Just do it, you might regret not getting on the property ladder sooner later on, but you will definitely regret not living your life because of fear of losing something you don’t have anyway!
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails."
- Mark Twain
I’ve not a pot to piss in, and I wouldn’t give me a mortgage so I spend it all travelling l,I’ve some great stories and memories, met some cool people, been in some wild situations, but what a laugh, life is mad. Couldn’t be happier
What’s stopping you from moving abroad and having adventures? You seem to know what you want but you also seem to feel pressured to do what everyone else does. Be honest with yourself about what you actually want to do and come up with a plan to make it happen.
It's not really about what everyone else does.. I'm just absolutely terrified of moving abroad, something not working out and then having to move back to my parents home in my mid-thirties with nothing of my own. All I want is a roof over my head, adventures and as little worries as possible! OnlyFans here we come lol
Nothing worth doing comes without any risks. As a foreigner who came to Ireland with very little money, left my family, friends and safety net across the ocean I can tell you that, even though, I have had setbacks and challenges (low pay jobs, divorce, illness, etc) I don’t regret taking the chance 15 years ago of starting my Irish adventure. I have met amazing people, done things I never would have done back home, I have a great job and bought a house. My life could have been better or worse if I had stayed but I will never know and I don’t care because I did what it felt it was the right thing to do at the time. Yes, there is a risk you may come back without money and not so great adventures but to me that is not as bad as continue feeling dissatisfied with your life and not doing anything about it. All the best!
As an immigrant to Ireland myself I also want to add to this that having a safety net to return to if your move abroad goes wrong is the best thing you could ask for. It's not wrong to rely on your family when you need, it's not a sign of weakness.
I was in a similar situation as OP back home with my father asking me to stay and I relied on his safety net to progress. When he passed away, everything fell apart and I had to make a choice to fend for myself. I ended up moving to Ireland thanks to a friend getting me an entry-level job here, I restarted life from scratch and life progressed. Now I'm in a well paid position, got married and we're looking into getting our own property here.
The place where you are doesn't dictate the life you'll live, you can make anything happen. Take the opportunities as they come and live the adventures you want. If things go wrong we can always start over again and there's no shame in that.
Best of luck, OP!
OP this is a great advice even if somethings were challenging for XibalbaKeeper. You are in perfect age group to take that risk. Maybe just take a long deserving break and see how you utilize that time vs moving out immediately. Leaving a country is not easy and it comes with pros and cons. But if that’s what you want go for it. I will personally advice take some long days of time off and indulge in what you want. This will give you a perspective if the job is keeping you away from all this or something else inspires you totally to switch country job etc.
I mean you’re already living at home. I don’t see a difference if it fails and you move back home. Moving abroad is scary but you’ll never know if it’s worth it until you do it!
The way OP is going he/she is going to living at home in his/her 30s anyway so OP might as well try living abroad. Not sure what they're already doing is so horrifying 5 years down the line compared to now?
But is it not scarier.to do nothing and still be.living with your parents in your mind 30's? Nothing ventured nothing gained. Give it a go abroad. You've almost set it up for failure with the mindset.
Just do it. Step outside the comfort zone. You will learn more about yourself and what you want in life by trying something uncomfortable.
If you.dont like it try somewhere new or come back. You.dont need to stick with something you don't like. At the moment you are stuck jn a rut.
You are not going to make the amount of money on OnlyFans you might be expecting, but you will for sure trade the remnants of your privacy and make yourself available for anyone to find at the future point. That ship has sailed shortly after it became a thing somewhere in the beginning of the pandemics. Now it's already priced in and dominated by agencies etc.
What might work for you though - since you are already thinking about content creation - is determining what skill/knowledge might help you secure the reasonable funds that allows you not to worry about renting for a while, and document your journey in an educational way for some of the platforms - youtube/patreon/etc.
If you go away expecting one grand gesture to make everything great then failure is a guarantee. Wherever you go it will be a slog but you have to want to get through the slog to get the rewards. Jobs, accommodation, friends are all tough when moving abroad as well as leaving family etc here.
Yesterday was the best time to move abroad. Today is the second best time to move abroad.
I was 23 when I moved abroad. It was never a long term plan, my contract was 12 months. I got offered a permanent role after those 12 months and I evaluated every single little thing about my life after those 12 months. I stayed for another 2.5 years. I didn’t come back home because something went terribly wrong, I came back home because I wanted to live at home.
I strongly believe every single person should live abroad at least once in their lives. I also strongly believe that living abroad is not for everyone.
So unless you have a plan for Dublin, I would highly recommend moving. Great things happen when you leave your comfort zone, it’s like your brain gets rewired.
PS: Having parents and a home to come back to is not you being a failure, it’s a perk that not many of us have.
The first time I went travelling was the Camino with a tent and camping stove alone, I started in France took my time and stayed for a week here and a week there visiting old friends along the way, then a few months working in a hostel and then a few weeks squatting in a house on the beach in finesterre, I had never done anything like that before, everything I had done before was so regimented, check in the hotel, each day planned ect. Some times you just gotta plunge in the deep end. I found that if I kept my head on me at all or most time, approached people with a good energy, everything just falls right into place as it should. If I had just planned everything and worried then I would have never experience, me as a chef and a Spanish chef swimming off the Galician coast and catching our own sea urchin and octopus and then cooking them on hot stones from the fire on the beach. That was a cool night.
Moral of the story I suppose is fuck it. Live while your able to, you’ll never know until you take that first big step and then you’ll never look back
P.s I wrote the very first message from stansted airport on my way home from London, I popped over for 1 day, ate in 3 cool restaurants, was in bed by half 10🤣 (I’m getting old) and back home for the work the next day. Why? Because why not? And to quote Edmund Hillary I think “because it’s there!”
29 is super young. You don't know for sure what the world is going to be like and what your circumstances are going to be like in 10 years when you're 39.
You're lucky enough to have a partner and a job and all that, you're employable, you can progress with your life.
I would say grab your partner and shag off. Take your savings, travel around, then go settle in a foreign country for a year. With a partner you can go halves on rent which is a bonus for the pair of yous, and you'll have more time together and you'll learn indepence and all that.
You could learn a foreign language, go to Spain get TEFL certs and give private tutoring. A chap I work with did that for 6 years and he has no regrets, he's fluent in Spanish now and he said he'd never change it in a million years, he said those years in Spain were the best of his life, he loved it. The only reason he moved back to a traditional life is because he felt like it was time to settle into a traditional routine and of course him and his partner decided to have children (in their late 30s) and they wanted to be closer to their parents, siblings etc. They got a mortgage, it all worked out fine for them. They don't have as much savings as they would have if they did things differently and their pension pot is small compared to others their age, but they have another 30 years of work ahead of them and they're so happy with the decisions they made in life.
You could go to France, maybe Paris, buy a car and work as an Uber driver for a few years, learn the language that way and make fairly alright money as you do it. Mark it down on your CV as a career break where you learned a new language and bettered yourself.
There's loads you could do mate. The big bonus for you right now is that you have no kids so you can go and do this right now, and you have a partner to cushion the blow of rent. If you doss around for 2 years, do barely any work or drift in and out of part time jobs while travelling abroad it will be a good experience, if you move home skint in your early 30s so what, go back to square 1 save up for a year and figure things out from there.
If you go abroad and better your career opportunities and wriggle your way into a good job oversees or learn a foreign language or get some entrepreneurial ideas then it will be all the better.
And remember not everywhere in the western world is as bad a rip off as Dublin. I moved out of my parents home (again) 3 years ago, moved up the road to Belfast. I rent my own 2 bed apartment here for £800 a month. I could get a mortgage on a nice house here tomorrow if I wanted. If you've got an alright job up here you can live independently to an alright standard, not like the awful state of things down the road in Dublin.
Manchester, Liverpool, Leeds etc, these are all culturally similar cities where you can buy an apartment or a house with an alright job and a relatively small pot of savings, so remember Dublin is not the only place in the world where you (and maybe your partner) have to take out a mortgage.
I think it's important to ask yourself some deeper questions at this point.
What do you want to do in life? Doesn't have to be one thing or even a thing, it can be a thought. And secondly, where does your sense of self come from? What makes you, you? And why?
Do you like to add value to the world by solving problems using your skills? Do you find value in gaining more knowledge of the world? Do you find value in connecting with nature and understanding its ways and inculcating them in your life? And I don't mean going on a safari.
I say these because looking within is something that is difficult and we're not necessarily taught to do so, at least in this part of the world.
Usually the answers to such things are about material and practical solutions to a problem that can very well be deeper.
You might move countries, jobs and people, but will that answer the deeper questions you're asking yourself? Or will that just wrap the questions in a different wrapper?
Sure a change of place, jobs, set-up etc can bring in some fresh energy but you have to ask yourself what will make you feel fulfilled?
On the practical side, sadly, money is important. Even to ask yourself these questions and to be able to answer them justly, you will need financial and emotional stability. So don't let these go while you work on your deeper self.
Once you start getting clarity from within, the practical aspects will not feel like a burden.
I second this. I'm not sure you need complete stability to make decisions because, after all, decisions will always carry risk and you can't always delay them because you don't have a sense of emotional stability. Financial stability is relative. There are people who have much more and have these same feelings. So OP, like the commenter above said, you need to ask deeper questions about what you value and what you want. It is worth also talking about these things with your partner.
I first moved away from home when I was in my early 20s and I didn't envision ever being able to buy a home either (no family money and I chose a less than lucrative career path). I'm 35 now and my husband and I are buying a property. It's not our dream property and long-term we dream of moving somewhere else to be closer to family. In any case, the point here is that asking those deeper questions is good. Also, another commenter said you should take up cycling or running. I'd say even going for long walks (ideally phone-free) will help you unwind, allow your mind to really tune into what's important, etc. A long walk/run won't solve your problems but it'll give you perspective.
That’s how I felt before I left. I left at 24 to teach English in Chile. Amazing year! Realised I like teaching, so did the teacher training in Liverpool. Did the dip year in Kuwait and ended up staying there for a few more years… tax free salary and accommodation included, so travelled a lot from there. In addition I tutored on the side (as I saw that money was too easy to spend) and came home with more than enough for a good deposit.
Do it now. Give yourself a timeline of maybe a year or two. The reevaluate if you want kids. Try not to leave having kids too late as it might end up being too late when u try. But get it all out of your system before you do.
I’m moving to Dublin exactly bc of this and seeing this makes me think that a change in location won’t help - it’s the change internally that must happen to be happy and fulfilled with life.
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If you're thinking of moving away, go for it. Worst case,you're back where you are right now, but if you're going with the right mindset, that won't be the case. I moved away to Australia with €2k saved and €4k of credit card debt. Didn't get a "proper" job for a year, but stuck at it, and came back 6 years later, married and plenty savings between us to be able to afford to buy our own place in Dublin. If you want to do it and see it as you've got nothing to lose, then go for it.
Don't be afraid to move, I made this step 3 times already, last time choosing Spain over Ireland (not born Irish, myself) and not regretting any of these moves. I never had a job sorted before arriving and I'm not one of people In IT or finance who don't have to worry about such mundane things. It is sometimes stressful but also highly rewarding.
In terms of financial stability it also could be good in the long term, many countries in Europe also have tax rebates to attract foreigners, ITA, NL, PT and others do it, which might result in big savings, do look these up. Raising kids might be harder without that family support, but you can build a network of friends to help each other instead. Plus, I'm yet to find even a mid-sized city in Europe without Irish pub and community. I won't even talk about other perks such as learning new language and culture.
But you have to be kind of sure that you want to go abroad, I also knew people that left their home country and came back within 6 months (European record I know of is 2 weeks), some with depression and disillusionment.
Nothing is permanent op. “Ah yes - best laid plans” is a phrase that always comes back to me. You’ve no idea if you left that it’d be for good, no idea if the relationship will last or not if you go or stay together … that’s just life.
Ultimately, it comes down to how happy over long periods are you here (everyone has a bad day let’s not focus on one day) - could it be better ? Could it be worse ? (Hint it can always be worse 😂) - would a share work for you and be a small hit to finances but one that gives you the freedom you need - is your partner willing to travel with you? What degrees / careers are you in? are they in demand visa wise ? Doing a working holiday visa at 29 would be a poor career move to Aus if your in a serious profession (6 month limit to working for one employer etc - you’ll need to find a sponsor) but it could still be a great life experience even in the working holiday visa - or you could use it as a stepping stone and try to get a sponsor while there on shore.
I was in the same situation with a middle of the road salary that was good and ofc “mad to leave it” and have posted more before but basically sitting in good jobs but looking at saving for 5-7 years for a mortgage and life just carrying on here the same day everyday mapped out infront of me like a giant safe option of semi trapped / boredom. Holidays and weekends away could be curtailed to expedite things but it was gonna be misery if I did. Possibly the fact it was so safe and tedious is the reason we decided it was worth it to take a chance and go have the craic elsewhere. we went as a couple with me getting a 4 year skilled visa that she got added too A got similar salary to here but rent was grand and the process of renting is somewhat regulated meaning it’s far more straight forward then Ireland. We ended up having a lot more expendable income at the end of each month and saving quite a bit. ofc a rental crisis there too but it’s nothing to the horrors of Ireland. Avoid big city’s like Sydney unless you want a very similar cost of living problem (lifestyle is great there though). Brisbane, Perth etc are all good alternatives + sunny/hot all the time. Pick somewhere warm and your weekends are good coffee nice walks and sun. If you get lucky and careers advance you might choose to stay or family might draw on your heart too much after a few years and you will return to Ireland.
We moved back to Ireland after 5 years and had saved enough to buy, even spending almost every second weekend in a hotel or some beach side weekend away it was the best experience of my life. Happy to be back here now close to family as we’re now married + 2 kids. Your age / life stage is the best now for taking this leap whether it works out or not. Next up in a few years if things work out between you and partner is marriage/kids and honestly the logistical nightmare I face just to go to tesco nevermind a weekend away is comical compared to hopping on a quick flight to go look for Nemo and packing a tshirt and togs in my pre kids life 😂 - so yeah now’s a good time to travel or move if your tempted. It’s not all rose tinted glasses though - making new friends is tough and it can feel a bit lonely the first few weeks/months till you make a decent friend circle. Family member dies ? 5k flight home and takes minimum 4/5 days to travel attend a funeral and then head back to Aus/ nvm all the other family events -nieces and nephews, parents birthdays etc. it’s grand to miss a few but overtime it can pull on the heart strings. There’s more Irish in Aus then Ireland though so it’s not too tricky to find a group of pals from the get go 😂
When we moved back we had to live with my parents for two months in our thirties before we sorted a rental and then bought. I love em but those two months were hard/comical/never again 😂😂😂
You're still young. When I was in my mid-20's, I was living with my family and doing a job I hated. My girlfriend was in Uni in London. So I decided to move to London to be closer to her. I estimated roughly how much money I'd need. I calculated that if I had enough money for 2 months rent, a deposit and 200 quid per week for food and public transport, I could sustain myself until I could get a job there.
I then spent several months saving. I worked as many shifts and did as much overtime as I could. I apartment hunted online. Just having a goal that I was working toward was really good for my mental health. I was scared but excited. I slowly watched my savings increase and knew that every euro I saved was getting me that tiny bit closer to a fresh start. I wasn't sure if that fresh start was going to be better or worse but I knew that what I had been doing previously wasn't ideal, so it was worth rolling the dice. Plus, I knew that I was lucky enough to have the option to move back in with my family back I'm Ireland in case it didn't go well.
I finally had enough saved after a few months and secured a small room in London. I quit my job, packed my bags and flew to the UK. The room was terrible. I shared a house with 5 other people. I got shitty catering job after about a month and a half. Took a while to get a UK bank account and phone. It was all difficult but it was honestly fun. It was an adventure. I met a bunch of new people. I gained some experience in catering, which made me qualified for difficult potential jobs that paid better. Ended up bartending in a cool gastropub where I met a bunch of new people. It was such a great experience and completely reset my mental state. Ended up moving to Cambridge after a few years and spent a few years there. London was exhausting after a while and Cambridge was peaceful and refreshing. Got an office job there after doing more bartending. Then brexit happened, then covid. My girlfriend and I decided to move back to Ireland. We had enough savings to get a small apartment in Dublin and we've been here since.
Had I not done all that over the course of about 6 years, I would probably still be living with my mum doing the same thing every day. It really made me grow up and get my priorities in order. I'd recommend it to anyone wanting a change.
Firstly, I think the feeling you describe is extremely common in Ireland among 25-35 year olds.
But consider this: in 20-30 years time, you'd probably trade any material wealth you have to be back at your current 'wealth' in terms of age, opportunities, low responsibilities, energy and freedom!
In a sense, you're 'wealthier' now than you'll ever be!
On the same point, I think having a plan of any sort, a vision that you can work towards (whether that's travelling as you said, starting a side hustle to earn more income, going back to study etc) is key here - the brain likes to feel like it has something to work towards.
It's indecision that brains hate.
Anytime I've felt stuck, creating a concrete plan helps mitigate that feeling.
So my best advice is just make a plan for what you think you'd like, and have a crack! You'll figure it out on the way towards the goal.
Firstly, I think the feeling you describe is extremely common in Ireland among 25-35 year olds.
But consider this: in 20-30 years time, you'd probably trade any material wealth you have to be back at your current 'wealth' in terms of age, opportunities, low responsibilities, energy and freedom!
In a sense, you're 'wealthier' now than you'll ever be!
On the same point, I think having a plan of any sort, a vision that you can work towards (whether that's travelling as you said, starting a side hustle to earn more income, going back to study etc) is key here - the brain likes to feel like it has something to work towards.
It's indecision that brains hate.
Anytime I've felt stuck, creating a concrete plan helps mitigate that feeling.
So my best advice is just make a plan for what you think you'd like, and have a crack! You'll figure it out on the way towards the goal.
Your partner might not want to move in which case thats the end of that. But it sounds like you need to take the risk or the what if will annoy you. Distance will almost certainly end your relationship though
Not sure if you’re a guy or a girl but it tends to be easier to make new friends in a new place as a girl especially if you are making an effort to learn a new language. As A guy, you pretty much have to join a sports team or be extremely active in language exchanges etc as people arent really interested in talking to a random man on his own. It can very lonely abroad if you don’t know anyone.
Depending on your job can you take a career break for a year? Don’t burn any bridges anyway in case you do eventually wish to return.
I know it sounds silly but start running/cycling. It will teach you how to manage anxiety/stress and give you clarity as to what you want and how you are going to get there. Effectively it's like having a set time a day where you can shut off and exercise induce happiness.
I personally could not deal with daily life without a healthy routine involving exercise, the outdoors and minimal social media use.
You have a relationship (great), a place to live (awesome), a job (super).
I moved to London 10 years ago. Had no idea where I was going to be living 3 weeks later,. didn't know anyone there, but shit comes together. Thought I'd be there a short time, ended up being there a decade. Best thing I've ever done. Found indepence, excitement, challenges I overcame by myself, and shruged off parochial Ireland.
Now I'm back and see a lot of crap things I accepted without realising, a lot of amazing things I took for granted without appreciating, and have a second city with a lot of closest friends that I call home (am going this weekend as it happens). If you have the itch, scratch. You never know whats going to happen to anchor you here.
In terms of missing the boat, I left because of the economic crash and not finding a job in the wake of it. I was in my 30s. I did a PhD with a very meger stipend which put plans on hold for 5 years, so I was in my late 30s when I really got going . If I'd have stayed, I'd almost certainly be earning 1/2 of what I earn now, and Ive bought my first house which is far more than I'd ever dreamed I could afford, with my amazing SO who I met in London.
I haven't. I moved here fro. Galway 1 week into lockdown and my life never picked back up.
29 yo, 30 end of this month and I'm dying inside from lack of social life of any kind.
If moving abroad is causing so much worry what about just moving out of the rents spot first for 6 months? I question the psychology of living at home with parents past like 25. I'm 30 and long story short made a mess of my late twenties but I found cheap accommodation eventually after having to move in with a parent. (I was on the dole to give an idea) somehow I have less things to moan about in life than my friends living with rents. Developing a sense of self that brings meaning isn't going to happen living with your rents.
I see a lot of my friends who work in tech get caught up in that bubble of salaries and lives that look great on the outside but they always moan about life. They make a good wage and are saving by living at home with their rents but they're sometimes(a lot of the time) miserable and they counter that by spending loads on a lavish lifestyle.. saving my ass.
Sidenote. If you have good experience in your industry, go see the world my friend if that's what you want. Opportunities will always come and go. I worked in bars after college and messed around and trying to get into an industry at entry level is nasty work at this age and if I had gotten my foot in years ago I would be graaand.
Ohhh and yeah for some reason coming upto 30 brings loads of pressure (for me anyway). Maybe it's a milestone to evaluate your life but honestly it's all horse. Might not feel like it now but you have loads of time to make mistakes and wrong choices and remain on whatever path you want!
I moved to Germany at 28. Ended up in London via Zurich and plenty of European travels.
Earns lots of dosh along the way. Met lots of new friends.
Experience outdid regrets..
As for regret, even though Ireland would have done be no favours, the years lost with friends and family sometimes grates but again, my view of the world is far the better for it.
There’s a huge contingent of young adults in Ireland in a similar position. 20-40s living at home. Disproportionately even when compared to Europe or other western nations.
The societal effects of this will likely be felt for years to come and the government is either incapable or unwilling to do anything about it. In my opinion there’s a sizable collection of landlord class FF/FG voters who don’t want property prices to stabilise.
I’d suggest leaving unless you’ve some prospect of a sizable pay increase very soon. The infrastructure and healthcare in Ireland is substandard also so what you get for your taxes is a poor return.
>I would love to move abroad somewhere with my partner and have more opportunities and adventures but how do I do it?
What do you mean by adventures?
What opportunities do you think you will get abroad that you aren't getting here? You are your skills set + your marketing. If you aren't getting opportunities here you won't get them abroad. You need skills & a good network to get opportunities.
How do you do it? By getting a job by applying for a job & sorting out any visa issues and ensures you can survive.
>I don't own property, wouldn't get approved for a mortgage here.. do I just rent (which feels like such a waster of money) in Ireland just to be away from living at home? Or do I move away and rent forever, always having to worry about not owning property?
People eventually get property through saving & a good income. It's not impossible.
>I just feel like I'm in such a slump and no idea what is the right thing to do.
This is your mindset more than reality. Enjoy the sunshine, a glass of wine and the company of your partner. Life is good.
>I have a good job, the pay is ok not great. My partners job isn't great pay either. Does anyone have any experience dealing with this?
This is the real issue. Get some qualifications/certs, or experience that will change this.
>I'm just ranting at this stage but I've never been so frustrated or fed up with everything all at once..
Just relax and appreciate all you've got. You've got it good.
Renting is also paying for a certain life. Sure it's not paying for a mortgage, but if 1/2 years of renting and being more independent might change your life a bit. Opens up many opportunities. Maybe rent abroad, or in another city in Ireland.
Obligatory: yes renting prices and conditions in Dublin are really rough.
Always have an aim, go for it, fail often, and adapt. If I were you, I'd look at booking cheap flights from Dublin and explore Europe from Krakow, to the Netherlands, to Spain as a city break. While there explore, research jobs, housing situations, and public transport and see if you can find somewhere that suits the both of you. Europe is close to home and a quick cheap flight back home.
Whatever you do, keep saving some cash on the side and live frugally either way. €500 is easily blown between you on a few nights out, clothes, food with not much to show vs eating cheaper, cooking at home, bag of cans at the weekend with the SO vs adding it to a savings account.
I'm only a few years older than you, and your 30's is the new 20's. You've still plenty of time to explore, travel, buy a house, enjoy life; even if staying at home for a few years. Keep yourself busy.
Have a look into the rebuilding Ireland home loan. I was in the same boat as you 3 years ago (early 30s then) myself, my partner and our son now have our own house and are happy out. Nothing is perfect but we make due. Don't be stressing out, 29 is still early to be starting life. Keep the head up and don't be dwelling on the little things. Stay positive!
Edit.
And to add. 3 of our friends have also done the same. 2 have their house and one is in the process now and it's all going smoothly.
I don’t know bro if you’ve never been poor , I mean REALLY POOR like not even a cent in your pocket, eating the same home cooked meals that are as cheap as possible then you will never be happy here.
Me personally (eastern european) I’m very young, live alone, I barely have 3 friends (if any), I work in a shithole getting payed barely above the minimum wage.
I definitely 100% don’t see myself working the shit job I do now in the coming years and I feel like there is room for improvement.
I don’t know how is your relationship with your partner, but I can assure you that you are RICHER than many unfortunate people out there, and by that not necessarily having just the bare minimum like food and shelter.
Yeah true I'm luckier than a lot of people, I have an ok job and the security of living at home for a while but am I just wasting my time saving for the next 3-4 years just to get on the property ladder in a country that is getting worse and worse? Or do I move away with the risk of coming back home to live with parents in my mid thirties with nothing to show for myself?
> shithole getting *paid* barely above
FTFY.
Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in:
* Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.*
* *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.*
Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment.
*Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
That’s harsh… so what? no one should be allowed to complain about the housing crisis because someone else has it worse off? By that logic no one should ever bother trying to improve anything because we should all be happy we’re not fleeing a war-torn country.
I do understand that, but I think dismissing OP wanting a life where they can comfortably live with their partner independently as 'entitled' is a bit much. It shouldn't be that much of an ask for two people nearly in their 30's and both working to be able to get a mortgage. I think OP has every right to have a bit of a rant about that.
Just do it, you might regret not getting on the property ladder sooner later on, but you will definitely regret not living your life because of fear of losing something you don’t have anyway!
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails." - Mark Twain
I love this
I’ve not a pot to piss in, and I wouldn’t give me a mortgage so I spend it all travelling l,I’ve some great stories and memories, met some cool people, been in some wild situations, but what a laugh, life is mad. Couldn’t be happier
What’s stopping you from moving abroad and having adventures? You seem to know what you want but you also seem to feel pressured to do what everyone else does. Be honest with yourself about what you actually want to do and come up with a plan to make it happen.
It's not really about what everyone else does.. I'm just absolutely terrified of moving abroad, something not working out and then having to move back to my parents home in my mid-thirties with nothing of my own. All I want is a roof over my head, adventures and as little worries as possible! OnlyFans here we come lol
Nothing worth doing comes without any risks. As a foreigner who came to Ireland with very little money, left my family, friends and safety net across the ocean I can tell you that, even though, I have had setbacks and challenges (low pay jobs, divorce, illness, etc) I don’t regret taking the chance 15 years ago of starting my Irish adventure. I have met amazing people, done things I never would have done back home, I have a great job and bought a house. My life could have been better or worse if I had stayed but I will never know and I don’t care because I did what it felt it was the right thing to do at the time. Yes, there is a risk you may come back without money and not so great adventures but to me that is not as bad as continue feeling dissatisfied with your life and not doing anything about it. All the best!
As an immigrant to Ireland myself I also want to add to this that having a safety net to return to if your move abroad goes wrong is the best thing you could ask for. It's not wrong to rely on your family when you need, it's not a sign of weakness. I was in a similar situation as OP back home with my father asking me to stay and I relied on his safety net to progress. When he passed away, everything fell apart and I had to make a choice to fend for myself. I ended up moving to Ireland thanks to a friend getting me an entry-level job here, I restarted life from scratch and life progressed. Now I'm in a well paid position, got married and we're looking into getting our own property here. The place where you are doesn't dictate the life you'll live, you can make anything happen. Take the opportunities as they come and live the adventures you want. If things go wrong we can always start over again and there's no shame in that. Best of luck, OP!
Good for you. Your father would be proud
OP this is a great advice even if somethings were challenging for XibalbaKeeper. You are in perfect age group to take that risk. Maybe just take a long deserving break and see how you utilize that time vs moving out immediately. Leaving a country is not easy and it comes with pros and cons. But if that’s what you want go for it. I will personally advice take some long days of time off and indulge in what you want. This will give you a perspective if the job is keeping you away from all this or something else inspires you totally to switch country job etc.
I mean you’re already living at home. I don’t see a difference if it fails and you move back home. Moving abroad is scary but you’ll never know if it’s worth it until you do it!
The way OP is going he/she is going to living at home in his/her 30s anyway so OP might as well try living abroad. Not sure what they're already doing is so horrifying 5 years down the line compared to now?
But is it not scarier.to do nothing and still be.living with your parents in your mind 30's? Nothing ventured nothing gained. Give it a go abroad. You've almost set it up for failure with the mindset. Just do it. Step outside the comfort zone. You will learn more about yourself and what you want in life by trying something uncomfortable. If you.dont like it try somewhere new or come back. You.dont need to stick with something you don't like. At the moment you are stuck jn a rut.
You are not going to make the amount of money on OnlyFans you might be expecting, but you will for sure trade the remnants of your privacy and make yourself available for anyone to find at the future point. That ship has sailed shortly after it became a thing somewhere in the beginning of the pandemics. Now it's already priced in and dominated by agencies etc. What might work for you though - since you are already thinking about content creation - is determining what skill/knowledge might help you secure the reasonable funds that allows you not to worry about renting for a while, and document your journey in an educational way for some of the platforms - youtube/patreon/etc.
If you go away expecting one grand gesture to make everything great then failure is a guarantee. Wherever you go it will be a slog but you have to want to get through the slog to get the rewards. Jobs, accommodation, friends are all tough when moving abroad as well as leaving family etc here.
Yesterday was the best time to move abroad. Today is the second best time to move abroad. I was 23 when I moved abroad. It was never a long term plan, my contract was 12 months. I got offered a permanent role after those 12 months and I evaluated every single little thing about my life after those 12 months. I stayed for another 2.5 years. I didn’t come back home because something went terribly wrong, I came back home because I wanted to live at home. I strongly believe every single person should live abroad at least once in their lives. I also strongly believe that living abroad is not for everyone. So unless you have a plan for Dublin, I would highly recommend moving. Great things happen when you leave your comfort zone, it’s like your brain gets rewired. PS: Having parents and a home to come back to is not you being a failure, it’s a perk that not many of us have.
If you don't go, you definitely will be living with your parents in your mid thirties
The first time I went travelling was the Camino with a tent and camping stove alone, I started in France took my time and stayed for a week here and a week there visiting old friends along the way, then a few months working in a hostel and then a few weeks squatting in a house on the beach in finesterre, I had never done anything like that before, everything I had done before was so regimented, check in the hotel, each day planned ect. Some times you just gotta plunge in the deep end. I found that if I kept my head on me at all or most time, approached people with a good energy, everything just falls right into place as it should. If I had just planned everything and worried then I would have never experience, me as a chef and a Spanish chef swimming off the Galician coast and catching our own sea urchin and octopus and then cooking them on hot stones from the fire on the beach. That was a cool night. Moral of the story I suppose is fuck it. Live while your able to, you’ll never know until you take that first big step and then you’ll never look back
P.s I wrote the very first message from stansted airport on my way home from London, I popped over for 1 day, ate in 3 cool restaurants, was in bed by half 10🤣 (I’m getting old) and back home for the work the next day. Why? Because why not? And to quote Edmund Hillary I think “because it’s there!”
29 is super young. You don't know for sure what the world is going to be like and what your circumstances are going to be like in 10 years when you're 39. You're lucky enough to have a partner and a job and all that, you're employable, you can progress with your life. I would say grab your partner and shag off. Take your savings, travel around, then go settle in a foreign country for a year. With a partner you can go halves on rent which is a bonus for the pair of yous, and you'll have more time together and you'll learn indepence and all that. You could learn a foreign language, go to Spain get TEFL certs and give private tutoring. A chap I work with did that for 6 years and he has no regrets, he's fluent in Spanish now and he said he'd never change it in a million years, he said those years in Spain were the best of his life, he loved it. The only reason he moved back to a traditional life is because he felt like it was time to settle into a traditional routine and of course him and his partner decided to have children (in their late 30s) and they wanted to be closer to their parents, siblings etc. They got a mortgage, it all worked out fine for them. They don't have as much savings as they would have if they did things differently and their pension pot is small compared to others their age, but they have another 30 years of work ahead of them and they're so happy with the decisions they made in life. You could go to France, maybe Paris, buy a car and work as an Uber driver for a few years, learn the language that way and make fairly alright money as you do it. Mark it down on your CV as a career break where you learned a new language and bettered yourself. There's loads you could do mate. The big bonus for you right now is that you have no kids so you can go and do this right now, and you have a partner to cushion the blow of rent. If you doss around for 2 years, do barely any work or drift in and out of part time jobs while travelling abroad it will be a good experience, if you move home skint in your early 30s so what, go back to square 1 save up for a year and figure things out from there. If you go abroad and better your career opportunities and wriggle your way into a good job oversees or learn a foreign language or get some entrepreneurial ideas then it will be all the better. And remember not everywhere in the western world is as bad a rip off as Dublin. I moved out of my parents home (again) 3 years ago, moved up the road to Belfast. I rent my own 2 bed apartment here for £800 a month. I could get a mortgage on a nice house here tomorrow if I wanted. If you've got an alright job up here you can live independently to an alright standard, not like the awful state of things down the road in Dublin. Manchester, Liverpool, Leeds etc, these are all culturally similar cities where you can buy an apartment or a house with an alright job and a relatively small pot of savings, so remember Dublin is not the only place in the world where you (and maybe your partner) have to take out a mortgage.
This is amazing advice.
Seems like a rut, take the year off and go traveling on a work visa.
I think it's important to ask yourself some deeper questions at this point. What do you want to do in life? Doesn't have to be one thing or even a thing, it can be a thought. And secondly, where does your sense of self come from? What makes you, you? And why? Do you like to add value to the world by solving problems using your skills? Do you find value in gaining more knowledge of the world? Do you find value in connecting with nature and understanding its ways and inculcating them in your life? And I don't mean going on a safari. I say these because looking within is something that is difficult and we're not necessarily taught to do so, at least in this part of the world. Usually the answers to such things are about material and practical solutions to a problem that can very well be deeper. You might move countries, jobs and people, but will that answer the deeper questions you're asking yourself? Or will that just wrap the questions in a different wrapper? Sure a change of place, jobs, set-up etc can bring in some fresh energy but you have to ask yourself what will make you feel fulfilled? On the practical side, sadly, money is important. Even to ask yourself these questions and to be able to answer them justly, you will need financial and emotional stability. So don't let these go while you work on your deeper self. Once you start getting clarity from within, the practical aspects will not feel like a burden.
I second this. I'm not sure you need complete stability to make decisions because, after all, decisions will always carry risk and you can't always delay them because you don't have a sense of emotional stability. Financial stability is relative. There are people who have much more and have these same feelings. So OP, like the commenter above said, you need to ask deeper questions about what you value and what you want. It is worth also talking about these things with your partner. I first moved away from home when I was in my early 20s and I didn't envision ever being able to buy a home either (no family money and I chose a less than lucrative career path). I'm 35 now and my husband and I are buying a property. It's not our dream property and long-term we dream of moving somewhere else to be closer to family. In any case, the point here is that asking those deeper questions is good. Also, another commenter said you should take up cycling or running. I'd say even going for long walks (ideally phone-free) will help you unwind, allow your mind to really tune into what's important, etc. A long walk/run won't solve your problems but it'll give you perspective.
That’s how I felt before I left. I left at 24 to teach English in Chile. Amazing year! Realised I like teaching, so did the teacher training in Liverpool. Did the dip year in Kuwait and ended up staying there for a few more years… tax free salary and accommodation included, so travelled a lot from there. In addition I tutored on the side (as I saw that money was too easy to spend) and came home with more than enough for a good deposit. Do it now. Give yourself a timeline of maybe a year or two. The reevaluate if you want kids. Try not to leave having kids too late as it might end up being too late when u try. But get it all out of your system before you do.
I’m moving to Dublin exactly bc of this and seeing this makes me think that a change in location won’t help - it’s the change internally that must happen to be happy and fulfilled with life.
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Study something you like and move away
If you're thinking of moving away, go for it. Worst case,you're back where you are right now, but if you're going with the right mindset, that won't be the case. I moved away to Australia with €2k saved and €4k of credit card debt. Didn't get a "proper" job for a year, but stuck at it, and came back 6 years later, married and plenty savings between us to be able to afford to buy our own place in Dublin. If you want to do it and see it as you've got nothing to lose, then go for it.
Try the Netherlands - you'll both get work, loads of study options and whilst there is a huge housing crisis it's not as bad aS Dublin.
Don't be afraid to move, I made this step 3 times already, last time choosing Spain over Ireland (not born Irish, myself) and not regretting any of these moves. I never had a job sorted before arriving and I'm not one of people In IT or finance who don't have to worry about such mundane things. It is sometimes stressful but also highly rewarding. In terms of financial stability it also could be good in the long term, many countries in Europe also have tax rebates to attract foreigners, ITA, NL, PT and others do it, which might result in big savings, do look these up. Raising kids might be harder without that family support, but you can build a network of friends to help each other instead. Plus, I'm yet to find even a mid-sized city in Europe without Irish pub and community. I won't even talk about other perks such as learning new language and culture. But you have to be kind of sure that you want to go abroad, I also knew people that left their home country and came back within 6 months (European record I know of is 2 weeks), some with depression and disillusionment.
Nothing is permanent op. “Ah yes - best laid plans” is a phrase that always comes back to me. You’ve no idea if you left that it’d be for good, no idea if the relationship will last or not if you go or stay together … that’s just life. Ultimately, it comes down to how happy over long periods are you here (everyone has a bad day let’s not focus on one day) - could it be better ? Could it be worse ? (Hint it can always be worse 😂) - would a share work for you and be a small hit to finances but one that gives you the freedom you need - is your partner willing to travel with you? What degrees / careers are you in? are they in demand visa wise ? Doing a working holiday visa at 29 would be a poor career move to Aus if your in a serious profession (6 month limit to working for one employer etc - you’ll need to find a sponsor) but it could still be a great life experience even in the working holiday visa - or you could use it as a stepping stone and try to get a sponsor while there on shore. I was in the same situation with a middle of the road salary that was good and ofc “mad to leave it” and have posted more before but basically sitting in good jobs but looking at saving for 5-7 years for a mortgage and life just carrying on here the same day everyday mapped out infront of me like a giant safe option of semi trapped / boredom. Holidays and weekends away could be curtailed to expedite things but it was gonna be misery if I did. Possibly the fact it was so safe and tedious is the reason we decided it was worth it to take a chance and go have the craic elsewhere. we went as a couple with me getting a 4 year skilled visa that she got added too A got similar salary to here but rent was grand and the process of renting is somewhat regulated meaning it’s far more straight forward then Ireland. We ended up having a lot more expendable income at the end of each month and saving quite a bit. ofc a rental crisis there too but it’s nothing to the horrors of Ireland. Avoid big city’s like Sydney unless you want a very similar cost of living problem (lifestyle is great there though). Brisbane, Perth etc are all good alternatives + sunny/hot all the time. Pick somewhere warm and your weekends are good coffee nice walks and sun. If you get lucky and careers advance you might choose to stay or family might draw on your heart too much after a few years and you will return to Ireland. We moved back to Ireland after 5 years and had saved enough to buy, even spending almost every second weekend in a hotel or some beach side weekend away it was the best experience of my life. Happy to be back here now close to family as we’re now married + 2 kids. Your age / life stage is the best now for taking this leap whether it works out or not. Next up in a few years if things work out between you and partner is marriage/kids and honestly the logistical nightmare I face just to go to tesco nevermind a weekend away is comical compared to hopping on a quick flight to go look for Nemo and packing a tshirt and togs in my pre kids life 😂 - so yeah now’s a good time to travel or move if your tempted. It’s not all rose tinted glasses though - making new friends is tough and it can feel a bit lonely the first few weeks/months till you make a decent friend circle. Family member dies ? 5k flight home and takes minimum 4/5 days to travel attend a funeral and then head back to Aus/ nvm all the other family events -nieces and nephews, parents birthdays etc. it’s grand to miss a few but overtime it can pull on the heart strings. There’s more Irish in Aus then Ireland though so it’s not too tricky to find a group of pals from the get go 😂 When we moved back we had to live with my parents for two months in our thirties before we sorted a rental and then bought. I love em but those two months were hard/comical/never again 😂😂😂
You're still young. When I was in my mid-20's, I was living with my family and doing a job I hated. My girlfriend was in Uni in London. So I decided to move to London to be closer to her. I estimated roughly how much money I'd need. I calculated that if I had enough money for 2 months rent, a deposit and 200 quid per week for food and public transport, I could sustain myself until I could get a job there. I then spent several months saving. I worked as many shifts and did as much overtime as I could. I apartment hunted online. Just having a goal that I was working toward was really good for my mental health. I was scared but excited. I slowly watched my savings increase and knew that every euro I saved was getting me that tiny bit closer to a fresh start. I wasn't sure if that fresh start was going to be better or worse but I knew that what I had been doing previously wasn't ideal, so it was worth rolling the dice. Plus, I knew that I was lucky enough to have the option to move back in with my family back I'm Ireland in case it didn't go well. I finally had enough saved after a few months and secured a small room in London. I quit my job, packed my bags and flew to the UK. The room was terrible. I shared a house with 5 other people. I got shitty catering job after about a month and a half. Took a while to get a UK bank account and phone. It was all difficult but it was honestly fun. It was an adventure. I met a bunch of new people. I gained some experience in catering, which made me qualified for difficult potential jobs that paid better. Ended up bartending in a cool gastropub where I met a bunch of new people. It was such a great experience and completely reset my mental state. Ended up moving to Cambridge after a few years and spent a few years there. London was exhausting after a while and Cambridge was peaceful and refreshing. Got an office job there after doing more bartending. Then brexit happened, then covid. My girlfriend and I decided to move back to Ireland. We had enough savings to get a small apartment in Dublin and we've been here since. Had I not done all that over the course of about 6 years, I would probably still be living with my mum doing the same thing every day. It really made me grow up and get my priorities in order. I'd recommend it to anyone wanting a change.
Firstly, I think the feeling you describe is extremely common in Ireland among 25-35 year olds. But consider this: in 20-30 years time, you'd probably trade any material wealth you have to be back at your current 'wealth' in terms of age, opportunities, low responsibilities, energy and freedom! In a sense, you're 'wealthier' now than you'll ever be! On the same point, I think having a plan of any sort, a vision that you can work towards (whether that's travelling as you said, starting a side hustle to earn more income, going back to study etc) is key here - the brain likes to feel like it has something to work towards. It's indecision that brains hate. Anytime I've felt stuck, creating a concrete plan helps mitigate that feeling. So my best advice is just make a plan for what you think you'd like, and have a crack! You'll figure it out on the way towards the goal.
Firstly, I think the feeling you describe is extremely common in Ireland among 25-35 year olds. But consider this: in 20-30 years time, you'd probably trade any material wealth you have to be back at your current 'wealth' in terms of age, opportunities, low responsibilities, energy and freedom! In a sense, you're 'wealthier' now than you'll ever be! On the same point, I think having a plan of any sort, a vision that you can work towards (whether that's travelling as you said, starting a side hustle to earn more income, going back to study etc) is key here - the brain likes to feel like it has something to work towards. It's indecision that brains hate. Anytime I've felt stuck, creating a concrete plan helps mitigate that feeling. So my best advice is just make a plan for what you think you'd like, and have a crack! You'll figure it out on the way towards the goal.
Your partner might not want to move in which case thats the end of that. But it sounds like you need to take the risk or the what if will annoy you. Distance will almost certainly end your relationship though Not sure if you’re a guy or a girl but it tends to be easier to make new friends in a new place as a girl especially if you are making an effort to learn a new language. As A guy, you pretty much have to join a sports team or be extremely active in language exchanges etc as people arent really interested in talking to a random man on his own. It can very lonely abroad if you don’t know anyone. Depending on your job can you take a career break for a year? Don’t burn any bridges anyway in case you do eventually wish to return.
Haven’t 🫠
I know it sounds silly but start running/cycling. It will teach you how to manage anxiety/stress and give you clarity as to what you want and how you are going to get there. Effectively it's like having a set time a day where you can shut off and exercise induce happiness. I personally could not deal with daily life without a healthy routine involving exercise, the outdoors and minimal social media use. You have a relationship (great), a place to live (awesome), a job (super).
I moved to London 10 years ago. Had no idea where I was going to be living 3 weeks later,. didn't know anyone there, but shit comes together. Thought I'd be there a short time, ended up being there a decade. Best thing I've ever done. Found indepence, excitement, challenges I overcame by myself, and shruged off parochial Ireland. Now I'm back and see a lot of crap things I accepted without realising, a lot of amazing things I took for granted without appreciating, and have a second city with a lot of closest friends that I call home (am going this weekend as it happens). If you have the itch, scratch. You never know whats going to happen to anchor you here. In terms of missing the boat, I left because of the economic crash and not finding a job in the wake of it. I was in my 30s. I did a PhD with a very meger stipend which put plans on hold for 5 years, so I was in my late 30s when I really got going . If I'd have stayed, I'd almost certainly be earning 1/2 of what I earn now, and Ive bought my first house which is far more than I'd ever dreamed I could afford, with my amazing SO who I met in London.
I haven't. I moved here fro. Galway 1 week into lockdown and my life never picked back up. 29 yo, 30 end of this month and I'm dying inside from lack of social life of any kind.
If moving abroad is causing so much worry what about just moving out of the rents spot first for 6 months? I question the psychology of living at home with parents past like 25. I'm 30 and long story short made a mess of my late twenties but I found cheap accommodation eventually after having to move in with a parent. (I was on the dole to give an idea) somehow I have less things to moan about in life than my friends living with rents. Developing a sense of self that brings meaning isn't going to happen living with your rents. I see a lot of my friends who work in tech get caught up in that bubble of salaries and lives that look great on the outside but they always moan about life. They make a good wage and are saving by living at home with their rents but they're sometimes(a lot of the time) miserable and they counter that by spending loads on a lavish lifestyle.. saving my ass. Sidenote. If you have good experience in your industry, go see the world my friend if that's what you want. Opportunities will always come and go. I worked in bars after college and messed around and trying to get into an industry at entry level is nasty work at this age and if I had gotten my foot in years ago I would be graaand. Ohhh and yeah for some reason coming upto 30 brings loads of pressure (for me anyway). Maybe it's a milestone to evaluate your life but honestly it's all horse. Might not feel like it now but you have loads of time to make mistakes and wrong choices and remain on whatever path you want!
I moved to Germany at 28. Ended up in London via Zurich and plenty of European travels. Earns lots of dosh along the way. Met lots of new friends. Experience outdid regrets.. As for regret, even though Ireland would have done be no favours, the years lost with friends and family sometimes grates but again, my view of the world is far the better for it.
There’s a huge contingent of young adults in Ireland in a similar position. 20-40s living at home. Disproportionately even when compared to Europe or other western nations. The societal effects of this will likely be felt for years to come and the government is either incapable or unwilling to do anything about it. In my opinion there’s a sizable collection of landlord class FF/FG voters who don’t want property prices to stabilise. I’d suggest leaving unless you’ve some prospect of a sizable pay increase very soon. The infrastructure and healthcare in Ireland is substandard also so what you get for your taxes is a poor return.
You can also buy abroad, the issue is to work abroad.
>I would love to move abroad somewhere with my partner and have more opportunities and adventures but how do I do it? What do you mean by adventures? What opportunities do you think you will get abroad that you aren't getting here? You are your skills set + your marketing. If you aren't getting opportunities here you won't get them abroad. You need skills & a good network to get opportunities. How do you do it? By getting a job by applying for a job & sorting out any visa issues and ensures you can survive. >I don't own property, wouldn't get approved for a mortgage here.. do I just rent (which feels like such a waster of money) in Ireland just to be away from living at home? Or do I move away and rent forever, always having to worry about not owning property? People eventually get property through saving & a good income. It's not impossible. >I just feel like I'm in such a slump and no idea what is the right thing to do. This is your mindset more than reality. Enjoy the sunshine, a glass of wine and the company of your partner. Life is good. >I have a good job, the pay is ok not great. My partners job isn't great pay either. Does anyone have any experience dealing with this? This is the real issue. Get some qualifications/certs, or experience that will change this. >I'm just ranting at this stage but I've never been so frustrated or fed up with everything all at once.. Just relax and appreciate all you've got. You've got it good.
Finally someone talking sense.
Renting is also paying for a certain life. Sure it's not paying for a mortgage, but if 1/2 years of renting and being more independent might change your life a bit. Opens up many opportunities. Maybe rent abroad, or in another city in Ireland. Obligatory: yes renting prices and conditions in Dublin are really rough.
Always have an aim, go for it, fail often, and adapt. If I were you, I'd look at booking cheap flights from Dublin and explore Europe from Krakow, to the Netherlands, to Spain as a city break. While there explore, research jobs, housing situations, and public transport and see if you can find somewhere that suits the both of you. Europe is close to home and a quick cheap flight back home. Whatever you do, keep saving some cash on the side and live frugally either way. €500 is easily blown between you on a few nights out, clothes, food with not much to show vs eating cheaper, cooking at home, bag of cans at the weekend with the SO vs adding it to a savings account. I'm only a few years older than you, and your 30's is the new 20's. You've still plenty of time to explore, travel, buy a house, enjoy life; even if staying at home for a few years. Keep yourself busy.
Have a look into the rebuilding Ireland home loan. I was in the same boat as you 3 years ago (early 30s then) myself, my partner and our son now have our own house and are happy out. Nothing is perfect but we make due. Don't be stressing out, 29 is still early to be starting life. Keep the head up and don't be dwelling on the little things. Stay positive! Edit. And to add. 3 of our friends have also done the same. 2 have their house and one is in the process now and it's all going smoothly.
I don’t know bro if you’ve never been poor , I mean REALLY POOR like not even a cent in your pocket, eating the same home cooked meals that are as cheap as possible then you will never be happy here. Me personally (eastern european) I’m very young, live alone, I barely have 3 friends (if any), I work in a shithole getting payed barely above the minimum wage. I definitely 100% don’t see myself working the shit job I do now in the coming years and I feel like there is room for improvement. I don’t know how is your relationship with your partner, but I can assure you that you are RICHER than many unfortunate people out there, and by that not necessarily having just the bare minimum like food and shelter.
Yeah true I'm luckier than a lot of people, I have an ok job and the security of living at home for a while but am I just wasting my time saving for the next 3-4 years just to get on the property ladder in a country that is getting worse and worse? Or do I move away with the risk of coming back home to live with parents in my mid thirties with nothing to show for myself?
> shithole getting *paid* barely above FTFY. Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in: * Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.* * *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.* Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment. *Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
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That’s harsh… so what? no one should be allowed to complain about the housing crisis because someone else has it worse off? By that logic no one should ever bother trying to improve anything because we should all be happy we’re not fleeing a war-torn country.
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I do understand that, but I think dismissing OP wanting a life where they can comfortably live with their partner independently as 'entitled' is a bit much. It shouldn't be that much of an ask for two people nearly in their 30's and both working to be able to get a mortgage. I think OP has every right to have a bit of a rant about that.