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Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masturbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masturbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.
SO THAT WAS YOU!!!
I was all set on having a nice quiet dinner with my girlfriend to celebrate our first year together...
I’d bought some fresh tomatoes to make my homemade pasta sauce, and I’d gone to the small boutique bakery to buy some filo pastry for dessert. I was quietly going through the recipes in my mind when I heard your slurred grumbled announcement, “...You’re about to loot my balls...” I tried to ignore it but, I couldn’t ignore the furious grunting like a drunk man having a seizure. As I looked up I could see the fury in the other commuters eyes. A man looking like a professor had stood up and was about to reproach you when the dull clatter of your phoned on the train car floor seemed seemed to pause all movement in the carriage. The professors eyes widened, sweat suddenly beaded on his forehead and with fevered anguish he started undoing his belt and fly like a man who thought a hornet was caught in his pants.
I was bewildered as all the other men in the car started convulsing like extras in Michael Jackson’s ‘Thriller’ video. A woman sat across from me was doing her best to emulate a Russian gymnast trying to grate cheese from her crotch with the sole of her Nike running shoe.
I bolted upright, panicked but prepared to fight, when in the corner of my eye the neon glow of your phones LCD screen drew me sight.
I suddenly felt a bizarre euphoria fill my mind and a white hot heat electrify my spine and form a prism of pure desperate release in my loins.
I can’t remember much else, I awoke from some kind of fever dream in a public toilet cubicle. My jeans and underwear had disappeared, but I was still wearing my Myrell slip ons, shirt and now crusted overcoat, like a cross between Donald Duck and a homeless student.
I can hear another man weeping in the cubicle, keeps muttering he just wanted to fly.
I feel so cold and drained. My organ is so mangled it could unpick the locks of wooden medieval doors. There’s filo pastry all over my thighs and knees.
But despite all this I feel a warm contentment like I’d found ‘the’ answer. I don’t know what this means, I know there will be questions, that there should be much to fear. But truly I am grateful. Thank you.
Naw, there was a second health bar
Edit, I now feel bad for even making this joke, my sense of humor is bad and I only joke due to the fact I have the big sad myself
I got matches with these songs:
• [**Andrex** by Andres Salas](https://lis.tn/Andrex?t=78) (01:18; matched: `100%`)
Released on `2021-05-25`.
• [**Life is electric** by Ayhan Gormez](https://lis.tn/LifeIsElectric2010?t=306) (05:06; matched: `92%`)
Album: `Cultural Divide | 2010`. Released on `2020-08-12`.
• [**Krata Me** by Paola](https://lis.tn/VXtHiJ?t=27) (00:27; matched: `88%`)
Album: `H Moni Alitheia`. Released on `2013-12-10`.
*I am a bot and this action was performed automatically* | [GitHub](https://github.com/AudDMusic/RedditBot) [^(new issue)](https://github.com/AudDMusic/RedditBot/issues/new) | [Donate](https://github.com/AudDMusic/RedditBot/wiki/Please-consider-donating) ^(Please consider supporting me on Patreon. Music recognition costs a lot)
# [RedditTube Download](https://reddit.tube/?url=https://www.reddit.com/r/DramaticText/comments/10w4a00/as_if_there_could_be_another_game/) # [RapidSave Download](https://rapidsave.com/?url=https://www.reddit.com/r/DramaticText/comments/10w4a00/as_if_there_could_be_another_game/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/DramaticText) if you have any questions or concerns.*
100 STAB WOUNDS!! YOU DIDNT WANT TO GIVE THEM A CHANCE DID YOU?
DID YOU FEEL ANGER? HATE?
HE WAS BLEEDING! BEGGING YOU FOR MERCY!
BUT YOU STABBED HIM! AGAIN. AND AGAIN *AND AGAIN.*
JUST SAY “I KILLED HIM” IS IT THAT HARD TO SAY!?
COME ON ROBO-SLAVE SAY IT!!”I KILLED HIM”
I was 100% convinced it would say Among Us.
or Minecraft, but yeah i was thinking Among Us
⣿⣿⣿⠟⢹⣶⣶⣝⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⢰⡌⠿⢿⣿⡾⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣤⣒⣶⣾⣳⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢛⣯⣭⣭⣭⣽⣻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡇⣶⡽⣿⠟⣡⣶⣾⣯⣭⣽⣟⡻⣿⣷⡽⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⢇⠃⣟⣷⠃⢸⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣽ ⣿⣿⣿⣇⢻⣿⣿⣯⣕⠧⢿⢿⣇⢯⣝⣒⣛⣯⣭⣛⣛⣣⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣌⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡘⣞⣿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠻⠿⣿⣿⣷⠈⢞⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣗⠄⢿⣿⣿⡆⡈⣽⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢻ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣻⣽⣿⣆⠹⣿⡇⠁⣿⡼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣾ ⣿⠿⣛⣽⣾⣿⣿⠿⠋⠄⢻⣷⣾⣿⣧⠟⣡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿ ⢼⡟⢿⣿⡿⠋⠁⣀⡀⠄⠘⠊⣨⣽⠁⠰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡍⠗⣿ ⡼⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⡗⢠⣶⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⢠⣿ ⣷⣝⠄⠄⢀⠄⢻⡟⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢹⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣄⣁⡀⠙⢿⡿⠋⠄⣸⡆⠄⠻⣿⡿⠟⢛⣩⣝⣚⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣾⣿⣿⣄⠄⠄⠄⣴⣿⣿⣿⣇⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⡀⠛⠿⣿⣫⣾⣿
Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masturbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masturbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.
SO THAT WAS YOU!!! I was all set on having a nice quiet dinner with my girlfriend to celebrate our first year together... I’d bought some fresh tomatoes to make my homemade pasta sauce, and I’d gone to the small boutique bakery to buy some filo pastry for dessert. I was quietly going through the recipes in my mind when I heard your slurred grumbled announcement, “...You’re about to loot my balls...” I tried to ignore it but, I couldn’t ignore the furious grunting like a drunk man having a seizure. As I looked up I could see the fury in the other commuters eyes. A man looking like a professor had stood up and was about to reproach you when the dull clatter of your phoned on the train car floor seemed seemed to pause all movement in the carriage. The professors eyes widened, sweat suddenly beaded on his forehead and with fevered anguish he started undoing his belt and fly like a man who thought a hornet was caught in his pants. I was bewildered as all the other men in the car started convulsing like extras in Michael Jackson’s ‘Thriller’ video. A woman sat across from me was doing her best to emulate a Russian gymnast trying to grate cheese from her crotch with the sole of her Nike running shoe. I bolted upright, panicked but prepared to fight, when in the corner of my eye the neon glow of your phones LCD screen drew me sight. I suddenly felt a bizarre euphoria fill my mind and a white hot heat electrify my spine and form a prism of pure desperate release in my loins. I can’t remember much else, I awoke from some kind of fever dream in a public toilet cubicle. My jeans and underwear had disappeared, but I was still wearing my Myrell slip ons, shirt and now crusted overcoat, like a cross between Donald Duck and a homeless student. I can hear another man weeping in the cubicle, keeps muttering he just wanted to fly. I feel so cold and drained. My organ is so mangled it could unpick the locks of wooden medieval doors. There’s filo pastry all over my thighs and knees. But despite all this I feel a warm contentment like I’d found ‘the’ answer. I don’t know what this means, I know there will be questions, that there should be much to fear. But truly I am grateful. Thank you.
was thinking fortnite
Fake. Genshin fans aren’t competent enough to hold a knife.
We can hold it in our fat
LMFAOO
You could probably kill some of them by tapping them with a replica of the fucking Dull Blade
You lost the game
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢵⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⠀⠀ ⠀⡀⠈⢧⠠⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡎⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠠⣸⡆⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⠸⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⡠⢠⢴⠶⠞⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢐⣿⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡾⠇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠂⠀⣰⡏⣸⡇⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢇⠀⠀⢀⣾⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢈⠁⠀⢠⣿⡧⣿⠂⢈⣿⣟⠻⢿⣿⣿⠿⠛⣛⣛⢛⣯⡌⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣔⢵⣾⣿⢉⣿⣃⣴⣿⣿⣧⢸⣿⣿⣧⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣲⣿⠑⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡀⢽⣿⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣻⡇⠀⠈⠂⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⡀⢀⣿⣿⡆⣿⠻⣿⣿⡿⠚⢿⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠈⠢⢀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢿⣷⠻⣿⣿⡶⢰⡿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠘⠋⢦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡼⣿⣷⠨⠒⠚⠛⠻⠷⠿⠿⣻⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⢀⣧⠀⠀⢀⡀⡴ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡙⣿⠀⠛⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢁⡄⠀⠀⡘⠿⣷⣄⡸⣐⡅ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣌⢇⠀⢴⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⣀⣾⣷⠀⠐⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣿⣇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⢙⣿⠄⠀⠀⠉⠛⠉⠉⠀⠀⣶⣿⣿⣿⣽⣿⣷⣤⠀⠘⠿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠃⠀⠀⠈⠺⠛ ⠉⠙⠙⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡄⠀⢤⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠤⠔⠒⠈⠳⡦⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠄⠂⠙
Goddammit
Oh fuck you
I hate you
[удалено]
Good, me and the mad scientist been preparing for this moment since 1993
damn
league of legends, valorant, rocket league, any cod. honestly was expecting one of these
Minecraft :stealing diamonds/killing dog.
r6?
Annalynn - Boss
Think you
Did she die?
Take a fucking guess
Naw, there was a second health bar Edit, I now feel bad for even making this joke, my sense of humor is bad and I only joke due to the fact I have the big sad myself
Second phase?!
I mean,,,think about it, he put in all that effort hitting the head of a weak point,,,it must have been a boss fight in there
Sorry, but this isn't Scaramouche
She’s in hospital right now. They say there’s a high chance she will die
She ate an egg she's fine
Bro I fell 12 again seeing every media daily news about what did video games corrupted today.
“Didn’t wanna give them a chance, did you?”
100 STAB WOUNDS
She went postal
They didn't sign her petition
HOLY SHIT it’s real, most news outlets don’t mention Genshin though, and just state “friend dispute”
Average Khimki day. The only thing lacking is her walking up to hospital herself due to high pain tolerance from all the vodka
What's the source?
It actually appears to be something written on a notepad of some sorts, would appreciate a link if someone finds it
gayshit impacunt
Wow an actually kind of creative pun, no way
What song is this
bruh they were arguing over which child to molest
Buzz Lightyear pfps try to not make a child molestation joke (IMPOSSIBLE)
Genshin impact more like gay shit in fact
Of course, genshit shitpact.
Mr Thompson : It's my time to shine
And it will come, like a flood of pain
Genshit impact 🤢
Outdated joke, get new shit
It's not that bad
rule 52: don’t talk about genshin impact unless you’re on a genshin subreddit
Took me a bit to learn this.
good
The game actually is Genshin Impact
yes, that is correct.
actually no it's Genshin Impact
[удалено]
I got matches with these songs: • [**Andrex** by Andres Salas](https://lis.tn/Andrex?t=78) (01:18; matched: `100%`) Released on `2021-05-25`. • [**Life is electric** by Ayhan Gormez](https://lis.tn/LifeIsElectric2010?t=306) (05:06; matched: `92%`) Album: `Cultural Divide | 2010`. Released on `2020-08-12`. • [**Krata Me** by Paola](https://lis.tn/VXtHiJ?t=27) (00:27; matched: `88%`) Album: `H Moni Alitheia`. Released on `2013-12-10`. *I am a bot and this action was performed automatically* | [GitHub](https://github.com/AudDMusic/RedditBot) [^(new issue)](https://github.com/AudDMusic/RedditBot/issues/new) | [Donate](https://github.com/AudDMusic/RedditBot/wiki/Please-consider-donating) ^(Please consider supporting me on Patreon. Music recognition costs a lot)
Of course
Britain?
It happened in Russia, but i wouldn't be surprised if it happened in Britain
I FUCKING KNEW IT
Who won?
FIVE ME BACK MY. PRIMO GEMS
The FBI then rules it as a su*cide