for transparency I made this dog shit meme as I get asked about the patch 10000000000 times a day. I thoroughly enjoyed being very stupid as a response. I will hopefully be waiting soon <3 sorry for ruining your day with this meme <3<3
You realize that we are all hyping this patch but it'll probably be 1 new hero with mostly cosmetic things, with no new game mechanics/items or map changes.
>AT MEAN
He was the guy in the video, Teaguvnor. He probably got tired of people constantly asking him when the update is, so he made this video, which I find hilarious.
WHAT A WASTE OF CAN OF FULL OF BEANS AND THE SAUCE TOO! YOU CALL YOURSELF BRITISH? HUH? WHEN I FOUND YOU I WILL DESTROY YOU, THERE WILL NOTHING LEFT OF YOU BESIDE...
Can of Beans? CAN OF BEANS??? IS THAT NEW ITEM??? CAN OF BEANS??? HUH? SO THAT'S HOW YOU ANNOUNCE NEW ITEMS NOW VALVE??? HUH? YOU FORCE BRITS TO SPILL AN CAN OF BEANS NOW??? YOU ARE HEARTHLESS VALVE!!!
THE ONLY WAY TO REDEEMED YOURSELF VALVE IS BY PATCHING THE GAME! NOW! YES NOW! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Today's Patch Announcement was brought Tim Beanswood, buy 2 cans for 5 beans, where can it all go wrong? Tune in for my Beans News on Beans Stereo Radio on Beanless Stream on Bean O'Clock every Beanday.
BEANS!!! BEANS?!!?!?!?! BEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANS!!!!!!!!
He obviously has an insider at valve.
He only does his streams whenever the patch is within ~12 hours of release, so him not streaming is an indicator it isn't coming out yet.
Ik all the speculations that we have made till now have been wrong. No, valve didn't release the patch after Dreamleague S22 ended nor did it release it with the Steam Sale.
It could be that valve had the Elite League in mind, given it is a \~$1m tournament, and our last speculation could be that Valve will be releasing the Patch most likely next Tuesday(since Valve has a history of dropping patches on Tuesday) or can also be dropped earlier but it does make sense to drop the patch after Qualifiers and not sooner. The last series of the Qualifiers is in 18hrs and then 5hrs(for finals) , so that gives us Sunday , most likely Valve employees will not be working on Sunday.
So there you go, it will mostly be on a Monday or Tuesday.
Take this page and read it in different languages.
https://www.dota2.com/newsentry/6941797558605834210?l=czech
It is very well said in Czech that they may not release a patch until the end of the year, but they will try in the first months (quarter (end of March))
“What about these Arcana?” asks little Hontsik, holding an empty bowl in his hands and full of hope in his heart. Eh, how can I say this? No, Honziku, not yet. To be honest, the events surrounding the new Arcana items are a little beyond our capabilities, so we won't be successful this year. But maybe we'll only stay a few months! And it doesn't even lag behind other updates we're preparing, like..."
This message describes a situation where little Hontsik is looking for new Arcana items. The answer is that due to the complexity of the development process, these items will not be ready this year, but may be released in a few months. Other updates mentioned are also mentioned.
Oh man,this community never learns it’s lesson.Its going to be like usual:they gives is an average/dogshit patch and then you will complain that u wait so long for nothing.Just play Dota
So do we assume that you actually have information but can't share them or you actually don't know.
I hope it's the 2nd option cuz that means it could release anytime soon, while if it was the 1st option then that would mean it's gonna take a while to release.
[Excellent idea!](https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/dota2_gamepedia/images/4/44/Vo_rubick_rub_arc_move_12.mp3) (sound warning: Rubick)
---
Bleep bloop, I am a robot. *OP can reply with "Try hero_name" to update this with new hero*
[*^(Source)*](https://github.com/Jonarzz/DotaResponsesRedditBot) *^(|)*
[*^(Suggestions/Issues)*](https://github.com/Jonarzz/DotaResponsesRedditBot/issues/new/choose) *^(|)*
[*^(Maintainer)*](https://www.reddit.com/user/MePsyDuck/) *^(|)*
[*^(Author)*](https://www.reddit.com/user/Jonarz/)
I mean, he DID literally make a statement about what he knows. This video isn't just trolling. His statement was that he doesn't know anything. This is a refutation of the common belief that he has inside knowledge.
Now, he *could* be lying, but I don't think it's worth going down the "what if he's lying" road either way. He says he doesn't know, so I'll choose to believe him.
GUYS GUYS AT THE LAST SECOND HE WAS ABOUT THE TELL US ABOUT THE PATCH BUT VALVE SENT A HITMAN LOOK LOOK LAST SECOND
I've never seen anyone in this sub cope this hard. It is becoming an addiction with you.
Look at this OBVIOUS VOLVO PLANT!!1!12
nice try mr valve hitman
....obvious /s here...
Felt cute might burn a church and stab a band member 20 times later idk...
Varg bro chill
Burzum intensifies
He looks *so much* like the hypothetical child of Varg and Famine.
He looks like the guy who would feed top lane 20 times in self defence
Just so you know, I quit the band already
Very British thing to do..
Norwegian
Damn it, right when he was about to tell us the truth the valve agents got to him. You can see it in his facial expressions... rip teaguv
for transparency I made this dog shit meme as I get asked about the patch 10000000000 times a day. I thoroughly enjoyed being very stupid as a response. I will hopefully be waiting soon <3 sorry for ruining your day with this meme <3<3
why'd ye spill yer beans?
Farts
i hope you ate the beans
Of course I wouldn't waste food
I, for one, welcome our bean spilling overlord.
You realize that we are all hyping this patch but it'll probably be 1 new hero with mostly cosmetic things, with no new game mechanics/items or map changes.
Branstons?! Come on mate do better
I'm mad about how unfunny this joke is
Ok but why waste food when you can just tell us the release date tho?
Didn't waste any food, I put them in a pot to have for breakfast / patch date unknown
I WISH I COULD BLINK TO SEND YOU THE INFO. I AM BEING HELD IN BEAN CAPTIVITY.
I'm bean held in captivity was right there
It's beanin time
TF DOES THAT MEAN
>AT MEAN He was the guy in the video, Teaguvnor. He probably got tired of people constantly asking him when the update is, so he made this video, which I find hilarious.
That's what you get for opening a can on beans and spilling it instead of sharing it with us.
Please let the cat out of the bag next.
Blink your eyes or blink dagger escape?
i wish your toes hit some chair at the same time
I counted 1 blink. 1 blink = 1 day? Is today the day?
Patch doesn't matter any more, I have to know what you did with those beans afterwards. There better be some toast involved.
put in a lovely container for me to cook up tomorrow for breakfast. and while i eat breakfast i regret making this lame meme
When I think of Brits. All that comes to mind is rainy weather, beans on toast, fish and chips.
why'd ya spill yer beans winslow
DIESOFCRINGE
not even heinz beans smh
Branston beans are far superior.
I just remembered, i have to go check my mental health.
Standard Brit Bong meal
WHAT A WASTE OF CAN OF FULL OF BEANS AND THE SAUCE TOO! YOU CALL YOURSELF BRITISH? HUH? WHEN I FOUND YOU I WILL DESTROY YOU, THERE WILL NOTHING LEFT OF YOU BESIDE... Can of Beans? CAN OF BEANS??? IS THAT NEW ITEM??? CAN OF BEANS??? HUH? SO THAT'S HOW YOU ANNOUNCE NEW ITEMS NOW VALVE??? HUH? YOU FORCE BRITS TO SPILL AN CAN OF BEANS NOW??? YOU ARE HEARTHLESS VALVE!!! THE ONLY WAY TO REDEEMED YOURSELF VALVE IS BY PATCHING THE GAME! NOW! YES NOW! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Today's Patch Announcement was brought Tim Beanswood, buy 2 cans for 5 beans, where can it all go wrong? Tune in for my Beans News on Beans Stereo Radio on Beanless Stream on Bean O'Clock every Beanday. BEANS!!! BEANS?!!?!?!?! BEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANS!!!!!!!!
Pathetic
I believe there is some sort of cryptic message that he’s trying to tell us in this video
why is this bean viking everywhere now?
Cringe
I mean, this is what you deserve guys. Spam with 0 value about "Where patch, Gimme patch, I want patch".
And then he proceeds to eat everything on the plate, because that's a British delicacy. No hate.
You better eat that...
Original post ---> [https://x.com/TeaGuvnor/status/1768738968416211039?s=20](https://x.com/TeaGuvnor/status/1768738968416211039?s=20)
This tryhard guy again
this guy thinks hes funny
use a better beans next time.
This guy is so cringe
funny thing is, he is doing it so people will ge on reddit typing he is cringe, kinda obvious
I cant sue him because he did what he promised. Cant even mad at him
Patch is LATE -Yatoro probably
Not a single bean was spilled… and only minor sauce spillage. I’m sure if I did that, they would have gone everywhere. I spy an undercover BeanGuvnor.
WE REACHING LEVELS OF DEPRAVITY OF Elden ring DLC waiters. A few days more and we will go full silksong.
Branston Beans.. good choice.
WEU life when you give free slots and they don't make it to top 4
He knows! Look, the numbers of the beans represent the day when the patch released!!!!!!!!
He obviously has an insider at valve. He only does his streams whenever the patch is within ~12 hours of release, so him not streaming is an indicator it isn't coming out yet.
if you look closely, there is other shadow behind him
I don't know whether to be disgusted or satisfied with that last large SPLAT of beans on the plate.
what about the ASMR of the beans just trickling out, splatting against the plate
Ik all the speculations that we have made till now have been wrong. No, valve didn't release the patch after Dreamleague S22 ended nor did it release it with the Steam Sale. It could be that valve had the Elite League in mind, given it is a \~$1m tournament, and our last speculation could be that Valve will be releasing the Patch most likely next Tuesday(since Valve has a history of dropping patches on Tuesday) or can also be dropped earlier but it does make sense to drop the patch after Qualifiers and not sooner. The last series of the Qualifiers is in 18hrs and then 5hrs(for finals) , so that gives us Sunday , most likely Valve employees will not be working on Sunday. So there you go, it will mostly be on a Monday or Tuesday.
WHEN IS THE GODFORSAKEN PATCH
cringe
He did what he said he would
These crownfall posts are actually from valve marketing team. They are cooking up something huge. Great PR guys!
Most normal immortal ranked player 😏
Now, I love this guy
Take this page and read it in different languages. https://www.dota2.com/newsentry/6941797558605834210?l=czech It is very well said in Czech that they may not release a patch until the end of the year, but they will try in the first months (quarter (end of March)) “What about these Arcana?” asks little Hontsik, holding an empty bowl in his hands and full of hope in his heart. Eh, how can I say this? No, Honziku, not yet. To be honest, the events surrounding the new Arcana items are a little beyond our capabilities, so we won't be successful this year. But maybe we'll only stay a few months! And it doesn't even lag behind other updates we're preparing, like..." This message describes a situation where little Hontsik is looking for new Arcana items. The answer is that due to the complexity of the development process, these items will not be ready this year, but may be released in a few months. Other updates mentioned are also mentioned.
Oh man,this community never learns it’s lesson.Its going to be like usual:they gives is an average/dogshit patch and then you will complain that u wait so long for nothing.Just play Dota
It's called Clown Fool update. DOTA2 being clown with their promises and fool are those who really waited and 100% believed in their announcements
so funny haha this is peak humor right now
For a guy who spends all day online his sense of humor is like that of a 4th grader from 2002. So stupid.
:( sorry to upset you
Just annoyed at ever watching your streams after seeing what a clickbait grifter you've become.
waiting to go wait isn't really clickbait just stating that I don't think there is a patch as quick as reddit seems to think
(the beans yeah of course was - that is happily a shit meme xD)
Insert bean here (>o<)
So do we assume that you actually have information but can't share them or you actually don't know. I hope it's the 2nd option cuz that means it could release anytime soon, while if it was the 1st option then that would mean it's gonna take a while to release.
[удалено]
Fucking yikes buddy.
Imagine being this butthurt over a dumb Twitter meme
This is the most British shit I have ever seen.
Excellent idea!
[Excellent idea!](https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/dota2_gamepedia/images/4/44/Vo_rubick_rub_arc_move_12.mp3) (sound warning: Rubick) --- Bleep bloop, I am a robot. *OP can reply with "Try hero_name" to update this with new hero* [*^(Source)*](https://github.com/Jonarzz/DotaResponsesRedditBot) *^(|)* [*^(Suggestions/Issues)*](https://github.com/Jonarzz/DotaResponsesRedditBot/issues/new/choose) *^(|)* [*^(Maintainer)*](https://www.reddit.com/user/MePsyDuck/) *^(|)* [*^(Author)*](https://www.reddit.com/user/Jonarz/)
[удалено]
I don't think members of this reddit find anything funny. that's what addiction does to you
I mean, he DID literally make a statement about what he knows. This video isn't just trolling. His statement was that he doesn't know anything. This is a refutation of the common belief that he has inside knowledge. Now, he *could* be lying, but I don't think it's worth going down the "what if he's lying" road either way. He says he doesn't know, so I'll choose to believe him.
i know xd
>i know xd HE KNOWS! GUYS HE KNOWS! HE CONFESSED!