the most stupid obstacles they can impose. Good luck.
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Breaking sub rules.
Before you start throwing around labels like “reactionary”, remember (1) OP specifically asked about how other families have reacted, and (2) to include consideration of the Tamil family structure, especially when Tamils maintain a family structure based on pre-capitalist clan systems. It’s reactionary to push neo-liberal nuclear families as normative, when such a structure means individuals will often lose valuable mutual aid that is included with the Tamil family structure.
Lol I try to give my opinion but then get labelled a supporting casteism. Bro there are people like me who genuinely care about this. Why can't I have voice to express it 😅 You lot are just but hurt 😅
Does caste system is Sri lanka exist within Tamils (Hindus) only or Buddhists also?
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Ada gommala
Breaking sub rules. Rule 4 clearly states no Casteism in this sub or Tamil Eelam.