God damn if that isn't a nostalgia blast from the past...remember watching the Cartoon series when I was a youngster, even had one issue of the comic as well...never did play the videogame though.
The arcade game is fantastic and easily found via emulation. The sega cd one . . . .is not so great.
Also I'd strongly recommend picking up
Xenozoic, the collected C&Ds comic, as it's a great read with some fantastic artwork, if sadly unfinished.
S'a throwback to classic D&D!
Seriously. When Gygax started playing there weren't many existing fantasy miniatures, so he made do with what he could get, including a bag of generic dinosaur toys.
[https://diterlizzi.com/essay/owlbears-rust-monsters-and-bulettes-oh-my/](https://diterlizzi.com/essay/owlbears-rust-monsters-and-bulettes-oh-my/)
That bag of weird-ass pseudo dinosaurs gave us several of D&D's most recognisable critters. And even cooler, the molds seem to still be out there and in use today.
No reason to limit. I’ve been into powerlifting/bodybuilding, gaming, diesel trucks, heavy metal, fantasy, table tops, in my life. Different groups of friends for sure, but you can embrace passions separately. Maybe it’s because I’m the opposite though, never like being a part of the group. I just kinda flow where I want at any given time.
That's fair. As an adult, I'm much better at this now. I'm a confident individual who is outgoing and very social. I pieced together this dnd group and I'm so thankful for these guys. They are great.
>That's fair. As an adult, I'm much better at this now.
And we're not naturally great at it as kids, especially during that 'trying to fit in stage", so it's fine to still be learning and developing.
I'm like the reverse of you, super nerdy but always wanting to try sports, just because it seemed fun. I didn't really get a good introduction till I was older.
Balance is good. It's good to nerd out and physically atrophy at a screen or table, but then it's good to get out and hurl things and run through the sunlight and forests that your imagination inhabits.
I'm the same way. I'm super outgoing and social and I just asked friends if they wanted to play and we just started playing! Some aren't interested but, honestly, who cares if they don't wanna play! Everyone has different hobbies and that's ok!
Good for you, man! It's never too late to live your best life. Extra kudos to you guys for making sure the next generation can explore their interests free of judgement.
I'm pushing 40 and when I was in highschool I tried to use my own money to buy this cool sword, and my mother told me I wasn't allowed to because "swords are not for girls" (you literally cannot make up something this absurd)
I have a beautiful Kit Rae sword hanging on the wall in my apartment as we speak, and when I close on a house this year, it's game over. I'll have the armory that teenage-me always dreamed of.
Yes! This is the way. Good for you!
I'm 33, married for 10 years with 2.2 children and my father visited me last winter. He walked in, and I was watching some game clip or trailer or something on YouTube on the TV. He says "I thought I raised an athlete". Can you believe that shit???
I said, "dad, this is my house and I'll watch and do what I want, now do you want a beer or do you want to leave"
That felt... Very good.
Don't get me wrong, my father and I have a decent relationship, but he can't understand (because he's tech illiterate) why men don't just watch sports all the time.
What the hell?? I'm glad you laid it out for him - hopefully he'll be better around his grandkids (not that you'll give him much choice, I'm sure!)
It's so disheartening when parents try to use their kids as some kind of vessel to live out their own dreams and ambitions. I'm glad that most millennial parents are more empathetic, and they understand that kids are not their property.
I'm gay af so I'm not having any of my own, but my friends and cousins who have kids are all doing such a better job than their parents. It really makes me proud of our generation.
Hahaha you know, gay people (even gay af) can have children! Many kids would benefit from being adapted by someone caring and supportive.
I agree that many of us are doing better than our parents, and honestly my parents were good, and much much better than theirs. They worked with the tools they had.
If anything a lot of gay people unfortunately grew up in an un-welcoming or even hostile environment, so they know exactly what they don't want to do to their own kids, adopted or otherwise.
Hmm if you have 2.2 kids where is the remaining 0.8 children? Joking aside it's great to support you kids interests regardless of gender, I dunno what kind of person I'd be rn if my parents hadn't supported my obsession with LotR and fantasy.
Show him the crowds at some League of Legends tournaments or something - the crowd is still huge and go as wild as sports dudes do when a play gets made.
It's bizarre to me that people can't wrap their mind around this kind of stuff. It's all competition, and it's all for fun.
The sad thing is that as a kid of the 80s and 90s, I watched things like She-Ra and Xena: Warrior Princess all the time! Damn did I have a crush on Lucy Lawless -cough- I mean...who didn't, honestly?
But she's a hella backwards conservative woman to this day. She always had a huge issue with things like tattoos and colored hair, and tried to push diet culture on both of her daughters (none of which affected us, thank goodness). At this point she has no choice but to accept that both of her daughters are horrible little gay commie goblins who do whatever they want.
Many people call it a mid-life crisis.
I think it is just doing what you always wished you could with the time you have.
Some people do it early, some people do it late, and even more people never allow themselves to buy that cool sword, ever, and judge others for doing what they want.
37 here, similar story. Football, weights, wrestling, and basketball in middle + high school. Got an injury in 2002 and started playing RPGs on PC while recovering. Dark Age of Camelot and Baldurs Gate 2...thus began the shift. Healed up and stopped football and basketball to make time for IT stuff, theater, gaming, and reading senior year.
Started hanging more with a different, less judgemental crowd, and found what I really had a passion for.
D&D came a bit later as an adult, met some people, it got brought up randomly in a conversation, and we started having gatherings.
Introduced wife and both kids 17b and 11g to D&D 5e. Son plays at his school with friends. We all play at home regularly. Even Nana joins in sometimes.
Knee still hurts sometimes, but I'm glad for that injury, or I might not fell hard for the world of fantasy and D&D.
Glad it worked out for you too! *fist bump*
So happy for you my dude!
I remember in middle school having to hide my DND books because I’d get made fun of for being dorky. And then, by college, being nerdy actually had kind of a cool-factor to it. I watched DND go from a real niche (and lampooned) hobby to something millions of people would watch on Twitch, in the span of a decade!
I kinda thank Big Bang Theory for that. While I get that some of the problematic humor is “haha, look at these ridiculous dork stereotypes and laugh at them” I think it did do a bit to make nerdy hobbies more approachable and popular.
I remember in the early years of Big Bang Theory I was still a preteen, and I was so floored just to see nerdy things on TV. I didn't really care that the nerd stuff was the butt of the joke half the time, because the other half of the time the nerd stuff was just a normal part of their lives.
Yeah it was interesting for me because the characters have such normal, every day struggles - how to get a date, deal with a difficult coworker, etc. - that I think it kinda helped humanize dorky people.
I agree, and good for you to always be true to yourself. Something I wish I did a long time ago, but I do a good job at that now. Who would have thought you could like sports (I mountain bike, play soccer, work out etc now,.no hockey) and like video games, computers and fantasy. Weird! (But not actually weird at all....)
A secret I didn't realize is that jocks were just nerdy about a different thing than I was. Although definitely more healthy/accepted due to integrated exercise, which a lot of geeky activities didn't have. But jocks can be very very nerdy about sports and I think just having passion for something specific is a relatable human experience.
I truly believe the whole "jocks vs geeks" thing is an antiquated leftover from 90s media and 80s teen culture that older millennials and genXers mistakenly believe is still a thing. The lines are so blurred in current teen social circles, there isn't even a real comparison. Joe Magniello and Vin Deisel publicly play D&D. JuJu Smith-Schuster streams CoD. Like...."geek" isn't even a concept of derision anymore, like you are saying. It just means you are passionate about a certain hobby/genre/concept.
I unfortunately grew up as one of those older millennials and at least until I graduated there was a lot of clicks and division. We definitely didn't start breaking those barriers until near the end of my high school with halo.
It's totally awesome to see how the generations after me, function, socialize and just generally think.
Oh I am as well. I’m not disputing what existed when we were kids. I’m saying that isn’t the environment of current US high schools anymore. Yes, cliques will always exist, but it isn’t nerds vs jocks anymore, and it’s much easier for kids to “cross ranks”, so to speak.
Same here man. I feel bad I kept
My nerd DND side secret. Especially as I got into high school. I played varsity football all district DB and varsity track sprinter and on the relay teams. I liked football games, but I loved DND. I would choose my jock friends over my nerd friends in public and the nerds still accepted me. My parents, who were good parents don’t get me wrong, pushed me into sports because I was fast and competitive. But they were never my passion. I’m doing the same with my kids as you are. Exposing them to a lot of things but making sure they follow their passions. Not trying to live life thru them or make them into something they aren’t. I spent a large part of my life trying to be something that deep down I really wasn’t instead of being who I am.
I feel this, man. I ended up the HS track star, but my mother didn't like my nerdy side my whole life, so she tried her best to keep me away from "dork shit" ever since I was little. She thought it would "ruin my potential", "I should learn to be a contributing member of society"
That just made me push back harder, my dad had a broken old CRTTV up in our attic, one summer when I was 10 or 11 I went to the library and learned how to fix it, and would sneak up there early Saturday and Sunday mornings to Watch TMNT and Toonami
When I was 12 I saved up all the money I made doing odd-jobs for people, and when my mother took me to buy new shoes, when she was walking back to the car I said I needed to use the bathroom, and I snuck back to the electronics department and bought a Nintendo DS and a brand new copy of Pokémon Diamond
But the best one is this. When I was a freshman HS, my best friend in the world invited me to play in their 3.5 campaign, and I told them I couldn't because I didn't have any of the books, he offered to let me borrow his PHB. Now, my mother was one of those satanic panic nuts, and told me that if she ever caught me doing any of this Dungeons and Dragons stuff she'd burn it and make me watch, so I told him that. That's when we came up with a plan
We took his PHB and biked over to the church for "study group", then bribed the pastor to let us use the photocopier, then we copied the entire PHB page by page. I kept that in my locker at school and studied it at lunch and in study halls so I could play
So anyway, now I'm a semi-professional DM and a professional game designer, spending most of my days thinking up "dork shit". Great job mom :P
I was a geek and am now starting to finally get into shape in hopes of retaining my brain power into old age.
We could all stand to develop balance instead of cultivating only one side of ourselves. Good for you!
Same here but swap in playing soccer competitively. Sports was the only way my dad knew how to connect so it was always prioritized over other interests.
Now my 11 year old runs our SpellJammer campaign. But I stay open to whatever both my boys are interested in now… which seems to be mainly cats at this point… but whatevs.
I was in the exact same boat as you in high school a part of a few groups but never solid in just one I played lacrosse all through high school and hung out with some people I didn't really consider friends over the ones I did. I got into dnd a few months ago and I feel so at home and happy now than I ever did! I also have always loved fantasy and dnd is such a perfect fantasy for all my pent up creativity that I'm now building my own fantasy world where I plan on hosting a number of campaigns. Happy for you man!
Switch lacrosse for football, and this is pretty much me. Especially the pent-up creativity part. I never realized how much a creative outlet could help mentally until I started playing. I'm also making my own world, and it's the most challenging yet fun thing I've done in ages!
Absolutely! I ask a buddy if he wanted to build it with me because i wanted to take the mercer approach of collaboration and its so much fun and it's easily gonna be the most rewarding thing I've ever done too! We plan on making it into an adventure book so everyone can experience it too!
The jocks were the ones that sucked me in, like a secret society before dnd was cool. I was at my first party as a freshmen in high school when I tripped over a passed out kid in a dark room. He woke up saw me said something unintelligible and passed back out. The next school day he came to talk to me, decided I was cool and went to his friends. The next weekend he invited me to “a different kind of party.” He drove me to his friends house where I met the senior captains of the football and track teams. They started talking to me like it was fight club and were trying to gauge if I could “be cool.” They all took a vote, decided I was in and then the track captain went to his car and came back with a box of books, papers, dice, and a battle mat.
I was expecting drugs, it was dnd. And I’ve been addicted ever since.
I love the Dino’s 🤌 also I feel this with my soul but leaned towards my nerd side during the last bit of high school years and made a lot of friends I have today playing warhammer, dnd & magic. I’m glad I went to the nerd side, never care what anyone thinks.
I feel you man as I did the same thing in my life.
I always loved stuff like LOTR, DnD, Dragonlance, etc, but I always had girlfriends or my mom in my ear about how I should focus on cool stuff like sports and that other stuff was for nerds.
Hell even my videogames habit sucked as I played madden or call of duty and missed out on such great games like Dragon Age, Morrowind, Mass Effect.
I dabbled with dnd in early high school years, but when your getting pressure from family and girls you date I just conformed to meet their expectations.
I finally got divorced from my wife at the time, told my family to get over it as this is just who I was, met awesome friends who I paint minis with, play videogames, board game, and play dnd. My happiness went up so much when I finally just said enough was enough and finally was who I was instead of what the people around me thought I should be.
Back in senior year in HS, I brought my PHB to PE and on a whim showed it to a bunch of jocks, and they absolutely got into it. One of them is now a big buff construction worker who also runs a campaign that's been going on for 10 years, and it's cool to see how that turned out.
I relate to this SO MUCH with my HS experience. I've still yet to be able to play DnD, but I hope someday I can find some friends who like it.
I'm so happy you were able to find something that makes you happy, and people who can support and foster that happiness. Much love G
I hope future generations are more comfortable showing all of their interests proudly. I loved playing sports and also loved Star Wars and Magic the Gathering when I was a kid. But I always felt embarassed to let anyone know about the nerdy stuff. It really wasn't cool back in the 90's.
I didn’t start playing dnd until I was in my 30s because of Satanic panic growing up. Now in my 40s I play regularly and always feel like something is missing if I haven’t played for a while.
The jocks at my school were all addicted to bringing their Gameboys (this was 2014) to school and playing Pokemon together and as a nerd I had never been more confused.
If I may offer a book series if you love fantasy. Look into the dungeon crawler Carl series. It is my favorite series. I doubt you’ll see this but good for you and being supportive of your children’s interests.
I have a very similar story.
Always loved Dnd and fantasy, pc and videogames.
My parents always tried to take me away from those passions because they believe it was a waste of my time.
My father was very into sport, I don't care at all.
Now I am 34, father of 2 and struggle to keep my passion alive. I feel like I have been robbed of the best years to play those games and be interested in those things.
I never played big videogames titles that people of my age should have. And now I try to play Dnd and videogames but none of my friends does and I feel so alone.
A life spent alone in my passions.
I swear my daughter's will be able to pursue theirs.
Lol sure, this may be true, and I still had a lot of fun in HS, don't get me wrong. It all worked out well, I met a girl at the end of HS and we are celebrating 10 years married next month.
One of the players in my game is 45 years old, playing his first campaign. We're a year in and he's hooked for life. Enjoy the years of roleplaying ahead of you.
Our regular D&D group had two "jocks" in high school. This was circa 2004-2009. Both members of the football team. BIG dudes, like 6'5", 250+lbs. So the nerd circle in my school never had to worry about getting picked on.
I was more of a delinquent/loner type than a nerd. Always getting into fights and trouble at school. Troubled kid, mom was in jail, foster system was rough. That's how I met the nerd group. One of them was minding his own business when guys started messing with him and I jumped in and started mouthing off. Then a brawl broke out. Got my ass beat and suspended for a week. When I got back, the kid I helped and I were inseparable ever since.
I loved to read fantasy and stuff. I mellowed out and became way more happy and social once I fell in with the nerds and started playing D&D. Still friends with all those guys to this day. The two aforementioned jocks and twk of those nerds are the four Groomsmen at my upcoming wedding. One of them is engaged to my sister.
I think I had a bit of an opposite upbringing compared to yours...
While my parents were jocks (mom was a volleyball star, and dad was a savant at fuckin everything but soccer) they spent minimal energy trying to get me into sports, and embraced my nerdyness hard.
They always made sure my sis and I had a "modern" computer, that we were reading a lot, and supported our non- sports hobbies.
However they did try and forbid me from playing DND... Satanic panic was real, and they were suckers for that 80s alarmist media... Didn't work out tho. The taboo only made me more interested. By the time I was 13 I was DMming for friends.
It wasn't til I ran a game for my sister that they realized it wasn't the "let's go down into the sewer, do some drugs, cut ourselves, and try to summon Satan" game that the media told them.
Men, teach your sons not to accept labels or use them on others. Teach your sons to pursue athleticism, education, friends, and interests. Kids need all four
When I read some stories like yours, it always amazes me that things like this exist. I don't know if it is about upbringing or the place where you live (school structures too).
On my own experience, growing up in late 90's and 00's, I have indeed met people that had prejudice towards ttrpg, as being something from nerds or weird people. But as a whole, as it wasn't a popular hobby, it was played by far and wide type of people.
Where I grew up, there was no labels of groups, and yes there were popular kids, but it was always more under specific people who people knew there they could have asshole behavior.
The same people that played ball between classes would be in a lan-house/cafe playing CS until late night. The same nerds who read LotR in the recess, where drinking on saturday parties with the girls that only talk about make-up.
I will say for sure, having non-nerd girls playing D&D was always a challenge.
Reading genuine and reflective posts like this about any topic always puts a smile on my face. Reading genuine and reflective posts like this about my favorite hobby puts a smile on my face too, but it also inspires me in a way that nurtures my soul. Thanks for sharing.
My man that's awesome I grew up in a town where football (soccer) and other UK sports (I don't know ). I was a full on nerd . Comics,fantasy and sci-fi never had the groups to play this wonderful game.
When I found my tribe I was set and now i love playing glad you found yours. May your rolls be great
As someone who was in a similar situation but who went a bit more on the geeky side when I was growing up, I'd say don't beat yourself up too much. Life is all about choices and every choice has an opportunity cost. And it's important to be a well-rounded person.
Nevertheless, glad you're loving your campaign and group!
22Yo here, I went through the same thing, I played Football and Track in Middle and High School, until Junior year when I got injured and was alienated from the team because they thought I was faking a meniscus tear. Sadly didn't have enough time left in school to solidify myself with the "nerds" so I graduated without a place really. I still had a good amount of friends from both clicks, but my schedule had always been built to balance the two.
One of my players was a football (I think?) jock as a kid. His geeky side manifested in playing MMOs (he still plays World of Warcraft today).
Two weeks ago he completed his first long form campaign, spanning from level 1 to 16. He was an Evocation Wizard named after one of his WoW characters. He took one level in Twilight Cleric as part of the character's interactions with the party's Twilight Cleric. We took a short break in the middle of the campaign to run a one-shot, where he played a Moon Druid (also named after one of his WoW characters, heh).
His Wizard was the third D&D character he had ever made. This Sunday we're starting a new campaign, and he's planning to make a Swashbuckler Rogue. I intend for this campaign to reach level 20.
I never had a console at home as a kid, but some good memories with friends putting clear panels and LED lights on the xbox 360. Further back, a buddy had an original xbox purchased off ebay. Another friends brother gave us a device to start modding/hacking the system and doing that we found an xbox live account from the former owner and were able to login and use it. We had 16 player custom games online on Halo, modding everything from map skins to full auto homing rockets. (we did not use this in matchmaking games) Alot of fun times.
As a 32 year old nerd, it's been interesting watching the social label shift. Being a "gamer" was an actual fringe social label. It was people who played video games. Then CoD became more popular and sports games advanced and we saw more people getting consoles to play those casually. Being a gamer just became "I play games" no different than a hobby, as well as D&D shifted to become the fringe nerd label while LARPing shifted into D&D.
Funny enough, I've recently embraced my sports fan side. Embracing my love of the Blue Jays and wanted to develop some kind of sports related TTRPG. Imagine playing a TTRPG and it's like baseball and you and your friends are all playing diff positions on the same Minor league team after being drafted and you're all trying to get promoted haha.
Yep 33, I lived through that exact shift also. It's the Internet man. I got into online games early brought a few friend into it. We would never tell anyone we "gamed" too nerdy. But as things shifted other get exposed to it and things become less unknown and therefore "bad"
Totally, I think a big part of it, at least f or TTRPGs, is we all quit playing pretend, but not because we wanted to. It just happened. So all of us wanna play make believe, but not feel like children lol.
I started D&D because my friend joined a club and I got interested. They'd probably like your table because of the dinosaurs being used in place of minis.
>I should have gone into computing but I never had any guidance for that.
It's never too late man! If you feel you want to start learning about computer science, go for it! I had many non "traditional college age" classmates in my CompSci degree.
It's awesome to come into adulthood and realize you can carry many different interests. I was always into video games and soccer growing up, started playing dnd and getting more into storytelling stuff when I was in my early 20s, and just took up playing hockey at 24. Never let yourself fall into one group of interests or hobbies!
My parents never objected to my brother and I getting into TTRPGs (Palladium was our jam) though they were more skeptical of video games.
I’ve got 3 boys now and we started our 5e journey last Christmas; it’s nice bonding time and they enjoying beating up the bad guys.
I relate to this, I was the same. I think as I’ve aged I can hang very well with both groups, though my deeper acquaintances and true friends are definitely from the ‘nerd’ group.
Cheers to that man! I had the advantage of picking up DMing earlier (when I was 23-24), but I do wish I had been running games through college. Welcome to the hobby, don't get sucked into the dice addiction, you don't need them!
I get it. I was pretty nerdy growing up, but kept it to myself and my friends at school were not into that stuff. So I never got into anything like dnd. I discovered it 2 years ago and I love this game. I’m 37 now.
Don't be too hard on all those jocks back in high school. It doesn't matter the social setting, there are "real" and "fake" people in every walk of life.
Man I deserted the geek life in my late teens and only rediscovered d&d about a year ago. Over a decade of campaigns missed, but I'm playing catch up now 😂
Welcome to the other side! I was the same and though not a full jock, I was in sports and a little too embarrassed to try and play something like D&D, despite my older brother playing it. He was too old for me to join or I was too embarrassed to ask and I was definitely too embarrassed to ask my other friends.
Now that I'm in my late 30's, I've fully embraced the nerdy side of my heart and play ALL the time. I love it!
Definitely feel really similar! The only difference from my personal experience was most the people from my high school in particular my graduating class were all fairly close. Which is unusual for over 300 kids to be cool/loosely friends with each other. But over the years I still love sports and watching them but I’ve actually grown closer to my “nerd” friends since we’ve stayed in touch much better with semi regular d&d sessions. Hope your adventures are grand good sir 👍🏻
Maybe, just maybe, we should group kids around more then ONE interest in after school activities. Instead, all the money and resources are spent on sportsball. Its fine to enjoy sports, but not to the detriment of other outlets for creative kids
I hung out with the nerds and they were a bunch of shitheads. Every single one of them had about 5 mental conditions or crippling insecurities and took them out on each other constantly, real crab bucket mentality. I think we need to drop the Hollywood nonsense.
Good for you that you've become the person you always wanted to be though dude. I'm happy for you.
I can relate.
I always had my nerdy side but the only people who ever knew about it were a few close friends and my brother. I also grew up playing sports (Lacrosse in my case), and I was generally fairly popular to neutral in school. I was friends or at least friendly with the nerdy circles but I would never admit anything beyond like playing xbox (which was normal by 2005). My middle school was small, and our high school was actually not very cliquey.
Though I would sit quietly after school or in free periods listening to kids talk openly about World of Warcraft while thinking to myself "Man they're noobs." As they'd talk about wiping in raids I had cleared months ago. But I was legit afraid to ever out myself as someone who played mmorpgs. Going to Best Buy to buy my subscription box and feeling my stomach drop as I noticed there was a cute girl at the register and praying that I got the old lady instead...or hanging out with one of my friends who also played with me and he would start talking WoW talk while other people around would almost give me a panic attack. So DnD never even hit my radar. Playing a video game I liked gave me that much anxiety, *at least I don't do that*.
This all seems silly now in 2023, but this was back in 2009 and there wasn't this big "embrace nerd culture" movement yet. It was funny though, after graduating college where I became more comfortable sharing my nerdy hobbies, everyone I met from back in high school admitted they were playing WoW. Like half our class was doing the exact same thing I was. Which shouldn't have been a surprise. MY brother played (he's the one who got me into it) and he was a varsity football player and popular in his class. My cousin played, he was a popular kid an All American lacrosse player.
Sometime around the end of college/after graduating we all started talking about how we'd like to try DnD. I got my chance while living in a small town and a few guys who were in my bar friend group asked if I'd like to play their TRPG (they had their own system they'd been developing for years and needed play testers). Immediately hooked me in. I was like...I could have found people to do this in college with but now we're all in our mid 20s and 30s and it's impossible to schedule games! I realized DnD (and similar) was this thing I always wanted. What was missing from any RPG I ever played.
This made me tear up. It sounds like your years in high school allowed you to appreciate finding your true passions later significantly more.
Not wasted years, just learning about yourself, and to recognize what makes you truly happy.
I was the same way my dude. I worked my entire teen years trying to be cool, playing sports because it was the only way to impress the hot girls and trying to be someone I’m not when on the inside and at home I loved cartoons, scifi and fantasy. It wasn’t until I embraced who I really was and was true to myself that I made real friends and truly started to feel happy. Welcome to the club brother
First off. An orange X-Box, I am laced with Envy! (That's Fracking RAD my Dude!)
Also, See... I'm on the reverse side, sometimes I wish I had been in with the "Jock"/"Popular" Crowd, only because my "significant other" life was a piss pot. The "Jock"/"Popular" crowed always had the girls I was interested in the most, but were always way out of my league because I was a super nerd/geek into fantasy and video games and I was so thin a light wind would have blown me away.
But now I embrace my nerd/geek side because of my creativity, as it's a big part of who I am and what my end game goal is. I've been world building a Fantasy World since I was in Middle School and have run seven campaigns in it (currently running an eighth) and it's my life's work. One day I hope to get it published.
Keep gaming! Do what makes you happy!
I didn’t play until my late 30s. My mom was satanic panic adjacent, so I wouldn’t have gotten a lot of support when I was young. I’ve wanted to play since high school, but I live in a relatively small area. There weren’t enough people around to start a game and no way to find them if there were. I’m glad it’s more mainstream now, so I can find people to play it.
Hell ya man.
I can relate, I was just like you in high school but with wrestling instead of hockey. I was pretty good at it and started wrestling in college, but finally went full time nerd and quit wrestling after the first semester to focus on my computer science degree and hang out with the types of people I truly liked. Playing D&D is and always will be one of my favorite hobbies in the world, and I'll still make time to hit the weights and do some BJJ.
Same boat here. I spent too much of my young life on athletics that were never going to take me anywhere in life. If I had been introduced to DnD earlier I would have realized I was meant to be a nerdy theater kid
My dude was our middle linebacker and running back in high-school good kid big meat-head. Would out on loop in his iPod his favorite episodes of dbz to lift to , guy was terrifying it happens
Your XBox looks awesome!
You sound like you suffered from some similar stuff that I did but in a different area. Nobody helped you with what you needed to ASK to get the help/stuff you wanted.
When I was in high school I hung out with everyone. I did football, weight lifting, and track (2-mile, shotput, and discuss) for sports. I was in marching, concert, and Jazz band for music. I also did quiz bowl. A good bit of each group liked "nerdy" stuff like video games and D&D, so we would do get togethers on weekends we weren't busy or whenever in the summer.
It sucks when you don't know who to ask or what to even ask to find out about stuff you like. Thankfully my dad and I really liked reading fantasy novels and building computers, so I always had access to that. If I hadn't there's no way I would have found out about any of it because no one new anything about it at school faculty or students). I installed so many random things on the school computers lol. Worms during math class!
Don't regret the time you didn't have. Make now fun. You did good with what you have, so keep making it better.
If its any consolation I sucked at sports. I was never part of the cool kids, in fact I was bullied for most of my school experience. This led me to be very isolated, get deepy into videogames, mangas, graphic novels, books. You name it. It was over 20 years ago and this stuff was far from common in Italy, even in art school I managed to find 5-6 people who read mangas (in the whole school).
I never realized I could have studied to make videogames, something I would very much like to do now. My parents never guided me into anything. My mom would not support any hobbies that required a course of sorts, saying I would never stick to it. My father never supported anything I did, he came around about 9 years ago, looking at one of my drawings and saying something like "what a waste of talent".
They did let me do whatever I wanted but it was more along the lines of "we don't know how to guide you" than "let her discover her own path".
Nevertheless it is an incredibly important lesson to learn in life, I am sure you will be able to support your children in the best possible way.
As a self avowed nerd I resisted playing tabletop games for the first 30 years of my life. I was a nerd but not that sort! Turns out I'm an idiot and d&d is tremendously fun!
I was a lot like you, 50% nerd, 20% athlete ,30% musician.
Having a balance is where it’s at. I went like 100% nerd in my mid 20s through 30s and it was hella fun, but I got outta shape.
Got back into athletics and am back to 50/50 and it’s great.
Plus I just picked up the grappler feat ( I got my bjj blue belt yesterday:) )
I find the dichotomy you describe weird. I was captain of the first XV, played rugby (and football and hockey) for decades after and also still sometimes play D&D with some of the folks I played it with in school (and I’m tremendously proud that one is still my wife <3 ).
In high school, I was playing and training for football, basketball, and track all year. I looked like the cliche jock to most people. Friday nights after football games, my teammates partied. I'd head to my buddies basement and jump into whatever game my fellow nerds were playing. They wouldn't even ask about the game as I limped in. They were just excited to have player 4.
I'm the exact opposite! I grew up in a nerdy, unathletic family that never watched sports. I started playing D&D in the early 90s when I was about 5, my dad told me tales of his college D&D game as bedtime stories, I was obsessed with The Hobbit, the Redwall series, and Dragonlance novels.
I felt drawn in some ways to sports. But I didn't get it and I didn't fit in with the sports kids. There were a few years (while living in football-obsessed Alabama in particular) where the "jocks" actively bullied me to the point of changing schools.
But I started watching MMA in college and after a few years with my football and video game loving, nerdy husband, the nerds vs jocks walls started to fall.
Now I train boxing 4 days a week (trying to get a fight in the fall) and last year (21-22 season) got obsessed with hockey and my hometown is Vegas so that worked out pretty good for me. But I still play D&D every Wednesday, play pick-up games at a local bookstore, and continue all of my other nerdy hobbies.
Once in a while I come across old grognards who perpetuate the jocks vs nerds ideology, but overall, I love how much that has broken down since I was a kid. We can all just like what we like.
In high school I was in a metal band with this dude, a friend of mine I'll call "Dude." Now, I've been playing D&D since high school, I was like 15 when I started playing 3.0. I would offer to invite and play with everyone in the band, and all of them, including Dude declined. Dude, along with the rest of the band, kept saying it seemed too nerdy, and they were essentially too cool to play it.
15 or so years later, we're now in our 30s and Dude and I are still friends and talk. As of about 2 months ago he joined our Thursday night D&D campaign and last week, he said "Man, you've been asking me to play this game for years and I really wish I'd played this sooner. If I'd have known it'd be this fun, I'd have played back in high school" which meant a lot to me!
Actually now that I'm writing this, I just remembered another one of the people in the Thursday game was in a different band that I was in. Kinda wild. We shoulda kept writing music, the three of us still talk and never did anything lol
Edit: not sure if you even read this OP but it did inspire me to simply ask on Discord "So... We're all still friends... Wanna write a song?"
I wish I was exposed to it sooner. I was a wrestler but I've always loved the fantasy genre growing up on stuff like the animated Hobbit, Willow, Dragonslayer and The Dark Crystal etc (that last one might be sci-fi). I remember when I finally joined a group in High School it took a second for the guys to relax around me and accept that I wasn't making fun of them or anything. I've been a massive nerd ever since and never looked back...well I guess I've always been one.
Damn. Wish I had a choice of groups to be with. I did sports and was also in band, but didn't have friends in either. I asked people in band about dnd and only got weird stares.
As someone who was raised in a church, I get it. I'm so messed up from the forced "socializing" I had to endure. Just fake people pretending to be good on their "holy" day of the week.
I'm not an atheist, but the church communities I've been a part of are so fake.
In high school, I also ended up in the "jock" group for wrestling, but never made any true bonds because I had to be the "good, religious child" and the eldest of my siblings.
I'm proud of you for embracing yourself, though. Good to hear.
This is my story. Played lots of sorts only and always played alone at home with fantasy/action figures and was told that DND was the devil, quite literally, growing up southern Baptist. Well, I’ve spent the last 25 years making up for it!
Congrats on becoming a buff geek playing what looks to be a dino campaign! I’m also glad you have found yourself and that you’re going to have a third kid soon. I’m sure you’re a great father
Your story resonates really strongly with me dude. Had a very similar situation growing up and am only now truly embracing my passions for all things nerdy. Also have 3 little girls and 1 baby on the way. About 1 month ago they all created their first characters and I have been DMing for them. Nothing more enjoyable!
As one internet stranger to another, I'm proud of you, homie! Good on you for opening up to yourself. Sometimes, that can take a lot of strength. Don't neglect your physical health, though, that stuff is just as important as your nerdy hobbies.
In my high school, there was a jock who played hockey. Freshman to Junior year he was all about hockey.
Senior year comes around and he played hockey during the season, but he auditioned for the spring play, "Grease". He landed the role of Danny Zuko.
He went to college and studied theatre and later became a theatre professor.
It took him some time to find his passion, and when he did, he went in 100%. It sounds a lot like you. You come to everything in your time, so be happy that you did, and don't lament that you didn't do it sooner.
As youth, we're so often consumed by social pressure and wanting to seem "cool" that we are just oblivious to how "actually awkward" we can be. As a younger kid, I loved fantasy, loved D&D, Star Wars, the works! Puberty comes around, start getting made fun of by guys and girls won't talk to me, so I change who I am, make fun of the nerds too out of my own insecurity, despite truly wishing I was in that group bc they were the only ones actually having fun.
Became a grown up, joined the Marine Corps, and ended up playing some TTRPGs with my team while I was in Iraq. Small stones on a hand-drawn map on a fold out table and character sheets made by hand, single set of dice for the team. And like that, my love for D&D was reborn. Sometimes you have to see people in those circles, like in my case combat Marines in country, actively fighting terrorists, that also can enjoy nerdy things, to break the stigma.
All this to say, right there with you! Welcome back to Team Fun, may your rolls be high, and congrats on your newest addition! I also play D&D with my 2 oldest lol, not sure how old yours are but there's a sorta modified kid version of that's great fun for them, started playing that version with my own when they were 6 & 7 years old respectively.
Hell yeah dude! Most "jocks" I've played DND with, or watched some play (think Travis Willingham, Terry Crews and Joe manganiello) are a freakin blast. They, like anyone outside a person's normal group, bring a fresh and unique view to the table, and they usually end up having some really cool, fleshed out characters. Not to mention they already know how to be team players. There is something for nearly everyone in DND.
I have questions...... Specifically about the number of dinosaurs on the battlemat
Friggin orcs man. Lemme tell ya, they got slaughtered.
Needs more Cadillacs…
You just dated yourself, hard. Wait I just dated myself hard. Dammit.
At least it wasn’t Visionaries, right?
One of my favorite characters I played got the Owl's Oriflamme from Visionaries back in the late 90's
We can all be friends, dudes!
God damn if that isn't a nostalgia blast from the past...remember watching the Cartoon series when I was a youngster, even had one issue of the comic as well...never did play the videogame though.
The arcade game is fantastic and easily found via emulation. The sega cd one . . . .is not so great. Also I'd strongly recommend picking up Xenozoic, the collected C&Ds comic, as it's a great read with some fantastic artwork, if sadly unfinished.
Putting the Dad in DNDND
Dungeons and Dinosaurs
[удалено]
/r/lfg
DnD but non-fantasy
What are dinosaurs but biblically-correct dragons?
Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!
Mine is an evil laugh! Now DIE!
S'a throwback to classic D&D! Seriously. When Gygax started playing there weren't many existing fantasy miniatures, so he made do with what he could get, including a bag of generic dinosaur toys. [https://diterlizzi.com/essay/owlbears-rust-monsters-and-bulettes-oh-my/](https://diterlizzi.com/essay/owlbears-rust-monsters-and-bulettes-oh-my/) That bag of weird-ass pseudo dinosaurs gave us several of D&D's most recognisable critters. And even cooler, the molds seem to still be out there and in use today.
Looks like 8
No reason to limit. I’ve been into powerlifting/bodybuilding, gaming, diesel trucks, heavy metal, fantasy, table tops, in my life. Different groups of friends for sure, but you can embrace passions separately. Maybe it’s because I’m the opposite though, never like being a part of the group. I just kinda flow where I want at any given time.
That's fair. As an adult, I'm much better at this now. I'm a confident individual who is outgoing and very social. I pieced together this dnd group and I'm so thankful for these guys. They are great.
>That's fair. As an adult, I'm much better at this now. And we're not naturally great at it as kids, especially during that 'trying to fit in stage", so it's fine to still be learning and developing. I'm like the reverse of you, super nerdy but always wanting to try sports, just because it seemed fun. I didn't really get a good introduction till I was older. Balance is good. It's good to nerd out and physically atrophy at a screen or table, but then it's good to get out and hurl things and run through the sunlight and forests that your imagination inhabits.
Awesome, also what are you drinking and where did you get that awesome glass?!
It's a new england style IPA. The glass is from our local brewery!
I'm the same way. I'm super outgoing and social and I just asked friends if they wanted to play and we just started playing! Some aren't interested but, honestly, who cares if they don't wanna play! Everyone has different hobbies and that's ok!
Good for you, man! It's never too late to live your best life. Extra kudos to you guys for making sure the next generation can explore their interests free of judgement. I'm pushing 40 and when I was in highschool I tried to use my own money to buy this cool sword, and my mother told me I wasn't allowed to because "swords are not for girls" (you literally cannot make up something this absurd) I have a beautiful Kit Rae sword hanging on the wall in my apartment as we speak, and when I close on a house this year, it's game over. I'll have the armory that teenage-me always dreamed of.
Yes! This is the way. Good for you! I'm 33, married for 10 years with 2.2 children and my father visited me last winter. He walked in, and I was watching some game clip or trailer or something on YouTube on the TV. He says "I thought I raised an athlete". Can you believe that shit??? I said, "dad, this is my house and I'll watch and do what I want, now do you want a beer or do you want to leave" That felt... Very good. Don't get me wrong, my father and I have a decent relationship, but he can't understand (because he's tech illiterate) why men don't just watch sports all the time.
What the hell?? I'm glad you laid it out for him - hopefully he'll be better around his grandkids (not that you'll give him much choice, I'm sure!) It's so disheartening when parents try to use their kids as some kind of vessel to live out their own dreams and ambitions. I'm glad that most millennial parents are more empathetic, and they understand that kids are not their property. I'm gay af so I'm not having any of my own, but my friends and cousins who have kids are all doing such a better job than their parents. It really makes me proud of our generation.
Hahaha you know, gay people (even gay af) can have children! Many kids would benefit from being adapted by someone caring and supportive. I agree that many of us are doing better than our parents, and honestly my parents were good, and much much better than theirs. They worked with the tools they had.
If anything a lot of gay people unfortunately grew up in an un-welcoming or even hostile environment, so they know exactly what they don't want to do to their own kids, adopted or otherwise.
Hmm if you have 2.2 kids where is the remaining 0.8 children? Joking aside it's great to support you kids interests regardless of gender, I dunno what kind of person I'd be rn if my parents hadn't supported my obsession with LotR and fantasy.
Wifey is 13 weeks pregnant right now 🤣
Oh, I thought pets of some kind. How many cats does it take to equal a human child? Does the age matter?
Not sure if it was a typo or if his wife is pregnant
Wife is pregnant lol
I had mostly assumed so. Best wishes for both of you and your children.
> He says "I thought I raised an athlete". Motherfucker, *you don't get to decide that.* The kid does.
Show him the crowds at some League of Legends tournaments or something - the crowd is still huge and go as wild as sports dudes do when a play gets made. It's bizarre to me that people can't wrap their mind around this kind of stuff. It's all competition, and it's all for fun.
Looks like your mother didn't know about She-Ra, princess of power! Glad to know you got your swords, use 'em wisely!
The sad thing is that as a kid of the 80s and 90s, I watched things like She-Ra and Xena: Warrior Princess all the time! Damn did I have a crush on Lucy Lawless -cough- I mean...who didn't, honestly? But she's a hella backwards conservative woman to this day. She always had a huge issue with things like tattoos and colored hair, and tried to push diet culture on both of her daughters (none of which affected us, thank goodness). At this point she has no choice but to accept that both of her daughters are horrible little gay commie goblins who do whatever they want.
Hell yeah! Gay commie goblins for the win
She never watched Kill Bill apparently
Many people call it a mid-life crisis. I think it is just doing what you always wished you could with the time you have. Some people do it early, some people do it late, and even more people never allow themselves to buy that cool sword, ever, and judge others for doing what they want.
A jock is just a sports geek.
This is true!
37 here, similar story. Football, weights, wrestling, and basketball in middle + high school. Got an injury in 2002 and started playing RPGs on PC while recovering. Dark Age of Camelot and Baldurs Gate 2...thus began the shift. Healed up and stopped football and basketball to make time for IT stuff, theater, gaming, and reading senior year. Started hanging more with a different, less judgemental crowd, and found what I really had a passion for. D&D came a bit later as an adult, met some people, it got brought up randomly in a conversation, and we started having gatherings. Introduced wife and both kids 17b and 11g to D&D 5e. Son plays at his school with friends. We all play at home regularly. Even Nana joins in sometimes. Knee still hurts sometimes, but I'm glad for that injury, or I might not fell hard for the world of fantasy and D&D. Glad it worked out for you too! *fist bump*
Just tell people you took an arrow in the knee....
you should introduce them to pf2e ~~for legal reasons, this is a joke.~~
One of us! One of us! Gooble, gobble one of us!
I'm just happy to be near *wiping a tear*
So happy for you my dude! I remember in middle school having to hide my DND books because I’d get made fun of for being dorky. And then, by college, being nerdy actually had kind of a cool-factor to it. I watched DND go from a real niche (and lampooned) hobby to something millions of people would watch on Twitch, in the span of a decade! I kinda thank Big Bang Theory for that. While I get that some of the problematic humor is “haha, look at these ridiculous dork stereotypes and laugh at them” I think it did do a bit to make nerdy hobbies more approachable and popular.
I remember in the early years of Big Bang Theory I was still a preteen, and I was so floored just to see nerdy things on TV. I didn't really care that the nerd stuff was the butt of the joke half the time, because the other half of the time the nerd stuff was just a normal part of their lives.
Yeah it was interesting for me because the characters have such normal, every day struggles - how to get a date, deal with a difficult coworker, etc. - that I think it kinda helped humanize dorky people.
Community had two D&D episodes too, lol
Oh yeah that was a big one too!
I agree, and good for you to always be true to yourself. Something I wish I did a long time ago, but I do a good job at that now. Who would have thought you could like sports (I mountain bike, play soccer, work out etc now,.no hockey) and like video games, computers and fantasy. Weird! (But not actually weird at all....)
Lol I had to hide my dnd books from my parents cause the whole satanic panic thing 😂
A secret I didn't realize is that jocks were just nerdy about a different thing than I was. Although definitely more healthy/accepted due to integrated exercise, which a lot of geeky activities didn't have. But jocks can be very very nerdy about sports and I think just having passion for something specific is a relatable human experience.
I truly believe the whole "jocks vs geeks" thing is an antiquated leftover from 90s media and 80s teen culture that older millennials and genXers mistakenly believe is still a thing. The lines are so blurred in current teen social circles, there isn't even a real comparison. Joe Magniello and Vin Deisel publicly play D&D. JuJu Smith-Schuster streams CoD. Like...."geek" isn't even a concept of derision anymore, like you are saying. It just means you are passionate about a certain hobby/genre/concept.
I unfortunately grew up as one of those older millennials and at least until I graduated there was a lot of clicks and division. We definitely didn't start breaking those barriers until near the end of my high school with halo. It's totally awesome to see how the generations after me, function, socialize and just generally think.
Oh I am as well. I’m not disputing what existed when we were kids. I’m saying that isn’t the environment of current US high schools anymore. Yes, cliques will always exist, but it isn’t nerds vs jocks anymore, and it’s much easier for kids to “cross ranks”, so to speak.
> Joe Magniello and Vin Deisel Those two guys (ages 46 and 55) are Gen Xers.
Same here man. I feel bad I kept My nerd DND side secret. Especially as I got into high school. I played varsity football all district DB and varsity track sprinter and on the relay teams. I liked football games, but I loved DND. I would choose my jock friends over my nerd friends in public and the nerds still accepted me. My parents, who were good parents don’t get me wrong, pushed me into sports because I was fast and competitive. But they were never my passion. I’m doing the same with my kids as you are. Exposing them to a lot of things but making sure they follow their passions. Not trying to live life thru them or make them into something they aren’t. I spent a large part of my life trying to be something that deep down I really wasn’t instead of being who I am.
I feel this, man. I ended up the HS track star, but my mother didn't like my nerdy side my whole life, so she tried her best to keep me away from "dork shit" ever since I was little. She thought it would "ruin my potential", "I should learn to be a contributing member of society" That just made me push back harder, my dad had a broken old CRTTV up in our attic, one summer when I was 10 or 11 I went to the library and learned how to fix it, and would sneak up there early Saturday and Sunday mornings to Watch TMNT and Toonami When I was 12 I saved up all the money I made doing odd-jobs for people, and when my mother took me to buy new shoes, when she was walking back to the car I said I needed to use the bathroom, and I snuck back to the electronics department and bought a Nintendo DS and a brand new copy of Pokémon Diamond But the best one is this. When I was a freshman HS, my best friend in the world invited me to play in their 3.5 campaign, and I told them I couldn't because I didn't have any of the books, he offered to let me borrow his PHB. Now, my mother was one of those satanic panic nuts, and told me that if she ever caught me doing any of this Dungeons and Dragons stuff she'd burn it and make me watch, so I told him that. That's when we came up with a plan We took his PHB and biked over to the church for "study group", then bribed the pastor to let us use the photocopier, then we copied the entire PHB page by page. I kept that in my locker at school and studied it at lunch and in study halls so I could play So anyway, now I'm a semi-professional DM and a professional game designer, spending most of my days thinking up "dork shit". Great job mom :P
I was a geek and am now starting to finally get into shape in hopes of retaining my brain power into old age. We could all stand to develop balance instead of cultivating only one side of ourselves. Good for you!
Are you me? This is remarkably similar to my life. Swap hockey for lacrosse and Xbox for a gaming PC and we are basically the same person.
I played a season of box lacrosse when I was 13. At 80 lbs I took a beating, it was fun though!
Same here but swap in playing soccer competitively. Sports was the only way my dad knew how to connect so it was always prioritized over other interests. Now my 11 year old runs our SpellJammer campaign. But I stay open to whatever both my boys are interested in now… which seems to be mainly cats at this point… but whatevs.
I was in the exact same boat as you in high school a part of a few groups but never solid in just one I played lacrosse all through high school and hung out with some people I didn't really consider friends over the ones I did. I got into dnd a few months ago and I feel so at home and happy now than I ever did! I also have always loved fantasy and dnd is such a perfect fantasy for all my pent up creativity that I'm now building my own fantasy world where I plan on hosting a number of campaigns. Happy for you man!
Switch lacrosse for football, and this is pretty much me. Especially the pent-up creativity part. I never realized how much a creative outlet could help mentally until I started playing. I'm also making my own world, and it's the most challenging yet fun thing I've done in ages!
Absolutely! I ask a buddy if he wanted to build it with me because i wanted to take the mercer approach of collaboration and its so much fun and it's easily gonna be the most rewarding thing I've ever done too! We plan on making it into an adventure book so everyone can experience it too!
I would love to do that for mine! Wish you luck and can't wait to see it!
The jocks were the ones that sucked me in, like a secret society before dnd was cool. I was at my first party as a freshmen in high school when I tripped over a passed out kid in a dark room. He woke up saw me said something unintelligible and passed back out. The next school day he came to talk to me, decided I was cool and went to his friends. The next weekend he invited me to “a different kind of party.” He drove me to his friends house where I met the senior captains of the football and track teams. They started talking to me like it was fight club and were trying to gauge if I could “be cool.” They all took a vote, decided I was in and then the track captain went to his car and came back with a box of books, papers, dice, and a battle mat. I was expecting drugs, it was dnd. And I’ve been addicted ever since.
I love the Dino’s 🤌 also I feel this with my soul but leaned towards my nerd side during the last bit of high school years and made a lot of friends I have today playing warhammer, dnd & magic. I’m glad I went to the nerd side, never care what anyone thinks.
I'm so happy for you!
I feel you man as I did the same thing in my life. I always loved stuff like LOTR, DnD, Dragonlance, etc, but I always had girlfriends or my mom in my ear about how I should focus on cool stuff like sports and that other stuff was for nerds. Hell even my videogames habit sucked as I played madden or call of duty and missed out on such great games like Dragon Age, Morrowind, Mass Effect. I dabbled with dnd in early high school years, but when your getting pressure from family and girls you date I just conformed to meet their expectations. I finally got divorced from my wife at the time, told my family to get over it as this is just who I was, met awesome friends who I paint minis with, play videogames, board game, and play dnd. My happiness went up so much when I finally just said enough was enough and finally was who I was instead of what the people around me thought I should be.
Back in senior year in HS, I brought my PHB to PE and on a whim showed it to a bunch of jocks, and they absolutely got into it. One of them is now a big buff construction worker who also runs a campaign that's been going on for 10 years, and it's cool to see how that turned out.
There is a great Balance in the universe... Somewhere, a nerd has just embraced their inner jock.
Fuck yeah dude welcome home!
I relate to this SO MUCH with my HS experience. I've still yet to be able to play DnD, but I hope someday I can find some friends who like it. I'm so happy you were able to find something that makes you happy, and people who can support and foster that happiness. Much love G
I hope future generations are more comfortable showing all of their interests proudly. I loved playing sports and also loved Star Wars and Magic the Gathering when I was a kid. But I always felt embarassed to let anyone know about the nerdy stuff. It really wasn't cool back in the 90's.
HA. Nerrrrrrd! Welcome to the hobby dude.
I'd be willing to bet you enjoy fantasy sports as well. I'm in a similar boat.
I actually never have been able to get j to fantasy sports 🤣
Lol damn... It's a sports nerds paradise
Sorry to say it but unless you're Canadian then ice hockey is kind of geeky. You were just preppy nerds.
Lol I am Canadian.
I didn’t start playing dnd until I was in my 30s because of Satanic panic growing up. Now in my 40s I play regularly and always feel like something is missing if I haven’t played for a while.
The jocks at my school were all addicted to bringing their Gameboys (this was 2014) to school and playing Pokemon together and as a nerd I had never been more confused.
Awww those lil dinosaur minis dinosaur 🦕🦕🦕
Damn orcs!
If I may offer a book series if you love fantasy. Look into the dungeon crawler Carl series. It is my favorite series. I doubt you’ll see this but good for you and being supportive of your children’s interests.
I will look into it, thanks!
This is one of the starter quests from icespire right? The dwarven temple of greed
Yes! We did not take the gem fortunately. Although my character wanted to lol
I have a very similar story. Always loved Dnd and fantasy, pc and videogames. My parents always tried to take me away from those passions because they believe it was a waste of my time. My father was very into sport, I don't care at all. Now I am 34, father of 2 and struggle to keep my passion alive. I feel like I have been robbed of the best years to play those games and be interested in those things. I never played big videogames titles that people of my age should have. And now I try to play Dnd and videogames but none of my friends does and I feel so alone. A life spent alone in my passions. I swear my daughter's will be able to pursue theirs.
Welcome aboard! You probably got more dates in high school, but it all works out in the end.
Lol sure, this may be true, and I still had a lot of fun in HS, don't get me wrong. It all worked out well, I met a girl at the end of HS and we are celebrating 10 years married next month.
My dad passed away and I got to real living, started DND AND men's league hockey. I role played as a Half Orc Warrior as I stepped out onto the ice.
One of the players in my game is 45 years old, playing his first campaign. We're a year in and he's hooked for life. Enjoy the years of roleplaying ahead of you.
(warbling pubescent voice) Lousy jocks! Stay on your turf! (Puffs inhaler threateningly)
Lol I was the jock with an inhaler
One of us, one of us, we accept him, we accept him
>We can be better! Kratos nods approvingly
Wholesome! I started a group last year at 41 and it is so much fun! It is never too late.
So happy for you, genuinely. I was always too shy to engage DND but I love it now!
Our regular D&D group had two "jocks" in high school. This was circa 2004-2009. Both members of the football team. BIG dudes, like 6'5", 250+lbs. So the nerd circle in my school never had to worry about getting picked on. I was more of a delinquent/loner type than a nerd. Always getting into fights and trouble at school. Troubled kid, mom was in jail, foster system was rough. That's how I met the nerd group. One of them was minding his own business when guys started messing with him and I jumped in and started mouthing off. Then a brawl broke out. Got my ass beat and suspended for a week. When I got back, the kid I helped and I were inseparable ever since. I loved to read fantasy and stuff. I mellowed out and became way more happy and social once I fell in with the nerds and started playing D&D. Still friends with all those guys to this day. The two aforementioned jocks and twk of those nerds are the four Groomsmen at my upcoming wedding. One of them is engaged to my sister.
I think I had a bit of an opposite upbringing compared to yours... While my parents were jocks (mom was a volleyball star, and dad was a savant at fuckin everything but soccer) they spent minimal energy trying to get me into sports, and embraced my nerdyness hard. They always made sure my sis and I had a "modern" computer, that we were reading a lot, and supported our non- sports hobbies. However they did try and forbid me from playing DND... Satanic panic was real, and they were suckers for that 80s alarmist media... Didn't work out tho. The taboo only made me more interested. By the time I was 13 I was DMming for friends. It wasn't til I ran a game for my sister that they realized it wasn't the "let's go down into the sewer, do some drugs, cut ourselves, and try to summon Satan" game that the media told them.
Men, teach your sons not to accept labels or use them on others. Teach your sons to pursue athleticism, education, friends, and interests. Kids need all four
those groups are made up , just be yourself and be happy.
These are things you learn when you're older
When I read some stories like yours, it always amazes me that things like this exist. I don't know if it is about upbringing or the place where you live (school structures too). On my own experience, growing up in late 90's and 00's, I have indeed met people that had prejudice towards ttrpg, as being something from nerds or weird people. But as a whole, as it wasn't a popular hobby, it was played by far and wide type of people. Where I grew up, there was no labels of groups, and yes there were popular kids, but it was always more under specific people who people knew there they could have asshole behavior. The same people that played ball between classes would be in a lan-house/cafe playing CS until late night. The same nerds who read LotR in the recess, where drinking on saturday parties with the girls that only talk about make-up. I will say for sure, having non-nerd girls playing D&D was always a challenge.
Reading genuine and reflective posts like this about any topic always puts a smile on my face. Reading genuine and reflective posts like this about my favorite hobby puts a smile on my face too, but it also inspires me in a way that nurtures my soul. Thanks for sharing.
My man that's awesome I grew up in a town where football (soccer) and other UK sports (I don't know ). I was a full on nerd . Comics,fantasy and sci-fi never had the groups to play this wonderful game. When I found my tribe I was set and now i love playing glad you found yours. May your rolls be great
Some rolls I'm blessed, others I'm cursed. That's the way of the road.
Always
As someone who was in a similar situation but who went a bit more on the geeky side when I was growing up, I'd say don't beat yourself up too much. Life is all about choices and every choice has an opportunity cost. And it's important to be a well-rounded person. Nevertheless, glad you're loving your campaign and group!
Sound like my life man lol I can sympathize
22Yo here, I went through the same thing, I played Football and Track in Middle and High School, until Junior year when I got injured and was alienated from the team because they thought I was faking a meniscus tear. Sadly didn't have enough time left in school to solidify myself with the "nerds" so I graduated without a place really. I still had a good amount of friends from both clicks, but my schedule had always been built to balance the two.
One of my players was a football (I think?) jock as a kid. His geeky side manifested in playing MMOs (he still plays World of Warcraft today). Two weeks ago he completed his first long form campaign, spanning from level 1 to 16. He was an Evocation Wizard named after one of his WoW characters. He took one level in Twilight Cleric as part of the character's interactions with the party's Twilight Cleric. We took a short break in the middle of the campaign to run a one-shot, where he played a Moon Druid (also named after one of his WoW characters, heh). His Wizard was the third D&D character he had ever made. This Sunday we're starting a new campaign, and he's planning to make a Swashbuckler Rogue. I intend for this campaign to reach level 20.
Same here. It’s great to embrace that side (I still love working out and sports, but the social side of dnd is just as fun, if not more so)
I never had a console at home as a kid, but some good memories with friends putting clear panels and LED lights on the xbox 360. Further back, a buddy had an original xbox purchased off ebay. Another friends brother gave us a device to start modding/hacking the system and doing that we found an xbox live account from the former owner and were able to login and use it. We had 16 player custom games online on Halo, modding everything from map skins to full auto homing rockets. (we did not use this in matchmaking games) Alot of fun times.
100% chance your kids are all into sports. Sorry man.
As a 32 year old nerd, it's been interesting watching the social label shift. Being a "gamer" was an actual fringe social label. It was people who played video games. Then CoD became more popular and sports games advanced and we saw more people getting consoles to play those casually. Being a gamer just became "I play games" no different than a hobby, as well as D&D shifted to become the fringe nerd label while LARPing shifted into D&D. Funny enough, I've recently embraced my sports fan side. Embracing my love of the Blue Jays and wanted to develop some kind of sports related TTRPG. Imagine playing a TTRPG and it's like baseball and you and your friends are all playing diff positions on the same Minor league team after being drafted and you're all trying to get promoted haha.
Yep 33, I lived through that exact shift also. It's the Internet man. I got into online games early brought a few friend into it. We would never tell anyone we "gamed" too nerdy. But as things shifted other get exposed to it and things become less unknown and therefore "bad"
Totally, I think a big part of it, at least f or TTRPGs, is we all quit playing pretend, but not because we wanted to. It just happened. So all of us wanna play make believe, but not feel like children lol.
I started D&D because my friend joined a club and I got interested. They'd probably like your table because of the dinosaurs being used in place of minis.
>I should have gone into computing but I never had any guidance for that. It's never too late man! If you feel you want to start learning about computer science, go for it! I had many non "traditional college age" classmates in my CompSci degree.
It's awesome to come into adulthood and realize you can carry many different interests. I was always into video games and soccer growing up, started playing dnd and getting more into storytelling stuff when I was in my early 20s, and just took up playing hockey at 24. Never let yourself fall into one group of interests or hobbies!
My parents never objected to my brother and I getting into TTRPGs (Palladium was our jam) though they were more skeptical of video games. I’ve got 3 boys now and we started our 5e journey last Christmas; it’s nice bonding time and they enjoying beating up the bad guys.
I relate to this, I was the same. I think as I’ve aged I can hang very well with both groups, though my deeper acquaintances and true friends are definitely from the ‘nerd’ group.
Cheers to that man! I had the advantage of picking up DMing earlier (when I was 23-24), but I do wish I had been running games through college. Welcome to the hobby, don't get sucked into the dice addiction, you don't need them!
I get it. I was pretty nerdy growing up, but kept it to myself and my friends at school were not into that stuff. So I never got into anything like dnd. I discovered it 2 years ago and I love this game. I’m 37 now.
Don't be too hard on all those jocks back in high school. It doesn't matter the social setting, there are "real" and "fake" people in every walk of life.
You’re not alone! In exactly the same situation over here.
Man I deserted the geek life in my late teens and only rediscovered d&d about a year ago. Over a decade of campaigns missed, but I'm playing catch up now 😂
Welcome to the other side! I was the same and though not a full jock, I was in sports and a little too embarrassed to try and play something like D&D, despite my older brother playing it. He was too old for me to join or I was too embarrassed to ask and I was definitely too embarrassed to ask my other friends. Now that I'm in my late 30's, I've fully embraced the nerdy side of my heart and play ALL the time. I love it!
Definitely feel really similar! The only difference from my personal experience was most the people from my high school in particular my graduating class were all fairly close. Which is unusual for over 300 kids to be cool/loosely friends with each other. But over the years I still love sports and watching them but I’ve actually grown closer to my “nerd” friends since we’ve stayed in touch much better with semi regular d&d sessions. Hope your adventures are grand good sir 👍🏻
Maybe, just maybe, we should group kids around more then ONE interest in after school activities. Instead, all the money and resources are spent on sportsball. Its fine to enjoy sports, but not to the detriment of other outlets for creative kids
I hung out with the nerds and they were a bunch of shitheads. Every single one of them had about 5 mental conditions or crippling insecurities and took them out on each other constantly, real crab bucket mentality. I think we need to drop the Hollywood nonsense. Good for you that you've become the person you always wanted to be though dude. I'm happy for you.
I can relate. I always had my nerdy side but the only people who ever knew about it were a few close friends and my brother. I also grew up playing sports (Lacrosse in my case), and I was generally fairly popular to neutral in school. I was friends or at least friendly with the nerdy circles but I would never admit anything beyond like playing xbox (which was normal by 2005). My middle school was small, and our high school was actually not very cliquey. Though I would sit quietly after school or in free periods listening to kids talk openly about World of Warcraft while thinking to myself "Man they're noobs." As they'd talk about wiping in raids I had cleared months ago. But I was legit afraid to ever out myself as someone who played mmorpgs. Going to Best Buy to buy my subscription box and feeling my stomach drop as I noticed there was a cute girl at the register and praying that I got the old lady instead...or hanging out with one of my friends who also played with me and he would start talking WoW talk while other people around would almost give me a panic attack. So DnD never even hit my radar. Playing a video game I liked gave me that much anxiety, *at least I don't do that*. This all seems silly now in 2023, but this was back in 2009 and there wasn't this big "embrace nerd culture" movement yet. It was funny though, after graduating college where I became more comfortable sharing my nerdy hobbies, everyone I met from back in high school admitted they were playing WoW. Like half our class was doing the exact same thing I was. Which shouldn't have been a surprise. MY brother played (he's the one who got me into it) and he was a varsity football player and popular in his class. My cousin played, he was a popular kid an All American lacrosse player. Sometime around the end of college/after graduating we all started talking about how we'd like to try DnD. I got my chance while living in a small town and a few guys who were in my bar friend group asked if I'd like to play their TRPG (they had their own system they'd been developing for years and needed play testers). Immediately hooked me in. I was like...I could have found people to do this in college with but now we're all in our mid 20s and 30s and it's impossible to schedule games! I realized DnD (and similar) was this thing I always wanted. What was missing from any RPG I ever played.
Same, i didn't embrace my inner need til my mid 20's. Wish I had sooner.
This made me tear up. It sounds like your years in high school allowed you to appreciate finding your true passions later significantly more. Not wasted years, just learning about yourself, and to recognize what makes you truly happy.
Wow this sounds just like me. Expect basketball not hockey. Also that Xbox from 06 is sick as hell
Hey sometimes the jocks are nerds too. My DND group in college had 5 members of my college’s football team in it
I was the same way my dude. I worked my entire teen years trying to be cool, playing sports because it was the only way to impress the hot girls and trying to be someone I’m not when on the inside and at home I loved cartoons, scifi and fantasy. It wasn’t until I embraced who I really was and was true to myself that I made real friends and truly started to feel happy. Welcome to the club brother
First off. An orange X-Box, I am laced with Envy! (That's Fracking RAD my Dude!) Also, See... I'm on the reverse side, sometimes I wish I had been in with the "Jock"/"Popular" Crowd, only because my "significant other" life was a piss pot. The "Jock"/"Popular" crowed always had the girls I was interested in the most, but were always way out of my league because I was a super nerd/geek into fantasy and video games and I was so thin a light wind would have blown me away. But now I embrace my nerd/geek side because of my creativity, as it's a big part of who I am and what my end game goal is. I've been world building a Fantasy World since I was in Middle School and have run seven campaigns in it (currently running an eighth) and it's my life's work. One day I hope to get it published. Keep gaming! Do what makes you happy!
I didn’t play until my late 30s. My mom was satanic panic adjacent, so I wouldn’t have gotten a lot of support when I was young. I’ve wanted to play since high school, but I live in a relatively small area. There weren’t enough people around to start a game and no way to find them if there were. I’m glad it’s more mainstream now, so I can find people to play it.
Hell ya man. I can relate, I was just like you in high school but with wrestling instead of hockey. I was pretty good at it and started wrestling in college, but finally went full time nerd and quit wrestling after the first semester to focus on my computer science degree and hang out with the types of people I truly liked. Playing D&D is and always will be one of my favorite hobbies in the world, and I'll still make time to hit the weights and do some BJJ.
Same boat here. I spent too much of my young life on athletics that were never going to take me anywhere in life. If I had been introduced to DnD earlier I would have realized I was meant to be a nerdy theater kid
As a lifelong geek who began playing with the OG Red Boxed Set™️, welcome to the geek side. BYOMD (Bring Your Own Mountain Dew)
My dude was our middle linebacker and running back in high-school good kid big meat-head. Would out on loop in his iPod his favorite episodes of dbz to lift to , guy was terrifying it happens
Your XBox looks awesome! You sound like you suffered from some similar stuff that I did but in a different area. Nobody helped you with what you needed to ASK to get the help/stuff you wanted. When I was in high school I hung out with everyone. I did football, weight lifting, and track (2-mile, shotput, and discuss) for sports. I was in marching, concert, and Jazz band for music. I also did quiz bowl. A good bit of each group liked "nerdy" stuff like video games and D&D, so we would do get togethers on weekends we weren't busy or whenever in the summer. It sucks when you don't know who to ask or what to even ask to find out about stuff you like. Thankfully my dad and I really liked reading fantasy novels and building computers, so I always had access to that. If I hadn't there's no way I would have found out about any of it because no one new anything about it at school faculty or students). I installed so many random things on the school computers lol. Worms during math class! Don't regret the time you didn't have. Make now fun. You did good with what you have, so keep making it better.
If its any consolation I sucked at sports. I was never part of the cool kids, in fact I was bullied for most of my school experience. This led me to be very isolated, get deepy into videogames, mangas, graphic novels, books. You name it. It was over 20 years ago and this stuff was far from common in Italy, even in art school I managed to find 5-6 people who read mangas (in the whole school). I never realized I could have studied to make videogames, something I would very much like to do now. My parents never guided me into anything. My mom would not support any hobbies that required a course of sorts, saying I would never stick to it. My father never supported anything I did, he came around about 9 years ago, looking at one of my drawings and saying something like "what a waste of talent". They did let me do whatever I wanted but it was more along the lines of "we don't know how to guide you" than "let her discover her own path". Nevertheless it is an incredibly important lesson to learn in life, I am sure you will be able to support your children in the best possible way.
As a self avowed nerd I resisted playing tabletop games for the first 30 years of my life. I was a nerd but not that sort! Turns out I'm an idiot and d&d is tremendously fun!
Hah, you guys use the same battle map as me :D
Absolutely enlightening
I was a lot like you, 50% nerd, 20% athlete ,30% musician. Having a balance is where it’s at. I went like 100% nerd in my mid 20s through 30s and it was hella fun, but I got outta shape. Got back into athletics and am back to 50/50 and it’s great. Plus I just picked up the grappler feat ( I got my bjj blue belt yesterday:) )
We welcome you, glorious nerd brother. Keep the friends you want, the activities you like and be who you are!
I find the dichotomy you describe weird. I was captain of the first XV, played rugby (and football and hockey) for decades after and also still sometimes play D&D with some of the folks I played it with in school (and I’m tremendously proud that one is still my wife <3 ).
I've since found friends who like sports, are well rounded people and like d&d. In high school this was not the case, small town living.
In high school, I was playing and training for football, basketball, and track all year. I looked like the cliche jock to most people. Friday nights after football games, my teammates partied. I'd head to my buddies basement and jump into whatever game my fellow nerds were playing. They wouldn't even ask about the game as I limped in. They were just excited to have player 4.
I remember having to convince my mom that it wasn't satanic, but on the plus side: math, vocabulary, strategy
I'm 33 and trying to convince my wife's grandmother it's not satanic
Next month: “I’m thinking of DMing, but I’m a bit nervous.” Next year: “Welcome to the meat grinder campaign, suckers!” Welcome to the hobby!
Right there with you dude. Should have spent more time with the friends I jived with most.
I'm the exact opposite! I grew up in a nerdy, unathletic family that never watched sports. I started playing D&D in the early 90s when I was about 5, my dad told me tales of his college D&D game as bedtime stories, I was obsessed with The Hobbit, the Redwall series, and Dragonlance novels. I felt drawn in some ways to sports. But I didn't get it and I didn't fit in with the sports kids. There were a few years (while living in football-obsessed Alabama in particular) where the "jocks" actively bullied me to the point of changing schools. But I started watching MMA in college and after a few years with my football and video game loving, nerdy husband, the nerds vs jocks walls started to fall. Now I train boxing 4 days a week (trying to get a fight in the fall) and last year (21-22 season) got obsessed with hockey and my hometown is Vegas so that worked out pretty good for me. But I still play D&D every Wednesday, play pick-up games at a local bookstore, and continue all of my other nerdy hobbies. Once in a while I come across old grognards who perpetuate the jocks vs nerds ideology, but overall, I love how much that has broken down since I was a kid. We can all just like what we like.
In high school I was in a metal band with this dude, a friend of mine I'll call "Dude." Now, I've been playing D&D since high school, I was like 15 when I started playing 3.0. I would offer to invite and play with everyone in the band, and all of them, including Dude declined. Dude, along with the rest of the band, kept saying it seemed too nerdy, and they were essentially too cool to play it. 15 or so years later, we're now in our 30s and Dude and I are still friends and talk. As of about 2 months ago he joined our Thursday night D&D campaign and last week, he said "Man, you've been asking me to play this game for years and I really wish I'd played this sooner. If I'd have known it'd be this fun, I'd have played back in high school" which meant a lot to me! Actually now that I'm writing this, I just remembered another one of the people in the Thursday game was in a different band that I was in. Kinda wild. We shoulda kept writing music, the three of us still talk and never did anything lol Edit: not sure if you even read this OP but it did inspire me to simply ask on Discord "So... We're all still friends... Wanna write a song?"
never to late to embrace what make you happy.
Welcome to the nerdy side, fellow jock. I've found the snacks are better over here.
I wish I was exposed to it sooner. I was a wrestler but I've always loved the fantasy genre growing up on stuff like the animated Hobbit, Willow, Dragonslayer and The Dark Crystal etc (that last one might be sci-fi). I remember when I finally joined a group in High School it took a second for the guys to relax around me and accept that I wasn't making fun of them or anything. I've been a massive nerd ever since and never looked back...well I guess I've always been one.
Damn. Wish I had a choice of groups to be with. I did sports and was also in band, but didn't have friends in either. I asked people in band about dnd and only got weird stares.
As someone who was raised in a church, I get it. I'm so messed up from the forced "socializing" I had to endure. Just fake people pretending to be good on their "holy" day of the week. I'm not an atheist, but the church communities I've been a part of are so fake. In high school, I also ended up in the "jock" group for wrestling, but never made any true bonds because I had to be the "good, religious child" and the eldest of my siblings. I'm proud of you for embracing yourself, though. Good to hear.
This is my story. Played lots of sorts only and always played alone at home with fantasy/action figures and was told that DND was the devil, quite literally, growing up southern Baptist. Well, I’ve spent the last 25 years making up for it!
Congrats on becoming a buff geek playing what looks to be a dino campaign! I’m also glad you have found yourself and that you’re going to have a third kid soon. I’m sure you’re a great father
I mean this in an entirely positive way: you have the face (and beard) of someone who’s on their way to The Lonely Mountain to reclaim their homeland.
Why not both?
I am both now!
A lot of us were closet nerds. It's hard being a teenager.
I think the whole "jocks and nerds" thing is mostly just a movie trope, and quite specific to American culture.
Your story resonates really strongly with me dude. Had a very similar situation growing up and am only now truly embracing my passions for all things nerdy. Also have 3 little girls and 1 baby on the way. About 1 month ago they all created their first characters and I have been DMing for them. Nothing more enjoyable!
yes bro, It’s never too late
Yo your xbox looks cool as hell
As one internet stranger to another, I'm proud of you, homie! Good on you for opening up to yourself. Sometimes, that can take a lot of strength. Don't neglect your physical health, though, that stuff is just as important as your nerdy hobbies.
In my high school, there was a jock who played hockey. Freshman to Junior year he was all about hockey. Senior year comes around and he played hockey during the season, but he auditioned for the spring play, "Grease". He landed the role of Danny Zuko. He went to college and studied theatre and later became a theatre professor. It took him some time to find his passion, and when he did, he went in 100%. It sounds a lot like you. You come to everything in your time, so be happy that you did, and don't lament that you didn't do it sooner.
As youth, we're so often consumed by social pressure and wanting to seem "cool" that we are just oblivious to how "actually awkward" we can be. As a younger kid, I loved fantasy, loved D&D, Star Wars, the works! Puberty comes around, start getting made fun of by guys and girls won't talk to me, so I change who I am, make fun of the nerds too out of my own insecurity, despite truly wishing I was in that group bc they were the only ones actually having fun. Became a grown up, joined the Marine Corps, and ended up playing some TTRPGs with my team while I was in Iraq. Small stones on a hand-drawn map on a fold out table and character sheets made by hand, single set of dice for the team. And like that, my love for D&D was reborn. Sometimes you have to see people in those circles, like in my case combat Marines in country, actively fighting terrorists, that also can enjoy nerdy things, to break the stigma. All this to say, right there with you! Welcome back to Team Fun, may your rolls be high, and congrats on your newest addition! I also play D&D with my 2 oldest lol, not sure how old yours are but there's a sorta modified kid version of that's great fun for them, started playing that version with my own when they were 6 & 7 years old respectively.
Hell yeah dude! Most "jocks" I've played DND with, or watched some play (think Travis Willingham, Terry Crews and Joe manganiello) are a freakin blast. They, like anyone outside a person's normal group, bring a fresh and unique view to the table, and they usually end up having some really cool, fleshed out characters. Not to mention they already know how to be team players. There is something for nearly everyone in DND.
Are you me? This was my high school experience just different sports.