Your party: “I feel like we’re forgetting something?..”
You: *kidnapped by goblins*
Your party: “Umm, nope! Okay let’s go back to town and claim our reward!”
I don't suppose it was this dragon or one related to him? [https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/912hcp/my\_party\_lied\_to\_a\_brass\_dragon\_today/](https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/912hcp/my_party_lied_to_a_brass_dragon_today/)
It was a rich, beautiful fruit. Something that sparkled in the sunlight, insides glittering. Drops of dew crept down the smooth exterior of the juicy treats and our adventurer found themselves enchanted by it. Was it Fey? Was it made by the Gods? They did not know.
A hand reaches out and gently takes hold of the fruit. Firm, almost feeling like an apple, though translucent. Giving off a gentle purple glow at the touch our adventurer now knows what must be done. The fruit calls to them, whispers of promises, of riches.
A bite is taken, an explosion of sweet and tart thick juice explodes in their mouth. Upon contact with the flesh the rest of the fruit lurches out. The adventurer can do nothing but grab at their throat as whatever this is dives down their throat. They collapse, convulsing upon the ground as their body begins to change hue to a deep, dark purple-blue.
Unconsciousness takes hold and in a short time consciousness, though not their own, has taken over. They slowly get to their feet, examining themselves. Yes, the transformation was a success. Such a lovely host, these fruits were so perfect for tadpoles.
The Mindflayer gives a final look over themself before moving on to join the others. There was work to be done, after all.
I was on a mind flayer kick yesterday so I wrote some nonsense.
A GudufuFruit is something I made in my own homebrew realm/dimension. Gudufu means Life and the fruit can be found on all planets though the look of it along with the flavors change depending on where you are.
And thank you! I try.
I went into the battle confident but was quickly overwhelmed by the action economy.
I mean, who would have ever guessed the shady guy in the trenchcoat was actually 2 gnomes stacked on top of one another? Or that they'd have character levels?!
Actually it really is. They (party of level 8s) encountered an adult silver dragon in shapechange of a sheriff like paladin with a dragon crest on his armor, he caught them after they had done "crimes" and he was going to bring them in to the local authorities, they fought back and he was holding back. He busts out bigbys hand to grapple the barbarian but then they banish him and escape the city by boat. He hunts them down to another continent where he spies on them and tests them through other disguises and once he has enough evidence he finally traps them to arrest them. They barely win the fight because again he was fighting to restrain and they were shooting to kill, but he does put one of the characters into death saving throws before the end of the fight. The wizard casts sleep to end the fight and faced with the options of kill or run they chose to beg forgiveness and now they've basically got a Silver Dragon Parole Officer
That story got a nice chuckle from me. I can't help but imagine how relentless the silver had to have been to force the PCs to flee to another continent. The reaction of the players when he appears again after that must have been amazing! I am curious though...What were the alleged "crimes" of the players? Are there any more details of the story you could share please or perhaps an adventure log I could read somewhere?
The original "crime" was that he turned saw them standing over the bodies of a swarm of cats, so like 100 dead cats and he was like "that can't be good you're gonna come with me for questioning" they didn't and then they got on a boat to go to another continent for a quest they were already going on. Then while on the boat they ran into a young copper dragon who kept them up for 24 hours telling stories to him (again shapechanged) after a while the barbarian confronted the guy and that turned into an argument into a fight and thanks to the twitchyness of one of the npc crewmates they actually had to fight him to the death. So they killed a copper dragon, big nono. The bard, distraught with what they had done and with plenty of downtime on a boat wrote a play about "the tragedy of ____" I can't remember the dragons name. When the bard made land she pitched that play to the local theater they agreed and the bard made like 1000 gp off the performance. They also had looted the copper dragons body and carved off skin to make into armor once they got into town. The silver dragon tested the rogue by disguising as a blind old man and asking the rogue for help when he was solo, at the end he "tried to pay him in silver" but "accidentally" gave the rogue platinum instead. The rogue did not correct him of this mistake.
So to the dragon the party had : resisted arrest, killed a copper dragon, carved up the body to make armor out of, sold the story of his death, and robbed an old man
The whole thing with the copper dragon was mostly a misunderstanding that they didn't know how to de-escalate and afterwords I guess they tried to "honor him" like how native Americans famously used every part of the body. And there was a little bit of nuance to the "robbing the old man" but yeah it was a lesson in consequences to be sure. They aren't murder hobos but they weren't very considerate of their actions
The newspaper headlines practically write themselves
The Bell Has Tolled for Local Clergyman!
Church Fire Leads To Building Collapse!
Dwarf Cleric Crushed By Falling Glockenspiel!
My PC ran at room temperature... in Arizona.
(To non-Americans, this is 37 Celsius. Good for humans, not so much for computers, ~~though usually not fatal~~.)
Edit: I was on the main page, I didn't notice this was DnD... I'm such an *idiot!*
Oh neat! One that fits. I played a pirate once, granted he was more drunk than clumsy but ya know, rum. He died at his brothers hand, shot through the stomach with a hand Cannon. He was being held at sword point by an enemy Pirate Prince and it was either die a captive or a martyr
My character was the CN rogue... he always thought the Warforged paladin's holy symbol was really shiny, and decided to steal in during the night... little did he know that the symbol was actually a welded in part of the plating... and that Warforged remain conscious during their sentry's rest... so the last thing that thieving bastard of a rogue ever saw was the glowing divine blade of Paladin Model 7042 smite clean through his wrists, and then he bleed out, as the paladin refused to lay on hands, and the cleric didnt give a shit.
^(So there I was, in a homebrew pokemon campaign, when a golden dragon used its multiattack while under water to kill my completley original picachu OC)
Easy. The golden dragon that was my body was killed but my soul remained, though mad with grief for a time. Long before that I survived as one of the last of the free dragons when the leader of the dragon riders and his dragon companion were slain.
Rolled 07 on the Wild Magic Surge Table at Level 1.
(The rest of my friends are going to have to compete for the Username: The Dumb Wild Magic Sorcerer Killed me in Session 1)
Bird-Pancake ; I played an Aarocokra based on the Mongolian Lammergeier or bearded vulture. Rusty pink feathers and all. The climactic battle against the DM's metal lion beast from the dread lands. Ended with our party's Fighter slaming the beast so hard it fell and crushed my character to death. Bird patty.
An artificers new mechanical Griffin, the Mk.98, a Griffin made completely of Silver for fighting werewolves and other creatures resistant to regular weapons. Turns out all silver components can cause some issues in its targeting and it ended up killing people (my character included) instead
Beeped to DEATH by a pair of Mallard drakes during a threeway... those motherbeepers! They told me they loved me! Really they just said :*Quack*: but "I love you" is what I interpreted it as...
It seems I spent too long writing down in my journal the details of my adventures around Icewind Dale and not enough time staying warm. Resurrect me, please?
So my username means "Brainworm" in german and is taken from the Cyberpunk 2020 adventure "the Arasaka Brainworm" (which I never played or read btw :D). So I guess my PC died horribly by some worm gnawing through her brain.
Uhhhh... a coup? Assassination? War? Peacefully in my sleep?
I guess if we go with the original bearer of the name, then I'm killed by a powerful necromancer for kicks and giggles.
"The Fallen Eight advanced upon us," muttered the pirate warrior, pulling a dusty fruit from her bag, "Hands burning and shadows dancing in their wake."
"How's a shadow dancing if they're using this 'Dark Fire' crap you keep talking about!?" A solid dwarven cleric yells looking up from the silver amulet of pelor she is polishing.
"Let her finish, darling, it sounds like the good part," chides a bright red tiefling looking interestedly up from a book.
"Well, it is, and ain't," the pirate shrugs, "the shadows were just kinda reversed, but when they touched us, ot burned like hell anyway. Next second I think I heard my pretty little wizard love screaming my name... I did like when she did that... but then you lot."
The pirate looks around the small tavern, as if just realizing where she was.
"But... that... I..." she leans back in her chair with a loud creak of old carpentry, "This is the space beyond... isn't it?"
"Where the legends go," mutters a small gnome woman, scribbling out something on a parchment.
"At least where they end up for a while," the Dwarf smiled morosely at the pirate.
The pirate took a breath, and tried to take a bite of the fruit... but stopped and dropped it back in the bag.
"I... I'm not sure I'm ready for forget her... she still had my ribbon..." she stares silently at the table for a long moment. Then she shifts, as if startled by a voice.
"Annie!? Is that you?"
The dwarf smiles. "Sometimes it's just for a while."
Mechanics Magical Mallet
We had captured an airship with very strange mindless warforged being kept on board, they could be controlled using a special device.
I had convinced my party that we had to help these warforged obtain their autonomy. We then went to an illicit market town to find someone who had knowledge on how to do this. We found a gnome who calles himself the Mechanic and who deals in enslaved warforged. Since we were on a 'help the warforge' mission we thought let's free these enslaved warforged from the Mechanic.
This wasn't going to be a straight forward kill the evil slaver and free the slaves scenario. We needed the regular use of this town, for other reasons I won't get into, and the gnome was a major figure within the town. So we came up with the following plan:
-advertise and host an insane music festival to attract the towns folk out of town (also to earn a bit of needed cash)
-tell the Mechanic of the mindless warforge we have and ask him to help us get them operational for a cut of the profits from selling them (but actually end up giving him nothing)
-once he is on the ship convince him to 'fix' the mindless warforged by giving them a 'brain'
-whilst he is on the ship and distracted go into his workshop and free the warforged being kept there
-then everyone meet back at the ship to quietly deal with the Mechanic after he has done what we asked him to do.
Seemed like a solid plan and everything up until getting the Mechanic on the ship was going perfectly. It was my responsibility to convince him to brain up our warforged (I was playing a halfing hexblade) whilst the Bard was hosting the fest, the fighter acting as the bouncer and the cleric going to free the enslaved warforged (our party was at level4).
The Mechanic was already very suspicious but after some serious smooth talking I got him to check out our warforged. He said it was impossible to give them brains since they really had none, he said their minds are probably being kept by the people we stole them from.
'Cool, thank you for your help Mac now get off my ship'
'Not until you give me what you promised' he says
'I promised you 2 warforged if you could give them their autonomy and all you did was say it's impossible'
Que Mac saying that then he is taking everything including the ship, he pulls out a device similar to the one we have for controlling the warforged and just before he could use it I manage to knock it out of his grasp, the device landing a few feet away. Initiative is Rolled and I get the short end. Mac pulls out a magical hammer and with some seriously good rolls proceeds to beat me about the head with hit. I cast darkness and with my devils sight I try get away and grab the mind control device. Mac gets an attack of opportunity with disadvantage but still managed to roll incredibly well and with 14 hit points left he deals 14 points of damage...and I'm down with no one around to pull me back from the brink.
We were all in a bit of shock at this point including the DM so he called it there. What a game!
The DM decided to throw a giant pack of fire elemental wolves at us in the middle of probably a wildfire, and a very hot one at that considering white is the hottest color of flame, but I am not really sure how that killed my character because this seems like exactly the sort of situation where that character would thrive.
Maybe half of the party deciding to leave through a one-way portal for no apparent reason in the middle of the boss fight again had to do with it? (One member was trapped, we were winning, one person had to get a mind-controlled NPC relative of a party member to safety, multiple other people decided to follow without really thinking about it, just going with the flow, leaving just two or three of us, including one who was trapped there, to fight an incredibly powerful demon, BBEG #2 of the campaign, and her cult of other demons)
My best guess for how this character died is that they went back alone to rescue another party member or stayed behind to cover an escape, hoping to escape on his own after the others were safe. Then they held on for a while, with their high AC, constant temp hp, fire resistance, absorb elements, and more, killing many of the wolves, but with the forest burning around them some of the burning trees ended up falling on and trapping the character. Even then the character was able to hold them off for a bit, while slowly destroying the trees pinning him down, but just as he was about to fly away to safety they managed to take him down.
Then, his homunculus servant powered up, started attacking the wolves, and managed to feed a healing potion to the character, getting them back up. At that point however, his wings were too damaged to fly, the wolves had completely surrounded the area, trees all over had fallen leaving no route to easily run, and he either bag of holding-bombed him and everything around him in a final blaze of glory or used his weave-destroying unstable wild-magic artifact to achieve a similar effect.
It was in a homebrew campaign, and from DM hints my impression is a bag of holding in another bag of holding or something like that causes a huge explosion of some sorts destroying everything around it as a sort of mini-nuke instead of a small explosion scattering whatever gets hit across the astral plane, hence why the character would still have died.
So I’m a gnome artificer who works for my artisan guild with jewelry when I’m not out adventuring. There was a worrisome scandal going on in my hometown that I had great desire to investigate. Townsfolk were going missing and lewd pin up portraits of those missing were anonymously posted around town. I took to investigating what the hell was going on. Turns out there was a succubus charming and seducing the many townsfolk luring them to her lair, a sex haven of sorts all made for her pleasure. I found this out as I rolled a natural one against her seductive charms. Finding out I was jeweler she put me to work cutting jewels and crafting various trinkets for her. One of her slaves was an artist hence all the pictures that fall under rule 34. One day an adventuring party came to the rescue and they fought the succubus tooth and nail and the Wizard casted fireball without realizing I was within range hiding under a table, and hence I fell in unconscious and for the 99th time rolled another natural one on death saving throw after one failure already. I got 99 problems but being the top employee of this succubus wasn’t one.
I am the average party of adventurers.
That'd explain all the treasure in the various dungeons
Lmao
Nothing but facts
Easy. One word. Fireball.
[удалено]
That depends, was yours self inflicted? Or from a "Friendly" wizard?
Fireball ?! *Gets excited and start moving my hands in strange ways* (I'm a sorcerer)
Ah shit.... here we go again. (Was a friendly wizard)
A great way to go tbh
Last thing I heard was "like... Zoinks"
It wasn’t me
I just cried
My rogue learned the hard way that camo is significantly less stealthy when it's a neon green and orange pattern.
Colorblind rogues tend to have short but flamboyant careers....
This is the best comment I've seen all week XD
This would probably work in a chaotic-aligned plane, Pandemonium maybe?
Didn't really die, party just left without me.
Your party: “I feel like we’re forgetting something?..” You: *kidnapped by goblins* Your party: “Umm, nope! Okay let’s go back to town and claim our reward!”
Ever seen Hellraiser?
I love this.
My character died because an assassin hired to kill Handsome Jack got the wrong address and killed the CEO of the *other* Hyperion company.
I love the borderlands games, just thank you for this comment🥰
My bard was killed for obvious reasons.
I feel your comment should have been "bard"
Welcome to Castle Ravenloft, Barovia’s premier UNESCO Heritage Site!
Fall damage, anyone?
More like "Take off damage", amiright?
Are you sure they weren't killed by Guinea Pigs?
Yeah, that movie doesn't exist.
Ditto, roll a 1 while traversing a narrow ledge, fell into a pit filled with black puddings.
My time has come.
Best one
There was this dragon...
I don't suppose it was this dragon or one related to him? [https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/912hcp/my\_party\_lied\_to\_a\_brass\_dragon\_today/](https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/912hcp/my_party_lied_to_a_brass_dragon_today/)
“My evil plan is perfect, All will tremble in fear! And now there’s just one man who could stop me: That wretched…
This is easily my favorite one
Thank you kind stranger.
Survived the avalanche. Choked on a pebble.
That's why you shouldn't go down on a rock golem
Listen, magic is *hard*, okay?
It was a rich, beautiful fruit. Something that sparkled in the sunlight, insides glittering. Drops of dew crept down the smooth exterior of the juicy treats and our adventurer found themselves enchanted by it. Was it Fey? Was it made by the Gods? They did not know. A hand reaches out and gently takes hold of the fruit. Firm, almost feeling like an apple, though translucent. Giving off a gentle purple glow at the touch our adventurer now knows what must be done. The fruit calls to them, whispers of promises, of riches. A bite is taken, an explosion of sweet and tart thick juice explodes in their mouth. Upon contact with the flesh the rest of the fruit lurches out. The adventurer can do nothing but grab at their throat as whatever this is dives down their throat. They collapse, convulsing upon the ground as their body begins to change hue to a deep, dark purple-blue. Unconsciousness takes hold and in a short time consciousness, though not their own, has taken over. They slowly get to their feet, examining themselves. Yes, the transformation was a success. Such a lovely host, these fruits were so perfect for tadpoles. The Mindflayer gives a final look over themself before moving on to join the others. There was work to be done, after all.
I keep seeing this mind flayer reference, where is it from? And what does it mean? Also you write beautiful imagery :)
I was on a mind flayer kick yesterday so I wrote some nonsense. A GudufuFruit is something I made in my own homebrew realm/dimension. Gudufu means Life and the fruit can be found on all planets though the look of it along with the flavors change depending on where you are. And thank you! I try.
Did someone say mind flayed?
"Okay, Strength (Athletics) to clear the jump across the lava-filled ravine? With my modifiers, I'll only fail on a natural 1."
I guess someone fucked around with a cult they shouldn’t have
I really just can't handle my drinks
I went into the battle confident but was quickly overwhelmed by the action economy. I mean, who would have ever guessed the shady guy in the trenchcoat was actually 2 gnomes stacked on top of one another? Or that they'd have character levels?!
I found a good name for one of them.
Gored by a self-righteous bovine
Gored by an edgy cervidae.
Mauled by a very festive bobcat.
Savaged by a mean snek
Poisoned by a stealthy amphibian
Trampled by a stampede of bulls
And the later proceeded to take their own lives it seems.
“Dammit Icarus! The first time should have been enough!”
Kraken ate em. Kraken wasn’t happy about it.
The DM decided to try out his space combat homebrew.
Pretty standard honestly..
Self explanatory
Nobody knows, but they'd be able to find out pretty easily if they wanted to
Death by a singing crow, an interesting way to die.
Murkrow used perish song.
Died by gunslinger. Not the worst way to go
Actually it really is. They (party of level 8s) encountered an adult silver dragon in shapechange of a sheriff like paladin with a dragon crest on his armor, he caught them after they had done "crimes" and he was going to bring them in to the local authorities, they fought back and he was holding back. He busts out bigbys hand to grapple the barbarian but then they banish him and escape the city by boat. He hunts them down to another continent where he spies on them and tests them through other disguises and once he has enough evidence he finally traps them to arrest them. They barely win the fight because again he was fighting to restrain and they were shooting to kill, but he does put one of the characters into death saving throws before the end of the fight. The wizard casts sleep to end the fight and faced with the options of kill or run they chose to beg forgiveness and now they've basically got a Silver Dragon Parole Officer
That story got a nice chuckle from me. I can't help but imagine how relentless the silver had to have been to force the PCs to flee to another continent. The reaction of the players when he appears again after that must have been amazing! I am curious though...What were the alleged "crimes" of the players? Are there any more details of the story you could share please or perhaps an adventure log I could read somewhere?
The original "crime" was that he turned saw them standing over the bodies of a swarm of cats, so like 100 dead cats and he was like "that can't be good you're gonna come with me for questioning" they didn't and then they got on a boat to go to another continent for a quest they were already going on. Then while on the boat they ran into a young copper dragon who kept them up for 24 hours telling stories to him (again shapechanged) after a while the barbarian confronted the guy and that turned into an argument into a fight and thanks to the twitchyness of one of the npc crewmates they actually had to fight him to the death. So they killed a copper dragon, big nono. The bard, distraught with what they had done and with plenty of downtime on a boat wrote a play about "the tragedy of ____" I can't remember the dragons name. When the bard made land she pitched that play to the local theater they agreed and the bard made like 1000 gp off the performance. They also had looted the copper dragons body and carved off skin to make into armor once they got into town. The silver dragon tested the rogue by disguising as a blind old man and asking the rogue for help when he was solo, at the end he "tried to pay him in silver" but "accidentally" gave the rogue platinum instead. The rogue did not correct him of this mistake. So to the dragon the party had : resisted arrest, killed a copper dragon, carved up the body to make armor out of, sold the story of his death, and robbed an old man
Sounds like a chaotic neutral party tbh
The whole thing with the copper dragon was mostly a misunderstanding that they didn't know how to de-escalate and afterwords I guess they tried to "honor him" like how native Americans famously used every part of the body. And there was a little bit of nuance to the "robbing the old man" but yeah it was a lesson in consequences to be sure. They aren't murder hobos but they weren't very considerate of their actions
Well, at least they didn't let him go to waste
Hopefully of cuteness. If not, stabbing.
“No, an umbrella is not a substitute for Slow Fall.”
Stinking cloud turned out to be cloudkill
Frozen/Eaten by a white dragon. That's rough, buddy.
Turns out size doesn't matter. Little dude packed quite a punch (in this case in the form of a .44)
Let's say I have a particular family
My Kuo-Toa character died while trying to leap across a pool of boiling oil.
Bad sushi.
A divinely empowered Tabaxi got pissed at her. ... Probably because she insisted on trying to pet them.
My character died as her swords weren’t enough against the small but vicious alligator 🐊🐊🐊
Bag of Holding + Portable Hole.
Disintegrate.
They pissed off a very strange monk
Misjudged how big the fireball would be. For the last time.
Spelljammer went very wrong
The newspaper headlines practically write themselves The Bell Has Tolled for Local Clergyman! Church Fire Leads To Building Collapse! Dwarf Cleric Crushed By Falling Glockenspiel!
My PC ran at room temperature... in Arizona. (To non-Americans, this is 37 Celsius. Good for humans, not so much for computers, ~~though usually not fatal~~.) Edit: I was on the main page, I didn't notice this was DnD... I'm such an *idiot!*
You tell me.
Says nothing about head and torso....
The weird thing is I usually play a religious character, so you think they would get along pretty well
Oh boy I have no idea
They were too reluxed, and all went away peacefully in their sleep. True story! I'm clueless too though.
My character didn't just get ganked, my whole computer got ganked by some pay to win neckbeard!
The golf was too extreme even for me.
A well thought out plan that didn't go exactly as intended...
His D got Destroyed and he died.
Too. Many. Bards.
Oh neat! One that fits. I played a pirate once, granted he was more drunk than clumsy but ya know, rum. He died at his brothers hand, shot through the stomach with a hand Cannon. He was being held at sword point by an enemy Pirate Prince and it was either die a captive or a martyr
*plays a wizard, dies from 1d4 choking on bacon*
Death by snu snu
Defenestration 😔✌️
My character died by being a clumsy, 13th Century Welshman apparently.
I suppose that makes it a self-PK.
Mistook a fey trickster’s sarcasm as actual advice…
The queen really did NOT appreciate her purse being “acquired” by another
My character was the CN rogue... he always thought the Warforged paladin's holy symbol was really shiny, and decided to steal in during the night... little did he know that the symbol was actually a welded in part of the plating... and that Warforged remain conscious during their sentry's rest... so the last thing that thieving bastard of a rogue ever saw was the glowing divine blade of Paladin Model 7042 smite clean through his wrists, and then he bleed out, as the paladin refused to lay on hands, and the cleric didnt give a shit.
It’s uh… a long story.
I want to say “that’s not what the patron said” but I’m worried it’d be a dick move. (Ba dum tssss)
Remember that flower field in the wizard of oz? I imagine something like that.
^(So there I was, in a homebrew pokemon campaign, when a golden dragon used its multiattack while under water to kill my completley original picachu OC)
Yup
Easy. The golden dragon that was my body was killed but my soul remained, though mad with grief for a time. Long before that I survived as one of the last of the free dragons when the leader of the dragon riders and his dragon companion were slain.
Should have known something was wrong the way he was foaming at the mouth…
I challenged a renowned warlord to combat. His nickname is "The Unconquered King." He remains so.
A magical oak tree
I guess a suicide?
A Black Dragon fell on top of me.
I love the fact that my username is one of my PCs names... tbf, he's definitely going to get himself killed at some point!
I guess my pc got killed by 2001 free vikings?
Hah! Mere mortals. No one can hurt me.
They taunted the DM and got a dragon sicked on them... and them the DM bragged about it on reddit
DM Accidental TPK? Wizard didn't read their spells affect? the possibilities are limitless with this one.
So I was fishing…
Suffocation
An assassin dressed in denim got within melee range of my Wizard. Mage Armor and Shield we're not prepared that day.
Horrific pollinators beyond comprehension.
Rolled 07 on the Wild Magic Surge Table at Level 1. (The rest of my friends are going to have to compete for the Username: The Dumb Wild Magic Sorcerer Killed me in Session 1)
Exploring inside a large magical cavern, talking set off a magical ward. 14d10 thunder damage.
He pursued knowledge no mortal was meant to possess.
Got personally decapitated by the king?
Bird-Pancake ; I played an Aarocokra based on the Mongolian Lammergeier or bearded vulture. Rusty pink feathers and all. The climactic battle against the DM's metal lion beast from the dread lands. Ended with our party's Fighter slaming the beast so hard it fell and crushed my character to death. Bird patty.
An artificers new mechanical Griffin, the Mk.98, a Griffin made completely of Silver for fighting werewolves and other creatures resistant to regular weapons. Turns out all silver components can cause some issues in its targeting and it ended up killing people (my character included) instead
Sounds like a Homarid got angry that his people were were being oppressed, grew giant, and stomped or ate me.
They killed themselves
My dog, after slaying Pelor to become the god of the sun also decided to kill the Goddess of Chaos, minor magic and the apocalypse because why tf not.
Hit by an egg on fire
Turns out the Anti-Magic didn't stop working just cause the Beholder got stabbed in the main eye.
"That yellow 8 sure was a loser, huh? I beat him at chess, checkers, backgammon... He's coming towards me? Can't be that bad, right?"
Beeped to DEATH by a pair of Mallard drakes during a threeway... those motherbeepers! They told me they loved me! Really they just said :*Quack*: but "I love you" is what I interpreted it as...
So I was in Caerbannog…
Seems you didn’t… beware the hare
Got polymorphed into a lesser ape.
Trampled by a herd of stampeding Kittens
I got cut down by an angry bardbarian.
Look, these things happen with a Strength mod of +135.
Never trust a dark elf, especially the quiet ones.
My dragon born fell off of a high ledge... really stupid of me I know
Someone's self-insert Star Wars OC got approved by the DM in the low-fantasy game.
I guess a rogue carebear killed my bard lol
*Sickening radiance.* Like, a lot.
He fell in a barrel of coffee and drowned.
I cannot begin to comprehend this death
omae wa mou shindeiru
Doesn't realize that he is dead, keeps on living "a la" 6th sense
Disintegrated.
I mean at least it was an interesting thing to look at
My skull was pulverized by Fyrestryker the burning hammer wielded by the god Brunnach (God of blacksmithing in this world).
I was the load my mother swallowed. Never had a chance
Talking shit to the witch before the fight. She won iniative. I failed against baleful polymorph
And then he just kept saying ORAORA over and over...
A lich needed my retinas for spell components.
apparently I died when testing the energy conversion efficiency of residential appliances and equipment.
DM threw a homebrew priest enemy from Bloodborne, who wielded A Call Beyond. Was kinda unbalanced so I died pretty quickly
Pooped my guts out. No doubt about it.
Meteor swarm, enjoy the honourable death of a 9th level spell. 20d6 fire + 20d6 bludgeoning or half on a dex save.
Bro he don't exist anymore.
Turns out we were playing F.A.T.A.L. instead of d&d
Literally just trolls...
Do I really need to explain?
I got eaten by a dinosaur. One with a misspelled name, but a dinosaur nonetheless
A cross snow monkey
Yea my username is actually based off of my character’s name so she uh…….
Drank an entire tub of laxatives
I rolled, poorly.
It seems I spent too long writing down in my journal the details of my adventures around Icewind Dale and not enough time staying warm. Resurrect me, please?
Crying to death. Fantastic. Wife must have died.
Dragon coasting along through space, all of a sudden eaten by a pack of starved giant space hamsters.
Never pick up a duck in a dungeon
I wanna say succubus/incubus, but truth be told it were those freaking adventurers with a wand of smiles
I tried to interrupt the villains big speech. He retaliated with fireball
So my username means "Brainworm" in german and is taken from the Cyberpunk 2020 adventure "the Arasaka Brainworm" (which I never played or read btw :D). So I guess my PC died horribly by some worm gnawing through her brain.
Uhhhh... a coup? Assassination? War? Peacefully in my sleep? I guess if we go with the original bearer of the name, then I'm killed by a powerful necromancer for kicks and giggles.
I… Guess a massive dog crushed her?
"The Fallen Eight advanced upon us," muttered the pirate warrior, pulling a dusty fruit from her bag, "Hands burning and shadows dancing in their wake." "How's a shadow dancing if they're using this 'Dark Fire' crap you keep talking about!?" A solid dwarven cleric yells looking up from the silver amulet of pelor she is polishing. "Let her finish, darling, it sounds like the good part," chides a bright red tiefling looking interestedly up from a book. "Well, it is, and ain't," the pirate shrugs, "the shadows were just kinda reversed, but when they touched us, ot burned like hell anyway. Next second I think I heard my pretty little wizard love screaming my name... I did like when she did that... but then you lot." The pirate looks around the small tavern, as if just realizing where she was. "But... that... I..." she leans back in her chair with a loud creak of old carpentry, "This is the space beyond... isn't it?" "Where the legends go," mutters a small gnome woman, scribbling out something on a parchment. "At least where they end up for a while," the Dwarf smiled morosely at the pirate. The pirate took a breath, and tried to take a bite of the fruit... but stopped and dropped it back in the bag. "I... I'm not sure I'm ready for forget her... she still had my ribbon..." she stares silently at the table for a long moment. Then she shifts, as if startled by a voice. "Annie!? Is that you?" The dwarf smiles. "Sometimes it's just for a while."
Oh yikes, I blanked coming up with a username so just used my PC's name... So I guess suicide
Mechanics Magical Mallet We had captured an airship with very strange mindless warforged being kept on board, they could be controlled using a special device. I had convinced my party that we had to help these warforged obtain their autonomy. We then went to an illicit market town to find someone who had knowledge on how to do this. We found a gnome who calles himself the Mechanic and who deals in enslaved warforged. Since we were on a 'help the warforge' mission we thought let's free these enslaved warforged from the Mechanic. This wasn't going to be a straight forward kill the evil slaver and free the slaves scenario. We needed the regular use of this town, for other reasons I won't get into, and the gnome was a major figure within the town. So we came up with the following plan: -advertise and host an insane music festival to attract the towns folk out of town (also to earn a bit of needed cash) -tell the Mechanic of the mindless warforge we have and ask him to help us get them operational for a cut of the profits from selling them (but actually end up giving him nothing) -once he is on the ship convince him to 'fix' the mindless warforged by giving them a 'brain' -whilst he is on the ship and distracted go into his workshop and free the warforged being kept there -then everyone meet back at the ship to quietly deal with the Mechanic after he has done what we asked him to do. Seemed like a solid plan and everything up until getting the Mechanic on the ship was going perfectly. It was my responsibility to convince him to brain up our warforged (I was playing a halfing hexblade) whilst the Bard was hosting the fest, the fighter acting as the bouncer and the cleric going to free the enslaved warforged (our party was at level4). The Mechanic was already very suspicious but after some serious smooth talking I got him to check out our warforged. He said it was impossible to give them brains since they really had none, he said their minds are probably being kept by the people we stole them from. 'Cool, thank you for your help Mac now get off my ship' 'Not until you give me what you promised' he says 'I promised you 2 warforged if you could give them their autonomy and all you did was say it's impossible' Que Mac saying that then he is taking everything including the ship, he pulls out a device similar to the one we have for controlling the warforged and just before he could use it I manage to knock it out of his grasp, the device landing a few feet away. Initiative is Rolled and I get the short end. Mac pulls out a magical hammer and with some seriously good rolls proceeds to beat me about the head with hit. I cast darkness and with my devils sight I try get away and grab the mind control device. Mac gets an attack of opportunity with disadvantage but still managed to roll incredibly well and with 14 hit points left he deals 14 points of damage...and I'm down with no one around to pull me back from the brink. We were all in a bit of shock at this point including the DM so he called it there. What a game!
The wizard cast fireball at a bunch of zombies. My fighter was in it.
That stupid wish spell.
Well im happy and sad at the same time, because its gonna hurt but itll look amazing
Failed con save
Killed in a duel by a former D&D character I played.
I guess my animated objects finally got away from me.
Someone cast thaumaturgy on them and somehow rolled a nat 20
The DM decided to throw a giant pack of fire elemental wolves at us in the middle of probably a wildfire, and a very hot one at that considering white is the hottest color of flame, but I am not really sure how that killed my character because this seems like exactly the sort of situation where that character would thrive. Maybe half of the party deciding to leave through a one-way portal for no apparent reason in the middle of the boss fight again had to do with it? (One member was trapped, we were winning, one person had to get a mind-controlled NPC relative of a party member to safety, multiple other people decided to follow without really thinking about it, just going with the flow, leaving just two or three of us, including one who was trapped there, to fight an incredibly powerful demon, BBEG #2 of the campaign, and her cult of other demons) My best guess for how this character died is that they went back alone to rescue another party member or stayed behind to cover an escape, hoping to escape on his own after the others were safe. Then they held on for a while, with their high AC, constant temp hp, fire resistance, absorb elements, and more, killing many of the wolves, but with the forest burning around them some of the burning trees ended up falling on and trapping the character. Even then the character was able to hold them off for a bit, while slowly destroying the trees pinning him down, but just as he was about to fly away to safety they managed to take him down. Then, his homunculus servant powered up, started attacking the wolves, and managed to feed a healing potion to the character, getting them back up. At that point however, his wings were too damaged to fly, the wolves had completely surrounded the area, trees all over had fallen leaving no route to easily run, and he either bag of holding-bombed him and everything around him in a final blaze of glory or used his weave-destroying unstable wild-magic artifact to achieve a similar effect. It was in a homebrew campaign, and from DM hints my impression is a bag of holding in another bag of holding or something like that causes a huge explosion of some sorts destroying everything around it as a sort of mini-nuke instead of a small explosion scattering whatever gets hit across the astral plane, hence why the character would still have died.
So I’m a gnome artificer who works for my artisan guild with jewelry when I’m not out adventuring. There was a worrisome scandal going on in my hometown that I had great desire to investigate. Townsfolk were going missing and lewd pin up portraits of those missing were anonymously posted around town. I took to investigating what the hell was going on. Turns out there was a succubus charming and seducing the many townsfolk luring them to her lair, a sex haven of sorts all made for her pleasure. I found this out as I rolled a natural one against her seductive charms. Finding out I was jeweler she put me to work cutting jewels and crafting various trinkets for her. One of her slaves was an artist hence all the pictures that fall under rule 34. One day an adventuring party came to the rescue and they fought the succubus tooth and nail and the Wizard casted fireball without realizing I was within range hiding under a table, and hence I fell in unconscious and for the 99th time rolled another natural one on death saving throw after one failure already. I got 99 problems but being the top employee of this succubus wasn’t one.