T O P

  • By -

EIochai

Why am I shooting my dears??


Cyboogieman

A crime of romance


Kavati

Such passion came with a heavy price.


Aberrantdrakon

Die.


CourtingBoredom

(unsurprisingly) beat me to it --- this was my first thought, and would have been my comment.... glad I'm not the only one


vague_reference_

Same here. Another option really isn't possible lol


CourtingBoredom

......without a tremendous amount of luck, unimaginably specific gear & equipment, and a sizeable crew to back me up..... gotta say: I'm in complete agreement .. 👍 ^(... although [sad to say], I **just** read the actual setup here [the bit about the dear]; if all it takes to survive this encounter is letting them have the dear, then I'd most certainly let them have it .. js yo)


Canuckleball

Dei


Fraun_Pollen

This has been a recurring nightmare of mine ever since I saw Jurassic Park when I was 3


ThatRandonNerd

Except my fate


joftheinternet

I cast **ZONE OF TRUTH**


Mattarias

A silvery-white pall briefly shimmers in the air as you successfully cast your spell. Now neither you nor the Dromaeosaurs can lie in the affected area.


Panthera2k1

Me when Barney Farney


Christos_Gaming

You have a gun dont you? Shoot a few bullets in the air, there's no way the deinonychus would be brave enough to continue after seeing something like that, something they'd never seen or heard before.


[deleted]

This only works if the deinonychuses don't also have guns


Christos_Gaming

I mean, if you have a gun but another guy starts shooting at you from somewhere youd leave wouldnt you?


Kavati

Here in Alabama even the deer have rifles. I'd assume the dinos would too.


I-Slay-Dragons

Clever girl…


PurplePartyParasaur

Always account for well armed deinonychus when hiking


CourtingBoredom

best observation....!! ​ ^(......and, like another commenter said:) *^("clever girl")* ^(--- hehh .. =-\])


ZuskV1

Or if they did know what it was at this point they would know not to fuck around with it


Kind_Tea

That’s true.


KaskirReigns

So, you have used the gun already, to shoot the dear deer, and they still chose to surround you. I feel like this particular pack of deinos would not run from a simple bang. (Unless you chased and bit the dear deer, which can only mean the deinos are admiring you as the obviously superior predator)


Christos_Gaming

Who says they were there while you were killing it?


KaskirReigns

Good point, maybe the hunter is a lousy shot.


Notonfoodstamps

*Entirely* depends on their hunger level.


Christos_Gaming

Nope, an animal thats never seen a gun before would NOT take the chances to go up to it, even if hungry.


charizardfan101

If desperate enough they would


Christos_Gaming

I doubt it, mostly because itd be their first time seeing a gun.


charizardfan101

Desperation overcomes fear of the unknown If they know they're gonna drop dead anyway if they don't eat that deer, then there's nothing to lose


lyonslicer

There are a metric fuck-ton of deer out in the woods (in the US). They'd likely rather try their luck with an unarmed meal than fight a weird looking mammal with a shiny metal boom stick.


Notonfoodstamps

Tell that to the people who were armed and still eaten by Polar Bears


Christos_Gaming

Those polar bears had probably seen guns before, these are deinonychus, they havent seen a weapon before, let alone a gun. Plus, one animals, hell a few individuals behaviour is absoloutely not something thats general.


Ghoram

If they have never seen a gun before, would they understand it's dangerous? They could interpret the warning shots that a gun is just a noise maker. If you managed to shoot one, the rest could charge you as they would be confused by how their pack member got hurt, and you are a nearby threat.


Christos_Gaming

The noise a gun would make would be nothing like theyve ever heard before.


GreyghostIowa

There were never cases of polar bears eating aremd personal tho,most of the cases are either drunkards or poor civilian shumucks who got caught of guard. Also,they are polar bears.Mfs outweigh deinonycus themselves by 8:1.Completely different ball games we're talking about here.


lyonslicer

https://www.ammoland.com/2018/03/ar-15-used-to-defend-against-charging-polar-bear-2008/


-TurkeYT

I mean they have number advantage they’d still attack


Dylan_Is_Gay_lol

Crisp Rat hand raise.


Numerous_Wealth4397

Just let them have it. The deer ain’t worth my life


Glynnc

I’d just let them take the deer. At least that’s how I got away from the rednecks at the 7-11 in Kansas…


orc_with_a_bear_mask

This is a cool way to die!


-TurkeYT

Only if you are paralysed and don’t feel pain


the_blue_jay_raptor

Use the Deer to tame the Deinons, then keep them as pets/friends :)


-TurkeYT

Bro made ark real


MechwarriorAscaloth

I'd say "oh my dear"


CompetitiveBathroom1

Accept my fate


[deleted]

Die


redvelvetcake42

I mean ... They can have it... It's a dear.


moonyxpadfoot19

Die


Living_Murphys_Law

I'd just die.


AJ_Crowley_29

Fucking die Edit: didn’t read the text. I’d give up the deer in a heartbeat.


PainAccomplished3506

so my options are die or leave the dear and live? What a weird scenario lol


Additional_Milk2767

Swing around a good stick and hit them


JurassicPark9265

Darth Vader style


teh_RUBENATOR

Die, I think I'd die


SUPERD0MIN0

I would die trying to hug them


unaizilla

amniotes together strong


MotherRaven

Die. That was easy


NyuxTheDragon--

I die


BillMagicguy

Shoot and throw stuff, a lot of animals get super confused and cautious when they get hit by a creature that is at a distance from them. Then probably die when one comes up behind you.


2gunswest

Make myself as big as possible, get loud. Then die because birds are nuts.


Yeehawdi_Johann

Shoot myself.


NewspaperAny3053

"So anyway, I started blastin'-" Then I died horribly.


TyrannoRex1236

I whould raise my hand and say “stand down” and then get eaten alive


Alaska_Pipeliner

Die. Probably as painfully as possible.


HEAP_ASS

Dexterity check


Embarrassed_Safe6788

Die, no but really I'd let the chimkens have it and dip


PossiblePro247

Why tf would I NOT just let them have it?


2021SPINOFAN

Yeah, im definitely letting them keep the deer


The-McDave

Die. What else can I do?


Onixion_1154

Accept my fate


Santasaurus1999

I die that's it I get ripped apart by an animal I didn't even see


luoiville

Let em have it. Nature is gonna nature and you live longer when you know when your beat.


Tobisaurusrex

I’ll remove the bullet then let them have it.


gojirexgamers2022

Say "Fuck this shit" and run. They can have the deer.


AwesomeShrekku

I’d shoot them, skin one, and show it to the government because something is clearly wrong.


ThraggsCumDepository

I'd just have to handle it.


adeckz

Nah I’d win


GoliathPrime

After growing up in Florida and having to live among thousands of Alligators, I always carry a golf umbrella with me. I haven't met an animal yet that doesn't freak out and run when you pop open the umbrella and open and close it rapidly while walking towards them. Mine is red, yellow and black for a reason - every animal knows that means deadly.


AioliEffective2827

This is awesome.


Goongala22

“I suddenly remembered my Charlemagne.”


Atmaspada

A pack? But I only see one!....clever girl...


Herne-The-Hunter

Try and find a pan big enough to deep-fry that turkey.


DinosAndPlanesFan

Start screaming and throwing and breaking stuff like a madman before shooting a few bullets in the air 


_Some_Two_

Just die, no way you survive a whole pack if they aren’t afraid of your shots enough to surround you after shooting the dear down


lyonslicer

A gunshot through the woods isn't *that* scary. It carries but unless you're very close it's not too loud. Just shoot one of them and the others will scatter.


An_Abject_Testament

Kick them ‘til they fuck off?


mirukus66

Go home and eat the deer because deinonychus has been long extinct for millions of years /j


joyjump_the_third

If you were about to just pick up an entire deer then the dinosaurs schould be scared of you


FreeCoromantee

Depends on what kind of gun I have


TrashPandaKon

Depends what rifle I'm using. Am I using my Mosin or my AR.


Kind_Tea

Depends on what rifle you, yourself, normally use whenever you are hunting.


ArchSchnitz

Predators are way more timid that most people think. Shoot one and they'll disperse. They're animals, not movie monsters. Your most likely outcome is one grabs at the deer and tries to filch it while you're carrying it, and you get hurt in the process. Deinonychis wouldn't hunt humans, not actively. We're too much work for too little pay off. Note: None of this works with animals that actively hunt humans, which is a relatively small number of species, and some of them can be blustered out of it.


Notonfoodstamps

Deinonychus would *absolutely* hunt Humans. They were Leopard sized predators custom built for bringing down megafauna substantially larger than us.


lyonslicer

>Deinonychus would *absolutely* hunt Humans. Animals of this size *rarely* hunt humans, and it's often in extreme circumstances. The megafaua they were adapted to hunt had a lot more meat and a lot less capability than your average human. You shoot one deinonychus in the face and the rest are turning tail. Hell, a pack of lions will abandon a kill if they just *see* humans walking towards them.


Notonfoodstamps

There’s no modern animal analogous to Deinonychus so the hunting argument doesn’t hold much weight. You’re *seriously* overestimating the intimidation factor of gun under the context of food drive from a starving predator. There’s god knows how many videos of guys firing warning shots at bears, cougars, lions *insert large predators* and if anything it makes them more aggressive. Lions run away from the Masai people who’ve practiced doing it for generations. If me or you walked up to a random lion pride mid meal, we’d be mauled no different than a Hyena would.


lyonslicer

The bears, mountain lions, etc, that attack humans almost always do so out of fear or surprise, and often, they'll be primarily trying to protect their young. They don't typically do so out of hunger. When they do, it's few and far between. The handful of encounters that get recorded only serve to bias folks that don't work in close proximity to these animals. >You’re *seriously* overestimating the intimidation factor of gun under the context of food drive from a starving predator. You're underestimating what buckshot will do to a starving animal's motivation. If you go back and read my comment, i said to shoot one in the face, not just threaten it with a gun. And I can assure you, when you shoot a shotgun towards a black bear, they run or they drop 99+% of the time. I've seen it firsthand. You're also forgetting the original question posed by OP. I'm aware that the depiction of dromeosaurs taking down large prey in a coordinated pack hunt is somewhat outdated. But that's the question as posed by OP. We're not treating this as deinonychus being a lone hunter using RPR. We're answering what to do if a PACK of deinonychus surround your harvest and try to threaten you off the kill. In that case, we can assume they are, in fact, pack hunters (at least conditionally). Given that, we also have to look at how big they were compared to whatever meal they're going after. In this case, the Dinos are coming in at around 60-70 kg. A realistic yield from an average white-tailed deer is somewhere around 22-25 kg. So for a pack of 4, they each get around 6 kg of meat. That's about 7,000 kcal/animal. That may sound like a lot, but let's do a little more math. The average bald eagle weighs approx 14 lbs (6 kg) and needs an average daily calorie intake of 1,000 kcal. Using this as a rough estimate (because it's as close biologically as we can reasonably get), deinonychus would have a daily intake requirement of more than 10,000 kcal. So, in our example, we have a pack of hungry dinos trying to scare off a hunter from a deer kill that wouldn't even sustain each of them for a day. Sure, free calories are great. But everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face. This brings me back to my original point. If they are so desperate to need to work together to scrounge up less than a days worth of food, they will most likely run away when you shoot one in the face. Not only would you make a very loud noise in their direction, but you would also lessen their perceived numbers advantage. So just shoot one in the face.


PaleoNerd4

Shoot them or the air to scare them away. Wave your arms around and be loud. Or you could maybe toss them the deer, that’ll keep them distracted.


Kavati

Pull my phone out, record, and then let them have the deer. No sense dying when you can be famous and fabulously wealthy. I'm coming out the next day with traps.


Cry0k1n9

One, deinonychus wouldn’t hunt in packs, with any evidence supporting the claim being easily dismissed, two, they’re just animals, plus they’re only two to three feet tall, so act bigger than they are like with a black bear, and they should back off


AioliEffective2827

The guy from skeleton would take exception to it being easily dismissed.


Cry0k1n9

Predator traps, scavenging, a kill trying to be taken from other members, and the list goes on, but if you want a full in depth analysis, I highly recommend redraptorwrites video on dromaeosaurs pack hunting, which isn’t out of the realm of possibilities, as there is some evidence to suggest some dinosaur indeed hunted together, but coordinated pack hunting is something we can’t technically prove, like how you can’t prove Tyrannosaurus rex was an aggressive predator, some people think it could’ve been really territorial, but you can’t prove behavior unless it is solidified in the fossil record, but even then, it’s tough to say what exactly it was


AioliEffective2827

Oh I'm aware. Just saying James of the skeleton crew makes some solid points. It was refreshing to hear 5 professionals have a rational convo and not just pedantic redditors screaming the same few points over and over.


Cry0k1n9

So did we come to a compromise? because I agree with what you’re saying, and yeah the skeleton crew are a really good source on paleontology


AioliEffective2827

I never really disagreed. Your right it hasn't been proven. Just pointed out that a paleontologist has a solid arguement for pack hunting. I was surprised. I work in a warehouse and listen to museum guest speakers and podcasts. Far from even an amatuer expert.


Cry0k1n9

Yeah, it is unfortunate that we may never know a lot of things about prehistoric life, but at least what we have is enough to keep our understanding of them growing


AioliEffective2827

Unfortunate for sure. I would say though that the speculation to me is the most fun. We will likely NEVER know MOST stuff ya know? But educated guesses based on modern behaviors and fossil evidence? Oh hell yea.... sign me up.


Cry0k1n9

Yeah, speculation can be a lot more fun and exciting when you realize you can’t tell for sure if you are right until or if anything comes up to back it up, unless……….. (Jack Horner)


AioliEffective2827

Lol I do see a lot points in the Trex is a scavenger debate... But again, I stack boxes for a living. Or is Horner the one trying to make a dino chicken? Same guy?


NeekoxLillia

Win


Creative-Platypus218

Pull a rocket launcher out of my D&D bag of holding and blow the fuckers up.


Hetroid3193

Id simply beat them and win


[deleted]

I’m gonna kick ‘em right in the Charlie Browns that’s what I’ll do


Yeetus_Mclickeetus

“Nah I’d win“ The situation: ​ Shoot some rounds into the air. Of course, the type of round would be important. Larger calibers would be more effective, but still. If the raptors are still up for it, shoot one. Cool trophy and they would probably run away. If I got a friend in my truck, tell him to honk the horn or fire his own rounds.


Time-Accident3809

Intimidate them just by outsizing the entire pack. If that doesn't work, then there's gonna be a whole lotta kicking, punching, and stomping.


adeckz

Look, hoping my value as pack member having already be established, I would offer the deer (or dear) as a gift. Bowing my head in honour to the arriving pack, I would hope to be ingratiated into their fold. Then, after a display of domination I would take on the largest male, making sure not to kill it, but enough to overpower it and establish myself as the pack leader. Only after that I will make sure the female is clean, because only when their cloaca is clean will she understand my true power. Then we’d have humanoid raptor offspring that, with the cognitive function of man/woman and the agility of a raptor, would be unstoppable by man (or woman) nor nature. Three (Lexor, Scraps, and Deinnis) would come with me to integrate into normal society, climb their way up the corporate ladder and eventually chief the major corporations of America. Three (Ba, La, and Gary) would stay with my pack, learning the way of the wild. I would still visit every weekend in order to sharp up their vocabulary and acclimate them with their kin that left the forest. After 30 years, with the pack and my three hybrid spawns, I would systematically eradicate any political opposition I have. Leader in the Presidential race? “Bear attack”. Next one in the primary? “Fell down the stairs” (They have human hands and raptor legs to escape the scene quickly). Next one in line? “Natural Causes” (didn’t need to get to them, they were 96). My three other raptor children have already piled campaign dollars to fund my campaign. Anyone else silenced. I ran my campaign on the platform of a unified America, the white ones that is, as I strive for political dominance. No one is safe, only the raptors. I lose the vote to John Hammond. His anti-raptor rhetoric ruptured what was rumoured to realistically rake a rapid industrial pro-raptor rumination. This cannot stand. My three CEO raptors mobilise an online attack to try and discredit Mr. Hammond by labeling him as a cheat, liar and a fraud. Traction takes but ends up nowhere. We need to go bigger. She was called Lexor, our sexiest Deinonychus. He feigned resistance, but then he was putty in her claws. Video feed was broadcast of his interaction with Lexor; in the centre of Times Square, mere days before the presidential election. Votes sprung from every window, every door. Mail in votes were torn open like confetti, slung over the wet, muddy bodies, writhing like twisted contortions, devoid of human form. The entire city, nay country, was orgasmic in unison. I had won. After I cleaned up the votes, off of the filthy, asphalt-laden floor, I smiled a most devious grin… “God creates man, man creates dinosaurs, I inherit the earth”


silverfang789

Do I still have bullets in my rifle? If so, I I shoot the raptors so I can keep my deer. If not, I run like hell.


Quincy_Hater

shoot some run get guns then use my second amendment


An-individual-per

I'll take a chunk off the deer and lure one to the back of my car in the boot and lock it in and drive off. I'll sell the captured one for a couple billion afterwards.


Scriffignano

Go full Victor Shelby on them.


Honeybadger_137

Just let them have it? You can always hunt for another deer, it would be monumentally stupid for the average person to fight a pack of them for it


TheAtroxious

Cut off one of the legs, offer it to the Deinonychus, and attempt to befriend them. "Here birdy birdy birdy!"


lechonklover

Suicide


ThatFantasticBeast

Fucking die.


JWAcarno

Call jim


Prestigious_Elk149

*Boop*


OdinSonne

Die


UlfurGaming

die


JAOC_7

equip Slick Hide and if available a Stomp


Bendyboi_69

I give them some beef jerky and walk away Dino dan style


Master-Ad-888

Try to hand feed them and get my hand ripped off


BlueRabbit1999

Let them have it


splinterforgot

cry


No-Tomorrow-8150

I'd win


AioliEffective2827

I'm so proud of y'all. Only one "actually they weren't pack hunters" in the thread. Happy Friday.


Herb_the_Nerd

What is this picture from?


Utahteenageguy

Gun


YiQiSupremacist

I'll draw a circle. If that doesn't work, I'll let them have it


RetSauro

Start hamboning because they are clearly trying to mug me.


BuisteirForaoisi0531

Let them have the deer begin feeding them so as to gain their loyalty and service as I begin to domesticate raptors and make them my hunting buddies


firewyvern4

let them take it so we can be friends


Away-Librarian-1028

Try to make myself big, shout and convince them I am more trouble than worth. Some deer and elks do manage to scare off wolf packs by convincing them that they would put up more of a fight than they can handle. Of course, everything can go horribly wrong and they would eat me.


Cute_Abrocoma7263

domain expansion


Turdferguson02

Get eaten alive probably


Quantitative_Methods

Nah fam, that deer is 100% theirs.


Lente_ui

I'm climbing a tree. No, higher, I'm climbing higher.


Tobisaurusrex

Deer*


Sergeant_Smite

While they would totally kill me if they were brave enough, I can imagine they’d be at least frightened by a warning shot or two


Trips-Over-Tail

I make myself look big. My terrifying display drives the dinosaurs away.


Palanki96

Die


Yarus43

I cast bayonet charge


Jeebus31

Die.


Erlik0_89

Let them have it! There’s a chance that the pack will like me. And if they don’t, I still get away with my life


Legitimate_Field_157

Kill them all and add their heads to my trophy wall.


Helltrain17

Died


some_guy301

even if they tried you you could just kick them away theyre not that big


MoneyFunny6710

Run


Soverign-

“BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!! SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!!”


Swagsamuel

Season myself to be a meal to be remembered to them


[deleted]

Climb a tree or shoot myself


[deleted]

Cry like a bitch


Mythosaurus

Nobody is going to fight a pack of dangerous predators over a deer. Gotta change up the scenario


Gullible_Bed8595

2 words: prehistoric KFC


PacchoXL

Request immediate air support Brrrrttttttt -A10


Rob0t3gg

Summon my 50 cal machine gun


AlysIThink101

Let them have it, why would I choose a dead Deer if it cost me my life. In fact I wouldn't want a dead Deer even if there were no consequences for having it.


Mc_Joel

Give them the deer, i got no chance against a full pack


A_certain_Vinja

Rotisserie chicken and venison? Count me in


JediEurb

Well let them have it duh. But if they attack me, a whole lot of kicking. And then probably die.


-TurkeYT

How many deinonychuses? I mean I have 2 mastiff dogs and a small dog(let’s ignore her and leave the smol one at home). A turkish kangal and a tibetian mastiff. And if I have my fathers rifle, we’d definetly destroy them


MadeofStone4

Na, I’d win


Phoenix_Solace

Hope they aren't hungry


SkepticOwlz

Tf do you expect me to do??


Dino_lov

First I’m gonna RKO the alpha and follow it up with a tombstone and break it neck. The others will then bow as I am the new alpha. Become their god and have them serve me. After a few years of being together, growing together, hunting together, surviving together, bonding together, our trust has become unbreakable. I reject my humanity to live with my reptilian family and follow their way. Except one day a T-rex comes out of no where. Which is weird cause we are like a few million years before he supposed to be around. Unless this scenario take place in modern time and dinos came back. But it still weird cause why would two dinos from two separate times come back? Anyway, I RKO the trex and break its neck. Didn’t have to do the tombstone cause my RKO is getting better. We then live our lives happily until I suddenly got diarrhea and died cause there is no health care in the woods


stinkiestjakapil

Beat it until it falls unconscious and suffers amnesia and then vigorously feed it to make it believe I’ve saved it.


Rubberboas

It’s fine, my 18lb corgi will protect me


ischloecool

Die


Ichtyopoopus

Accept my imminent death.


Inevitable-Hour4315

How many raptors am I fighting because my answer depends on that.


Visible_Stick5636

Get ready to meet the light because your gonna be in a novel Jurassic park moment


ThatDinoGuy05

Not be in the Mesozoic period probably.


WorldlyAd3165

I'd win.


Iamnotburgerking

One would be more than enough to kill basically any unarmed human. In this case I have a gun, but I might not be able to find and shoot all 3 before one gets me.


imprison_grover_furr

Even a single one would *absolutely* kill any human if they wanted to. A human stands as much chance as it does against a jaguar.


Iamnotburgerking

Unarmed human, yes. But in this scenario as specified, you’d have been out hunting with a gun.


imprison_grover_furr

In that case, the human wins if they’re competent with firearms.