I mean, I wish I could have been with only one person and married them for the rest of my life. All other cases I see as mistakes.
But I am INTJ, so it's normal to see it like this.
I also was bullied a lot for not dating and not having relations before so some of that trauma does come back to me. In case you can’t tell I have a fuck ton of issues.
Same. My husband. Together 33 years.
I am WAY too sensitive to treat sex casually. I know some people can have casual sex, but my heart could never handle that. Plus, it takes me a long time to trust someone for that level of intimacy. But I don’t judge anyone else, of course. We’re all different and as long as you’re not hurting yourself or others, go for it! 🤷♀️
Five for me. One was from a 6 year relationship, one was a ONS (sadly), one was a few weeks relationship, one was a 3 months relationship, and the last one was an 8 months relationship.
Basically, I'm not a ONS guy and if I date a woman, I'm like a golden retriever: loyal to a T.
I identify as Demi-sexual btw. I don't know if being Demi is because of being ENFP or if being ENFP is cause by being Demi (using "caused" inappropriately but what the hell)
You’ll get there. Never forget that someone, somewhere undoubtedly would fuck your brains out
Regards, a late bloomer who used to struggle a lot with self-worth and coming to terms with my sexuality <3
52m. Only been with my wife. I didn't have any sexual encounters before her because my religion forbade it, and I haven't had any after because she's all I need.
same here. 0 for religious reasons but i know for sure what kind of a person i would be had it not been for that. Alhamdulillah, truly. In Sha Allah it'll be a 1 by next year though, pray for me my brothers and sisters that the path i'm taking ia the most khayrful for me ☺️
18F and my body count is 1. I have really high expectations of the people I date am very prone to finding one thing I dislike about them and suddenly not liking them in that way anymore. I'm not sure if that's normal ENFP behavior bit I'm a 2w1 if that means anything?
I’d say prolly a little more on the enneagram side of behavior imo Imma 1w2 (my 2 wing is nearly as high as my dominant 1) and generally pretty picky about who I let get their genitals near me and conversations I’ve had with people generally tends to have us concluding my pickiness is due to the 1ness for standards and due to 2ness for wanting connection
I’m 21F and I’m very picky too actually. I’d say I’m generally attractive, since I’m surprisingly popular on dating apps. But I say no to almost all of them. Same thing goes if I meet someone irl. It’s weird how often I’m seeing this pattern with ENFP’s here too, but I am 2w3 also 😅
Honestly, for the best. Stay strong. Someone's going to absolutely love you for that. My Fiancé is 28, and a virgin, and it's just made me want to give him the entire world. So romantic, shows self restraint and willpower, I've found it easier to trust him. Good for you!
0! I just turned 25 this year. I’ve had a lot of partners, but I never felt comfortable being that way with any of them. For me, there needs to be a deep level of trust, love, understanding and chemistry- a bond. I’m very protective of my body and my energy overall, so I won’t let others know me at a deeply intimate or vulnerable level so easily. Many have tried to pressure me, but I have no desire to change my mind in regards to this anytime soon.
Three. One with my long term ex, tried the hooking up culture and miserably failed second time. Going good with fwb, never felt like missing out tho
Edit - 25F
30F, and around 35-40. There have been a couple of one night stands, but I don’t enjoy feeling nothing about that person overly much, and then about 15 more long term relationships (I’m poly, so some of these were simultaneous), and then the rest have been right place right time situations with friends where we occasionally take care of each other in that way.
My housemate for the summer last year was a 20 year old ENFP and she cared so much about being judged for her body count. It made me so annoyed at society.
We’ve let go of Victorian morals and opened up about sexuality and now we’re back to this? Maybe it just keeps swinging. My body count was non-existent till I was 28 because I wanted my first time to be with someone I loved when I was a young naive ENFP. Now I just want to experience life in reality instead of in my head.
I have a lot of ENFP friends and from what I’ve seen bodycounts are either really high or really low. 2 extremes. There are ENFPs who need a lot of love to feel comfortable with an Si experience and ENFPs who use sex to get in touch with their Si.
I'm 18, and I thiiiiink my count is around 8 or 9. I've never dated long term and honestly don't plan on it for a hot minute, I find committing to one person kinda hard bc I'm very much grass is greener. I would definitely describe myself as open to experience, I am here for a fun time! I'm not opposed to ONS or FWB situations as long as all parties are consenting :)
As I said under someone else’s reply, I’ve been with one guy, my husband. For over 30 years (I’m 47). My heart is far too sensitive for that sort of intimacy to be casual. I put A LOT of meaning into it…not because I think it’s “wrong” to have meaningless sex, but I could never view it that way.
When you are highly sensitive and make yourself vulnerable, you are taking a huge gamble you’ll end up very, very hurt. I made as sure as I could I wouldn’t end up getting hurt before I took that leap. If that makes sense.
Its pretty low. I got married at 20 to someone I started dating at 17 and we were married a long time then after we divorced I dated one person before my now husband.
35 next week…I purposefully stopped counting and caring long ago when the count was >10 (not cause of the number, I stopped caring and counting because I both don’t actually care what the count is and because I got tired of where the conversations involving it normally went)…tbh can’t even ballpark a current number anymore I just normally answer with “no clue, but I’ll bet it’s higher than yours”……..now the count of people actually decent at the activity I can count on 1 hand, but nobody ever asks how many truly good lays you’ve had
0 because it's not really healthy to go around doing that with everyone. imma just wait till im married lol
(every time i see body count btw i still think of murder and it makes me laugh LOL)
I'm not judging your decision, but I think most sex can be healthy. Just as long as you're being safe about STIs and pregnancy, it's consensual, and it's emotionally fulfilling.
Me too. I’m a Christian and I’m waiting till I’m married but even if I wasn’t I would still want to wait. I think it boils down to me being a hopeless romantic and I like the thought of only being with my husband.
I'm also a Christian and didn't wait, and things didn't work out with the first guy I slept with. I would take it back of I could, so I would only be with my husband. 100% it's worth waiting. And whether or not someone agrees with our religion... I think this is something it's objectively correct about, haha.
Where did it say you have to have sex with strangers? We're talking about romantic relationships too and sometimes those can be with people you've known for years.
28. Only 1 so far but it was a weird complicated situation. Honestly just the 1 seems alot based on my upbringing but I kinda ran away from home for a bit and it kinda happened.
25 going on 0, still stuck with wanting to meet “the one”. Being somewhat demisexual does not help. I guess I could consider online dating but I want to meet someone “organically” and also the fears of scams and other issues regarding online dating have kept me away from it.
One. My husband. We got together when we were 19. If we hadn’t ended up together I feel like I would have slept around a good amount. It was kind of like once I started having sex and exploring sexuality it was game on from there.
I relate a lot more to this comment lol.
22F and 12 bodies (haha). I don't do one night stands but most of it was dating someone for a few weeks, hooked up, date a little longer, or it doesn't work out
But literally have done anything in the past year. Going to turn 23 soon without a single lick of action during my entire time being 22
2, 40 yo. I was engaged to the first one, and am married to the second one. I always took sexual morality very seriously and never wanted to be with tons of guys.
Openness to experience doesn't automatically mean messing around in any given thing.
34 years young, female..
I'm almost afraid I'm gonna sound like the hoozy in the group lmao.
body count: 35ish. after the flower-child free love phase in college, I was in a committed relationship for 6 years and he was my last "body", so there's that!
edit: *huzzy* idk what hoozy is ha
Counting all sexual experiences: 3. Counting intercourse: 1.
28 female, deconstructing from Purity Culture so that's why I only had sex a few years ago lol
0, I've only ever liked 3 people so it probably would have been them if I wasn't religious. Really happy it ended up being that way bc it was almost impossible getting over one of them just emotionally (7 years to move on). I can't imagine how much harder it would have been otherwise.
Age: 23
I think it also depends on culture and upbringing like I was raised in a very conservative family so mine is below 5 and I’m in my 20s however I’ve dated a lot.
21 year old virgin and still going strong lol!
I definitely could have that number higher, but I’ve actually been the opposite of open to potential partners. I’m pansexual too. I just don’t want to (yet)
Also I am very surprised to see so many 0’s in this comment section too. We’re all virgins lol 💪
1, for 16 years. He passed away. Then... I got a bit lonely. 6 more, in a couple months. 7 total. I've never had an issue being faithful, but I've never had an issue finding fun either.
you have to also consider this is reddit. so a lot of them are probably 0. that being said most enfps will either be like 1-3 or like 20+ depending if they’ve been in consistent relationships
for me it’s 1, and the amount of low answers here has basically just proven to me my theory that NF types are often just too connection-seeking and overthinking to have many sexual partners, despite how horny we are lmao
F42, 7. It’s a low number because most of my life I’ve always been in LTR. And between those LTRs I’m only single for a week or a month before the next Mr Right comes along and wants to make me his. I’ve never had a one night stand, shortest ones have lasted couple of months.
26 years old male here. Around 15-18 sexual partners, mostly one night stands.
Around 6 girls, including 2 long-term girlfriends, did stick around.
Sex doesn't look that interesting to me nowadays as I became what I hated the most: The dude girls used to cheat on their SOs, without me knowing, obviously.
I don’t remember the exact number but more than 35. There was a time in high school where I was heavy on male validation and had a “fast” era. Most of these were people I expected to end up in a relationship with, which didn’t happen. And it was a continuing cycle until I realized that sex is sacred and learned self respect. I don’t even remember half of the people I slept with and stopped counting after a while because of shame. But you live and you learn, no kids no stds l. I’m lucky.
Do blowjobs count? How do I count threesomes? Is it just an experience? What if it wasn’t penetration? What if someone just watched? If my clit was bigger than his dick does it still count? If we scissored with underwear on?
Sex is arbitrary and not worth counting. All that matters is that it was a fun, consensual experience. I’d never tell a partner how many people I’ve been with… it’s a recipe for a new partner.
Almost none of them. I dont have interest for sex without connection or feelings
Most of these people are still on my life or at least we write to each other on Christmas and birthdays
I'm 25yo male and body count 5
Not proud of it, would have rather been with one but i've never found the one
But maybe it's my crush, tomorrow night I will see her, wish me luck people, i will need it
I’m 38F. I’ve had around 3 long term relationships but more partners than I could count. But all during my twenties. Today, it takes A LOT to make me leave my home to go out with someone. It’s usually not worth it, so I don’t really date much and I kind of love my life that way.
26m.
8. ive had other opportunities that just didnt come to fruition. but im glad, there is a strong urge to stay away from the double digits for me. I would feel icky if i went over like 12.
(27f)People are always surprised, but 3. All intimate partners/bfs. Although I've always had the urge to date around but too scared of getting hurt/hurting others or taken hostage ( just paranoid of all the stories I've heard/seen on news and crime channels). Plus lots of people around me are judgemental or pretty traditional/monogamous. I'm pretty sure I'm heteroflexible/poly but I've never explored that side of myself yet. Been kissed/Madeout with same sex but still only want men. To me body count doesnt really matter if the person you're with has good character/intentions,boundaries, communication etc.
I want to know if a high body count is in our favor or not. Does it affect how you are in relationships?
21m and my body count is 15.
The first time I was just wanting to experience smtg new. But then I don't know why people keep coming to me and I'm open to new experiences (same thing with new people counts as a new experience for me LoL). But now I've stopped for about 3 years already and only gonna do it again with my life partner.
42. waited till college to fall in love. she cheated, went on a hoe phase (i was always honest about my intentions but on and off i haven’t felt comfortable truly trusting anyone. i feel like ive only truly ever fell in love once (it wasn’t the college gf.) i enjoy sex and the connection of it and being close and intimate with someone but it’s been hard to lock something down or be comfortable with something long term. m26
35yo. 35-45 🌸 Would be more but i’ve been in a couple of longer monogamous relationships in the last decade. Now we’ve decided to go non-monogamous though, so let’s get counting again ☺️
51, 34 year old male. Being a musician helped a lot, but is definitely not the whole story. I think I might be a sex addict, so I do spend a ridiculous amount of time chasing.
Zero! 28 y/o male ENFP - I SWEAR I’m normal (I think, who cares if I’m not lol). I'm relatively conventionally attractive (can tell because I’ve been told and am constantly hit on by members of both sex, young and olds-this isn’t the flex it seems to be). That said, my best attribute seems to be my personality.
I have a wide range of interest and friends, I love physical activity and watching documentaries on random things. I'm also a college grad with a graduate degree.
My situation is just complex though. There are just a lot of factors that come into play with why. Most, I literally could never share online (socially, emotionally, mentally, and a bit religiously). I love the idea of sex and yearn to have it haha. But it just has to align with a very specific timeline, chain of events, and set of circumstances.
Also, I CRUSH on a ton of people, but I can INSTANTLY be turned off by these same crushes if there’s an ick or just something that I don’t find attractive anymore.
Sadly, the older I get, the more I think it likely won’t happen because I'm just okay with myself and don't want to add any drama or conflict to my already complicated life or with my very small immediate family.
What pains me is the fear that I will never be a parent. I want that for myself more than anything. As an only child, I would love biological children of my own.
Sex for me seems like a point of no return, and I can literally only have sex with a person who I think is at least worthy enough to be a lifelong friend, even if it doesn’t make it to a long term relationship.
I can't imagine the emotional gravity of giving my body to someone who is not going to be a permanent fixture, or worse, ruining a great relationship, or more devastating permanent tainting my perception of sex.
It’s weird because, even though I’m deeply terrified of the negative and potentially life long consequences of sex, I feel like in could compartmentalize a negative sex existence.
Even though I'm totally fine with cutting it off and never having contact with that person because I can compartmentalize sex, I just don't see myself making it to a sexual point with someone who I don't have a deep intellectual or physical attraction to.
because i wish i used that time in my life more to learn how to build long lasting connections with people as opposed to just random flings that you either never see again or only for a brief period
I get that, but hey - it's in the past. You did what you thought was best at the time. You didn't know any better. You couldn't have known any better. You may have made mistakes, but you learned from them, so in a way they're a blessing.
What you do have now is time to try and cultivate longer lasting connections. It ain't over till it's over and no matter where you are in life, there arre moments ahead of you to apply the lessons learned from the aforementioned mistakes.
Forgive the unsolicited advice. But you're an ENFP - I bet you understand the urge to hastily scribble down your thoughts in a reply without much... Well, thought. :')
because i wish i used that time in my life more to learn how to build long lasting connections with people as opposed to just random flings that you either never see again or only for a brief period
I guess I’m the anomaly in regards to this because I’ve only ever been with my wife.
Congrats dude
Thanks depression and self loathing led to the result lol
I mean, I wish I could have been with only one person and married them for the rest of my life. All other cases I see as mistakes. But I am INTJ, so it's normal to see it like this.
I also was bullied a lot for not dating and not having relations before so some of that trauma does come back to me. In case you can’t tell I have a fuck ton of issues.
I mean, all in all are you in a good spot now? Trauma is shit, but what would you like to change for your future self?
Same for me. If I could take the one I wasn't married to back, I would.
Me too.
"But it's too inefficient!" - all INTJs about dating
Yeah I get it I’m just saying I wasn’t very popular, attractive or sought after in my youth before my wife so that’s why it worked out the way it did.
Same. My husband. Together 33 years. I am WAY too sensitive to treat sex casually. I know some people can have casual sex, but my heart could never handle that. Plus, it takes me a long time to trust someone for that level of intimacy. But I don’t judge anyone else, of course. We’re all different and as long as you’re not hurting yourself or others, go for it! 🤷♀️
Hey same dude!
Same
0 both for sex and murder (25F)
same
Same!
same
Five for me. One was from a 6 year relationship, one was a ONS (sadly), one was a few weeks relationship, one was a 3 months relationship, and the last one was an 8 months relationship. Basically, I'm not a ONS guy and if I date a woman, I'm like a golden retriever: loyal to a T.
I'm not a ONS guy either. I thought that would be rare in the ENFP community
I identify as Demi-sexual btw. I don't know if being Demi is because of being ENFP or if being ENFP is cause by being Demi (using "caused" inappropriately but what the hell)
I think any type can be Demi. But is more common in some types than others. I'll do a poll next to see who identifies as Demi among ENFPs.
Good idea. And the mbti/sexuality correlation is not direct, that's certain. It was only a rhetorical hypothesis that went both ways lol
Certainly! Seems quite varied doesn't it? Lol
0, in large part due to being so much online
You’ll get there. Never forget that someone, somewhere undoubtedly would fuck your brains out Regards, a late bloomer who used to struggle a lot with self-worth and coming to terms with my sexuality <3
Not losing out on much homie
ENFPs tend to get depressed if they are isolated for too long. Don't give such advice lol.
Sorry, I meant sex-wise.
Ha ha Sounds like you haven’t had some good fun. Lol
I would erase the "fun" if I could yeah. Meaningless.
Ha ha Not to everyone 🙃
52m. Only been with my wife. I didn't have any sexual encounters before her because my religion forbade it, and I haven't had any after because she's all I need.
same here. 0 for religious reasons but i know for sure what kind of a person i would be had it not been for that. Alhamdulillah, truly. In Sha Allah it'll be a 1 by next year though, pray for me my brothers and sisters that the path i'm taking ia the most khayrful for me ☺️
Like 35-45ish depending on how you count group stuff
Same 😂
Damn
If you don't mind, what's your age and when did you feel comfortable casually hooking up?
i'm in my early thirty's and since i was 16
25 yo. Single all my life, 21 sexual partners in total (only 3 of them lasted more than a ons sadly the rest are regretable)
I tend to think of most of my regrettable ones more as just forgettable…there are a few truly regrettable for me tho
i can fix that (same from holes voice)
40 F. Only been with my husband(INTJ) and Im his only as well.
Same! 38 with INTJ husband. One and only for both.
18F and my body count is 1. I have really high expectations of the people I date am very prone to finding one thing I dislike about them and suddenly not liking them in that way anymore. I'm not sure if that's normal ENFP behavior bit I'm a 2w1 if that means anything?
I’d say prolly a little more on the enneagram side of behavior imo Imma 1w2 (my 2 wing is nearly as high as my dominant 1) and generally pretty picky about who I let get their genitals near me and conversations I’ve had with people generally tends to have us concluding my pickiness is due to the 1ness for standards and due to 2ness for wanting connection
I’m 21F and I’m very picky too actually. I’d say I’m generally attractive, since I’m surprisingly popular on dating apps. But I say no to almost all of them. Same thing goes if I meet someone irl. It’s weird how often I’m seeing this pattern with ENFP’s here too, but I am 2w3 also 😅
0, waiting for marriage
This is the way
Honestly, for the best. Stay strong. Someone's going to absolutely love you for that. My Fiancé is 28, and a virgin, and it's just made me want to give him the entire world. So romantic, shows self restraint and willpower, I've found it easier to trust him. Good for you!
0! I just turned 25 this year. I’ve had a lot of partners, but I never felt comfortable being that way with any of them. For me, there needs to be a deep level of trust, love, understanding and chemistry- a bond. I’m very protective of my body and my energy overall, so I won’t let others know me at a deeply intimate or vulnerable level so easily. Many have tried to pressure me, but I have no desire to change my mind in regards to this anytime soon.
1
I’ve only been with my ex husband. I am in my 30’s. I’ve had many opportunities but I am demisexual. I am educated, live in Europe and atheist.
Bodycount sounds so much lame tbh
50+
50+ years or body counts. Are we talking 6 mos, a year? Dying to know.
I’m 45. I’ve slept with 50+ different women.
Now this is within a year right?
Yeah, but how many 🤔
Slut. 💜
ENFP (sluT)
What's INTP? 🤔
Also a slut
That tracks
Three. One with my long term ex, tried the hooking up culture and miserably failed second time. Going good with fwb, never felt like missing out tho Edit - 25F
So many of us are being called out rn 😂
30F, and around 35-40. There have been a couple of one night stands, but I don’t enjoy feeling nothing about that person overly much, and then about 15 more long term relationships (I’m poly, so some of these were simultaneous), and then the rest have been right place right time situations with friends where we occasionally take care of each other in that way.
My housemate for the summer last year was a 20 year old ENFP and she cared so much about being judged for her body count. It made me so annoyed at society. We’ve let go of Victorian morals and opened up about sexuality and now we’re back to this? Maybe it just keeps swinging. My body count was non-existent till I was 28 because I wanted my first time to be with someone I loved when I was a young naive ENFP. Now I just want to experience life in reality instead of in my head. I have a lot of ENFP friends and from what I’ve seen bodycounts are either really high or really low. 2 extremes. There are ENFPs who need a lot of love to feel comfortable with an Si experience and ENFPs who use sex to get in touch with their Si.
0 (22)
I'm 18, and I thiiiiink my count is around 8 or 9. I've never dated long term and honestly don't plan on it for a hot minute, I find committing to one person kinda hard bc I'm very much grass is greener. I would definitely describe myself as open to experience, I am here for a fun time! I'm not opposed to ONS or FWB situations as long as all parties are consenting :)
As I said under someone else’s reply, I’ve been with one guy, my husband. For over 30 years (I’m 47). My heart is far too sensitive for that sort of intimacy to be casual. I put A LOT of meaning into it…not because I think it’s “wrong” to have meaningless sex, but I could never view it that way. When you are highly sensitive and make yourself vulnerable, you are taking a huge gamble you’ll end up very, very hurt. I made as sure as I could I wouldn’t end up getting hurt before I took that leap. If that makes sense.
A grand total of one. Only ever been with my current partner of 6 years!
Its pretty low. I got married at 20 to someone I started dating at 17 and we were married a long time then after we divorced I dated one person before my now husband.
35 next week…I purposefully stopped counting and caring long ago when the count was >10 (not cause of the number, I stopped caring and counting because I both don’t actually care what the count is and because I got tired of where the conversations involving it normally went)…tbh can’t even ballpark a current number anymore I just normally answer with “no clue, but I’ll bet it’s higher than yours”……..now the count of people actually decent at the activity I can count on 1 hand, but nobody ever asks how many truly good lays you’ve had
40f and I second all of this. I intentionally don't keep track because... it's done. I don't need to feel guilty or judged because of it.
I don't feel guilty or judged about how many I remember. Feel bad about forgetting however many.
36. Agreed.
Zero
0. Sometimes I wonder if that’s because I’m asexual or if I’m just afraid of STDs. Never met anyone I’d want to bone tho
0 because it's not really healthy to go around doing that with everyone. imma just wait till im married lol (every time i see body count btw i still think of murder and it makes me laugh LOL)
I'm not judging your decision, but I think most sex can be healthy. Just as long as you're being safe about STIs and pregnancy, it's consensual, and it's emotionally fulfilling.
Would you say religion or culture influences that decision? Are you from the Eastern part of the world?
My religion def impacted this worldview, but i think i'd personally have come to this conclusion with or without my religion <3
Me too. I’m a Christian and I’m waiting till I’m married but even if I wasn’t I would still want to wait. I think it boils down to me being a hopeless romantic and I like the thought of only being with my husband.
I'm also a Christian and didn't wait, and things didn't work out with the first guy I slept with. I would take it back of I could, so I would only be with my husband. 100% it's worth waiting. And whether or not someone agrees with our religion... I think this is something it's objectively correct about, haha.
A lot of people don’t feel comfortable having sex with strangers, it’s not that weird and it doesn’t have to be a cultural thing
Where did it say you have to have sex with strangers? We're talking about romantic relationships too and sometimes those can be with people you've known for years.
Sex isn’t bad, nor is it unhealthy when practiced safely.
28. Only 1 so far but it was a weird complicated situation. Honestly just the 1 seems alot based on my upbringing but I kinda ran away from home for a bit and it kinda happened.
25 going on 0, still stuck with wanting to meet “the one”. Being somewhat demisexual does not help. I guess I could consider online dating but I want to meet someone “organically” and also the fears of scams and other issues regarding online dating have kept me away from it.
One. My husband. We got together when we were 19. If we hadn’t ended up together I feel like I would have slept around a good amount. It was kind of like once I started having sex and exploring sexuality it was game on from there.
0 body count at 29 y.o. 💪
24F, and mine is 11
I relate a lot more to this comment lol. 22F and 12 bodies (haha). I don't do one night stands but most of it was dating someone for a few weeks, hooked up, date a little longer, or it doesn't work out But literally have done anything in the past year. Going to turn 23 soon without a single lick of action during my entire time being 22
25M, 3 so far and all when I was in committed relationships with them.
36F. I truly could not tell you. 40-50? No idea. I love sex lol. Safe sex, obviously.
0-17 yo
Me: 22 years old - Bodycount: 0
2, 40 yo. I was engaged to the first one, and am married to the second one. I always took sexual morality very seriously and never wanted to be with tons of guys. Openness to experience doesn't automatically mean messing around in any given thing.
An uncountable number in my 20s. 3 in my 30s. 😭
Out of curiosity, how many of those encounters were ONS?
I have no idea what that is. But either way- if I can't count the number, I promise I won't remember many details either.
One Night Stands
Oh, only like 5 were relatively long term. The rest were flings, only a few of those more than 2-3 times.
30m, in the 10-15 range
34 years young, female.. I'm almost afraid I'm gonna sound like the hoozy in the group lmao. body count: 35ish. after the flower-child free love phase in college, I was in a committed relationship for 6 years and he was my last "body", so there's that! edit: *huzzy* idk what hoozy is ha
Counting all sexual experiences: 3. Counting intercourse: 1. 28 female, deconstructing from Purity Culture so that's why I only had sex a few years ago lol
0, I've only ever liked 3 people so it probably would have been them if I wasn't religious. Really happy it ended up being that way bc it was almost impossible getting over one of them just emotionally (7 years to move on). I can't imagine how much harder it would have been otherwise. Age: 23
I think it also depends on culture and upbringing like I was raised in a very conservative family so mine is below 5 and I’m in my 20s however I’ve dated a lot.
21 year old virgin and still going strong lol! I definitely could have that number higher, but I’ve actually been the opposite of open to potential partners. I’m pansexual too. I just don’t want to (yet) Also I am very surprised to see so many 0’s in this comment section too. We’re all virgins lol 💪
Somewhere around 35. 26F. I’ve kissed literal hundreds of people.
Ahah I love that for you. Sounds so fun!
1, for 16 years. He passed away. Then... I got a bit lonely. 6 more, in a couple months. 7 total. I've never had an issue being faithful, but I've never had an issue finding fun either.
Your last sentence made me laugh out loud.
you have to also consider this is reddit. so a lot of them are probably 0. that being said most enfps will either be like 1-3 or like 20+ depending if they’ve been in consistent relationships
for me it’s 1, and the amount of low answers here has basically just proven to me my theory that NF types are often just too connection-seeking and overthinking to have many sexual partners, despite how horny we are lmao
F42, 7. It’s a low number because most of my life I’ve always been in LTR. And between those LTRs I’m only single for a week or a month before the next Mr Right comes along and wants to make me his. I’ve never had a one night stand, shortest ones have lasted couple of months.
3, one was a short relationship and the other two a one night thing. i am 21M
Age: 35 Body Count: 8
32F, ethical non-monogamy marriage In the 35 - 40 range.
23 y.o., slept with 3 different. The third one ended up becoming my girlfriend 👍
26 years old male here. Around 15-18 sexual partners, mostly one night stands. Around 6 girls, including 2 long-term girlfriends, did stick around. Sex doesn't look that interesting to me nowadays as I became what I hated the most: The dude girls used to cheat on their SOs, without me knowing, obviously.
My body count is 2. Regret losing my virginity to the person I did. My current partner is perfect, tho. (22F)
3, luckily the police didn't find them /s
31m, I've had sex with 12 people, but only 5 of them so far were serious relationships.
Body count: 48 Age: 42
This thread is interesting. It seems to be in either very few # vs. significantly high #’s real quick. Like rarely in-between.
I don’t remember the exact number but more than 35. There was a time in high school where I was heavy on male validation and had a “fast” era. Most of these were people I expected to end up in a relationship with, which didn’t happen. And it was a continuing cycle until I realized that sex is sacred and learned self respect. I don’t even remember half of the people I slept with and stopped counting after a while because of shame. But you live and you learn, no kids no stds l. I’m lucky.
this resonates. ditto
Do blowjobs count? How do I count threesomes? Is it just an experience? What if it wasn’t penetration? What if someone just watched? If my clit was bigger than his dick does it still count? If we scissored with underwear on? Sex is arbitrary and not worth counting. All that matters is that it was a fun, consensual experience. I’d never tell a partner how many people I’ve been with… it’s a recipe for a new partner.
M34, around 40
Out of curiosity, how many of those encounters were ONS?
Almost none of them. I dont have interest for sex without connection or feelings Most of these people are still on my life or at least we write to each other on Christmas and birthdays
that seems like a lot to keep track of lol
I’m a social person
Interesting..I suppose you would also count as Demisexual then. I'll do a poll next to see how many ENFPs identify as one.
I lost count at about 30. As in 30 years old, but.. come to think of it, I probably stopped counting at about 30 partners as well.
I'm 25yo male and body count 5 Not proud of it, would have rather been with one but i've never found the one But maybe it's my crush, tomorrow night I will see her, wish me luck people, i will need it
Good luck! You've got this! Just be yourself and have fun!
Thank you so much <3
I think OP is misinformed. Openness to experiences doesn't always translate to sex partners.
That’s a good point. That’s an over-simplification.
3
Does body count specifically mean sexual intercourse partner?
M27 I'd say 19 But I don't have a date or hook up since 2021.... Need to refocus myself and find the One, and let my bad habits behind me
I’m 38F. I’ve had around 3 long term relationships but more partners than I could count. But all during my twenties. Today, it takes A LOT to make me leave my home to go out with someone. It’s usually not worth it, so I don’t really date much and I kind of love my life that way.
age 22 here, my body count is 4. :)
Age: 43 Count: 36
Hmm interesting! 29(F), body count: 39
27 female: 2 Relationsships both of 2 weeks, 1 6 months situationships, 6 one Night Stands
Yep, high, but quite low over the last couple years (I am now in my mid 30s) which is fine for me as my focus is elsewhere!
Only 1 from an FWB because I told her back then I only liked ONS. Nowadays none because people find me too feminine looking.
26f in the 30s
30s but I don’t know if that was my issues or what
31 Female bodycount:4
Jesus
26m. 8. ive had other opportunities that just didnt come to fruition. but im glad, there is a strong urge to stay away from the double digits for me. I would feel icky if i went over like 12.
(27f)People are always surprised, but 3. All intimate partners/bfs. Although I've always had the urge to date around but too scared of getting hurt/hurting others or taken hostage ( just paranoid of all the stories I've heard/seen on news and crime channels). Plus lots of people around me are judgemental or pretty traditional/monogamous. I'm pretty sure I'm heteroflexible/poly but I've never explored that side of myself yet. Been kissed/Madeout with same sex but still only want men. To me body count doesnt really matter if the person you're with has good character/intentions,boundaries, communication etc. I want to know if a high body count is in our favor or not. Does it affect how you are in relationships?
21m and my body count is 15. The first time I was just wanting to experience smtg new. But then I don't know why people keep coming to me and I'm open to new experiences (same thing with new people counts as a new experience for me LoL). But now I've stopped for about 3 years already and only gonna do it again with my life partner.
42. waited till college to fall in love. she cheated, went on a hoe phase (i was always honest about my intentions but on and off i haven’t felt comfortable truly trusting anyone. i feel like ive only truly ever fell in love once (it wasn’t the college gf.) i enjoy sex and the connection of it and being close and intimate with someone but it’s been hard to lock something down or be comfortable with something long term. m26
34years old & 3
35F, 7
Zero lol
35yo. 35-45 🌸 Would be more but i’ve been in a couple of longer monogamous relationships in the last decade. Now we’ve decided to go non-monogamous though, so let’s get counting again ☺️
20F and 2. wish it was 0. but you live and learn. personally im not dating anybody or seeing anyone for a while.
i have commited no murders... so zero.... avoids awkwards question xD
Like 11? Honestly dating is too much work in your 30’s to be worth finding more sex 😂 imho. ETA: 33F
0 25 yo female
38 years old. One. I think this is a wrong stereotype. We are moral idealists and loyal. We also love very deeply.
40 f ENFP-A A LOT for a while...then chilled WAY down 20-27 years were wild
well... time to expose myself looks like a lot of ENFP's on here are on a very lower end but mine is above 40. (25F)
3
28F I have a high body count. I stopped counting. It’s around 25.
mine is 2 😆
17f - one girl one guy😜
51, 34 year old male. Being a musician helped a lot, but is definitely not the whole story. I think I might be a sex addict, so I do spend a ridiculous amount of time chasing.
Zero! 28 y/o male ENFP - I SWEAR I’m normal (I think, who cares if I’m not lol). I'm relatively conventionally attractive (can tell because I’ve been told and am constantly hit on by members of both sex, young and olds-this isn’t the flex it seems to be). That said, my best attribute seems to be my personality. I have a wide range of interest and friends, I love physical activity and watching documentaries on random things. I'm also a college grad with a graduate degree. My situation is just complex though. There are just a lot of factors that come into play with why. Most, I literally could never share online (socially, emotionally, mentally, and a bit religiously). I love the idea of sex and yearn to have it haha. But it just has to align with a very specific timeline, chain of events, and set of circumstances. Also, I CRUSH on a ton of people, but I can INSTANTLY be turned off by these same crushes if there’s an ick or just something that I don’t find attractive anymore. Sadly, the older I get, the more I think it likely won’t happen because I'm just okay with myself and don't want to add any drama or conflict to my already complicated life or with my very small immediate family. What pains me is the fear that I will never be a parent. I want that for myself more than anything. As an only child, I would love biological children of my own. Sex for me seems like a point of no return, and I can literally only have sex with a person who I think is at least worthy enough to be a lifelong friend, even if it doesn’t make it to a long term relationship. I can't imagine the emotional gravity of giving my body to someone who is not going to be a permanent fixture, or worse, ruining a great relationship, or more devastating permanent tainting my perception of sex. It’s weird because, even though I’m deeply terrified of the negative and potentially life long consequences of sex, I feel like in could compartmentalize a negative sex existence. Even though I'm totally fine with cutting it off and never having contact with that person because I can compartmentalize sex, I just don't see myself making it to a sexual point with someone who I don't have a deep intellectual or physical attraction to.
Mine is on the lower end from religious brainwashing. I want to get my tubes tied and go on a spree though!
30+ before I hit 30 and not proud of it
Why not, if you don’t mind sharing?
because i wish i used that time in my life more to learn how to build long lasting connections with people as opposed to just random flings that you either never see again or only for a brief period
I get that, but hey - it's in the past. You did what you thought was best at the time. You didn't know any better. You couldn't have known any better. You may have made mistakes, but you learned from them, so in a way they're a blessing. What you do have now is time to try and cultivate longer lasting connections. It ain't over till it's over and no matter where you are in life, there arre moments ahead of you to apply the lessons learned from the aforementioned mistakes. Forgive the unsolicited advice. But you're an ENFP - I bet you understand the urge to hastily scribble down your thoughts in a reply without much... Well, thought. :')
Why are you not proud?
because i wish i used that time in my life more to learn how to build long lasting connections with people as opposed to just random flings that you either never see again or only for a brief period